- Wednesday Oct 10, 2007
exercise: 1 hr, 5 min.
total exercise: 13 hr, 10 min.
total calories are a whopping 4200. so, if i burned around 2,000 I still have 2200 leftover calories.
well, it ended up being a really BAD day caloriewise. It seems that since I haven't gained 30 pounds yet, I will just keep on forging ahead with my binges. This is all just very dumb.
my binge = 2100 calories. It included a full bag of chocolate and another bag of gummi candy (halloween stuff...) Now, i'll have to replace it!
Breakfast was a mix of cereal and peanut butter protein powder: 300
Snacked on Peanut Butter m&ms! 250
Lunch was a large salad of romaine and tofu with olive oil and oregano. followed by a bag of cheese-its. I almost started to buy another vending machine snack but realized that i'd had enough. 520
snack after school: 1/2 bag baby carrots, 1/2 block tofu, 2 cups of a bran cereal with 1 scoop of protein powder and some sugar free syrup. 660
- Tuesday Oct 09, 2007
Wed morning edit: I woke up an hour early to drive to the high school to retake my tuberculosis test because last time too many days went by and the reading was no longer accurate. the nurse forgot i was coming and didn't tell me she'd be at a meeting in another town all morning!!!! LOL! Hopefully i'll be able to go at lunch. Otherwise, since you need to show results over a 48 hour period, I'll have to wait till next week! Hmmm. Maybe I'll get the shot tomorrow and be able to show it to another physician over the weekend. i really want to volunteer and cannot without the proper medical records!!!
total cal: 1990.
total exercise: 1 hr, 20 min.
total october: 12 hr, 5 min
I stuck to my food plan until lunch. haha. then, i added in a package of cheese-its from the vending machine. total calories were 1020 up till 3:30 when i got home from school.
After school: at first, i attempted a small snack which lead into a meal. The "meal" consisted of several servings of bread with protein powder and sugar free syrup on it. lol, like french toast almost! i also had a few tomatoes and tofu before eating the "french toast." calories for this stuff equals 750.
total calories so far: 1800. I'll have something later probably, in the evening. its 4:11 right now. (calories were not 1500 for the day as planned. honestly, my focus shouldn't be weight loss anyway.)
- Monday Oct 08, 2007
I promise to make tomorrow a better day. The plan: to eat something tiny with caloric value over the course of the LONG morning until lunch at 1:55pm.
Waking up: the last sip of leftover kombucha (tea with a small amount of calories) and water (not with flavoring tomrrow because i NEED some detox!) (20)
The plan: breakfast = oatmeal + protein powder. (250)
Snack = pack of peanut m&m's spread over the course of the morning...what do you think?? To keep blood sugar up. Because not eating is not working. (250)
Lunch: tomatoes, lettuce, and tofu with olive oil. (300)
Snack: Sports drink during exercise...but I think that so much sugar will make me binge later possibly. Maybe some kind of energy bar throughout execise?? Maybe just carrots? ugh. I want to fix my habit of eating right after school. alright, i've decided: my pound bag of baby carrots could take me through my afternoons into dinner! :) I think I will try this for a week. Is eating a lb of carrots bad for a week straight?? (200)
Dinner: I would something healthy. Whenever i have a "poor" day like today, i always look foward to more veggies and healthy foods i've been missing. Right now, I'm thinking about another salad which WILL include: greens, red pepper, avocado, beans, and maybe even green beans. There WILL be dressing. I'll use a spray balsamic vinegrette. (450?)
The orientation was good. I just let my emotions overwhelm me! so stupid!
Good day yesterday. Poor day today.
breakfast was ok: 600 calories.
I binged when I get home around 2pm from the orientation.
Total calories: 5800. What does that mean? It means I need to try harder and not let me feelings and insecurities get me down.
calories changed. 6100 to be more exact. exercise: 1 hr, 45 min :)
total oct: 10 hrs, 45 min :)
- Sunday Oct 07, 2007
I read about something really cool today that measures almost exactly the calories we burn each day. It's called Body Bug and you wear it on your arm. It's REALLY pricey. No, I'm not buying it. But, it is sooo interesting! :)
Breakfast on Monday: 600 cal. 3 servings whole grain pita chips, protein scoop, 1/2 kelp noodles baked with olive oil and cinnamon/sweet and low on top. Yeah, strange breakfast indeed. I'm happy to report not going back for any other food afterwards! :)
So today was a very good day for me.
I walked about 8 miles or so. Most of it (about 7) was done all at once with a few quick sitting breaks inbetween! There's a really lovely "Greenway" or walking strip adjacent to a major roadway in Queens, NY. It's beautiful because the other side is a Marina with lots of boats and beautiful scenery/nature. I walked there both back and forth. It equals about 5 miles. Then, i also took the footbridge that crosses over the expressway into another whole park which leads into a community and other fields. It's really beautiful.
The only part of the park I didn't really do any walking in at all was the wooded area. I don't know how safe it is to be surrounded by tons of trees and bushes in an area I'm not familiar with. I wouldn't want to become another statistic. I have a few other safe areas left to explore. When i'm done, there's at least one other park I plan on going to before the weather really changes over. BTW, today was like summer again! 80s in October!
Later, I went to the bookstore for a bit and afterwards decided it was still to early to go home. I also decided I still have more energy to spare and I did a bit more walking at a park only 15 minutes from home. I walked for about a half hour there.
I'm assuming total mileage today to be 8 miles. That's an honest estimate.
Total exercise today: 2 hrs, 40 min (actually it's much more, but I cannot account for sitting or really slow walking!).
Total October exercise: 9 hours! yes yes yes!
Tomorrow I have off from work. The plan is to go to the orientation for the hospital I'm going to volunteer at one day per week. After that, it's up in the air. I'll be going to the grocery store to pick up a few things since i didn't today. I plan on some good exercise of course. The plan is to take my bike to the park. I need to lay off the walking a little or my ankle is going to get weak again.
An update, my ankle is doing well these days. The exercises to strengthen the ligaments around it are working! :)
The "oatmeal cake" as described in saturday's entry. 500 cal
1 bag mini carrots and a coffee. 300 cal
lots of water and diet drinks (I'm not planning on laying off those).
1/2 bag kelp noodles 10 cal
Dinner with family, dad's bday:
salad 30 cal
seasoned and baked potatoes with olive oil on them. very good. one of mom's usually well made dishes. 250 cal
meat seasoned with rosemary and other really good spices, baked in the rotiseree. Awesome. I haven't had meat in awhile and it's good and healthy for the body. 300 cal
olive oil and seasoned with salt/pepper asparagus baked in oven - similiarly made to the potatoes. This asparagus is another favorite food in this house, especially by my sister. 150 cal.
dinner: packet of flavored coffee. packet of some kind of cappuccino mix. around 200 cal.
I looked at the cherry pie and couldn't stomach it. The thought of wrecking a good calorie day wasn't going to happen. I worked so hard today at the park and couldn't bear to eat something that looked too rich to have only one bite. LOL.
I'm guesstimating calories to be between 1800-1900. i hope i'm not too off. This was a better calorie day than i've been having in awhile. Pretty balanced nutritionally. I like the idea of a substantial breakfast, few but healthy snacking throughout the day followed by a good dinner.
- Saturday Oct 06, 2007
SUNDAY AM edit: today I made sure to have breakfast and I ate exactly what i wanted. I had oatmeal with chocolate protein powder, egg whites, sugar free syrup, and peanut butter all mixed in. It was quite good. I didn't add a lot of water. It turns into a cake like treat and it's high in fiver, protein, good carbs, with a little fat. I also had two fish oil tablets. my skin has been a little dry...and i know increasing the oils helps. I had them in my house.
calories for Breakfast are 500.
Today is my dad's birthday and there's fruit pie. I guess i should have some, why not? we'll see. Parents are making dinner.
had a scoop of protein blended into ice to make an "ice cream"
calories i think are around 2200
taco bell at 2pm steak chalupa, nachos and cheese, caramel apple empanada, cinnamon twists.
pizza at 4pm- assorted stuff (the leftovers were sitting on my kitchen countertop when i got home. I took them to my room and ate everything that my family left over.)
3 plum tomatoes and grapes after the pizza.
exercise: 2 hrs.(1 hr walking, 1 hr elliptical at separate times during the day.)
basically, because life is so rocky right now (even though i'm probably in a much better situation than half the people in the United States!) it becomes really easy for me to make poor health choices and not care about myself the way I should.
I guess I should remember that I AM worth it...and that I do have the potential to be and look the best I can.
Once again, I need to write that I am not a garbage dump.
- Friday Oct 05, 2007
exercise: 55 min.
total exercise: 4 hrs, 20 min :)
wanna know something really scary? my average calories for the past 30 days = 3237 per day.
those calories indicate an approximate 10 lb gain in 30 days.
- Thursday Oct 04, 2007
I weighed myself after not doing so for around 2 weeks at least. I looked at the unexpected scary number: over 120 lbs. The last time I weight this much was waaaay back 5 years ago. I do believe I still know what to do to loose the weight.
workin at it...
walking to get my car and the train station and then heading over to the gym. by for now :)
exercise: i did 1 hr, 25 min :)
total oct exercise = 3 hrs, 25 min.
- Wednesday Oct 03, 2007
exercise: 65 min.
edit: binged after school.
after the soup...instead of having dinner later at subway, i had:
2 servings tam tam whole grain crackers: 240
entire pint of cottage cheese: 480
chocolate pudding: 120
egg crackers: 175
peanut butter: 300
small binge = 1315 calories + rest of day = 2770 calories. well, i'm actually fine with it. (don't ask!)
Breakfast: oatmeal with one scoop of chocolate protein powder and one egg in it...as well as some maple syrup on top. this dish was like an oatmeal pudding/soft cake. 300
snack 1: 1/2 pb sandwich 200
snack 2: 1/2 pb sandwich 200, packet of juice mix - 20
lunch: black beans and lettuce with olive oil 380?
snack 3: tortilla soup with kelp noodles and a plum. 340
snack 4: whole grain tam tam crackers. this turned into a small binge.
exercise: exercising at the university. update to come.
- Tuesday Oct 02, 2007
today's exercise = 1hr :)
thanks for the continued support in times of need! :) I'm feeling better! :)
today was a good day. i'm just soooo tired today! I actually came home and layed down for a bit after work. going out to exercise soon! :) I will also do some reading! I keep saying that, but it never gets done! haha. and i enjoy reading, once i get into it.
I was so disgusted by the somewhat dirty carpet in my room that i ended up vacuuming it this morning! haha...before work! :)
today was good...tomorrow will be even better! I have really exciting goals ahead for these 3 months. I plan to update with my success.
basically, the reason i have some good days and some not must be because any change in schedule and uncertainty causes me to sometimes fall back on food. food is sometimes treated as my comfort and that i believe is why i have some good days and some bad. however, these next three months, i'm sticking to my plan (unless i find it doesn't work!). I plan to update with fitness and weight loss success! :)
- Monday Oct 01, 2007
did horribly today. ate great in the AM and lunch too. binged when i got home. 4800 calories.
exercise will be at least one hour.
i'm dying dying dying...going deeper, deeper, deeper. not sure what to do!
i cannot seem to eat ordinarily anymore. it's so difficult lately. don't know what to do.
it will HAVE to be mind over matter for me. there's just simply no other way.
You know, i think in some ways i can prove stronger than most people. and that's it - I will have to prove to myself and others this fact just one more time! :)