12pm BIG lunch, ate the whole thing & stuffed my face: banana 120, followed up by a really tasty chocolate protein pancake: egg whites 120, protein powder muffin mix 220, little bit of oats not more than 50, and sf jelly 30, stevia no cal: total around 550. big pancake it was. I was full before finshing, but, wanted to eat the whole thing.
total so far today: 700, and i'm very full.
2:45pm: big plum at least 50 maybe more..
3:45: meal: bacon jerky (lots of salt, but lately it's ok I crave it) 200 and sautéed cabbage 100 at most.
Before gym: drink 50, candy bar 100.
After gym: balanced type of bar (fats, protein, carbs) and lots of seltzer (it's already 8:40pm....) 200 cal.
total cal today: 1400, EXCELLENT. this is because i'm down to the wire, so excited, here come's my sister....I mean, here comes the BRIDE!!!!!!!!!!!! amazing!
I did a lot of laundry even a spring denim jacket this morning and also washed my sheets again (midweek!) trying to take care of my skin and not sleeping on dirty pillows, etc - really trying here!, gym later tonight around 5:30pm, going back to the derm. soon - I have a small pimple that i'm taking care of. I seriously made appts every single day this week - and so far, I've needed them. I am being smart. it isn't obsessive in my opinion for a 33yr old sister of the bride to want to look her best on Friday / Saturday :) at the wedding!
I may stop my caffeine until after wedding, that may help a lot with my skin. but we'll see. I'm not changing my diet. and i'm focusing more on doing less not more (besides the extra derm. visits)
I am definitely not bored staying home. I find things to do everyday that will help me come next Month (April) and beyond. Tomorrow, I'll be getting an oil change and air pressure check of my tires so that my car is reading to go on 4/8 to Atlantic City with my friend Jen! I'll do the driving.
Next, I'll also be putting $ on my laundry card tomorrow (was gonna go today but preferred to come home and chill (hopefully read) before gym. Also tomorrow, i'll be dropping off more health bill copays for reimbursement from my union account. Like I said, i'm FAR from bored. It's so good to have this week home to prepare for the wedding, do all sorts of errands, do some extra laundry so that I don't have to do ANY LAUNDRY on this weekend before work Monday, and just get organized like I said. Feels so nice. And a little downtime. I wrote my speech for my sister which i'll copy-paste maybe tonight. It's short and simple (sorta like me! LOL) and i'm ok with it. I don't want to think about the speech anymore. And i'm happy to be able to enjoy my time at home now, now that I've written a speech at all. I am happy to give myself relaxation now.
And best yet, my boss texted me to tell me his IS PAYING ME for the 5 days I took off this week, as a GIFT! Trust me - I thanked him.
I wasn't supposed to be paid because I used up my vaca already. Now, if that's not a gift, nothing is! now, I will NOT have to spend a lot of my tax return like I thought i'd have to! I will just use it to pay off my credit card (probably use around $1k of my tax return and save the rest. I hope to save around $2k or more - depending how much I get back.
Progress as of today: 2.4 lbs lost so far, only 2.6 lbs to go!
Horn_Of_Plenty - Monday Mar 28, 2016
Happy Monday All.
Early: aminos, kombucha almost 4 cups (needed it since my body is a little wacky right now due to TOM & wedding nerves) 160 cal
Breakfast: banana 120, protein powder 110, egg whites 110, sf jelly & two fish oil pills 50: around 400. good. (and couldn't finish the pancake so i'll have more of it later.) need to buy some bananas and veggies today in the afternoon after a derm. appt.
Late meal / snacks: Bacon Jerky!!!!! saw it & had to try it. This one does have some fat....I got it to fill me up & satisfy me - wow does it! The package has 3 servings & around 350 cals. and I had a little bite of a cookie also. total - at most around 400, good.
around 950 so far, good. 7pm plum 50.
Dinner: will be light....was around 450
1450 today, good.
I actually did a lot of errands today. more than planned. went to the derm. 2x today - because I am NOT kidding you - I got a pimple right on my lip midday! that I didn't have in the AM. I just don't mix with big weddings / events. ....they're not my cup of tea! but, i'll make a good effort with this one for my sister of course. I am thinking to write the speech soon...
To-do today: derm. appt at 12:45 and final dress fitting at 4:30pm. And pick up veggies after the derm. appt. That's it. Believe me, that's totally enough. I'm letting myself have some relax time this week. It's no doubt what I need right now.
After the derm., I stopped by a shoe store (Aerosoles) in the shopping center and found a better shoe for the rehearsal dinner. And it was buy 1, get 1 half off, so I got the shoe in both a black color and a tan color bc I liked it so much. The shoe goes with jeans and dresses. I also did my food shopping for the rest of the week basically. I should be pretty good until this wedding :)
I have to write a wedding rehearsal dinner speech, but not in the right mindset to think about it just right now (although I have ideas floating in & out of my head).
Let's just say, my new digital scale this morning read 114.6!!!!!!!!!! And I checked twice!
The lowest weight i'm comfortable going down to is probably 112. In college, I dropped below 112 for some time (prob around 105-110?) & lost my period for a year.
So this is why I am content on 112 and not going lower. Sorry OR, I know you are a guy, but I needed to write this basically to help myself. Going without a year without a you know what, my health was suffering & I didn't do anything about it. I probably lost a lot of calcium & strength in my bones that year. Being young, I was happy not to have it - and deal with it for awhile, but it was a disservice I did to myself & that's what's probably lead to my injuries as an older adult.
So there! Weight definitely fluctuates day to day - yesterday it read 117. There are NO WORDS for how happy I am to see that #. It shows one thing - my dedication truly paid off. I got to this goal. The scale really did read 115 or lower by the wedding. I achieved the goal - really this time - since mechanical scales are not as accurate & inconsistent compared to the flashing numbers of a digital scale. I'm glad I purchased it. I will probably put the mechanical one away in a closet now.
So, I haven't seen a weight as low as 114.6 since around 2008 in the Fall. Yes, I really remember my highs and lows and when I was having them (my weight I mean - which does pretty much coordinate with also my emotional highs & lows, interestingly). So yeah, Fall 2008 was almost 8 years ago. I did good - achieving this goal again. And it just goes to show - anything is possible if you stay determined & believe in yourself.
After the wedding, I will be relaxing a bit from the gym for a month because I am working to my limit almost right now & am getting the message that my body wants rest only. I will give it what it wants for all of April. I am not a person that enjoys moderation. I don't thrive on moderation. And I never will. So, for me, taking a break doesn't mean a week off or a day off - it means around 1 month off. And if you know me personally, you would know that this is perfect for me. Because I know for a fact, that taking a month off means i'm coming back even more dedicated, eager and ready. Maybe less strong & needing to start off with lower weights, but it will be worth the rest and relaxation I need - as well as more time with friends. I'm taking the break to pursue my other desires. This also includes dating.
Progress as of today: 2.4 lbs lost so far, only 2.6 lbs to go!
Horn_Of_Plenty - Sunday Mar 27, 2016
2-DAY average = 1645 per day. good.
Happy Easter to those celebrating!
TMI but I had the worst PMS mood swings ever the fast few days...and finally TOM with leg thigh cramps. but glad it's now & not at wedding!!!!!!!!
8:30am Breakfast: leftover hibachi from last night and an energy drink. 350.
11:30 Meal: strawberries 100, some salad with dressing 100, beef jerky kick I am on 150 (enjoying the salt and sugar) and the chewy texture. 350 most.
popcorn and kombucha 200
2:30pm late meal (bad thigh cramps today / also some light back pain due to TOM): chips, little bit of turkey, plum 250....and a banana to try to feel better bc these pains are bothering me...120
1270 (may not be a low cal day, too close to wedding anyway to go any more nuts than I already have been.) I may relax a bit today on the food.
Snack before gym: bar and energy drink (yes, I was ultra tired today and gym was the only time I moved around....and this is ok...my body was waiting for this time off!...and i'm giving myself the rest I need. It feels very, very good.) 150 cal.
After gym: protein cookie (high carb, balance of protein and fat) 320
total today: around 1740, good. trying to relax myself - I don't need any more food today. I did great.
Progress as of today: 9 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!
Horn_Of_Plenty - Saturday Mar 26, 2016
I just got my new scale in the mail. I bought it off groupon and it's digital, not mechanical. It's very good & accurate. I'll be following it. No more "guestimating" my weight. Now, it's by the book - by the exact #. I knew I wasn't really ever perfectly 115 lol.
Plans today are very simple: laundry, stay home all daytime, pick my friend up for dinner :) I think hibachi :)
11am Kombucha 150
1:30pm: old brussel sprouts not so good 50, strawberries 50
2:30pm: Huge protein pancake made with egg whites 120, special protein muffin mix 200, sf jelly 30. total here: 350.
oh, and some more beef jerky...weird cravings lately. 100
Out to dinner tonight for tasty hibachi (Japanese where they cook in front of you!) I want to guess around 800-850. I doubt it was too much more.
1550 Saturday :) yay. NO exercise.
Saturday. So peaceful.
I slept around 10 hrs last night, I was so done! I texted my "halfway" boyfriend as I like to call him in the AM yesterday and he didn't get back to me. I didn't really appreciate it. Then, while at the gym yesterday, I texted him again and told him that if he didn't call or text me back, that he wouldn't hear from me again because now he sees how I feel when i'm stressed (wedding stuff). And honestly, the problem was, i'd been wanting to talk to him since Wednesday and, yes, we was literally and honestly busy going to a wake that night...and the next night visiting another friend who's father died....but when we were texting and he said he wasn't stressed about these things, that it's life, and I asked him to then call me Thursday night after he visited his friend, he didn't follow thru. So Friday, I wasn't so happy that he'd "played me" and put me last and essentially followed thru with all his other social and friend obligations except for me. And yes, he celebrates Good Friday and Easter (I don't) so I do know he was with his family last night (and maybe even during the day), but that doesn't give him an excuse not to call me from Wednesday evening thru Friday evening when I actually asked him a few times to do so.
We've known each other 2.5yrs, him and me. And we've stated in touch by phone text and calls for two years. He has no excuse whatsoever. Even friends will call each other, especially when a friend is asking because she sounds like she need your support. He disregarded my feelings, when I told him I was upset about something at work, and didn't even care to help me and rather totally put his own interests first. This shows me that he's not caring about me even as a friend like he should. He has no consideration for me if he is going to act this way. And, I said him a few lasts texts even after telling him I wouldn't text him again. The reason I followed up by texting again is simple. I was fuming mad after my workout and the caffeine I had before it. And I needed to tell him my real feelings which are this: I am sick of having a "halfway relationship" with him and will not stand for it anymore. I am more than pissed at myself (bc the thing is, I can't be angry at a man that never said it was anything more...that never tried to play me....that just went along with it....with my texts...I actually can't say i'm angry at him....so, I told him I was annoyed and angry with myself for continuing on this thing I have with him. And I told him that I don't want it halfway anymore and can't. I ended saying "I am F*ucking Pissed." that was my last sentence to him. He did write a few texts later that night following up and, yes, he did get back to me. But, he didn't ask me questions. All his texts were statements. So, I was still fuming and not ready to write back so I didn't. I plan to write back to him the wedding night. to text him a photo of me all dressed up. Maybe even at the rehearsal dinner.
I do love this man. Despite what others say, I love him. I will have a broken heart if he really doesn't step it up to allow himself to be in an emotional and real relationship with me. I love his personality and i'm attracted to him 100%. I love his work ethic and his mannerisms. I am in love with his quirks too.
When he wrote back, it didn't really make full sense. He still held back from anything truly emotional. he is very closed up and has sincere troubles with anything relationship-like. If he can't ask me out. If he doesn't want to be my boyfriend, I'm going to have to move forward and it's very difficult for me to do if I have to. I have fallen for him, he doesn't know this. he doesn't know that I already love him. he doesn't really know that I loved him at first sight. I've never said the word love to him and never will until long after we were to "really" date. He always tells me where he is and what he's doing. But, if I cannot be the one finally out with him and being with him in person, then, I have to let him go from my mind and continue my life without him. It will break my heart. Because I already love him and it's been this way for awhile. I care for him very much. He does know I would go out of my way to see him and for him. He never told me "no" or stop texting me. He's never told me that he wasn't interested in me. So, I don't know. he's 44, single, never married, no kids.
The people he goes out with are his guy friends and when he gets together with big groups, the girls are sometimes still in their 20's. He jokes and tells me it's for fun and that he wouldn't really want to date a 20-something girl. Well, I'm 33 and he's 44....and I only prefer older men with more maturity. I tend to get along better with older men and not men my age. In general, I can't connect as well to men my age. Everything about him works with me. And he knows I feel this way. I've hinted a thousand times at it.
But if he cannot find a way to fit me into his actual life, it has to be over. It's so sad. You have no idea. So I told him I want the real deal. I don't know what he'll say. It's so darn emotional this stuff, it had me fuming. And I totally tired myself out last night and fell asleep 10 hours at least (took a sleeping pill on top of being exhausted). I need my extra sleep this week to boost my endurance and ability to feel resting leading into the wedding 4/2 and rehearsal dinner 4/1. Sleeping pills have been my savior this winter. Allowing me to sleep during the weeknights and sleep in when I need to on weekends.
Progress as of today: 8.4 lbs lost so far, only 2.6 lbs to go!
Horn_Of_Plenty - Friday Mar 25, 2016
9pm Update. Busy Day. Can't even fathom talking about it. but will try to remember everything I ate / drank:
Kombucha around 150
Total Above: 500
Israeli Salad (contains some dressing) 200, turkey 150, seltzer, 350.
Plum 50, granola bar 100, drink 50 200.
Late Meal: sautéed bean sprouts with some other veggies 150, too much beef jerky 200, seltzer. around 350-400.
total today; 1450. good.
Good exercise also.
Good Morning Everyone :)
Happy Good Friday to those celebrating.
I took the day off today (all unpaid now until April 1st) to relax, chill, go to my Tax Preparer & find a hair accessory for my sister's wedding. I want a hairpiece to attach to my own hair probably like a bun, but it's a lot of hair so it looks like I have more hair. Not trying to be fake with it, more that I want it to look pristine...I went it to help me look beautiful and natural, not spoiled & trashy.
I did ask my coworker turned great friend (known her around 3 years) to help me Saturday but I know she's busy already although she said yes to help me, but I do feel bad, so I want to do the work on my own today & maybe show her photos of what I find. I can even call her while she's at work while i'm at the store with the hairpieces.
I am also going to my accountant to get my taxes done. It will be great to receive that check, pay off the few charges but more than usual unpaid stuff on my credit card around $1,000 due to more spending (on purpose) knowing that I'd be able to use some of my tax refund. I spend money recently for a trip to AC with Jen from work, a concert in June with Christine my best friend, and also general stuff leading up to this wedding spending. All worth it. More visits to dermatologist also - those copays and a therapy / dr copay. All to be easily paid off. no worries. I never get into problems with debt thankful for this. I know my limits - but took advantage of life & knowing a tax refund would help me live it up a little & giving myself a major break & relaxing about it. Sorry, I have to be able to put it into perspective for myself and you guys.
I am having lots of mixed emotions lately as the wedding / rehearsal dinner is one week away. I am thinking of my own friends / love life too / family. Just everything is coming up. Doesn't help that it's that "TOM" emotional time of month soon either ! LOL.
All in all, I'm happy. I'm thankful. And I'm proud of myself. thankful for my friends and family. and looking forward to having a good, productive week. Cheers.
Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
Horn_Of_Plenty - Thursday Mar 24, 2016
Wednesday Cals: only 1250, no breakfast or snacks in AM due to sitting in a meeting = great change of pace! perfect for my wedding prep right now!
5-day cal average per day: 1520 per day = excellent.
It's already Thursday Morning...I was busy yesterday enough not to write an entry...
But also, we had a VERY BIG and IMPORTANT and also SERIOUS meeting at work yesterday. Everyone at my company will be soon trained thru this 2.5 hour COMPLIANCE meeting. So, no more logging onto DD while at work :(. I probably would NOT get in a big trouble, but it's not worth it. So now, if I were to log in, it would be thru my cell phone and obviously not as good for commenting on your diaries which i'd probably just do at home & i'll prob resort to writing down my calculations on a desktop word program & deleting every day what I write but actually deleting every word....yeah. and also by using my post-it notes. I've been using post-its already multiple years while at this job to keep track of what i'm eating, especially if it's different or unplanned from what I thought it would be yadda yadda yadda....
sucks that there's so many rules at work for computer use because let me tell you: sitting in front of a computer for 8 hrs is a killer. and doing mind-numbing work for 8hrs is a killer!
Oh! and guess what!? there's a new rule at my company - we aren't allowed to be paid OT!!!!!!!!! Therefore, I don't have to work it anymore!!!!!!!!!!! wahooo!!!!!!!!!!! My boss did something as$hole-ish: he had me work an hour OT on Tuesday before I knew this rule & then said to me: "Jackie, you won't get rich off an hour anyway." !!! don't worry, this will NOT happen again & I wasn't angry because Monday I did leave early for Dr so it's like I was making up time for Monday. ....
Lots of stress at my company and lots of rules. Things are changing for the worse. It makes me want to run out of there as fast as possible. I will really work on preparing myself for the NYPD starting with preparing in May. (April is a rest month & break for me - I need it).
Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
Horn_Of_Plenty - Tuesday Mar 22, 2016
4-day avg: 1587 per day. This is very good.
dinner: lots of sautéed bean sprouts around 100? beef jerky yeah been eating this a lot around 110, some chips ...160 total dinner I'll just say 400.
With hair blow-dried (not wet and heavy) and pooped everything out after 3 cups kombucha, sorry tmi, somewhere 115point something on my mechanical scale!!! I did it!!!!!! Nailed it!!! And by wedding it will stay 115 or less by then yes did it nailed It :) so proud of myself!!!!
So what are my goals for the next week and a half? Keep cals low. Find a hairpiece for my hair at wedding, confirm with style team that they can do my hair with it..
Keep cals LOW...lol, needed to repeat this.
One last dress fitting with adjustments if I want to...I don't care what they say! prob not needing to make any more changes to the dress - I hope I don't have to, actually.
...keeping to my new calorie levels after wedding but a break when partying in AC...the following Friday after the wedding on 4/2 lol....crazy!? can't believe I told my friend yes to going that weekend! LOL should be fun! and going to indulge in drinking!
...then....full swing gear relax in April
....then thinking and acting towards getting myself into the Academy and maybe in January 2017 instead of July 2017. But if July, it's not a big deal in the least....but January would be better to get out of this job sooner rather than later...only if I am physical ready. And if i'm not physically ready in January 2017, I'll be more than ready come July.
I tend to push myself too hard past my limit, so i'll need to hold back if anything. Upper body training will be REDUCED no matter what, and lower body will focus on strengthening. Not too much focus will be spend on cardio still.
I plan to write a lot about the NYPD and my goals in my entries starting prob in May i'll start writing more about it. to keep my focus up. There's no stopping now, I'm on my way! Just let's get this wedding out of the way!
Progress as of today: 11 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
Horn_Of_Plenty - Monday Mar 21, 2016
1616 3-day avg
I am very high on life & very focused on gearing up for my sister’s wedding. Feeling sure of myself, strong, focused and determined!
Home: kombucha 130 and aminos.
Work: very small banana 100, bar 150 (only counting what I could finish….i am SO IN WEDDING MODE RIGHT NOW, life is GREAT). 250
Snacking before lunch: prob coffee with milk 80, but not much & bar 170 or so. 230. 80
Lunch: change of plans: egg white omelette with veggies 200 most and lots of veggies on side 150 most, maybe avocado….toast with butter but not big slices 150-200 550 absolute MOST.
coming home from dr: i'll have fruit and flavored water 100
Dinner: TBD...do brussel sprouts really have 80 calories per cup!? that's too much, gotta google this again...anyways, if they do, I had around 300 cals of them, 100 in turkey jerky, and 100 in chips. and fish oil pills, not gonna count that.
around 1600, more than I wanted, but still low...gotta look up the Brussels again. but at least 1600 might be an overestimate by as much as 100 cals. :)
OMG Happy Monday! Last Monday till my week off. So happy! I did great. And almost thru my cold! Feeling so happy. Leaving work early today to go to my psychologist / therapist. Gonna speak to them about how I can continue to feel good thru this week & next and the wedding AND especially after everything's done & when I have to go back to work when I sense I may have a hard time. I am happy I chose to take a week off, knowing it will do me some good. I'll be busy enough, prepping for wedding - going to probably my last dress fitting. And just sleeping in I would think! LOL. and maybe hairdresser to ask about getting extensions...LOL. I have thin hair, not a lot of it, I want to wear it up, would look nice with more hair...we'll see. prob not gonna do it.
Having the week off will make exercise easier to fit in, too. It will make everything more manageable & not rushed. And, after my last bout of time off that ended mid-October, this week off comes almost at the 6-month mark from then. I feel it's well-deserved! More like 5.5 months. PRETTY GOOD job to me, especially considering the last time I took off, it was due to being so stressed that it caused me a lot of trouble. i'm not going into it, but if you look at my entries from mid-September thru mid October, you'd be able to read just how bad I was feeling. hope to NEVER experience that emotional / mental pain ever again - it was very, very scary.
So, all in all, I'm proud of myself & feeling great. Happy about putting in the work all winter & now going to show it off at her wedding. I did great. I'm proud of myself. Still around 117lbs, sometimes 116. I'll be 115 by the wedding no doubt, I'd like to say right now.
Wishing everyone a wonderful day. I am here to say & prove to you and myself one thing: ANYTHING you want for yourself is POSSIBLE. You only need to stick with your goals, nevergive up.
Progress as of today: 10 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!
Horn_Of_Plenty - Sunday Mar 20, 2016
8:30am 100 cal
10:30am banana 120
11:30am bar 220
3pm on way home from mall: plum 60
Late lunch around 3:45pm: tons of cooked veggies but low cal ones with the lightest sauce ever (hardly any sauce) 250 at most. the place I like to stop at had tons of extra veggies that they usually don't have - selection was amazing for the prepared stuff - so I bought extra as it's my last busy week before I take a week off before the wedding. So yea, i'm going to do WHATEVER I can to make the week as smooth as possible and make sure I have enough veggies so I can eat till i'm content and manage my weight for these last two weeks! And actually, it's now under two weeks. SO EXCITING. I cannot wait to put on my dress :) and then some turkey jerky not that great. 160 and now gonna have flavored seltzer with stevia and chill out before gym which i'm going to at 6pm today.
total so far: around 900...gonna be good today, keep it def no more than 1500.
before gym: fiber one bar & caffeine 200
After gym: Snookerdoodle Protein Cookie (hi carb, mod protein, mod fat) 360
total today: around 1450 - super duper.
2-day average = 1625/day. good.
I am def in wedding mode (even though i'm a bridesmaid, not a bride) and I am eager to look WONDERFUL in my dress. I had the last fitting today & made sure to tighten it up!!!!!!!!!!!!! So, it's SUPER important for me to stick to my guns and do what I need to in order for this dress to look ABSOLUTELY the way I want it to on me. I am SO SO SO SO SO SO happy already based on the fitting today. :)
My plan is to do my own approach until wedding. After it, I ordered some things like a "3-day refresh," but I will NOT be using anything new before wedding since I know my approach of calorie counting is what works. So, I'm going to go with the foods I like & do what I like (I think) until wedding. Just 4 days of work this week, then i'm finally off to get my tax filing done...and any little prep I need to do before wedding :) wedding 4/2 - yay!
My plan is to stay around this amount of calories Monday & Tuesday. Next gym session is NOT until Wednesday :)
Plans for today: dress fitting at noon, pick up food for week & lunch, come home 7 eat, read more, / relax, go to gym, dinner. :)
Stayed at mall MUCH longer than expected - like 2 hours more than I thought I would. But worth it because mom was with me & I found the last item that I needed - black shoes to go with my dress for the rehearsal dinner. Reason I needed so much for this wedding in the first place is because I didn't own any dresses (or rather any dress I did own at home was NOT purchased within the past 5 years!). so yeah, it was ok to buy a dress for the bridal shower, rehearsal dinner, and wedding. I had borrowed my mom's shoes for the bridal shower. And now I have a pair of comfortable, lower heals, that I bought on sale for $60 that are HIGH QUALITY and that I can even wear with jeans. They go with everything. So this is great! I'll wear them at the rehearsal dinner too & my ankle and feet won't be crying after. I cannot wear high heals anymore - I have too many issues and it's NOT worth messing around when what I want is NYPD.
Proud of myself for yesterday's activities (20 min walk, reading, resting, internet stuff, going though some heath bills, signing up for an online weight/health challenge group with friends I know from college, laundry, taking care of myself and being lazy) / rest / calories / not overindulging when I wasn't hungry / taking a sleeping pill and getting good sleep leading into today.
I am rested from last night, feel good although still keeping into consideration that I must continue to try to rest when I can this week & keep getting better. Bad cold is just about over thankfully - but I will need to continue getting good sleep this week to kick it to the curb. !!! And I will. Wedding in just under 2 weeks now! And to top it off, I am going to Atlantic City the following weekend for one night with a friend to party at a pool party there at night mostly, and walk around & see the place! So cool!! AC is my party to celebrate the end of winter / end of wedding stuff / and live up my life for a night!
And after the wedding & AC, I am starting to line up a few things to do in Spring so that life stays happy & interesting. When things get too boring & static, I get depressed. I enjoy change in my life - and by doing new things here & there, I will be able to keep the positivity up.
Other things planned:
April: Brooklyn Botanical Gardens - Cherry Blossom Festival end of April either a Saturday or Sunday whatever my friends can do!
May: Mother's Day (a given to see my folks!), and maybe end of May will be maybe a small trip to New Hope, PA on Memorial Day weekend!, or just relax in May....no worries. tired thinking about it all...
June 8th: A Wednesday night! i'm going to a concert at 6pm (going to work that day & still going to work the next day because it's such an early concert starting 6pm and it's so close to where I live!) that's literally in my backyard only 15 min away in Queens at Citi Field Met's Stadium - Beyoncé!!!! so cool!. I'm going with my best friend Christine (we are getting along better now thankfully!) and i'll pick her up from the train after work & drop her off after the concert. Works out really nicely!) and of course Father's Day, a given with my family.
July 9th: My friend Bill is coming down from Canada to visit and we'll go to NYC for a show, maybe see my other friends & introduce him, and also bring him to a really cool beach.!!!
So, there are nice plans with friends for sure in the spring & summer. Happy about this. Very happy. I plan to live it up a bit this summer, taking my new days as I please but within reason. I may go on a trip come December 2016 or Februrary 2017 depending where i'm at work-wise and job-wise.! If I do a trip, it would be a cruise probably or trip to Vegas (which is unfortunately so much more expensive but I might...)
Progress as of today: 10 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!
Horn_Of_Plenty - Saturday Mar 19, 2016
Plans for today: staying home, not going out / getting dressed in street clothes, and doing laundry downstairs still in my apt building. happy to be home & be home ALL day. reading / relaxing / maybe a walk around the building actually - if I feel up to it later. but for now, resting. getting over being sick. happy to have a rest day. was waiting for it!
Last week was a challenge, but I got through it. I even finished with a gym session last night but tried my best not to do a couple exercises that involve basically only the shoulder. I will continue my gym sessions thru the end of this month but will be taking extra care in dealing with my shoulder. And after the wedding, I resolve to take around 3-4 weeks off from the gym (or I will go but not work out intensely / not worry about missing days here & there).
In May, i'll be back at it in full swing. I want to have a nice beach body come summer! but, i'm going to change around my gym routine a bit in May - for more lower & less upper body I think. From May onward, my real challenge is nota beach body really at all. My focus will be on strengthening my lower body & getting into the NYPD. That will be my main focus & hard work will be put in!
...Dedication like nothing you've ever seen. Yup. I will not be done after the wedding, rather i'll be just starting & changing my total focus. Gym sessions will prob be shorter. and possibly more often. Like, 1 day legs, 1 day upper. now I do everything same day...i'll work it out. But a change is coming in May. These changes are on purpose to live healthier & workout smarter. To help me sleep better & live better. I need to make some changes to my gym workouts. So, when I join my new gym, I'll start over a little bit! different goals.
Today so far: 8am: aminos in water 30, Kombucha 70. 100.
9:30-10:15am: spread-out breakfast: some roasted cabbage in some oil 100 at most, some cauliflower roasted with nuts & small pieces fruit 200 most, and a health salad in some oil / vinegar prob around 150 most. oh, and leftover beef jerky 50, and some chips 100! - total here: 600, good.
total so far: 700, good, balanced. now I'm happy I have my seltzer!
12:30 big, satisfying meal: lots of cooked veggies with oil 200, then a microwave Smart Ones mac & cheese 300 mixed into cooked cabbage 50, and a drink 50. total: 600 and satisfying!
1300 :)..sometimes it's best to rest and not totally eat the minimum. Planning for around 1800 today.
2:30 fruit and chips 160
4:30 fruit and bar 300
1750..rest day...its ok...50 after my walk - had another plum. lots of fruit today. :) two plums, and lots of strawberries throughout the day.
total today for saturday: 1800 and losing my appetite a bit - now it's 7pm. just thirsty for plain water at the moment & very tired.
Its almost 9pm and took a sleeping pill just now. deciding kitchen is closed for today. Dress Fitting tomorrow which may be the last. However, I do plan to go back, myself without my mom, the week before the wedding to be sure that I don't want any more alterations.!!! I want to look as good as I can, the end.
I did end up going for a 20 or 30min walk. not sure what it came to. was a good idea. but i'm overall very tired. just need extra rest right now. beginning to feel a lot better, but just need rest...whatever, i'll just rest a bit during the week leading up to the wedding since i'm taking off those days I do plan to lay low and enjoy some nice, quiet, care-free personal time. I'll catch up with things that need catching up with & also be relaxing a lot at home like I did today. and do things at a slower, relaxed pace - very much including sleeping in that week. :)
It's a full rest day, not upset for staying in all day. I was waiting for this opportunity since Monday. I don't even want to walk outside. No cares. Just want to be home all day & loving this freedom to stay inside. I may change my mind later just to move around for a few minutes, but overall, i'm staying home. No driving no matter what. No food shopping. Nothing beyond walking around the block a lil bit! So nice to have the freedom to relax & rest.
Progress as of today: 10 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!