home
forums directory search about DD
Sign-in or Join for Free!
Recent Diary Entries
BearCountryGG 11:27A
Horn_Of_Plenty 11:00A
InnerPeace 10:49A
graindart 8:13A
pinklatte 6:33A
happy-1 2:24P
Donkey 9/18
Maria7 9/16
legcramps 8/31
smilewithkatie 5/28
Puddles 5/18
Duaa123. 5/03
52LivingLife 4/16
Jayhawkjen 4/14
trishpiglet3 4/12
thinkpositive 3/21
onceagain 2/01
KathyBlue 1/08
xanthe 11/28
jazzstorie 11/27
Cybermom4 10/31
jabockov 10/06
biscottibody59 9/12
tgshare 8/16
mylilsista 8/10

Recent Forum Topics
DD Future - 2017 - 12:34P 30-Apr

My First time! - 6:19P 7-Mar

Can't post replies to journal posts - 2:14P 17-Sep

WEBMASTER: Replies to comments on diary - 6:16P 12-Jul

DD Maintenance - 05/14/2015 - 2:52A 25-Jul

Shoes - 4:55P 19-Nov

view happy-1 bio page
happy-1 - Tuesday May 15, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 224.3

No weigh in. Can't take it today... Date last night was soul-killing on a meta level. I don't think guys really check out profiles. I could tell as soon as I walked up that he was startled by my height, or maybe my pictures from a couple of months ago aren't current anymore.... but I am only 5lbs lighter and my hair is the same so go figure... I went along to be polite, but knew he wanted out. He was shocked when I asked for separate checks... I guess women don't do that... I said I thought it's just a hello, I'm sorry I didn't realize it was a date... I don't expect anything from a first meetup.... Like if you have a decent conversation maybe then you go on a date. I guess I just get really nervous meeting new people and I need some time to warm up and I try not to put any extra pressure on myself. We had a nice enough conversation. He's in his 40s, skinny, withdrawn. He said he used to be an alcoholic and weighed 200lbs, but fixed that by switching to caffeine-free diet coke. Apparently he also used to hang out at the drag-racing circuit. There's something about the sobered up party boys that just isn't any fun. They are kind of flat somehow.

Anyway this morning I sent "Hey! It was good to meet you. It kind of seemed like you didn't think I matched my profile. So that I can do better, would you mind giving me a couple of tips on what either didn't match or what I could do better?"

No answer. Crickets.

---

 

---

After I got home from my date last night, I tried to wash mybig 5 day cooler out in the tub. It slipped and knocked me on the bridge of my nose. My eyes are puffy but no black bruises. I got lucky with my lucky shot. Killer headache though. All I can think about is how bad I wish I had a gel eye mask. I have ice packs but something I can just tie on and hold in place...

---


 

---

Up: ? I had a hard time getting out of bed.

? - coffee w vanilla coffeemate creamer. Need to hit grocer. Prepped oatmeal but can't get head around eating it.

? - 2 cheese quesedillas, water.

1:20ish - Burrito bowl (homemade) before 1:30pm phone screen.

 

Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 05/15/2018:
That's too bad that the meet up didn't workout....there is a lot of pressure on everyone in the online dating world...My oldest son tried eharmony...and a friend did also...and they were both relieved when their 10 dates were over...neither one met anyone there that worked out.

Hope you don't get black eyes...that would be the pits.


Donkey on 05/15/2018:
I'm sorry the "date" was a bust. I do like your approach of just a meet-up and THEN a date if the guy makes the cut. Nothing wrong with that!

Along with Bear, I hope you don't get a black eye :-( That would be rather depressing... on top of depressing. :-(


horn_of_plenty on 05/16/2018:
that's kind you asked for separate checks so he didn't have to pay if you say he just wanted out?

sorry you had to sit thru the date...this is why i don't really date or even make time for it. it's not fun for me!

however, if i were dating a lot, i wouldn't mind the guy paying???? why don't you just save your cash if you date a lot!?

happy-1 on 05/16/2018:
I don't want to feel like I owe a guy anything. I feel like if they pay I'm obligated... It's not the same after 40... They really expect something out of you.



happy-1 - Monday May 14, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 224.3

Back up to 226. Normal weight fluctuation after weight loss, but it still made me sad. Still, I ate more or less on track yesterday and made a point to start my day off well, and last night I set myself up for success today with overnight oats and coffee all set up to go. I also made dog food for the week and washed most of the dishes.

Today I will do my hair and makeup and otherwise get date-ready then head down to my favorite Corner Bakery to do homework before I go meet a guy off JustOKcupid. He picked a beach bar and grill at 7 which sounds fun. Might go a little early to catch sunset.

---

I liked the meu daily challenge... would love to know how you would answer it... "Name 1 healthy activity that you do to help manage stress.. List one healthy activity that you do to minimize or manage stress in your life. Here are a few to get you started: take a walk, knit, jog, play with a pet, soak in a bubble bath, clean, or hug a friend. For most people, there's no way around having at least some stress. But having healthy ways to counteract it can make all the difference! When we take part in activities that we like, it helps to boost our endorphins, feel-good chemicals that our bodies make naturally. When you're distracted and doing something you like, it's also harder to worry about things that might be stressing you out, another bonus. Celebrities who have publicly proclaimed their love for knitting include Meryl Streep, Cameron Diaz, and Russell Crowe."

My answer was: "This is easy, dog walks. Sometimes I am too stressed to go, and I forget that it actually helps... but I go and I enjoy the walk by watching my dog enjoy the walk and all my stress slides off and I am free to tackle the things that make me stressed. I also journal daily in an online journal."

---

Today a recruiter asked "What have you done since the layoff at ****** company?" I said a stupid answer.... "Since ****** closed their North American office and did the layoff, I have done a contract at **** (BA/QA Analyst) and I am currently in a QA class at *******. I also have taken up hiking/HITT workouts and lost 92lbs... Not sure if that's relevant to their question, but it's what I have been doing while looking for work. I go to a bootcamp up in ****** and do the online challenge."

No answer. Crickets.

---

Bouncing back from the bad answer I sent the recruiter by booking spots on two group car  camping trips... Idywild and Death Valley. Get me out of here and out in nature before I explode!

Both are in September... But mentally I am already there.

---

6am - oatmeal, coffee

Spaced out and missed 2 meals

3pm - burrito bowl w chicken thigh, beans, brown rice, cheese, avocado

4pm - protein cookie

5:50 - Rotisserie chicken mom brought home... snuck some to my dog and she is rewarding me by sleeping on my feet. Aaaaaaah.... warm doggie fur.

8:30pm - cheeseburger lettuce wrap, a couple of sweet potato fries, but I brought most of them home to eat later today

10:30pm - post-nightmare-date-binge: 2 cheese quesedillas, caramel trail mix, dark chocolate cherries, a mint smart-ice-cream pop. My emotions: A lot of self-pity, bottomless-pit-loneliness, hopelessness, rejection, desperation, and self-hatred.

Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 05/14/2018:
Some times it takes up to 4 days to see a scale change.......you ate salt....it is probably just water.

I vote for a Epsom salt bath......

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
Yes... with lavender oil. Or just a ton of water!

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
I mean drink a ton of water


Donkey on 05/14/2018:
My healthy activity to reduce stress is to walk.

Your weigh-in really spoke to me. That's EXACTLY how I feel. I know it's normal, but when the numbers go up, it's so disheartening.

I hope you have a nice date tonight.

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
TY! Wearing a nice handkerchief dress I got at a yard sale. Good to put it into use!


Donkey on 05/14/2018:
PS I love your answer to the recruiter!!!

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
Yeah I had all these plans for my time off but I made fitness a priority... and that's all I am accomplishing and that is even a daily fight. I am pretty stoked to be looking at size 14/16s at Ann Taylor and Banana Republic, even though I am on a NY&Co budget!


Horn_of_plenty on 05/14/2018:
speaking of packing your bike for next time, Queens sucks. I already have a flat tire and used my bike approx 3-4 times total :-( i think there are special tire tubes that cannot be punctured as easily by nails...

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
Or you can just put green slime from the auto store in them so they self seal as you roll. Slows you down a little but easy fix.


horn_of_plenty on 05/15/2018:
so frustrating, my breaks are also way too noisy like an 18 wheeler, so going back to the repairman this weekend.

happy-1 on 05/15/2018:
Augh, find a bicycle repair workshop where you learn how to do your own repairs. What part of NY are you in.



happy-1 - Sunday May 13, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 224.3

Weight loss!!!! About a pound? How is that possible since this past week I ate 4 pizzas, tons of protein ice cream, bag of tortillas, milk chocolate, and otherwise went to hell with myself?

I guess it's the puppy diet.

---

Fitbit says I did an average 7 miles a day last week... just in the living room

---

My dog is soo happy to be home. So much less shedding and so chill. She started rattling my dad's dog gate this morning and I gave her a cbd oil treat and she chilled out and is flopped over at my feet. Oh I hope I have a solution to the crazy ocd gate rattling... omg.

---

I liked the daily challenge on meu today.... write down 5 things that make you happy. "Whether browsing the bookstore's new arrivals or planting your favorite flowers, no activity is too small to be on your happiness list. List five favorite activities, and if you like, you can make a date with yourself to do one of them this week. Research shows that you can learn to be happier and more satisfied with your life, even if you're not someone who usually looks on the bright side. By writing a list of things that make you happy, you bring attention to the positive aspects of your life."

Mine are: 1. Dog sitting. Love the challenge of combining my dog with another dog and the mental challenge of figuring out that dog.

2. Trying a new recipe. Mental challenge of making something new.

3. Filling out my habit tracking worksheets. Feeling "on track".

4. Snorkeling, bodyboarding, paddleboarding.

5. Bicycling.

---

After the hassle of 6 different stores to find my mom a good lounge dress, I am glad I picked the navy blue one with flamingos from Pennys. My mom loves it, she looks great, I should have gotten two... And most importantly it is long enough so I never have to see where I came from again!

---

11 - B - protein cookie, the kitchen was too messy for making food

Didn't eat... was digging things out, trying to put things right. Got too hungry, ran out for a burger.

3pm - L - double cheeseburger lettuce wrap, sweet potato fries, ranch dressing

6:30pm - two whole wheat quesedillas, stevia punch

7:30 pm - salad, yam, chicken thighs, water.

10pm - 3 cups broccoli with too much irish butter but it was yum

All day - tons of frozen yogurt because... um... hungry... and probiotic.

Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 05/13/2018:
Congrats on the loss....!!!! No matter how surprised you were...those kinds of losses are even more fun!!! Happiness can come in all size packages....

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
Ty! A pound of fat would be a big package though!


Donkey on 05/13/2018:
That's a good idea, listing 5 things that make me happy. Now you've got me thinking...

WTG on the lost pound :-)

happy-1 on 05/13/2018:
What's your list of 5 things?


bearcountrygg on 05/14/2018:
Great gift choice!!!

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
She wants another one for her birthday, lol. Sometimes I get it right!

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
And she knew I had bought her one a week ago and was after me for a week to return it!

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
But also super proud of myself for having an entire solved and ready before I left on vacation for a week. I bought dinner ingredients for Mothers day on sale a whole week ahead and just had to pull them out while I cleaned up!


Horn_of_plenty on 05/14/2018:
Nice job on the loss...maybe it was a lot of exercise when you went walking with the dogs???

Also, what made you go off plan to eating pizzas and stuff? Did you not have enough food where you were staying or just eating for comfort since you were a little homesick? Maybe next time bring seltzers with sweetener or some other low cal option that'll keep you from bingeing! That's what i did this weekend, lots of low cal drinks to keep my mouth busy. but accidentally still overate on one of the days because not enough veggies there and it was buffet style but with servers so it was hard to limit what i ate...also so much good food, it was hard to turn to everything!

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
The dog walks are factored into that stat, but we didn't go that far... He has long legs for a bull dog but he's pretty fat and out of shape. It was mostly chasing after that puppy because he wanted attention, or he was hassling my dog, or he wanted something lost under the couch, or he thought his mom and dad were hiding in the bedroom, or my dog said he was going to pee, or he did pee on something and I had to clean up, or he peed on me, or he wanted out but wouldn't go unless I went with him... or he wanted a treat so I made him do treats. All those steps to chase after him added up. Fitbit says I was active almost every hour he wasn't crated... I had to crate him a couple of times because I was going to lose my mind... but by Friday he was this calm dog and I could pull my brain together. But I am so glad it was that I was actually just super active and not that I am old, fat, sick, and nearly dead. I was freaking out that I am really out of shape or kidney issues are cropping up if just sitting in a new living room makes me that tired. I should have thought to synch my fitbit while I was there.

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
Oops, i mean he wanted treats so I made him do tricks

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
I went off plan even though I had the right foods because I was trying to conserve cooler space for extra ice and didn't pack individual meals... I packed them closely as ingredients. I was just so tired and hungry all the time I couldn't organize my brain cells to make food and when I did I made such a mess it was overwhelming. Plus having two dogs freak out everytime I ate made me dread eating... and I was homesick... so I just had to have pizza.

I go back for memorial day so I will make a meal plan/active plan and start setting meals up ahead of time for that weekend... like veggie pho with shiritaki noodles will be easier if I make recipe starter ice cubes up with ginger, garlic, and scallion whites ahead of time. I saw a "just crack an egg" product for making omlettes I can totally rip off and stash omlette ingredients as single servings to dump in a bowl and heat with an egg. I can make turkey chilli ahead and freeze. I already make up morning oatmeal packets ahead once a month. I do need time away so I will look online and make a list of places to try for burgers instead of hitting the same junky place each time.

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
And I will definitely try your seltzer trick! I like that idea!

happy-1 on 05/14/2018:
I might also call a fitness place I spotted and ask if I can buy a 3 day pass. I might also pack my bike.



happy-1 - Saturday May 12, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 225.5

Back home. Walked through the door and was shocked at how much work there is to do. Super tired.

Progress as of today: 91.5 lbs lost so far, only 19.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 05/13/2018:
Awww......Hugs!

happy-1 on 05/13/2018:
Ty

happy-1 on 05/13/2018:
Ty


Donkey on 05/13/2018:
Well... that kind of sucks? (((hugs))) Maybe it just means that you were missed while you were gone :-)

happy-1 on 05/13/2018:
More like they missed their servant while I was gone.



happy-1 - Friday May 11, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 225.5

One foot in front of the other. Leaving dog sitting tomorrow. This morning the puppy was super calm and acted like a full grown up dog. I was actually worried he might be sick. Just calm. I wws able to take a hot bath, shave my legs, blow dry my hair, trim my bangs, mani pedi, put on makeup, make breakfast, pull together laundry, and check email. Aaaaah.

Hormones made me eat a pizza, hershey's kisses, two diet cokes, and tortilla chips yesterday. I haven't worked out all week. This is why I'm fat.

Hopefully I can pull my energy together so I can be fat but have finished homework... priorities.

Progress as of today: 91.5 lbs lost so far, only 19.5 lbs to go!

Donkey on 05/11/2018:
Oh those hormones -- very dangerous things. (I'm totally serious.) Can't tell you how many times I've gone off the deep end because of hormones....

Pizza sounds so good right now - and I just finished dinner, LOL. Hope it was an exciting pizza, at least.

happy-1 on 05/11/2018:
I full on channel Satan.

happy-1 on 05/11/2018:
It was a delicious mom n pop joint and I had pepperoni mushroom. I had to fight the puppy for it.


bearcountrygg on 05/12/2018:
That puppy is going to really miss you!!!

happy-1 on 05/12/2018:
Ha. His pack is home. I won't even rank.


Maria7 on 05/12/2018:
Hope you are having a good day. :-)

happy-1 on 05/13/2018:
Hugs! I am!



happy-1 - Thursday May 10, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 225.5

1.5 days of dog sitting after today. I overslept this morning after a long night. I had to take my laundry home wet because I got hit on by weird dudes at the coin op (I think it was the tight t shirt, tight jeans, general vibe of borderline nervous breakdown that inspired that "rescue" thing dudes do... but they were weird and I was miserable and it was awkward) so that took forever. Plus as soon as I put a fresh blanket down for the puppy, he peed on it... ugh!!! BUT the pack walk really chilled him out yesterday. He can't go far or fast but he visibly de-stresses as he goes and is super attentive and "tuned in". I can even give him a bear hug, pull him onto my lap for cuddles and zerberts and he's a happy cuddlebuddy... normally I have. He's got super long legs for a bulldog and he loves a walk. I was super impressed with him because we saw german shepherds and they went ape**** and he and my dog just stood there completely chill and were like, "What's your prob? This is communiyy space buddy. Chill!" No lunging or barking back. Perfect manners. I can't believe that was only his second one. He still steers like a buick but he's learning to stay on my left and not cross over. Everytime he sees grass he flops over in it and rolls. I also lucked into a new green halter and light up orange LED leash/collar (to go with her "I know I look like a coyote but I'm a dog so don't shoot me" light up orange safety vest) at the 99cent store, so even though we left late and took forever we were safe heading back in the dark. She was all lit up like a parade and eay to see. I might head back there today to see if I can get more of those leashes and add more lights to her vest... maybe make a cross "x" for my back.

Lots of homework today. But I think I can fit in some pool time! It only took a few days of decompression to be vacation-ready/crack-the-doggy-code and there's still 48 hours left for it to be fun.

Progress as of today: 91.5 lbs lost so far, only 19.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 05/10/2018:
You sure have interesting days!!!! :)

happy-1 on 05/10/2018:
I think it's just how I write them up


Horn_of_plenty on 05/11/2018:
you are so good to the doggies. the puppy probably never gets as good as walk without you !!! that may be one reason she loves it...and she's maybe calmer bc she can't overact as her energy is spent walking ???

i agree with BCGG, you have very active, interesting days!...and it's not how you write them up...they are unique.

happy-1 on 05/11/2018:
Aw ty...


Donkey on 05/11/2018:
What is a zerbert?

happy-1 on 05/11/2018:
It's when you give kisses and then blow to make fart noises and hang onto them so they can't get away... and then you make more fart noises.

Possibly a poor choice to do this, putting your face right next to the giant mouth of a big fat chompy baby bulldog... but I live dangerously.


Donkey on 05/11/2018:
Ya know, I would actually kind of like the laundromat if it weren't for the other people.

I hope you enjoy the remaining time left with dog-sitting :-)

happy-1 on 05/13/2018:
Hugs. I don't like having to spend hours on it... it feels like extra chores... but I am glad not to be doing tons of laundry today.



happy-1 - Wednesday May 09, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 225.5

SUCCESS!!! Cesar Milan would be impressed! I turned that puppy into a model canine citizen. I even fed the dogs chicken nose to nose without issue! And he is super food motivated and a big dominant alpha in the making and my dog is 19 with wobbly legs/butt. If he wanted her food it wouldn't be a contest. Then it was bedtime. My dog went to bed (dog tired) and I waited to see what he would do. He went and looked at her a couple of times and then figured out that he should do the same!!!! All on his own!!!! He'd been so good all day, I didn't have the heart to crate him. He slept soundly through the night, no whining, crying, chewing, peeing, running or anything. Just super loud bulldog snoring and a few breaks to change spots. I set an alarm for 4 since that's when they get up so I could let him out to pee... which he did, no hassle. My dog and I then went to sleep on the couch in case we had woken him up and made him active... but he came over for snuggles for a little bit before he went back to bed. I did figure out why my dog keeps saying no to co sleeping... he likes to cuddle tummy to tummy... like you are momma dog. This means he sits back on his hindquarters raises his legs and plunges down on top of you and settles in. At least there's no humping yet (something I was very happy about when I woke up with him sleeping on my head, belly in my face)... but I can see where that would not go over well with a senior lady dog with weak hind quarters and a couple of benign lumps she doesn't like touched. He pushes around some first to get you into the right spot and it's like ninja kidney strikes.

I did a supply run last night and got some brown rice and wheat tortillas. Not on my diet but they really helped me feel more at home. Comfort food.

Progress as of today: 91.5 lbs lost so far, only 19.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 05/09/2018:
His owners will be happy when they get back!

happy-1 on 05/09/2018:
Almost... right after I wrote that he peed my dog's bed

happy-1 on 05/09/2018:
Then I made some lunch and my dog dug my couch. I lost my temper and yelled "don't dig that couch" then grabbed her by the collar and put her in the bathroom. Then I made her a plate of rice, chicken and cheese and gave both dogs cbd oil treats. I gave myself a protein ice cream and the puppy dug his claws in my waist to beg for some so I yelled "no" "get" at him too. His treat must have kicked in because he's passed out on the floor. Aaargh. I'm a jerk to dogs.

happy-1 on 05/09/2018:
Off to take a bag of urine-soaked blankets to a coin op. Aaargh.


Donkey on 05/09/2018:
Oh the joys of doing pet-related laundry.... Schmittens Cat doesn't do too well with bladder control when she's very stressed out.

But I still think it was a victorious day -- keep working at that pup.

PS Brown rice & wheat tortillas -- not bad for comfort food. I hope they help :-)

happy-1 on 05/10/2018:
And the protein ice cream! I gurmess that's the good thing about a super restricted eating plan... almost everything is a cheat!

Maybe try some generic benadryl for your stressed out cat? Works on dogs for fireworks... though now that I have found cbd oil treats I am sticking to those for my dog. It takes the edge off my stress to de-stress my dog.


horn_of_plenty on 05/10/2018:
sounds like you are good with animals! i need to be tougher with my hamster. she gets her way - she shoos me away and doesn't like to be petted. she hides from me too and only takes food when she wants it from me...she's picky like like she's a Queen. and pees wherever she wants.


horn_of_plenty on 05/10/2018:
as a change of pace, i'll be making overnight oats and will make sure they include some protein and some fat.



happy-1 - Tuesday May 08, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 225.5

Day 4 of dog sitting. The puppy has chilled out, more or less. The three of us took a nap on the couch together with him drooling in my face and my dog chasing rabbits against my tush. I just went with it. Still feeding separately.

I have healthy food but it all seems likea lot of work to make or I am missing ingredients... like rice, hoisin or siracha. All I want to do is get a pizza. Fill up on something easy and tasty. Mostly I am just homesick, which is crazy. Maybe I miss Hulu. Can't believe how boring Direct tv is. Worn out. Told ex in SD that we should hang out next week since this isn't a ton of fun. I am waiting to put the puppy to bed in the crate to get my laptop out and work.

---

Made a giant bowl of veggie pho and it was good. Used shiritaki noodles and it was super low carb and healthy if high in sodium. Following it up with a second nap. I think I'm just really tired and hungry... even when I'm not chasing after the puppy physically, he is constant motion and need.

---

Sensory joy: laying on a big soft couch with my enormous, clean, sweet-smelling, fluffy shepherd mix as she has happy puppy dreams... while I cuddle a big fat bulldog puppy in "teddy bear" mode and he nuzzles my face with his flat little toothy face and "holds hands" with big fat puppy paws. "I like you human! You give good scratches!"

---

Puppy did great on his first pack walk! He figured out immediately that chewing through that new chain wasn't going to happen and was side by side, butt to butt with my dog the whole time. Perfect gentleman. Totally ignored all other dogs and when he saw My dog ignore cars and just head up driveways there were no more freak outs. He steers like a buick, but walked 3 long blocks perfectly... and had treats side by side with my dog perfectly.

Progress as of today: 91.5 lbs lost so far, only 19.5 lbs to go!

Donkey on 05/08/2018:
Hang in there! I'm kind of surprised - I thought you might like the change of scenery from your days at home. Alas, I totally get being out of one's routine, away from the comforts of things like Hulu - I get it.

happy-1 on 05/08/2018:
I might just be hungry, tired, and not getting enough exercise. With the recent weightloss I don't feel hunger on the adhd meds and I bet I'm not eating enough because I'm out of my routine. I think I only had 300 calories all day, and that soup was maybe 100... but I binged on chocolate covered blueberries and now I feel fine.


horn_of_plenty on 05/09/2018:
I think i'm going to plan for a shirataki noodle day...saves so many calories! nice job.

have you ever had kelp noodles? they are also very low carb / calories and filling.


bearcountrygg on 05/09/2018:
maybe low blood sugar.

happy-1 on 05/09/2018:
Yeah or just adhd. When I get hungry I lose my car keys and I have checked my blood sugar. Normal range.



happy-1 - Monday May 07, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 225.5

i'll repost tomorrow. Need to think about this one.

Progress as of today: 91.5 lbs lost so far, only 19.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 05/07/2018:
Even with the dog and puppy show.....having some time alone to think must be nice....but sometimes...if we are looking backwards instead of forwards....we get stuck...in memories that were not so happy......is there a group around that likes to work with dogs? How about volunteering at an animal shelter? There must be someplace to meet a guy with your interests.

happy-1 on 05/07/2018:
I need a job more. It's just I can't look anyone in the eye anymore and tell them I can do a good job.

happy-1 on 05/07/2018:
But in general I never meet guys out and about. I just never get hit on or they are married or have a girlfriend.


bearcountrygg on 05/07/2018:
I see that you are an only child too....( my brother died before I was born)...so I was raised as an only child too......I think that changes the whole dynamics of our childhood.....we were a kid amongst only adults...we didn't have the opportunity to learn the give and take as siblings do. They look at us as mini adults right from birth...we are the only potential caretakers of them when they are old, ( I've done that)...and you are doing that now....if something went wrong...it didn't take long to blame it on us...we were the only scapegoat. I think having an only child is not at all fair to the child....it makes them different in ways that other people can't understand......I think it causes kids to have a hard time understanding other kids. So many times in my entire life...I have wished that I had a brother or sister.... I did have a very good friend.for many years..and I'm happy to hear that you and Molly are friends again.....but there is nothing like having another kid in the house when you are growing up.....and we missed that.


bearcountrygg on 05/07/2018:
Sometimes we just have to be our own best friend...and boost our own egos...fake it till we make it. You have talent....I believe that you can do more than you think you can.


bearcountrygg on 05/07/2018:
Maybe just take a job....any job...while you are looking for the job of your dreams.....you never know...you may just find something or someone that clicks.

happy-1 on 05/07/2018:
I did... that was the gig I took in October


bearcountrygg on 05/08/2018:
There are many benefits to just taking a daily regular job...as a cashier....in an office...anything...I know that social security is iffy today...and in the future there are no guarantees that it will be there.....but I don't believe that that takes away from the benefit of paying into it.....as someone who is now drawing social security as a monthly income..(since 62)..it will be a necessity most likely for your senior years.....free lancing works as long as you pay into it yourself...but if you don't....then there will be no senior income if you do not have a pension or SS...when you are old....these are the years to pay that.....I can guarantee you that when you hit your 60's...you will want to retire...but with no pension or ss...there will be no money to do that. Even if you have to go flip burgers...you can still look for the type of work you want.


bearcountrygg on 05/08/2018:
I hope I didn't overstep my bounds...I'm talking to you like I talk to my kids......and if D hadn't had such a firm grasp on pensions, social security, insurances...etc...I would have been a babe in the woods myself....even though I watched my Dad go to work every day...no one really explained these things to me...until D did. He worked his butt off for 32 years so that we could retire one day...and he did a supreme job of it. Retirement in old age is dependent on working for the years between 16 and 62....or if possible even less...he was able to get full retirement plus...at 48...so he planned it...and carried it out day by day...went to college at the same time...it was tough...really tough...I went to college and worked as I wished...as an added thing...but we weren't dependent on that. You are still young enough to build up your social security.....you will need that one day....and a daily scheduled job will provide that.


bearcountrygg on 05/08/2018:
I should add that we lived on his pension from the ages of 48 to 62...when the social security also kicked in....so our income went up then. Please give a regular daily job some thought...

happy-1 on 05/08/2018:
Lol. That's all I work. Full time with benefits. Unless all I can get is contracts. I think I am on a recruiter blacklist.


horn_of_plenty on 05/08/2018:
your post must have gotten deleted?

keep on staying happy. BCGG has some good advice above, truthfully!



happy-1 - Sunday May 06, 2018
(Complete 80% or better of 16 health acts a day)
Weight: 225.5

Day 2 of dog sitting is in the bag. I was exhausted, overslept and then had a rough time and had to separate the dogs and take some private time for myself. There was some kind of altercation while I was in the bathroom, then when I came out the puppy was trying to dominate my dog who was up on the couch and not having it and she barked at him to learn him some manners. I put her in the bathroom most of the day, then him in the crate for 20 min while I went outside. Then I came back in and gave him 1:1 time, before I went in and gave her 1:1 time. Then I went and took a private break... because even having my dog staring at me is stress sometimes. Turns out the puppy we are dog sitting has never spent extended time with another dog and hasn't learned pack dynamics. I took my dog out for a ride in the car and part of a hamburger, then came back and fed the dogs separately, then had pack time in the living room till puppy bedtime at 9. Tonight my dog taught him how to submit and apologize to the pack leader (me). He tried to dominate her because she was on the couch again... So I did the Cesar Milan space blocking thing... When I dominated his space into a corner, she interceded and taught him how to come back and submit. All 62lbs of him shuffled over to our feet and showed us his belly. We then all peacefully shared a couch and watched tv. My dog even nanny dogged the puppy to go out and poop before bed. I tried out his cbd oil treats on my dog after I put him to bed in his crate, and my cranky senior dog flopped over on the bathroom rug totally mellow and chill. I was actually able to bleach my teeth and put on face cream in peace tonight. Maybe I should try that stuff on my dad!

Tomorrow I need to find Internet in the am and then go to the post office. Hopefully I can get it all done in 3h and then head back to chill w the dogs. There's a fitness bootcamp at the bottom of the hill I might check out, but I packed my yoga mat and resistance bands anyway. Had a big shock that my swimsuit is too big for me now!!! Need to take a progress photo.

----

1 - 2 protein ice cream sandwiches. They were too good.

2 - overnight oats. Coffee w coffeemate vanilla creamer. The coffee is too gross without it.

3 - a 4 up and a piece of cheese

4 - 2 diet cokes, some taco chips, salsa, and guac.

5 - a lettuce wrap cheeseburger, shared with my dog.

6 - dark chocolate covered blueberries and cherries.

Progress as of today: 91.5 lbs lost so far, only 19.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 05/07/2018:
Dogs are very interesting....ours respect D as their alpha...me not so much....when he started going to the kennels with me...it took him awhile to get them back into submission...now...no more random barking. Thankfully...D took over ALL dog duties yesterday.....I am happy about that.

happy-1 on 05/07/2018:
Augh... a kennel full of dogs that don't see you as alpha???? That must be awful.


bearcountrygg on 05/07/2018:
HAPPY......they see me as an old softy...the treat lady....they love the attention from me...and bark their fool heads off to get me to come over to them...LOL...D had to come out and look like a boss again...it worked.

happy-1 on 05/07/2018:
The puppy tried that this afternoon... heard my voice on the phone in the bedroom and started barking... so I crated him for 5 min. Then we did tricks for treats. I try not to reward bad behavior.



[ Previous Page 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 Next Page ]