- Wednesday May 30, 2007
I want those summer legs but am getting the feeling that i'm sacrificing my flat tummy for them...
It just keeps getting worse. I tried real hard yesterday and woke up this morning to find that i'd gained yet again. I don't know what i'm doing! And I feel terrible. Maybe i'm getting sick and my body is playing tricks on me. That must be it, what else could it be?
I had such a terrible headache this afternoon that it literally made me sick. I took an advil and a nap and now it's not as bad but I just feel like crap.
Last month I had to visit the emergency ward at the hospital because my period was really horrible. They gave me two shots, one in each hip. Would you believe that my left side STILL hurts? I went running yesterday and at every jarr of my foot to the earth I could feel a shooting pain in my hip, exactly where I received the needle. I wonder if they hit a muscle or something. Why would it still hurt after this much time?
Oh ladies, all I can do is complain today! Maybe tomorrow will be better. Yes, of course it will. Positive thoughts!
My mantra for the moment:
Enough is enough.
- Monday May 28, 2007
Update on the points challenge: I started it and now I feel that it's a complete waste of my time. I am gaining weight (I think because i'm eating far too much fruit) and it is not challenging me in any way whatsoever. I've lost ambition and motivation for the challenge. However, I have to keep up with it because there are others who say it is helping them. So for them I have to keep going. But I just want to say - I have realized I am definitely not a long-term healthy person. I like to do it in spurts, go as hard as I can, and then drop off the face of the earth for awhile. I know I have to work on this, but my gosh is it ever boring!!
On to other things; my running training is going well but of course am carrying around a few extra pounds and boy can I feel the difference.
And I wanted those summer legs so badly... someone help me!!! HELP ME!!!
- Thursday May 10, 2007
I'm such a sporadic journal entry'er. I don't know what i've been doing for the last two months, but obviously one of the things I have NOT been doing is logging on here...
The top two participants in the walking challenge decided amongst themselves to quit a few days early and split the winnings. There was no contest but between these two people - I was one of them and completely worn out. I was already wearing a knee brace because I was having such trouble walking! I'm never doing that again!
I HAVE however started a new contest - this one to target a more balanced lifestyle. I've realized in speaking with my Dad that we are hyper people - I can't remember the medical term he used, but it essentially means we go and go and go until we cannot 'go' any further. Then we are completely exhausted and will not do anything at all for days. This contest has a few more people in it, too. Maybe because it's not hog-wild-work your ass off-boot camp style. It's based on a point-system (you get so many points for doing certain things), and some of those things include eating fruits and veggies, whole grains, getting 7hrs of sleep each night, walking, working out, taking a bubble bath, etc. Then there are bonus points for trying a new recipe, a new activity, and this week's is setting up a workout just for you. Next week's i'm going to get everyone to try out their workouts and rate them. Anyways, it's much easier on me and therefore does not especially seem like a chore.
Which is why I can also do other things - like entering a 5K run. It is at the end of August and i've been working on my running seriously now for about three weeks. I'm going for a 10 minute mile, which would put me at around 30 minutes for 5K. I know it will be difficult for me (i'm not much of a runner, no matter how hard I try), but i'm determined to do this as it has been a goal of mine for sometime. I know it's just a 5K, but it's a good starting point!
What else - we recently received another dog - a Cockapoo named Zoe who is almost 8 months old now. We have definitely had our ups and downs with the two dogs, but they are precious and I wouldn't trade them for the world. Now my house, that i'd trade.
- Saturday Mar 03, 2007
This really IS my breakaway week for step counting!!! I am as of right now far in the lead and will be most fortunate if I can only keep it up for the next couple of days. The keeping it up part is what i'm most anxious about, though. Que Sera or however it's spelled.
Because bf is gone, i've been faithfully walking the dog each night (except for Wednesday because I was lazy and it was a blizzard outside). I've also not touched the vehicle at all so far - though today I will have to in order to get groceries. I've been walking to and from work each day and it amasses a great amount of steps as well as energy, enthusiasm, confidence - and paranoia. I've discovered that i'm a paranoid walker. So don't look at me the wrong way if you pass by me on the sidewalk - I might start to think you're out to get me.
The weather is not good. It's been snowing for days now and although it's not too cold it's still not fun trudging through the snow each day. Yes, those legs are going to look darn good come summer!
Have to go. Take care all.
- Tuesday Feb 27, 2007
So those were pms symptoms and I rallied hard against them this time and came out on top, for once. It came and went, and no sick days off work, just a little time spent on the couch trying to sleep through it.
My boyfriend is working out of town and so i'm using the opportunity to work my butt off and get lots of exercise in while I have the time. Although I miss him a lot and he's only been gone for a couple of days. As long as no one takes my dog away from me, I should be fine! But he's going to be away for months and I for sure won't see him for three weeks. It really sucks, but holy does it ever make you realize what you had.
Getting my steps in although everyone else seems to be as well, plus some extra steps in there too. I'm still a follower and will try my breakaway week now and see if I can't swoop back into first place. I'll be darned if i'm not even going to try to win!
My knees hurt from walking so much.
- Friday Feb 23, 2007
After writing about how I should find a way to replace bad moods and eating with bad moods and exercise, the next day I proceeded to be 'taken into' a bad mood and against my will purchased a very large bag of cheesies and ate the whole thing. I say against my will as in 'not enough will in my body to stop myself'. Ah, let it go.
Steps are still good, but boy am I tired today - and I think I am experiencing some pms symptoms. I'm getting crankier and crankier as the day progresses and my back is killing me. Ah, let it go.
We're going for a walk tonight and perhaps i'll jump on the bike and finish my count for the day. I'm looking forward to the weekend, but only to sleep. I really don't want to do anything besides that. Just sleep.
Oh my Lord can I ever complain.
On the brighter side...oh, forget it.
- Tuesday Feb 20, 2007
I'm riding high again; still behind in my steps but will catch up quickly if I keep doing what i've been doing for the last couple of days. I always resent the fact that I get so down at certain times in my life. I must discover a way to counteract those unambitious feelings - or at the very least not use food to try and cheer myself up!
It's much warmer outside (thank goodness for spring - if winter was 12 months long, I would go insane) and i've been walking outside a lot trying to get my sun time in. This morning I walked to work and quite enjoyed myself, although I was a bit warm and sweaty once at work. When I worked in a different position and had to walk almost all day, I was much happier and more at ease. I think I really like to walk. It seems to clear my head so much better than anything else I do.
Tomorrow night i'm back at kickboxing and i'm hoping it will up my steps to a new high!
Our dog truly enjoys and is also reaping the benefits of the Step Challenge. We can tell when he's had enough walking though - he starts to nip at my boyfriend's mittens. I'm not sure if he's trying to tell him that his paws are cold, or if he's asking my boyfriend to carry him the rest of the way home! We can read him pretty well by now - he holds his emotions in his eyes and it's so endearing and soulful. His thoughts run deep, i'm sure of it!
Take care all.
- Friday Feb 16, 2007
This last week I seem to have dropped from my cloud, curled up under the covers and tried to look dead to the world. Of course it didn't work, but it did mean that my steps were horrid for last week and I am again losing!! A new situation: my boyfriend has entered the competition in place of another stepper. Oh, look out now! He started on Wednesday and is going overboard on steps, trying to catch up to everyone else. I think he will over-exert himself and have told him that, but nevertheless he is also a competitive spirit and will work hard until he catches and passes the rest of us! A good thing to come out of this: he is motivating me to keep up. And today I am sore from an almost two hour walk with the dog last night. And I think I pulled a muscle in my leg, but I will never tell him or he'll make me stop!
Things have gotten better between us, but we are increasingly awkward around the other person due to this lack of communication. I have always included him in my activities but it just makes me resentful when he doesn't do the same for me. But I know there are things I need to just let go, and this may be one of them. It's just that sometimes I think that I deserve to be around someone who wants me to be around!!
Tonight wallyball is cancelled and so I will try to go to the gym before supper as we're going out (together, with friends) for wings and it may be a long night. I know after yesterday Chewy will be standing at the door, staring at the doorknob, waiting for his two hour walk!
- Wednesday Feb 07, 2007
Doing well, getting my average steps in each day and slowly gaining on the competition. Or so I think, anyways!
Here's a scenario for you that has nothing to do with dieting or excercising and has me in such a funk today that I wonder if perhaps i'd rather not say where i'd rather be:
My boyfriend bowls two days out of the week. He has also recently stopped drinking, but continues to go to the bar on both of these nights with his 'friends'. He wanted to bowl with his 'friends' last weekend without me, when we had decided last year to bowl together in the tournament I was telling you about. His team would have consisted of a married couple and a younger female, if I had not intervened and told him I wanted to bowl too. I have never met these friends before, and had no idea who they were until Saturday. My boyfriend neglected to introduce me to them. Last night I was asked to spare for someone and I agreed to, so went bowling again. At the end of the night my boyfriend stood near the doorway and it looked to me he was waiting for this girl to leave - watching her the whole time. I was furious with him and asked him if there was something going on that I didn't know about. He acted like he didn't know what I was talking about - but, my friends, i've been there before and I know the signs. However, I may just be paranoid enough to jump to conclusions, and so I apologized for upsetting him and went to bed. But the thought runs through my head every few minutes today, like a terribly bad film, of me watching him watching her. And it, without bias, is slowly breaking my heart.
What should I do?
gym tonight - bike, bike, bike. Then I have tomorrow AND Friday off work, so four day weekend for me! It's my birthday this weekend and I want to go into the city to see my Dad.
- Sunday Feb 04, 2007
Oh my God, everything hurts.
I'm so sore today - all over; there isn't one muscle that I can't hear screaming at me to sit down. And my brain is mush, too. I just want to take a nap and by golly, I just might do that.
We started bowling at 6am yesterday. Our first 'round' consisted of three games. After we won that round around 8am, we stopped for breakfast then returned to the allies for another 'round' of three games at 12pm. After those two rounds I was already mighty tired and figured i'd had enough of bowling, but we were doing so well that we just couldn't lose. To be quite honest, some of those games I didn't even really try all that much because I just wanted it to be over! But no, when I didn't try, my teammates did, and we landed ourselves in yet another round of three games by 4pm. I started out strong, catching a turkey (three strikes in a row) at the very beginning of the first game and AGAIN took it easy for the rest of the game. And AGAIN my teammates proved their worth by leading us into the next round!! And we won that one too, to take us into the finals at 10pm!!
Unfortunately by then we were all much too tired to move, let alone bend down to throw bowling balls down an alley. I alternated between sleeping with my head on bf's shoulder and sluggishly shuffling my feet down the alley to huck a ball. I just didn't even care anymore. I'm serious, I cared about nothing but sleep. Nothing in life was important except sleep. I was so tired by then that I was shivering cold; covered in a film of cold sweat listening to my teeth chatter away. It was NOT fun! And we lost in the final by only 63 points! Argh. All that work. We did get our money back, and an extra $25.00 per person for getting second place, so that at least is rewarding for our efforts.
I think my highest game was 211. I got three turkeys in all those rounds; I was on fire! My average has never, ever gone over 150. I bet my average was close to 180. I think we played a total of 14 games, but my memory is hazy on that.
I finally crawled into bed at 1:30am, and this morning when I woke up I could hardly move. Yes, I need a warm bath and a short nap.
I've already walked the dog today and did 30 minutes on the stationary bike, because I want to get those steps in. I'm almost there.
I'm almost there.