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legcramps - Monday Jan 25, 2010

Weight: 0.0

I gotta get back to the gym.  I mean, really.  This is pretty ridonculous already.

I went out for supper on Friday with a few friends, then played some Wii.  My calories came to 1,800.  I blame the soda I drank... pepsi pepsi pepsi.

On Saturday, I woke up to a fresh blanket of snow.  Now, you might think that would be such a glorious thing to see, but... you would be wrong.  I couldn't even get the back door open enough to let the dog out.  I'm not sure how much we got in that first round, but I would guess around a foot and a half.  Once I managed to get outside, the dog and I shovelled for an hour.  I only got the front and back paths done, and a path around my vehicle since i'd left it out for the night instead of parking it in the garage.  Feeling good about my accomplishments, the dog and I played inside the house for a long time.  When I finally decided I needed to run uptown for a few things, it had snowed another half a foot and the wind was picking up.  I decided not to shovel again until Sunday, since it didn't seem to be letting up any.  I have to say, it was definitely a lot of fun driving my 4x4 through the side streets.  I promise I didn't laugh at those tiny cars that were stuck in the snow drifts.  Promise.  I went to a friends' place that night and drank too many vodkas.  1,800 calories again.

Sunday, I dozed a lot.  And it snowed a lot.  And the wind blew a lot.  I got stuck once, then again trying to get back into my driveway.  Karma!  I think it must have snowed another foot, but hard to tell because the wind was making HUGE stinking snow drifts that were just UNBELIEVABLE!  A friend gave me some lasagna leftovers (I realize there is a theme here with my friends always giving me food.  I think they must sneak looks into my fridge when they come over.  I have food in there, just not a lot.)  Anyways, I ate ALL the lasagna, which put me at my calorie limit at 11:30 AM!  HA.  Had a couple friends over later that night to watch Charmed episodes, then called it a night.  2,500 calories.  Heehee?

Made it to work this morning, even had time to stop for take-out coffee.  All the buses are cancelled, the office here is empty of co-workers, and stories are flying around about how awful the weather is here and there and everywhere.  Some parts of the province have had no power now for over two days!

panda22 on 01/25/2010:
Hey Legcramps! Sorry to hear about the crazy amount of snow you had, I hate shoveling and trying to get out as well! Good exercise tho! lol Hope this week goes better for you! Maybe when your friends offer you food you can just politely decline? lol I don't know how else to avoid that, as I would probably accept it as well. Have a good day!


hollybelle on 01/25/2010:
Great exercise shoveling - only consolation, huh? Also that may have increased your appetite some. No need for the gym. 1800 cal days are not so bad the 2400 day can be your "cheat" day???? Also I have 4-wheel drive vehicle - a Nissan Pathfinder (2001 model year, though!!). LOVE it - especially when it snows!


geevee on 01/25/2010:
Gee, I wish I had friends like yours who give out CARE packages! I find morning the perfect time to eat leftover pizza, spaghetti and lasagna- type food. It seems to taste so much better cold at that time of the day. Lucky you!


chidogs on 01/25/2010:
Hey, sometimes you just have to give in and eat stuff. So long as you don't do it every day! The snow thing sounds amazing to me being a native SoCalif person. I would imagine shoveling is a good all around exercise! I would love to see my little dogs in the snow. Hee, they would wimp out so bad. Have a good one today!


nita51 on 01/25/2010:
I have a neighbor that always wants me to eat! eat! eat! and I politely tell her, No! No! No! She's lost about 100 lbs herself,,and is now super thin. Maybe she means no harm, or maybe she testing my will power,,,,but what ever her intentions,,,,she's learned that I have a mind of my own. It feels so good to not feel tempted by her or anything anymore. I have to constantly refuse her left overs. I can tell, this annoys her, but,,,, this is MY LIFE, and I've played around long enough with it. "2010" is our year to put back, into our lives, what we allowed people, food, and mainly ourselves to take away. (YOU CAN!) ( WE CAN DO THIS!) Love YA LOTS..........Nita


Zuzugirl4ever on 01/25/2010:
I have never found the occasional binge to be harmful in the long run when you are mostly good about things otherwise! Crazy amount of snow! I agree with the others; at least it was an opportunity for some exercise! Hang in there!



legcramps - Friday Jan 22, 2010

Weight: 0.0

I had a very busy day yesterday.  I have to say that I got quite a bit of work done, but now all that energy I was boasting about on Monday has formed into a separate being that has perched itself beside me and is wheezing heavily, coughing loudly, and generally being a pain in the you-know-what.  Actually, it's not all THAT bad.  In fact, I feel good.  Most likely because it's Friday today...

Wednesday's calories were around 1,000.  Just one of those days.  I tried to get more calories in, but I really wasn't feeling it at all on Wednesday.  I think I was more interested in sleep.

I made up for the lack of calories by adding them up on Thursday to 1,900 by the end of the day.  I still think this is okay.  There will be days such as this - the obstacle to overcome is purely mental.  As in, I need to tell myself that this is okay, that I haven't failed myself, that i'm still in great caloric balance for the week, that I didn't binge, I ate well (blueberry muffin, rice, granola bar, pork chop, cream of broccoli soup).  I just drank too many darn mochas!

I have the last pork chop to finish up, and rice coming out my... I eat a lot of rice, and have a large container of cooked rice in the fridge.  Needless to say, i'll be eating a lot of rice over the weekend.  I may attempt to make a batch of my friend's cream of broccoli soup since it was so yummy and not that heavy in calories.  Plus, it would spice up all the boring rice.  That's why I hardly ever tell you what i'm eating, it's just boring!

I really hope gym-buddy wants to go to the gym tonight.  I haven't been all week.  If it's possible, I actually miss it.

KathyBlue on 01/22/2010:
try to mix rice with veggies :)


chidogs on 01/22/2010:
I get frozen stir fry veggies and do them up over rice with a splash of soy sauce. I love rice too, as it does give one a sense of being full, unlike a lot of foods, veggies, fruits that don't seem to register on the "full" scale. :)


hollybelle on 01/22/2010:
Hpe you get to go to the gym. I think it's fine to average days together - although I like to be kind of even on calories, etc. Have a great weekend!


nita51 on 01/22/2010:
And A Fantastic Week-end to you as well. Hope your gym buddy doesn't cancel again, but maybe when the weather gets better, she'll be ready to get back in the groove again.


Horn_Of_Plenty on 01/23/2010:
hi! i'm with you! i don't worry so much about high cal days anymore, as long as they are considered a healthy limit by all standards! thanks for the weekend wishes. i wish i could comment more on diaries but with school and work and my exercise i feel my time will be pulled this way till i graduate the end of June! have a great weekend!


biscottibody59 on 01/23/2010:
Wishing you all the best for the weekend!


chidogs on 01/25/2010:
Hee, I should have guessed you would be an expert on legcramps with your username! It could be all the walking I did over the weekend, and not taking my vitamins and calcium to make up for it! But I need to increase my water too. I used to drink a lot when I worked, but since I retired I'm not drinking as much.



legcramps - Wednesday Jan 20, 2010

Weight: 0.0

I'm a creature of habit and seem to thrive under regularity and schedules.  Back down to the weight I was at before Christmas.  It seems to have taken a while, but that is alright, I have all the time in the world!

NITA asked when I take vitamins and such.  I try to get them all down in the morning, but will have to see how that goes after a week or so of it.  Since I LOVE routine, I always take the calcium/magnesium when I wake up.  I take everything else to work with me and get them down before I start the workday and on weekends I take them before I eat the first meal of the day.  It seems to be working, as long as my memory stays intact and I remember to take them!

I didn't make it to the gym last night as my gym-buddy is sick with the flu, poor thing.  I was okay with sleeping the evening away, then obviously had trouble throughout the rest of the night getting the whole 8 hours in.  Oh well.  Not sure what I will do tonight, i'll probably check in with my friend to see how she's feeling and go from there.  I don't like going to the gym on my own, not sure if I don't have the incentive or if i'm just being self-conscious.  Probably the latter.  I walked to work today, it took me 30 minutes, but was it ever a nice walk.  Early morning, people are just starting their days, the weather was good - it was worth it.  1,200 calories yesterday.  Doing well!

I'm having troubles with my vehicle (which is why I walked to work today).  It's in the garage this morning, hopefully being fixed but I sure hope it won't be a hefty bill.  I don't know what i'd do if I had to start looking for a different vehicle.  Talk about squeezing the budget.  Hopefully it only needs to be thawed out and there are no bigger issues.  I have a big trip coming up in February, so I really need a dependable vehicle.

chidogs on 01/20/2010:
A 30 minute walk sounds great. I'm working up to that 10 minutes at a time. Hope your car is an easy and not expensive fix. Have a great day.


KathyBlue on 01/20/2010:
Thanks for the comment! :) That's something I miss: a gym buddy... Or a sports buddy, whatever the sport is until I like... and I'm not very picky, but noone's in the mood to compromise for 3 times a week... so I joined to a tennis class.. I'd been doing tennis for years, even in competitions but now for 3 years I haven't done a thing. I blame my job... and myself.


nita51 on 01/20/2010:
Thanks for sharing, regarding the vitamins. Hope your car repairs won't be too costly. Happy about your weight loss, Bet you turned some heads while walking to work (smile) Take Care,


hollybelle on 01/21/2010:
Looks like a good report! Best wishes for your car's speedy, inexpensive recovery.


biscottibody59 on 01/21/2010:
Hope the car isn't too "sick"--money or otherwise! Have a great day!


selina on 01/22/2010:
I love the idea of walking to work - 30 min walk is just perfect! Good luck with the car!



legcramps - Tuesday Jan 19, 2010

Weight: 0.0

I had so much energy yesterday, it was truly amazing.  I didn't know what to do with myself!  My friend ended up cancelling gym night, so instead I went to the store and did some grocery shopping and picked up two large 5 gallon jugs of water and carried them into the house.  1,300 calories yesterday.

I'm not sure where i'm getting all this energy from, but I have a few ideas.  I might say it's because of going to the gym, but I don't think I go often enough to feel that kind of energy.  I might say maybe i'm getting enough sleep finally, but that wouldn't be true.  I have a feeling it's because of all the vitamins i'm taking for the last week.  I don't know if they can kick in that quickly, but it must be that - what else could it be?

I'm taking vitamin C and B Complex, a multi-vitamin and mineral (Centrum), an Omega-3 supplement, Calcium and Magnesium.  My doctor suggested Vitamin B Complex, Calcium and Magnesium.  I added the rest because I know I don't get enough in the food I eat.

So, i'm going to try and finagle my friend into going to the gym today.  Slight headache this morning is reminding me that I haven't had my morning cup of coffee yet!  Off I go!

chidogs on 01/19/2010:
Enjoy your coffee! Hey it might be a combination of all the above, but I do know they say not to take vitamins at night because you might have trouble sleeping. So I guess they can energize you. Have a great day.


willbe100lbs on 01/19/2010:
Hello! thanks for your comment. I am feeling better thanks yeah, I'm toning up more but I'd like to see the number on the scales go down a bit too! I know muscle weighs more than fat so that makes me feel a bit better but its still just frustraiting. The problem with me going back to dancing is that its just not a sensible environment for me to put myself back in as im still recovering from an eating disorder (partically caused by the pressure I got about my weight when I was doing ballet). I'm pretty much only classically trained too and dont feel confident to try another form of dance yet.

Glad you have so much energy! Never a bad thing! Hope you enjoyed your coffee! xx


MoodyMe on 01/19/2010:
Can I borrow some of that energy? LOL~Enjoy it!! I need to look into vitamins as well because my eating is so unbalanced...Thanks for the reminder!


nita51 on 01/19/2010:
Hey legcramps, you can buy something called a "flash Drive," at Walmrt,, it is about $12. It comes in 2GB & 4GB, you will be able to transfer files & folders, and you won't have to lose your good music. I'd cry, if I lost my music. You're definitely doing something right, to get that kind of energy,,,so keep on taking good care of yourself. Question, Do you take all the vitamins together at once?, or do you kind of spread them out? Seriously I never know how to get them all down, so I usually end up not taking any, (which I know is not good for me) I need to be on something. Have A Great Wednesday.



legcramps - Monday Jan 18, 2010

Weight: 0.0

Today, i'm going to be positive.  Enough of all this complaining I do!!

I had a great weekend, calories were a little higher but i'm okay with that as I enjoyed every little bite!  Friday - 1,500 calories; Saturday - 1,700; Sunday - 1,900.  I watched so many movies, chatted with friends and family, travelled to the city.  I like driving highways when the sun is just coming out.  By the time I was halfway to the city, the sun was flowing through my side windows, warming my arms and face and it felt great.  I can't wait for spring to arrive!  I needed that boost of vitamin D!

I went to the gym on Friday and did 30 minutes on the treadmill, 8 of that running.  I'm getting there!

Today is another gym day, plus grocery shopping and cleaning up some bills and papers.  I would like to run for about 12 minutes today, so hopefully I will have enough energy for that by the end of the day!

Have a great week everyone!

MoodyMe on 01/18/2010:
Sounds like a great weekend!!! Amazing what a little sunshine can do for us isn't it? I'm ready for spring as well~

Hope you have a great day!!


chidogs on 01/18/2010:
Thanks for your comments. I am working on being creative about indoor exercises. So long as daughter and hubs aren't here, I don't mind hopping around a bit.:)


bez15 on 01/18/2010:
Great job with the treadmill recently! Running on those are so tough for me. I can't wait for spring either!! We can walk/jog outside! Woooohooo


panda22 on 01/18/2010:
Glad to hear your weekend went so well! Awesome job building up your treadmill running minutes, it's a great feeling when they start to add up each time! I can't wait for spring either, it's my favorite season =) Have a nice evening and a great week!


nita51 on 01/18/2010:
I love it when we have the mind set, to just enjoy our foods, and let our bodies balance everything out, (especially when we know were eating healthy} Yes I too like the way the sun feels. I've been in for the last couple of days, but 2mmrrw, I'll think I'll go for a short drive. You're doing a great job. Keep on loving yourself. Take Care


selina on 01/19/2010:
Have a great week, too!!!!


biscottibody59 on 01/19/2010:
Have a Happy Tuesday:-) Keep up the good work!



legcramps - Friday Jan 15, 2010

Weight: 0.0

Doctors in small towns, even small cities, in this place are usually abrasive, unfeeling and... well... laughable.  This last one told me to stay on Depo forever, unless I want to try to conceive.  This drug is one factor in causing Osteoporosis (which is a disease that has diminished my mother's ability to do most things).  I go for another shot today after work.

I'm in my early thirties, but I feel so much older than that.

My dinner party went well last night.  I didn't burn the lasagna, my guests pretended that the chocolate pudding pie (light version) WASN'T too runny that it was spilling over the lid of the dish, and we had a nice evening of watching episodes of Charmed.  Took a bath, went to bed.  1,700 calories yesterday.  I think that's pretty good, considering we had a nice big dinner.

TGIF.  Seriously.  I'm glad this week is over!  Gym tonight, then Saturday i'm driving into the city to lunch with Dad and catch up with a friend.  On Sunday I hope to find another old movie on tv, lay on the couch, do laundry.

This morning, my tummy feels flatter than usual.  I want to drink lots of water today.  Better get on it, I guess.

hollybelle on 01/15/2010:
Sorry to hear about your day yesterday and about the problems you are having with female stuff. It's always the women isn't it - I wish men had to be more responsible about birth control! I am well past child-bearing years (55) but I did my time on birth control patrol (so to speak) - WHEW! I do have a younger friend who has recently tried this Nuvo-Ring thing and really likes it. I don't know if that would work for you, or if it has the same side effects as the depo-provera shots, etc. I also I just realized I'm assuming you are taking the depo for birth control when you may be taking it for theraputic reasons - so excuse all together if these comments are invalid or unwanted in anyway....:o) On the food front - looks like you are doing well with exercise and caloreis - YAY!


glycrina on 01/15/2010:
I am going to be thirty this year and I feel like I am turning 55 -- wishing I have only ten years until retirement! I am sorry about your women troubles but you are doing a great job on staying active and keeping calories low. Congrats on a successful dinner party!


nita51 on 01/16/2010:
Some large city Dr. can be abrasive too. I actually had a Dr. look at me with disgust in his eyes, then ask me if I smoked cigarettes? I answered "no never" then he shook his head, and said "well maybe you should have" as to say maybe you wouldn't have been so obese. What good is trading one addiction, for another? But that was then and this is now. I am getting my life together and silly comments like that doesn't bother me anymore. Keep drinking that water and believing in yourself. Take Care.



legcramps - Thursday Jan 14, 2010

Weight: 0.0

Yesterday I went to see my gynecologist about the problems I'm having with my menstrual cycle.  I thought I was going for a simple, external ultrasound.  Oh, how wrong I was.  All in all, it was a horrible day, ending with the doctor asking to do yet another exam and me immediately yelling out "NO WAY!".  When I finally got home, I collapsed on the couch and slept for four hours straight because the whole thing just... exhausted me to my breaking point.  I did go to the gym, but only walked for 30 minutes and didn't even run one little bit.  But, I DID go to the gym.

Tuesday had 1,300 calories, Wednesday 1,600 calories.  I went to the gym on Tuesday too - ran 14 minutes out of 35 total.  Really good day.

I was stuck below 1,000 calories yesterday after eating supper.  Was so full, and so blah, that I didn't WANT to eat anything, just wanted to go to bed.  But I had some cashews, then tried to take a warm bath.  I had just gotten into the tub and decided I needed the water to be just a little warmer.  In the process of adding some and letting some out, the plug stopped working.  Once I had it fixed, almost all the water was out of the tub and I was a-shivering away.  When I tried once again to fill the tub, my hot water had run out.  Eventually, I got myself out of the tub and back onto the couch, where emotional eating set in and I had me some chips.  Finally the hot water came back and I had a nice bath and went to bed with the heating pad secured to my midsection.

The feeling has spilled over into today, which is really unfortunate because I am hosting a dinner party tonight.  Trials and tribulations, huh?

thinnside40 on 01/14/2010:
Darnit, I was hoping that by now you would of found a Dr. that could help you..... Sorry you haven't.... Take Care!



legcramps - Tuesday Jan 12, 2010

Weight: 0.0

*YAWN*

I am so tired right now.  I was in bed by 11pm, but couldn't fall asleep for what felt like hours and hours.  The alarm shrilly buzzing in my face this morning at 6:30 was just about enough to put me over the edge  emotionally.  I almost called into work, but thought to myself "for lack of sleep?" and decided against it.  That would have aged me.  Anyways, gulping down the coffee but it hasn't slapped me in the face yet.  I'm so tired, the computer screen keeps blurring out of focus on me.  This entry will probably take me an hour to write.

So my gym partner is pretty sick these days.  She decided against going to the gym last night and instead wanted to go today.  So I told her that I would go with her.  The extra time at home didn't really help me out too much - I saved some pictures onto discs and layed on the couch mostly.  But I did have an evening meeting, and it helped to not be so rushed (which is usually what I am most of the time - self-inflicted, of course). 

I am thinking of getting the Dell Vostro 320 all-in-one desktop computer.  My monitor at home died and the computer I have now is slow and old.  Does anyone know if this is a good choice?  I just want something to play games on and burn the odd disc of pictures and home videos.

Yesterday was 1,400 calories.  That's very good.  That's two consecutive days of very good.  I am very good.  I should say that to myself more often!

hollybelle on 01/12/2010:
YES! YES! YES! you should say nice things to yourself - out loud and in your head - it's amazing what being positive can do for you. You deserve good comments and good things. Others don't always do that for us - so why not take care of ourselves with compliments and positive thoughts about ourselves? I may not like my weight right now, but I like myself. That's something!


geevee on 01/12/2010:
So you did a "Geevee" did ya? Good for you! Be sure you measure out and put in a small container what you've decided to snack on. Just don't keep eating from the jar or can until you're full. You get to eat so much more that way!


biscottibody59 on 01/12/2010:
Thanks for you kind and thoughtful sentiments:-)

Don't know about that computer--but I will be in the market for one myself, I hope later than sooner.

Have a good day!


thinnside40 on 01/12/2010:
Take care of yourself.....


nita51 on 01/12/2010:
Look at you,,,, you're doing wonderful. Hope you get some good feedback regarding the computer. I'm not very computer savvy. But I know you'll make the right decision.


nenak on 01/13/2010:
Im on an apple mac. does the job pretty good so far.....



legcramps - Monday Jan 11, 2010

Weight: 0.0

My weekend went fairly well, in all ways imaginable. 

After my horrible evening on Thursday, I forced myself to calm down and take it easy on the weekend.  Normally, I would be a cleaning freak or over-eat or double book with friends to make the time go by faster.  This time, I forced myself to think about how I acted, how everyone around me acted, and to really analyse and figure out what the real issues were.  I was upset with my friend's hubby on Thursday at badminton.  The fact that X was there would have been ok with me if only friend's hubby would have acknowledged that HE was there as MY friend, not X's.  I believe that is what pushed me to react to X's being there the way I did.  I am a little ashamed of my actions and of my friend's actions, but can only move on from here.  At least I stopped myself from making a complete fool of myself by losing it on X in front of people who probably have no idea that he played me for five years.  I am proud of that at least, even if some people there may have thought I acted high schoolish.

Friday was poor with calories - meaning, I needed more than I got.  It was kind of a wierd day, the morning and early afternoon were nice and slow, then in the later afternoon I realized I had to do SOME things and so my day sped up a bit and I lost track of mealtimes.  I still managed just under 1,000 calories, but I know it should have been more.

Saturday was 2,200 calories.  I ended up going for supper with a friend of mine, boxing half of it up, then eating it a few hours after I got home.  The good part is that I drank two bottles of water before deciding that, yes, I was still hungry!

Sunday was 1,500 calories.  It was a great day, filled with laundry chores, some computer work, and watching old movies on tv like 'Sweet November'. 

Back at work today, taking down Christmas decorations and trying to get the pile of paperwork down a bit since I was off on Friday.  Planning to hit the gym a little earlier because I have an evening meeting tonight.

panda22 on 01/11/2010:
Glad you had a good weekend and that this week has started out better for you!


mskitty on 01/11/2010:
Uggggg I just read your last entry about your X and that "friend". People are so stressful. I seriously have zero friends because I simply have no tolerance for drama anymore. Everybody just seems to be crazy and I just slowly stop hanging out with them because there is always something that either happens or that they want to get me in the middle of. *shakes head* I am trying to make new friends but I really turn off the minute stuff like that comes up. I honestly think I am better off. anyways I am ranting. Thats what happens when you get cabin fever.... good luck today.


greengirl on 01/11/2010:
Hey legcramps thanks for calling by my diary. I too have problems with eating because of the behaviour of other people . It would be good if we could just ignore them wouldn't it. Your calories seem to average out to a good total for the few days tho' so at least no damage was done. Be good to yourself :)


MoodyMe on 01/11/2010:
I'm glad that you took the time to process what happened and your reaction to it..That's always a good thing to do. Sounds like you had a good weekend~Keep up the good work legcramps~you got this!


weightlossyoyo on 01/11/2010:
Overall calories you seem to have done pretty good. Good movie on Sunday. I watched it not too long ago.


nita51 on 01/12/2010:
Well,, some days we do eat less calories, other days. but somehow I feel, it all balances out. At lease we're not eating like we use to. Right? Trust me,,,,I use to get up, in the middle of the night and cook a full coarse meal, I'm serious, and then go back to bed. That was many years ago,, thank God, I'm no longer "living on the edge" like that anymore. sorry to babble on, but I needed to get that off my chest. Thanks for listening.


selina on 01/12/2010:
Have a good day today!



legcramps - Friday Jan 08, 2010

Weight: 0.0

Don't you just love it when things are going really great for you and then all of a sudden, something happens to totally bash into oblivion all your efforts?  Just an F.Y.I. - I will be complaining again today... i'd rather you called it venting, but i'll understand why you might think the proper phrase for it is 'being a baby'.

I did ok yesterday.  Actually, I should have eaten more, but I didn't realize I could until I added up the calories today.  Just over 1,000. 

I frequented the gym, but decided instead of going hog-wild on the treadmill that I would take it easy since I was going to play badminton for an hour and a half afterwards with my friend's hubby.  I went a total of 35 minutes, with 6 minutes of running.  Took it easy, but still felt like I did something so that was nice.

I made sure to leave the gym early enough to make it to badminton on time.  When I got there, friend's hubby was already there.  For whatever reason, he didn't acknowledge that I showed up, instead walking with his racket and a birdie over to an empty court.  In the meantime, I signed myself in and was about to tie up my laces when I noticed the biggest a$$ in the world walk into the gym.  Yes, that's right.  X showed up.  He stood not four feet from me.  I wanted to take both my hands, wrap them around his neck...well, you get the idea.  The gall of that incredulous boy!

My breath sort of 'wooshed' out of me as I saw him, and I think I said something like 'really'.  He heard that (because he stood not four feet from me, the arrogant bastard!), and said 'hi'.  I laughed at him.  Well, I sort of huffed, hicupping every so often.  He looked at me and I swear to the heavens, I believe he truly thinks he's done nothing wrong.  I think he really believes we could be friends.  He's psychotic!

Friend's hubby noticed X was there and, with a bright smile lighting his face, ran up to him and said 'you're my partner, ok?'.  WTF?  WTF is UP with THAT?  He then looked over at me and said 'hi legcramps'.  I barely looked at him, sort of half-nodding, half-choking as I waggled over to an empty court with some guy I didn't even want to play with because I thought i'd be playing with friend's hubby.

I stayed half an hour.  Out of an hour and a half.  I ruined my workout for this.  It ruined my night.  Friend's hubby made me feel betrayed, even though later that night he tried to make up for it.  I feel like I can't talk to any of my friends because they're all still friends with X and GOSH, I would NEVER want to put THEM in the middle of anything!

Went home.  Ate a granola bar.  Drank some water.  Stayed up late crying.  That's my life.

I have today off, am hoping to go to the gym to let off more of this steam, but will see what else I have to get done.  Just hanging back with a coffee for now.

nenak on 01/08/2010:
life! sometimes top of the world, sometime as pants as pants can be!!!! look at it this way. your feeling rock bottom, the only way is up! you probably dont want to know this but it will get better! in the meantime dont let him get you down! take care sarah


starfish on 01/08/2010:
*hugs* At least you did great on calories and still got some exercise.


sundropgurl on 01/08/2010:
I'm proud of you that you kept your focus even in the midst of the stress!!! You'll get through this! (( hugs ))


panda22 on 01/08/2010:
Sorry to hear about your bum night at badminton! I hate people who act like that! I guess you could say the advice you gave me fits your night as well! Love the Serenity prayer btw, I have it on a plaque on my wall! Thanks for posting it so I could read it, needed that! Hope your day is better today! You still did great yesterday despite X!! Happy Friday!


hollybelle on 01/08/2010:
Man, that's cold. My question is - what were your friends thinking - I might have missed something, but obviously theye didn't tell you he'd be the 4th badminton player??? What's up with that. I don't know the story of the breakup 'cause I've been gone awhile, but if you and ex aren't on speaking terms and your friends knew it.....Gee! Get to know some new people! I'm not sure I would have even stayed to play at all. You were good to, at least, attempt to play with them! Well, it is what it is, as they say - don't let it stop you from your goals health & fitness or otherwise. I hope your weekend is good. Give yourself something nice and keep thinking - it's them - not me - BECAUSE IT IS!


Horn_Of_Plenty on 01/09/2010:
starfish is right...you did get some exercise and the whole day wasn't a complete wash even if you think it was.

did you ask friend's hubby if he had planned on playing you on badminton? you should let him know you had been hoping to be his partner or whatever it's called and that you are sorry it didn't work out. see what he says...maybe you both had a misunderstanding?

all in all, don't let this little bit of a night put you in the dumps...it seems that the friend's hubby wasn't on your wavelength at all! you'll be ok!


MoodyMe on 01/09/2010:
Wow..in my opinion you have every reason to be pissed off and hurt..I would be also. And venting here is a good way to help relieve some of the pressure, and don't ever think you're being a baby...seriously. Ugggg...I'm pisst off and I don't even know these people!

However, I have to say GOOD FOR YOU for getting a workout in, and for NOT making yourself feel better afterwards with food. That's huge!!! I may have not things as well as you did!

Let it go now, it's done and over..it upset you last night~but don't let it have anymore power over you...

Hope today was better...Keep up the great job and stay strong!


weightlossyoyo on 01/09/2010:
Well how rude what that? I am sorry that some men can be such AZZes! Don't play with him anymore! Hope tomorrow is better!


biscottibody59 on 01/11/2010:
Hope this week improves for you--keep up the good work! Don't let these people run you over--you're worth more than that!



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