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moogy - Tuesday Apr 26, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



All my life, my heart has yearned for a thing I cannot name.  Andre Breton

Today I am grateful for: my daughter, who looks after me, my grandchildren, who love me, accepting what I cannot change

Hello Lovely Girls, It is really chilly this morning, overcast with patches of blue. It will probably be a lovely sunny afternoon. I think I have mentioned this before, but, I love this time of year. I was born to live in a gentle green cool climate. It makes me happy. My daughter and I were in the garden yesterday and it was raining lightly and she said "Mom, look at the weather, isn't it fantastic" funny girl! I don't know where she gets it from.

Of course, I had every intention of going back onto a real meal healthy diet yesterday, unfortunately my fridge only contained yucky vegies, I am now restocked and good to go. I have a huge pantry stocked with food for the zombie apocalypse but tinned and packet food does not make up the main part of my diet. I eat mainly fresh food, fish, chicken, lots of vegies and some cereals and nuts. Of course, I have to have a little dark chocolate and not being a zealot on the food front am happy to indulge myself with the occasional treat. Anyway, I am glad to say my fridge now contains fresh vegies and I am writing my food for the day below so that I know I cannot waver!!!!!! I hope you girls have a good evening and a great day tomorrow. Love you girls:) 

Today's Planned Food


basa fillet, honeyed carrots, peas

bodywise bar, hot chocolate

spicy chicken thigh, cauliflower, green beans, gravy

Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

sweetpea1977 on 04/26/2011:
Sounds like you're gearing up for a nice day!! The weather sounds amazing! :)

Mealplan sounds great, especially dinner. Enjoy!!

V on 04/26/2011:
If there is anyone in the world I would go through the Zombie Apocalypse with, it would be YOU :) You can supply the food and I shall supply the muscle behind conquering them!!! Of course with your skills in weapons, there is no way we would get defeated!!! LOL Hurrah!! Lub You

V on 04/26/2011:
LOL!!! Moogy you crack me up!! LOL where were you for yestedays post?? I so wanted to bash that guy's head in for making that girl cry like that...I haven't been that mad in a looooong time!!!

getmebackto150 on 04/26/2011:
sounds like a good day for you!!! Thanks for your comment! I would DEFINITELY look ingo EVERY aspect of IVF before going through with it... Not sure if I would even decide to do it in the end... I just feel much better knowing if it comes down to it and we cannot have a baby naturally, hubby and I will be on the same page making the decision process!!! Good luck with your healthy day!!

thinkpositive on 04/26/2011:
Good ideas for me- stocking my pantry and planning meals. Have a good day!

biscottibody59 on 04/26/2011:
Have a great afternoon!

YellowDress on 04/27/2011:
Great menu!Your comment made me suspicious,i'll check;)

YellowDress on 04/27/2011:
One of my aunt also lives in Australia,goodnight to you:)

thisisit on 04/27/2011:
Actually, I work on salary (because attorneys have to often pull long hours, no one wants to pay us) so I won't be getting an extra dime for those extra 7 hours I pulled yesterday. :(

Supercheese on 04/27/2011:
:) thanks moogy :) have a great day today!!

h82bfat on 04/27/2011:
Thanks for checking in yesterday! I've often wondered why the price of pedometers are either super cheap or NOT cheap.... I say - where's the middle ground!! ;c) Someone did suggest mapmyrun.com so I'm gonna give that a try. Hope you have a great day!

Umpqua on 04/27/2011:
Your menu looks great, and it's nice to see you round these parts again :)

Hackersdiet on 04/27/2011:
Thanks for the support. I appreciate it. Your menu looks really good. I had cottage cheese and a banana for lunch. But I love cottage cheese. Your menu looks delicious.

moogy - Monday Apr 25, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



Kindness, I've discovered, is everything in life.   Isaac Bashevis Singer

Today I am grateful for: wonderful rain, people who care about me, winning the battle again

Hello Lovely Girls, It is late on this rainy Monday afternoon, nearly five o'clock. I have been battling with my depression for a few days but am finally coming out the other side. I should have expected it, it seems to hit after every seizure. This time I think I was enjoying the lovely Autumn weather and the cool that it sneaked up on me. Only thing to do is lay low, sleep and wait for time and my medications to get me through. I am feeling much better and up to about 80%, which is pretty good for me. I am having intermittent dizzy spells but apart from that no ongoing symptoms of the last seizure. I see the neurologist on the 23rd of next month and hopefully will get some answers.

On the food front - I haven't been dieting but neither have I been over eating. I did have a couple of Easter treats but haven't been eating very much. Just the usual too many carbs to lose weight. Anyway, I am back and hopefully will be back on my wholefood diet tomorrow. Actually I don't think I have had a real meal in days, just snacks. I am looking forward to eating real food again. Oh!! if only my physiology would allow me to be one of those depressed people who just don't eat and fade away!!!! Of course, I can never resist the urge to feed myself when hungry even when I am low. Come to think of it food is always the answer, come rain, shine, and all the cloudy bits in between. Thank you to those of you who have been looking for me. I am afraid I am days behind in reading diaries. I will catch up with you and your lives tomorrow. I still love you and am sooo grateful to be part of this group of wonderful women.:)

Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

hollybelle on 04/25/2011:
Hey there. Just glad to see your post! I eat when stressed. That's sommething I must watch. When I'm depressed it can go either way depending on the depth of the depression. When I'm content I don't typically overeat.

loveray on 04/25/2011:
So glad to see you back!! Im so sorry you havent been feeling well - I had a rough week myself with my depressive tendencies. Eating and retreating only makes it that much worse:( but it's so hard to think that way in the moment of a binge. I hope that you can enjoy the breeze and take some time to just relax and be you. xo

V on 04/25/2011:
You have no idea how happy I am to hear from you!! I hope we can catch up later this evening, I have to head out for work soon :( LUB YOU

getmebackto150 on 04/25/2011:
glad to hear your are feeling a bit better!!! I totally relate to eating for every occasion... sad, happy, mad, etc... It all seems to lead to food for me too:(

biscottibody59 on 04/25/2011:
:-) Good to see a post--take it easy!

sweetpea1977 on 04/25/2011:
Glad you are doing a little better. Keep posting!

Umpqua on 04/25/2011:
Good to see a post from you and I'm happy you're doing a little better. Hugs and hope to see you again soon! :)

liza36 on 04/25/2011:
I'm glad to hear from you...I have been wondering how you've been. It's intersting to me how we can always count on our appetite regardless of what's happening around us or how we feel about things. When I'm depressed, eating just comes with that.

I hope you feel better today, and know I'm thinking about you.

V on 04/25/2011:
HI!!! :) the man front is a slow moving process...I have been so busy with work and Turbo, there is little time for anything else...We chat it up on the phone and I can hang out with him before I go to Chicago, I have a few there waiting in the wings(as you already know) LOL! I just want to make sure that the spark is still there and if so, I have to be on my best behavior when I am in Chicago....LOL Maybe ;)

chidogs on 04/25/2011:
Hi Moogy. Glad you are feeling more "up" now. It sounds like you are doing just what you need to do at this time. Steady the course! Take care of yourself. Hugs.

Supercheese on 04/25/2011:
yay moogy is back!!! GLad you are doing better and dont worry a little too much of easter treats never hurt anybody! (boyo did i munch on a lot of eggs :) )

thisisit on 04/26/2011:
Happy to read that you are starting to feel better. As for eating when emotional or depressed, I think all of us on this site do that or have done that. I do it. And I get jealous of my best friend, who will not touch a thing when she is stressed out. I just try to watch myself, I guess.

Have a good day!!!

newme24 on 04/26/2011:
Glad you're feeling better, moogy! I can definitely relate to the emotional eating-- whether it's because I'm happy or sad or anything in between! Your remark about wishing to be one of those depressed people who don't eat made me laugh because I said the same exact thing to my friend the other day!! At lease we're in good company :) Hope you have a great day!

Maria7 on 04/26/2011:
Missed you VERY MUCH while you were away! Hope you cheer up and feel better! :-D

lolla on 04/26/2011:
Thanks for your comment Moogy, I wish you all the best and brighter days ahead!

moogy - Sunday Apr 17, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



Happiness is the absence of the striving for happiness.  Zhuangzi
Today I am grateful for: my ability to see things in perspective, seeing the whole picture, being content to wait
Hello Lovely Girls, Perfect weather yet again!!! I am still stumbling along with one wrapped up finger and keep whacking the wrong key. Never the less, onward!! I liked today's quote because happiness has always been something which due to my illness has eluded me, I have been content, joyful, delighted, entertained, peaceful and lots of other lovely things but ongoing happiness has always seemed to me to be a concept more than an actual state. Not withstanding this difficulty I feel that I have always tried to find the silver lining in an other wise confusing and down right difficult life whilst ****e seems to fall on me at regular intervals. I think it must be the real me that is striving to overcome the daily me who looks for the whole picture and sees that in the end most of this 'stuff' doesn't matter and it is only the things that are really important that count, family, love, knowledge. After all these are the only things we get to keep in the end!!
I am attempting to go back on my 'real' diet today, not sure how I am going to go with the cooking part of it but my finger has healed sufficiently that I can get it wet and just re wrap. So I have a menu planned and I must say that I am soooo  looking forward to eating healthily. I know I enjoy eating what I want but find that after a few days I physiologically just want to eat good food. I think this old dog is learning new tricks.! I hope you all finish off your weekends well and have a good week in front of you. We are in are last week of school holidays and are all still sane and not a lot of yelling has been heard. So thumbs up!!! Love you girls:)

Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

mysterywoman100 on 04/17/2011:
Proud of you girl on wanting to eat the good food and glad your finger is healing.

Em17 on 04/18/2011:
Oh what happened to your finger?

liza36 on 04/18/2011:
Happy belated birthday! Hope you are having a good day.

newme24 on 04/18/2011:
Happy belated birthday! It's been a while... I hope you're doing well!!! Have a great day!

sweetpea1977 on 04/18/2011:
First off, happy belated birthday!! So sorry I missed it!!

Im glad your finger is healing nicely.

Its also great to hear about your desire to eat healthy!! :)

biscottibody59 on 04/18/2011:
Interesting comments you left me--I'll have to think about that! And I'll look up the book--never heard of it as far as I know. Yes health and head go together, IMO. Sometimes it's obvious, sometimes it takes a little detective work:-)

Hope you have a good week!

Maria7 on 04/18/2011:
Happy belated birthday to you! :-)

hopingforhealth on 04/18/2011:
That happens to me too now! It never did when I ate badly, but now when I eat bad food for a stretch, I crave veggies and fruit. I think that's a good sign for both of us. :)

also Happy Belated Birthday!!! Boo on me for missing it :)

sweetpea1977 on 04/18/2011:
Yes, I love to be busy during the workweek. I feel guilty if I sit still for too long. However, I do like to relax on the weekends when all the fam is around (which is why I try to do all the housework during week!) :)

love you!

V on 04/18/2011:
I hope tomorrow you might feel a bit better!! LUB YOU

biscottibody59 on 04/18/2011:
I'm avoiding the estrogen replacement therapy at all costs--something new seems to come out weekly researchwise--usually not to the positive. But, if I started having hot flashes, some symptom that ERT could help for sure or I happened to be turning into the incredible hulk or something like that, I might reconsider:-) Hey I have an open mind--it costs nothing!

Hope your experience when it arrives is as smooth as silk--you've certainly had plenty on your plate with the other things--you deserve a break! You've got me beat--maybe that's my problem, I need to start talking to my body parts--haha!

hopingforhealth on 04/19/2011:
Hey lady! Just popping in to say hi. Thanks for the support last night. You're right, I am lucky to have some good friends!

V on 04/19/2011:
Are you okay?? I haven't heard form you in a few days :( LUB YOU

Supercheese on 04/19/2011:
Just checking in!! and saying haiii!!

h82bfat on 04/20/2011:
I so love your positive attitude! It took me a LONG time to realize that I would make much more progress by focussing in on my accomplisments vs. belaboring my disappointments (though I still have "my days"). WHAT a DIFFERENCE! ~ I'm not sure what your diet was, but I hope you are able to transition back to it seamlessly. Have a great day!

Hackersdiet on 04/20/2011:
Oh, good. I like that you are starting your "real" diet. That is great, because it looks like your weight has plateaued for a while. It will be nice for you to see more progress. You are very motivated and in a good place!

hopingforhealth on 04/20/2011:
Hey Moogs, just checking in :) (do you mind being abbreviated to Moogs? I always want to do it :P) I hope things are going ok.

V on 04/20/2011:
:( I miss you

biscottibody59 on 04/23/2011:
Hope all's well in the land of moogy:-) Happy Easter!

hollybelle on 04/24/2011:
Hey, there - still thinking of you and wondering why you've not posted lately. Just wondering what's up with you. Hope your good weather has held out and you've had a Happy Easter with the princesses!

moogy - Saturday Apr 16, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



A good head and a good heart are always a formidable combination.    Nelson Mandela
Today I am grateful for: people who love me, my Saviour, my faith and strength                                                                        

Hello Lovely Girls, Another sunny fresh day here in Sydney, perfect for my birthday. I didn't go to church today as the princess and the angel are coughing and sneezing all over the place so my daughter took the big boys and I stayed home and babysat. I got lots of cuddles so I am just awaiting the arrival of the sniffles myself. Se la vie!! I didn't post yesterday because I was feeling a little flat, this not being able to drive is really getting to me. It isn't as if I drive as lot anyway, but actually not being able too is  making me feel like an old lady. I mean I would like to go to the plant nursery and get some new plants for my balcony, I would like to get my hair cut, you know have a meander around the mall. My daughter is too busy even though she would drive me, I feel it is an inconvenience even if she says she doesn't mind. She has enough on her plate with the four children, her course work and all the health issues she deals with. I am just going to have to pull up my big girl panties and suck it up princess. There are people in a lot worse situations than mine. I am planning on snuggling under my warm blanket today to hopefully fend of any lurking bugs from downstairs and watch movies. My eating is a little on the blah side as well. I am not eating a lot, just not the best stuff. I had to buy prepared food due to my cut finger (who knew how wet your hand gets when you are trying to cook). Never mind, I dare say in a couple of days I will be able to get back to my wholefood diet, she says with her gammy fingers crossed!!!! Have a wonderful weekend girls. Love you!!


Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

V on 04/16/2011:
Happy Birthday Moogy :) Lub YOU!!

Supercheese on 04/16/2011:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOOGALICIOUS!!!!!!! Hope it was amazing!!!!

hollybelle on 04/17/2011:
Happy Birthday,Sherone!!

Umpqua on 04/17/2011:
Happy Birthday!!

h82bfat on 04/17/2011:
Happy Birthday!

V on 04/17/2011:
I only wish that I could stop by to cut your hair...Free of charge of course ;)

chidogs on 04/17/2011:
Happy Birthday, Moogy. Hope you get a chance to get out and about soon! And keep those germs away. Hugs.

nita51 on 04/17/2011:
Happy Birthday :) PCs been down Just got it up an running today. What a coincidence!!! love you

moogy - Thursday Apr 14, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



Love is the foundation from which your decisions about your life should be made.  Darren L. Johnson
Today I am grateful for: living in peace, access to plenty of food, clean water to drink
Hello Lovely Girls, It is another lovely morning here, although I have broken out my throw over electric blanket, I is getting a little too chilly in the mornings and I am not putting the heater on just for a couple of hours. You were all so gentle and kind is your comments yesterday re: my relationship with my husband. So, just to clear up a few questions/matters. No, he doesn't have a girlfriend (I think he tried to have a girlfriend once but it didn't work out - a matter a desperate woman and a lonely man, I know who she was, no competition!!), I realise that being in my mid fifties doesn't mean my life is over. However, I am a married woman and in love with my husband and would never even dream of even thinking about another relationship. Even if I was free to do so I would never bother with a man again, I don't believe they are worth the effort required! Before we separated we talked to both physiologist and physiatrist to try and work things out, in fact we talked so much that I think he just clammed up and hasn't talked since!!!! Dealing with me means he has to deal with his own monsters in the wardrobe and he doesn't have the emotional reserves to do that. As for moving on, I figure if I was going to move on any further than I have I would have done so by now. What am I suppose to be moving on to? A new man, no thank you. Like I said yesterday I am in the middle of a love story, and the heroine doesn't just say "I am moving on" she waits patiently and with anticipation for her lover to return. She lets love be the foundation on which all her life decisions are made. I was a princess for thirty years and just because the prince has got himself lost doesn't change the fact that I am his princess. (He used to wake every morning and say "Morning princess") I am holding out for something real that I know exists and will be given back to me. Real love takes courage, patience, endurance and understanding, I have all those qualities and one day my husband will be overwhelmed with the joy he feels at the power of my love.
I had an average eating day yesterday, mainly due to the lack of being able to use my right hand, I managed two bowls of cereal and two pieces of spicy fruit loaf, oh! and a few choc chips, I typed that really quickly in the hope you wouldn't notice!!!!!LOL Love you girls, have a wonderful day and don't forget to show the people you love how much you love them. Love is precious and fragile and needs to be cared for. I will be 55 on Sunday, I can feel the wisdom descending on me as I type!!!!! LOL


Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

loveray on 04/14/2011:
just wanted to stop by and say i love you. i hope you are doing ok today. just scanned your last couple of entries. i didnt realize you had been separated for 10 years. you have such a good attitude that things will come back together if they are meant to be. he must be a VERY lucky man to have the love and devotion from someone as amazing as you! lots of love.

V on 04/14/2011:
Moogy??? Now surely you didn't think "eagle eye" would miss the chocolate chips...LOL So any big plans for your big day??? I imagine the little princess will want to hang out with you and bask in the lime light with ya!!! LUB YOU

V on 04/14/2011:
LOL!!! Haha and yes I am not getting my hopes up...I think I am reasonable as far as standards, there is NO WAY I am lowering them!! LOl He doesn't have to perfect, but the right fit for ME ;)

biscottibody59 on 04/14/2011:
RYC: Peachy, just peachy. Not. I may or may not "un private" my entry later.

If you don't make an entry before your big day--HaPpY BiRtHdAy moogy baby!:-)

ps I appreciate your explanation above--keep on keepin' on!

sweetpea1977 on 04/14/2011:
Happy early birthday Moogy! Love you!!

And yes, I saw the chocolate chips too!! ;)

chidogs on 04/14/2011:
Oh a birthday coming up. I hope it is a joyful one for you! So far as needing a nudge up the backside......no, I couldn't do it to you, not with that cut hand. :). I appreciate your sharing more details of your remarkable love story. And I hope you get your forever after ending too! Hugs.

waydesmommy on 04/15/2011:
Happy early Birthday I hope it's a great one for you!

Umpqua on 04/15/2011:
I hope you have a fantastic birthday! And spicy fruit loaf sounds super yummy (so do the choc chips ;) Have a good one!

hollybelle on 04/15/2011:
Well, girl - you ARE the Princess. These are the most romantic two posts (yesterday & today) I've ever seen. I will be 57 in October this year - we are only as old as we feel. Most days that's not too old for me, but some days.....LOL! SIGH! Love to you on your birthday and always.

KathyBlue on 04/15/2011:
You are a wise princess indeed... :-) The only person calling me princess is my Pilates professor, and she's a woman, LOL... Funny, I think the same about men, they just don't worth the effort required... and I'm 29 here, LOL... There's an option called women, thanks but no thanks :D

KathyBlue on 04/15/2011:
Happy early birthday, I'm sure it'll be a good one, followed by a lot more :)

greengirl on 04/15/2011:
I'll add my birthday wishes to all the rest and say many happy returns of the day :-)

mysterywoman100 on 04/15/2011:
Happy Birthday weather is weird her yesterday it was almost 80 today 46 a cold front moved in and there were tonadoes all around us. No bad weather here though some thunder but no wind or even rain.

mysterywoman100 on 04/15/2011:
I also want to say I am sorry for sticking my nose in your business. Only you know your life and after 3 divorces I am not 1 to give love advise, only know what kind of works for me.

biscottibody59 on 04/16/2011:
Happy Birthday on YOUR day!

moogy - Wednesday Apr 13, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



The richest love is that which submits to the arbitration of time.  Lawrence Durrell
Today I am grateful for: enduring love, a strong and undefeated heart, the joy that awaits me in the future
Hello Lovely Girls, it is chilly here today, the sun is shining so it will warm up later. I hope that your temperatures are rising to a more pleasing range wherever you are. I found today's quote and immediately knew I would have to use it. I met my husband when I was 15 and he was 16 and that was it. I was talking to some friends when he walked around a corner, he was wearing white Levi's and a white Levi jacket, he stopped walking and I stopped talking, our eyes locked and it was as if time had stopped. We married when I was 18 and he was 19 and are now in our mid fifties. Slight problem is that we have been separated for nearly 10 years - it is due to emotional problems that he is unable to deal with from his childhood complicated by foolish mistakes he has made and military service. I feel as if I am living a love story, but it is the bit in the middle when the lovers are parted and yearn for each other. Yes, I know, it all sounds a bit wacky!! However, it doesn't seem to matter how much I try to rationalize with myself and get to grips with reality. I know in my heart that he still loves me and I love him. Circumstances have conspired to separate us. I believe that families are forever and that we will be together when we leave this world and our love story will continue without all the problems and pain. So for now I submit to the arbitration of time and trust in my own understanding and the confirmations I have received through prayer. This love story will have a happy ending. The fact that every time we see each other their is electricity in the air and he always asks my daughter how I am is a pretty good indication that the connection survives.
I had a reasonable eating day yesterday marred only my a late night battle with some small packets of chips I keep for the children. Fortunately they are not very nice and I managed to keep it down to only three. A small victory. I am just meandering along here staying under the radar (the calorie radar) but without the enthusiasm that I had prior to the seizure. I think I may be a little depressed (more than the usually Dysthymia depressed), it is sometimes hard to work out what is going on inside my brain. Know I don't know if the seizure has affected how I am thinking as well. Can sometime please lead me to the exit, I am getting sick and tired of myself now. I find sick/ill/incapacitated people really boring and I seem to be turning into one. I walked out of the house yesterday and my daughter had to pull down my top which had got stuck in the back of my bra. I am turning into a old lady before I am ready!!!!! Yikes!! Next stop incontinence pads!!!!!!! Well after that little ramble I am sure no one wants to swap their life with mine. I will continue to find joy in the beauty of nature and the beauty and endless delights of my grandchildren. I will also continue to enjoy my time with you and enjoy your successes, failures, struggles and lives as we all deal with what life throws at us and we do the best we can to juggle the balls. Fortunately as women, our strength, commitment, desire and compassion help us through life's pitfalls with grace, serenity and friendships. Love you girls:)
Yesterday's Food
weetbix, skim milk, xylitol
2 CAMP muesli bars
dark chocolate
3 very little bags of chips (really, very little!!!!!)

Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

~Moody~ on 04/13/2011:
You know~Your story of you and your husband made me smile~I'm sorry things aren't differnt, so you could be together, but you seem to have come to peace with the way things are..and I believe with all my heart that families are forever too, and you will have eternity together...

Had to LOL at the whole shirt stuck in the bra thing...LOL..sorry but that's just funny!!!!!

~Moody~ on 04/13/2011:
You know~Your story of you and your husband made me smile~I'm sorry things aren't differnt, so you could be together, but you seem to have come to peace with the way things are..and I believe with all my heart that families are forever too, and you will have eternity together...

Had to LOL at the whole shirt stuck in the bra thing...LOL..sorry but that's just funny!!!!!

~Moody~ on 04/13/2011:
You know~Your story of you and your husband made me smile~I'm sorry things aren't differnt, so you could be together, but you seem to have come to peace with the way things are..and I believe with all my heart that families are forever too, and you will have eternity together...

Had to LOL at the whole shirt stuck in the bra thing...LOL..sorry but that's just funny!!!!!

V on 04/13/2011:
Moogy I am sure it is really hard to deal with, especially feeling if you have no control over ant of the issues you just addressed..I am sure the hardest part is seeing him(although I think you might make yourself scarce when your husband is around)when he comes over to see your daughter and children...I am sure that he feels the same way seeing as though he doesn't want to divorce :( Why the hell doesn't he just come out with it, talk it over?? I'm sorry, just thinking out loud..Men are so oblivious at times..Moogy I really wish that he might tell you that he still loves you,especially now that you need him the most....

V on 04/13/2011:
RYC I would LOVE and be Proud to be a Marine but my knee is shot, they would never take me :( I would be a mighty fine soldier, special forces of course ;) LUB YOU!!

sweetpea1977 on 04/13/2011:
I am so with V. I wish he would just man up and talk to you!

Sending lots of love your way!

Maria7 on 04/13/2011:
Hello to you, Moogy. Watch out for those chips! Sometimes they pack a lot of calories! :-D (Said with love.)

mysterywoman100 on 04/14/2011:
I have had 3 bad marriages but still like the company of men. I have learned I have to be the aggressive 1 alot of times. You know call them and tell them I would like to go out. If they dont get the hint ask them over for dinner. Can I ask does he have a girlfriend? If so just move on with your life and dont wait for him. I have been divorced from my last husband 8 yrs and although I think he was my soulmate We were not happy living together. We have a daughter together and are still friends but that is all it will ever be. By the way I feel like you 54 and getting older everyday thank God.

Umpqua on 04/14/2011:
I'm with Sweetpea and V and wish you could talk things out. Men can be so dense sometimes! I feel that you're young and have so many good years ahead of you (no adult diapers yet!) I'm glad that you have made peace with this though. I hope you have a good one today!

chidogs on 04/14/2011:
Aw Moogy, your story is so romantic and touching. Very few of us get to have that deep a connection. Even if you are apart now, cherish that. And I really hope, like the others here, that you can eventually talk it out with him. Take care of yourself. Hugs.

legcramps on 04/14/2011:
One day at a time moogy. Keep your chin up :)

biscottibody59 on 04/14/2011:
Hmm interesting entry. You thoughts are clear, but there's a lot to be said for moving on. Here's hoping whatever form that takes for you that you feel the power to do so. (And I don't mean moving on to the hereafter!)

Enjoy your day!

greengirl on 04/14/2011:
Hey Moogy I'm mid fifties too but decided a long time ago that I would grow old disgracefully !! Lol !! You are young at heart :-) Your husband is a part of your life because you have a daughter together and that will never change.

moogy - Tuesday Apr 12, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend. Albert Camus
Today I am grateful for: trees, gentle sun, my beautiful granddaughters
Hello Lovely Girls, Another lovely morning here in Sydney. It was the princesses sleepover last night, didn't go to badly although she did try to cuddle me to death!! Not a bad way to go I suppose!! I can see a nana nap in my future this afternoon.  The big boys arrive home today and the princess goes. It is like musical children because it is the school holidays for the next two weeks. I will just love who is here, mind you losing the princess is like losing 75% of the demands, difficulties and general noise. You wouldn't believe how disruptive this delightful little girl can be, so beautiful and clever but really lives up to her name. The other three are easier to care for than she is!! I suppose that is what you get from having royalty in the family!!!!! The angel and her mom just came up because they had caught a kangaroo mouse in the house, they are just like ordinary mice only smaller and with great big back feet (just like a kangaroo) and hop around. We suspect it has eaten some poison that we keep down is secret places, so a little sad, the angel said that she wanted to hold it and her mom told her she couldn't and she said " It scared of me", so cute. Her mom told her yes, because she was so big.
I had a pretty good day yesterday, managed to slice a piece of my right finger on my right hand off and now I am bandaged up. I knew cleaning would end in calamity sooner or later!!!! LOL I don't know if it isn't one thing it is another. It is so frustrating because it is taking ages to type this and correct all the errors I keep making. I can get it wet for a couple of days. Rats!!! I makes it hard to cook, wash up and wash me.  I am sure I will manage. LOL I have a quiet day planned, no baking because there are no afternoon teas for a couple of weeks, so just a little cleaning and figuring out how to feed myself with only one hand. I am sure where there is a will there is a way. Thank you for all your support about my tests and ongoing medical stuff, it is lovely to have people who care about what happens to me. You really are a wonderful group of women. I love each of you who come and read my entries.:)
Yesterday's Food
weetbix, skim milk, xylitol
seasoned chicken thigh, mashed potato, peas, gravy
chocolate walnut brownie

Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

V on 04/12/2011:
The kangaroo rat sounds scary!!!! Now should I ask what you were doing with the knife??? I cut my fingers all the time(not paying attention enough) LOl and until recently I never have a supply of band aids, I always tend to forget to purchase them...I resorted to using SUPERGLUE??? LOL WTF LOL I kinda like the Princess'style but what ever are you gonna do with her when she becomes a teen???I shudder to think! LOl LUB YOU :)

V on 04/12/2011:
Unfortunately I know all too well about the dangers of spiders, I was bitten in the corner of my eye while I slept and woke up looking like the Elephant Man...It is crazy how something so small can be so dangerous...The left side of my face was 7 times bigger than the right, thank god I got to the ER before my head exploded....Okay when I visit I will admire your yard from afar...LOL

hopingforhealth on 04/12/2011:
Yikes about that kangeroo mouse! I am caught up on your entries and I'm sorry the EEG was frustrating. I totally hear you! When I had to do mine a few years ago I stayed up the whole night, was so tired, and then was too uncomfortable to really sleep much during the test too. I dunno how they think you can sleep in a place attached to a bunch of machines! I will keep my fingers crossed for your next appt too. :)

chidogs on 04/12/2011:
Moogy, your poor finger! That had to hurt. And yeah, doing stuff one handed is really annoying. We had what we called kangaroo rats when I lived in the desert. You would see them hopping across vacant desert lots. I haven't seen one in years now. Other than the finger, you sound very chipper! Enjoy the small ones. Hugs.

Umpqua on 04/13/2011:
With all the rodent issues we've had in this house and our rental house, I feel no sympathy for the little buggers. Our cats have been catching them now, so we're letting them take care of the job. That stinks about your finger, I hope it heals quickly!

lolla on 04/13/2011:
Thanks for your kind words. Hoping your hand heals fast.Hugs.

starfish on 04/13/2011:
awww, sorry to hear about your finger. I hope you have a lovely day :-)

hopingforhealth on 04/13/2011:
Hey moogy! I guess I'm a bit early for you tonight. I'll check back later :)

moogy - Monday Apr 11, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool.   Jane Wagner
Today I am grateful for: the smell of newly mow grass, friends who come to the rescue, generosity of heart
Hello Lovely Girls, I is another beautiful Autumn day, the sun is shining and I am feeling good. We have had problems with the lawn cutting since my SIL went on his sabbatical!!!. The lawn mower broke and my daughter can't afford to have the lawn mown. So we have been borrowing a mower or the lady over the road had done it. Well, about ten minutes ago, two big angels from church (good friends) just arrived and started mowing, no announcement, just started work. I have a little framed saying on my sideboard which says " When we are doing His work, we are His hands", too often we pray and hope for help. More often than not the help is provided by human angels who perform random acts of kindness. I could just go down and hug them, they would be embarrassed, my daughter is in tears through gratitude. The real blessing of this is that they are giving us the lawn mower!!! My heart is full!!
Well, onto the medical procedure, I managed to stay awake until 1am and then couldn't sleep until 1.30, woke up at 2.30 and stayed awake until 4am, reset the alarm until 6am and woke at 5.45am. Feeling like death warmed up I immediately threw off the covers to keep my cold and awake. It was a nightmare of a night. After all that I couldn't go to sleep during the EEG, I drifted a couple of times but it was to noisy to go to sleep. I mean, I could have done that after a good night's sleep anyway!!!! Grrrrr!! I haven't got a follow up appointment until the 23rd May. That is one of the disadvantages to living on the edge of the city limits, some rare condition specialists only come for one day a week and off course my neurologist only comes out here on Mondays. Anyway, I am going to try to put it out of my mind until necessary, still getting dizzy spells so am moving slowly and holding the balustrade when going downstairs. I am back to healthy eating and listing my food for perusal. I choose the quote on purpose today as I can feel that I have put on weight and have no intention of getting on the scale until I feel as if I have lost weight. Working on the principle that I can delude myself into thinking I have only put on a few pounds (I suspect more!!).
Sorry I didn't post yesterday, I slept most of the day and was pretty tired even when I woke. I slept for 12 hours last night. Feeling full of beans this morning (well, that is an exaggeration, maybe full of rice!!! which is pretty good for me anyway). I hope that you have a great day for your Tuesday. Love you girls.
Yesterday's Food
weetbix, skim milk, xylitol
banana peanut protein smoothie
2 CAMP muesli bars
macaroni cheese and peas

Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

getmebackto150 on 04/11/2011:
sorry to hear your test did not go that well... So frustrating!!! I totally agree with your quote, when I know I have gone astray, I need to delude myself and not step on the scale until I have been very good for quite a while... I think its a good strategy!! I hope you have a great day Moogy!

V on 04/11/2011:
Hello Moogy My love!! I missed you! It is great to have my life back again :) It is wonderful to hear that some good Karma has been sent to you and Donna :) You will be pleased to know that I was on my best behavior...Kinda ;) LOL LuB YOU

loveray on 04/11/2011:
aww i hope you are feeling better!! i missed you mucho. you are probably right about the dizziness - i had a smoothie early on for lunch and was waiting for dinner - plus I was a little dehydrated because it was SO hot here that day. also, standing for long periods of time for me is now getting difficult and i start feeling like im going to fall over. i feel a bit better now. lots of love!

lifestylechange on 04/11/2011:
Have a great day!!! Glad you are back:) xo

Umpqua on 04/12/2011:
I'm glad that test is finally over and done with. And wonderful news on the lawn mowing and mower, it's so inspiring when people practice random acts of kindness! Have a good one!

KathyBlue on 04/12/2011:
Glad you're here :) 12 hours sleep sounds good. I do that, from time to time!

legcramps on 04/12/2011:
Have a good day moogy :)

chidogs on 04/12/2011:
Hi Moogy. Good to hear you got that test over with. Hopefully they got enough info that you won't need to do it again. I am so glad about the wonderful angels that mowed the lawn and handed over the lawn mower! Hugs to them all. And to you.

hollybelle on 04/12/2011:
Gee that test sounded tough! Glad it's over and hope they can tell you something helpful! Wonderful news about the mower. Angels, indeed! "God works in mysterious ways his wonders to achieve"!

biscottibody59 on 04/12/2011:
Glad you got your lawn mowed!

Hope you slept/dozed off enough to get some results! I had a sleep study and had a few electrodes on my head and a ton of others everywhere else--arms, legs, torso and didn't think I'd be able to sleep. Luckily I only had to go through it once and had a very savvy tech.

Hope you have a good Wednesday and not too much dizziness! Keep on keepin' on!

moogy - Saturday Apr 09, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.    Henry Ellis
Today I am grateful for: my Saviour, the promises He has made to me, living with a hopeful heart
Hello Lovely Girls, We have a saying in Australia, beautiful one day, perfect the next. Now this is suppose to refer to the summer but I prefer to use it for the weather this time of year and yes yesterday was beautiful and today looks perfect. Today's quote really touched my heart and I thought that it really summed up my life for the past ten years. Although I haven't mastered the letting go part and don't feel that I want to let go of such a great love. I think that I do the mingling of the holding on and the letting go, how could one go on living if one didn't let go a little so that you could get one with what was left of one's life. I think I will have to write that one down in my little quote book.
It is so quite in the house and the only sound outside are the birds calling to each other. There was a bit of a party the other side of our block last night, playing old R & B, so that was fine and anyway it was all quiet by 11pm so I presume there were children in the house. It is a very family orientated suburb, so in the main it is pretty quiet. I was just grateful that they weren't playing hip hop or anything slightly resembling it!!!!! Anyway to you weekend girls, I hope that you are enjoying your Saturday night and that you have a wonderful Sunday, manage to get some rest and spend it with people you love. Love you girls:)

Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

loveray on 04/09/2011:
im glad you got some peace and quiet!! i hope that you have a wonderful weekend and get some good rest. glad to hear you are feeling better - seems like your spirits have been up the past couple days. xo

Hackersdiet on 04/10/2011:
I'm glad you are having nice weather. Enjoy it! You sound quite content and that is good to hear.

biscottibody59 on 04/10/2011:
Sounds like a good day and fairly nice weather--hope you're well today!

Maria7 on 04/10/2011:
I heard someone on tv talking recently, sound Australian, and I thought of you. I LOVE to hear Australians talk. :-D

Umpqua on 04/10/2011:
It sounds like you had a wonderful weekend, I hope it's a great week for you!

nemogirl on 04/10/2011:
Have you read "The Time Traveler's Wife"? I took almost a year to complete it because it dealt with the very matter of your quote today, and I simply can't wrap myself around it. It was such a touching and tender novel and it seemed to really capture that feeling of not wanting to let go but not having much choice.

liza36 on 04/11/2011:
Good luck on Monday with the EEG. Hope all goes well.

moogy - Friday Apr 08, 2011
(staying in control of my eating behaviour)
Weight: 232.7



I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.  Groucho Marx
Today I am grateful for: my lovely warm bed, a quiet house, being able to do whatever I want
Hello Lovely Girls, The sun is shining gently, the birds are singing, I just left my warm bed and am now sitting in a winter nightie with my slippers on and seriously thinking about breaking out my throw over electric blanket. I already have my electric blanket on my bed and find that I need to keep it on low all through the night (but I think that might be an age thing - whatever, its lovely!), it is quite chilly. I am loving it!! The house is very quiet all the children are with their dad until Monday night, he is taking them up to his parents up the coast because it is their Grandma's birthday. So bliss has once again descended. He very kindly offered to keep them on Monday because of my EEG. I have been practicing staying up late this week and actually managed to make it to 11.45pm last night, which for me is like partying until 4am in the morning. Problem was I didn't wake up until 8.30am. I can see that this is going to be a tricky little proposition stay up until 1am and get up at 5am, Ummmmm!!! I don't drink coffee and am not allowed to have any chocolate in the morning either, it said so on the instruction sheet (they obviously know women well!!!). Now that I am depriving myself of sleep, well, not really, but going to bed way past my bedtime, I am thinking that even if I get up at 6am, I will still managed to get to sleep at 9am (the time the test is scheduled) I mean I am usually slightly somnambulant anyway due to the Dysthymia. I will be glad to get it out of the way.
I am sorry that I didn't get to your diaries yesterday and will attempt to get to my regular team today. I am feeling less dizzy, mind you I have only walked from the bedroom to the lounge!! LOL It is Saturday morning here is Sydney so Friday night where you are. Have a good evening and a great weekend. Love you girls.

Progress as of today: 28.6 lbs lost so far, only 57.7 lbs to go!

Maria7 on 04/08/2011:
Hey, Girl! Sounds like you are sooooooo COMFY!!! My Hubby and I are over here, watching the news on tv, which is showing a clock on screen with a countdown until possible government shutdown at midnite tonite. I'm glad to read that you are feeling somewhat better. Hope you are having a good evening/day (mixed up on Australia time). :-)

getmebackto150 on 04/08/2011:
you souind like you are having fabulous weather (for you anyway!) good luck at figuring out how to stay awake... YIKES!! Have a good one and enjoy the peace and quiet!

biscottibody59 on 04/08/2011:
I hope you're sufficiently sleep deprived by the time the test gets here--I don't think I've ever cheered someone on in pursuit of sleep deprivation:-) I hope it all works to get you a good evaluation--the important thing. (I'll take your portion of coffee and chocolate.)

Thanks for your comments--your votes of confidence help to make me feel like I'm doing the right thing, and anymore I just have to pinch myself sometimes. I'm not completely out of the woods by any means, but I'll take being "somewhat lost" in the forest to being "completely in the dark" in the forest.

Take it easy and stay warm!

loveray on 04/08/2011:
im glad you are feeling better today!! i missed you a lot. xoxo

nemogirl on 04/09/2011:
I love the changes in the weather, too. I find them exciting, really. Also, I happen to love being warm and I just love toasted blankets! But, good luck on your tests and sleeping and things. It will be over before you know it. Hopefully the testers and doctors will put as much thought into your results as you have into taking the darn thing!

lifestylechange on 04/09/2011:
Yes....there is a saying here in Montana.... "April snows will freeze your toes and the only May Flowers we see, are TRUCKS" LOL As in the MAYFLOWERS moving trucks... HAHA!

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