Comment left by thatmochagirl on 05/29/2001: Don't beat yourself up You can easily get back on track... YOu CAN DO IT>>> Have a good day!!!

Comment left by misseve on 05/30/2001: Hey Rachel :) Thanks for your comments, to be honest I was quite flattered! First of all congrats to you for starting and signing up here. Sorry that sounds corny and I'm sure tons of other ppl have already said it to you, but it really takes effort to start a journal. DD has been great because it keeps me on my toes cuz I know if I mess up, I can get support and keep on going. A bit about me... I'm 19 going on 20 in september. I've been overweight since... well my whole life literally. To make a long story short, I was raised by my grandparents since my parents both worked f/t long-hour jobs. We all lived under the same apt. (an asian thing... i think to have your grandparents live with you, esp for my mom who had to put up with her in-laws!!!) anyway... so they thought "hey babies are cute when they are chubby!!" so they would literally force-feed me (like give me 2 bottles of milk rather than 1...) so that as i was growing up i developed the habit of overeating. food is a big deal in chinese culture cuz as my mom told me... we express our love in the form of gifts and in this case - food!! yea we don't hug and say "i love you" and all that stuff you see on tv. :) well unless you're in a romantic relationship.... that's another story.

oh oh funny story my mom told me yesterday actually - when i was 7 she told my grandpa "okay you can take her for an ice cream, but just a kiddie (child-size) cone." so he ends up buying me 2 kiddie cones!! haha. i still love my grandparents, cuz i know they mean well but they didn't know better and it only hurt me in the long run. :P anyway short story became a long story, oops sorry hehe.

i'm very interested to hear where you came from with your weight problem. i hope you stick with it, because i've been trying to diet since i was around 10. i'd try and eat sensibly and hit the gym more... only to overexercise myself resulting to binging ONCE again. oh the stories... but i think you're sick of me ranting on and on and on :) i've only REALLY stuck with a consistent diet since may 1st (we picked a nice round start date) but lemme tell you i've felt better already. may not be as much so physically... sure i've toned with exercise, but that will take time, i've accepted that. but i've felt so much better about myself... and i think i'm actually a happier person now! sometimes i would look in the mirror for literally hours and just SULK. but i look, and acceptance is the thought that comes to mind rather than shame. i think admitting and accepting yourself for who you are is the first step, instead of dreaming about how you will one day be a size 4, trust me my dear that never works. :)

anyway hope to talk to you soon, if you have icq we can chat there (#967825) it sounds like you're prolly only 1 or 2 years younger than me. (younger sibling = 16, older = 19...) that's cool i'd love to talk to someone my age :)not that i don't like talking to the other ladies here, but there's just more to relate to sometimes. :)

phew that was a long msg. gotta get back to work, cya.

Comment left by Zeppy on 06/01/2001: How's this week been for you? Mine's bit not good. I'm sick (flu bug). And when you're physically weak you're mentally weak and it makes making good food choices all the more difficult. I hate it! Haven't really eaten that much lately. But when I do eat it's too much of the wrong stuff. Yeah, I've been to Melbourne. I lived there for 14 years until last September when I came up here. When I'm down next we should meet up and go riding! I'm thinking of doing a tri training clinic in mid August. It's in Werribee I think. Where abouts are you? Hey, I so much want to go out and buy a road bike. I got on the one that I've been lent but haven't been able to adjust the seat height yet. My brother tried to find an allen key that would unscrew it but was unsuccessful. But, maybe dad will have better luck - I'll ask him to help me this weekend. I'm so excited about riding since that RPM class earlier in the week. And I found a cycle club around my area. Would be ace if I could join and race/train with them. Don't know if there are many females in the club, but hey who cares? Keep in touch.