Welcome to Diet Diaries.com

 I'm having trouble with the story I'm telling as I can't write on my cell phone so after I noticed the mushroom container washed that I just put the cooked food in, I asked wgeee the food was and the aunt says she re salvaged the mushrooms into the pasta dish she made on the stove !  So thank gosh I took some of what I made to the store Bc she used the entire thing I made to mix with pasta, tomato sauce and some cheese!!!!

i was shocked and frustrated she used the full thing and didn't leave me any. But this is the aunt - very mean and angey human being also on vaca and Rosie's house with her daughter till sometime Thursday it seems.

shes just thoughtless...and I a man starting to not give a F about even talking to her. I am nice to her and it causes her to be more rude and step over bounds.

i refuse to buy more food till she leaves.

what she made is actually nice if you like pasta Bc She I think added White bean soup too.

the point is simply She didn't think to ask or say she'd use it?

like you all know, i don't list pasta or even a pasta with veggies as a usual goodnite so Iran just shock when I saw what she turned my food into. 

But I didn't actually buy the veggies - for the particular mushroom dish I made. I made it to use the ingredients specifically Bc they have been in the fridge the whole time and I didnt want them to spoil. So I made what I like and to share only with the nice people - I said nothing to the aunt about it - she watched me slicing a thousand mushrooms though.

I am not angry as I didn't but buy the veggies and it was creative to see how she totally took my stuff and out it it into hers.

the annoying thing is she just assumed it'd be ok to use my work for hers.

kombucha  all new brands and flavors here ! 60

Banana and coffee 190, orange 100

INoon Lunch my mushroom dish 100? Wrap 60 salami 40 egg70 avocado is 80 350

Snack coffee and a tasty protein bar 250

coffee and cookies 350, chocolate and more real cookie 250

1550...

pool and gym today.

In morning I washed towels and cooked up some veggies rosie had in her fridge before they went to waste. I used garlic which I individually sliced up and then a huge amount of mushrooms that I washed and cut and decided to use the remainder of the spinach before it went bad.

I finished it around 11am and was super happy. I took a little bit to the pool with me around noon to have with a sandwich I made of food I bought.

i sat at pool from 12-1:30.

i came back to check on towels which someone took outta dryer and put away.

i noticed that my veggie container of all the mushrooms was washed and dried.

Today was so mind-numbing -- the weather, the job, my mood, my physical self (still feels like I'm fighting something, may be hormonally linked) -- even my clothese were grey today.

But I did manage to do some things for myself that were good.  I did the mouthwash thing again after lunch.  Also practiced portion control with the ranch salad dressing for my afternoon vegetables snack.  I don't measure, but it was just a little bit over 1 TBSP.  

One thing that I'm especially proud of happened Monday night.  After I rode my bike, I took off my FitBit.  Got distracted... then did a bunch of walking around the house to clean up before bed. Upstairs, downstairs, upstairs, downstairs, back and forth.  Then when I was upstairs for good, I realized that none of those steps counted because I had left the FitBit in the basement.  UGH!!!  I had a moment where I was quite distraught and discouraged -- mostly discouraged -- but then I realized that the important thing is that I was doing the walking, not whether or not FitBit was counting those steps or not.  So I calmed myself down and took pride in knowing that exercise still counts, even if it's not being counted (by the FitBit).  

I'm hoping to get to bed early tonight.  Not sure if it's the feeling blah, feeling tired, tired of feeling blah, or the blahness of feeling tired.

Good scales this morning...I think I was up at least 4 or 5 times last night.....rings were not loose at all last night...but this morning I can't keep them in place ( they nest together but are not attached to each other.. it is kind of annoying when they keep spinning around....)  If I ever stop holding onto water...i will probably have to get spacers put back in them.......took those off them years ago. 

I think it will be a paperwork day.......things are piling up and now I can't find my life insurance info..so time to get things filed correctly again.

2 cups coffee with coconut creamer

Just Crack an Egg ( surprisingly good, only picked up 2 because I had good coupons but it was better than I expected)

 Smoked sausage

mixed veggies and mini bow tie pasta ( schwans)...I should never have prepared the whole bag at once...this will take a couple more days to use up

toasted english muffin with butter

orange

coconut yogurt

another piece of smoked sausage

terra vegetable chips

quaker sandwich minis pb pomegranate

cappucinno k cup

Friday got the girl and went to her orthodontist appointment. We then go to the Disney on Ice - it was ok, probably won't ever go again, they are all pretty much the same. But the girl had fun. She said her mouth was kinda of sore.

Saturday - DH had to work, the girl had a friend over and DH brought home pizza.

Sunday - I did laundry, and cooked dinner (beef and brocolli, teriaki chicken and rice). The girl's mouth was still very sore - more sore than she thought it would be.

Monday - DH and I go shopping - moved stuff from a metal rack, baker's rack and microwave cart into the new cabinets. Here are the new cabinet additions - very happy with them.

BEFORE                                                                        New cabinet (left - added) - current cabinet (right) - color match

AFTER (the electrical outlet in the Before picture was moved up to be used on the counter top.

The counter top was measured today and will be installed in two weeks - this granit counter top will also be installed over the existing cabinets as well.

Also spent a good amount of time trying to get the new puppy to understand he has to go outside and potty!!

I call them Fat Man and Little Boy - ok just kidding - Steve (left) - Rocco (right)

I received a message from my boss to come into work for Tuesday and Wednesday

Tuesday - work

B: cinnamon role

L: chili cheese tots

S: belvita, balanced breaks

D: not sure yet

I have to get the girl tonight - no plans

Forecast is snow, snow, snow this weekend - not looking forward to it.

Have a grea night IP!

THIS WEEK:

MONDAY - Work 8-4; 5 hours, 58 minutes

TUESDAY - Work 8-4; Coach 4:30-8:00;  7 hours, 49 minutes

WEDNESDAY - Work 8-4 

THURSDAY - Work 8-4   

FRIDAY - Work 8-4; Coach 4:30-6:30  

SATURDAY - Trip to see family

SUNDAY - Trip to see family

I had a good sleep last night, but still woke up this morning with heavy congestion and coughing fits. But in the grand scheme, I do feel much better.

I didn't make the chicken parm last night; I had a peanut butter sandwich instead and then munched on some chips before bed. I just didn't have the energy to cook (and then clean) after working all day. No biggie. I'll make it up tomorrow.

I have to coach today after work, and this is the first time I can say that I'm not looking forward to it, simply because I feel so lethargic. I'm sure once I get into it, it will be fine. But then, sleep!

Yesterday went ok.  No big swings either way.  

The family has used up the majority of the simple / refined carb stuff in the house and have switched to a lower carb approach now. 

Personally I've cut out the grapefruit about a week ago and just ate my last oatmeal packet yesterday.  Still have about 12 more packets of my microwave popcorn left.  The wife and girls occasionally eat it, so I'm guessing it will be gone by the end of the week.  Not enjoying the lower carb push right now, but will continue as long as the wife wants to experiment.  While I don't enjoy it as much, low-carb eating is usually pretty good at helping me lower the scale number.  It's not due to the "magic" of low-carb eating, but rather due to my losing interest in the foods I tend to eat while on that type of plan.  The only exception to that might be cheese.  I can over-eat cheese as long as there are some interesting choices in the house.  Because of that, haven't been buying the types of cheeses that I tend to enjoy the most (blue cheese, 18 month aged gouda).

So today is just more of the same.  

Wish I could get interested in weight lifting / muscle building again.  But "wishing" is as far as I'm motivated to go right now.  I'm watching my youngest daughter slowly get better at her walk-overs and walking on her hands.  She keeps practicing almost nightly and is seeing slow progress.  I'm reminded that if I would just start something small now, it would reap tangible benefits by summer-time.  But then I go back to deciding that it's just not something I feel like doing right now......

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16

........................................................

Good morning to you.

  Cold morning here. 

 Calories were about 1700 yesterday.  

 Dear diary. My weigh in yesterday was the same as last week. 270 lb. I quit eating the junk and am overcompensating on the good stuff I guess. I'm really struggling to find the time to post here I'm trying to do it on Mondays. Still drinking two bottles of water every day. Have been doing a lot of Warehouse walking instead of the treadmill.  I'm waiting for some warmer weather to do some work around the house. Hope everyone has a healthy day!

 Kombucha 150, candies 100

Wrap and salami and avocado egg 350

Orange 100

wrap 100 egg 100 avocado 150 350

gelato 250

Big dinner lots of collard greens 400, green beans and bacon 100, turkey 200

2050, tops 

3day 2050 

Rather frustrated with myself this morning.  After having "nothing to do" yesterday, of course I thought of a million things I should have done and, thus, really wanted to get them done TODAY -- the only problem being that I had to work today. 

I managed to get most done, in spite of it being a workday.  Right now, I am waiting for my baked eggplant to finish in the oven.  Then I will go downstairs to ride the bike to decompress.

It was *wonderful* going to bed early last night. I  would have gone to *sleep* earlier but stayed up 20 minutes extra trying to get my dumb FitBit to sync with my phone in order to update my stats.  I still got over 8 hours of sleep -- despite the fact that someone had a loud late night snack and then the smoke detector batteries downstairs decided now would be a good time to expire.  

I think I did well food-wise as well.  Had lunch late, so I didn't have to deal with that 1p-2:30p uncertain time, because I was finishing up lunch at around 2:15p.  One thing that I'm going to try next time is swishing my mouth out with minty mouthwash.  I did that one day, and I had no problems.  Killed my craving for munchies for about an hour, maybe even a little longer.  I was also proud of myself today for limiting the amount of ranch salad dressing I used for my raw vegetable snack.  Sometimes I use too much of that.  I'd like to stop doing that.

Hoping for an early bedtime tonight as well!

I feel like things finally fell into place.....it's gotten so much easier in the last few days......scales today read the same as yesterday only today I was still wearing pajamas.......so it's better...but I'm really not considering that because as of today...I will try to weigh in daily and with pajamas is easier than the previous way.  I'm hoping to remember weighing in...after so many months of rarely doing that...but the scales are out and will stay out now so hopefully that will be all the reminder I need.

Sleeping well and getting enough hours at night that I'm not always wanting an afternoon nap....never even gave a nap a thought yesterday so I want to keep that up.

The old familiar lack of desire for breakfast is here again.........for me...that is always a really good sign.......my body likes where it is and since I'm not currently stressing about anything....i will stay around this weight easily.....I still plan to lose more because i can't wrap my head around this weight...so it will at least make it easier to lose since food can easily be delayed.....I would have liked it a little better if i had made it to 145 first...but that's ok.

I did end up having a tiny snack last night...but it was by choice...I could have easily resisted it.....but I stayed up a little later than planned and I didn't think it would hurt anything.

So....as of today.....while I'm not maintaining yet.......still want to get to 130.....but somewhere between that and 145 will be acceptable...I will weigh in every morning and eat accordingly........not at maintenance yet...but close enough to get started.  Waiting for hunger, listing what I eat, weighing in daily and resisting naps so that I sleep better at night are the goals.....no counting anything foodwise as long as i don't start gaining.

I never seem to remember to add exercise here.....I need to start putting that down here too because i can step up the times on that too if needed.

I also need to remember to take vitamins and record that.

Still sipping my second cup of black coffee

Vitamins

 leftover chicken

ciabatta roll with shaved beef, spray butter

Pasta with mixed veggies

mango yogurt

dried strawberry/blueberry bar

coffee/creamer

THIS WEEK:

MONDAY - Work 8-4; 5 hours; 58 minutes

TUESDAY - Work 8-4; Coach 4:30-8:00 

WEDNESDAY - Work 8-4 

THURSDAY - Work 8-4   

FRIDAY - Work 8-4; Coach 4:30-6:30  

SATURDAY - Trip to see family

SUNDAY - Trip to see family

Ended up missing work Thursday and when I showed up at work on Friday they just turned me around and sent me home; just beginning to feel better today, although I was up part of the night coughing, which is why I only got about six hours of sleep last night. Spent the weekend just lounging and resting. At least I can stop worrying that my immune system is kicking the can, since this was most certainly the FLU and not just a common cold!

I haven't worked out for a long time, over a week. Feels like a lot longer. It's going to take a couple more workout-free days until i'm feeling ready to tackle it again.

The Hello Fresh meals have been really good; I only have one left to make. BF came and stayed with me for the weekend, so we made two meals while he was here and I had help. So far i've tried shrimp scampi, thyme chicken, and mustard pork chops. They were all very good and I would make them again, with a few changes. The one that's left i'm hoping to make today so that I can freeze some of it, it's chicken parmesan so I think I might have saved the best for last :)

Tummy was uneasy all yesterday, so didn't eat a lot.  Also didn't drink as much as usual.  Couldn't decide if I was going to be sick or not.  Took a couple tylenol at bedtime and woke up today feeling marginally better.  Tummy appears to feel a bit better, but have a small headache.

So yesterday with an uneasy tummy.......  I didn't want to eat because I wasn't feeling well.  But I did want to eat because I like food.  But I didn't want to eat because I felt "full" or I guess bloated.  But I did want to eat because I felt weak.  So even when eating something probably isn't the best course of action, I still want to.....

Still haven't figured out a concrete plan of attack for the near future.  Right now I'm back on my <1500 daily calorie limit.  Figured I needed to just get back into control the past week and returning to something I was familiar with was the easiest way.  Leaning towards a <2000 daily limit as soon as I get into the 160's, with higher allowance on our weekly date night.

My goal number for the scale has changed several times over the past couple years.  When I weighed 283, I thought the magic number was 199.  Remembered being in the high 190's and thought it would be a good comfortable number.  Got there and was happy with the accomplishment, but realized that it was a little chunkier than I would prefer.  So thought dropping down to 189 would be the end number.  Did that and it put me in a place kind of in-between normal everyday shirt sizes, so I wasn't exactly happy there.  Didn't know if it was possible, but figured 179 would drop me into the size shirts I wanted and get rid of some of the still present chunk.  Spent several months in the 170's last Spring and it was a good weight for running around, but really didn't want to take my shirt off to go swimming due to some belly fat.  Finally dropped to 169 at the start of this month and looked down to see that my tummy pooch was still there.  So trying to figure out what magic number I will be happy with.  

Each time I dropped another 10 lbs, I thought that was going to be the end of my downward journey.  So when I saw my tummy was still there each time, I had mixed emotions each time.  Happy to meet another goal, but unhappy to realize that the goal number didn't bring me to a place that I totally liked what I saw in the mirror.

Since 169 didn't seem to drop my bodyfat % as much as I'd like, maybe 159 is the magic number?  I don't know.  I also don't know how committed I am to dropping more weight right now.  Just concentrating on getting back into the high 160's for right now.  Maybe get into the high 160's, have a major cheat day at the Super Bowl party, gain 5-7 lbs on the scale, and wake up the next day to start a new push to lower body fat % during the month of February?

Midnight lil appetite  Banana 120

breakfast 9am egg and wrap 130 1/4 avocado 70, some salami 50, coffee 50

snack tbd maybe some nice nuts and blueberries 200

11-12 orange 100, wrap 50 ham 150, avocado 50

2pm protein bar very good ! 200 wow !

4pm nuts and a drink 300

1500 nice and healthy :-) 

2250 total - good mix!

-------------------

From later today thru Wednesday there's too many people in the house ! Just gotta deal with 3 annoying days then home free ;) 

i am being a decent guest. Cooked 18 eggs for the week hard boiled for sandwiches, bought good things like lots of avocados and water and some deli meats....toilet paper 

I am doing some sandwich prep for rosie and hubby when they go to work for breakfast 

 and today there's literally no towels left so I'm doing all laundry OR can't shower!!!!Mine and theirs....

But time is ticking so I will soon shower once I have a dry towel! Then I'm off to take a walk with the dog and since it's hot I'll wear shorts and a bathing suit top to get a tan !

Not feeling very motivated to do anything today.  Since yesterday, I've been out to shovel 3 times, 2x yesterday and then 1 more time this morning to get rid of what fell overnight.  News says just barely under 2 inches, but from I had to shovel each time, I'm sure we got closer to 3 inches.

I'm feeling those Sunday symptoms again where it's hard to enjoy the day in anticipation of Monday.  However, yesterday, I did some research online and found a whole bunch of YouTube videos for things like Chair Yoga, Sit and Be Fit, etc., that I could do at work.  I hate that I have the front desk, and not a more private office area like EVERYONE ELSE in the office has.  Most folks coming in think I'm the receiptionist, when really, I handle a high load of files.  So I could not do Sit and Be Fit if anyone comes in, or if my boss is around.  However, I am glad that I found these tools to use, perhaps occasionally if nothing else -- that is, if I can *remember* to use these and not fall into the trap of trying to work harder to get ahead and then totally stress out.

EVENING EDIT:  So I did a couple of things to help my anxiety.  I had a high fat/protein snack and I took a nap.  Both of those things helped.  I'm rather proud of myself for the nap.  You see, the new kitty is still rather skittish around me.  (She adores the kids and my husband.)  But she cuddled up next to me and had a nap of her own.  My Fitbit signaled to me that it was time to get up and get in some steps for the hour - 250 steps an hour, for 12 hours, are the parameters I have set up for minimal activity - but I opted to let the hour pass, so that I could continue to sit with Miss Kitty instead.

I am pretty much ready for bed at 6:45p.  I plan to read and go to sleep early.  Maybe I'm coming down with something... 

Had a good nights sleep....didn't eat last nights apple so had that with coffee this morning......probably will make something a little later for a real breakfast....but good for now. 

Got on the scales and was quite surprised at the number 149.6..........It's been quite awhile and with getting rid of some extra water over the last couple of days....it did surprise me.  Clothes no longer snug...and  need to dig out some smaller clothes again......good project for next week when things slow down a little. 

Technically, 149.6 is just over the 145 pounds from my acceptable weight for my height......still working on going lower....but right now...not counting anything...I am noticing that I am just eating less in general.....and that is what i want....for it to happen naturally instead of having to count........will see how that goes......counting is always an option if needed.......right now...I don't appear to need it......I do think I will be more careful with salt......because holding water like that is not what I want to keep doing.....it happens so fast....so i need to work on that......right now...sugar is under control and feeling great.

coffee with a coconut almond creamer

apple that I didn't eat last night

red peppers and

chicken

corn

 small garlic biscuits

peanut butter

small amt chocolate

1 mini pkg gummies

coffee with coconut creamer water

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16

........................................................

Good morning to you.

  Rainy, cold morning here. 

 Scale weighed me at 154 again this morning.  Calories were about 1550 yesterday.  

Bit of a roller-coaster to start out the new year.  Kind of the reverse of most years.  Typically I've been out of control during the holidays and buckle-down at the start of the new year.  This time I was fully on-plan during the holidays, made it to goal, and went mildly nuts as soon as I made it to goal.  

Had a few off-plan days, with Wednesday being the biggest departure.  Woke up Thursday morning and the scale said 183.  Decided to try to not freak out about it.  Took a few days to just kind of relax, while logging food again.  And just kind of got back into the lower calorie eating pattern again Thur, Fri, Sat.  Feeling mostly in control again and the scale number dropped quite a bit, back to a number I'm comfortable seeing.

Changing things up with the family's meals / menu.  The wife has been having migraines for quite awhile and has decided she wants to weed out the majority of sugars / carbs to see if that helps any.  Personally I think she has too much screen time (tv, ipad, phone), but maybe the diet also has something to do with it.  I've been on a much lower-carb diet for the past while (not overly strict).  Since carbs tend to lead to most of my off-plan days, I'm happy to get rid of the majority of the junk carbs from the house.  They've been eating down the supply of cereal, pasta, etc this past week and this coming week will be quite a bit lower in processed sugars / carbs for them.  With the lower carb push, I've decided to stop buying my popcorn, oatmeal, and grapefruit for now.  I still have a few packets of oatmeal left and enough popcorn to last another few days.  After that, I'm sure I'll initially regret the lower-carb approach for a bit while withdrawing from those daily staples.

Don't know how long the lower-carb approach will continue for the wife and girls, although I'd guess it'll be a quick week or two experiment.  Also not sure about my immediate and/or extended plans personally.  Just trying to relax somewhat and not be so fixated on weight / food.  Although that's a bit tough while continuing to log all of my food eaten.

Kombucha and extra kombucha 100

blueberries 100 

Noon Wrap 60 1/2 small avocado 150, little spinach, tasty ham 100!, mustard !!! 300 and fresh apple 100. 400 and so good! 

Sample meat and rice 200 at supermarket and coconut water 100, Atkins tasty cookie dough bar soon after from supermarket 200

5pm granola bar and coffee 200 Abdul candy 50 More candy 120 and banana 139 250

great workout going on :-)

Protein bar  after workout 250

1850 - great start to the week !

 Plan for today is laundry, walk, food shopping , maybe another deli meat, pool and gym...I think her hubby is happy to relax alone also for some of the day !!! Gotta do gym :-)

I'm not alone buy staying with her hubby today - he stayed behind from the wedding - which in all honesty is better actually Bc he will take care of dog and he offered a I take dog on a nice, long walk! We will also go buy more eggs so I can continue to make egg and salami or egg and avocado wraps for them and myself !! Very nice and satisfying !! The protein cookies I found are good and I want to take photos and see what brand they were !  I'll walk again to 7-11 to check...I think they are there!

Just a quick check-in this morning, because I want to do my shopping early on before it gets busy - and frankly, before it starts to snow.  On my there or back, I plan to stop off at the library.

Weigh-in today was perplexing.  My regular 0.5 scale weighed me in at the same number as last week.  I consider this a victory, even if the numbers didn't go down.  Feeling good, good energy levels, bloating & hormones kept in check.

My fancy Ironman scale (which weighs on the 0.2 - and which usually weighs me 1.6 heavier) weighed me in at 127.6.  So the fancy scale dropped but the regular scale has me maintaining.  That's an even bigger victory (in my mind) because if things follow as they have in the past, my 0.5 scale should have me dropping next week too.

What was even nicer was to see that the muscle number went up a  little bit.  So did bone density.  As a woman in early middle-age (OK, middle middle-age - almost 50), this is what I want to be seeing now.

EVENING EDIT:  One thing that shifting towards a keto plan is that it has me cooking and baking more -- especially on the weekends.  I think my husband was happy that I made dinner, and he got a break today, and that actually kind of made me feel good.

Made meatloaf, low-carb biscuits, bosco breadsticks (for anyone not watching their carbs and if the biscuits don't turn out), green beans, and green salad.

In preparing this meal, I kind of have the feeling like we're celebrating -- OK, I'm celebrating everyone being home for dinner.  My daughter, when she was in high school, told me that most of her friends do not eat dinner with their families.  Either parent or parents aren't home, or they'd rather eat up in their rooms alone - probably watching TV or something on the computer.  Kind of sad...

But what has me startled is that this relates to the discussion of using food as a reward.  Not necessarily a reward, but in a celebration.  Thanksgiving?  We're cooking!  Birthday?  Big cake!  Anniversary?  Fancy dinner!  Heck, when the kids would accomplish something at school or got hired at a job or something special, what would we do?  Go out to eat!

So I can completely understand the temptation to celebrate weight-loss with food.  After all, there is much to celebrate, right?  I get it.

This ties in, somehow, with my journey into maintenance.  I'm still using food to celebrate holidays, traditions, accomplishments.  Life is to be celebrated!   

(Not sure where I'm going with this and my keto biscuits are done, so I must leave the contemplation for later, LOL.)