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12.75 April Sunshine Hours;
24.50 January "Sunshine Hours"; 20.25 February Hours in the Sun/Outside/Cardio/Commute/Moving! 28.75 March Sunshine Hours :-D
May 16th: (if not paid previously without a request by me), request pay for both 1 unused vacation day as well as 1.5 sick days that i didn't take and was accrued by me for last cycle.
Lookahead!: 4/13/21 Tuesday:
Eats:
banana 150, smoked salmon 50, cream cheese 100, whole wheat wrap 100, coffee 50: 450..
Snacks:
Lunch, healthy:
Snacks:
Dinner:
Exercise:
At Work Reminders:
Wed, 4/14/21:
TIMESHEET
Review my priority list.
Wed / Thursday / Friday - half hour every single morning; just do it - Spend time saving the covid emails...no more organization other than placing in the correct job site folders. no more opening of emails, just move them into folders.
Thursday:
Upper body only workout :)
Friday:
Weekend Sat 4/17/21 & Sun 4/18/21:
ivermectin shots maybe today for other two guinea pigs for mites so I can in the future house all guinea pigs together (other affected guinea pig's skin has healed and hair begun to grow back now) ??
Monday, 4/19/21:
Work Reminders:
Friday, 5/7/21:second dose covid-19 vaccine after work.
Saturday, 5/8/21:NYC Walking Tour of "High Bridge". Will take subway in. It was $30 but it's bringing me a learning experience of a place i'm not familiar with and 1.5 hours of exercise. Bring it on!....taking a chance on this, the day after my shot the evening before. I don't want to miss this tour & can relax Sunday as MOM knows i'm getting a shot on Friday night as well.
Sunday, 5/9/21 Mother's Day - parents know i'm getting the shot Friday night before this; so; may go see them the following weekend...that's the good thing about family, we can probably celebrate Mother's day the following weekend.
Sunday, 5/30/21:1-4pm Queens Farm Volunteering on the County Farm!
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost and already at goal!12.00 April Sunshine Hours; (hour of sunshine added for driving out to Target and walking around, shopping there!)
24.50 January "Sunshine Hours"; 20.25 February Hours in the Sun/Outside/Cardio/Commute/Moving! 28.75 March Sunshine Hours :-D
May 16th: (if not paid previously without a request by me), request pay for both 1 unused vacation day as well as 1.5 sick days that i didn't take and was accrued by me for last cycle.
Lookahead!: Monday April 12: Vacation Day #1 :-D mostly a chily, rainy day spent mostly home doing my homework which makes me Happy :D
SO THANKFUL NOT TO BE AT WORK TODAY, AROUND THE EVIL PAYROLL LADY and just to in a negative environment. So glad for yesterday & today's downtime. Will go back to work much more relaxed tomorrow...and with a vision to just do my job and trying much harder not to take things personally. And to say as LITTLE as possible to the owners as they don't accept my thoughts as another adult and see me more as a child, although i'm turning 39 this year. If i have to, I will remind the owner that i'm not in my 20's and that i'm almost 40. I will use this if i HAVE to. because he's unfortunately not aware of it. I hope not to have to use that statement, but I will if he continues to say anything about me being "new..." or anything related. because "new" is now being associated with "young," as i can tell. so, if i have to bring my age into the mix, i will. Most employed are more late 40's-60's and that's the reason for so many difficulties and confusions moreso at work. There are a small amount younger than me, but i obviously don't fall into the 50+ crowd...so there's that - where i'm grouped with the younger crowd and any misconceptions that age group gets in the workplace.
Tuesday, i'm heading in with an open mind, yes, but i'm also not going to walked all over. I'm being paid LOW. and being treated Lowly, so, at this point, I have nothing more to lose besides my job. I'll just tread carefully, but will not be fully walked all over. I just can't, not now, not at 38. I'm not a kid and i'm not going to stand to be treated constantly like one. So, i'll hold back, hold my thoughts inside, answers brief to owners, and just try my best to hold myself together come Tuesday. If the owners ask me to do things that aren't ready and I can foresee or I knew it wouldn't be possible, i'll just say it in as short a sentence as i can and not involve my feelings, just the facts.
small load of guinea pig fleece hides that i hang in the corners of the cage and act as their hideaways / homes. I hadn't washed them since i bought them and realized they were dirty - so took the advantage of being home to put them in the wash....DONE!
home dying of my hair - roots only...Love how easy clairol is to use. plus, on amazon, it is just about $4 to buy whenever i do my roots. DONE!
more relaxing all morning...just resting, cleaning, eating well, guinea pig snuggles!...for now, DONE!
12;30pm start: Week 5 Bankruptcy Due Monday, 4/12/21, bankruptcy chapters 7,9,11,12,13: DONE!
Target, picked up some great goodies along with some kombucha, yogurts, veggies, fruit.
Week 6 (FINAL week):
Eats:
8am breakfast lg banana 150, coffee 50, some honey negl., 2 pancakes (2 servings) made from a Birch Benders just add water buttermilk mix (someone gave me an unopened bag, but i may not finish it, there's not much flavor). 250. 450.
10:30 pb 100 spread on the remainder of a pancake above
Noon Lunch: leftover sushi grade tuna with salad and seaweed salad, some dressing, 350, plaintain chips 200, coffee 50. 600.
1pm small amount of wine shortly after lunch while starting work 100. lol, the leftover strawberries were modly, so wine was my second choice!
2pm 2 small clementines 50, lots of stevia sweetened seltzer today...cravings persisting all afternoon bc i'm doing work and food has always been a crutch...but i got a hand enough over it to help myself this time around :)
3:30 wafers, pineapple greek yogurt 250
dinner: more poke leftovers tuna and some greens 250, plantain chips 200, 6oz raspberries 150. 600
2150
4/13/21 Tuesday :
Drop off affidavit at union hall on way home from work
lower body strength in AM, if i get out of bed a little earlier :)
upper body after work :)
At Work Reminders -
Wed 4/14/21
TIMESHEET
Review my priority list.
Wed / Thursday / Friday - half hour every single morning; just do it - Spend time saving the covid emails...no more organization other than placing in the correct job site folders. no more opening of emails, just move them into folders.
Weekend Sat 4/17/21/ Sun 4/18/21:
ivermectin shots maybe today for other two guinea pigs for mites so I can in the future house all guinea pigs together (other affected guinea pig's skin has healed and hair begun to grow back now) ??
Friday, 5/7/21:second dose covid-19 vaccine after work.
Saturday, 5/8/21:NYC Walking Tour of "High Bridge". Will take subway in. It was $30 but it's bringing me a learning experience of a place i'm not familiar with and 1.5 hours of exercise. Bring it on!....taking a chance on this, the day after my shot the evening before. I don't want to miss this tour & can relax Sunday as MOM knows i'm getting a shot on Friday night as well.
Sunday, 5/9/21 Mother's Day - parents know i'm getting the shot Friday night before this; so; may go see them the following weekend...that's the good thing about family, we can probably celebrate Mother's day the following weekend.
Sunday, 5/30/21:1-4pm Queens Farm Volunteering on the County Farm!
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost and already at goal!
Enjoy your day!
Hey Everyone!
I hope everyone is having a great week so far.
I had my exercise at gym yesterday, I'm a bit sore today and I feel strangely tired (normally I would feel sore but energized!). I have to pull it together though and perform the minimum on all levels. Or the maximum. Depends on expectations, right. Sigh.
Maybe I was unclear with my previous post, not MY team or work team who called me fat, it was in a game, and in the overall chat, not in the team chat. Some just saw my picture and decided to call me fat. Unknown people, not my team members and it's a game, not work. Phew, who cares about them random people. It's "better" than all the other options. My team is awesome, hehe.
I need to drink more water and I feel that I'm overeating again on healthy food. I rediscovered PB, and with that I think I'm having a tad bit too much of it on a daily basis. My new favourite thing is hot oatmeal with 2-3 tbps greek yogurt and 1-2 teaspoons of PB and some artificial sweetener (vanilla flavour). This is very fulfilling but it's becoming a comfort food and a meal replacement (whenever I don't have proper lunch I have this) and it shouldn't be... I feel I'm getting out of balance and frustrated again. I don't understand, honestly. Will I ever reach the point of "ok, this is the daily dose of this and it should be enough"... but no.. because the more I tell myself to restrict, the more I obsess about the topic and the more I crave the restricted stuff. I really really need some natural balance here....
How to tell the difference between mindful eating and dieting (meganhallier.com)
Muscle Milk, banana, yogurt, coffee, 3 hard candies, V-8 juice, chicken, noodles alfredo, lots of water
937 calories
Progress as of today: 2 lbs lost so far, only 78.8 lbs to go!April 6 - REST
April 7 - WALK; burned unknown calories
April 8 - WALK; BIKE; burned 739 calories
April 9 - WALK; burned unknown calories
April 10 - BIKE; burned 2,108 calories
April 11 - REST
I didn't wear my heart rate monitor on my walks last week; they were quick, 20 minute walks while taking a break from work. But i'm counting them as exercise because they were, LOL, my co-worker walks so fast I can barely keep up to her!
Big bike ride on April 10th where I managed 65 kilometres on gravel roads. I cried a little bit on this one. No, really, I did. And then I got over myself and kept going. Until the last few kilometres, where I begged my BF to come back with a vehicle to pick me up! (He did, bless his soul). By that point, I was probably doing more walking than biking.
I slathered myself with all the lotion the rest of Saturday and all of Sunday, and i'm feeling pretty good today. Not like last time at all, thank goodness!
Today I am starting the 75 HARD challenge. You can google it if you want more information. I just purchased the software app for my phone and will do it that way. It's very straightforward - you do five things each day for 75 days. Not easy, busy definitely straightforward. 1 - Complete two 45 minute workouts, one has to be done outside. 2 - Drink a gallon of water. 3 - Pick a diet, any diet. 4 - No cheating, no alcohol. 5 - Read 10 pages of a book (preferably motivational).
This morning I did 45 minutes of yoga. I never get a feeling of accomplishment after doing yoga; I don't burn any real calories, but yet I feel like i'm working so hard! LOL, anyways, it did feel nice to wake up by stretching my body, and it was a beginner class that I found on You Tube and worked perfectly for me.
Second workout will likely be shovelling snow after work. It started snowing early Sunday morning and hasn't really stopped since.
A new work week - and we'll see how it goes with Queen Bee! I have to keep reminding myself that I'm coming home early today. And I have to be sure that I do leave work when I say I'm going to leave. I tend to try to get more things done, and before you know it, an hour has gone by.
Had a good workout at the gym yesterday. Did upper body weights. Someone was messing with the TV's though, so that we could all watch the Masters golf tournament -- which I was intentionally boycotting watching - and so I ended up watching some kind of documentary from the Brigham Young University TV channel about how God led the people featured on the show to reunite with long-lost family members. Nope. Not going there. No thank you.
Food continues to be a struggle. I know I do too much cardio. I would be better served doing a little less cardio --- I mean, I really do TOO MUCH of it -- so that I can eat less, and then more weight training. Or rather, weight training more often.
Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!lol sorry you didn't have anything you prefer on tv at the gym! i totally understand, when i used to go to one gym, before i forced myself to get into the habit of wearing headphones, i'd ask them to change the radio station! i was in my late 20's at this point. haha. even early 30's i did it...then i switched to headphones LOL.
i get you with the food. when i really overdo cardio, it becomes hard to control the ccalories as well, but also, eating / habits are a mental thing and it's hard to break habits. remember how far you came. you don't need to follow those habits of now going up in weight, you've lost 4lbs at least....
i will say tho, that part of my weight loss may be to changes in doseage of the anxiety meds. the higher the dose, the easier it becomes for me to control my weight, or, it could ALSO be that i've learned more about how to control my eating. but, i'd give the meds a little thanks either way.
11.00 April Sunshine Hours;
24.50 January "Sunshine Hours"; 20.25 February Hours in the Sun/Outside/Cardio/Commute/Moving! 28.75 March Sunshine Hours :-D
May 16th: (if not paid previously without a request by me), request pay for both 1 unused vacation day as well as 1.5 sick days that i didn't take and was accrued by me for last cycle.
Lookahead!:
Sunday, April 11th:
did lots of laundry and some cleaning. also went out to pick up something for dinner. might do a little work tonight, but saved it for tomorrow since i wasn't feeling energized today and spent most of the day just cleaning up and relaxing.
sunday eats:
kombucha 100, last 1/8 slice coconut custard pie 210, large banana 140.
450....
snack chocolate 100
lunch teriyaki tofu 150 not great, chips 300, dried fruit 100. 550
snacks blueberries 100, chocolate 100
Dinner: part of a poke bowl with tuna and some dressing 350, also some Chinese wanton chips 100?, side of pita chips as well 150, 600
8pm small amount choc and wine 150 total.
2050. goodnight all...no homework done today, just relaxing.
bed early
Monday April 12: Vacation Day #1
possible at home dying of my roots
Do Week 5 Bankruptcy Due Monday, 4/12/21, review of bankruptcy chapters:
& Do Week 6 (FINAL week) Due April 19, but hand it in early - be DONE with it!
4/13/21 Tuesday work:
Must spend time to adjust Inner log - transfer all overview notes for months Jan, Feb, March.
Must save on server all of February and well as March doc emails.
Do Shadow followups
Organize my Log for comparison with V's spreadsheets, she already makes spreadsheets, is already doing the job, but now i was told to repeat it so I can check and make sure i have the same numers as her. - Add in the mods that haven't been organized and do a running tally on the log at the bottom adding all reqs and mods.
Wed 4/14/21
TIMESHEET before i forget.
check my own priority list to see what i'm forgetting...?...
Wed or Thursday - just do it - Spend time saving the covid emails...no more organization other than placing in the correct job site folders. no more opening of emails, just move them into folders.
Weekend Sat 4/17/21/ Sun 4/18/21:
Do Housing Affidavit income statement worksheets this weekend, if i want to notarize, i will do it Monday at a bank by me. Notarization is optional this year, but, I like to get things done right.
Notarize Housing Income Affidavit at citibank or any bank that has a notary working
ivermectin shots maybe today for other two guinea pigs for mites so I can in the future house all guinea pigs together (other affected guinea pig's skin has healed and hair begun to grow back now)
Food shopping at Target using my gift card for this week or next weekend on my way home from parents if i visit them?, whatever i prefer...
Friday, 5/7/21:second dose coivd-19 vaccine after work
Saturday, 5/8/21:NYC Walking Tour of "High Bridge". Will take subway in. It was $30 but it's bringing me a learning experience of a place i'm not familiar with and 1.5 hours of exercise. Bring it on!....may have to cancel this as i now see it's mother's day...
Sunday, 5/9/21 Mother's Day
Sunday, 5/16/21:1-4pm Queens Farm Volunteering ...may also cancel this...too much in these two couple weeks, unfortunately..
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost and already at goal!
catch up with you again soon!
Same old same old. stationary bike, treadmill & weights
Changed my English muffin whipped cream cheese & fake brown sugar evening dessert to a sugar free jam topping on the cheese. the fake brown sugar is ok, but has too much of an aftertaste.
Working on 40 gms of fiber, mostly from Fiber One and the hi fiber English muffins. Been terribly constipated lately. The husband is right. I'm full of $hit. Not easy getting enough fiber. Very healthy, linked to reduced risk of colon cancer. Was good at doing 40 gms, but slacked off.
Progress as of today: 21.2 lbs lost so far, only 7.8 lbs to go!
I was eating Fiber One for my attenuation snacks, but then switched over to a protein snack instead, because protein holds my stress eating urges away better. Or at least that's what I thought.
Good luck!
also if you drink much more water, it may help your constipation...or you can try kombucha again ;) speaking of the stuff, i need some more. eh, i'll just pick up a couple after work tomorrow or something. not in the mood to do a big food shopping today!
i got the moderna 1st dose and just a sore shoulder for a few days, otherwise i'm OK! nervous for 2nd dose in a month, but feel i'll be OK!
Crystal light, coffee, potato soup, cheddar brat, lettuce, dressing, chicken, alfredo noodles = 1040
Progress as of today: 0 lbs lost so far, only 80.8 lbs to go!Welcome. it's always nice to see a new person here with us.
Welcome!
Yesterday kind of dissolved into a diet-disaster, although, mentally, it was a good day for me.
I was disappointed in the Zoom tour. It was not a tour of the museum, it was a powerpoint webinar about African Americans in aviation. So my expectations were not met -- which is OK. I learned another lesson about how to set my expectations. AND it was an interesting presentation, once I realized what it was going to be. I felt that the presenter was not fully prepared in her presentation, and that it was a more "free style" discussion of her chosen topic. Also, I just felt an overwhelming sadness, thinking about the Chauvin trial, Black Lives Matter --- IDK. Let's just say that this hour was not what I thought it was going to be. This bothered me for most of the remainder of the day. In fact, I'm still kind of bothered by this.
I'm looking forward to next week's tour of the Garfield Park Conservatory. I do much better with plants.
After the Zoom tour was done, Husband said that our Son would be calling soon. So that meant I would not be able to go to the gym. His family calls usually take at least an hour - and I'm so glad that he does call. It's so good to hear from him. I have to say this to you, friends -- my son is kind of stressing me out with his plans for his vacation leave this summer. He wants us to take a week to go back out to Montana. I don't know if I can do that. He's talking about August, and that's right before Mistakes Girl has her baby. And it's also our busiest time in the office. Finally all that I can think about is getting through this next week with Queen Bee -- I can't be thinking about August.
So the call kind of stressed me out.
I decided then, after the call, that I would go to the gym after dinner, which would have worked well, because we all wanted an early dinner. Fine, except that after dinner, I did not want to go to the gym. Nobody wanted to go with me. It was getting dark. My car was all cozy in the garage. And I had laundry to fold and a new episode of my British mystery TV show ("Death in Paradise").
I have decided now to start this week anew. No more of this indulgent eating, except for tomorrow, when we'll have cake to celebrate Daughter's birthday.
Also, the next time I feel the urgent, uncontrollable need to break the 11th Commandment at work, I must do these things:
Let's see if this can help.
To Do Today:
SO HAPPY I AM LEAVING WORK EARLY TOMORROW
Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!
Hope you can schedule the family vacation when it’s good for everyone.
Unfamiliar with that British series. Watching the crime documentary miniseries on the murder of Michael Jordan’s father. Didn’t know anything about it. Ok, but going way off topic & slowing down.
IDK - doing some real soul searching as to why this disappointment bothered me so much, other than taking up my time.
I wanted to mention, if you didn't look yet, at your bar graph weight chart. you are doing so well, lowest weight in months. you've almost lost 5 lbs. so, the work you are doing has actually gotten you success! so now is not the time to give up!
LOL. well, that IS unfortunate that the webinar was nothing you had planned it to be. I can TOTALLY understand your disappointment and it lasting as you had set aside your time for something you planned for and they semi-fell through. at least you learned something, but i totally understand! i'd def be feeling the same way.
Regarding the webinar - it just feels as though every hour of my time on the weekends is precious, and so this seemed like "wasted time". Thank you for understanding.
i'm glad you will enjoy cake tomorrow for your daughter's bday. remember there's no concrete bad/good and it's the serving size that really counts.
rooting for you!
11.00 April Sunshine Hours;
24.50 January "Sunshine Hours"; 20.25 February Hours in the Sun/Outside/Cardio/Commute/Moving! 28.75 March Sunshine Hours :-D
Mid-April:, request pay for both 1 unused vacation day as well as 1.5 sick days...that should amount to a good amount of money, approx half a weeks pay. so, i'm looking forward to requesting it, soon, approx May 1.
LOOKAHEAD:
Saturday, April 10th: VOLUNTEERING!!!
NYC Parks Stewardship Volunteer - 9am-12pm Goodhue Park, Staten Island...I'm excited to drive back to this area as Staten Island is a borough of NYC that people who do not live there do not ever drive to unless it's to do something speciifcally on Staten Island bc Staten Island is out of the way from everywhere.
Possible Sri Lanken veggies / meat? on the way home :) found a restaurant while researching the area.
Breakfast lg banana 150, coffee 40, slice custard pie 210. 400.
snacks thru volunteering and early afternoon fee chocolates and hard candies 200
3pm lunch back at home :) bigger size mcdonalds fries 400, nuggets 200, some sri lankan veggies in curry 200. 800. black coffee cold sweet.
5:30 blueberries 100; greek yogurt 150
one of my fave snacks late at night, i buy them every so often - chocolate coated greens bar, almost 300 cal.
1950 total and great exercise.
Sunday, April 11th:
Do Week 5 Bankruptcy Due Monday, 4/12/21, review of bankruptcy chapters:
& Do Week 6 (FINAL week) Due April 19, but hand it in early - be DONE with it!
Monday April 12: Vacation Day #1
Do Housing Affidavit income statement worksheets this weekend, if i want to notarize, i will do it Monday at a bank by me. Notarization is optional this year, but, I like to get things done right.
Notarize Housing Income Affidavit at citibank or any bank that has a notary working
Food shopping at Target using my gift card for this week or next weekend on my way home from parents if i visit them?, whatever i prefer...
back to shoe repairer to reglue the other shoe now ugh!
possible at home dying of my roots
4/13/21 Tuesday work:
Must spend time to adjust Inner log - transfer all overview notes for months Jan, Feb, March.
Must save on server all of February and well as March doc emails.
Do Shadow followups
check my own priority list to see what i'm forgetting...?...
???.set up worksheets for Comparison with the person, V, who is already doing the job but now i was told to repeat her job so I can check i have the same numers as her. (added on work, to my load, that i really am not looking forward to doing, but should be easy..)....not sure about this assignment...i'm not sure if i need to do it....waiting as LONG AS POSSIBLE as i can see this assingment really not happening....and i will do something on my own that will work just as well but faster..starting maybe Friday or Tuesday.
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost and already at goal!Perhaps once your BK class is over, your overall stress levels will come down. Well, that's my hope for you anyways :-)
I do think once the course is over things will feel a little differently :-) thank you for your comments
Sunday. I should do so many things but I feel so sluggish (it's the period having this effect on me) and unmotivated to move...
I took the puppy for a walk early, he keeps waking us up around 5-6 AM every morning. It's not his fault, it's all about circumstances. He should have an extra walk at night but I am not able. I can take him out over the day 3-4 times, but I go to bed around 9-10 PM and that's it. I am not up to another walk with him after 10 PM, and he would need that in order to delay those morning walks with an hour or two. Oh well. I can't possibly batter myself with this on top of everything else (but I do anyway, right..). Again, feeling like a failure from dusk till dawn.
Here's the puppy, and some more text below the images, if you wanted to keep on reading.
I'm coming to the conclusion again that I should reorg my priorities. I spend too much time on a certain game. I should reduce game time to 20-30 minutes a day or quit the whole thing. I'm more inclined to do the latest. I don't feel the drive anymore and it's more of a burden than anything else, honestly. The team is really good and that's the only thing keeping me logging in daily.
Also, in the same game I was called fat many times recently. I changed my profile pic to one I took with SnapChat, a filter that turned me into Easter bunny. The ears and stuff. I guess it is a small image and my face indeed looks round as a proper bunny. Oh don't get me wrong, I'm also fat. But why do they have to call me fat? I haven't done anything against them, I wasn't even talking to them and two guys in one week called me fat just like that, in the common live chat area. A part of me wants to call them out on triggering me and making me feel uncomfortable. Another part of me, the stronger one, let it go. I just went silent. But it certainly doesn't help and I'm here talking about it so it obviously bothers me more than it should and more than I admit.
Will I heal for good. Will this ever get better. Will I ever be happy with my body and myself. I hope so.
A pic of this morning, castle in the fog:
I'm sorry that someone on your team called you fat. WTH? IDK... you could have come back with a snappy comeback ("At least I'm not impotent"), but frankly, maybe it's a wake-up call to re-evaluate who you wish to spend your time with.
being called fat by team members is rude. I would leave that team, join a different one. i don't know. whoever called you that is extremely rude.
7.00 April Sunshine Hours;
24.50 January "Sunshine Hours"; 20.25 February Hours in the Sun/Outside/Cardio/Commute/Moving! 28.75 March Sunshine Hours :-D
Mid-April:, request pay for both 1 unused vacation day as well as 1.5 sick days...that should amount to a good amount of money, approx half a weeks pay. so, i'm looking forward to requesting it, soon, approx May 1.
LOOKAHEAD:
4/9/21, Friday Work: another very stressful horrible day.
make adjustments to log master list - in progress waiting on two people for more information- add more on Monday - one last entry
Done - MUST do by noon: 38/39/131 docs...and anything else i can finish between today and tomorrow...has now been put off along with all MWDBE...fnish first out of ALL the mwdbe projects....in progress at same time as above...done
Friday eats:
lg banana 150, coffee 50, custard pie 200. 400
snacks: keurig hot choc 50, peanut butter spoonful (keep at work) 100, 2 apple mentos, included.
lunch very healthy: some rice and bean sautee with kale mix 350, tomatoes 50. 400. some black sweet coffee.
sucking candies 50
1100
snacks (late afternoon, maybe extra drink/snack to get me home?
dinner: i have some tasty leftovers so i don't need takeout tonight - roasted oiled cabbage 200, 2 slices munster cheese 120, on a roll 200, one black garlic, dried fruit/candy mix 230..750
1850.
leave work at 3:40 - After Work: 1st dose covid vaccine - for 4:30pm appointment across town, takes at least a half hour from work to get to vaccine sight at a high school upper west side of Manhattan and i was texted to be at appt 15 min earlier than i scheduled it for.
Saturday, April 10th: VOLUNTEERING!!!
NYC Parks Stewardship Volunteer - 9am-12pm Goodhue Park, Staten Island...I'm excited to drive back to this area as Staten Island is a borough of NYC that people who do not live there do not ever drive to unless it's to do something speciifcally on Staten Island bc Staten Island is out of the way from everywhere.
Sunday, April 11th:
Do Week 5 Bankruptcy Due Monday, 4/12/21, review of bankruptcy chapters:
& Do Week 6 (FINAL week) Due April 19, but hand it in early - be DONE with it!
Monday April 12: Vacation Day #1
Do Housing Affidavit income statement worksheets this weekend, if i want to notarize, i will do it Monday at a bank by me. Notarization is optional this year, but, I like to get things done right.
Notarize Housing Income Affidavit at citibank or any bank that has a notary working
Food shopping at Target using my gift card for this week or next weekend on my way home from parents if i visit them?, whatever i prefer...
back to shoe repairer to reglue the other shoe now ugh!
possible at home dying of my roots
Tuesday work: Must spend time to adjust Inner log - transfer all overview notes for months Jan, Feb, March.
Must save on server all of February and well as March doc emails.
Do Shadow followups
check my own priority list to see what i'm forgetting...?...
???.set up worksheets for Comparison with the person, V, who is already doing the job but now i was told to repeat her job so I can check i have the same numers as her. (added on work, to my load, that i really am not looking forward to doing, but should be easy..)....not sure about this assignment...i'm not sure if i need to do it....waiting as LONG AS POSSIBLE as i can see this assingment really not happening....and i will do something on my own that will work just as well but faster..starting maybe Friday or Tuesday.
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost and already at goal!Did you get weights in last night? I thought of you as I tried, pathetically, to do leg weights.
I appreciate your comments to me yesterday :-)
i got my weights in...started late but did them fast and i'm so glad i got it done. it's ok if you struggled with your legs. it gets better with repitition.
i'm glad you found my comments to be helpful in some way <3
let's enjoy our weekend!!! :) celebrate!
Interesting how the Amazon workers in Alabama voted not to unionize. A big factor was union dues, but the article didn’t say how much. I wonder.
gotta pay dues if you want a union to back you. otherwise, with no funds, how does a union operate. they don't get it.
So I get it, as far as teaching unions go. And I’m sure they are not unique.
Forgive me, DD-ers, for I have sinned. Yesterday, I broke the 11th Commandment ("Thou shall not eat the Boss' food at work"). I caved and had a very heavy chocolate chip scone. I just couldn't cope with the work stress AND food stress yesterday. I did pretty good the rest of the week, but yesterday, I just broke down.
Not a commandment, but then I also indulged in some cookie desserts after dinner last night. I completely knew that I was eating because I was tired/exhausted - both physically and mentally - but that didn't stop me from having a few extra cookies.
I was ready for a very high weigh-in today, but much to my surprise, the scale had not moved. OK, I'll take that. Is that a sign that I've been forgiven? Well, one thing for sure, I had a very good morning bike ride on my recumbent bike this morning. Lots of energy!
It's cool, cloudy, and rainy today and I LOVE IT. This is why I know, in my heart, that I could never be completely happy if I moved to Vegas to be closer (physically) to my mother. I need the cooler weather, the wet weather. I don't think I could be happy in a desert. Anyway...
So while the weather means that the gym will be busier, because all those "outdoor" people will come inside to workout, that's OK. In fact, I'm thinking about going tonight, when it's emptier, even if this pushes me out of my routine and comfort zone. I'll see if Daughter and/or Husband wants to go with me. But they don't have to - I'll be happy just going alone too.
I have a virtual, Zoom tour of the DuSable museum this afternoon 1pm-2pm. I'm really looking forward to that. Afterwards, if I want to go to the gym then, that's OK, I'll do that. However, I have a bit of deep cleaning to do today (and tomorrow?) in order to prepare for guests on Monday night, that will come over to celebrate my Daughter's birthday. And I'm OK with doing the cleaning - the physical work is welcomed until I get tired, and then I can take a break.
Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!
I work at the office, so I don't have stress-decompressing tools available to me other than walking away from my computer, which then means I'll be farther behind in work.
I'll write more about all of this today - thank you for inspiring my diary entry for today! :-)
i totally relate to the feeling of eating bc i am tired / exhausted. as of recently, when i really feel totally wiped, i will consider eating, but then skipping exercise so that i can just go to bed after eating, and not need to eat more during/after my workout. i'm just writing this saying i can relate. you've known me long enough to know i've dealt with some crazy overeating due to stress. I think the anxiety medicine i'm on has helped...actually, i should just say i KNOW that its helped. how couldn't it!?
you have such nice things in store....the online tour sounds great and so does going to the gym either just yourself or with family.
Hey Everyone!
Alert: negative stuff follows. Writing it out.
I've been absent, I know.. lot of work, and lacking motivation of everything. Honestly, I'm focusing on mental survival nowadays. It's getting better now that my son is back to pre-school and gym finally reopened this week. I had 4 sessions already, and my body & mind start to feel the improvement.
I really crave for balance in all aspects of life, and it's been so challenging. Maintaining work, sanity, family home, peace & integrity, while having ADHD and constantly feeling like a complete failure because I don't have my sh..t pulled together... It's just annoying and depressing most of the time.
I joined some Facebook groups about Mindfulness and Minimalist Life, it actually helps to read and practice small yet powerful actions and reflect upon short texts like these:
I really like the shower meditation idea -- I shower at night, as it helps me sleep, and I have an urgent need to "wash away" the grime of the day (literally and figuratively). I'm going to try this visualization - to be very intentional about it - that you posted.
Very short on time this morning. The Boss left at 4:20pm yesterday and minutes later, 2 of my files closing today blew up. The one I rescued, the other it will depend on whether or not the buyer wants to close today. She's so picky and yet very ignorant, so we'll see. Once again, I needed an attorney, New Guy was the only one around, and this was way over his head. "I'll have to ask the Boss." Well, DUH!!! I need help NOW. **I** can ask the Boss tomorrow. Of course I didn't say that. I'm just frustrated with his inexperience and lack of knowledge that comes from that inexperience. I'm also noticing a lack of self-confidence in him.
The thing is, we're promoting his services when he doesn't know what to do when it gets complicated. Does he know what he's doing?
My lower body leg workout last night was pathetic. Just did 2 exercises, 4 sets of 15 reps. Could say that I didn't have it in me, but this was a motivational issue 100% and not a physical limitation. Not exhaustion, just laziness.
I did find myself doing some deep breathing and arm stretching yesterday. Not exactly a timeout though. It was a little better, but the thing is to STEP AWAY from the desk, the computer, and the phone. I think I will keep working on this.
Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!
Initially, the idea was that Associate Attorney would be the future and "buy out" the firm from the Boss, when the Boss was ready to retire. However, over the past 5-6 years, Associate Attorney has clearly demonstrated his LACK of ability to lead. He's a follower, not a leader - and that's fine, but not someone that you want to sell the firm to.
I'm not sure I can picture myself working for only him though. That's a completely different question.
6.00 April Sunshine Hours;
24.50 January "Sunshine Hours"; 20.25 February Hours in the Sun/Outside/Cardio/Commute/Moving! 28.75 March Sunshine Hours :-D
Mid-April:, request pay for both 1 unused vacation day as well as 1.5 sick days...that should amount to a good amount of money, approx half a weeks pay. so, i'm looking forward to requesting it, soon, approx May 1.
LOOKAHEAD:
Thursday 4/8/21 work: I'm getting thru the week one moment to the next. It's a week I will not miss once it's over. It's not worth writing more about, except that I know in my heart that I am not wrong this time and that although I won't be listened to or acknolwedged for it, i can know in my heart that what happened here at work wasn't my doing. I know in my heart that a the payroll woman who refused to work with me continued her harassment and complaints of me even after i wasn't working with her.
I can know in my heart that although i can't amend the situation because management has told me they are not on my side (in other words, same meaning), I can know in my heart that these things happen, life isn't fair, and love myself more for being myself. It's been a very tough week and I am sure the bullying and badgering will continue, although I will not say a thing.
I won't complain no matter what she does to the owner and only to my boss if it's worth it. Like most office status quo, what has always "been right" is "right." I'm not looking for advice. I've been thru similar things before. There's age discrimination in play. The woman who's bullying is payroll and knows my age, salary, where i live. nothing's good enough for her. she wants me out. Hey, if it happens, it happens. I've been told by the owner, "you are the low one on the totum pole." and let me tell you, if those words aren't hurtful coming from an owner, when you go to them for help because you are concerned, i don't know what is. I didn't go to him, until she didn't stop, only after it kept coming to me, from the owner and my boss.
it's over now. but just to know it's not ok here to stand up when someone is hurting me - because they've been here a long time - and that i'm automatically wrong because i'm new (and younger), is not right. it's not right because the woman is a bully and trying to hurt me, on purpose, instigating all situations. And when i stand up because i want to say i need help, i'm told not to come to back tothe owner, to take care of it with my boss...even when the payroll lady goes straight to the owner. i'll always remember this, like i remember other extraordinary workplace scenarios in my mind, for life.
Everyone struggles with something. I've been dealt work struggles throughout my life. I'm not saying i'm never wrong and never could have done better. But this one time, i wouldn't change a thing I did. Because even if i did things not as well in the past, in my heart i know i did it right this time. That is the only thing that matters to me at this point.
I am making 47k, dealing with office harassment and bullying, in a company that goes with status quo becaues that's what's easier for everyone. this is the true world. most people will not be out to help. This situation has been extremely stressful, hurtful and upsetting to me over the past 1.5 weeks or so. It's something that could have been stopped in it's tracks as soon as it started. That's life.
Work:
**LOGGING** to be done today: Jan/Feb/March unpaid DONE!
finish other smaller tasks in last hour of work, leave promptly at 4pm.
Tonight: speedy and quick upper bod strength workout & some leg massaging for preventative purposes.
Thursday Eats:
Large banana 150, coffee 40, coco custard pie so tasty 210 1/8 slice 400
9:45/10am snacks: chocs coated greens bar splurge 300..need fast energy today...little extra, 250.
lunch: few fries 100, mix of rice/sauteed greens/beans 250, ground turkey 150. 500, green sweet tomatoes so good. 50. 550.
snacks: tbd :-D half a pack of sour gummies 100
dinner: the insides of two heavily fried vegetable rolls, large size, 200. the outside of one of them...and i'm very nauteous now from the oil 400, egg 100, and 3 crappy gummy moons no name brand 120. 820, sick to my stomach.
2120.
4/9/21, Friday -
Work: Inner log - transfer all overview notes for months Jan, Feb, March.
save on server all of February and well as March doc emails.
38/39/131 docs...and anything else i can finish between today and tomorrow...has now been put off along with all MWDBE...fnish first out of ALL the mwdbe projects.
check my own priority list to see what i'm forgetting...?...
???.set up worksheets for Comparison with the person, V, who is already doing the job but now i was told to repeat her job so I can check i have the same numers as her. (added on work, to my load, that i really am not looking forward to doing, but should be easy..)....not sure about this assignment...i'm not sure if i need to do it....waiting as LONG AS POSSIBLE as i can see this assingment really not happening....and i will do something on my own that will work just as well but faster..starting maybe Friday or Tuesday.
After Work: 1st dose covid vaccine - leave work at 3:40...for 4:30pm appointment across town, takes at least a half hour from work to get to vaccine sight at a high school upper west side of Manhattan.
Saturday, April 10th: VOLUNTEERING!!!
NYC Parks Stewardship Volunteer - check if it's really 9am-12pm? Goodhue Park, Staten Island...try to moderate myself so that i have energy for this opportunity as I have no more days off around this one, LOL, but really!..I'm excited to drive back to this area (staten island is where the funeral was a couple weeks ago; tho i do not think it was by this park) and take out food from a new restaurant on my way back to Queens, i'm around an hour or more away, need to look up directions...so, when i do have time - and i DO for this task! - i'll find a restaurant with good eats to try for Saturday later in the day after volunteering <3 oh, i can't wait for Saturday <3
Do Housing Affidavit income statement worksheets this weekend, if i want to notarize, i will do it Monday at a bank by me. Notarization is optional this year, but, I like to get things done right.
Sunday, April 11th:
Do Week 5 Bankruptcy Due Monday, 4/12/21, review of bankruptcy chapters:
& Do Week 6 (FINAL week) Due April 19, but hand it in early - be DONE with it!
Monday April 12: Vacation Day #1
Notarize Housing Income Affidavit at citibank or any bank that has a notary working
Food shopping at Target using my gift card for this week or next weekend on my way home from parents if i visit them?, whatever i prefer...
back to shoe repairer to reglue the other shoe now ugh!
possible at home dying of my roots
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost and already at goal!
Let's focus on getting you through today and tomorrow. Chalk this week up a a rough week, and just get through it.
Having said that, when you are "low man" on the pole, keep your head down, get the work done, and try to keep quiet. They aren't going to change their ways, so don't waste any more energy on feeding this negative situation, with its negative people.
I know it's really hard and not a great way to spend your day. I think it's times like these where the line between work and life becomes so clear.
i write this in regards to your comment about work and life and the line is clear. That vacation day is a definite necessity for this work life balance. And i'm so glad i did take it, planned for it a week ago, and it's in the books to happen for me.
Sometimes I act like I’m too dumb to know someone’s insulting me, Shows I don’t care & can keep the peace. But it’s situational, of course.
Very busy trading stocks etc lately & watching George Floyd trial.
Weight creeping up, think all those rice cakes & crisps may be to blame, deleted them from the weekly Walmart list.
Still working out in the gym. Matt has a nice big TV there.
Progress as of today: 20.8 lbs lost so far, only 8.2 lbs to go!
Went to the office yesterday - I can say for a fact - my dogs are better coworkers!
I may be getting caught up from my week away - just seems there were so many more emails than usual to answer and respond too.
$359 phone bill - I don't think so...had to call for line service at one of my sites!
Working from home this a.m. and had my mid-term performance review virtually...weird! I'm doing a 'great job'...this is good for me, now I'll go walk my co-workers.
Took a longer than usual morning walk - I was on a conference call listening so I was kinda working.
Ran across a photo that I couldn't pass up.
IN A BED OF DAFFODILS...BE A TULIP! - {Continue to be true to yourself HOP}
Also at work - Mike the flower guy told me to take my Orchid home but I forgot it...I will get it next time.
He also put Easter Lily's on the window shelf and I caught this one bloom.
Woke up wide awake with DH at 3:15 - laid in bed for over 45 minutes and then over slept this a.m.
Crazy weird dreams but slept very well.
B: yogurt, granola, vanilla iced latte
L: chips, saula, cheese
D: TBD I was thinking of checking out a diner called The Foundry if DH is up to it.
I hope you all have a great evening! IP
Progress as of today: 47.7 lbs lost so far, only 80.2 lbs to go!
Took some daffodil pics for a Twitter buddy. Will post here. All over the property. No tulips.
How wonderful it is to have something like your love of baseball to look forward to almost nearly every evening. I mean, wouldn't that be wonderful to look forward to at the end of a really bad day? "Well, at least there's a game tonight, and I plan to chill out and just watch the game." Ahhh....
in general, dogs are easier to deal with than people! oh yea.
there's nothing better than getting a good review. i'm sure your dogs enjoyed their walk too.
thanks for the shout out! I appreciate your support. I hope my situation at work blows over by when i resume work on Tuesday since i'm off tomorrow...i'm not sure how it will be. i just know that i have a LOT of work to catch up on...
Oh. My. Word. Let me tell you, if yesterday was any indication of it's like to be short-staffed, next week is going to be VERY difficult. Mistakes Girl left at 11am, so that she and her husband could take care of something in downtown Chicago. This was unexpected, as she forgot to schedule her time off on the calendar, but I didn't think it'd be a big deal. But that phone would just not stop ringing yesterday, and Mistakes Girl is the first line of defense against phone calls (i.e. receptionist).
And I'm so frustrated with my Boss. He keeps trying to put work off that he needs to do - as an attorney - on to others. When I corrected him on this, he told me that I needed to give him a break. Well, you're the attorney!!! Do your job!!! Or don't take on these types of clients, if you can't or won't do the work!!!
Some of these aggravations are because of his personality, but recently, I've noticed a LOT of behaviors that I'm afraid are because of his age and/or his health. This worries me, saddens me, frustrates me.... So add all this extra stress to an already stressful workplace and there you go.
Thank you for letting me vent this all out here.
I mentioned to Maria, in her comment to me yesterday, that I need to start taking timeouts at work and just focus on breathing and calming down. I think this would help me greatly.
I think I need to start doing mini yoga sessions on a regular basis. There are lots of 15 minute yoga videos on YouTube. Something like that.
I just need to grasp at anything that will bring down my stress levels without costing me a million calories!!!
Yesterday, I realized I was out of high-fiber wraps, so I couldn't have my peanut butter wrap for breakfast. Had oatmeal instead, and believe it or not, it actually held me quite well. I'm wondering if I should go back to that (175 calories) rather than my wraps (260 calories). But then I realized that Husband bought me more wraps and these are smaller in size, so now the peanut butter wraps will be 235 calories. Hmm.... Something to think about changing up, I think.
I'm sorry, I'm kind of all over the place with today's entry, with my thoughts and such, and now I'm out of time so I have to end it here, now.... Except to say that tonight is lower body weight training and I'm REALLY looking forward to THAT!!!
Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!
Sounds like your job can be highly stressful. HUGS
your boss is EXACTLY like my boss. my boss as well puts off priorities and they become very late! ha! then again, i do not know exactly what type of work my boss does, as i do what could have been his work...believe it or not, i do not exactly know what work my boss does! i couldn't explain it in depth! i know he is involved in writing contracts, but, let me tell you - there's a LOT i do not know!