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Cybermom4 - Thursday Feb 26, 2009
(3 Simple Meals a Day)
Weight: 167.6

Wow what a crazy day - I feel like I need to learn yoga or some kind of stress release activity.  HA HA  - I know that the best activity would be .......exercise!  That won't happen until summer when school is off.  However, I have been pondering the fact that my daughter starts soccer next week and if I was really smart, I would leave one hour early to get her and stop at the park and walk my 3 miles.  I can (or could) cover 3 miles in 45 min and that would give me plenty of time to pick her up and get my exercise in.   I used to go to a trainer and he would say...just do it!   It's so easy for some people and it's very hard for others  - and I know becasue it;s so easy for me to committ to walking in the summer, but in the winter  -- forget it.  Well, I'll make my decision next week!

I am somewhat over my guilt ...My hubby was reassuring that ordering the meals from the lady (through a friend) was a good idea and that given our lifestyle now, it will be helpful to us.  That made me feel better.  He especially liked the idea of the meals over buying mcdonalds and pizza and I agree.  Well, he doesn't know it but I did ask the cook to look at a recipe for broccoli cheese soup :)   She said it looked yummy and she'd let me know if she makes it.  I got the recipe from a website and it is the supposedly the recipe  from panera bread.  So we'll see.

Eating right this week has been OK -- our main company was visiting our office today and ordered pizza for everyone and ...someone made 7 layer cookies --could I resist  -- nope - I ate my fill and loved every bite.

Well it's my daughter's 17th birthday today and she is really disappointed b/c she was called in to work.  She and a friend are having a birthday party on Saturday.  They have invited over 100 kids from their schools and youth group and instead of gifts they are asking for people to bring supplies to support the local mission.  My daughter started a little group called Project Love.  They do charity work and coordinate ways to help others in need in our community.  She and her friends are pretty neat if I can boast a little :)

Well,  I am now going to HULU to watch Damages and veg out becasue I have a TON of work to do tomorrow that should have been done yesterday (UGG) but I don't care - I need to veg... . 

Progress as of today: 12.4 lbs lost so far, only 27.6 lbs to go!

thinnside40 on 02/26/2009:
Have a good night's sleep!

selina on 02/27/2009:
I LOVE the idea of ordering the meals out. Fantastic! I'm for everything that helps out a busy mom to stay on top of things. I've always had help, and I see it as a way of keeping the economy moving... you are helping people out by giving them jobs! Also, it seems to be a very healthy and smart way to use your hard earned money.

Your daughter sounds WONDERFUL! Congratulations to her on her birthday and for being already a LEADER at such young age!

legcramps on 02/27/2009:
Veg away and love every minute of it! We all need time to relax. Have a good weekend.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 02/28/2009:
happy bday to your daughter.

i've never even heard of 7 layer cookies! uh oh!

haha_love2laugh on 02/28/2009:
yummy cookies, although i had my share of delicious treats on my trip.

Glad to see your daughter doing something so good to society.

Cybermom4 - Wednesday Feb 25, 2009
(3 Simple Meals a Day)
Weight: 167.6

Well, I did it - I postd a comment on facebook "preparing meals for the week - I wish I had a cook"    A friend posted back that she had a friend who cooked for her during her busy work season.  I couldn't resist - I asked if I could have her contact info.  Without talking to my husband - I made plans to order two meals from her  and she will deliver them on Sunday.  Well, I just told my hubby about it and he was OK with it - but I think we are both feeling the blues.   Our schedules are busy and we both admit - we don't want the duty of cooking -  Hubby admits he feels like it's my job to prepare meals (like his mom does - she's been a stay at home mom for 50 years) and he just can't get over the feeling that 'that's the way it should be'  -  that's why he basically refuses to cook.   I told him I don't mind being in charge of meals but he has to be willing to accept what I choose to prepare then - even if it's McDonalds one night.  he agreed --  well, now that I have found a lady who LOVES to cook, I think it is sort of embarrassing to think that I cannot make meals for the family.  Like what is wrong with me - every woman feeds their children good helathy meals - now that I don't - I feel like it's some big SIN or something.  Where is this guilt coming from??   Well, I'm not going to cancel the meals and go back to McDonalds - I'd rather have good meals - but this guilty feeling  -- I wish I could understand it - is it wrong for me to buy homemade meals - isn't  desiring these meals better than ordering pizza every friday and subway every wednesday?  Not to mention the cost! and the calories!  I know there are great recipes out there but why am I so lazy I can't put together a meal?  

Sorry for being so pouty - but this guilt has got to go!

Progress as of today: 12.4 lbs lost so far, only 27.6 lbs to go!

thinnside40 on 02/25/2009:
STOPIT!..... If all women were alike, this world would be a very boring place...Some just do not have that instinct or don't have the "cooking gene" in them... I love to cook, but hubby does too fortunately.... I have served cold cereal before and if they don't like it, they have a bounty of foods to choose from in that cupboard... My dad was the way your hubby is in that he liked his meals fixed for him...Now, he is doing it all... My mom hasn't cooked in a while (except for the cookies Saturday - you will have to read about that one sometime).... My mom is not well (dimentina/alzhemer's) and it has been a rapid occurance..My dad is becoming humbled VERY quickly in the process...... As long as you communicate with your family, then they know what to expect or not expect when it comes to meals.....

I'm glad to see you today... I have been having a rough go of it lately and I have to get with this or I'm going to go bonkers......

Have a good day.... And again "STOPIT" with the guilt for something you can't control how you feel about. Taste of Home is having a cooking class here next month..... There are also places where you go on 1 day of the week and fix meals for the whole week or month to put in the freezer.... I have some people I know who do it and LOVE it.... They buy the groceries from a list of recipes given by the business & then they all meet to prepare them together in learning how to make things, etc.... You bring it home in a freezable container (foil trays I assume)....That way if your not home, then someone can just pop it in the oven and it IS HOMEMADE!

P.S. ~ Yes, the pizza,McD's & Subway are costly..... I've been in that "trap cycle" before too.... Yikes!

legcramps on 02/26/2009:
I think getting a few meals brought in for you during your busy weeks is a great idea. I'm not much of a cook either, but my boyfriend would prefer home-cooked meals every day. If I knew that there was something who would bring over pre-made food I would jump on the chance to get it! Think of it this way - you're doing your family right by feeding them healthy, home-cooked meals instead of fast food junk. I think it balances out!!

Cybermom4 - Saturday Jan 03, 2009

Weight: 0.0

thinnside40 on 02/10/2009:
I see you started to do an entry for January 3rd, but haven't seen/heard from ya since December.... Hope all is alright & swinging by to say an early "Happy Valentine's Day" to you!

Cybermom4 - Thursday Dec 18, 2008
(3 Simple Meals a Day)
Weight: 167.6

Just spent 45 min making  CALDO GALLEGO with my 16 yr old Lydia.  It's an extra credit project for Spanish - it smells yummy but it does have kidney beans which are not my favorite. 

My 19 yr old Elliot is out Christmas Caroling with his college and  career group at church - he was all dressed up in dresspants with suspenders - has me wondering if there might be a young lady in the group????

Only 6 more days until Christmas Eve and a break from work - not that I mind my work at all - but getting a chance to sleep in is ....awwwww!  I have a nice long break too (school schedules can spoil you). 

My younger two kids are really really ready for the holiday break - they have been fighting sickness (we all have - I'm still coughing even after 10 days) - but they have continued to attend school becasue they don't like to miss tests or miss class notes.  (I know - they don't sound normal do they) -  (me proud of them)

Well, I've not lost any weight this week but I did watch the biggest loser and saw the amazing transformations that those folks made - if only I had 6 months to focus only on exercise and eating right - I'd look amazing too -  (do I sound frustrated?) -maybe a little - I know in my head all the right things to do - but it seems like I only have the real will power to follow  through in the summer time.  It seems so easy then - and i have my walking buddy in the summer.  Fall and winter - I'm on my own and just dont have the motivation to stick with exercise and 'downsizing'  -   Well,  I'm not going to aganoize over this too much - after all it's Christmas and I have many blessings to count - including my hubby and 4 children - my work and all my friends there - my church and all the friends there - my neighbors, my cozy little house with a fire in the fireplace and coffee in the kitchen - and a computer to work on and a website with the greatest support systerm - Diet Diaries! 

Happy Holidays Everyone!

Progress as of today: 12.4 lbs lost so far, only 27.6 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 12/18/2008:
i love the name elliot because people of all ages have that name. it's my dad's name and it's not too popular of a name but also not too unpopular. i know this couple who named their daughter elliot! kinda strange, but it works. anyways, keep up the great work!

Jen40 on 12/26/2008:
Happy Holidays to you too!!!

thinnside40 on 12/29/2008:
Hope your Christmas was a delightful one & your ready to hit '09 with a bang......

: o )

Cybermom4 - Tuesday Dec 09, 2008
(3 Simple Meals a Day)
Weight: 167.6

The spirit of the holidays is such fun ~  but I'm not fully enjoying the cold weather or my common cold that just hit me yesterday and has me sniffeling all day today -- uggg.  I drank 2 large cups of tea at work - and that's when I really know I'm not feeling well - I'm a hard core coffee drinker and that just didn't appeal to me at all - when I crave tea - I'm sick!  Our holiday party is Thursday evening and I'll probably feel like going to bed instead!  Not really - I wouldn't want to miss the fun.  I am very thankful for all the people I work with - they are very caring and very nice.  I'm not sure how many are in our office - maybe 75-80 - but they are all 'swell' 


Went to the trainer on Sat a.m. - my heart rate went up to 203!  That was hitting pretty high for me - that was after running and catching a football and throwing it back.  I only did it about  8 times but I put all my effort into it!  the good think is my heart rate drops pretty quick and the trainer said that since I have a good recovery time I'm doing OK (would really be embarrassed if I collapsed on the floor!)

Hubby is doing well with the trainer too - I'm not sure he gets the same motivation out of it as I do - I like the challenge and I think hubby would be content to do simple exercises on his own.  But  - I think he'll stick it out for a while anyway.  he is also probably thinking of the pricetag which is a bit 'pricey'  and I do agree but I really like the fact that I'm being trained physically.  I used to be a comptetive swimmer in my younger days - actually not too long ago 1998 I took home 4 medals at the keystone state games in swimming.  I was very proud of those - so I really value sporting and all - but I have to face the reality that I am not in 'athletic shape' now and likely won't be for a long time - but it was fun catching that football and really working out!

Well, I'll just take one day at a time - if hubby decides to not train that's ok - but hopefully we can continue to work it out that I can train.  We'll see.

Happy Holidays Everyone!

Progress as of today: 12.4 lbs lost so far, only 27.6 lbs to go!

thinnside40 on 12/09/2008:
Go!!!!!!!!!.. That is wonderful news to hear that your continuing to "train"... Have to do something we like to get fit or it won't last long.... I played volleyball & softball in my younger days.. I loved it! Still hit the ol' ball in the yard come baseball season for our son... His friends can't believe it!.. They have adjusted though...

Have a wonderful remainder of the week... So good to hear from you!

selina on 12/10/2008:
Hey Cybermom! I knew there was an athlete in you there, somewhere. The competitive type! Congratulations on going back to the training and strenuous exercise. I like swimming, too, although I never did it competitively. I did swim a lot in my mid 20's and gained a LOT of weight after I stopped.... uggg I wish I could go back to swimming... in my opinion, it's the best means of exercising .... I just don't like getting my hair wet, hehe

Cybermom4 - Tuesday Dec 02, 2008
(3 Simple Meals a Day)
Weight: 167.6

Wow !  Has DD changed!!  I'll have to hang out here a little to get caught up on all the new features!

Well, I have gained 7 lbs since my last entry in October 2? - but I'm not going to hit 180 again - I hope!  Hubby and I have started going to the trainer every Saturday - we've been there 2 X's now. He's pricy but honestly  - he's very kind and gives us a good work out !  Now if I could just stay away from the oreos!  I was so good over the summer!  Now with 3 kids lunches to plan for and working full time and ordering fast food  - I'm just on a very bad cycle.  Ugg and the holidays are here - the neighbor sends over pumpkin roll and peanutbutter pie...................Oh my!! --  And we had two weddings - and the list goes on - ---  well, I could be like the rest of the world and start my 'downsizing' Jan 1, 2009. 

Hubby and I are doing much much better (thanks for your prayers thininsideout) - we have been going to counseling every week - we still have some issues to work through and I don't think they will resolve easily - but I am very hopeful and positive.  I do love him and well, after 21 years of marriage - you just don't quit.

Well, I've got to go and watch the biggest loser (I think it's on now) so I wish everyone a good night!

Progress as of today: 12.4 lbs lost so far, only 27.6 lbs to go!

WI3 on 12/02/2008:
Welcome back! And while you may have gained 7lbs since you've been gone...I think the other things you've 'gained' were worth the sidetrack =)

thinnside40 on 12/02/2008:
BL is on here right now.... Off to eat my tuna sandwich and then hit the Gazelle (again).. Running way too late, but had an "bedroom cleaning issue" with the 8 yr old daughter, plus dishes & laundry were staring at me... You don't know how that is do you?!?!?!?!? Ha Ha!... So glad to see you pop in for today.... I always feel sort bad when I say "hello" to you , then you post and entry... I don't want you to feel I'm pressuring you to... I just want you to know that your not forgotten.....

Have a good evening and you WILL not get back to 180... I know it!.. You felt to good getting down to where you were to go back.....

selina on 12/03/2008:
This is a very positive entry and I am so happy for you. You can lose those 7 pounds when things settle down.... Have a great Holiday Season!

Cybermom4 - Monday Oct 27, 2008
(3 Simple Meals a Day)
Weight: 160.6

Yes!! I made it to DD tonight.

I had a banana and a cereal bar and coffee for breakfast. A cereal bar and salas with 1 1/2 T dressing and diet pepsi Drank two bottles of water

Came home and had a handful of candy corn -- (grr - i had to buy that bag yesterday)

Ate 5 small meatballs with sauce and two oreo cookies ( i took 3 but put one back ) and a glass of chocolate milk.

Had an evening cup of decaf coffee and a big glass of water.

I didn't make it to the park but that's ok - I'm working on the eating part now.

I apologize for not visiting your DD posts - I know I'll find encouragement there, but I'm taking baby steps to get back into the right mindset for a helathy me. Once I get back in the habit of journaling my food I'll add a few visits at a time.

I appreciate your kind notes to me !

Well, I have to plan for a busy day at work tomorrow - so good night for now! Have a Super Great Evening or Day!! :)

Progress as of today: 19.4 lbs lost so far, only 20.6 lbs to go!

Maria7 on 10/28/2008:
Hey there! Glad you are doing well! Take care!!!

thinnside40 on 12/01/2008:
Just swingin' by to say "howdy" and been thinking about you with the Holiday Season getting under way......

Hope all is well & your doing good......

Cybermom4 - Sunday Oct 26, 2008
(3 Simple Meals a Day)
Weight: 160.6

Well it's the last week of October. Went to my daughter's soccer game today and it was absolutely beautiful outside. Cool but sunny and our team won! (yippee) The girls had such a good time!

I have been slipping in my eating pretty bad lately. I haven't gotten on the scale in over a week. I last weighed in at 161 - but like I said my eating has been awful. I have not been drinking water and I have yet to go walking at the park. I don't expect to be back at the triner for a while either. Counseling with my hubby is going painfully slow. I know things take time - it's a process, but it is hard to break old habits. Today, hubby and I sat in the living room for over 1/2 hour not saying anything to each other. Finally I left and did some work on the computer. I think we were both sitting and trying to think of something to say to each other but honestly, we just don't 'click' so we walk away. It's been this way for years. We 'dwell' together. It is sad, but when you're used to living this way you don't even realize what you're missing. Oh well --

All that to say, I'm going to focus my mind on my health again. Starting tomorrow! I'm going to have a simple breakfast, a salad for lunch and chicken in the crock for dinner. If the weather is 'not raining' I will go to the park. I made such good progress this summer - I have to get motivated to think of my health and 'downsizing'. I'm going to not worry about my hubby right now - leave him to the counseling and I have to focus on being successful in my eating right.

Well, my youngest daughter is in the other room cheering for the Steelers :) so I think I'll grab my salad and join her for a while.

Well, I hope to be back tomorrow and log in my eating at least! Hope everyone is doing well!

Progress as of today: 19.4 lbs lost so far, only 20.6 lbs to go!

selina on 10/27/2008:
So sorry to hear about your situation with your hubby. However, I'm so glad to hear you are planning on focusing on something you feel you can control - your food intake. I think it's great that you have caught yourself sooner than later and didn't allow the unfettered eating go any longer. We all know it's hard, but it's possible to get back on track - that's what i keep telling myself.... have a good day!

thinnside40 on 10/27/2008:
You do what you need to improve yourself & you can't make anybody else do that for themselves regardless of what it is... Just like us, we have to want it bad enough to do it... Rock bottom comes at all levels for each person. Has to come to that point unfortunatly before one realizes what lies in the trouble is "self" most of the time.....

skinnyjeans on 10/27/2008:
Good idea to focus on yourself a bit, then things will start to improve in other areas of your life, once you feel back in control. :)

Cybermom4 - Thursday Oct 16, 2008
(3 Simple Meals a Day)
Weight: 160.6

Well, things are calm here. Hubby and I are somewhat willing to address our 'rift' but I think in some ways we are afraid of what we will uncover. You see, we go about our business, attempt to communicate, fail, then go back to our business and accept that we will not ever be understood by the other and well, we can live with that as long as we are busy with our work and kids and all. It's kind of sad, but at the same time it's a very safe place to be. It occurred to me today that the saying "you reap what you sow" is really true. I told hubby, that I confess, I haven't been investing in my hubby so naturally, I have grown cold toward him. He agreed and right away said lets plan to go out for dinner tomorrow!! That is Unbelievable - this man will eat a frozen waffle for dinner before he'll take the time and /or accept the cost to take me/or the family out for a dinner. (Hmmm,, the why's of that is something we could address at the counselors.) Well, I certainly don't want to 'finger wag' at a dinner out with my husband - so I will accept and be glad and pray that our conversation will be uplifting and supportive.

You know it's funny - after thinking of the 'you reap what you sow' I kind of want to take an inventory of how I really spend my time. And I have to ask myself a big question, Why did I quit making time for my 3 mile walk? I can say - I'm busy - but really - If my health is important and walking gives me motivation - why do I sit and sit and sit all day long? Honestly - I won't be 'not gaining' if I continue to be sedentary. Ok - my goal for this weekend is to plan a schedule and include my 3 mile walk - one day at a time. I may even start Friday if it is nice out. -- Wish me luck!

Progress as of today: 19.4 lbs lost so far, only 20.6 lbs to go!

skinnyjeans on 10/16/2008:
Good questions...sounds like you are making some good reflection right now. Enjoy dinner with your hubby! Try to stir up a bit of the ol' romance! :)

thinnside40 on 10/16/2008:
I will do better than "wishing"... It is something that has been proven to work time and time again and is very universal in it's method..... I will PRAY about EVERYTHING that is dwelling upon your mind... For you physically to have that "drive" , "tenacity", "want to", "determination", "sheer grit" and then for your marriage to strengthen in the weaknesses..... Patience is needed in all....

(((((BIG HUGS)))))....Can't be small, cause I'm not there yet!

skinnyjeans on 10/16/2008:
Hello again...just read your post on my site about 'skinny jeans'...funny! Yes, skinny jeans are in style and also I want to fit back into my 'skinny jeans', too, that I used to wear a few years ago, so I thought it was a perfect name for me! :)

Cybermom4 - Friday Oct 10, 2008
(3 Simple Meals a Day)
Weight: 160.6

Wow - it is October 10th and my life has been a whirl wind ! Because of a personal family situation that happened two weeks ago, I've had to give up the trainer. I've lost all my motivation to walk just because of all the stress in my life right now. It's not that my life is terrible - and I do have many blessings (I've not gained weight in spite of not exercising yippee) but well, it's marriage stress to be honest. (Now that felt better) Hubby and I are not on the same wave length and haven't been for a very long time. Because of our faith we are faithful to the marriage itself, but honestly we just kind of live together and do our own things. We're not much of a team and honestly, I don't have the energy to 'work on being a team' . We share the responsibilities of the kids and 'taxi driving' etc.. and we can get along ok with that but somtimes I think we both imagine what it would be like if we were not a 'we' and we moved on and went our separate ways. I think we both feel that that is not an option, but we still feel 'trapped' and we cannot get past that feeling I think. We are 'resigned' to the fact that we are a 'we' but in some moments like currently, we know that this isn't right and something (don't know what) has to change.

Well, I have to admit we didn't get this way overnight and we won't change over night (hmmm... sounds just like eathing healthy and downsizing doesn't it) so with that in mind, I will think positive, I will be thankful for my health as it is, I'll be thankful that I can go to work everyday, that I have a car that gets me there and I have money that I can buy a cup of coffee in the morning when I get up late and don't make it at home. I'll be thankful that I can come home to a (reasonably) quiet house and that my kids love for me to study with them every night so they get good grades. I'm thankful that the kids don't mind that I make the same crockpot meals every week and I cheat and buy prepared cookie dough in a tub so we can have 'semi homemade' cookies :)

I have wonderful friends who I can talk to and care AND I have this super DD journal that I can write in and be reminded that I'm among many who are working hard at reaching goals in life and every now and then there is a season of 'blah' and it's OK to journal! ~thanks thininside40 :)~

I wish everyone a super evening!

Progress as of today: 19.4 lbs lost so far, only 20.6 lbs to go!

thinnside40 on 10/10/2008:
Oh..... You know though.I am not a pro, but do know that God allows things to happen that He doesn't necessarily condone..If that makes sense???? Is this preventing either of you to be closer to God???? I often have used the pyramid factor of God at the tippy top point, wife and hubby at the bottom points..... Work upwards the best you can, sometimes just making baby steps and if that doesn't seem to work in a reasonable amount of time...Not trying to be a psych, but just know that God has a plan for you both as long as you seek Him first/foremost in what it is you do... He WILL give you answers my friend and they will be the best for your whole family!

Maybe go ahead and do take a short (or long) walk before the weather gets too yucky... You may find some clarity as you really don't set out to "think" about anything in particular.... Actually if you could get hubby to walk with you, maybe you both could get some clarity away from "the house, kids, have to's and don't want to's"... Again, not trying to be a psych, just wish ya the best and will pray for clarity/peace.....

WI3 on 10/11/2008:
Congrats on not gaining weight! Good luck with the marriage problems. I'm not a counselor and I am only having dating issues, so I can't be of any help. But I do wish you well!

skinnyjeans on 10/11/2008:
Sounds like you DO have a lot to be thankful for! Keep your chin up...we're here for support! :)

thinnside40 on 10/16/2008:
Stopping by for a weekly visit.... "Hi!"

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