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Cynthia - Tuesday Jul 26, 2005

Weight: 255.0

Wassup Jelly Beans? It is S C O R C H I N G I N G in Little Rock Arkansas!

Just wanted to stop by and say HELLO to one of the greatest group of people in the world! I'm not gonna even try and make up an entry other that "howdy doody" ... I'm gonna go speak to everybody personally .... I have missed the heck out of you Beanie Babies!!!!

Sweet Dreams .... ah, make that low fat ... what the heck ... SWEET dreams!!!!

Toodles and Huggles to ya all!!!

sweetpea1977 on 07/26/2005:
Hey M#2,

Thanks for the sweet comment you left me today. Its so nice to see your wonderful words pop up on here!

Stay cool in that hot Arkansas sun!

Love, Jenny

jolt on 07/26/2005:
(((((HUGS CYNTHIA)))))

You can do it one step and one day at a time. Don't give up because you are worth everything! Call me later okay

Hugs and love


Umpqua on 07/26/2005:
Thank you for your kind words, as always. Sometimes we tend to focus more on the negative parts of our lifestyle here, and you make me feel proud of what I have accomplished over the years, something I rarely think about. It's good to have our resident cheerleader back! ;)

sunshine11 on 07/26/2005:
lol you're funny, I dont know where ya went.. but im glad you are back! I look forward to reading your entires for now on! Take care and think healthy!

borntocry on 07/27/2005:
Hi Cynthia,

Thanks for the comment you left me! It's good to know you're still thinking of us. Looks like you've been dealing with that heatwave I've heard about on the news lately. I'm so jealous! It never gets hot here.

Well, keep on keeping on...!

jolt on 06/06/2006:
Cynthia! I saw you finally came back now start posting! I need a way to contact you. I am desperate for a cynthia fix! Please update.

Huggles n love


Cynthia - Tuesday Jul 19, 2005

Weight: 255.0

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am a NUT CASE ... it's taking me a minute to get used to it but I done figured out I might need to go ahead and adjust!!!! I feel like I'm coming back to rehab!!! Now don't go getting all excited .. I ain't been to rehab before ... don't necessarily mean I didn't need to ... I just ain't been .... anywho .... I really just wanted to stick my head in the door and say "hello" ... HELLO!

Hey you guys ... I would like for you to keep me in your prayers and your meditations ... You're the best!

Hey, my daughter was married on July 7 to a WONDERFUL young man. I am so proud of the both of them ... he was actually on the David Letterman show last night playing drums for an entertainer by the name of Jermaine Dupri ... anyways ... it's good to be here just saying hello ....

Later Gators!!!!


sweetpea1977 on 07/19/2005:

Soooo nice to see you!! Congrats in gaining a new son! I sincerely wish your daughter and her new husband a blistful marriage.

As for you, you take care of yourself. We will all be here sending healing thoughts and vibes your way. Im keeping you close to my heart (can you feel the love?)!

Love, Jenny

jolt on 07/19/2005:
Cynthia! (((HUGS))) I have missed you. Hopefully this means you wills top by more often :) Congrats to your daughter



Soon2BThin on 07/19/2005:
Heeeeeyyy, Cynthia!! Good to see you back. Hope you're staying.

tabbylove74 on 07/20/2005:
What a nice surprise it was seeing your name on the list. Don't matter if ya not on the diet...just you saying hello is good enough for me x ...your daughter getting married to a wonderful bloke? Shows you did a good job bringing her up and it sounds like you'll have no worries about her future x

Umpqua on 07/20/2005:
Welcome back - we've missed you around here! COngratulations on your new son, I'm sure he's quite talented to be in the position he's in. Check in with us again soon!

plumpZeta on 07/23/2005:
Cynthia, I looked for you too. I remember you from last month before my move. I hadn't made an entry in awhile. I enjoy reading your diary and am happy for you! Please keep us updated!

Cynthia - Thursday Jun 23, 2005

Weight: 255.0

Hey All!!! This morning I want to go get something from upstairs in the break room so baaaaaad !!!!!!!

Don't know WHY I'm having these terrible cravings!!!! My cycle is ENDING so I can't blame TOM on it ... can I? I'm struggling but I'm HAPPY .. I AIN"T SUCCUMBED yet!!!!!!!

Hey Tabbs I heard a saying this morning and you came to mind ... it was on some commentarty and the gentleman said ... in reference to civic service ... "service is the rent we pay for our space on earth" .... I thought that was pretty cool!!!!

I missed commenting yesterday so I'ma go read and I may come back later and post more!!! Have a great day all!!!

sweetpea1977 on 06/23/2005:
Hey Soldier!

Keep fighting those battles. You are winning! Dont let the enemy enter your territory!! :o)

I just finished leaving you a comment on your previous post....sad story!

Have a good day!

Love, Jenny

tabbylove74 on 06/23/2005:
Hey i like that saying, it is very cool and a nice way of putting it. I feel i have to do helpful things for other creatures to stop myself from being evicted from planet earth, lol. DO NOT succumb to temptation...it will make you feel worse. Like the starving children, they don't have a choice so neither do you. Don't do it Cynth...i'm serious. (serious expression on my face look............pokes tongue out n goes crosseyed).

Umpqua on 06/23/2005:
Thanks for the encouragement as always! I understand the bacon incident - I try not to keep it in the house cause I LOVE the stuff. When I was low carbing I used to eat it all the time without any thought about portion size - bacon and eggs were a standard several days a week. I still love that meal - but I only eat it once in a while and try to only have a few slices. Today will be a better day for you - and if you do need a snack have something healthy! :)

Liza36 on 06/23/2005:
You can do it - don't succumb to those cravings! I'm in it with you, trying to do the same thing. Sometimes you just have to take it minute by minute until it goes away. I find that a change of scenery helps - I get up and walk away from my desk, go get a drink of water, or whatever. Love the comment on civic service. I'm going to remember that one. Good luck today with your goals!

jolt on 06/23/2005:
Breath miss thang! YOu can do it, you will do it! No more snacky snacks for you. Do you hear me. (Oh wait you didn't go there yet) Keep up the great work baby!



Soon2BThin on 06/23/2005:
Hey, girl, you stay outa that break room!! *smack on the hand* You can do it! I know, it's so hard, but you stay strong! Have a great Friday!

Runner on 06/23/2005:
Hi, Sunshine! I know EXACTLY what you mean about those cravings! When I used to work at a school, it was like the teachers' lounge had a strong gravitational pull and I was sucked into it time and again to eat the donuts and other JUNK that always tasted sooo good. Thankfully, our break room here in Taiwan is free of American goodies, or I'd be at least 10 pounds heavier, I'm sure!

Resist it, friend, resist it! You CAN do it! Don't succumb!!!

Loved your quote by the way. I'll have to write that one down.

Keep us posted! Accountability helps us stay on track!!!

Jennifer68 on 06/25/2005:
Just read your post from yesterday. I had no idea Dust Off even existed and now I want to find out if its used in my son's school. I have a son Kyle, and he just turned 16. I can't bear the thought of him doing something as stupid as huffing or dusting. Now I want to know!!! Jen

jolt on 06/29/2005:
Where are you missy?



sweetpea1977 on 06/29/2005:

Just wanted to leave you a little note to let you know that I am thinking of you.

Miss you!

Love, Jenny

Jennifer68 on 07/02/2005:
Okay. no more Mis'us Nice Guy-- I've got my shoes on, keys in hand, and I'm starting the car. If I have to come over there and put you back on this track myself, it is NOT going to be pretty!!! Whatcha hiding from? Little 'ol us?? Honey we are the queens of hiding under the bed!Socome on out-- don't make me come get you!!!!

Cynthia - Thursday Jun 23, 2005

Weight: 255.0

Good morning ... I don't want to use this as a forum for e-mail post ups cause there is so MUCH that circulates and I debated long and hard before deciding to post this. Know that this has NOTHING to do with weight loss and I apologize beforehand if it is offensive to anyone. If you believe I should remove it please email me at cynthiaurquhart@hotmail.com and I will do so. God bless us all.

"DUST OFF" CAN BE LETHAL! First I'm going to tell you a little about me and my family. My name is Jeff I am a Police Officer for a city which is known nationwide for its crime rate. We have a lot of gangs and drugs. At one point we were # 2 in the nation in homicides per capita. I also have a police K-9 named Thor . He was certified in drugs and general duty. He retired at 3 years old because he was shot in the line of duty. He lives with us now and I still train with him because he likes it. I always liked the fact that there was no way to bring drugs into my house. Thor wouldn't allow it. He would tell on you. The reason I say this is so you understand that I know about drugs. I have taught in schools about drugs. My wife asks all our kids at least once a week if they used any drugs. Makes them promise they wont. > >I like building computers occasionally and started building a new one in February 2005. I also was working on some of my older computers. They were full of dust so on one of my trips to the computer store I bought a 3 pack of DUST OFF. Dust Off is a can of compressed air to blow dust off a computer. A few weeks later when I went to use them they were all used. I talked to my kids and my 2 sons both said they had used them on their computer and messing around with them. I yelled at them for wasting the 10 dollars I paid for them. On February 28 I went back to the computer store. They didn't have the 3 pack which I had bought on sale so I bought a single jumbo can of Dust Off. I went home and set it down beside my computer.

On March 1st I left for work at 10 PM. At 11 PM my wife went down and kissed Kyle goodnight. At 530 am the next morning Kathy went downstairs to wake Kyle up for school, before she left for work. He was sitting up in bed with his legs crossed and his head leaning over. She called to him a few times to get up. He didn't move. He would sometimes tease her like this and pretend he fell back asleep. He was never easy to get up. She went in and shook his arm. He fell over. He was pale white and had the straw from the Dust Off can coming out of his mouth. He had the new can of Dust Off in his hands. Kyle was dead.

I am a police officer and I had never heard of this. My wife is a nurse and she had never heard of this. We later found out from the coroner, after the autopsy, that only the propellant from the can of Dust off was in his system. No other drugs. Kyle had died between midnight and 1 Am.

I found out that using Dust Off is being done mostly by kids ages 9 through 15. They even have a name for it. It's called dusting. A take off from the Dust Off name. It gives them a slight high for about 10 seconds. It makes them dizzy. A boy who lives down the street from us showed Kyle how to do this about a month before. Kyle showed his best friend. Told him it was cool and it couldn't hurt you. Its just compressed air. It cant hurt you. His best friend said no.

Kyle's death

Kyle was wrong. It's not just compresses air. It also contains a propellant I think its R2. Its a refrigerant like what is used in your refrigerator. It is a heavy gas. Heavier than air. When you inhale it, it fills your lungs and keeps the good air, with oxygen, out. That's why you feel dizzy, buzzed. It decreases the oxygen to your brain, to your heart. Kyle was right. It cant hurt you. IT KILLS YOU. The horrible part about this is there is no warning. There is no level that kills you. It's not cumulative or an overdose; it can just go randomly, terribly wrong. Roll the dice and if your number comes up you die. ITS NOT AN OVERDOSE. Its Russian roulette. You don't die later. Or not feel good and say I've had too much. You usually die as your breathing it in. If not you die within 2 seconds of finishing "the hit." That's why the straw was still in Kyle's mouth when he died. Why his eye's were still open.

The experts want to call this huffing. The kids don't believe its huffing. As adults we tend to lump many things together. But it doesn't fit here. And that's why its more accepted. There is no chemical reaction. no strong odor. It doesn't follow the huffing signals. Kyle complained a few days before he died of his tongue hurting. It probably did. The propellant causes frostbite. If I had only known.

Its easy to say hay, its my life and I'll do what I want. But it isn't. Others are always effected. This has forever changed our family's life. I have a hole in my heart and soul that can never be fixed. The pain is so immense I cant describe it. There's nowhere to run from it. I cry all the time and I don't ever cry. I do what I'm supposed to do but I don't really care. My kids are messed up. One wont talk about it. The other will only sleep in our room at night. And my wife, I cant even describe how bad she is taking this. I thought we were safe because of Thor. I thought we were safe because we knew about drugs and talked to our kids about them.

After Kyle died another story came out. A Probation Officer went to the school system next to ours to speak with a student. While there he found a student using Dust Off in the bathroom. This student told him about another student who also had some in his locker. This is a rather affluent school system. They will tell you they don't have a drug problem there. They don't even have a dare or plus program there. So rather than tell everyone about this "new" way of getting high they found, they hid it. The probation officer told the media after Kyle's death and they, the school, then admitted to it. I know that if they would have told the media and I had heard, it wouldn't have been in my house.

We need to get this out of our homes and school computer labs.

Using Dust Off isn't new and some "professionals" do know about. It just isn't talked about much, except by the kids. They know about it.

April 2nd was 1 month since Kyle died. April 5th would have been his 15th birthday. And every weekday I catch myself sitting on the living room couch at 2:30 in the afternoon and waiting to see him get off the bus. I know Kyle is in heaven but I cant help but wonder If I died and went to He ll.


sweetpea1977 on 06/23/2005:

Thank you for posting this. Such a sad and scary story. I've heard of huffing and dusting on numerous occasions. Kids are doing it with all kinds of household items these days. I get ID'd every time I buy any kind of aerosol product (usually spray paint). They are also starting to ID folks who buy certain over the counter drugs that kids use in recipes to make a knock off of a certain street drug. Its crazy the length young people do to get a buzz.


tabbylove74 on 06/23/2005:
In my workplace it is an offence to sell solvents to people under the age of 18. If we do, we could incur a PRISON sentence and a 2000 pound fine. Now if shops have to be vigilant then so do parents in the household. My aerosols/cleaning products are in a locked cupboard (with having a 2 year old wandering around). Now the thought of my 9 year old son doing it is impossible to believe, he's responsible. But i get the feeling Kyles parents thought the same about him. Thanks for posting this article Cynthia.

jolt on 06/23/2005:
Thanks for sharing cynthia. Yes that is a highly addictive game here, as well as huffing. Its very sad and very scarey. But most kids think its safe!



Cynthia - Wednesday Jun 22, 2005

Weight: 255.0

*Sings* "Honey Baby can't you see ... ain't nobody bad like me!!!!*** Morris Day and the Time, back in the day that was the song to sing!!!! Now Mr. Day was quite a vain character and he sang his song with much flair and conviction, as he should have; he was an entertainer!

I repeat his phrase this morning not out of vanity (though I would imagine I possess an ant's share of it, lol) but out of affirming the uniquely designed individual I am. I am thanking God daily that he made me like him and I pray to continue to be MORE like him each day.

Every day I will speak more LIFE to myself and to those around me. Oh by the way, don't think for one moment that I believe I am the only "uniquely designed indivual" walking around. It is the positive custom character and traits of you that draw me near to you!!

Gotta go to a meeting this morning so I can't tarry long!

I will have to try my smaller meals plan again today. The idea was to do 5-6 small meals NOT 15-16 which is where I found myself AFTER 5 o'clock PM yesterday .... straight thru till 11 PM!!!! Ummmmm ... think that bag of popcorn set off some kind of carbohydrate craving that wouldn't stop!!!! This IS a new day.

I am holding at 255 and after last night I am THANKFUL!!! I pray it doesn't catch up with me later this week.

Ok all you International Icons have a great journey today ... I'll see ya on the way!!!!


Umpqua on 06/22/2005:
Wasn't Vanity part of the whole Prince entourage back in the day? ;) I think she's OK to have around, but you don't want her headlining the show every night! We all have those carb cravings, so don't beat yourself up over it. Today is a new day so you can jump on in!

jolt on 06/22/2005:
Morning You,

Remember you are worth it! Have a good meeting (if there is even such a thinng as a good meeting) Keep up the excellent work!

Huggles and love


sandrella on 06/22/2005:
Didn't they also sing "Jungle Love"...it keeps popping in my head. I'll be singing it all day now and get lots of funny looks! LOL It'll be worth it. Like you said today is a new day to stomp on the carbohydrate beast! I know you can do it!

SAndi :)

sweetpea1977 on 06/22/2005:
Lord help me! I dont know who Morris Day is! But, the message he sung is very true. Each of us is a beautiful and unique creature and we should celebrate that! Of course, celebrate in a healthy fashion! :o)

Today is a new day and I have faith that you will make the most of it! 5-6 meals max, young lady! :o)

Have a good one! Make the most of it!



tabbylove74 on 06/22/2005:
LMAOOOOOOO are you getting someone to hold a full length mirror for you! I KNOW who Morris Day is!! yayyyyyyyyyyyy (i seen purple rain a million times)

Cynthia - Tuesday Jun 21, 2005

Weight: 255.0

Good morning Rug Rats!!!! I am experiencing such a state of tranquility right now that it's rather challenging for me to explain. This can not be attributed to just one area of my life but to all areas of my life. I know that it is all a part of the process of learning to live.

I am very thankful for this forum of DD that's served as a tool to keep me focused on the weight issue and I am also grateful that my consciousness is continously being heightened so that I have a care and concern not only for myself but for others. I won't go into detail on that but I'll just say that this is a very positive, supportive, and healing atmosphere to be a part of.

I have had to rid some things, and some people from my life because they were not good energy sources in my life and they did not allow me to provide them with the positives energy I have been blessed to receive. It is not with sadness that I release those things and people but it is with hope that the people would go on to find an environment that would allow them to be all they were designed to be.

Living in one's purpose or as I like to say "one's custom design" is most fullfilling. Ok, I'll get off that tangent this morning. Not exactly "weight loss" tip but it was on my heart .....


Ok, I am geeked up and EXCITED ... come on say it with me ... ok ok I won't go there today, lol. However I am definitely excited about today's journey. I am concerned about my memory so I went to Wild Oats last night and bought some Ginko Biloba ... I FORGOT to bring it with me this morning!!!! I am tempted to run home and get it or maybe just go buy another bottle so that I'll have one here and one at home.

I am going to try and incorporate the 5-6 smaller meals way of eating as opposed to my 2 pretty darned decent sized lunch salad and dinner meal .... having a bowl of mixed fruit now (I usually skip breakfast) and a cup o green tea with 17 ozs of water.

I read this quote yesterday and thought I would share it with you ... hold on ... I don't remember it ... I gotta go find it ... be right back .... ok found it ...

"Growing old does not make us sick, it's growing sick that makes us old." ...Tim Morrow

Enjoy your journey today.

xoxo Cynthia


1:00 Walked for 30 minutes on my morning break.

37 ozs of water down

Ate the enitre Ceasar Salad I had for lunch. That's OK ... I'll skip my 2:30 feeding, lol.

Plan on having fruit around 4 or 5 and the other 1/2 of my egg salad for dinner!

I'm feeling pretty good!!!

Liza36 on 06/21/2005:
You are on an incredible journey of not only weightloss but of discovery in other areas of your life. You are right when it comes to positive influences around you. Life is hard enough to have negative energy on top of it as well.

You mention that this is a supportive and positive site. You definitly add to that atmosphere because your posts always have encouragement and I appreciate that. Thanks for your comment to me yesterday. It was great to receive it on my first day posting at DD.

Keep it up!

Umpqua on 06/21/2005:
Sorry Cynthia, I had to laugh at the Ginko Biloba story ;) I just read an article that folic acid is also good for preventing memory loss. I already take it as part of my multivitamin, as it's also a good prep for childbearing, should I ever decide to take the plunge there. Your small meals plan sounds great, and fruit is always a good way to start the day. Enjoy your tranquility!

jolt on 06/21/2005:
Good Morning Cynthia!

What a great day to be alive! Then sun is shining, and even if it wasn't I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!

Thanks for keeping me sane, when I thought a little rubber room was where I needed to be! It is hard to let go of Unhealthy relationships ect in your life. I know I am doing the same thing! We will get through it!

We are worth every bit of effort and time that we put into ourselves!

Love ya baby



sweetpea1977 on 06/21/2005:
YAY Cynthia is back in business. I havent seen you this excited about dieting and exercising in a long time. I love your 5-6 meals/day plan. I think it actually recommended that people eat more frequently (smaller portions of course) for several reasons. Of course, for dieting purposes, it helps the dieter feel less deprived of food (and less hungry), which automatically decreases the chances of the dieter to snack on something naughty.

My fiance just started taking Ginko Biloba to improve his memory. He refers to them as his "Stupid Pills"! LOL. Anyway, it says on the box that it takes 4 weeks to notice an improvement and the box doesnt contain enough of the pills to cover the 4 weeks. Marketing ploy!

Anyway, Im glad that you are getting rid of the negative forces in your life and surrounding yourself with positive ones. You will be a much happier person with all those positive vibes around ya!

Enjoy your meals and exercise (good work yesterday, BTW!).

Have a wonderful day!

Love, Jenny

tabbylove74 on 06/22/2005:
Your Gingko Biloba joke was hilarious. That stuff's expensive so remember to use it! Sounds to me like you found your happy place. That's a great place to be in. Good on ya for distancing yourself from negative energies that were bringing you down...what can i say? Some people don't want to be helped i guess. I think they love the attention lol. Exercise and salads...what a great combination!

Jennifer68 on 06/22/2005:
I call people like that ENERGY VAMPIRES! They steal your energy and eventually, if left to, they will suck you dry. Best to declutter your life of them. Its actually a kind thing to do for yourself and for them at the same time. You give them the chance to grow from being removed from their host or move on to someone else, and you get relief from the pain they cause.

And Hey Cynth, you sound great today!! Your eating plan sounds gorgeous and healthy. You are too!!! lol Hugs and hugs and hugs, Jen

Cynthia - Monday Jun 20, 2005

Weight: 255.0

Good morning America and Abroad!!! How bout I was coming in here this morning, gonna go upstairs to the break room and buy all kinds of stuff to stuff myself with. Just feels like one of those sausage, biscuit with gravy mornings oh yeah and a bowl of fruit and a muffin too!!! Well, I had REALLY geeked myself up to doing this thinking "what the heck, it's Monday, it's gonna be a minute before things get better!" ... then I recalled my pact with myself and to you guys to weigh every day till I got back to 250 ... I really wanted to shove that to the side too but there was the fear that unlicensed pilots would swoon down in their homemade aircraft from Europe, Asia, Canada, the ATL, the East Coast and who knows from where else SOOOOOOO. I was sceaaaaaaaaaaarrrrred they would decend on top of me beautiful head and mess up my hair sooooooo I decided to step my GORGEOUS self up on the scales and BAM!!! "5" "FIVE" say it with me F. I. V. E. heavy ones GONE say it with me G. O. N. E. soooooooooooo ... I'll be going to fix me a cup o green tea, 34 ozs of water and MAYBE a cup of oatmeal!!!

Thanks for the accountability Queens ... you're starting me off with a great day and an even more porductive week!!!!

I luvs ya Bunny Wabbitts!!! Just keep swimming!



10:30 Walked for 30 minutes

Drank 34 ozs. water 2 C Green Tea 1 large Ceasar Chicken Salad


Sandrella, quit giving Tabbs tips on kicking the Panda!!!



34 more ozs down!!!! 2:27


And before the evening was done I had added yet another 34 ozs of water and read up on colon cleansing .

Bought some Ginko Biloba today for memory from Wild Oats and also had 1/2 an egg salad sandwich from Wild Oats. That thing was delicious!

I can honestly and proudly say ... it was a good, balanced, controlled day! Annnnnnnnnd, I was the one in control!!! Thank you Lord!!!

sweetpea1977 on 06/20/2005:
Hi M#2,

AWESOME! 5 pounds gone!! Good for you! Im glad you thought about your pact and us gals when you saw those temptations! Keep it up!!

So you met a guy from Louisiana! Oh boy, how exciting!! Im happy for ya!! Keep me posted on the blooming friendship/relationship!! :o)

Enjoy the green tea, water, oatmeal, the rest of your day, the rest of the week, month and year!! :o)

Love, D#2 (Jenny) *************** 230pm EST

Wow! Good job on the eating, drinking, and walking! Keep it up!!! :o)

Umpqua on 06/20/2005:
Congratulations on the loss! It sounds like things are really looking up for you Cynthia, and you deserve it :)

tabbylove74 on 06/20/2005:
I want to wire this bloke up to a lie detector machine. Would we approve of him Cynthia? Does he have his own hair/teeth..is he a responsible citizen...does he have a job? 5lbs gone!!!! Is it cos ya in LURRRRVE now? ya want to KISS him ya want to HUG him! You sound genuinely happy today, i'm chuffed for ya.

sandrella on 06/20/2005:
LOL! I just couldn't help myself Cynthia! I wanted to be sure that panda got what was coming to him! Congrats on the FIVE! Way to go! I knew you could do it! Keep it up and have a great day!

PS..Jolt is still waiting on me to join her in the under 200 race...so I'm challenging myself as well!

Sandi :)

Liza36 on 06/20/2005:
Congrats on the 5 pounds gone. That's incredible! Can't wait till I can say that! Way to go. Thanks for your comment, I can already tell the support here is fantastic.

Runner on 06/20/2005:
5 pounds GONE!!!!!!!!!!! You go, girl! And I hope that continues to inspire you say NO, NO, NO to the food in the break room! Stick with that tea and oatmeal...and you'll see 5 more gone before you know it!!

Jennifer68 on 06/21/2005:
WTG Cynthia! I am so proud of you!! Yes, you are the one in control. Come bsicuits and gravy, come muffins or high water, you WILL reach your goal. I have NO doubt. Hugs, Jen

Cynthia - Friday Jun 17, 2005

Weight: 260.0

First things FIRST!!!!! Tabby I am afraid that should you EVER develop a brain this world would suddenly become a dull place!!!! You are NUTS!!!!! You need your own SHOW ... let me manage you ... PLEASE!!!!! lol lol!!!

Next ... I made it thru yesterday in a decent fashion!!! I did not overeat. (After my earthquake beginning!) I had planned what I was going to do and I stuck to it... got a little anxious around 9 o'clock ... luckily I had some yogurt in the fridge (low-fat) I had one of those and ... it got me thru. I am gonna weigh myself everyday (cept Sat & Sun cause I AIN'T GOT NOT SCALES AT HOME) till I get back down to 250.

I kinda knew I was gonna go beserk but who would have figured a 10 pound gain in 2 weeks!!! I had been eating like a run-a-way 3 headed 2 bootied rhino-sa-rus!!!! lol

Will get in some exercise. I ain't depressed ... just taking a reality check!!! Glad I did it at 260 rather than 270!!! There is always a bright side ... somewhere!!!

Toodles... have a good day Cup Cakes!!!

Runner on 06/17/2005:
HI, Cynthia! I finally got caught up on your latest entries. Good for you to make it through yesterday in a decent fashion! Remember---one day at a time. And I believe God really does want to help us overcome those temptations that are put in front of us---those FOOD temptations! Remember, He cares about every little detail---even how much hair is on your beautiful head! (And you have some cool hair, friend!) So stay strong today! I'm going to go brush my teeth as soon as I'm done writing, because a 200-calorie Stroopwaffle is calling my name! But I am STRONGER than the Stroopwaffle, right? And just typing this to you has inspired me to quit snacking while I'm ahead!!!

Jennifer68 on 06/17/2005:
Nope, don't be depressed, just get on that track and start chugging 'I think I can, I think I can!!' & it will work itself out.

Here's what's inspiring me of late: Sex! For some reason its all I can think about!!! I've heard that women reach their peak in their 30's and now I find (for me)its absolutely true. Ugh... my poor hubs. Think I'm going to accidentally kill him.

I do weigh every day because it keeps me on my toes. I can manage small slip-ups easier if I see that it showed up right away on the scale. One week is too long for me to go without weighing-- it gives me too much time to think I can afford this litle cookie or that rice crispy treat. And the truth is -- I LIE to myself!!! But the scale don't lie!!! Well, unless I manage to convince myself I broke it somehow, lol. Then I'm in trouble.

You're doing great Cynthia. One day at a time. Just one day at a time and we'll get there. Hugs, Jen

tabbylove74 on 06/17/2005:
...lets talk showbiz over green tea and a fruit salad you ravishing beauty (links arms)...ready to sashay darling?

sweetpea1977 on 06/17/2005:
LOL on Tabby's comment. She is a nut but I love her nonetheless. :o)

I am so proud of your efforts yesterday. I like the idea of you weighing in almost everyday. Maybe it is just what you need to get yourself back on your track! You are already on your way with the good deeds you performed yesterday as well as the positive attitude you have about today! :o)

Have a good day!

Love, Jenny

Jennifer68 on 06/17/2005:
Hey I ASKED for someone to kick me, remember?? And guess what? TOM still didn't arrive. Ah poop!! But at least I have this one success to think about today. I am wearing my size 14 Levis and baby, I feel good! lol.

jolt on 06/17/2005:
Hey Baby!

Glad you realized the run away train had to stop before it was too late. You can get back to 250 I believe in you. Make an inspiration board like I did, I see it every night and every morning when I get up. Helps keep my get up and go get up and going LOL.

Huggles to you! ((start dancing missy!))

Love ya


borntocry on 06/18/2005:
Hi Cynthia,

Thanks for your comments! I am in America now and enjoying all the fine food your country has to offer, hehe! I'm in Cincinnati, visiting my in-laws and attending a couple of weddings (and a baseball game on Monday!!).

I know what you mean about eating like a runaway rhinosaurus, hehe. It does seem unfair to have gained ten pounds in two weeks - it's always so much easier to gain weight than to lose it! But the important thing is not to look back - what's done is done and you can only move forward now. I am impressed at your resolve!

Cynthia - Thursday Jun 16, 2005

Weight: 260.0

I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAAAAARRRRR!!!! "roar" ... Ok so this morning I have had an Apple Cinnamon muffin (definitely not the FF kind) and 5 mini sized pig in the blankets ... who doesn't know what a pig in the blanket is? Tabbs ... I knew you would NOT know ... Jolt ... you know EVERYTHING ... I know you know SweetP ... Jenny, maybe yes maybe no. So, why don't I tell ya. It's a small sausage wrapped in a piece of dough. Simple huh? Yeah, it really is. Put a little mustard on it and bam!!! Now, neither one of those items were anyways near "healthy". But, I intend to salvage the rest of the day ... how bout let's say the muffin was breakfast ... I estimate it at 350 - 400 calories ... and let's say the pigs in the blankets were another 400-500 calories ... so that leave me about 500 calories for the day.

If I were wise (and I am when I wanna be) I could still salvage this day. I'll start by going to have some water and I'll plan on a healthy snack around 3 ...

You guys ... I wanna be 199 by summer's end so bad I can almost taste it!!!!

Crazy busy at work ... hopefully I'll be back and post and read some more today!!!!



OK. I know any time I stay AWAY from the scales I'm on a downward spiral (actually I guess this would be called an upward spiral) so, "screech"! Brakes on. Starting here, starting now ... I'm going back to the word actually hold on a second ... I'm gonna go to an entry I made a few years ago under the name CYNTHIE to see if I can cut and paste and REMIND MYSELF of what I'm trying to do. I refuse to give ALL THE WAY UP ... I REFUSE ... hold on I'll be back when I find it... (12:23 pm)


OK, it's now 12:55 ... I have been searching and searching and I cannot for the life of me find the old entry. That's OK. I am still rededicated to doing what I already know to do. Less and More plan for me. Less food - more movement. How much more simple can it be ... what is it gonna take for me to grasp and hold on to that simple principle!!!

Ok, let's deal with excuses I could use ... TOM .. it's here! Yay. No, boo .. it's come EVERY freaking month.

"I'm insane". Sorry, that won't fly either ... took a test. Sane as a, well, as anyone sane; just looking for an excuse.

Ok, there are none. These are my choices. I can plan the rest of my day. I'll start right now. Gonna go and get my other 17 ozs of water and finish that before 1:30 .. I'll have fresh fruit for snack(s) and a Chicken Ceasar salad from Fazoli's for dinner. I will also go to the gym before 10 o'clock tonight. And, I mean I will go there if I do nothing BUT walk over to it!

Geeeshhh ... I've gotta make a difference this summer yall. I gotta.

"Lord, I'm asking you to please guide me thru this day. I want to surrender my mind and body to you. I want to live for you. Help me. Thank you."

sweetpea1977 on 06/16/2005:
I cant wait to see what you're writing! :o)


Oh man, I love pigs in a blanket. That is definitely a Southern treat!

Im glad that your are making yourself aware of the calories you are taking in. It helps you learn how to budget your daily intake of foods. I've learned if I train myself to enjoy low cal foods I am able to enjoy more food throughout the day. :o)

I have a wonderful suggestion that may help guide you on your weightloss journey. It is a book called "French Women Dont Get Fat" by Mireille Guiliano. I picked it up the other day and started reading it to see what the French woman's secret is to staying thin while eating all the foods she enjoys. Well, as I begin reading it, I realized I was doing most of the stuff she suggested!! Then I realized, duh, I have a French background (my last name clearly announces Im of French ancestry!!), so it must be in my genes. Then I realized that it was just plain common sense mixed in with some helpful tips!

Anyway, I did not do every thing she suggests, but have been (unknowingly) following her main concept of eating and exercise. It is a pretty easy concept that guarantees a 30 pound loss to anyone who stays dedicated to her ideas. I know, it isnt exactly the 199 goal that you are looking for, but it could be a wonderful kickstart to your journey. :o)

Have a great day!

LYLAM, Jenny

Bandmom on 06/16/2005:
OH! oh! i KNOW WHAT PIGS IN THE blanket are! I love them!MMMMMMMM Love you! Rosalind

tabbylove74 on 06/17/2005:
(Haughty expression)...actually i knew, i've had them before at Momma Cherri's Soul Food Shack..Momma Cherri is originally from south USA, and she runs an exquisite little restaurant in Brighton, England. The food is GOOOOOOOD! and actually i think you were rather rude for waking the pigs! Do you know what devil on horseback is? (strolls away pulling knickers out of me bum)

Cynthia - Tuesday Jun 14, 2005

Weight: 250.0

Good morning all you living breathing creatures!!! It is a beautiful day in the neighborhood!!! I think most of the time I neglect the fact that this is a forum for weight loss. Not intentionally ... then again maybe it IS intentional because I am not/have not been "on track"! So, like a child I figure if I come out and I start talking about everything BUT my weight, I can distract you long enough to say hi, check on you and scram outta here. I am pretty smart, huh?

I wanna say that today I am gonna go full force but I love ya too much ta lie to ya!! I wanna go, but the "umph" is not there. I ain't gone completely beserk, I'm just not FOCUSED which is the key motivator for me!!!!

I don't want to say a whole bunch of crappy stuff cause I think this is the BEST site and 99% of everybody out here is doing an outstanding job either losing or maintaining ... for that other small percent of us who just can't get the rhythmn going right now DON'T GIVE UP ON US or think we've quit the race ... WE HAVE NOT ... we've just kinda lost our pace right now!!!

So, for now, let me keep coming and rattling and reading ... pretty soon I'll be back on top and you know me and my GORGEOUS self will be bragging on how WONDERFUL I am every tittle of the way!!!

Soon2BThin ... I am 45 and I do vaguely remember Howdy Doody ... I don't know if I actually remember watching the show or if I just remember hearing about it cause the name Howdy Doody's been around a loooooonnnnnnnngggg time!

Got a proverb for ya:

"The fools look for dung where the cows never browsed." ~Ethiopia~

Enjoy your journey. xoxo cynthia

sweetpea1977 on 06/14/2005:
Hey Cynthia,

Good entry! The last thing I do whenever someone is out of rhythm is give up on them! Instead, I try to send them words of encouragement and support. I think everyone does that here, because we all care about each other. We celebrate our victories with each other as well as pick up our fallen sisters and help put them back together again. That is what makes this community a strong and successful group! :o)

I'll be thinkin of ya today.

Love, Jenny

borntocry on 06/14/2005:
Hi Cynthia!

I know what you mean about not being in the rhythm right now. I've been reading the diaries on this site for a year and I think every one of us has been through times like that. Weight loss takes a lot of motivation, a lot of planning, and a lot of concentration, and sometimes one just cannot devote oneself to it the way one would like!

Last year at one point I became so depressed and demotivated that I took a break and didn't update my diary for two months. I just couldn't bear to even think about it. At least you are planning to keep reading and posting! Eventually I'm sure you will find the motivation you need to get back into the rhythm of things.

Oh, and by the way, I used to love Mr Roger too!

jolt on 06/14/2005:
Hey Miss Thang!

Okay I see you need a good butt kicking and then a big hug! You can do it. Lets start this week with just getting water in each day okay. So 8 glasses a day!

You can do it!

Huggles and lots and lots of love


Soon2BThin on 06/14/2005:
Oh, you young thang, you!! I wish I could go back and be 45 again! Honey, you keep on coming here, we love ya anyway! You'll get on track, things just don't change overnight! Keep at it and don't give up!

tabbylove74 on 06/15/2005:
I'm going through the same thing right now..you're not alone you see lol.

sweetpea1977 on 06/16/2005:
Hey M#2,

Thank you for the heatstroke sermon. :o) Its nice knowing that my Cynthia is looking out for me. I had no idea how bad it was going to effect me until it was too late. I suffered lightheadiness and a migraine for two days because of it. I definitely learned my lesson from it and it will not happen again! :o)

In the words of 2-Pac.."I ain't mad atcha". I aint got nothin but love for ya! Come here for a hug!

Hope you are faring well!

Love, Jenny

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