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Donkey - Sunday Nov 28, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 136.5

A late log-in today, because I ended up going to the gym this morning, and if I wanted to get done all that I wanted to get done, my morning computer time would have to be delayed.  It didn't help that I didn't get out of bed until almost 6am!  These weekends make  me wonder how I manage to get up at 5am during the week.

So yesterday (Saturday) at lunch, I had my last piece of apple pie.  Just came to the conclusion that I had had my slices over the holiday, and now I was done.  Husband finished it off for lunch.  Also, I announced to Daughter on Friday night that the rest of the pumpkin pie was for her.  I think it was Thursday when I mentioned to her that the last 2 gluten free dark chocolate cupcakes are for her as well.  This has helped me, because I just finished lunch, and really want a dessert.  I had a few gulps of vanilla protein shake instead.  I'm good to go.

Last night, I had so much protein that I did not even want dessert.  I had some sleepytime tea instead and I was fine.  I finished up some deli turkey that didn't have much time left.  It was still good, but not for much longer.  So I ate more than what I probably normally would have had.  It was VERY satisfying and filling.

This morning, I took that dumbbell class at the gym again.  I'm REALLY feeling it in my arms right now.  I wonder if I will feel it tomorrow.  I actually hope not, because this is quite inconvenient.  Anyway, about the class, the lady I had hoped to be next to - and hoped maybe we could make a connection eventually - chose a spot way far away from me.  So that's not going to happen.  And I'm having some mixed feelings about being in a closed classroom with people breathing heavy.  I'm the only one who wears a mask throughout the whole class.  (I wear a mask the whole time I'm in the building, actually, and I'm one of the very few who do so.)

The minute I walked into the studio, the stench of garlic overcame me.  Oof!  Someone in the previous class had had a garlicy dinner last night and was breathing it and sweating it out today.  Also, the instructor said that it felt to her like something was not quite right with the air conditioning, which means that the air filters (for COVID) probably weren't working right too.  Bleah.  Well my chosen spot was socially distanced and near the door - which remained opened the whole time.  It was a very challenging class, even more so with the garlic and stuffiness.

Daughter surprised me today by announcing that she has a day off today!  She and Husband are watching a football game I don't care about, and Husband wants me to join in soon, which I will when I'm done here.  I also need to read more of Library Book #2, because it's due on Wednesday.  I will turn it in late, next Saturday, so that I can try harder to finish it.

So my plans for today: rest & read, pick up CBD stuff I ordered from a local farm, drop off aluminum cans at the animal shelter (part of their fundraising).  Prepare myself mentally for this week at work, and in particular, for tomorrow, when I have to go in 30 minutes earlier.  It's an office rule that after a holiday weekend, the next workday you have to come in 30 minutes earlier or you don't get the holiday pay.  I kid you not.  And I will tell you why.

A couple of years ago, the Boss had a 9am closing the Monday after a holiday and he couldn't find the damn file.  So he was late for the closing.  In the meantime, because it was a holiday weekend, the phones were ringing off the hook with "emergencies".  He was upset because we were all running a little late, and there was nobody around to help him.  So now we all have to come in 30 mintues early.

I'll talk about my December goals a little bit now, since it's the weekend, and I have more time to write now, than I will on Wednesday morning.  Rather than having a solid monthly goal, I plan to have smaller, weekly goals.  The first week will be shorter, because 12/1 falls in the middle of the week, of course.  I think this approach will allow me some flexibility and perhaps keep things more interesting.  I noticed this month that the November daily push-up goal has been very trying.  Some of the challenge is in the remembering to do them, but also, some of it is soreness, which may be due to the heavier weight training.  

So anyway, that's what I've been planning for myself for next month.

Progress as of today: 50 lbs lost so far, only 1.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 11/28/2021:
WOW...That is quite amazing that you could even smell the garlic through the mask!!! So the boss doesn't prepare ahead for his closing and everyone gets their hands slapped...He is quite the piece of work..........Love you goals for next month!!!

Horn_of_plenty on 11/28/2021:
lol, re below, i'd NEVER wait in line for a coffee/choc advent calendar or anything similar either. i dislike lines also ! :)

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Donkey - Saturday Nov 27, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 136.5

Judging by the number on the scale, you can tell that it was a yummy holiday!  Well... I may not be able to reach my fighting weight for the Doctor's appointment in 2 weeks.  Oh, I won't give up.  No, never give up.  But in the past, Thanksgiving usually kicks off a month of eating, and it's been a struggle.  The scale is going in the wrong direction, though, and NOW is the time to put on the breaks, especially since I'm a little above goal weight :-(  Disappointing. The struggle is real and ongoing.

Although yesterday's conversation, with my Husband, about weight training was not the best, it pushed me to see if I could go heavier than I have been doing in the past.  And I could!  And I could probably go even higher, if I would be content with doing on 6-8 reps, but there's something in me that doesn't feel right unless I do 12-15 reps.  10  minimum.  3 sets  minimum.  This is where I feel that I could benefit from working with a trainer.  But not a trainer from the gym that I go to, as most of them are overweight, and the one I worked with --- well, we know how that ended.  

I put up outside Christmas lights (not a lot, but since I'm the only one putting up and taking down, it's enough), and I was glad that I did that.  My next door neighbor has not put up any lights, and usually he does a respectable show.  (Halloween is when he really goes "all out", but he does Christmas too.)  I hope everything is OK.  It's a lot of work, but seeing the Christmas lights cheers me up -- and I think this will be very helpful for my own peace of mind when I come home, in the dark, after work.

Advent starts this Sunday, and for once, I have my pink candle way ahead of time.  Having the candlelight at dinner will be nice and cheery too.

So while I feel rather "dull" about the holidays --- I'm not really excited or energized by it this year --- I feel that I'm in a good spot about it.  Some years are full of travel and excitement and visiting, and other years (like this one) are more about calm, quiet, and relaxing. I'm really OK with the way this year is coming to an end.

Today is Saturday, and so I'll be doing Saturday things, which I love to do (seriously):

  • My laundry - DONE
  • Fill bird feeders (again) & provide fresh water. - DONE
  • Read Library Book #2 - NOT YET
  • Do a little online Christmas shopping - DONE
  • Organize my recycling - DONE (sufficiently)
  • Winterize chairs on deck by moving to & stacking them on the front (covered) porch. - DONE
  • Gym - upper body day, gonna try higher weights all the way around - DONE!!!
  • Work on December goals. - NOT YET


Progress as of today: 50 lbs lost so far, only 1.5 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 11/27/2021:
Meh on the trainers. What about a weight-lifting class at a junior college or extension program? It feels like you need a few friends who lift more than a trainer.

Donkey on 11/27/2021:
Seriously contemplating this.

Donkey on 11/27/2021:
I think you're right: I need a support group of peeps who also like to lift. It would be nice if they were older gals like me, but it could be younger serious gals, or even dudes.

*sigh* I don't know where to find peeps like that - at least not at my gym. There used to be a local gym that was for mostly weight lifting - like serious lifters (no cardio bunnies), but they went out of business when COVID hit :-( The former owner still trains, but I'm pretty sure he's not at my gym.

happy-1 on 11/27/2021:
Right? Pity you are so far away. THAT is a girls night I could get behind. It would almost be a fun social thing for a gym to run… An Athena first wednesday of the month night for women to come lift and spot each other.

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
Right??? I would love this!

happy-1 on 11/27/2021:
Meetup has weightlifting groups… I mean you could bodybuild and maxamize your best ass-et. https://www.meetup.com/topics/weightlifting/

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
Ohhh, that's a good idea! This never occurred to me. I'll do some research.

happy-1 on 11/27/2021:
Search women bodybuilding groups

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
OK - I will look into this. :-)

Jacky82020 on 11/28/2021:
Haha, Donk, I always stress out about my weight prior to PCP visits too. As I mentioned, I’ve refused to step on their scale many times over the years.

Wish you lived nearby and could visit me and my incredible gym. I called it studio quality once & Matt said: No! It’s pro quality.

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
I already know that going into my PCP visit, my weight won't be accurate because it's at 2pm. So I will have coffee, water, and 1-2 meals in my tummy by the time it comes to weigh in. This is why I wanted to get below my nice weight of 132-133.

I love seeing pictures of people's home gyms - what they do. I think yours is one of the best I've seen. There's one lady who lives in an apartment, and she has her squat rack set up in her living room. Her husband is OK with that. What a gem!

bearcountrygg on 11/28/2021:
Holidays are supposed to be yummy....so it was a GREAT ONE!!!! Good job getting your outdoor things done...you are way ahead of me.

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
Yes, it was a great one -- one of the best ones I've had. I really enjoyed just relaxing and going with the flow.

Ah, believe me, I didn't do all that much as far as Christmas decorations outside, because I have in my mind having to brave the cold temperatures afterwards to put everything away. Still, Christmas lights bring cheer to me, so I'm glad that I did this.

The rest of the winterization stuff -- again, minimal in what we take out, because it all has to get put away later on. I've been working on this a little bit at a time over the weekends. I have to say, I really lucked out with the weather this year.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/28/2021:
oh yeah,it's great to have the home gym alternative for times you cannot get to the gym. during my walk last night with my friend, it was dark out, we saw someone had fabricated an entire gym in their two-car garage space complete even with a TV. we could see in because the lights were on, bright, and we saw the tv on and gym equipment thru the windows of the garage. It was a big house, so i couldn't believe they couldn't put the gym somewhere else!? when it snows, they'll have to clean their cars...haha, maybe they don't care enough and the gym is most important! it was a pretty big gym, to fill a two car garage!

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
Ha ha ha -- priorities, Horn. It's all about priorities - LOL!

Frankly, I'd have a hard time giving up my garage for a gym, since you and I have snowy winters. I want my car to be sheltered, but apparently, not a lot of people do, judging by folks in my neighborhood who park outside all year round, due to the amount of junk stored in the garage!

Horn_of_plenty on 11/28/2021:
being mindful and remaining calm are also behaviors i am looking to improve upon :)

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
Me too, SO MUCH. I'm getting better at it, but it's a work in progress :-)

Horn_of_plenty on 11/28/2021:
i have heard of these advent calendars. have you ever done those? where they have little gifts in them each night? for instance,my friend has a beauty advent type of calendar and in each day there's a sample perfume/cream/etc...have you heard of that!? i believe it's the 30 days before Christmas?

Nice job getting your saturday goals accomplished. hope to hear more from you today!

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
Ohhh, your question takes me back to when the kids were little. They would each get an Advent calendar, either from my mom or us, and each night, they would open another window and find a piece of chocolate.

The chocolates were in the shape of Christmas things and toys, so we'd try to guess the shape of the chocolate before they opened the door, e.g. train, snowflake, Santa hat, ice skate.

THIS year, I was kind of feeling the Christmas spirit, so I had planned to pick up Advent calendars for us here, with nice chocolates. One kind was a coffee Advent calendar! Unfortunately, they all sold out immediately, with people lined up, waiting for them to be re-stocked. Definitely not my thing, so it didn't happen this year.

Jacky82020 on 11/28/2021:
Yeah, I’m always heavier on this doc scales too. Time of day & clothed. I remove my shoes & wear lightweight clothing, but it’s always up 3-5 pds over my naked no food drinkless AM weight. I asked if they take off pds for clothing before calculating BMI & she said no.

Once the added weight moved me from upper normal range to low overweight. Sad!

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
One time, I weighed in with my key fob in my pocket, loaded with keys. IDGAF at the time.

happy-1 on 11/28/2021:
Wear an outfit made of parachute silk and kick off your shoes!

Donkey on 11/28/2021:
LOL! I'm planning on lightweight leggings. Haven't figured out the top part yet.

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Donkey - Friday Nov 26, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 134.0

It was a nice Thanksgiving and now I am enjoying Friday off as well.  It feels like a weird day.  I cut my morning bike ride short by 10 minutes so that I could go to the store with Husband.  He didn't want to go alone, and so why not.  I can finish my bike ride later -- except that I haven't done so yet.  But I know I will.

I'm waiting for Daughter to leave so that I can go to the gym.  I imagine it will be filled with teens and young adults who are off of school.  I didn't get around to putting up Christmas lights yesterday, so I might do that today, before the gym.  The gym keeps getting pushed off, but it will get done.

After 3 days off from weights, I was able to actually go up in the amount of weight I was using.  I mentioned this to Husband at lunch, and it ended up going in a very weird direction.  IDK, he has always said that I don't lift weights correctly. He is probably right. On the other hand, he's not lifting, pulling, or pushing with inflammation, soreness, a bum back, etc.  Also, he doesn't have to lift/pull/push with hormone influctions which I think DO make a significant difference to ME and my body at times.  Well, when one accomplishes something, the last thing one wants to hear is, That's because you're not doing it right. 

Oh well, I can't let myself be distracted with things like that.  I'm not following anyone's plan. I do what I do because:

  • It's what I want to do.
  • I can do it.
  • I enjoy doing it.

Right now, I have to start focusing on calories more than anything else.  Mindfulness, optimal eating, remaining calm.

Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 11/26/2021:
You are so right.....you have to do what works for you.......Be proud of what you are accomplishing......rather or not hubby wants to admit it.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/27/2021:
In total 100% agreement with Bear's comment and your feelings on the issue of lifting weights. pay no mind to hubby's comment. i also do not do things perfectly when it comes to my own lifting and pushups. and it really hasn't affected me badly. i do what i do and i'm happy. just do you; i wouldn't concern yourself with being perfect in form...really i wouldn't!

did you end up doing more bike or gym? i ended up having an off day, very much on the couch with a little break when i went out on a short walk to the supermarket. a rest day over here but today is back into reality a little more!

Donkey on 11/27/2021:
I went to the gym and did heavier weights on my legs. Either a hamstring or a gluteal muscle started to complain about having to exert itself (LOL), so later on at home, I *did* ride the bike, just to keep the muscle from tightening up too much.

I believe that because of that easier bike ride in the evening, I was able to avoid any lingering tightness on my right side/ham/glute/back/hip. It's that darn right side that is so vulnerable.

It's actually a great thing that Husband made that remark because I *am* challenging myself at the gym more. At home, the weights will be lighter because I'm limited on the equipment that I have. Plus lifting free weights doesn't have the same "safety" mechanisms that a machine has. Free weights are still great though as they challenge the muscles in a different way.

I'm quite fortunate to have my little gym at home! :-)

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Donkey - Thursday Nov 25, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 134.0

Happy Thanksgiving!!!  And to readers outside of the U.S. - Happy Thursday!!!

So I'll start with the "fun" part first.  Turns out, we lost electricity at work yesterday, from 9:28am - 1:09pm.  So  no computer, no emails, no calls, no internet, no heat.  (Thank goodness we could still flush the toilets.)  It was mostly myself, Mistakes Girl, and Nice Lady (until she bailed out to run errands and have lunch out with Associate Attorney - nobody else invited, but that's how those 2 roll). 

Because there was nothing to be done, I decided around 10:30am, to bring down the office Christmas tree and decorate it.  It wasn't a great job, but it's up, fully lit (had to replace a string of lights), and some ornaments.  I didn't use all of the ornaments, because all while I'm doing this, I'm thinking that I will be the one who has to put everything away in January.  Also, the tree was very dusty from being in the attic, which really irritates my throat and feels gross on my hands.  But I think the Boss will be pleased and he knows that we had lost power, so he won't think that I was wasting company time putting up the tree.  

But no power meant no going home early, because I had 4 hours to do a day's work.  I was not that busy but Mistakes Girl was overwhelmingly busy.  I don't think ANYBODY checked Male Co-Worker's emails so he will have a LOT of work to come back to.  He won't be very happy about it.  I know I would feel overwhelmed to come back to a million emails.  Mistakes Girl said that she is reconsidering coming in on Friday. I feel/felt kind of bad for her, but I also feel annoyed, and I'm not sure why.  

Came home and ate too many carbs again, including half a big sugar cookie that was meant for Daughter.  The calories weren't worth it, and I confess that I ate it mostly out of emotional reasons.  Not good.  This needs to stop.  It's stopping me from achieving what I want to do.  I also don't feel physically good eating crappy food.

Then this morning, I looked at my exercise clothes and felt a wave of inertia (probably the kindest word for it) that I didn't really want to do weight training.  But weight training is what's bringing results!  After 3 days off of weights, I *know* I need to get back at it.  Son called last night, so I could take the barbell class, but I think I'll go into the gym a little later and just do my own thing on the machines.  There's a 5k at the gym at 8am, so I'm going to avoid any hub-bub about that and go around 9am.

I plan to do laundry today, but also relax.  There's 3 football games on and I need/want to start library book #2 today.  I've been so mentally wiped out at the end of the day this week, Monday and Tuesday, that I did no reading, no journaling.  Last night, I wrote a little in my gratitude journal, but that was about it.  Could not write any gratitudes on Monday and Tuesday - it was like my energy was gone, my brain feed had turned to a test pattern and then static.

So this weekend, I'm recharging, doing Donkey things that Donkey likes to do.  I'm also thinking of goals & guideposts I want to meet in December.  I might go to the gun range with Husband.  Definitely go to the gym.

But I am grateful, and very thankful for this holiday weekend.  We're having Italian beef sandwiches, green beans, roasted potato wedges and maybe sweet potato wedges too, apple pie, pumpkin pie (with whipped cream).  Oh now I know why Husband bought those slices of deli cheddar cheese - to go on his apple pie!  LOL!

Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 11/25/2021:
I'm glad to hear that you got the office tree up and the timing was perfect considering the outage. I think that I want to start a new book today as well.....I think for me at least I'm over making plans for things I don't want to do...and then agonizing over it.....life goes on either way and I'm realizing that I lost my happiness a while back.....and I want that back.....

Donkey on 11/25/2021:
I agree - I think it was perfect! And I am hoping - laughs weakly - having some decorations will help cheer everyone up. I have little tiny ornaments hanging off the side of my desk, and I hung some garland over the washroom door that is next to my desk. (Oh don't even get me started about having to sit next to the john.) I also brought out some very ugly Santa doll-statues and put them out by the front table.

Re: things I don't want to do. Sometimes, having a list helps, because it is very satisfying to be able to cross off items as they do get done. I find having a visual-tactical tool, like a list, to be helpful.

I don't dislike weight training, and I LOVE the results. I know in my heart that it's just inertia that I'm battling. Of course, then I have that wistful feeling that I wish I were just naturally thin. But then, there are skinny gals who wish they were built and have to put in the work as well.

I think I've done really well to keep out of exhibiting unhappiness or crabbiness lately - more so at work, where I have to put up a facade. Lately, I don't always genuinely feel gratitude -- oh yeah, sometimes I have to dig deep, but it's there.

happy-1 on 11/25/2021:
Why is it that everyone else gets to leave or slack off but you? Are you hourly?

Donkey on 11/25/2021:
Yes, I am hourly, as are all of the assistants. Male Co-Worker gets 5 weeks of vacation a year, though, and because of COVID and other health issues, he hasn't been able to take as much time off as he usually does.

(Oh believe me, summer leaves a bitter taste in my mouth, as he takes a lot of time off when we're at our busiest. But so does Mistakes Girl. She just takes time off though. It doesn't matter to her whether she gets paid for it or not.)

New Gal doesn't work Wednesdays. That's just her schedule. Nice Lady works for Associate Attorney (he pays her directly), so she can do whatever she wants. She is not paid by the firm. When Associate Attorney signed on with our firm, it was supposed to be only him, so you can imagine how surprised (and dismayed) we all were when she came long with him.

happy-1 on 11/25/2021:
And good for you for taking time to recharge. Chronic stress without relief leads to long term health issues.

Donkey on 11/26/2021:
True! I hadn't considered the stress/health aspect of it. I think that had we traveled, it really would have just wiped me out, which is NOT what I need right now.

happy-1 on 11/25/2021:
And happy thanksgiving!

Donkey on 11/25/2021:
Thank you!!!!

Horn_of_plenty on 11/25/2021:
I was reading a comment you made to maria about not being a people person. Neither am I. I soo like to do my own thing too. You def aren't alone in liking to do your own thing!

Donkey on 11/26/2021:
IDK this year, it was especially appreciated to have a quiet calm holiday of rest. This was NOT the year to be with my brother, his 5 kids, my sister and BIL, my mom, and an Air Force drop-in or 2 that my brother sometimes hosts. No, not this year.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/25/2021:
We had a skeleton crew by 1:30pm yesterday and i think everyone went home by 2:30...hope you didn't stay too late yesterday. it's def nice to break early...so it's not just a rush and no break until Thanksgiving is over!...especially for those who have kids and/or are cooking!

Donkey on 11/25/2021:
I left at 5p and so did Mistakes Girl. We left Associate Attorney behind, making calls for clients who can't answer the phone during work hours.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/25/2021:
ohhh i'm so glad you brought down the tree!

haha, so mistakes girl doesn't want to come on Friday now? soon, if she stays pregnant,etc, she'll be gone. how bad can you feel for her then!? haha

i confess to feeling quite emotional today with my eating...but i stopped it and did what i could to hold off until later. def felt a feeling of emotional eating - of how it used to feel and why i'd reach for food to calm me...but didn't actually do it. i'm thankful i have so many options to turn to so i do not have to overeat much if at all...

i'm really sorry you worked late. that's quite a feat to work so late on thanksgiving. remember to take care of yourself. i'm sure you also ate due to being tired / after a long day of work, etc. if you had maybe given yourself more time to yourself between work and coming home for an emotional relax time, perhaps the cookie wouldn't have been eaten. but that being said, it's good to fit in cookies and candies also, and see how you can incorporate them so they are actual parts of your diet so you do not ever have to feel that they got you off track (thank gosh to SMALL sized treats!)

Donkey on 11/26/2021:
I looked up the cookie calories afterwards, and it was about 250 calories, so not the end of the world -- a regular dessert. It's just not compatible with what I want to do right now. It was just disappointing because the cookie was not that good.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/25/2021:
lol hubby puts cheese on pie!? what!?

also, we aren't having turkey either. brisket (prob similar $$$). not many in my family like turkey, although i do! but brisket is good too.

your meal sounds great. i'm also recharging this weekend between solo activities and also mixing in some family/friends a little bit nothing major.

feels good to be on my own doing my own thing but also a little balance with friends....

your green beans sound great are they the canned ones?

i was reading someone cooks the canned ones with a little butter, salt, pepper.....i'm going to try that later this week/weekend! :) maybe tomorrow.

Donkey on 11/26/2021:
The green beans were fresh. Husband boiled them but not like bubbling boiling, just had them steeping in warm/hot water until they were tender to eat.

He wants to you know your recipe for the fried green beans.

PS I don't really care for canned green beans.

Donkey on 11/26/2021:
PPS Cheddar cheese on apple pie is a thing. I kid you not. Cray-cray if you ask me, but others do it.

happy-1 on 11/26/2021:
I feel like with your work ethic, a certificate in social work and you would make a killimg as a geriatric care manager, $159/hr

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Donkey - Wednesday Nov 24, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 134.0

I'm trying hard to keep up here but I'm not always able to comment as much as I would like to.  Please know that I do read entries at work on my phone, but cannot login.

My stomach issue seemed to resolve itself by late afternoon, but dinner was TOO MANY CARBS.  (Yes, I'm shouting - at myself.)  Mainly in the form of roasted potato slices (so that they came out like fat french fries, sort of, with skins).  Also, had a gluten free cupcake after dinner, but I'm done with those.  The last 3 are for Daughter.  Out of 12, I had 5 over the course of 3 days.  Won't reach any goals by doing that, will I?  NO.

No weights this morning, either, which is OK.  If I make it to the gym tomorrow, this will have given me 3 days off, which was needed and perfect.  I was pleased to see that the barbell class at the gym IS being offered Thursday morning, BUT Son plans on calling around that time, so I won't be able to take the class.  That's OK too - just not meant to be.  I'd much rather talk to Son.  The gym is open 4am - 12p noon, so there's time for me to get there and do my thing, if I am motivated enough to do so.

We're working with a skeleton crew today.  Boss is out, Male Co-Worker is out.  New Gal doesn't work on Wednesdays.  New Guy and Associate Attorney are at closings for the morning, at least.  I know that Mistakes Girl is REALLY busy today with tasks, so my goal is to answer the phones as much as possible. Also, if I have nothing to do - ha ha ha - I may bring down the Christmas tree at work.  Big maybe, but I'm keeping an open mind about it.


Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 11/24/2021:

Maria7 on 11/24/2021:
Yes!!! Do the tree!!!

Jacky82020 on 11/24/2021:
Sounds like another hectic work week. But a long weekend coming up. Donkey needs some R&R.

bearcountrygg on 11/24/2021:
Getting paid for putting up a tree sounds like a winner. Happy to hear that your son will be calling.

happy-1 on 11/24/2021:
I think everyone on here goes through an ostrich period where they post just to keep themselves going and stop commenting for a bit. What, just me?

happy-1 on 11/24/2021:
I think if you get things done, you deserve to go home early. Skip the tree.

happy-1 on 11/24/2021:
Unless it is paid work. Then do it. Everything wlse will be there Monday.

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Donkey - Tuesday Nov 23, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 134.0

Not a good start to the day....

Woke up naturally, ready to go and tackle the day --- at 12:18am.  Had the hardest time falling back asleep.  Finally got up at 1am to take a sinus pill and pain releaver for a headache and some sinus pain.  I also figured that these might help me fall back asleep, which it did, but it wasn't good sleep.  I kept feeling like I wasn't asleep, but obviously I was in some form of light sleep or something, because I was dreaming when alarm #1 went off, when the coffee maker was done brewing, and then when alarm #2 went off. 

So not only was I very tired, but my stomach does not feel right at all.  I'm still able to drink coffee, although it's not as appealing as usual.  I am eating breakfast, although the idea of eating wasn't really appealing.  If I didn't have to go to work, I would probably delay breakfast. I'll be taking a bag of mint tea with me to work to help calm my stomach.

Because I was unable to get up out of bed on time, I was running late on my exercise schedule, so no weights today.  That's OK because I am kind of planning on going to the gym on Thursday and Friday.  So today and tomorrow might be light but long bike rides only, with walks at lunchtime.  Today's walk may be very light, as Mistakes Girl and I have plans to go to a park and place a statue that I gave her by a tree that was planted to honor the baby she lost.

Which brings me to work, which was a total disaster yesterday.  I had zero motivation to work, so I spent most of my day - I kid you not - clearing out memory storage in my computer, so that it will run more efficiently.  I was moving and deleting emails from 2012-2018 for the majority of the day.  This process kept crashing my computer, so I was constantly rebooting.  Mind-numbing time-wasting....

Male Co-Worker was NOT having a good day.  "There are no happy days here."  I didn't quite register that he's leaving for holiday on Wednesday, so today is his last day this week. We'll be short-staffed tomorrow (Wednesday), which means that those of us behind will have to work harder, although with the Boss being out, maybe not. 

But the REALLY BIG news is that Mistakes Girl is pregnant again - due in July! - and so she will be leaving us soon.  She has an ultrasound next week, after which, if everything is OK, she will make her announcement.  So right now, I'm the only one at work who knows.  My mouth is zipped <<<too bad it can't be zipped when it comes to eating!  Will this change my own work plans?  I'm not sure. It shouldn't.  Long-term I'm 99% positive it won't.  I would imagine that she won't be with us past March.  I'd be surprised if she lasts all of February.

Anyway, right now, I just have to get through today with a queasy stomach and fatigue.  Oh boy I hope to go to bed early tonight, for sure!

Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 11/23/2021:
Hate it when I wake up in the middle of the night & can’t fall asleep easily. If it goes on too long, I turn on the light & Tweet.

I never could eat first thing in the AM, so off to work on an empty stomach. Always had protein bars there & in my purse. Bought in bulk at Costco. Had to go light on the morning coffee because it goes right thru me & I couldn’t leave the classroom to take a pee.

You’ll have plenty of time to catch up on exercise what with the 4 day weekend.

Hope your coworker’s pregnancy goes well. Isn’t she the one who recently miscarried?

bearcountrygg on 11/23/2021:
Sounds like your morning started about as hard as mine did...Thank goodness for tylenol...It usually helps any bad mood I'm in.......So nice of you to honor your coworkers lost baby and happy to hear that she is expecting again......hope all goes well for her this time....Eating first thing in the morning isn't going to happen here either.....coffee great......food not

Donkey on 11/24/2021:
Food usually happens after 2 cups of coffee and about 1.5-2 hours of being awake (and after exercise).

I hope things go well for her too. I don't even want to think about the heartbreaking alternative.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/23/2021:
haha, we both finished our library books recently!

3-5 salted almonds is a nice idea instead of a cupcake. lower cals too.

1200 is a bit low for me, also...

i admit to doing mind-numbing work today ....eh, i was assigned to do it.

i hope your stomach got better do you know why it happened? did it have to do with taking sinus pills on empty stomach?

well, congrats to mistakes girl! she makes a lot of mistakes anyways...right!? lol...

have a good day tomorrow, it's "Friday!"

Donkey on 11/24/2021:
It could have been the pills on an empty stomach or something I ate. Also, I'm still fighting some kind of sinus infection, which I only sense in my ears and then sometimes with a sneeze or a "productive" cough here and there.

happy-1 on 11/23/2021:
Mistakes girl made the mistake of oversharing before she knows for sure… on brand!

Donkey on 11/24/2021:
LOL - true dat!

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Donkey - Monday Nov 22, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 134.0

I actually had a lot more to do yesterday than just "fun things" and ended up working harder than I had wanted.  Mostly this involved the last of the yardwork, breaking up fallen branches for the last yard waste pickup this week, and prepping some pots to plant rootings that have been growing at work.  Unlike my neighbors, though, I did not put up any Christmas lights.  This was probably the last "nicer weather" weekend.  Still, a little cold weather doesn't discourage me, and I might put up a couple of strings on Thanksgiving day.  It will give me something creative to do.  We don't put up a lot, but it's nice to have something.

Felt like I kicked butt at the gym, but no aches today, so maybe not.  Well, that's OK. I did all that I wanted to do and a little extra.  Finished library book #1.  Lights out at 9:30pm.

Oh but it was hard to get out of bed this morning, even with the extra sleep.   It didn't really hit me until I came off my bike that I have to go into work today.  It's a short week, though, and the Boss is going to be out of the office on Wednesday, which means not much will happen.  I imagine the phones getting very quiet around 3pm on Wednesday, and the emails coming to a halt.  That would be really nice, right?

I struggled last night with food.  Nobody seems to be eating the gluten-free cupcakes.  Sigh.  After tonight, they are going in the freezer, if nobody else is eating them.  I had one for dessert, which i OK.  But then, after my bike ride, I wanted another.  I stopped this by eating 3-5 salted almonds and then going upstairs.  The struggle is real.

I tried setting up the Lose It app for the 3-5 pound weight loss, and it had me at just about 1200 calories.  If I eat that little, it will hinder any gains I've made with weight training.  IDK, maybe I'm wrong about that.  I think that number is too low for me to function in a civilized manner.

Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 11/22/2021:
Do gluten free cupcakes taste different from the usual ones?

Maria7 on 11/22/2021:
You are working and also working out a lot and you have to decide if you will still be feeling strong on that amount of calories. I've done that before, the much lower calories, but it does seem to make me feel a little weaker (but I am retired and at home and not working an outside job, like you are, nor doing work-outs like you are..other than some walking). Holding steady is a good thing as in not gaining...but maybe you could aim for a slightly higher weight loss by your projected time and still be feeling strong with higher cals. Have you considered this? Just a suggestion....

Jacky82020 on 11/22/2021:
I’ll have to check out that app. I did see on one calculator I should weigh 100-127 for my rather short stature. 5’1” Always at the low end many moons ago.

Bet you’re looking forward to the long weekend!

coffee&calories on 11/22/2021:
Freezing desserts always works very well for me. Back on Nov 1 they had these cakes at the store that were 50 off even though they were fresh, because they were made the day before for Halloween. Of course I had to get one LOL but I cut it up while it was fresh and froze it into slices. It literally tastes fresh when it defrosts! The bonus being, I completely forget about things in the freezer and try to pawn it off on my husband to eat when I do remember hehe

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Donkey - Sunday Nov 21, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 134.0

Good morning!  What a wonderful thought I had this morning that I have only good things to do today:  fill up my birdfeeders, gym, read (& hopefully finish) my 1st library book, watch football.  Maybe some online shopping -- not the actual shopping, just sending links to Husband. 

Last night was different. I spent time with Daugher more than I have in the last 2 months put together I think!  We went and picked up poke bowls for dinner, and then after eating at home, she and I went to Target to see if they had some products that she can't find at her Walmart.  I also picked up some things that we either needed right away or that I can't find at other stores. 

Started working on Christmas gifts, which is HUGE for me, because shopping tends to create a lot of anxiety for me (which is why I'm mainly sending links to Husband, so that he can do the actual buying, which he enjoys doing).

I've been thinking about what's ahead for December.  There are 3 things I want to accomplish:

  1. Drop 3-5 pounds for Doctor's appointment on 12/13.  With 3 weeks to go, this is doable, although Thanksgiving puts a kink in it.
  2. Continue to build muscle - starting to see real gains in my arms and shoulders - BUT also
  3. Take a rest, which I'm not sure I know what that means any more.

These goals are not necessarily compatable, so I will need to prioritize.  Ugh, I just realized that I'm more uptight about this doctor's appointment than I thought I was.  I don't need that kind of additional stress in my life right now, in addition to everything else (meaning "work" because we're so freakin' busy).  OK, I'm going to re-evaluate #1, especially since cutting calories usually makes me grumpier than usual, and nobody needs a grumpy Donkey in the office or at home, either.  Hmm...

Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 11/21/2021:
Happy to see you got to spend some time with you daughter......You are right.....it's a tough time to lose weight with so many temptations and what is really worse.......not losing the weight or being stressed...( which may show up in blood pressure.)

Jacky82020 on 11/21/2021:
Terrific goals! You can do it!

Shopping stressing me out too. That’s why I’m very big on gift cards. Never met a person yet who doesn’t love them.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/21/2021:
oh, i didn't know you get sleep scores. do you think these are reliable?

I also try to have a few "helpful low cal options" at work...instant decaf coffee for when i want more warmth and liquid that isn't water, also the sugar free gum, small treats that are portioned; of course my stevia to add to my coffees; oh and my almond milk that i use bc it's so low cal and i'm used to it so rarely reach for milk at work.

per yesterday's entry, nice job maintaining. maintaining is GOOD because you are at least stable. i find maintenance to have always felt like a breath of fresh air for myself. a relief.

I hardly ever have issues with sleep on the weekend, sorry yours wasn't good last night but i'm surely thinking it will be better tonight. that's how it usually goes anyways!

it's nice to hear you will be starting a new book soon. me too. I am eager to finish this current one and see what i can find as my next library e-book. i think i will need a novel / biography mix. and i think it may need to be on personal strength during tough times. i like those. i guess they are motivating?

The water aerobics class sounds great. i would totally do it too. i agree it would be great for you, too. thanks for reminding me to see if i have an option like that for future on the weekends at the semi-local ymca pool. there's quite a bit of traffic driving there, but it's pretty local so it could work out. i think most of the classes were weekday mornings in the past...but boy it might be something nice for, say, wintertime weekends to do...i see why it could be hard for hubby, but,with you there it shouldn't be.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/21/2021:
ohhh nice...you have poke by you! it's actually not that popular by me, like, I really only know of 1 right now in the 5mi radius around where i live...but i am prob not aware of others! good for you, poke, so healthy. i find they sometimes add quite a lot of fish, so i sometimes try to eat most but save some of the fish for the next day to enjoy again..

For your goal on losing weight, I would recommend doing what you please for thanksgiving, but on the other days just going back on your plan. you can have a treat, but a treat and not like a treat all day long at every meal....lol. spread them out. if you want pie for example, on the weekend, perhaps have it as a later breakfast with your coffee? like, try to enjoy the things but try not to double up..but on thanksgiving, enjoy your work. if you cannot enjoy it fully, enjoy it fully on Friday after a night's rest if you plan to be doing a lot of cooking on thanksgiving?

i have never had to cook much for a holiday...and still not. i'm grateful for that, LOL....but it sure must be a good feeling to prepare a holiday meal. :)

Re taking a rest, choose a week that you want to take it easier. if you do not want to take the full week, at least take 4 days i'd say. usually the best time to rest is when you are already so busy with work/other items that it takes a lot out of you to exercise too...you can also choose if what you want is to take a resst from particular item...for me, it's weights that i always take a little rest from here and there. i recommend the 4 days or a week for them. you won't really lose much...and it can help entice you to get back into them after the break. if you really want rest, you can take the break from them over the long weekend of thanksgiving. i would have planned that also (if i needed it).

with the dr appt, perhaps set the goal to lose 1-2 lbs. you can decrease the goal if it registers better with less stress. it's YOU choosing these goals and like you say, it's best to get them somewhat compatible. so you found your own answer..

Maria7 on 11/21/2021:
That is sweet that you got to spend some time with your Daughter shopping. My Daughter and I went shopping last Saturday and enjoyed ourselves, too. I'm with you on dropping 3-5 pounds within the next couple weeks! I want to, also!

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Donkey - Saturday Nov 20, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 134.0

 Good morning to everyone except my bathroom scale (LOL).  I guess I'm doing a good job of maintaining between 132-134, so there's that.  But obviously, I am not doing enough on the eating part of it to lose weight.  I am thinking about starting to track calories & macros on the app after this coming up week. I don't plan to go off the deep end with Thanksgiving, but we will be having 2 kinds of pie, and I will probably have a small-ish slice through through the weekend.  Then the rest of it gets frozen.

I did not sleep well at all last night.  I met my goal and turned off the light at 9:32pm. I was watching an old Perry Mason episode, nodding off asleep.  I could hardly finish the episode.  Turned off the lights, set up the rain sound on Alexa, and laid down to sleep.  Could not drop off.  In fact, I started feeling MORE awake than when I was watching TV!  Finally turned off Alexa and turned on the box fan, and was eventually able to fall asleep maybe 10-15 mintues after that.  I know it was after 10pm because my phone updated itself at 10pm (forgot I had scheduled this - bad timing).  I think subconsciously, I was worried about losing the sleep sound through Alexa that I couldn't drop off.  Ugh...

So I got a later start this morning, but that's OK.  Nothing unusual planmed for today, except extra loads of laundry.  I'm still trying to chip away at my 1st library book, so that I can start the 2nd library book.  IDK, I'm thinking about maybe doing some YouTube yoga, but that's always a hassle to set up.  I don't know if I have the patience for that today.  Maybe tomorrow.  Actually, I'm finding myself not having a lot of patience for anything this morning.  Husband is grating on my nerves, Baby Kitty is driving my crazy, my hands hurt, blah blah blah.  I know that this is fatigue causing this.  How can I be annoyed at a kitty who wants to cuddle?

So not today, but perhaps some Saturday in the near future, after Thanksgiving, I noticed that the gym has an Aqua class that is good for people with joint problems.  A class like this has been highly recommended for Husband, because of the AS, but it's really hard for him to do it, for many reasons, which I understand completely.  It's hard enough to go to a strange class, but in your bathing suit when you're out of shape?  And then to a class full of older ladies when you're the only guy?  That's really hard for Husband to do.  I get that.

But I proposed doing this together - even though it's not my thing - and he seemed really open to it. At least we're both open to trying it.  If he likes it, they offer a class on Thursday mornings, that he could do on his own.  (Of course, I do not ever expect him to do that - I would be 100% surprised if he did.)  But I'm kind of glad I realized that this is yet another active thing we can do together.

Daughter took today off, to celebrate boyfriend's birthday, but I guess that's not happening.  So I'm not sure if she will want to do something today or if she will be doing her own thing, or if she will go into work.

My goodness if Husband doesn't stop coughing I'm going to make him stop. (Just kidding - it's just drivin' me NUTS right now)

Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 11/20/2021:
It is a tough time to deal with food....in our cold climates not only do we have to deal with the new seasonal foods...but the cold I think makes us look for warmer foods...things that shout comfy and cozy..... I hope you guys can take advantage of the aqua class....

Donkey on 11/21/2021:
I'm not a big swimmer, but Husband is/was back in the day. So attending the aqua class would be a big push for me. It's NOT a swimming class, but I mean, just getting into the water - blah, not my thing, really - but it's good to push one's boundaries out of the comfort zone from time to time.

And I would love to make friends with older ladies!

Donkey on 11/21/2021:
Oh yes, you know what I'm talking about with the cold weather eating. When my folks lived in Wisconsin, and I visited, I could see why it's so easy to eat a lot of starchy foods, and then sit by the fireplace watching TV or reading. I had to really push myself to be active, to get outside and brave the cold --- which was delightful, actually, once I got my butt outside. So beautiful and peaceful in the woods, and I had the right coat & gear to handle the cold. I'm just saying it's much easier to just sit in a chair and do nothing.

There are a lot of overweight folks in northern Wisconsin.

Jacky82020 on 11/20/2021:
The aqua class sounds like a great idea! Didn’t realize mostly ladies attend. My friend used to attend one. It had some younger disabled guys & some fat teen boys. A few overweight older guys. She had concerns about her own appearance initially, but quickly got over it.

Didn’t you mention your husband has NAFLD? Get a few free email medical journals. Surprised to hear 25% of ppl have that. Didn’t know it was so common. Seems to be lifestyle & reversible for most, but the article focused on staging & became too complex, so I went on to another one.

Donkey on 11/21/2021:
Yes, Husband has NAFLD in the early stages. I did not think it was reversible, but only stoppable. Thank goodness he's not one for drinking alcohol much - rare special occasions - or that would be even more taxing on his liver.

I just realized that I think Husband doesn't drink much because I've stopped drinking alcohol for the most part too. There's no wine bottle at dinner, so he's not tempted. Same for beer - we're not "bar" people. Sometimes he will get a beer if we eat out, but with COVID, that's not very often.

Brett on 11/20/2021:
I like those old Perry Mason reruns too. All the Perry Mason moments.

Donkey on 11/21/2021:
I keep telling my Boss that Perry took his staff on a cruise.

What I want to know is why is Della still at the office at 7pm taking phone calls?

happy-1 on 11/20/2021:
Omg I miss pools. Good idea for the two of you to go together. If you need more of a workout, you can use empty water bottles or milk jugs for weight. There are aqua bells but they are $$.

Annoying kitty, yoga a hassle? Sounds like you need a complete rest day.

Donkey on 11/21/2021:
I need a complete rest day. I just don't seem to be able to allow myself this.

happy-1 on 11/20/2021:
Also, I can’t sleep with rain sounds either. I need an actual fan. I keep a usb camping one in my suitcase for travel. I did setup Alexa to play rain sounds for transitions… everytime I need to get up and do something that requires a lot of energy to change tasks, Alexa plays a chime, tells me what I need to prepare to do, then plays rain sounds to destress for 5 minutes. Then the church bell and what I need to do again. If I don’t move, the cat stabs me.

Donkey on 11/21/2021:
The fan is the BEST. And not the "fan" noise on Alexa - an actual fan. Thunderstorms on Alexa works 2nd best. "Rain" as a last resort.

For relaxing, though, I find "Tibetan singing bowls" to be the best. I can't say just "singing bowls" though or I get spa music in the background.

Jacky82020 on 11/21/2021:
Yes, it’s reversible. I just googled & got many hits saying so. Could mean only the more common early stages are reversible by lifestyle changes. I’m seeing it doesn’t progress for the average person.

I was surprised that it’s at 25%. Reminds me of a friend in my small Twitter DM group. She said they saw a pituitary tumor on a MRI. Then another person said they had one too. Turns out 25% do, it’s very common, Most are harmless. But it did sound scary at first & this woman was carrying on like she had a fatal brain tumor. It’s still there & nothing’s happening. Most ppl don’t even know they have one, unless imaging is done for some other reason. Can’t quite remember, but think they extract them from the nose.

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Donkey - Friday Nov 19, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 133.5

Happy Friday!  I am so ready for this weekend. 

This week has - AGAIN - been insanely busy.  And it seems as though I have started to take on the duties of dealing with problems that occur after the files have closed.  I do not want this job.  It used to be Nice Lady, but she got fed up with Male Co-Worker and made a big stink about it.  So the Boss took it away from her, but now we have to deal with these problems and Male Co-Worker refuses to work on these.  Says he doesn't have time.  It was supposed to go to New Gal, but she's not savvy enough to work on these.  Also, she's so freaking busy opening up new contracts and answering the phones that she really doesn't have time for it either.  Don't even ask Mistakes Girl, who is at 110% from the minute she sits down to work. 

I woke up early on my own, but I just could not get out of bed.  I drifted in and out, and finally got out of bed after alarm #2 went off at 5:15am.  I didn't do everything I wanted to do with weights last night - just tired, gave up after barbell squats - so I did a couple of more lower body exercises this morning (dumbbell lunges & sumo dumbbell squats).

Eating was OK I think. Having baby carrots at work for the afternoon anxiety eating has helped, but I'm not entirely convinced I'm pulling it in as much as I need to. Tomorrow's weigh-in will tell me what I need to do.

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -1.5 lbs to go!

Maria7 on 11/19/2021:
Wow, sound like Y'all are really busy at work. Remember to take some breathers outside and get some fresh air. Take care of yourself. Hope you have a good day. Baby carrots is a really good idea. I need to get some, too.

Donkey on 11/20/2021:
THIS is what I need to do. You know what I really miss are those 5 minute vesper meditation prayer time-outs that I tried to do in September. THAT was so helpful. Can't really afford to step away from the phones and leave my co-workers to handle all of that.

And Heaven help everyone in my office when my midday walk gets delayed. Learned that lesson the hard way yesterday. Definitely need to take a walk around noon.

Jacky82020 on 11/19/2021:
Listen to Maria!

Bet you’re looking forward to a 4 day weekend!

Donkey on 11/20/2021:
Definitely - YOU KNOW IT!!!

bearcountrygg on 11/19/2021:
Office politics.....not governmental but internal as in who can get the boss to let them get away with "stuff".......Male coworker sounds like a real winner......and every office has one or more.....

Donkey on 11/20/2021:
Oh this is 100% with Male Co-Worker. He and the Boss go WAY back, like 20+ years. That is why he gets away with this stuff.

happy-1 on 11/19/2021:
Breathe. You will get through it inch b inch. You can only do what you can do in a day.

Donkey on 11/20/2021:
Absolutely! I need to really try to take those 5 minute meditation breaks. You know what has helped my mood a bit is visualizing myself doing yoga moves on my drive to work. Hey, if it works, I'll use it! :-)

Horn_of_plenty on 11/19/2021:
haha. regarding your wednesday saying you couldn't log on further or read comments, i can relate. Never in my life has my schedule been so frustrating. anyways, i can relate.

remember, with that wednesday dinner, there's really no "bad" and "good" foods if portioned. also, maybe my mind isn't right, but, i do not think all "meals" need to be meals. like, look at my weird dinners - and, no, i am not recommending those recent dinners.

what i'm saying is, we live in the land of plenty and i'm not sure that meals always need to be so huge/filling/perfect/nutritional/etc etc.

if my comment is too much, please tell me. I am having some emotional issues this week and can relate to yours.

i am left feeling very sad tonight as I write this. not sad like i want to end my life or anyhting like that. sad at where i'm at...

today, the owner of the company visited my trailer where i work...and i was overly nervous the entire time. i almost couldn't fully focus on my work. i didn't want to even do one thing to have another bad situation with him again. i guess a little PTSD.

Donkey on 11/20/2021:
I know what you are saying about meals being "proper" or "not proper". That is one reason why I enjoy reading your menus, because you follow your cravings (sometimes, of course) and don't always have a structured meal.

I think that approach is mostly applicable to my lunches, since that is the one meal I eat on my own. Breakfast is always the same, although it does change. But after it changes, then I eat that for a million times, before I change it, and so on.

Dinner is usually a structured meal, because Husband prepares it. He's retired/disabled and he also enjoys cooking. However, and more so lately, when his pain becomes difficult to manage, it's an agreement that we can always have sandwiches and leftovers, with no objection.

I wonder if we will get to the point where he will be in bed, either resting or sleeping, to manage pain, and I'll be on my own for dinners again. Hmm...

Horn_of_plenty on 11/19/2021:
maybe it doesn't help i'm watching the Turpin 20/20 report tonight on tv about those poor kids in that family where the parents were setnenced to life.

Donkey on 11/20/2021:
I'm commenting here on your sadness, so that my comment is separate. LOL, no it probably doesn't help your mood much to watch difficult TV. Or maybe it helps you realize how fortunate you are where you're at.

I think you hit it on the head though with the post-traumatic stress from the incident with the Owner. That anxiousness, along with end-of-the-week fatigue, could definitely lead to feelings of sadness.

Hopefully you feel better today and enjoy your amazing volunteering experience!

Horn_of_plenty on 11/19/2021:
when my sleep is interrupted, i also tend to have a very hard time getting up. today, and yesterday, it was a little easier to get up as i've been sleeping more hours per night this week! sleep definitely helps a person get up once they can actually sleep as much as they need, HA HA HA....

the one thing good about being busy at work is that the day FLIES by. days go pretty fast where i work; the weeks generally go fast too; and the months are flying like hot cakes. it is almost scary how fast the pace is...not my job particularly, but the energy of working in a very large pieced together trailers (feels like an office, not a trailer at all), and just people coming in and out all day, meetings, fast pace. for sure, this is a good thing, because there's always a feeling of progression and it always feels like the holiday(s) are right around the corner, whatever holiday or long weekend it may be.

Donkey on 11/20/2021:
You're right about time flying by. I would agree that it's better to busy than not busy, but if we could just be a little less busy, so that it's manageable.

Seriously, I find myself in the past 2 weeks just feeling so wiped out by 3pm. Physically AND mentally. My hands start to hurt from typing. I can't seem to trust my decision making processes. I start feeling binge-y and want to stress-eat.

2 weeks ago, I had very good sleep scores. My scores are still good (B+) but definitely not the stronger scores I was getting. So I think that makes a difference too.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/19/2021:
about the issues after the files have closed...and you not wanting the job...

well, i can only give advice about something similar that happened at my job, but not about mistakes. just about "extra work" that involved typing a lot of labels. the youngest lady, 24, was saying "how long is this work going to take....I have my own work to do!" she wasn't yelling, but was really asking why she had to do the work and how will she get her work done..

...so i mentioned to her, "this is your work too." I had been assigned that work too, and, my schedule is very different than the 24yo girl. she does, i think, more rudimentary tasks. a lot more repetitive than mine. and mine are repetitive too...but they are get changed up week to week. some of her tasks are completely ongoing. very paperwork/administrative. not fun; very boring. anyways, the point is, if there is work to do, it has to be done...by someone...

i am not sure if the work to be done is yours or not. i would not know that answer. maybe in a different firm, the administrator (boss or second up) would assign it.

seems in your firm, tasks and who is handling them is not laid out or spelled out.

Donkey on 11/20/2021:
You're right - it is my job if everyone else is too busy to work on it. However, I did tell my boss that I felt it was a mistake to take these tasks away from Nice Lady. But I agreed with him when he explained why that happened, so no conflict there.

I realize that with post-closing issues, I'm OK with working on them BUT I can't be expected to drop everything and work on them NOW, because I'm working on managing my current files. So I think if I remember that, it will help me remain calm. And if someone wants it done NOW and I'm busy that day, then someone else will have to do it.

Horn_of_plenty on 11/20/2021:
nice job being prepared with the carrots for your afternoon at work. that's what it is about. little things are better than nothing.

Donkey on 11/20/2021:
Really makes a huge difference. Celery sticks also work for this. If I don't have them available, I *TRY* to remember that I have sugar-free mint gum, sugar-free mint candy, diet Coke, coffee --- all of these are better than stress-eating.

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