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Donkey - Tuesday Jul 13, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 136.0

Oh my goodness!!!  After yesterday's "rest day", I can tell you all how important rest is for a body, especially as we get older.  I did do my morning bike ride - to loosen up my hips and back - and I did do my push-ups, but after that, it was minimal steps.  I did not take a lunchtime walk, but dropped off cans at the cat shelter, and then went shopping for some sugar-free candies at a special store.  I park FAR away and walk up to the store, but that was the extent of the lunchtime walking.

When I did yoga at night, I realized just how much I missed stretching out and relaxing.  It's an hour of de-stressing that I really need in my life.  I won't have class next week, because of the time crunch (Mistakes Girl will be on vacation, and I'm already planning on staying later most days).

I did notice, during yoga, that I'm starting to see and FEEL results from the hard work I've been putting in.  I felt like I had a little more "room" to move, and some of the static moves I was able to hold with not too much effort, so that I could focus on form and not just holding myself up.

 Needless to say, I feel GREAT this morning. I had a nice bike ride, shorter so that I could get in my awesome upper body weight training session!  I did extra this morning because I had time and energy, and I realized I might not feel this great after a full day at work. (Ha ha ha ha!)  I will be doing my push-ups after I log off from here.

I found myself becoming very frustrated with my Boss and his cognitive decline yesterday.  That is not who I am.  You see, I am 2 people:

  1. I'm a person who is not unkind, and while I may not be the most patient, I do empathize with people and their struggles.
  2. I am a person who works hard and wants to get the job done; anything that interferes with that causes me frustration, and my impatience flares up.

The positive #1 tends to get stomped on by the negative #2 -- she's a force to be reconded with.  I just get so consumed and overwhelmed by work that I lose sight of what's REALLY important. HELP!!!  What do I do???

Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 07/13/2021:
Sorry your Boss can be a jerk!

Sounds like you had a very productive day. Sure many more to come!

I see you lost 50 pds. How long did that take?

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
It took me about 6-7 months to lose 50 pounds. Then, several times, I've gone beyond that, only to gain it back up to the 130's. It was with the shutdown last year that I did some emotional eating, reacting to the uncertainty of COVID. Really ridiculous on my part, but there you go.

bearcountrygg on 07/13/2021:
I don't like interruptions when I am concentrating either and the older I get...the more they bother me. I don't know what to do about it either......I try to remind myself that I'm not doing brain surgery here yet....at the moment...it's irritating....my tolerance level is getting lower and lower.

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
Thank you - it's helpful to know that I am not the only one, and that you can relate to how I feel. I will try to keep the brain surgery perspective in mind. This is true, and a helpful tool -- it just all gets very lost in the whirlwind of work.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
you will be able to easily move up to 20# dumbbells. if you can do 3 sets of at least 12 reps, you should move up. especially if your form is very good and you aren't overcompensating somehow with wrong form. and i know you aren't bc 15# isn't very heavy. that's almost where i began when i started weightlifting, but maybe i started at 5/10# but i rememeber, sort of, that i quickly gained way and moved onto the 20# quite easily. i think anything after that took a lot more work.

the only way i am able to keep the chest flies doing at least 1 or 2 sets of 35# is almost always 3x per week exercise, with a couple 2x per week mixed in. the minute i lower that 2-3x a week intensity or take time off, i'm back to 30# and always have to work my way back up. and of course, besides all this, i have stood by my pushups..

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
I could probably do to move up to 20's. I'm going to try this out at the gym, and see how it goes. I can "borrow" theirs (at the gym) until I can purchase my own.

I just got some plate weights for my barbell, so dumbbells will have to wait.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
Re - the woman who lives in my building that works in my industry doing essentially what i do (assisting project managers) except she assists a main one and his small stuff and she's been there like 20yrs and just her so she has prob a lot of organized work and schedule. she has also had extremely early start times, i think she used to start at 6am and be out by 2-2:30. it's a diff company that's part of the same electrical union. I also think her commute is pretty good and that it may be that she works in the same borough as she lives. she just got really lucky that it all panned out for her. she's very nice. been married awhile and she's turning 45....but her son is only 5. she and her hubby decided on the child later on.

so this woman is pretty logical, nice, sweet and we catch up time to time.

i asked her what she thought about me taking time with all these new people and coming across as always taking time off. she totally just said that if i have time, to use it. to do my work and that life's too short to care about what they think and that i should do what i need to do...like i said, she's 45 and has worked a psoition like mine but even earlier hours and all through the pandemic and i am sure she's a great worker, for at least 20 years. but she said, if i have the time available, i should just use it.

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
Fundamentally, your neighbor is correct. And that's how it *should* be at our office, too, but it's not.

Male Co-Worker gets 5 weeks' vacation/sick time off , which he negotiated instead of getting raises, so he has a lot more time than I get. I'm not sure how Mistakes Girl is managing this time off... Everyone starts off with 2 weeks' time off in their bank. She's been off way more than that.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
next, i handed in my timesheet / emailed my timesheet to pissy patty early today instead of tomorrow since i will not be at work.

i had to ask the project executive which is the highest level boss in the trailer (and a nice man who is extremely up front and easy going with def giving the benefit of the doubt and trying to make sure everyone gets along, he's fair, humble...a good boss to have as of now)...so i told him i was going to send her my timesheet today since i will not be in tomororw and a joke was made that i was taking time...maybe it was me who said it...and how he's known me a short while but i'm already taking time...

fair and square he said to me, if you want to take time off, you take time off and do not worry. basically, he made it clear that i can take the time i need to now. i'm new and my workload really isn't huge right now. i'm flexible in what i do and my every task isn't laid out yet. i sometimes assist others, etc.

but the main point he made clear is that he doesn't really mind what i do as long as i am clear about the time i'm taking (and probably do not take time last minute but do it in a formal manner with a week or two heads up before a couple days off - is my guess) - and to not lose my professionalism in how i do things...

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
It's good that you had that conversation with your current boss. It sounds like he's quite reasonable about taking time off as long as it's done in a mannerly way. That's so nice.

And he's right - if you have the time to take off, it's your privilege to use it as you see fit. My boss seems to not realize this sometimes. Not with me, because I never take a lot of time off, but with others.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
i think my ability to take off is quite diff than yours. not everyone, btw, in my trailer can take off like i do.... some can especially us 3 female assistants, but the project executive and most Project managers haven't taken much more than 1-2 days just like me so far.

However, there's an engineeer and his assistant and both of them have already taken at least 3 days off each recently. also, in the time i've been in the trailer i think just about everyone has taken at least 1 day off in the past 1.5months.

it's a tough industry and many of us have long commutes and most of them have families. some have younger kids...

but for you, remember to be true to your own self. September is a nice time for a few days off. I will prob take your suggestion and do it in September too.

I am lucky in that i have a total of 15 vacation days and 5 sick days. I will not be trying to save them...first I will take care of my health and use them when I see fit. If I have leftover that i can be paid for, ok, but if i don't I will not be upset about it. (this company pays for all unused days annualy but it's not always worth it to save time off).

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
Yes, I see how your situation is different than mine. Not only the politics of taking time off, but also the dynamic of the work itself. If I take a day off, I am so far behind that it's twice as stressful just trying to figure out what I missed.

I get 2 weeks' off (80 hours), and this year, 1 week of that was used for COVID quarantine, when my daughter had it. Ours is just time off, regardless of if you are sick or vacationing. On the other hand, I think I'm the highest paid assistant on the team.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
With my old commute, i had more time to stretch. I would stretch waiting for the bus in the morning. I'd stretch waiting for the train in the subway. I'd walk more and everything. and i do notice my body is getting a bit tight and my back sometimes very inflexible while sitting at work. my point - yes, stretching and your yoga is wonderful for you.

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
I need to do more of it... it just seems to not happen.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
OH! the best thing about my time off:

Wednesday, the owners (they own like 49%) who bought my company (3 from Israel, one lives here), they are part of a larger company that my company is owned by, are coming tomorrow. being that my workload is iffy and the more people in the office, the louder, I am sad to miss seeing these men - but happy not to add to the chaos of the day (seriously).

Thursday, the owners (51%) of only my company, who inherited it from their father in the electrical industry and my company is still family-owned by them but they have sold around half to the Israeli larger company as i do not think the current NY owners have any family that can take it over after they get older (i don't think their kids will ever work in the electrical industry like they did after they inherited the company from their father)...

anyways. THURSDAY: the owners who i used to work next door to and for like 3 weeks during office renovation i had to work in the same office as ... and one of the two brothers who gave me a hard time (after knowing my dad and everything he still felt the need or desire to somehow treat me like a child and without any understanding), will be coming to the trailer. I will miss this visit. and for that, i know, i am thankful and i know it's a good thing.

So, i gotta say, these three days workout out GREAT.

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
Definitely a blessing in disguise! I love how you didn't even plan it this way, only to find out that you will be avoiding such unpleasantness - even the thought of it. That's great!

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
and no, i didn't know they were coming till after i planned the 3 days. i didn't plan it knowing there were upcoming visits...that'd be weird! LOL

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
See my comment above - HA HA HA HA! Kismet is in your favor :-)

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
OK. regarding your boss i have only this advice..

At my work, the project executive and 2 other men in particular have to deal with a woman (well all us women), who are honestly (all of us including myself) not as smart as they are.

they have to remain PATIENT. even when the youngest of us says things that they just want to probably tell her off about.

the two men in particular that i'm thinking of, have this ability to be very calm and explain things without any effort to anyone no matter their abilitiy and i'm so lucky in this way...that i'm working with pretty patient people.

What you need to do in my opinion is NOT EMPATHIZE with the boss. rather: yes, be kind. yes, be a listener. yes, do your work. yes, be patient.

but no, do not talk unnecessarily long with him or give advice or anything. do not feel bad he is a certain way or lacking.

only do your work and you may have to look beyond this job for a new job. i don't know.??

your boss deserves no empathy from you.

he has money. he has what he needs.

you take care of you. try more to play that proffessional role and "play the game" of leaving the empathy and those emotions more at the door.

you can talk here and to your hubby abuot these things.

and it's good you notice his decline as it's good to be observant wherever you are....

but you cannot let it influence your behavior or work as much as you want it to.

not sure if you can gather anything from this advice, but that's what i could think of now.

just to take care of you. there are other jobs. you can prob make more money just about ANYWHERE. perhaps really try to take a chance and work somewhere else close to home when the opportunity arises, IF it arises. obviously i haven't checked the job market for real estate paralegals in chicago suburbs.

i'm trying to say, don't lose your own focus over focusing on the boss.

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
YES - and others here have said the same thing. And it's not to say that we're not uncaring or not sympathetic, but at the end of the day, he's the Boss, this is a business, and I can be replaced quite easily.

I need to take care of me. Everything else is kind of out of my control. I MUST remember this, for my own sanity.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
I like Bear's advice re interruptions.

at my current workplace, if you reallly don't want to be interrupted, many have doors. they close the door. i can't do that. and i was give these lower cubicle walls while everyone else has walls almost as tall as the ceiling. hmmm. would be nice if you had those around your desk!!

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
Yep, which is why I really HATE that my desk is right out in the open. In fact, I'm also the receptionist for people who drop by to the office. It was so nice when our door was locked for COVID, and everyone had to make an appointment and stay downstairs in the conference room.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
sorry so many messages. finally had the time to sit and write!

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
I'm glad that you did -- your comments are very helpful and insightful. I gave you advice, based on what I know from my own situation, and now I understand more fully what you have to work with. I think workers should share their experiences more often, so that we know what others have and don't have.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2021:
* i made a mistake above in typing when i was talking about that woman in my building...i mean she's assisting a PM and his SMALL STAFF (not stuff!)

Donkey on 07/14/2021:
LOL ;-)

Donkey - Sunday Jul 11, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 136.0

Yesterday was a good day, but here are a few learning points:

  • I did not do my 2nd set of push-ups for missing Friday's push-ups, like I said I was going to do.  To be honest, I just forgot (again), but as I was doing the push-ups for today, I realized (or rationalized with myself) that Friday is gone, and I missed it.  So just gonna move on forward with what I have to do today, which is why I was doing push-ups early in the day, to get them done.
  • I went over my calories a little bit, but I also was very active.  I got in over 32,000 steps yesterday.  Anything over 30K is a very active day.  More activity requires more fuel.  So I'm not beating myself up over this, but just making an observation.
  • Having eaten a little more, and having a higher carb dinner than usual, though, I woke up not feeling hungry.  I was not desperate for breakfast, had breakfast at 9:35am, and I should be good until it's time for lunch.   

I am telling myself NOW that I do not want to have to lose this weight AGAIN.  As I get older, doing this again will be harder to do. I will never be a waife that I've tried to be in the past.  I've been given THIS body, and it's up to me to take care of it while I'm here on earth.

EVENING EDIT:  Went over calories again today.  I was doing OK until Husband decided to put bacon in everything we had for dinner.  Well... truth be told, I was hungry after the gym.  If I didn't want to go over calories, I should have cut back on my portions.  No worries - I will be back on track tomorrow with work.

My step-count isn't as high as Saturday's, but I am physically tired.  I had a fun time at the gym though.  I'm starting to see some progress.  I'm glad tomorrow is a rest day and yoga.  Last Monday, I did not really get my rest day, since yoga was canceled for the holiday weekend.

I am a licensed mortgage originator (loan officer), although I don't use it.  However, every year, we have to have 8 hours of continuing education.  I can save $$ by signing up for the "self study" course now.  The last time I did the "self-study" version, it took me 16 hours to complete an 8-hour course.  (Had to repeat several sections and took a longer time with the quizzes and such.)

I guess maybe Horn's studies are rubbing off on me, because I'm actually considering doing this.  I would do an hour each Saturday and Sunday until I've finished.  I really don't like the idea of taking ANY time off of my weekends to do anything relating to work, but it would be much cheaper.

I can do it this way or wait to pay a little more and sign up for the live webinar - which is 9 hours (because we get an hour for lunch), but then I'd have to take the day off of work, because it's during the week.

No matter which way I decide, it's all very dry material.  I guess I have to get through it, one way or the other - it just depends on how much I want to pay for it and how much time I want to devote to it.  Another classic example of how "time is money".


Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 07/11/2021:
Are those bike steps or walking steps? I’m been aiming for 30K too, but most are bike rotations. I really should find a daytime TV show I can watch & spend more time on the treadmill, but it’s so easy to read on this iPad. It bounces around too much on the treadmill.

You’re really doing terrific! Yay, Donkey!

Donkey on 07/11/2021:
Good point! Saturday's 32,000+ steps were a combo of bike, activity (yardwork and housework), and elliptical at the gym. I know what you mean - yes there's a difference between walking/running steps and those that come from a bike (or perhaps the elliptical) -- BUT I have found (for me) that once the step count - regardless of where it comes from - reaches 30,000 -- I'm TIRED!

bearcountrygg on 07/11/2021:
Wow...32,000 steps is amazing...I struggle to even get 10,000 and that's on a good day. I agree...losing it all over gain is not an option!!! I used to take that too lightly...never again.

Donkey on 07/11/2021:
See above my clarification to Jacky. I agree with her that there is a difference, until I get to a point and then it's all effort.

Donkey on 07/11/2021:
Let me also add that I could never ride my bike for hours on end. It starts to hurt my hips, legs and feet. So I break it up, with about an hour in the morning, and maybe 40 minutes at night.

Jacky82020 on 07/12/2021:
30K is challenging no matter how you do it!

Donkey on 07/13/2021:
YES!!! (at least for me)

horn_of_plenty on 07/12/2021:
i will write more but that's a hard decision re the coursework on the weekend or getting it all done in one shot.

honestly, i see getting it all done in one shot as better, but, you do not have a lot of vacation time if i remember. also, it would give you some "organized" time on the weekend which could easily help you with your weightloss / maintenance goals - and you'd still be home so you can eat/ snack what you want anytime.

Donkey on 07/13/2021:
I'm taking into consideration this comment, as well as your other comment below, regarding the CE class. I'm not sure how long the "deal" for the cheaper self-study class will last. But I am DEFINITELY taking your comments into consideration.

horn_of_plenty on 07/12/2021:
Oh love your thoughts and it def becomes harder to lose weight each time around. You have done well abs it’s all been maintenance and not really needing to lose over 10 lbs again so that is wonderful. Overall you have stuck to it. I have found that after maintaining a long time, I have been able to sometimes lower cals or learn to maintain a bit better and hit the lower weights at the end of the spectrum, as I have done this year. However, part of the weight loss can also be a constant change of routine where I haven’t settled into a comfort zone yet with work, etc which has always helped me in weight loss (bc you want to make a good impression….) and appetite is lost a little bc it’s all new work atmosphere etc .

When I’m at my computer I’ll answer the other questions it really is not much more to say bit I feel it’s a lot of words to type idk why . I’m lazy lately with it

Donkey on 07/13/2021:
Yes, I've GOT to do better with maintenance this time.

horn_of_plenty on 07/12/2021:
Honestly you have to decide if it’s worth many weekends of time studying. It may be better that way but it will be a long term thing taking 2-3 months or like a season.

horn_of_plenty on 07/12/2021:
Ok I’ll write answers here before I forget.

I do have only one dumbbell that is #40. I use it only one at a time per arm so that’s the reason I only have one. I use it solely for bicep curls and I stand at a posture that helps me curl. As well, I would have better range if I used a lower weight. Sometimes when I get weak, I do less curls bc I can’t get up to my usual reps and th. I take a lower weight dumbbell and follow up with more curls. This is always how I increase strength when I start to lose some - by doing some extra curls following the higher weight with lower and like also having an extra set.

For overhead chest press on my back on the bench, I like to use #35 dumbbells - I have a pair. I usually cannot do all three sets eith 12 reps and I sometimes need to do a set at #30 which I also have a pair. I also have around a 20-25 pair that is adjustable to any weight and it’s somewhere between the 20-25 and not exact bc like I said it’s adjustable but I always forget what it is. I use that when I’m getting weak especially abs after a heavy set that maybe I can only do 6 reps, I’ll quickly switch to it until fatigue and it helps me build myself up both in biceps and overhead press.

I only have one #40 Bc I haven’t felt like buying another as I continuously lose strength in the overhead press and continuously fall between either doing well with the #35 set or backing off and needing the #30 abs extra reps to get myself Back up to #35. I was thinking. To order one #45 for biceps again but I haven’t done it yet. I like the weights that are plastic coated abd non adjustable …the are also easier to hold. I should indulge for my bday in a #45 - for fun for biceps . Still prob not getting another #40 for a pair unless I stay much stronger on the shoulder press on my back …. I think I’ll answer your other questions re vacation tomorrow as I think I’m going to bed- I will answer when I have time off - I’m a bit tired out - nothing about you at all.

Donkey on 07/13/2021:
Now that I think about it, I think we had a very similar conversation, when I was considering buying heavier dumbbells. I specifically remember that you had mentioned the need for only 1 dumbbell of a heavier weight because of the types of exercises I would be doing.

So hopefully I remember what you have this time, so that I don't ask you again.

But 35# I'm really impressed. In fact, the heaviest I have is 15#. I should try the 20# at the gym, first, to see if I'm ready to purchase the next level.

Donkey - Saturday Jul 10, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 136.0

 I do not trust my scale - BUT right now, I need all the motivation I can get to keep going, so I'll take this number.  When I weighed in, stepping on the scale with my right foot first, I consistently got 136.0.  BUT when I stepped on the scale with my LEFT foot first, I got different numbers, that were not so rewarding (discouraging, actually).  Three times with the right foot showed 136, so that's what I'm going with.

It feels good to be a little lighter, not carrying around the extra bloat, clothes fit more comfortably, too.  But as I wrote earlier this week:  THIS IS HARD.  Firstly, it takes conscious effort:  food choices, portion control, etc.  Then, there's dealing with the other feelings:  some fatigue, some anxiety, a little sadness (especially at the end of the day).  If I were maintaining, I would have had some frozen banana after my evening bike ride, to help.  However, especially with weigh-in this morning, I refrained.  That is the difference between weight-loss behavior and maintenance behavior.  

Jacky has mentioned this, and I have heard this too, in other circles, that people who fast intermitently, claim that they actually experience more clarity and more energy.  I don't discount what others have experienced, but I don't get to that point.  However, I see this as an opportunity to grow emotionally, perhaps spiritually.  Rather than to wallow in the negative symptoms, I will work on embracing these feelings and sensations, and explore them further.

I completely forgot to do the push-ups yesterday.  I thought about doing them *several* times throughout the day, both at work and at home, and then... just never got to them.  I realized this omission this morning, while I was on my bike.  Well, this is why this is a challenge.  I was/am prepared to miss a day here and there.  I will (try to remember to) do 2 sessions of push-ups - 3 sets of 15 reps per session - today, to make up for yesterday.

Overall, I'm pleased with the progress I've made this week. I am sorry that I did not make it to the gym this week, and then there was the mishap with the push-ups challenge, but I know that really, my most important goal for this month is the weight-loss goal.

I'm looking forward to enjoying this weekend.  I am already enjoying it.  Nothing special going on - just my usual laundry, gym, birdfeeders chores.  It just FEELS good to be home.


Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 07/10/2021:
Wow! So close to goal! Congrats!

Wish I could extract cosmic feelings from IF & calorie restriction. But I just feel like I’m starving. & sometimes miserable. Then when the scale drops I feel better.

Yep! It’s not easy. I hate working out in our gym. So does Matt. And he uses it faithfully & has for like 25 years. He’s more disciplined than I am.

I’m making more of an effort when he’s in the gym to use the treadmill there. It’s an old one. The incline is broken, but he propped it up on some lumber for me. He uses the newer treadmill in the gazebo. I hate that thing and have never used it since I re-injured my muscle tear on it last December.

Donkey on 07/11/2021:
Thank you! And thank you for your candid response about fasting and calorie restriction. That actually helps me feel more grounded in reality. I was thinking to myself, What am I missing?

bearcountrygg on 07/10/2021:
I would step on with my right foot first too....YEAH...ONLY 1 pound away!!!!! It is hard.....creating new habits makes it get easier......but the big reward is in feeling better. Have a great weekend!!!

Donkey on 07/11/2021:
LOL - right foot weigh-ins only, from here on out!

I really want to learn the lessons and habits this time around. I do NOT want to have to go through this again.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/11/2021:
I certainly DO trust your scale. perhaps it's some water weight too, but, you have done the work and now you are being compensated nicely for it all! this is your reward, especially if you continue to stick with this!

I have heard that too, about some people who fast and it feels good. doesn't work for me either, unfortunately.

i totally get it on forgetting to do an exercise or not doing it early so then things get in the way...that is what happened with me with weights this week. Friday was the day; but i skipped. Saturday was the makeup day but plans changed and i got home far later than expected and so i skipped it...not that this is a good pattern...but at the moment i'm doing OK with weights and although i've had some skips, my strength is still pretty decent. (another reason to take off days even if weather is terrible this week is to get back on track with a few training sessions that are solid...).

Donkey on 07/11/2021:
You make some very good points, which touch on exactly the approach I want to be taking.

Why *not* trust my scale? Right? The glass is half-full. It's all relative anyway. The number went down and that's the important thing, as far as meeting goals.

It's not a good pattern, but all we can do is move forward with the day we have. That's one important lesson I'm still learning. Also, things come up in life that cause skips and such, and so it's important to remain flexible.

Flexible and positive :-)

Donkey - Friday Jul 09, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 137.0

Oh my, short on time to write...

I've noticed a little slipping lately, and while you may think I'm being too hard on myself, I want to reach my goal:

  • 2nd day in a row I had a Diet Coke at work, to get me through.  I will not do this today. 
  • Had frozen bananas after evening bike ride, before bed.  I'm not going over daily calories, and the bananas don't throw off my macro ratios.  Also, I do not wake up hungry.  But I want to have a sustained fast (12 hours).  Also, like we've discussed here on DD before, after dinner, THE KITCHEN IS CLOSED.

Tomorrow is weigh-in, so I think that I have the determination not to fall into either of these 2 pits.

 Did not have a great lower body weight training session after dinner, but it was something.  (Barbell squats, 4 sets of 15)

Work was actually OK.  Associate Attorney was out most of the day.  He still has not forwarded a single email to me.  I had a realtor email me yesterday saying, "I sent (AA) a contract earlier today but didn't hear back, so I'm sending it to you."  Ha ha ha - ya think???  I responded right away, thanking her for sending us the contract, saying we'd get started right away.  (And secretly thinking, That's what you get when you leave out Donkey.)

My husband had an appointment with his rheumatologist yesterday, and they discussed the fatty liver diagnosis.  She did mention that if he can't lose weight on diet alone, that he may need to go on a medically supervised diet, or worst case, do some kind of intervention (she suggested wiring jaw shut) to force the weight loss.

Still waiting to hear from the dietician...

Progress as of today: 49.5 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 07/09/2021:
You’re doing great! Keep on keeping on!

Wow, wiring the jaw shut. Like that new magnetic way of closing the mouth they developed in the UK, I think it was. They said it was for ppl who needed to lose weight prior to surgery.

Aren’t those medically supervised diets mostly liquids?

Donkey on 07/10/2021:
Thank you! You're right - I gotta keep on going. I also need to start thinking about what to do after I reach my goal, as far as how to maintain. I may continue to track macros for another complete month after I reach goal, to get the "feel" of maintaining, if that makes sense. So if I reach goal July 20th, then I would continue to track all of August (a full month), too.

I saw the mouth magnet you had posted, which looks a lot better than the photos I've seen of a jaw wired shut.

My mom was on a supervised diet that had real food. Yes, it also had shakes and meal replacement bars, but there were also prepared meals and a list of "free foods" that were unlimited, which I believe included non-starchy vegetables... maybe some/most/all fruits?

The program my mom used is called HMR. She said it worked for her because she never felt hungry. She's used the program twice, because she had gained 20 pounds after my step-father died.

I think something like that would work for my husband, if he couldn't lose the weight on his own. However, he DID lose 50 pounds on his own so that he could have hip replacement surgery. He CAN do it, but for him, dieting has an "end". He needs to make permanent lifestyle changes.

That's kind of why I want to go with him to meet the dietician.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/10/2021:
nice job to watch yourself slipping and realize you want to continue to challenge yourself to do better. all within your limits and what you feel you need to do is of course what you should do! also, try to realize that whatever you do, there is wiggle room, so you can work on keeping your weight lower for a long time..You are almost at your set goal here. really nice work to you!

wow. wire of the jaw. i can send your hubby my jaw issue, he's certainly most prob eat less as it hurts to open my mouth wide. i still eat lol, but my jaw does hurt when i open it wide.

it's funny with not copying people on emails...same thing happens at work here, but most of the time everyone is copied as everyone knows it's best to copy everyone.

Donkey - Thursday Jul 08, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 137.0

Not as much time to post this morning.  Rode the bike longer than I had initially planned for a day with weights.  Did 2 leg weights exercises with the anticipation of doing more tonight.

I have an unexpected appointment at the DMV to renew my driver's license, so I'm already getting kind of anxious about that - governmental agencies, driving issues, it's all a psychological hurricane for me. Very intimidating.  The good news is that my daughter has an appointment for her driver's license too, at the same time, so hopefully we can go together, or at least meet up there.  So that will be my lunch hour.  I'm lucky to have an understanding Boss who lets us do things like that, within reason.

So for now, that nervousness is distracting me from any feelings of hunger, work-dread, etc. 

Progress as of today: 49.5 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 07/08/2021:
Sucks you have to go to DMV. Matt & I just renewed ours online. They made an exception due to covid. We were due to go in, but it’s postponed. Not the new Real ID, the other kind, but we have no plans to fly. So old is ok.

Donkey on 07/09/2021:
I wish I could have done mine online. If I didn't have that vision restriction preventing me from doing so, I certainly would have done so.

I believe that in Illinois, having the Real ID will become mandatory. The flyer my daughter got says October 1, 2021, but I think that's been extended into 2023 due to COVID.

horn_of_plenty on 07/08/2021:
i do not think a diet coke is the worst thing in the world and you have to call it BAD, maybe i'd call it BAD too, but, tasty and helpful at times.

below entry is why i try to keep treats at work, for those noshy times. especially treats that are sweets. so i have it to satisfy me when i want them.

i hope your DMV visit goes well, the only thing anxiety producing is the annoying wait (when i go....always a long line).

Donkey on 07/09/2021:
Had another Diet Coke yesterday, as a crutch. I do not want this to become a habit.

Going with my daughter made the DMV almost fun :-D We both agree that it sucks, and it never gets better.

Donkey - Wednesday Jul 07, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 137.0

Writing tonight, maybe instead of tomorrow morning, when I have more time.  I think I've caught up on comments to recent entries, except for Bear's because her diary is set to private right now, which is fine.

The reason I'm writing tonight is because I want to write about how HARD it was today as far as eating goes.  I had my big cup of chicken broth at 10:15am so I was still hungry at 11am.  Made myself another big cup.

I ate everything I brought for lunch and was satisfied, but that meant that all I had left was the Greek yogurt I brought for afternoon snack.  Sometimes I'll have my fruit from lunch right after I walk, and then yogurt later.

To help keep my hunger controlled, I had a diet Coke (BAD, I know) right before lunch, and then in the afternoon, I had a large cup of iced coffee (black).

When I  got home, I couldn't help but eat some red grapes, while waiting for dinner to start.  Had dinner. Had 2 chocolate Kisses and a large cup of decaf (with heavy whipping cream) as usual for dessert.  Did my evening routine.  Hungry again, so I just finished up a bowl of frozen banana slices.  And now I think I'm ready to go upstairs to get ready for bed.

I forgot to do my push-ups at work, so I did them tonight, before logging on (and before frozen banana)

I realized that if I am to fulfill my goal of going to the gym 1x during the week, tonight was the night to do it, and I did not. I suppose I could still go Friday night, if I want to, but I'm pretty sure that I won't.  This is a GOOD goal to have, but I guess I won't be making it this week.  I'll try again next week.  It might be easier, because I will be alone (with Daughter and Husband in Vegas).

I'm so glad tomorrow is Thursday!

Progress as of today: 49.5 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 07/08/2021:
Pushups, many people say, are one of the best upper body strength training moves!!! yes, a good exercise for upper body training.

will write more later.

Donkey - Wednesday Jul 07, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 137.0

Having an incredibly stressful morning today...  any extra time that I might have had was consumed by a big coffee mess that met me this morning.  I forgot to replace the carafe in the coffee machine, so there was coffee EVERYWHERE when I came downstairs this morning.  So  not only the big mess, but also the very disturbing feeling that I left so many things undone last night before I went upstairs to go to bed.  And yet, I STILL did not go promptly to sleep, but stayed up on my phone too damn late...

So hopefully this means that today can only get better.  

New Girl started yesterday and she'll be just fine.

Eating went well yesterday.

Yesterday was upper body weights and I did well.  

At least I remembered to do my push-ups - at work, in a private space.

Nice Lady is posting all over Facebook about her vacation.  Only she could take a vacation down to Florida just in time for the tropical storm.  So HUGE drama about her trying to fly back home early, finding a new hotel, being scared, blah blah blah.

Associate Attorney isn't checking his emails every day, and forwarding things that I should be working on, to me.  Oh well, not my place to say anything.  I hope there's contracts in there where we miss attorney review.  That's because people insist on emailing the *attorney* rather than the paralegal (me).  Dumb agents.

I thought my Boss was doing much better on a mentally functioning level until late yesterday afternoon, when I realized just how much he is slipping.  I was left with another big mess to deal with, and today, he can work on cleaning it up, because I've already had enough messes to clean up for today.

Progress as of today: 49.5 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 07/07/2021:
Wow! A shame about the coffee mess! I grind beans and use a drip coffee maker. Was broken hearted when the carafe broke when I washed it. Fortunately, I liked that red Bella coffee maker so much that I had 2. Matt repaired the broken one with a special glue. That carafe is stored away for future use in case I bust the second one worse. Being VERY careful with it!

Your job sounds so stressful! Would it work for you to do part time? That’s what Matt wants & he has, but they keep getting big contracts and making him do full time. When things are occasionally slow, he takes an unpaid day.

Donkey on 07/07/2021:
I don't know if I was more upset about the wasted coffee (used the good beans, too!), or the mess, or the fact that I forgot to finish up last night. The mess was physically hard and so time-consuming. And I thought I got it all, but my husband found more of it in the cupboard under the countertop. Then I found that the silverware drawer was full of coffee.

My personality would suit part-time work much better than full-time work, but right now, I feel that we can't financially afford it.

innerpeace on 07/07/2021:
Oh No about the coffee. When my mom was visiting she did that. Good thing DH was close buy and only a bit ran all over the counter. It happens...

We had a hydrologist that was called in to help on the east coast offices (usually North & South Carolina) and I would have to schedule her flights in and out during the mess of hurricanes - so incredibly troublesome so in a way I feel for Nice Lady...but then the mean side wants to say...it's been all over the news for a week so she should have postponed in advance....oh those pesky Hurricanes, just pop up out of the blue like that ruining plans at a moment's notice.

I hope New Girl works out. Great job on ding your push ups at work. Have a great evening!

Donkey on 07/07/2021:
I've done this before, but the mess was not as extensive.

From what I can see on Facebook, Nice Lady is still making the best of the vacation. So... I think she seeks drama, and likes the attention she gets when she makes a big deal about things.

horn_of_plenty on 07/07/2021:
yuck what a coffee mess, so sorry! !!!

nice job with office pushups, lately i am missing my 5 min walks at lunch due to catching up with coworkers, small chat, which may be more important anyways as it's only 5 min and sometimes getting along with coworkers is better.

I have advice that in his emails, attorney should highlight in yellow the typing and write to always CC you on their responses to him...

i highly advise trying to change up the system and urging attorney to add that sentence somwhere into his emails where they can see it.

Donkey on 07/07/2021:
I think that the chatting with co-workers is more important in your case. There's nothing like having solid relationships at work.

The attorneys don't use email. The emails are supposed to come through my desk and I coordinate the communications. The attorneys write letters that I send back and forth.

This is changing with New Guy but I'm not his assistant. But he uses email a LOT and his assistant (Mistakes Girl) is always copied. His agents seem to be much more compliant in the request to copy her in all emails.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/07/2021:
older lady, 44 lol, at work...she said she's motivated to now get into pushups. she works out tons. much stronger than me. prob stronger than one man at work. she's tough.

she never did pushups, but she thinks it will improve her overall build! so there! pushups are GOOD!

Donkey on 07/07/2021:
The older lady is right! She'll need to be consistent. I know that "every day" isn't the healthiest goal, which is why I do them for only a month. But to incorporate them in upper body weight training days is a great idea. Hmm... I think I'll do that in August, so as not to lose all the gains I anticipate making this month.

Donkey - Monday Jul 05, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 137.0

SO GLAD AND GRATEFUL I have today off for the holiday ....  And even better, I know that tomorrow (Tuesday) when I go back to work, most of the attorneys will be gone all day.  Yay!!!

Had my morning bike ride, and after I'm done writing here, I plan to go outside and enjoy the fresh air before it gets too hot. Oh my yesterday was BRUTAL outside, like standing in front of an open oven.  No fireflies, but the cicadas are here, so yes, it's summer.

I'm waiting for Daughter to get up to see what she feels like doing today, if anything.  I'm thinking a coffee shop and then maybe some sales shopping at Bath & Body Works for scented candles  I think getting my nails done is kind of out of my comfort zone - but I'll do it if that's really what she wants to do.  I'd love to go to the gym, but Mondays are usually my rest day, and I'm thinking that maybe I really need the rest.  I could move my rest day to Wednesday...  Or I could do a light workout...  Or maybe I'll go tonight?  I'm not sure.

Cleaning those stairs yesterday was quite the endeavor.  My left hand/wrist started hurting - must have been leaning on it or using it incorrectly.  In fact by the end of the cleaning, my arms - especially my triceps - were letting me know that they were done.  I should do the stairs more often and perhaps only half at a time, like a rotation or schedule.

I was tired after the stairs, so when I went to the gym, I chose not to go "gung ho" but took it rather easy.  It was not crowded at all. 

Dinner with the Husband was quiet, and I went to bed early because I was tired.  I could see some fireworks from sitting in bed!  And when those stopped around 9:30p, I turned off the light and went to sleep for some much needed rest... 

AFTERNOON EDIT:  Looks like I will be having a late lunch with my daughter, and then see what happens from there.  This will be my first time back in an indoor restaurant.  

I'm not sure about the shopping... I think Horn or IP had posted that the deals weren't that great?  Maybe it was Mistakes Girl?  And I'm not sure I want to deal with any of that.

Just wanted to let you all know that I'm up to date on my daily push-ups challenge, even though that means I was up at 11pm doing push-ups on Saturday night, LOL...

Progress as of today: 49.5 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 07/05/2021:
Cooler here today.

No circadas, but some beautiful fireflies dancing on the lawn last night.

Hate fireworks. They scared Frankie. Poor tiny baby mutt.

Donkey on 07/05/2021:
Cooler temps due here on Tuesday or Wednesday, and they should last a stretch.

I love the sound of cicadas in the summer -- takes me way back to my childhood.

The fireworks were very pretty - that I saw - but I could do without the real loud boomers, and I detest crowds, probably even more so now after COVID.

Jacky82020 on 07/05/2021:
Fireworks are pretty from a distance. The house across the street, up on a hill, was owned for years by a neurosurgeon who put on an incredible display. Drove me & the dogs nuts. Thank god he finally moved! must have cost him thousands of dollars. he was a really nice guy. Loved mowing his vast lawn and plowed our snow for free whenever he did his driveway, which was often.

bearcountrygg on 07/05/2021:
Good job with the push up challenge!!! Sounds like cleaning the stairs is a workout in it's self!!...That's not a bad thing!

bearcountrygg on 07/05/2021:
No fireworks here but lots of gun shots after dark......

Horn_of_plenty on 07/05/2021:
i know what you mean, my mom always had trouble finding pants as she is also petite and has some curves.

now some stores have the "short" sizes like at old navy which sometimes has deals. but of course you'd want to visit the store to see how their pants fit. good for you on the second-hand. huge savings with that! maybe in the future i'll venture more that way, but i tend to do pretty well with Old Navy as i have their credit card and the past few years i use it to make other purchases too - and i get rewarded in dollars and then get free clothes. i like their clothes, so it works out well.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/05/2021:
i cannot believe people complain they have no rights here in the US. let me tell you, France (my friend lives there) has had a lot more regulation on what people can and can't do up until this point. I believe masks must still be worn everywhere in paris, but not positive.

you are so smart not to push that shoulder more than you should. by not pushing, you'll prolong all the things you can do, without more pain.

Reading your entry from yesterday, it sounds wonderful. you have a great relationship with your daughter, since she is your only daughter unlike my sister and i...it's a different relationship between us and my mom - though my relationship with my mom has improved greatly, lately! :)

Horn_of_plenty on 07/05/2021:
i'm grateful to have the extra time off, too. yesterday i thought it was going by slowly, but now it's flying by! (Hello 5:30pm Monday!)

That's right! It's $10 off the 3 wick candles. the only better deal of the year is after thanksgiving, when they are less than $10 each.... :) i was so tempted to go in there yesterday as there was a B&B Works in the shopping center, but since i still have candles at home, i told myself to wait until November LOL. Literally though.

Fireworks here went on forever last night! They were pretty and loud :) Def making up for last year's minimal works.

Nice you could see them from your bed. It's VERY easy for me to see plenty of them also.

Wise of you to just do what you could at the gym, especially after a home workout of cleaning :) that's exercise too :)

Let us know if the indoor restaurant was worth it - was the food good :)

Donkey - Sunday Jul 04, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 137.0

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!!!!  Democracy isn't easy but I'm so grateful that I live in this country.

What an odd-feeling morning, though...  Almost felt like a Monday.  Blasphemy!  And it doesn't feel like a holiday.  We don't do much for this holiday.

Had a great (?) workout at the gym yesterday...  I did 10 minutes more on the elliptical (30 minutes instead of 20), and that's great, but I didn't like the pre-programmed pattern/route that comes along with that 10 minute extension.  So I won't do that again unless it's a "cardio only" day.  I did slightly heaver upper body weights, and tried a new machine for shoulders, but that was a mistake.  My left shoulder has either a touch of arthritis or an old injury that didn't heal properly, and I could feel that I was REALLY testing its' limits.  Fortunately, Left Shoulder has been forgiving this morning, but I *won't* use that machine again.  I need to use very light hand-held weights if I'm going to do lateral raises.

Food and water went well.  No challenges there.

 My daughter had to go into work early, so she was up at 7am - quite a change in her routine, and thus, my morning routine, since she usually works 2nd shift hours and doesn't wake up early.  It was nice to see her and chat a little bit.

TOM finally decided to show up today, in full force WITH cramps, so the gym might be kind of "iffy" today and tomorrow. Still, I'm glad it showed up on my days off, so that I can deal with it in the comfort of my own home.

Today I've decided to try to shampoo the carpeted stairs - there are about 15 of them, 2 of them with a larger surface area, because the stairs are not straight up, but turn at the wall.  I figured it would be good to vacuum them first, which is quite challenging on the arms.  I'll start the shampoo adventure after I'm done writing here.  Should not take more than an hour.  However, I anticipate that this too will be somewhat physically demanding (hand-held attachment, not like a vacuum cleaner).

Daughter proposed a couple of different activities that we could do together, in addition to the gym:  there are a couple of cafes that she wants to try (we'd go to one or the other, not both) and she suggested getting our nails done.  This is why I think I may just go to the gym on my own, do it quick, come home and shower & clean up, and then do things with my daughter.  Her job is very physically demanding, so I'm not sure that going to the gym on her day off is what she wants to do.  And because of TOM, I've kind of ruled out the hot tub and/or steam room.  Besides, hot tub and steam room don't feel all that great when it's 90F degrees out...  Yes, I think we will something OTHER than the gym, as long as she is OK with that.

No yoga tomorrow, because the instructor is going out to dinner with her out-of-town son.  I'm completely OK with that.  Daughter *might* be home with us, but I'm guessing she'll find something to do with friends, either in real life or online.  That's fine.

Anyway, for today, I'm hoping to catch a nap later on, either before or after the gym or both, LOL...

Progress as of today: 49.5 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

innerpeace on 07/04/2021:
When I do the elliptical my right foot falls asleep for some reason. I tried different shoes and loosening the laces - so weird.

Have a great time with your daughter whatever the activity. And have a great day!

Donkey on 07/05/2021:
I've had that happen. I've heard it is the position of one's foot on the pedal platform that causes that. That is to say, it's how you're built. And I've tried some ellipticals that ergonomically just didn't work for me - pain, numbness, awkward positioning. I recently heard from some lady that the elliptical hurts her hips, so she prefers the treadmill. To each their own - I would not want to use a machine that made me lose feeling in my feet, that's for sure.

Jacky82020 on 07/04/2021:
Hey, you’re gonna burn off lots of calories doing those stairs!

Sounds like a great workout.

The husband had terrible shoulder pain. Turns out cartridge wore off at the joint and was floating around from all the heavy lifting. They sucked it out laparoscopically & gave us a gross video. Fixed the pain and I told him to lighten up, but he never did and it’s still ok.

Donkey on 07/05/2021:
Oh my those stairs --It was a lot harder than I thought it would be, and took a little longer than I had anticipated.

Jacky82020 on 07/05/2021:
Reward yourself with a Ch’King sandwich! You’ll love it. I get the spicy one. Yum!

Donkey - Saturday Jul 03, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 137.0

 Good morning!  So looking forward to the long weekend.   Nothing special planned, but just enjoying being home.  I am wondering where June went though, because it seems as though we just had a 3-day holiday weekend not so long ago...

Weigh-in....  I'm not sure about this because Husband was in the bathroom with me and watching me weigh myself (not intently, but just watching because he was THERE).  So there was no way that I could explain my 3-times weigh-in  and still sound like a sane person.  And because the first time I stepped on the scale got an error message, I only weighed in once.  OK, I'll take it!  Only 2 more pounds to go, but I will remind myself that this is a good number to be at too, and that's great!  Like I mentioned to Horn in comments to yesterday's entry, I got myself "unstuck" and moving forward.  That is the real victory.

Yesterday, after I added my "morning edit", I got dressed for work and realized that I fit into my beige pair of capri pants this year!  They feel too snug at 145, so I could not wear them at all last summer.  That's a nice victory to have, too -- physical validation that I've lost weight.  

Definitely have going to the gym on the agenda today, Sunday, and Monday.  Daughter thinks she has Monday off, and said she'd go with me.  Well, I'm definitely going on my day off, whether she comes along or not, but that would be nice... really nice.  I did not take a walk this morning, but maybe I'll try one in the evening.

Progress as of today: 49.5 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 07/03/2021:
Way to go, girl! You’re doing great. Congrats.

Donkey on 07/04/2021:
Thank you!!! I *should* be able to lose 2 pounds, in one month, right? (lol?)

bearcountrygg on 07/03/2021:
Congrats on getting unstuck!!!! And the pants!!!!! Definitely go to the gym...you are on a roll!!

Donkey on 07/04/2021:
For me, the momentum (in the right direction) is the real feat. I tend to be inert in most, if not all, aspects of my life.

Honest tracking has been the game changer for me.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/04/2021:
Me too! just LOVING this long weekend. and it does feel long right now - being it's still only Sunday morning ! :)

June went by really fast for me, too.

Yes, you are definitely "unstuck!" Visually, just looking at your chart, is the proof!

I also love that feeling of putting on pants that used to be too tight and having them fit well. I have had that feeling a few times in life; loved it!

Have fun at the gym - I am eager to go but it doesn't fit into my schedule now anyways. Let us know if you go alone or with your daughter.

Donkey on 07/04/2021:
I'm short, but have "thicker" thighs and wider hips than what most waistlines call for, so finding pants - much less capri pants or peddle-pushers is quite challenging. Add to the equation is that I buy mainly second-hand nowadays. I've had quite a few second-hand clothes, that I believe were donated because the sizing was off - either on the tag or in the measurement & cut of the material.

So that I can add a pair of any bottoms is GREAT! And especially for summer, because most of my pants are more for cooler weather.

This weekend is my husband's medication day for his auto-immune disease, so I do not expect his participation in going to the gym at all. Monday is up in the air, and I'll write more about that in today's (Sunday's) entry.

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