Daughter and I spoke to Mr. Donkey again last night, at dinner, about eating less meat. Mindful portion control went well again yesterday, although I realized, as I was putting chicken on my plate, that I probably took a little more than what I *should* have, if I'm looking to reduce the amount of meat I eat.
Yesterday, we had a client come in with her husband to re-do their wills, since so much had changed since they had their wills last drawn up. These are ex-neighbor's of the boss' daughter. They brought their youngest child, who looked to be about 3 or 4. Her husband looked to be in his-mid 30s. She looked much, much older. I told my boss as he stepped into his meeting to find out how old she was and if he thought I looked that old at my age, then I needed an intervention.
So I am 49, and this woman is 42. Nice Lady is 72 and she looks about the same as Lady Client - wow! Now granted, Nice Lady looks great for her age - people never think she's 72, but still! I asked my boss what the story was, and he said that Lady Client had recently lost a lot of weight. I asked if she had been sick, and he said, no, she just lost the weight. Of course, he didn't say that I looked as old as she did, so then I asked him if he thought I was fat, and he said, no, if I lost any more weight, we'd lose you to the wind.
(Talk about putting my boss on the spot -- poor man...)
Anyway, Nice Lady, and Mistakes Girl (who is 27) had a conversation about this client, and how this has completely thrown me for a tailspin, with my whole issue about dying my hair. Just when I had eased into self-acceptance, then something like THIS happens.
I am going to try to stay grounded and focus on today, and try not to think too much about things that in the long run, are inevitable or not important. Right?
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
Just a quick check-in to say that mindful eating went well yesterday. I was very deliberate in the amount of meat I put on my plate last night, and then took no more.
Did not do weight training, but should get to doing some of that tonight.
Trying to convince my boss to take a mini-vacation (long weekend) up to the Detroit area, to buy his wife a motorized scooter.
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
I'm glad you are doing well. I really don't like to eat big servings any more of meat. like i was telling you. i took two meatballs with my lunch and even that seems like a lot. my friend Christine had made me some but she added some veggies into them and mozz cheese so they look bigger than they really are as there's more than meat in them. lately i don't eat a lot of meat so i am craving it. like at the water park, i was so happy to eat the huge hamburger. one of my goals for this Winter is to cook more meat/chicken.
i hope you are able to weight train. i had a good session last night...and i was reminded that i should prob not skip another day for awhile since last week's session was weak in some areas.
My boss likes to travel and do things. With his wife unable to walk much at all (she uses a walker now), this has curtailed his wanderlust greatly.
I'm training fewer muscle groups during my sessions, it seems. I need to get a couple of weight plates for my weight bench.
I bought the flavored sampler pack... so far... they are ok if you want a specific flavoring and are into flavored coffee creamers. After this though I will just buy the unsweetened plain flavor in bulk.
This is actually a really good way to do MCTs / bulletproof coffee. You can stick some in a ziploc or canister and put it in your purse for work/out and about. I still pour in a little of my dad's 2% milk, but at least the transfat and cholesterol profile is waay better.
I'll have to do some more research. I had a Amazon list going on, but then my husband went and ordered stuff for himself on his own. So now my list will have to wait. (Had a fight about it last night, now going for the silent burn...)
The wonderful thing about books & libraries is that whatever crisis you're going through, someone has probably already been through it and written a book about it.
My library never has any of the books that I want at the moment that I want it - I usually have to do an inter-library loan request - but I think this was meant to be, because I found a book yesterday written by a woman who has gone through this whole debate about coloring her hair! I hope you realize, it's not really about coloring the hair, but rather, one's approach and acceptance of the aging process.
I would have started the book last night, but I also checked out another book about aging, but more so towards the end of life -- and I still have the book I held onto, to finish up.
I admit that I'm fascinated by the whole process of aging. I think what really started it was my memberships to a couple of FB groups for "weight training over 50". It's mostly men, but there are quite a few women. However, some of the women are trying to look older than they really are. And that's fine if that's how they want to carry themselves, but I see some of these pictures and think that they're trying *too* hard - it looks so unnatural that it's almost embarrassing for them (although they obviously don't see it for themselves).
Back to my friend who got an old-lady haircut, I believe, from what my daughter told me, that she got this hair style for convenience. As her hair was getting greyer, it was also changing the texture, and this new haircut will be easier for her to manage/control. I get that. And her hair won't change any of the admiration that I still have for her.
So just as I made peace with this whole hair thing, my 19 year old daughter comes bouncing in with a box of hair-dye, wanting to change her hair and her life -- "happiness in a box". So I asked her how come she didn't get me a box - after all, I want to be happy too - but then I was OK that she did not get me one too.
(More to say in my responses to your comments in yesterday's entry...)
Goals:
totally agree about the books...lots of advice / authors in same situations or same emotions. books help me a lot to mentally "toughen up" or to expose myself to tough people/tough situations.
you've gotta share what you read about the woman & her "hair color crisis" as i'd like to know anything of interest..
i totally understand your friend and the chopping of her hair. after all, i did it myself. if my hair was thicker/smoother/more naturally fine with more keratin to keep it smoother, i'd have probably not cut it. but it tends to get damaged as i used to put it up a lot for exercise and i had a lot of split ends. i don't see myself struggling with long hair any time soon, either.
i've been getting more sleep like you also and i also am restarting weights tonight (took Sunday off / weekend off) as to relax a little more and give myself some extra down time to "feel good" in my attempt to not run myself into the ground (it worked).
I'll recap some thoughts, and then I want to talk to you all about something I'm having an awful time processing, and I don't know where to go with these feelings and thoughts.
RECAP:
I moved my evening exercise bike yesterday afternoon and it has made all of the difference in the world! Wow, I should have done that months ago. I can see the TV better, and I have more room for my weight bench and my morning exercise bike. I have not yet really done weights on the weight bench, but it's on my list of possibilities today.
I was most productive until about 10:30a today. Now I've had a breather for about an hour. I still have stuff to do on my list, but I've gotten done what I wanted/needed to do. The rest is optional, if I am looking for something to do. This includes weights and yoga (easy yoga, DVD at home).
Beautiful sunny day, cooler temperatures. Need to enjoy these days before winter...
OK, now on to what has been bothering me.
My daughter's best friend's mom is about my age, give or take a few years. Seriously, I'm 49, and I don't think she's much older, if she IS older. She might actually be 46, 47...
Anyway, she has had this beautiful full head of naturally curly hair, very dark brown or black, but like the rest of us, the grey hairs have been coming in, but I'd say at least half of her hair is still dark.
So my daughter tells me yesterday -- yes, this is how long I've been chewing on this, I was so shocked! - that Mrs. B got an old lady haircut! Rather than this beautiful mane of shoulder-length hair, now she has a shorter, bowl-cut, cap-like hairstyle! Because her hair is so full and curly, though, it looks like a short afro, almost. My daughter says that the shorter hair makes Mrs. B look like a little old-lady, with her hair looking much greyer with the short style.
Let me first say, there is nothing wrong with short hair styles for women. They can be cute, stylish, cutting-edge, etc. But to have a hairstyle that makes you look older, that brings out the grey.... I cannot handle this. And this is from someone who I've always admired as being modern, gutsy, forward-thinking.
I've been struggling with whether to color my hair or let it go grey. I have only grey in the front, framing my face. The rest of it is still brown. I stopped dying it because my hair is thinning out and I was afraid that the harsh chemicals were causing more harm than good. But now, seeing one of my PEERS turning into a "little old lady" --- ACK! I'm freaking out!
Please understand, I have no problem with grey hair. If my whole head were grey or even 50-50, I'd be OK with it. I don't like where I have these whisps and patches of grey. Once I have more grey, I do not think I'll have a problem keeping it grey.
I know some of you here are older than I, and therefore, have had the experience and wisdom of having gone through this already. I guess emotionally, I didn't think this would happen for another few years??? Why would anyone willing want to look older than they are?
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
That is to say, I'm sure her feelings do get hurt and stuff, but at the end of the day, she's very comfortable in her own skin. At least that's how she comes across to me.
I also like your comment about how it takes away the natural look away. Yep 100%
maybe she was just sick of all her hair so she cut it in the summer for ease? for instance, the only real reason i keep my hair short is that it's not really wavy or totally straight and i have trouble maintaining it, so i cut it because it's easy for me to get ready in the mornings. that's the reason.
maybe she did the same.
i am almost 37 and do not have many grays. i started getting them a couple years ago, but, they have stayed for now at minimum. i was dying my hair with highlights to cover them up, but now i don't care again because for now it's just a few.
I suppose I should embrace my grey highlights. I think that's what I should do.
However, I do OK with a cute bob, just under the chin, as long as it's all one length. I've been toying about going back to that, but for now, I'm going to keep it long.
And if I don't, just do a shampoo, and I'm back to Donkey brown (with grey).
I might pick up a few kits of this stuff and give it a try...
Well... I was writing, and then the page decided to update itself and I lost everything I wrote....
I slept in this morning - a gift to myself - so I did not weigh in, but I know I will definitely weigh in next Saturday, to mark the end of Summer (in my mind at least), the beginning of the last trimester of 2019, and set some goals for myself.
I often realize that it's been about a month since my birthday, and I feel as though I have not made the most of any of the days that have since passed. Most of my time, it would seem, is consumed by the mundane.
I do not have much planned for today, other than to go to the library. I need a new book to read at night. I'm not enthralled with what I'm reading right now, and my husband says he'd like to go too, so that's something we can do together. Other projects:
My laundry is done washing, which means it's time to start my day!
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
i never have really thought of the year in trimesters till you wrote it here. what an interesting view - and of course reality.
i can totally relate to your feelings of mundane and not making progress. i have spent the summer just trying not to overdo and as you know i laid of cardio a lot in order to not hurt myself but now i'm feeling a struggle again to push forward.
i see you don't love the book you are reading! what a coincidence...mine is starting to get repetitive on the subject matter and i'm not even 50% through so i will prob start skipping around a few pages here and there and then return it. same with the next book...i don't think i'll read the whole thing (the nazi story you read).
Had a terrible time sleeping last night. I kept dreaming that my alarm was going off! The first time, at 1:27a, I realized I hadn't put on my FitBit - left it in the charger, so I got up and put it on, but I woke up at least 3 more times thinking my alarm was going off, and it wasn't.
Yoga was fun last night, but I wore the wrong shirt, so I was a bit uncomfortable. Also, because I had my daughter with me, I chose a different area, so on the other side of me, I had a man, and that was a little distracting (not that he was handsome or anything, but rather, that I was more self-conscious, which kind of defeats the whole purpose).
There was a lot of hissing and growling with the cats, too. Last month, it was also noticeable, but I thought it was because the weather was so hot and humid. I don't know if there's bully cats or if having all these strange people in the room is stressing out the cats. My daughter said it was all too "Lord of the Flies", which was sad to think about.
I will try to remember to weigh in tomorrow morning, but TOM is about to start, and so... my mindful eating results might not be quite so evident (if there are any actual results) due to hormone issues. I'm not expecting to see anything, because...
I put on a pair of fall/winter pants today, because the weather is cool enough, and they still fit. Not baggy or saggy or any signs that I've lost weight or tighted up... Well, that's OK, because I'm supposed to be on maintenance, anyway, right? Right???
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
But I kid you not, there is a women's retreat not too far from me that offers Horse Yoga. Yep.
I'm not really a horse person.
good to hear your pants are fitting...that's a good thing, Jdonk!
it was cooler here today too. If the weather stays this way for awhile, it will be nice (upper 70's,low 80's)
Signed my husband and I up for the Library Chair Yoga on September 11th. I registered him first, so as to be sure he had his seat reserved, but there's still enough room for me too, so I did it, too.
Had reservations about taking more time off, just for Chair Yoga, but being that it will be 9/11, I already know that I'm probably going to welcome anything that is positive, calming, and uplifting. It's a difficult day.
Cat Yoga tonight with the daughter! I hope she likes it! I want to introduce her to George, if he's still there. I'm quite smitten with him. He's orange.
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
In Library Chair Yoga, he's in the minority. In Veterans' Chair Yoga, I'm usually the only gal.
and that's nice you are doing something positive on 9/11.
Unfortunately, I did not have the opportunity to log in last night. I had planned to ride my bike, workout 100% with my weight bench, and then log in. I was so tired that I could hardly finish the bike ride! Went to bed early, but woke up at 2:30a ready to start the day. That is too early, so I tossed and turned for a long time... I must have gone back to sleep because when the alarm went off at 5am, I was so tired. But I got up anyway, because I still wanted to start the day. The best way to shake that sleepy feeling is to get up and get started.
So now I have the extra time to log in here.
It would have done no good to log in and write about yesterday anyway, because it was pretty much the same as Monday. I'm so frustrated with my boss. He's usually out at closings, that seem to be taking longer than usual, so I'm thinking he stops and shops or goes home before coming back to the office. When he is in the office, he doesn't want to work. But he doesn't want to go home. He wants to sit around and chat, joke, gossip, etc. He almost had Male Co-Worker write his attorney letters for him yesterday! (I realized I could have done it, but then I would have been way far behind in my work.) And I feel bad for our clients! They shouldn't be getting bad news from one of us - that's for the attorney to do! That's what they're paying him for!
Monday night I did a brief run with the weight bench, just trying out different settings, without using any weights. I was very clumsy, so I put off doing a real workout, but as I wrote above, that didn't happen last night. I need to move around some furniture so that I have more room. Tried to do that this morning, but it's going to require more effort than I was ready to put out this morning. Besides, then I would have had the time to write here this morning, and I really did want to check in.
Please know that if I do not write or comment, I'm still reading your entries and thinking of you all.
Anyway, speaking of clumsy, the yoga studio from last Sunday's epic is having a FREE session where all 5 (or 6) trainees are teaching one session -- I think where they are switching off during the session. Sunday's drill sargeant yoga instructor is included (of course, as she is one of the trainees). I decided to pass on this, because if I do decide to attend the other sessions, I would like it to be with one instructor at a time. So I will wait for the next free instructor session in September, and decide if there will be a Chapter 2 to my Yoga Adventures.
The yoga studio owner is offering a 5-session ticket for $100 on meditation. The sessions are 1 to 1.5 hours long... Unfortunately, they are in the late afternoon on Sundays, and that's family dinner, and calm down time for me, before I start the workweek. (Yes, I need that down time on Sunday, starting around dinner, to mentally prepare for Monday. Otherwise I'm a wreck of anxiety.)
Chair Yoga for Veterans is canceled for September, so I'm going to sign the husband and myself up for the other chair yoga offered at the library. I'll have to miss half a day, but if nobody else wants to work at work, then I think I can take some time off too.
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
I like your plans regarding yoga both regular and chair. I do hope you will enjoy that afternoon of it with your hubby.
I also like to have down time at home and it really helps me relax as well.
Yoga Disaster Afterthoughts:
The yoga studio is 2 doors down from this really good Mexican restaurant. I hadn't had lunch before class, because yoga on a full stomach is not a wise choice. Oh my word, after leaving the studio, as the cool air hit my brain --- so did the wonderful aroma of tortillas, salsa, Mexican spices. Oh my....
(I mentioned this in my comments) One of the first things the yoga instructor said was, "Yoga is not a workOUT, it is a work-IN". Trust me when I say: THIS WAS A WORKOUT.
Today was a bit stressful at work. Again, people not showing up to work, phones start ringing, etc.
You know, it's OK if my boss wants to start pulling back a little bit and not being at the office as much, but then he needs to set boundaries, because otherwise I get stuck doing twice as much work, sending out extension requests on deadlines, because he isn't in the office.
He's not admitting to anyone -- in fact, I've heard him deny that he's pulling back. But truth be told, he's just not here as much as I need him to be. Well, I guess I'll just keep on extending out deadlines, asking for more time.
Got marvellous sleep last night. Wasn't too sore from yoga, although I did feel some aches in my neck and my left hamstring and my right hip flexor. I'm going to try to use my new weight bench tonight, but if I don't get to it, then tomorrow night might be a better option. We'll see.
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
Probiotics, greek yogurt, and kale/broccoli will also add to the general atmosphere of the class.
I had to find the Mad TV Sunrise Yoga class clip for you... https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=y_1NajgvvaY
i'm glad you aren't too sore from yoga and mexican does smell nice!
i'll be using my weight bench tonight also :)
(I thought that my free yoga class deserved its own entry, even if it's still Sunday...)
Donkey Yoga Adventures, Chapter 1
Have you ever gotten yourself into something and then realized, I do not belong here -- whether it's the deep end of the pool or a really bad movie or the wrong gender restroom -- have you had that happen?
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
Which reminds me, first thing the instructor said: "Yoga is not a work-OUT, it's a work-IN." Um..., no sweetie, this was a workout. Trust me...
I still think it's wonderful that you tried the class and stayed. i KNOW that your legs look a lot better than you are describing them!
also, the class does sound hard. it's ok to check things out and see if it's for you. even if it was hard for your daughter, she'd have it as a learning experience i'd say.
i miss the days of HOT YOGA when i used to do it. now i do not have time for that, really. it was challenging and many of the poses were also for 1 minute.
i'm glad you did it. you'll have to let us know if you do end up getting sore from the class or not.
after this class, maybe take a couple days to see if it's worth going back. it's sorta nice that they are free. nicer if they benefit you. i do think that there's so many types of yoga/teachers/studios.
also, you can figure you the style of yoga you like and see if any nearby studios have that type....
i'm glad you went!
But please go and do your free classes, you might like it better especially if you know more of what to expect.
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....i love that vocab word, Wanderlust! yes! i have it too, but don't exercise my own wanderlust very often as i prefer routine and being successful at my home routine. LOL.
I don't really have wanderlust. It's just not in me to want to see the world.
Horn_Of_Plenty on 08/28/2019:
the only way i know how to limit my meat is by taking a serving and putting the rest away right away. and also filling my plate with enough other food to be satisfying...veggies. this works well for me at work as i take a portion from home or from the buffet and obviously i cannot go back for more. once in awhile i do feel i need more protein, and i have more but usually i dont' have much because we don't need much protein at one single time at one meal i mean. i got this idea from my friend who used to be much slimmer. her diet is high in carbs and low in just about everything else. she surely doesn't need more protein though, and i realized it was another way to limit calories at a meal as she just didn't eat much of the protein. she'd order fried rice at restaurants and just taste the chicken (a few large bites and that's it - like 4 large bites worth) and then just eat the rice. lol she doesn't even like to eat the bits of veggies that are in the rice! but what i'm saying was, it's a way of minimizing portions. a few large bites of chicken is enough, about one serving. and it's a high quality protein, not like a quinoa or bean serving, but true protein. vegetarians don't even get the true meat source and they are ok...so i figure we don't need as much as we think of the meat/fish/poultry. for instance, half a breast of a rotisserie chicken should be fine. or a drumstick and that's it should be fine....in my opinion for the usual amount. of course, every once in awhile if you are craving more, why not.
so i don't get it...why does the lady look so old? maybe she doesn't eat well? usually even not eating well doesn't cause such a drastic difference. then again, who knows. maybe she had a gastric sleeve or bypass...that may cause serious loss of nutrients and possibly make someone look older (in my opinion!). does she not dye her hair?
i don't think you NEED to dye your hair. i do see people that don't on the subway. sometimes it looks nice natural, but it sure is popular to dye it. it does make you look younger, i have to say the truth.
I'm not sure why Lady Client looked so bad. Perhaps she lost weight too quickly or in an unhealthy way. Her hair isn't grey - the aging is all in her face.
I think dying can make one look younger but can also look artificial. I can probably still do it, because I don't have a lot of wrinkles (yet).
Horn_Of_Plenty on 08/28/2019:
i mean dying hair makes most people look younger, not just you.
I knew where you were coming from. I think we get to a certain point where it's obvious, and that I do not find so attractive.
On the other hand, when I'm totally gray, I do plan to dye my hair something grand like bright blue or red, pink...
I do not think I'm being clear. Little old lady with brown dye job - not so good. Little old lady with bright pink hair - AWESOME!
legcramps on 08/28/2019:
We have no idea how a person's life has changed them. My relative in Hungary, she is 53 and has had a very tough life. She looks older than my mother, who is over 70. She doesn't dye her hair, doesn't dress in current styles, etc. But who cares? I certainly don't; I have enough problems in my own life and I don't need to start comparing mine to hers. We're so different!
So does mindful portion control mean choosing a portion of food that will satisfy you, or choosing a portion you think is the 'correct' size to eat?
You're right - who cares? I've only recently become fascinated by the aging process, perhaps because my stepfather had become sick and then passed away? Or perhaps seeing it in my own mother?
My interest brought about my awareness in my own aging process. It's fascinating when it happens to you.
legcramps on 08/28/2019:
Nvm, I believe I answered my own question to you by re-reading your first paragraph, LOL. Mindful portion control sounds like an excellent way to gauge hunger.
Yes, I felt that I was putting too much meat on my plate at dinner, and then it would sit there like a rock in the evening. I would catch myself taking 2nd helpings of meat, just to prolong the dinner hour with my family, too.
So the mindfulness is to (try to) make sure that I'm getting what I need and not overeating.
There ARE other factors involved, too, but not the main thrust of my goal (environmental, ethics).
Funny how I do not want to overeat with meat, but I have no issue with overeating on vegetables.
Maria7 on 08/28/2019:
I bet you are very beautiful...maybe lacking a little self-confidence, as we all do, but gorgeous, nontheless!
My co-workers were kind enough to say that my grey looks like highlights. Isn't that very nice of them to say?
I also can agree with them, to some degree, because the grey is around my face, like highlights... just maybe not the color I would have chosen initially.
happy-1 on 08/28/2019:
I dunno what could get a guy to eat less meat. Maybe more beer and cheese first!
HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!
Horn_Of_Plenty on 08/29/2019:
love happy's comment hahaha
She's a riot - makes me LOL.
Horn_Of_Plenty on 08/29/2019:
to maria's comment: yes, donkey is very pretty!
Aw shucks... thank you!