So today was very difficult, as we said good bye to our beloved kitty. This was a difficult day.
As hard as this was, it was not particularly conducive to restrictive eating. Exercise was helpful, as a diversion.
Finally, just wanted to say that it seems that collagen in my hot coffee seems to be the solution to my dilemma for the remainder of my supply.
I'm glad today is over.
Progress as of today: 59 lbs lost so far, only -9 lbs to go!
I want to thank you all for being patient with me and allowing me to vent some of my feelings this past week (or 2). Even though it wasn't diet-oriented, I think that it shows that no matter what comes our way, consistency is the key.
There's a lady I follow on Facebook who says she's on a weight-loss journey. She spends a lot of $$$ on Advocare products, although now she gets a discount because she's a distributor. I'm not sure why she spends the money on these products because she continually falls off the plan whenever something happens, and with 4 kids, a husband, and a large extended family, something is always happening. For example, her middle-school son broke his leg, so she couldn't handle the stress and quit for 3 weeks, sliding back on any progress she had made before then, since the last drama in her life. She's trying to grow her Advocare business - and now trying to become a certified personal trainer - but I don't think she's made the connection that she's her best advertisement!
I'm not quite sure why I follow her, because it frustrates me so...
Speaking of supplements, I can tell you that I most likely will not be buying any more collagen powder. I cannot seem to find a medium what it mixes well in. Horn suggested using a blender, but if I have to use a blender, then I won't use the powder. Too many dishes to clean afterwards! I've tried a few things to mix it with:
So unless I see a major improvement in hair, I'm not buying more. I'll finish what I have though.
Taking this week off of weight training too, I think. Monday and Tuesday are the only normal days I have this week. OK, I'm calling myself out on this: Donkey cannot even do 5 minutes devoted to weights????? (Just like that Facebook lady I talked about up above!)
I was chopping up (with an axe) large branches that fell in the backyard from the last 2 storms we had, and hurt my back. I got most of it done before I decided to start listening to my back and rest. How foolish of me!!! Have I already forgotten how AWFUL it was the last time I hurt my back? I think I caught myself in time, though, because this morning, only my arms felt that muscle ache, and my back felt fine during my morning bike ride. Thank goodness for recumbent bikes.
Good health is everything. Can't buy it, and once it's gone (whether temporary or permanent), everything changes.
Progress as of today: 59 lbs lost so far, only -9 lbs to go!
Life is give and take...don't be so hard on yourself for not doing the weights...i have the same problem with cardio...but i will DEF get it in today!
glad you are in better spirits....don't force the collagen.
http://www.poppiesandpapayas.com/2016/03/the-collagen-latte.html
Thank goodness for dreams about McDonalds because it sure has been a sad and stressful time for Donkey.
So, I've been very frustrated/angry/sad/defeated about life in general. But then, to add to that, my step-father's brother (Uncle John) passed away last week. So last weekend was his funeral, which suprisingly, seemed to hit me harder than my step-father's death, although I was not particularly close to Uncle John. At the funeral, though, there were a lot of stories about Uncle John and my step-father, so maybe that had something to do with it? Or perhaps because his passing was sudden, even though he had been sick for so long.
Then, I learned that one of my daughter's classmates committed suicide this week, and the funeral Mass is today. I'm not sure if I'm going. I didn't know this boy personally, but my daughter had a class with him, and would tell us stories about him at dinner. He was kind of a square peg in a town of round holes, so I really felt his pain in these stories. Also, he performed in several high school drama events, so I have seen him perform....
IDK, I'm so angry with the Catholic church (my faith) right now. I haven't been to Mass since December 2016. I'm not sure I can bring myself to do this. If my daughter wanted to go and would go, then I'd go with her, of course, but she has to work. I just don't know.
Then, to top eveything off, my beloved kitty cat has been in the final stages of renal failure for about 2 weeks. She doesn't seem to be in pain, but watching her decline (literally waste away) has not been easy, not to mention all of the clean-up that is involved, because she's no longer the tidy cat that she used to be. I don't especially want to put her down because she does not seem to be in pain, plus, the trauma of taking her to the vet would make her last moments in this world, scary and painful, and I do not want that for her, if it can be avoided.
When I weighed in this morning - successfully shedding all of the bloat from last week - I realized that next Saturday, there won't be a weigh-in because I'll be out of town visiting my mom. And while this is anticipated to be a happy trip, it's still quite stressful for me, as I am not a good traveler. Plus, my family dynamics are always a little touchy on the toxicity.
But the stress of the upcoming trip hasn't even hit me yet, because the day before we leave, I will miss a full, extra day of work to take my husband to the VA hospital for more medical evaluations. And that's not stressful either, right????
Thank you for letting me just get that out.
Progress as of today: 59 lbs lost so far, only -9 lbs to go!
A little brevity and humor to lighten up my mood:
So right after my last post, I was nominated as a Sparkpeople "Motivator of the Day"... Go figure, just when I'm at my lowest "I QUIT HUMANITY" point, THAT happens. Can't make this stuff up.
I had a dream earlier this week that I met up with Graindart and his wife at a McDonalds. My first thought was, "Oh boy, I'm going to get a double Quarter Pounder with cheese!" I ended up getting a chopped steak salad ("with REAL steak" - from McDonalds??) and Graindart got a protein shake. I couldn't tell you what he looked like, but he wore a grey t-shirt and dark grey athletic shorts. His wife though was a lovely person, who looked like a young Elizabeth McGovern (do a quick Google). Lovely lady who didn't seem to mind that the marathon route went through her kitchen, LOL...
Feeling a little better, I suppose. Regardless, I've stayed on track - with the exception of the weight training for this week.
Purchased a container of collagen powder to see if it will help my skin and hair. I added it to my oatmeal breakfast (1/2 cup, 1/4 cup of walnuts, 1 TBSP of vanilla protein powder, mixed with water) and it changed the consistency of the oatmeal, so I won't do that again. I'm thinking of adding it to either Greek yogurt or a cold protein shake. I was advised to try adding it to my coffee, but if that doesn't work, I don't want to throw out my coffee! (That's a big sin in my house: we don't waste coffee!)
I have a 28 day supply of collagen, so we'll see where I'm at near the end of November. I won't have any collagen when I go visit my mom in Vegas next week.
Progress as of today: 57 lbs lost so far, only -7 lbs to go!
Everything in your dream sounded ok, except for one glaring mistake. If you see me at McDonald's, I'll be holding a bag of fries (small if on-plan, super-sized if off-plan).
and i LOVE LOVE that the marathon ran straight thru her kitchen!!!!!!!! perfect place to load up on some carbs during the run!
if you want to get on track with weight training, you'll have to plan it in, somehow...
...i have the same issue with fitting in cardio runs / bike rides...seems to not be enough downtime / exercise time balance.
nice job staying on track :)
if you add the collagen to your coffee, you may want to BLEND it in using a blender...to make a "keto style" coffee.
Today was another painful day, emotionally... but life goes on, I suppose.
I had initially decided to cut back on weight training until today, but have decided to give myself the entire week off. I'm still doing cardio - to help relieve the physical effects of this stress/depression and to preserve my sanity, whatever that means these days...
I guess what has me really bothered is that the recent course of events has me re-evaluating who I let into my life, and realizing that, in order to preserve my own morals, that I now need to be more selective with my friendships and who I spend my time with, and how.
This includes EVERYONE.
And I hate that it has to be this way, but I'm DONE.
Progress as of today: 57 lbs lost so far, only -7 lbs to go!
When you feel up to it, i'd like to understand more about what you are writing, about your selectivity and friendships. I hope you do not mean the ones here?
I'd like to understand why morals are involved as most friendships shouldn't (usually) have to fall to the wayside over morals and when they do it's gotta be usually a big deal...
I'd like to give my opinions more, but not sure exactly what you are fully writing about and the personal situations involved.
I am sorry you aren't feeling like your more typical Donkey ways!
Nothing to say, just letting you know we're here and reading your posts.
RE-EVALUATING EVERYTHING.
I cannot remember the last time I felt this sad and hopeless.
I need to isolate, re-evaluate, and re-organize my priorities.
Progress as of today: 57 lbs lost so far, only -7 lbs to go!
try not to let yourself turn into a downward spiral and i think you do need to do exactly what you are doing - isolate, re-evaluate and reorgainize.
if it's any consolation, i have used this weekend to do that for much of the 3 days i'm off. today is a down day too...to finally cook, bake those brownies (keto) for the first time...and gather my thoughts.
remember that you ARE in total control of yourself. and keep on focusing on the things that you can change, move and work to accomplish if you know what i mean. keep striving. you've got this!
Yesterday was emotionally difficult, today was even harder... starting with an awful weigh- in.
Progress as of today: 57 lbs lost so far, only -7 lbs to go!
also, i'm sorry your cat's health is not optimal but you have taken such wonderful care of her and i hope you will continue to be a wonderful "feline mom" in the future!
did the boss let you go into work late? i'm sure? i hope you begin to feel better soon... do you have today off?
Just taking a few minutes for ME and logging in to DD to comment. I could have spent this time doing weights, but I will do that tonight, maybe. I think I can spare the 5 minutes towards minimal but mandatory weight training, LOL...
I'm feeling a bit sad this morning. Not AT ALL looking forward to this stupid birthday breakfast thing. My hubby was kind enough to cook up the sausages I'm bringing... Some of the sadness, I'm sure, is situational, some of it is fatigue, some of it is dread (from the breakfast) and some of it is hormonal.
I haven't mentioned this here, but my cat is ailing and getting ready to go over the Rainbow Bridge. Today seems like it might be a better day for her. She has lost a lot of weight and drinks way too much water. We got a diagnosis a couple of years ago that she was in the early stages of renal failure, for which there is no cure. There are things we could do to prolong her life, but that would just make her remaining time here in this world very miserable. We really thought she only had about 6 more months, so she's been doing pretty well for another 1.5 years, until recently...
My main goal for her is to make her remaining time with us as comfortable as possible, and letting her know how much she is loved by us all.
The dinner plans with mom tomorrow have changed. We are meeting her for brunch -- I will probably go into work late, if the boss will let me (because Queen Bee has already decided that she will take the day off, for a long holiday weekend). So I will be able to make it a lighter meal out, and also get in the evening exercise bike ride, or chair yoga with the husband.
Progress as of today: 60.5 lbs lost so far, only -10.5 lbs to go!
sorry i didn't comment well these past few days...it was a challenge to get into after DD went down and weekends i'm always all over the place. having this extra day home i'm glad i can also catch up with you folks!....will add to this comment in a few minutes... :)
Yes, I am logging in on DD on my laptop this morning, instead of rushing off to work! This is my ME time and I'm not giving it up to some job where I'm not appreciated by my boss, my clients, and my coworkers.
I've been inspired lately:
So we'll see what today brings.... Now, unfortunately, I do need to logoff and go to work. Have a good day, everyone!
Progress as of today: 60.5 lbs lost so far, only -10.5 lbs to go!
remember not to let the crazy job crap get to you so much....it is what pays the bills and there is this type of crud at any job....
one person in particular at my job has rubbed me in completely the wrong way now...i have lost my total respect for him.
so it offers some change in the room automatically ...and it does it little by little getting brighter which i like. i'd have liked something that gets much brighter and may even spend MORE MONEY now that i think about it on getting something better now.
i am spending a large chunk of money this year on making my home more of a home with amenities that will make my work life and life in general easier.
from all the gym equipment which i'm SO satisfied with...to a good daylight alarm clock...
i am trying to give myself the best opportunity to improve physically and feel good during the winter. it's sooooo nice to come home from work and NOT leave the apt to go out to the gym and drive there. it's a better deal to come home and stay home :) just trying to simplify and make things better for a happier and healthier life. especially since getting up around 5:30am is also getting up in the dark!
I'm posting through my phone, which I do not like doing.
Not saying who, but 2 people at work have decided that we're having a breakfast bash on Thursday to celebrate the boss' birthday. I HATE casseroles, and 2 certain coworkers are bringing breakfast casseroles. I was assigned meat. So I will be bringing sausage links.
As you may recall, my stepfather passed away in January after a long battle with liver cancer. Saturday, his brother died... after a long battle with esophageal cancer. So my mom, brother, and (half) sister are coming to Illinois for the service on Saturday.
So this has been on my mind...
I had planned to try some keto baking this weekend. Now that probably won't happen. Also, no evening bike ride on Friday, and will be eating out Friday night with mom. No hopes for a satisfactory weigh-in on Saturday.
I had an epiphany that I really want to focus more of my life on my health and happiness.
Progress as of today: 60.5 lbs lost so far, only -10.5 lbs to go!
you can still have a good weigh-in. when you go out to eat, you can order healthy things that still taste good as long as you go somewhere that has that option.
i thought those keto brownies looked mad awesome too....
is your family coming in on friday or saturday?
are you sure you cannot do a bike ride Friday?
On Friday, I will have my morning leisurely bike ride while I watch the news, but I also like/need to unwind at the end of the day with another ride, to work out the stress. So it is not as though I won't have ANY exercise. Maybe I can get in a longer walk at lunchtime...
It's all about the stress management, lately.
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i'm glad you found a spot to dump your collagen! :) woohoo! it's a healthy!
next, sorry about your kitty. she's in a better place now, thankfully! i do hope you will be a kitty mom again because you show them the love and care they need.
also, i wanted to tell you, i'm contemplating a cat. however, with my inability to know what the future holds with work, it seems i cannot get one?
should i wait till i know what's happening in 2020?
or should i get one and possibily have to give it to someone else and/or give it to a shelter then?
BearCountryGG on 10/17/2018:
Losing a pet is so hard, but you seem to be dealing with it as well as can be expected...…...you knew it was coming and that does help a little....but I remember the sadness when we lost well loved pets.....so I hesitate to get another.
Yes, I told everyone that we're taking a break from getting another family member, and we will enjoy the remaining kitty, Boo (who has decided that she really only belongs to my daughter) for a bit.
BearCountryGG on 10/17/2018:
This morning my oldest son is facing the last couple of days on his beautiful large poodles life.....Jester isn't eating or going to the bathroom....he's been seeing this coming for a while...and now a couple of people are going there today to say goodbye to him......we are sad for Jester and son T...this is the absolute worst and saddest part of having pets.
I'm so sorry to hear this. I agree, it's the worst part :(
happy-1 on 10/17/2018:
I 100% believe we all meet up on the other side. God wouldn't stick us without our furkids for eternity.
Amen - I believe this too. I don't think the next phase is anything like what we read or imagine it to be.
Maria7 on 10/18/2018:
So sorry to hear about your precious kitty. Take care and do something special for yourself, even if a mug of hot coffee and some relaxation.