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Donkey - Tuesday May 01, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

Happy May!  Yes, I weighed in today just to monitor my weight throughout the month.  I have another challenge going on in Gmail.  I don't really fit in with the group, but the homework assignments make me think.  Anyway, today's weigh-in was the same as it was on Saturday:  133.5 --- So I won't chanage my tracker.


Very warm here in Chicagoland -- yes, even us way out in the northwest suburbs!  

Establishing the drinking-ice-water-during-dinner habit went much better today.  In fact, it would have been perfect had we not been celebrating, belatedly, my son's birthday, with Oreo Blizzard ice cream cake for dessert.

I almost forgot the water at dinner, but got up and made myself an 8 ounce glass with ice.  Drank that, filled it up again.  Got towards the end of the meal and stretched it out by getting up for another cup, which I finished with the last bites of my meal.  No seconds, felt full, well done.

But then came the cake, and of course I had to have a slice - yes, I did.  I know it wasn't really an obligation, and my choice, but I was prepared for this all day, so be it.

I seem to do OK with ice cream indulgences, believe it or not.  The scale either doesn't move or actually goes down. Go figure, right?  So I've given up trying to understand ice cream.

Went for a brief walk outside after dinner -- 25 minutes?  That's another habit I'm trying to (re-)establish this month.

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 05/01/2018:
It got warm here today too....great walking weather right now!!!!

horn_of_plenty on 05/02/2018:
happy belated bday to your son...!

weather is nice and sun is out longer...wonderful. i've been adding in the walking also :) i wanted to get involved more with running but just doing more walking has proved most beneficial at the moment!

The running i'm working on but still not in my work week routine...soon..

happy-1 on 05/02/2018:
What kind of challenge? Happy belated birthday

Donkey on 05/02/2018:
I'm not sure -- and I'm not even sure how long it's for. It's hosted by a lady who sells Advocare products. It's supposed to be accountability, recipes, goal sharing, etc. Today is day 2 and I think the leader has already run out of steam.

happy-1 on 05/02/2018:
Augh.... MLM healthcare products...

Ironically people do lose weight because their distributor takes so much time and energy to support them to keep them buying... just don't sign up or buy the business to "save money" on product. I'll go in on a lifestyle blog with you before I would see you do that. Please, please, please. I've seen the inside of these companies.

Donkey - Monday Apr 30, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

Very short on time - my son is coming home tonight!!!

I wanted to document that I think I'm on to something here with this drinking more more water, cold water, during meals.  I catch myself forgetting to do it several times during a meal. Yesterday, I took seconds instead of drinking more water.  I realized it once I had put the meat on my plate.  I probably could have saved it for tomorrow, but ate it instead.  Didn't do so well at dinner tonight either.  Did OK with it at lunch....  Hard to do when I eat lunch at my desk *sigh*

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 04/30/2018:
You will get the hang of it!

graindart on 04/30/2018:
It'll be good to see him again, even if it's not exactly how you wanted it to happen right now.

happy-1 on 05/01/2018:
He'll bounce back double trouble. He's half you and you've got twice the grit of anyone I know,

happy-1 on 05/01/2018:
(And btw I bought myself a giant steel tumbler with a lid that keeps ice cold all day and keep it filled and I drink way more water now!!!

happy-1 on 05/01/2018:
Btw I heard back from one of the recipients of my any soldier care packages and I will write her again. Sending toiletries this time.

horn_of_plenty on 05/01/2018:
if you eat at your desk, possibly still get up and walk outside for 10 minutes!

Happy Homecoming to your son!!!!! Keep him positive, he can go far!!!!!!! He should look for a job, asap for now, i'd say..and perhaps still work out...or if he doesn't look for a job, he should at least look up when applications are for the civil service type jobs.

horn_of_plenty on 05/01/2018:
keep us updated on your son!!!! i'm happy you will see him! he has nothing to be upset over, he's still a young "kid"

Donkey - Sunday Apr 29, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

 My dinner "date" with my husband turned out to be a disaster, but I did learn something about my eating habits that I believe will be very helpful to me in the future.

I don't drink nearly enough water during my meals.  And not flavored or carbonated water, but just plain (ice) water.  If I were to start each meal by drinking more cold water  (cold - by either the temperature of the tap or an ice cube), and took drinks of water between each bite, I would fill up without eating as much.  This might sound like "DUH" to you, and I think we all know this recommended habit, but it wasn't until last night when the lightbulb went off and I realized, "Hey, I *don't* do this, and I *could* do this, and it *would* help."

Also, I came to the realization that, during the week, when I come home late, and we're eating dinner at 6:30p, I rush through eating -- and thus, eat more, because I don't give my body the time to feel full naturally -- so that I will have more free time available before going to bed.  THAT is counterproductive.

Bottom line, I eat too much, and now I can see what in my habits makes that so.  This week, I'm going to challenge myself to consciously change this habit and see where it takes me.

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 04/29/2018:
I love those AHA moments....they usually make things so clear..so that we can make choices instead of just reacting. Apparently it takes 20 minutes for food to reach the stomach....I once read a book about French women and how they eat high fat foods and still stay thin.....they eat painfully slowly.....and spend a long time savoring small bites....they linger over tea and wine and a croissant and cookies ( they call them biscuits)...I love the idea....but something in me says...EaT it...before someone takes it away...LOL...I have no idea where that came from.

horn_of_plenty on 04/29/2018:
I do same as you with eating it's rushed - drinking water helps yes !!!

Hmmm keep on you sound good and I hope you continue your relationship always with your daughter !

I may go visit my parents next weekend :-) being with them I prefer lately to my friends lol but I also miss them :)

Donkey - Saturday Apr 28, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

No change in weight.  Better than a gain.  This is a good number, I guess.

I'm feeling very frustrated with everything right now.  

 MORNING EDIT:  Decided to go for a walk outside, to get myself feeling centered and right with the world.  Unfortunately, I got stuck in the middle of the opening ceremonies for little league baseball.  This, in my opinion, is the epitome of what is wrong with our society right now.  But rather than dwell on that, I just thanked my lucky stars that I'm done with that phase.  I know I've said it here before, but I'm so glad that my kids opted out of organized sports early.  I would encourage my daughter (who is athletically gifted) to try out, just for the experience, and she would tell me, "They don't want you to try out unless you're serious about winning."  Wow.  Again, the epitome of what's wrong with our society.

Anyway, got some stuff done, including laundry and running my water bottle through the dishwasher.  I have a few more things planned, for either today or tomorrow, but want to check with my daughter first, to see if she's willing to do any of them with me and if so, when.  

Hey, Horn:  Is this me being dependent on others to do things myself? (Yep)

 AFTERNOON EDIT:  Checked in with my daughter and accomplished the 1st thing I wanted to try, which was to go to our park to try out the new outdoor fitness equipment. This was something that I didn't want to try alone the first time.  So it's like gym equipment but outside.  The machines are desiged to use your own body weight as resistance.  All of the upper body machines work for me, but I'm too short and disproportionate to use the leg machines (quad extension and hamstring curls).  And the equipment is not under a shelter, so during the hot, sunny days, it won't be useful, but I'll probably be at work anyways, LOL...  

My daughter agreed to go shopping with me tomorrow afternoon, so that we can get bags of salt for the water softener, and then I would do grocery shopping and she would visit her friends.  I do not need her to go grocery shopping with me, but I do need someone to go with me to lift the heavy bags of salt.  (Mr. Donkey cannot do this, nor can I. So sad...)

I am taking 2 large bags of clothes to the church tonight, and I invited asked the hubby if he wanted to go out to dinner afterwards, which of course I knew he would say yes.  So while not very diet friendly, that is my plan for a nice evening.  

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 04/28/2018:
Breathe...it will all work out. Maybe you are at a plateau....and your body is content there.

bearcountrygg on 04/28/2018:
Love the idea of your park...I wish we had one of those around here.

horn_of_plenty on 04/29/2018:
To answer your question above - NO!

I think it's wonderful you can do errands with. Daughter !

It's so nice to do some things with others than to be in your head all day - I hope once again to find that friend or mate that I can do some things with again!

She is your family and it's better she do some things with you than sit home on her booty. In back of my head, I DO wish my parents expected MUCH more of me with errands and assisting and even shopping with them on weekends when I was a kid and up to age 18. I got away with murder and the laziness persists now . So yeah I think it's great she is with you and social with you! Wonderful.

horn_of_plenty on 04/29/2018:
That outdoor park equipment is nice and like you in the summer I'll go there prob early so I can workout when it's not 100 degrees!

Also going there in evening after work itnwont be too hot!

Donkey - Friday Apr 27, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

Another 10 hour day in the books, folks...  My boss even admitted that yesterday and today were brutal.

We're expecting our son to return on Monday, since he did not return today.  It will be good to see him, but I do wish he had been successful with his endeavor.  I really hope he tries again.  And of course, it will be an adjustment to have him living with us again.

Although I did not weight train this week, I did use my evenings to do nice things for myself.  One night I gave myself a hair treatment.  Another night I did a facial treament.  I'd like to do my nails tonight --- they are all about the right length that I was aiming for ("sporty short" I guess is what it's called).

Tomorrow is weigh day, but I have no hope, now that I've come to the realization that even though I eat very healthy (95% of the time), I just eat too much. 

And so even with the impending wedding on May20th, I still haven't really done much towards improving.  I know there is still time to improve for the wedding -- and definitely time to think of May goals... but still, geez!  

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 04/27/2018:
Saw your post about your son's clothes. Men's clothes are in high demand at food banks.

bearcountrygg on 04/28/2018:
Lots of new changes....just try to relax.

horn_of_plenty on 04/29/2018:
Support your son and go over options for him....he can work a decent job and live at home and maybe he should apply to the other service jobs we spoke of ?

Also you talking about doing your nails - I do mine now :) I do them at home with a file and cut when necessary and clear polish :) big improvement! Thank you.

I had been cutting them too short and picking them bc I was stressing at new job and now they are better and grown out and that personally feels much better. Truth is, it's good to care about your looks. Self presentation.

The above being said, I need to improve my footwear selection but don't yet bc I prefer comfort to heels lol and my work clothes - I feel I will start to wear jeans less I think and try to dress better too - like you did - but honestly it's $$$$ so I'll hold off .... as long as I am neat I think the clothes can come later / once in awhile.

But back to my point - doing nice treatments for yourself is wonderful and will make you feel good :)

Donkey - Thursday Apr 26, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

Did not get a lunch break today, so no midday walking. Sat at my desk, because I had to stick around for a closing.

So I ate at my desk. And around 2:15p that familiar craving came by. This time, I had my little container of 13 almonds and 33 chocolate chips, with a reheat of the coffee I had leftover from the morning.

And after that, I was pretty much satisfied for the rest of the day until around 6p, still at work... Didn't leave until almost 6:30p...

Tomorrow I'm getting up early again, like I did on Tuesday. Daughter has to be up early to be at the school for a band field trip. So I will stay up, exercise, and get to work early. Hopefully, I will be able to leave around 5p... on a Friday. Please!

Just now finishing up a short bike ride in the basement, as a substitute for the walk I missed at lunch today.

But I learned something important. Sometimes a little sugar treat goes a long way. BUT --- the caveat is that I can't eat the whole bag or box. I don't trust myself enough not to have an emotional point of weakness, where I end up eating everything. I often struggle with the fantasy of being able to eat it all.

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 04/27/2018:
Now after many years of trying to eat it all....I'm finally accepting that when I eat it all...frequently...I also have an awful stomachache....now...I just remember that feeling....and it helps .

Donkey on 04/27/2018:
You'd think that would stop me, but it doesn't.

horn_of_plenty on 04/29/2018:
Yes I find small sugar treats helpful also - I can workout better etc and though I am not sure if they are necessary but I will say that it seems sugar is semi necessary in just thinking of it that we take food and digest it into energy like sugar -

I'm not saying sweets are necessary but carbs are IMO

Donkey - Wednesday Apr 25, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

In spite of being caught up at work yesterday, I still stayed until almost 6:30p.

Sure enough, at 2:16p, started getting that craving. I came prepared today. I had 7 almonds and most of a large apple. In my container of almonds, I brought 33 chocolate chips, at the suggestion of Bear, which is 77 calories, according to the package. But the apple and almonds worked. Then I had raw vegetables and a cheese stick at around 4p. So I consider this a success!

Certain truths became evident to me today, though. I am stuck at this right because of what I eat, i.e I eat too much! Also, if I hadn't made time to change my habits, I could easily weigh 200 lbs., which is where I almost was when I started this journey, this time around.

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

graindart on 04/25/2018:
Portion control has always been my demise. I don't want 1 slice of pizza, I want half the pizza. I don't want 7 almonds, I want the entire package. I don't want 33 chocolate chips, I want an entire king size chocolate bar. I don't want a cookie, I want to eat the entire package.

I've gotten better at portion control over the past year, but there are still some foods that I pretty much have to avoid because I know that I have no self control (cookies mainly).

Good job on coming prepared with a plan of attack for your snack cravings.

bearcountrygg on 04/26/2018:
Yup...me too.....putting large portions on a plate because I would PLAN to eat them...and in actuality....wasn't hungry enough to eat them...but I WANTED them...we can alter that thinking...we can change old habits.....writing these things out here really helps me see patterns.

horn_of_plenty on 04/26/2018:
i came to the realization that i was eating TOO OFTEN at work in the mornings and that i need to cut it down to less times in the morning..

like you, if i didn't learn how to be full on less calories, healthy alternatives, i'd be overweight also.

that being said, lately i find that adding more fat into my diet has helped to lessen cravings !!!

Maria7 on 04/26/2018:
You and me, both! We may not weigh what we would preferr to weigh but we don't weigh as much as we once did! Smile!

horn_of_plenty on 04/26/2018:
you should be soooo darn proud of yourself so far, to keep your weight at this lower level...we all get complacent (especially in winter as exercise levels decrease which can lead to a little weight gain) and it DOES TAKE EFFORT and an effort to remember how hard we once worked to lose that weight at first. i'm glad i did it...and now i'm back to feeling better like i can keep on! and get stronger again!

Donkey - Tuesday Apr 24, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

Yesterday was such a disaster of a day at work, that I vowed to do better by me today.  I set my alarms much earlier for a start.  I usually have 2 alarms: one that goes off at 5:30a and then one that goes off at 5:45a.  Then I spend over 20 minutes trying to convince myself that it's worth getting out of bed.  In the process of this conversation with myself, I stretch my back out to release some of the tension I get overnight.

Today, I set my alarms for 5:15a and 5:30a and 5:45a.  So I turned off my 2nd alarm, stretched out my back, and got up before the 5:45a alarm went off.  I was dressed and downstairs to work out by 5:55a.  Excellent.  Finished working out at around 7:10a and got ready for work.  Left the house at 7:45a and made it to work a whole hour early at 8:02a.

Worked my butt off all day until 6:14p.  Came home, had dinner, and now I'm going to get ready for bed.  I'm going to have to put weight-training aside for a little bit -- didn't do legs yesterday, didn't do upper body today...  IDK I might try to do legs tonight, but I'm really tired from the extra long day.

Anyway - I AM CAUGHT UP A WORK.... at least for today.

I came to realize the following today:

At around the 2 o'clock hour, I start getting these really strong cravings for fatty carbs, usually sweet (chocolate) but sometimes salty (chips).  Even though I finished lunch less than an hour ago.  My lunch today was substantial - around 560 calories - with plenty of protein, fiber, and plant-based carbs (beans).  I thought I was going to go out of my mind with this craving.  I had 3 choices today:  sweet potato, grapefruit, or raw vegetables.  I settled for raw vegetables with ranch dressing (for the fat).  That carried me through 3:30p and then I felt OK.  Not really satisfied, but really full.

What can I do about this?  Yesterday, I had microwave popcorn (light).  That was the last packet, and I'm not buying more.  I've found, in the past, that if I start with the chocolates, it's REALLY hard to stop at just 1 -- it usually carries over to about 4.  Then I feel like crap for the rest of the afternoon.  I have hot chocolate that I could make, but that's not eating, that's drinking, and that doesn't work.  Sugar free candy doesn't work. I'm drinking plenty of water throughout the day, and I suppose I could chug down some more but that's not really satisfying.

I'm sure this is stress related, because at around 2pm is when I start to realize that I've got to address any deadlines that haven't already been met during the day. (I can't really tackle these sooner, unless they come to fruition on their own, because I have until the end of the business day to send out notices.)  Chewing gum sometimes helps but not always...

Maybe it's just something that I have to put up with and push through, just by the nature of what it is.  I don't know.  Half the battle is being able to identify our weaknesses, and so I'm halfway there.  Just wish I had a solution to help me get through it.

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 04/24/2018:
I think you will figure it out......like you said.....you are half way there.

bearcountrygg on 04/25/2018:
I remember many years ago...some at WW would measure out 1 Tablespoon of chocolate chips...and eat them one at a time...I don't know the calories...but it apparently did allow them to eat them slowly.

horn_of_plenty on 04/25/2018:
for me, food is certainly a habit and delay tactic...like if i have work, my brain automatically focuses on what i'm eating or if i'm hungry...trying to overcome some of this for this year.

bearcountrygg on 04/25/2018:
WELL......I don't think I have used food as a delay tactic too much in the past......but I do use a delay tactic that works really well for me at night when I can't sleep and I'm tempted to get up.......I tell myself that I can get up if I want...but if I do...I have to scrub the kitchen floor....funny how that puts me right back to sleep...FAST! I know this has nothing to do with food...but maybe you can figure out something else that works the same way.....non food related...like...commit yourself to working on work...for 10 more minutes...and then you can get up and go get a glass of water...or a cup of coffee or tea....or you will switch jobs for a minute and instead shred a paper or something..just to get away and move around a bit.

Donkey - Monday Apr 23, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

I can see that after today, I'm going to have to come up with an approach for this real estate season, to help me maintain a healthy work-life balance.  Today I knew as soon as I woke up that I couldn't wait for the day to be over.  And sure enough, I struggled all day long, trying to keep up with emails and keeping the files straight.  I didn't feel confident enough to leave until 6:15p.  At least I do get paid overtime, so there's no great loss without some gain.  And the extra money will be very helpful coming into the home stretch this month.  (finger's crossed - hoping for an improved financial situation come June)

I cannot do the low carb thing that my husband is doing (as a result of being busted with eating pizza for lunch).  At around 2pm my sugar levels drop and my stress levels rise, and I can't function.  I think if I were doing something else in the aftenoon, I would be able to pull through.  Today, I had a 100-calorie bag of popcorn -- promptly burnt most of it in the microwave but that didn't stop me from enjoying it.  BUT I think for the remainder of the week, I will use sweet potatoes (halves), and see if that does the trick.  I think the problem was that I didn't have any meat, and the plant-based protein I had wasn't enough to sustain me.  Meat tends to just sit in my stomach like a rock.

So today was a not a good day, living wise, but overall, life is pretty good.  But I *do* definitely have to put limitations on my time at work.  It might have to be working until 6pm..... I hate that.  And I don't want to come in really early because that's when I exercise.  

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 04/23/2018:
Corn is what we feed farm animals to fatten them up... seeet potatoes are super yum

Donkey on 04/24/2018:
Good point - I had forgotten that...

happy-1 on 04/23/2018:
And try pea protein!

Donkey on 04/24/2018:
What? I'll have to do some research on that. IDK if it tastes like peas... :-/

bearcountrygg on 04/24/2018:
The brain needs carbs, the muscles need protein and the joints need good oils......I think we suffer when we don't get enough...maybe a good multivitamin would help...but there is no better medicine than food............hope you have a better day today.

Donkey on 04/24/2018:
More on this in my diary today (4/24)...

horn_of_plenty on 04/24/2018:
Give yourself the balance yes.

Donkey on 04/24/2018:
Trying -- I need to set boundaries, I think.

happy-1 on 04/24/2018:
No it's super bland. More like rice flour. It's a great hormone-neutral plant protein source.

Donkey - Sunday Apr 22, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 133.5

Not feeling particularly energetic or spectacular today, but I still had an AWESOME cardio performance this morning, weight training session, and accomplishments in yard work!  Sunny and warmer weather -- not actually warm, but warmer at upper 50's -- really does me well.  

I already did my upper body weights today, and I used my heavier weights.  I'm going to try to use the heavier weights this week, for upper body.  I only use my own body weight with my lower body -- not so much so that I don't bulk up - but rather because of my hips, knees, and back.  I took a "before" picture of my tree trunk legs.  I want to see where I'm at by the time the wedding comes on May 20th.  I remembered yesterday how I was going to use the wedding as a "goal" event, but that disappeared after the bridal shower, as I came away feeling sad, rather than empowered and motivated like I thought I would.  That I remembered that I could still use the wedding as a "goal" kind of cheered me up yesterday, actually.

Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 04/22/2018:
Goals can be very powerful if we use them!!! It's a good goal.

Maria7 on 04/22/2018:
Hope you have a good day and I know you are happy that you are having sunny and warmer weather.

graindart on 04/22/2018:
I have to have goal dates to look forward to. Otherwise I don't have anywhere near as much motivation. I sometimes meet the goal by the date and sometimes don't, but it does help keep me motivated. Even when I'm not to goal by a determined date, chances are I'm further along towards it than I would've been if I hadn't had the date / goal set.

Horn_of_plenty on 04/22/2018:
i wish you wouldn't hate your legs as much as you do....are they full of muscle?

if not - remember this: weights will NOT cause women to bulk up. So if you able, weights can be used at times. However, there's many exercises that you don't even need them for...so you are probably more than ok with whatever you are doing.

I dislike some things my legs a little too...they have no muscle. but, due to my persistence in doing lots of exercises that i don't even enjoy, certain things are getting better :)

Donkey, it's up to you to want to make yourself happy. It's not easy. I face a lot of the same issues with social events. But remember this, you ARE in charge of your own happiness. I totally think you should make the wedding a goal :)

And then, besides that, remember that it's one point in your life...and not the end all be all....but do your best and if you do your best, you can be happy about it.

I also have the wedding in August, and i have a goal to look good there, too.

Right now, i'm not going on any special diet and may not even closer in August...my goals this year are to get my cardio back to par and i'm thinking i may lose a few pounds doing that....

anyways, we both know fad diets aren't the best...so i wouldn't recommend you go crazy just to have weight come back on afterwards? so, instead, i recommend you keep on doing your thing...and yes keep the wedding as your goal of the "why" you do what you do know. I agree with Gains...goal dates help immensely.

and after the wedding, you have to pick a new reason "why."

actually, with most of my exercise, i've always had a reason "why."

horn_of_plenty on 04/23/2018:
we had that same sunny and warmer weather as you...so helpful for being able to stay outside longer :)

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