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Donkey - Saturday Jul 28, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 139.0

I survived my company: my mom and my sister and then my inlaws -- all at the same time. And not only that, but Husband wasn't home because he had unplanned overtime at work. (Which left ME alone to entertain his folks AND mine.)

I survived pizza, birthday cake and now I'm having a small glass of red wine to relax. I can't believe that I walked away from this experience and didn't feel more dysfunctional than I usually do.

Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 07/28/2007:
I believe the reason for your success was that you knew what to expect. you went into the situation ready...possibly prepared for the worst. Because you didn't go in with unusually high hopes is why it worked out so well. It is good to be logical, which you were in this case...

I appreciate you also trying to be logical with me! I think my plan to go back to school to be a nurse is probably a good one...i've been speaking to some friends that are nurses. I am enjoying performing...well, not enjoying performing in the orchestra that i play with. It's been seven years...i can't say that all this education is a waste...it was a learning experience...where i have learned that it is ok to choose a different path. I think. ?

Donkey - Friday Jul 27, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 139.0

My weight is up again, and my motivation is down. I've decided to try something new to "mix it up" a bit, and see how it goes.

I've decided to start eating every 2 hours. It will keep my metabolism stoked and hopefully it will keep overeating away, because there's no need to overeat at one meal, because there will be a snack in 2 hours.

I decided to try this, rather than to change up my cardio. I'm pretty happy with my cardio right now, considering that I am limited by time and weather. I'm going to add a little more upper body weight training too. But after 2 days of big dinners, I've decided that something's got to change.

So we'll see how it goes!

Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

lafemme_loca on 07/27/2007:
Thanks for the advice... to answer your question... he doesn't put himself in my inbox... only the computer does... so I don't know if he has checked his email or not or stopped using the service or if he just isn't interested in me... *sigh* but I just sent him an email asking about if ppl meet up for dinner before going to the dance hall... so we will see if he responds... :-) *fingers crossed*

Donkey - Thursday Jul 26, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 134.5

Well, I have not been doing too well with my goal of getting in 2 workouts 3x a week. In fact, as I mentioned in a previous post, I do not seem to be very serious about losing weight at all!

I think I need a change, in both workout and diet. Maybe my lack of motivation comes from a need for change.

I would like to start a personal challenge for myself, but I'm not sure how to go about doing this. What would my challenge/goal be? See, I'm just feeling a little directionless right now.

Well, OK, how's this for a challenge? Not only do I have my own dysfunctional family coming to visit me on Saturday (mom, stepfather, half-sister), but Husband goes and invites HIS folks over for dinner that very same day! So not only do I have to deal with my own family manure, but the Inlaws' manure as well. Oh my but Donkey will need a drink. Fortunately, she has a nice bottle of red wine waiting for before, during and after.

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 9.5 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 07/27/2007:
whenever i am completely unmotivated or bored...i know it's time for a change! I don't know if i could do 2-3 more years in school just because it would be a ton of loans to pay back. I have no loans for all of my schooling up till now because my grandparents had a fund for both my sister and myself. My mom is truly unsupportive of any career change in anyway and has been even ruder and nastier than ever to me. i am completely lost and confused in this matter.

it seems we have similiar family situations!!!!! I wish you the very best tomorrow when family comes. If i leave any advice, it would be to not take anything personally and try to have fun.

MyJuneWedding on 07/27/2007:
stay strong Donkey, change is good, sometimes that unplanned break works well too! My motivation, I registered for our first ride and paid our entry fees, a tad under $100.00 for the two of us. I already planned out our long rides to build our milage, adding 10% to our long rides each Sunday up to the Sunday before ride day. We know in order for us to do this ride, we have to do those long rides to build our endurance. The registration is none refundable and who wants to throw $$$ away??? Oh yeah and I still owe hubby sit-ups for this week... UGH!!!

Donkey - Wednesday Jul 25, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 134.5

I realize now that I have wasted more than half a year with nothing to show for it. I'm essentially where I was in January, and I'm sick of it. Am I serious about losing weight or what? This is ridiculous, up/down, up/down, the same 5lb (give or take) over and over again.

Donkey must really get her act organized and decide IF she wants to achieve her goal and if so, WHAT she must do to get there.

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 9.5 lbs to go!

MyJuneWedding on 07/26/2007:
I hear you girl, I can talk the talk, but when it comes to follow up with the proper eating actions I am not making the grade... hugs girlie, we will get there!!!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 07/26/2007:
yup, i'm feeling your pain....i also feel like i have not progressed near as much as i wanted to in my overal physique and fitness. However, instead of being over just a half year's time like you, i've been keeping tabs on myself since probably the beginning of the school year at least. I'm working on it...let's support each other!!

biscottibody59 on 07/26/2007:
You at least are maintaining at a narrow range--not easy for me. But I know you're frustrated. Pick yourself up and see what you can change or how you can be a little more consistent and try again--I know you're not going to give up:-)

Since you asked, I'm going to start the countdown tomorrow or the next day--I just have to see where I'm at average-wise at this point and then make a/some goal/goals. I just got really fed up with how I make such awful choices--someone else should choose my food--haha! I can't seem to be very responsible. And alot of it comes down to sheer laziness. I'm out to change that!

Donkey - Tuesday Jul 24, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 134.5

I regret to say that I forgot to weigh in this morning. I got off to a late start --- once again, I could not get my butt out of bed early to get to the gym, so I was in bit of a rush to get going when I finally did get up.

I just finished a rather large dinner (I feel, although the only thing of real caloric value was the 8oz of salmon I had). The kids want to roast marshmallows and make 'Smores (graham cracker, piece of chocolate bar and marshmallow all squished together) in the fire pit tonight. My daughter likes to MAKE the 'smores but she doesn't like to EAT the 'smores. Ugh, what to do. I think I will put the ones she makes on a sheet of wax paper and freeze them. That way, I can enjoy them in moderation.

"In moderation" - ha ha ha!!! That's a good one, Donkey!

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 9.5 lbs to go!

Donkey - Monday Jul 23, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 134.5

I managed to get in a second workout today by going on a family bike ride. This would have been much better if we had been on bike trails in the country. What we rode on were paths that ride along the road. This is all and fine, except that very often, the trail just stops. (Ran out of funding to continue the path, I suppose.) So we would have to switch to sidewalk or road riding. This is not a problem for me or for Husband, but it made me a bit nervous to do with the kids. We all survived though.

I stayed up late reading Harry Potter 7 last night (I'm almost at the end!) so I had absolutely NO motivation to get up early and go to the gym this morning. I finally made it in around 9a, which is my usual time during the school year.

I have not made mention of this but the man at the front desk in the early morning kind of creeps me out. I'm sure he's only trying to be friendly, but he always calls me by my full first name. (For example, if my name were MaryAnn, but I preferred to be called Mary.) He'd be like, "Bye MaryAnn, take care!" I just cringe at my full name. Nobody but family calls me by it. Not even my Husband -- unless he's being a total donkey.

I mean, I'd even prefer this guy to say, "Hi Donkey!" Of course then people around us would think he was nuts, but I digress.

So now I've come to rather dread walking in/out of the gym when I go in early. He leaves at 9a. I can't complain to the manager, because I believe that this guy IS the manager. Perhaps I should redress the situation with him but I'd rather have as little to do with him as possible. Besides, Donkey is not particularly conversational before 9a anyway.

At any rate, I am wondering if this is the reason why I have not been very motivated to go to the gym earlier in the mornings now.

I hope to have a weigh in for tomorrow, although I had pasta for dinner, so I will probably be retaining a bit of water.

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 9.5 lbs to go!

biscottibody59 on 07/24/2007:
I'm somewhat familiar with Asperger's--I hope it's a situation for you where knowing what's going on helps more than not knowing.

Putting a plan (minutes/miles/days between jogging/running/walking) in a little notebook and then posting my progress in accomplishing the plan worked for me when I started out toward the goal of going from walking to jogging a full 20 min. Some days I just had to make myself go and it paid off.

Maybe the guy is calling out your name from your membership info and just doesn't know what to call you???

Have a good one!

Donkey - Saturday Jul 21, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 134.5

Just random thoughts tonight...

I don't know why I'm having a hard time maintaining a regular running program. Born To Cry, where are you? I need your running stories to get me motivated! (Actually, I just miss reading your entries. I hope all is well with you.)

My goal for the next 2 weeks is to get in a second workout at least 3 days a week.

Having trouble drinking 8 glasses of water a day minimum. I like to aim for 3 Liters a day; not happening. This is not good because when I don't drink enough water, everything else seems to fall apart.

I felt totally unmotivated to get up this morning. This has been an ongoing problem. I do not know if I am truly tired or if it's a depression issue. I just have an incredible time getting up out of bed. Cannot face the day. Feel tired.

Because I did not get out of bed on time, I missed my morning opportunity to go to the gym. I decided to mow the lawn and then do some pruning. I could have gone in the afternoon after Husband got home from work, but I opted to take my son for a bike ride outside instead. That was nice. He has improved SO MUCH with his bike riding skills. I'm proud of him.

In regards to the diagnosis of my son's assessment this week, I had not said much about it, as most of it we felt was poppycock due to the people doing the assessment. Most of what they have to say, I do not agree with, but I do agree with the diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome.

Tomorrow is the church picnic. Food food food....

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 9.5 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 07/23/2007:
I think its great you opted to go bike riding with your son: bonding time! I feel that unless adults have a early morning running schedule, it is difficult to get it in place because we always get bombarded with so much during the day. REally, the only people i know whos running schedules don't get interrupted are those who do it in the early morning. Personally, i couldn't do that unless i went to bed many hours earlier! Maybe it will fit into your schedule.

MyJuneWedding on 07/23/2007:
Donkey Donkey!!! First of tall thank you for your wonderful comment!! I love hearing from you!! Coolies about the bike ride, hubby and I are gearing up and it is steadily becoming a passion for us, that is a good thing!! Hope you had a good time at the picnic, lookig forward to hearing the update! Hugs!~

Donkey - Friday Jul 20, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 134.5

I realized yesterday that I have less than 10lb to go until I reach my goal (assuming I don't go and change my goal; you know how THAT goes...). However, today I ate more than I usually do, thanks to a dish (or two) of ice cream when we came home this evening.

So I have a mini-goal in mind for myself, to stay on track for the weekend and still have "less than 10lb" to lose come Monday morning.

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 9.5 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 07/21/2007:
Hey Donkey Donkey!!!!!!!!!! :)

You are so good to me. How come you always know exactly how to respond to my diary entries!? what you said yesterday knocked some good sense into me. thank you. I have learned from my experiences this week that hard work is what gets you someplace and that we always judge ourselves more than others do. however, it's true, i'm not the most talented when it comes to conducting.

sometimes i find you are too hard, negative, on yourself if you feel you committed some kind of terrible food sin. However, today, you made a good goal to counteract the ice cream you had. that is a good goal. this is the kind of thinking that will warrant you success. if we always think negatively about ourselves and our actions, we will begin to seriously feel that way. when that happens, we begin to care less about ourselves, our appearance, and the way we maintain our looks and bodies as well as the food we eat.

maria777 on 07/21/2007:
Wow! You are very close! Have a good day!

Donkey - Thursday Jul 19, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 134.5

Only good news to report tonight!

Not only did I manage to lose my vacation weight but also a couple of more pounds!

I/we survived the meeting with the assessment coordinator regarding my son's issues. I didn't hear anything that I didn't already know. But after making us wait for over 40 minutes to meet with the coordinator, we will NOT be doing ANY treatments through THAT organization, that's for sure!

I made it to the gym, and although I didn't have enough time to do weights, I got in an awesome workout on the elliptical.

Now I am going to enjoy a dinner with my little family and then maybe go down to the public library with my son for Chess Club. I plan on sleeping well tonight.

Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 9.5 lbs to go!

petaldew on 07/19/2007:
Im glad you made it through your meeting, you sounded like you were not looking foward to it.

hollybelle on 07/20/2007:
Glad you got through meeting. Good for you - not doing more those that organization. Look for someone you feel supported - not confronted - by!

biscottibody59 on 07/20/2007:
Congrats to you losing some more--keep up the good work!

Donkey - Wednesday Jul 18, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 136.0

No workout today. As a consolation, no lunch today either. Well, that's not entirely true. I had lunch but it ended up being a snack at 3p.

My schedule was completely thrown out the window today because I had to deal with my old house (that we have a contingency to sell at the end of August). I won't bore you with details but needless to say, it took up most of my day.

I could not exercise tonight because of the terrible rain storms we are experiencing at the moment. Otherwise, I would not be writing to you; I would be out riding my bike (I like to think, although dinner is sitting heavy in my stomach at the moment so I'm not so sure about what I'd actually be doing).

So my hope for tomorrow is plenty of exercise before taking the kids to yet another karate class at 10a. They test for the next level of belt on Friday night, so since we've been on vacation, we're trying to squeeze in as much practice as possible.

Tomorrow promises to be very stressful. After morning martial arts classes for the kids, we (Husband and I) have a concluding meeting with the people who assessed my son for learning disabilities way back in May. That process was completely devastating to me (to all of us, actually), and so I have no desire to hear what they have to say. Not that I don't have an open mind but rather that my son has made significant improvements in some aspects of his life, and so I don't think that what we contributed before necessarily holds true now. I also have severe reservations about the validity of the tests (i.e. they were not taken in their proper context) and I have a personal dislike for the people doing the assessing.

I apologize if I sound defensive. And I also apologize for going on and on about this. As you might guess, it weighs heavily on my mind and my heart. Normally, I might eat myself silly from the moment we got home (Sunday) until the day of the test. But I have managed not to do so, so far.

At any rate, I won't dwell on what "might happen" tomorrow and just live each moment as it comes. Perhaps I will arm myself with a Diet Coke before the meeting to help calm my nerves while listening to the testing lady tell me how crazy my son is and how awful it must be to live in my family. (I kid you not.)

I look forward to a calm evening tomorrow taking my son to Chess Club at our local public library.

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 11 lbs to go!

hollybelle on 07/19/2007:
I remember when you were going through that evaluation stuff in May. It's hard to know what to do when something like that happens. We hae gone through something like that in our home, too. I found in our situation seeking other professionals with (it turns out) differing opinions helped-and they are out there. The evaluators in some situation have one agenda and often it is not the child or the family, but the school or the system of some type. Don't know if you feel like going in another direction - but don't let so called experts decide when you're "done". Fight it. It's awful to have a child negatively labeled and it happens all too often. There are many types of "learners" - but our systems don't accomodate them. Some learn differently than "average" and average is all that our systems seem to be able to work with. I hope you find some peace with whatever happens. I will be thinking of you.

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