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Donkey - Wednesday Jan 10, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 128.0

Had a lovely lunchtime walk today - and tomorrow will be even warmer!  (Then the cold and snow comes back...)  I walked the whole lunch hour and then ate at my desk. 

Tried coffee flavored Kombucha today... I think I could get acquired to other flavors, but not the coffee flavor.  Too bitter, but I'm so glad I got the chance to try it for free!  

I really enjoy wearing more black at the office.  Cuts way down on my decision-making process in the morning. 

Spent most of my day listing to sitar music at my desk. I never realized how relaxing listening to the sitar is for me.

My husband had a lot of medical tests today.  His workplace knows now that he's not coming back to work.  I often feel that I'm a by-stander in my own life, just watching the changes rolling by and I'm quite helpless to interfere.

Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 01/10/2018:

Donkey - Tuesday Jan 09, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 128.0

I know that some of you have been having sleepy days lately, but I don't know what happend to me today:  woke up sooner than expected and had tons of energy (once I got out of bed).  I was able to finish my workout early, so I ran for a mile on the treadmill.  Adding a mile is something that I wanted to do as a 2018 goal, but then reconsidered, as it might not be something that's required EVERY day.

I am working on graduating from a protein shake breakfast to eating real food.  So I have substituted the 12 ounces of almond milk and scoop of protein, with 1/2 cup of oatmeal (not instant), 1/4 cup of walnuts, and 8 ounces of same almond milk.  Seems to be working for a weekday breakfast.  Weekends are different.

My lunchtime walk was wonderful!  Not only is Chicagoland getting a little warmer (feels like early Spring!), but I found a new street to walk down with lovely houses to look at and admire - like an entire new neighborhood to check out!

Later in the afternoon, one of our notoriously toxic clients came in, and I was so happy that all I had to do was greet her and ask her to have a seat.  After that, my other 2 co-workers got stuck dealing with her, and I got to leave -- on time!  I think I was smiling on my way out the door!  That is when I realized what effect toxic people have on my well-being. 

I get that we all have our quirks, every one of us is carrying his/her own burdens, etc.  And I'm not sure that  my workplace is any worse than other workplaces -- in fact, I'm pretty thankful for what it is, because it could be much worse.  And I thought about our toxic client: she's not mean or nasty, but she just saps all of the happiness and energy out of me with all of her personal drama that really has nothing to do with her real estate transaction.  Thank goodness she came in at the end of the day so that her visit didn't infect my mood for the rest of the day.  Thank goodness I'm not related to her -- see, again, could be worse!

And on my way home, I visualized a wall switch, and turned my workday "OFF".

No WONDER I gained weight working at this place.  I used to eat chips and chocolate to self-medicate through this cr*p.  I have to learn not to take such matters to heart, I think. 

Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!

Donkey - Sunday Jan 07, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 128.0

"Hold onto Kindness" --- a story shared on Facebook.  Going to add this as a daily mantra. 

I  am going to write about last night.  Saturdays are usually my "relax" day to keep me sane, food-wise.  So if I'm going to indulge, it's usually on a Saturday.  Last night though... I was watching a movie downstairs (Holiday Inn with Bing Crosby and Fred Astaire), and I don't know what came over me.  Almost felt like binge-eating, but I did think this out beforehand.  I wanted to finish the bag of Chex Mix -  probably 1 cup, possibly 1.5 cups, but then I graduated onto finishing up the bag of giant marshmallows in the pantry (had 3 -- I almost thought there were 4 but was happy that there were only 3 as that is what I had anticipated eating).  I had been longing for those marshmallows for QUITE time...

Then I was full.

No kidding - that was like an additional 600 calories!  

Woke up late this morning, still full -- Sundays are becoming my day to sleep in, since the Today Show is usually a re-cap of the week, and the other news shows don't start until 9am here.  So I got some added (and needed) rest, got up, exercised while watching the TV, and then had a lsmall, light breakfast.  But now I feel lunch gnawing at me....

But back to last night's eating... I'm not sure why this is bothering me so much.  My eating was intentional; I saved these delights for Saturday, so this was planned.  And overall I do like to have a higher calorie day in there, to keep my metabolism guessing. And I do allow myself to indulge on Saturdays -- although I don't always.

Maybe that's what's bothering me?  Maybe it feels counter-intuitive to eat more on a bad weigh-in day?  Or maybe I'm just being too hard on myself. "Hold onto Kindness" has to begin with myself.

Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 01/07/2018:
Be kind to yourself...it is so easy to get caught up in should and should nots.....As my WW leader said many many years ago....NEVER should yourself!...she was a sweetie and is one of my most memorable and favorite people. This isn't a dress rehearsal...this is it...this is life...and life is supposed to be lived....marshmallows and Chex mix are meant to be eaten.....it's OKAY to live...and enjoy life.....I hope you enjoyed your treat because treats are supposed to be enjoyed.

Maria7 on 01/07/2018:
About like me when I had 2 nites of popcorn binges a while back...I felt discouraged for giving in to that but, like you say, sometimes it may help to boost your metaolism to eat a little more occassionally, so let it go and move on, as they say. You have been doing FANTASTIC! Smile!

Donkey on 01/09/2018:
Oo, I had forgotten about your popcorn days. I guess we all have our ups and downs.

graindart on 01/07/2018:
If the worst you did was a pre-thought-out and measured amount of Chex Mix and 3 marshmallows, I'd consider that a major victory.

What would've happened to me: I would've started with the Chex Mix, with the intention of following up with the marshmallows and quitting afterwards. Then I would've thought, hey why not also eat 1 graham cracker and a small piece of chocolate with one of the marshmallows (smore). After the first one, I would've decided to do the same thing on the 2nd marshmallow and then the 3rd. By that time I would've decided that I might as well just turn this one day into a full-on cheat day. Would've hopped in the car and headed for the grocery store or nearest convenience store. Last year, Chex Mix and 3 marshmallows easily could've turned into a 1000+ calorie leap off the wagon for me.

Donkey on 01/09/2018:
It did cross my mind that I was on the way to slipping down that slope... But then I realized I was full and I hadn't had any other indulgences planned. So that's where it ended.

horn_of_plenty on 01/08/2018:
I used to do a TON of self sabotage with bad weigh ins and then overindulging making it worse. Just keep on j donk! I now don't weigh much and usually it's when I am feeling thinner and whenever thing dad's To be getting tighter I may off the scalene a d try to cut back a little bit.

Yes good job on only 600 cal ! That's far from a disaster. I have also learned a lot these couple years now and try also to prevent the worst and just moderately indulge instead! We are way better off this way!

Also commented below ;)

Maria7 on 01/09/2018:
Hope you are having a good day.

Donkey - Saturday Jan 06, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 128.0

I would be lying to you if I didn't say that I wasn't just a *little* disappointed with this week's weigh-in.  Up half a pound.  I kept trying to visualize 124.5, LOL...  I did eat more this week, and had a very salty day on Thursday, so I'm not entirely surprised.  Logically I know that this is just a normal fluctuation and basically the same weight as last week.  Also... When I stepped on the scale the first time this morning, I got an "error" message.  I might have just stepped on too soon, but hopefully this DOESN'T mean that my scale is starting to die.  I hope not!

It's just more motivation to do better this week.

I did really well with exercise.  Took longer walks during my lunches at work.  The Awful One doesn't even ask if I'm eating lunch in the conference room any more -- If I had to guess, I would say that this is her attempt to isolate me, as she needs an office scapegoat, and now that's me.  Our receptionist has asked me a couple of times if I'm eating lunch.  I smile sweetly and say, "No thanks, I'm going for a walk."  It was not easy walking in the bitter cold and snow, but I figured it would be a better workout.  Then I would eat lunch at my desk while I worked in the afternoon. 

Which makes this week's weigh-in suck even more.  All that hard work during the week for what...

But I realize that I need to heed Horn's advice to keep my thoughts and actions in a positive perspective.  It is counter-productive to walk or eat alone if it's done out of spite.  My walking or eating alone doesn't really hurt my co-workers, and if I'm doing this with a negative intent, it serves no purpose other than to foster that negativity, which then infects my whole mindset and attitude.  This week, I'm going to focus on positive affirmations when I walk or if I end up eating alone.  (I think the weather SHOULD cooperate with lunchtime walking.)  I will walk with positive intentions!


Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 01/06/2018:
Sounds like a plan.......and.....Kill em with kindness...they will begin to wonder why the Awful one is such a jerk. Karma is always at work, what goes round comes round. You just do what makes you the most content.

Donkey on 01/06/2018:
I think "Kill 'em with kindness" will be a good mantra this upcoming workweek, as I use it to focus on positive things for myself.

Maria7 on 01/06/2018:
Could be muscle weight, higher sodium food, or just the scale needs a new battery why you didn't see a decrease...(and I personally think STRESS plays a part)...Just hang in there and think back to where you once was weightwise and how happy you are for the progress your've attained thus far.

Donkey on 01/06/2018:
That's a good point about the stress... I hadn't considered that, but looking back, that would certainly be applicable.

Maria7 on 01/07/2018:
Hope you are having a nice day and feeling much better today.

Donkey on 01/09/2018:
Every day is a new blessing. At least that's how it starts out until I get to work... Then usually by 10am the feeling kind of wears off... Especially if someone toxic gets involved, whether that be co-worker or client.

horn_of_plenty on 01/08/2018:
Keep doing your thing! Loving your lunch walks - perfect since after work I am sure you want to stay home once you get home. It's been a challenge for me to get to the gym and still a challenge to keep the routine so I applaud you and love your lunchtime walks. Yes eat at your desk. Pay them no mind. -it's better than losing a job so just follow your own personal plan and let these office jerks try to bother you. They have an in - you know that - so let it go...meaning yes write it here but realize they somehow have been given that rare opportunity to be office bullies.

Donkey on 01/09/2018:
I will be following my own personal plan. I have to realize that I can't have it both ways: be apart and yet be included, but I'd rather be safe than burned.

Donkey - Wednesday Jan 03, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 127.5

Hello Friends,

I am here tonight to dump my frustrations with work.  I just thought of the perfect word to describe my workplace:  TOXIC.

I resent getting dumped on in work - either by co-workers playing petty office politics, other attorneys, lenders, clients -- and then I come home, filled with all of these really negative feelings.  I do not want to come home and dump my negative feelings out on my family members, but this toxicity is so hard to carry around.

How do I just let this go?

So the office politics:  I'm trying to just let it slide off my back.  Most of the time I'm successful, but sometimes I slip a little.  It hurts.  But at least I can see now what my co-workers are doing to keep me out of the loop on things.  That's fine.  If it means that I have to eat lunch with these ******* in order to be kept in the loop, then forget it.  Because I don't eat with people who stab me in the back.

The rest of it though...  I don't know, maybe it's time for a change.  I still think that I should be able to leave work, leaving frustrations and pain at work, and come home and be happy-happy. 

So I'm home now, came straight here to put this all down to help calm down and organize my thoughts, and my husband keeps interrupting me with what happened with his day, even though I've asked him THREE times to just let me finish this and we can talk about this stuff at dinner.

I just came from the office with frustrations and come home and deal with more frustrations...  Now I must eat my dinner.

Progress as of today: 59 lbs lost so far, only -9 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 01/04/2018:
It is so hard when you dislike your job. I think every office has their own brand of office politics....I saw it in the medical practice I worked for too. Basically what I did was...as I was getting into my car to leave...I switched the invisable off switch ( in my head)...and then it was my personal life again. I remember well the days when my husband would walk in the door from work and I would bombard him with my many tales of woe about the kids, the dog, the leaking faucet and my car with the low tire.....I wish I could go back and have a do over.....because I just wouldn't do it right at that moment. The other day Dr Phil said that they have a 4 minute rule.....no matter what happened that day...they couldn't talk about it for 4 minutes...and instead just spent that 4 minutes happy to be with each other again....then....they could both take turns telling their woes.....I'm hoping that today goes better for you.

Donkey on 01/04/2018:
This is a WONDERFUL idea! Today was much better, as I had to stop at the drug store on my way home to pick up some Rx's for my husband. A very nice way to decompress :-)

But I will try to visualize the on/off switch -- love that idea!

The 4-minute rule is a great idea too but I'm not sure that hubby can hold it in for that long, LOL. Still, I think he'll work with me on it.

horn_of_plenty on 01/05/2018:
Hello J-Donkey!

Regarding you writing first off about your work being TOXIC: trust me when I say this: MOST WORKPLACES ARE TOXIC! Listen to me, don’t just ignore what I’m saying PLEASE, because of all my job changes since I was a young teacher till now, between 10-15 years in multiple industries and as of late the past 7 years in this electrical industry, I’ve seen TONS of office politics, attitudes, prejudices, everything. I’ve seen some people get away with things while others get fired for doing the most minor things wrong….

My point to you is this….it’s Winter…it’s harder to remain positive, but I will you to take it less personally…like, let it annoy you, write about it here, but realize that you are probably more skilled than most others that work with you…or like you said, you have little help so you really are the “go to” person….so this is the case:

You must let it go…just do what you can at work…try not to waste time like I do by writing here to you now at work lol…but you MUST let it go for the sake of your health…both mental and physical. Simply learn to take it with a grain of salt? Is that a saying? You must come in, do your work, not work too much OT, and go home to another LIFE, a LIFE outside of your work life. SEPARATE the two…I am reading a book right now called The Slight Edge. Basically, what BOTH YOU AND I sometimes are lacking is the slight edge to being happy. We let negative thoughts roll on and forget to FIRST think of the positive. I’m going to give you exact examples later. This is VERY important actually.

Success comes with being happy. You MUST change your thought pattern….believe me,t rust me. This goes for me also. Let your workers and coworkers I mean, let them see you happy and smiling. Give off positivity. Believe you are happy. And when work gives you too much work, do what you can and breathe.

YOU ARE ALLOWED To leave work at work like you said. NOBODY is stopping you…you can still write about it here…I would be happy of course to read it…but you must laugh about it.

Keep working on letting the politics slide off your back…and NO, you do NOT have to eat with your coworkers. I like my space also and eat alone, especially now as we all eat at our desks. At work before in my other workplace a month ago where I was, I’d sometimes eat alone and sometimes with friends. ..the verdict is: YOU DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU. You are the sole administrator of YOURSELF. Make your decisions, as you can, on what is best for you. If your husband needs you, explain you need some time when you get home to go online to do this…and tell him that when you are doing this, not to interrupt you so that you will feel better when you see him after you finish this. Just explain it’s a way you like to relax like meditation. Explain you have to do it for you to feel better before you are with your family. I guess say it’s a way you take care of yourself. This is exactly what I’d say to Ricky…or any other man or person in my life also, if I lived with them.

Even when I am with ricky, I sometimes go on DD to update food…I tell him I just need a moment to update this….that I’ve been doing it a long time and it’s something I always do…and for him to give me a moment…and he does …because he is also doing something usually….or he always could use some time to himself even when we are together. Your hubby needs to let you do your thing..just explain it calmly. YOU ARE FINE. DONKEY, just continue to take care of yourself. You cannot help others till you are OK yourself. Do the things that make you happy. Eat your lunch alone at work, but don’t be thinking negative. Read a little happy thing everyday…I was starting to do this at work. TRUST that if you start to see the positive in things, it’ll become more of a habit. You decide how much happiness you have in life. Make sure you DO make decisions to eliminate some stress and give yourself time to yourself…at home and work. Nobody can take away your happiness except you. BELIEVE IT.

Donkey on 01/06/2018:
So much of what you said is spot on... I just have to remember to keep focusing on those goals (for myself) and not get sucked back into the toxicity.

Believe it or not, most of the time, I do walk around smiling and humming a happy tune, as a cover to my co-workers, especially to the Awful One. I know that she's very jealous of my weight loss, so she does what she can to bring me down.

So -- what I really need to do is work on maintaining my center, my focus.

happy-1 on 01/05/2018:
I thought this book was really good...

Working with You Is Killing Me: Freeing Yourself from Emotional Traps at Work by Katherine Crowley, Kathi Elster "For anyone trapped in an energy-zapping relationship with a co-worker, boss, or subordinate, Crowley and Elster offer an exit strategy - a highly practical and easily implemented guide to making the situation workable." - Publishers Weekly https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/working-with-you-is-killing-me-katherine-crowley/1103271625?type=eBook

Donkey on 01/06/2018:
Oh yes, I will be checking my library for this book. I think an exit strategy is what I need. Not necessarily to leave my job, but rather to exit the toxicity. Thanks!

Donkey - Monday Jan 01, 2018
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 127.5

I decided to weigh-in today for a 1/1/18 measurement, even though Saturdays are official weigh-in days for me.  Up a few pounds, but I definitely relaxed a bit over the weekend - as I usually do.  I thought it might be fun to look back at the end of 2018 and see where I've taken the numbers.

So my goals for 2018 are as follows:

  1. Wear more black.
  2. Eat more vegetables
  3. Keep a gratitude journal - That is, I want to write down daily anything I am thankful for.

Our houseguest leaves late tomorrow evening...  I was looking around the basement this morning, as I was stretching out, and realized how much more cleaning we have to do to get this house ready to sell.  I've got to get folks who get to stay home during the day to work on this as a serious effort, if we're going to do this.

Progress as of today: 59 lbs lost so far, only -9 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 01/01/2018:
Sounds like great goals...I LOVE to wear black...that and navy...always have!

Donkey on 01/01/2018:
Navy counts as black for purposes of this year's goal ;-)

Maria7 on 01/01/2018:
Happy New Year!

Donkey on 01/01/2018:
Thank you - you too!

horn_of_plenty on 01/02/2018:
I love your goals! Regarding your house, do what is within reason and try not to make yourself literally sick over it. Trust me sickness as we both know is seriously not worth it! Try getting extra rest to remain healthy which is what I'm doing also to feel 100%. I have to skip gym still until my symptoms are no longer below my neck which I read is a good rule of thumb....

horn_of_plenty on 01/02/2018:
Like you I have also indulged - not sure how much cut back I can do right now - but more importantly I am seeing that indulging MODERATELY is far better and far healthier than going into endless indulgence.

This is one of the first times I've been mostly homebound and not overindulged to the point of definite weight gain.

Back to you:....

horn_of_plenty on 01/02/2018:
Like you write below that your goals are not totally weight loss or career specific, I'm with you totally and doing the same. My goals are more moderate and general healthful. These are important goals which lead to balance and happiness. I agree it's turning over a new leaf and an excellent way to think! Rock solid agreement !

Maria7 on 01/03/2018:
Hope you are having a good day.

Donkey - Sunday Dec 31, 2017
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 124.5

SO GLAD WE'RE BACK ONLINE!!!  Thank you DD Webmaster!!! 

Logged in to get the final weigh-in of the year.  When DD was not working, and the future looked uncertain, I was trying to think of ways to log my weigh-ins for 2018, which I could manage but not blog too.

I'm feeling optimistic about the upcoming year.  I have a short list of goals for myself, and they are not weight-loss nor work related this time around - I think maybe I've finally learned to turn the page.  2017 was a very tough year, and I know that there will be some tough things to face in 2018, but I still feel like we're gonna be OK.

Progress as of today: 62 lbs lost so far, only -12 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 12/31/2017:
Here's hoping that 2018 is better for you......all things are possible and a new fresh start is always a good thing. Happy New Year!

horn_of_plenty on 01/02/2018:
Hiiii J Donk !! Wow so you logged as soon as you could gf! Already twice ! Cheers to you - you very pretty lady ! Never give up bc you look outstanding !

Donkey - Saturday Dec 23, 2017
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 124.0

As I mentioned in my last entry, these problems at work are just the kick in the butt I needed to get where I wanted to be.  I didn't realize how toxic eating lunch with these people every day was to not only diet and exercise but also to my mental well-being.  I think we're all happier this way.  Or maybe I'm becoming the square peg in a round hole...  Not sure, but not taking the chance of creating more mess, so I'm sticking to keeping my distance and just doing my job.

So my weigh-in this week is a combination of being too upset to eat lunch a couple of days, being sick and not eating as much, and additional walking time at lunch.  I predict that once I get over this cold/sinus infection, the weight will come back on...  Not sure where I want to go with this.

I had a client accuse me of ruining her entire holiday yesterday.  How do you think that makes me feel?  We're in the middle of home inspection negotiations, and the buyers have asked to have an exterminator come out and address the evidence of rodents.  Unfortunately, the letter came late in the day, but I forwarded it to her anyway, because we need to move forward, and she had been asking for updates on her file.  Then she emails me back saying how upset she is with me because I sent this to her on a holiday weekend when nothing can be done.  Which is not entirely true, because she can think about it, and businesses that are open on Saturday will still be open on Saturday.  So she can probably call Orkin.

I responded, "If it's any consolation, I will spend my whole holiday weekend worrying about your transaction."  

My husband continues to heal and improve from his double hip replacement surgery.  My mom texted me yesterday to say that she thinks my step-father is now slipping towards his end.  

Our houseguest has arrived for the holiday.  We all came to a compromised and moved the futon out of the basement and into a spare bedroom (that had been holding our packing boxes).  So I can still exercise in the basement early in the morning, and the guest and my daughter are on the same floor. 

Today the family (& houseguest) are going to see the new Star Wars movie.  Then we will meet up with my sister and her husband (from California) for dinner.  Trying to focus on spending time with people rather than gifts this year.

Progress as of today: 62.5 lbs lost so far, only -12.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 12/23/2017:
I will never understand clients who think that someone else telling them facts will ruin their day......amazing what people think about..and also amazing that anyone has to worry about FEELINGS, when they HAVE to know the facts...UGH. The more I'm around people the more I like animals. Sounds like a nice Christmas holiday for you and your family...Merry Christmas to you and yours.

Donkey - Wednesday Dec 20, 2017
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 128.5

So spitting MAD about the people I work with...

YESTERDAY they all ganged up on me and complained to the boss that I was being too mean.  Too mean... this from someone who makes 10 mistakes on EVERY file she opens up.  This from someone who hides files in her office, so that when a client calls and yells at ME, I don't have answers, but she sure does.  This from someone who jumped down my throat and said that I was causing her hives, just because I mentioned that the seller hadn't signed the contract.  Okay, yep it's all my fault. 

So when my boss sat me down to talk to me about this, I told him that I didn't appreciate all of my co-workers stabbing me in the back like that, and that this isn't all on me.  Yet the boss says that I need to make it work. What???

So TODAY even though I am SICK and coughing and feverish, I went to work, because I told my boss that I think that I am acting in and protecting my best interests by coming to work so that people can't talk about me behind my back!

I ended up leaving work early today...  and I think I just might come in late tomorrow.  But I'll be damned if I'm eating lunch with any of these backstabbers again.  I'm very particular about who I eat lunch with, and now that I know I can't trust any of them, I'll just leave them to their own nastiness, because sooner or later, they will start turning on each other.  (In fact, they already do, except for our Queen Bee with the hives, who can do whatever she wants and not get in trouble...)

On the bright side, this is the kick in the butt that I needed.  I can eat at my desk from now on, while I work, so I will spend my lunch hours walking.

Progress as of today: 58 lbs lost so far, only -8 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 12/20/2017:
Work ethic seems to be in short supply unfortunately and we are living in the times of everybody doing their own thing with no consequences....one thing is for sure, eventually other people figure out who the agitators are and then they get whats coming to them......people are jerks. Hang in there...she will get her due.

Donkey on 12/23/2017:
Thank you (((hugs)))

horn_of_plenty on 12/21/2017:
Hi donkey -

Some people just always get their way. They can be loud and backstab and nobody cares not even the boss. But don't fret and I know you are sick but try to take it less personally and more thinking it's just her personality - the backstabbeR. Do your work and try not to work extra and maybe double up on vitamin C and zinc which is what I will try tonight along with daytime cold medicine - I already had nighttime medicine at home - going to the pharmacy in my car Once I get home to pick up my regular unrelated Rx and cold medicine too :) I forgot what being sick feels like - the aches and pains - no exercise for me right now - was gonna go tomorrow but I may still be sick and it just makes me more sick whenever I try to exercise on low energy while sick :/ I am thinking you feel that way too..I hope not to be sick all winter . And wish the same for you!

Donkey on 12/23/2017:
I hope you are feeling better -- this is no fun.

Horn_of_plenty on 12/21/2017:
I agree with BCGG...although even if she gets her due, she may deserve even more than what the boss gives her. these people get away with things, not sure how....but they are in short supply and the rest of us must BEHAVE :-)

Donkey on 12/23/2017:
Right - I just have to focus on me and what I do or say. Most of my problems would not be here if I would just learn to SHUT UP.

Maria7 on 12/22/2017:
Hope you are having a good evening. Hope you're feeling better.

Donkey on 12/23/2017:
Thank you - things still aren't right, but I am feeling better.

Donkey - Sunday Dec 17, 2017
(Reduction of processed carbs & wishful exercise)
Weight: 128.5

I wanted to comment on a couple of comments or conversations that came up here on Diet Diaries that I've found helpful to me:

"How do I keep getting older and never get any smarter?"  - This is the story of my life.  It's like I'm trying to learn the same lessons over and over again -- losing weight, contentment with my body, happy with who I am and where I'm at , not saying really offensive things that get me into serious trouble -- and I mean serious.  I guess I have to repeat until I actually change, but sometimes it's hard to change who you are -- or should I say, what I've become.  It really bothers me when I say things that are really offensive. It's like, "Will I EVER learn?  Just SHUT UP already!"

  • I'm grateful that I have people around me who handle these situations better than I do.  They are a good influence on me.  While I might not be able to actually change inwardly, I can "walk the walk" and follow their examples.  My boss, my co-workers, my husband (only sometimes), my children (especially).

"Never get too far into your own head" - This is something I really need to watch.  I know I overthink things, which sometimes can be a GOOD thing, like at work, to think things through, but sometimes it ends up being self-defeating by clogging the thought-processes towards a successful outcome.  Again, I don't know if this is something I can change about myself.  It would help, though, if I would relax more rather than reacting (too) quickly.

This week ahead:  our houseguest arrives on Thursday, which will throw off my routine for 2 whole weeks.  I haven't worked out the details yet, but my exercise routine is sure to be challenged.

Progress as of today: 58 lbs lost so far, only -8 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 12/17/2017:
You know Donkey....it's funny....I'm 68 and I feel the same way....my Dad passed away at 83...and a couple of weeks before, he was commenting on all of the things he wished that he had done..or at least felt that he should have done and a week before his death he made a comment in the hospital about a window company he thought made a poor window...when the roommates visitor stepped over and said that "HE" worked for that window company and they made very good quality windows....my Dad said..."I'm sorry...I said the wrong thing again"....I think at that point I realized that we are basically never done learning....we are going to fall down and as long as we get up each time...we will be ok. We aren't supposed to be perfect.

happy-1 on 12/17/2017:

Horn_of_plenty on 12/17/2017:
yes, some of the Nutcracker score was a variation in Hip Hop style, but a lot of the music was actually also the same exact score. Mostly a recording. The also had a live violinist playing some music also in Hip Hop stlye at the beginning, before intermission, after intermission, and at the end. Their take on the score when a variation of the original in Hip Hop was very good and entertaining!

horn_of_plenty on 12/20/2017:
with the getting older and not smarter - YOU ARE getting smarter, but we continuously learn in life - so there's always somethign new to learn and new lessons to learn...so don't feel dumb, feel like a human being! it's natural. don't think of yourself as being different from everyone - we are all alike in this manner. continue to have confidence. you are NOT stupid. You ARE SMART!

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