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Donkey - Thursday Jan 17, 2008
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 129.5

Tomorrow is weigh-in day. That is the only reason why I am writing now. Job training is not going as well as expected. The test will be very difficult.

To top off all this stress and anxiety --- I went from having AF/TOM to having an awful sinus infection. I hope today is the worst of it. There is nothing positive I can say about being sick. Well, I suppose there is, because the cold medicine takes away my appetite, LOL.

EVENING EDIT: I just wanted to clarify or apologize for sounding like such a whiny ass - er, whiny donkey - earlier today (see above). It's not that I expected anyone to hand me a job. You see, I need a CDL for this job, so this entails another behind-the-wheel driving course, only with a big ol' school bus instead of a car. I vowed when I got my driver's license for my car that I would do whatever in my power to NEVER EVER have to take behind-the-wheel again.

So what do I do? I sign up for a job that involves driving. Well, maybe it just wasn't meant to be. Or maybe I will pass the test. It is just darn frustrating to do well on the skills and then to blow it at the very end with just one thing (hitting the curb with my rear tire -- big deal, I see truckers do this all the time and they have jobs).

Well, what is life without the challenge? As I came to realize earlier today, even though it ain't fun to fail, there IS life after failure.

It would be a huge disappointment though. I would feel like I let people down, most of all my Husband and myself. :-( Well, Monday is a holiday (MLK day) and Tuesday is review and Wednesday is my test. I have the weekend to study.

Progress as of today: 14.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!

dearerdiarist on 01/17/2008:
It sounds bleak :( It must be very difficult to concentrate on the job training first with one thing and then another. Maybe that test won't be as difficult as you have heard or imagine. I hope not. Don't fret. Just take it one thing at a time so that you don't crash, okay?

shadetree on 01/17/2008:
The test may be difficult, but you can do it! what is life without a good challenge? Hope you have a good weigh in tomorrow! Feel better!

workingit2 on 01/17/2008:
You have so much going on! Take care of yourself and get better quickly! Good luck tomorrow =)

applemarket on 01/18/2008:
Good luck with the studying and the test, and the weigh-in!! And get well soon! I'm sure the people around you would not feel any disappointment in you for any reason, so don't put unnecessary pressure on yourself to please others who love you unconditionally to begin with! Good luck again!

Donkey - Monday Jan 14, 2008
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 129.5

My anxiety level this morning is through the roof. It is almost making me sick to my stomach. I feel like I could easily eat my whole pantry. I will write more later when I have something more productive to say.

I just had to get that off my chest. I'm hoping the more times I say it, the less it will feel worse. That is, it will start to feel less and less bad. It's an awful feeling....

Progress as of today: 14.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!

jmarie60 on 01/14/2008:
Take a few seconds for yourself. Just go somewhere calm (if you can find somewhere calm) and just breathe.

We all need to have a little "me time" to help us collect our thoughts and decompress.

workingit2 on 01/14/2008:
Congratulations on the weigh-in on Friday! Somehow I missed your entry.

I know the feeling of the anxiety...I've been struggling with it lately here as well. I've had to call in all the resources, breathing deeply, calling family, meditation yadda yadda. Anxiety is hell, but at least we know how to deal with it most of the time.

Take care of yourself. Sending prayers that the bad feelings go away quickly and that you have a better day.

CritterMom on 01/14/2008:
What is it that's making you feel so stressed? Take an objective look at it, and say to yourself "if the worst really happened, what would REALLY happen as a result?" Would the world stop spinning? Probably not. Sometimes we build things up in our minds, or are trying to live up to other's expectations, so that we make ourselves sick with worry. Life is just too short to allow ourselves to live that way. Take a deep breath, and let it out slowly. Examine why the thing that is bothering is so important...and decide if it really is that important to you. Then play out some "what if" scenarios, to plan ahead how you could best handle each variation of the "what if". Sometimes saying out loud...I really DON'T care about that, or have a real stake in that, makes dealing with other people's expectations of our involvement a lot easier.

~smile!~ Attitude is half the battle.

borntocry on 01/14/2008:
You poor thing. Try not to eat your whole pantry - it will only make you feel worse. Do something that will make you feel better. (Maybe a really good workout? Or is that pushing it?)

borntocry on 01/14/2008:
P.S. I just read CritterMom's comment to you, and I must say that is excellent advice. It's something I've been trying to do myself lately. You know as women (and elder children - you're an eldest child too, aren't you?) we tend to take on a lot of responsibility, and there's really no need. Sometimes the worst that can happen isn't really that bad. Here's hoping that's the case for you!

dearerdiarist on 01/14/2008:
I am thinking of you and sending you those good thoughts. You are so dear and worthwhile. Crittermom has really said it all. Take those deep breaths. You are only one woman, you can't be in charge of the whole world. Be extra nice to yourself in as many ways as you can think of today, okay?

legcramps on 01/14/2008:
I agree with BTC - sometimes the things we worry about we really needn't bother because it turns out to not be as big of a deal as we thought it would!

CharlieAngel on 01/14/2008:
I totally agree with Crittermom! Take care and don't try to stuff your feelings of anxiety with food! It won't accomplish anything in the long run. Is this anxiety something that you deal with alot? If so, have you seen a DR about it? Just take care of yourself....you are so worth the effort! Hope your day turns right around....and that peace and contentment wash over you. Just breathe!

maria777 on 01/14/2008:
Please read my yesterday's entry! I know how it feels to want to binge! Hang in there! You are doing so well! Don't give in!

fritters on 01/14/2008:
I hope you were able to settle down. Sometimes, if it works with your schedule a nice hot shower or soak with a good book helps. I hope you stayed out of the pantry!

shadetree on 01/14/2008:

Hope you are doing a little better!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 01/15/2008:
I like what shadetree said. what is wrong over there??? maybe it is true and when i'm doing well, you really are struggling!? NO! It has to stop! I really hope everything is ok and if you need to vent MORE on here, please do so and maybe we can help.

Donkey - Friday Jan 11, 2008
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 129.5

Last Week's Weigh In: 131.5 This Week's Weigh In: 129.5

I'm rather rushed for time this morning, but I couldn't wait to report my weigh in. I was pleasantly surprised. I had a bad eating episode on Sunday, getting ready for the next day's new job adventure. So you never know how many pounds you'll retain from binges.

And the past 2 days I've been eating at the high range of my calories. (1960 calories) And AF is due. And I"m feeling rather bloated.

But it was all good in the end.

Progress as of today: 14.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!

crategrl on 01/11/2008:

shadetree on 01/11/2008:
HOORAY FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 01/11/2008:
rememeber 1960 is in the NORMAL range. I was having success with my weightloss recently when i mixed some high cal days...even 2000-2200 in with low cal days!

timeforachange on 01/11/2008:
Awesome job with the weight loss! Keep it up! Sounds like you are doing well Donkey, have a great weekend!! =)

greengirl on 01/12/2008:
Good for you Donkey :) You have been so consistent !!!

Donkey - Thursday Jan 10, 2008
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 131.5

It seems it's been a few days since I've updated. Now that my mornings are occupied with training and not computer online time or at the gym, I have a lot less computer time.

The job training is going well. I knew it wouldn't be so bad, but I just dreaded the First Day. Of course, I'm new, I don't know what's going on. But I am doing as well for a newbie. At least they have to give me credit for trying hard and making the effort!

All this week, I have been going to the gym, directly from work. Some days it's for running (since I"m doing a 10k training program) but other days it's just for a little more cardio (walking) and weight training. Today is a running day but I think AF is coming or here, so I dunno... All my stuff is already at the gym though, from my early morning workout.

I still get up very early in the morning to go workout at the gym before the day starts.

So hopefully I will take advantage of today and go running. It's only 2 miles. But as I said I am tired. Very tired.

Tomorrow is weigh-in day and I'm really looking forward to it!!! I feel the NEED to KNOW what I weigh, now that I've been holding steady for 4-5 days.

EDIT: Went for a run. Boy, was I dragging, so it was not one of my better running episodes, but fortunately, it was only 2 miles so I could do it quickly and get it over with. I'm afraid to see what's in store, running-wise, next week. ;-)

Total Running Miles for 2008: 12.0

Progress as of today: 12.5 lbs lost so far, only 1.5 lbs to go!

jmarie60 on 01/10/2008:
I know it's hard to do things when you're tired. You should go running. You'll feel better for doing so!

Good luck on the weigh in tomorrow!!!!!

hollybelle on 01/10/2008:
You have had a big change in your schedule. Go easy on yourself for a few weeks until you acclimate to the new things in your life.

CritterMom on 01/10/2008:
Good job on getting those workouts done! Less than 2 pounds to go, too! Woo-hooo!

greengirl on 01/10/2008:
I knew you would do fine at work. Well done on keeping up the exercise too. Good luck with the weigh-in . You deserve to do well :)

dearerdiarist on 01/10/2008:
Amazing, you are amazing. Hope that weigh in is a beaut!

legcramps on 01/10/2008:
I remember doing my 5k training last year - I felt exactly the same way as you do right now, in regards to what the next week would bring - horror and disappointment, or pleasant surprises!

I wish you pleasant surprises!

workingit2 on 01/10/2008:
Congratulations on getting through the first days of work and doing so well! yay! And for keeping up with your exercise in the mornings...I give you big props for that! Good luck with your weigh in! =)

Donkey - Tuesday Jan 08, 2008
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 131.5

Where oh where to start?

I started training for my new job today. I think it will go well, but I'm not ready to start talking about details in depth yet. At least not today.

Unfortunately, I did binge last night, getting anxious about today. I just wanted to get The First Day out of the way. Know what I mean? Of course, why I thought EATING would resolve that, I don't know. Argh, will I EVER learn???!!!

I would guess I had about 2500-2700 calories. Needless to say, I had PLENTY of energy today. So all was not lost. I did very well at the gym early this morning on the elliptical. Came home and got the kids off to school -- and gave the damn cat her medicine -- then went to training, which was until lunchtime.

I had planned ahead of time to go to the gym after training, so that I would not come home and fall apart and eat. I don't think I would have but the possibility exists. I don't know if I will plan to go to the gym after training tomorrow as well. Hmm... maybe I should. I probably should.

The gym in the morning this week has been absolutely NUTS. Crowded out the gills. It's really sad when you get there at 5:15a (the gym opens at 5a) and it's already packed. So I can see that i am really going to have to try hard to get there even earlier. Which I would have but I always check my email while I drink a cup of coffee before I leave. I drink a full cup of coffee and then leave. But if I wasn't doing the email, then I'd probably drink a half of cup and then leave. Ugh, old habits are hard to break.

I cannot WAIT until the New Years' Newbies Rush is over. Apologies to any Gym Newbies here reading this.

Today should definitely be a better eating day. Friday Weigh In will probably be a disaster though :-(

Total running miles in 2008: 10.0

Progress as of today: 12.5 lbs lost so far, only 1.5 lbs to go!

jmarie60 on 01/08/2008:
There's a crazy surge of people at my Gym too working on their NYR. My gym is small too, so I am annoyed that my machines that I want when I want aren't always available.

be positive about the Friday weigh-in. It's all in the attitude. If you set yourslef up for failure, you will fail... but if you're positive, you're going to be less likely to slip!!!

dearerdiarist on 01/08/2008:
Job training AFTER the gym. You are my superhero. I remember job training as something that kept me so tense.... when I got home I was too tired to phone and order a pizza. I REALLY think you are sounding great. Take care.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 01/08/2008:
I also HATE the New Year's rush! ugh!!!!! hopefully i will get into the yoga class today, unlike last night because of them!

I also binged tonight a little bit bc i'm so nervous lately....course sign up today and test tomorrow...thanks for asking how it went. it did go well, i'll probably update my journal on that later this evening!

I'm glad your job is going well too, Donkey! :)

workingit2 on 01/08/2008:
First days are difficult...I always dreaded them. At least you are keeping up with your exercise! Have a great evening =)

Donkey - Sunday Jan 06, 2008
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 131.5

EVENING EDIT: I survived the party. I came away with a clear picture of what is wrong with Grandpa. It is a sad, last leg of a long life's journey. Still, it was good to see the family together. I did very well with my calories. They are big casserole people, which I detest. I hate casseroles. So I did not eat much at the party, and then came home and had a little supplemental. I managed to come in at around 1500 (a little more, I think) with my daily calories and did well on water while I was there. Water and gum chewing really saved the day.


Had a great workout at the gym this morning. i'm so glad we went to Mass last night and got it out of the way so that I could go 100% today. I am so stressed out about Life right now. The treatment with my cat is difficult. I have this party at my Inlaws' house today and with Grandpa being sick with cancer in the hospital... The kids go back to school on Monday; I start job training on Tuesday --- oh Calgon, take me AWAY!!!

Anyway, did 65 min on the elliptical (over 7 miles!), then I did upper body weights on the machines and then I ran 2 miles on the treadmill, which marks the beginning of my 10k training program.

Total Running Miles: 7.0

Progress as of today: 12.5 lbs lost so far, only 1.5 lbs to go!

shadetree on 01/06/2008:
Great workout! One day at a time...

legcramps on 01/06/2008:
That's right, one day at a time...

FRITTERS on 01/06/2008:
I have been away for a while and am just now catching up. I am sorry to hear that you are going through so much. Having a sick pet is almost like having a sick child. I wish you all the best and hope grandpa is 'comfortable'. You are doing a really good job with cal. and exercise even with so much else on your mind. Good for you!!

timeforachange on 01/06/2008:
Wow awesome exercise for the day! Great job with the get together you went to as well. I agree, gum and water are lifesavers! They have shot down many a binge in my day. So sorry about your grandfather. My mother-in-law has cancer as well. It's one of the worst diseases in the world and they need to hurry on up and find a cure! You and your family are in my prayers. Hope you have a good day tomorrow Donkey... Hang in there, you are doing great!

borntocry on 01/07/2008:
Hey Donkey! I'm so sorry to hear about your cat, and your husband's grandfather. This really has been a horrible start to the year for you, hasn't it? You poor thing! Hopefully things will get better!

At least you can take comfort in the fact that you haven't used these hard times as an excuse to give up on your goals. So you're training for a 10K? When?! I can't believe I missed that! You must tell me more about it!

greengirl on 01/07/2008:
Hope things get better for you soon Donkey. Very sorry to hear about Grandpa. Under the circumstances you are doing amazingly well !!

Donkey - Friday Jan 04, 2008
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 131.5

Time for another Donkey Update:

1. We are going to try to save my Stinky. The vet seemed to think that she was not beyond impossible, so we will try. As long as she is able to endure the treatment and it's somewhat affordable, we will do what we can. This means I give her 2 medicines 2x a day PLUS an IV (which requires a needle in the skin) 2x a day. I hate needles. That is a good impetus for me never ever to get diabetes. I could not stand giving myself insulin shots.

2. Husband took today off to go to the hospital and meet up with family and visit Grandpa. He has yet to leave.

3. I thought yesterday was Friday, so I weighed in, which I realized last night it was only Thursday. So I could have waited another day and maybe had a better weigh-in if I had weighed in this morning.

Last night, I was so tired from the stress and from crying the night before (really screws up my contact lenses), that I just ate and ate and ate. On the plus side, I had lots of energy for a workout today. Did the elliptical and ran and some weight training.

When I eat more, I can do more.


Progress as of today: 12.5 lbs lost so far, only 1.5 lbs to go!

Moody2 on 01/04/2008:
Awww, I hope that things go well with Stinky. I am a huge animal lover and know how hard it is when they are not doing so well.

What a great workout you had, good for you!!

dearerdiarist on 01/04/2008:
Sending you a REALLY great {{{hug}}}. You are going through so many things at once I am amazed that you can get out of the covers. Be very kind to yourself. See you tomorrow.

hollybelle on 01/04/2008:
So sorry to hear of all the troubles. Not surprised husband hasn't left yet. Men have such a hard time facing very emotional situations - we all do, but men sometimes resist it fiercely. When it rains - it pours. Sending you a big cyber (((((((HUG))))))) Hang tough!

workingit2 on 01/04/2008:
I hope the treatment helps your cat! It is very difficult to watching them be so sickly, I know after watching my brother's cat *sigh*

Congrats on the exercise!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 01/04/2008:
I am very glad to see you are doing better today. I definitely can identify with how you felt yesterday! It seems these days me and you are having lots of similiar emotions!

I hope your cat is doing better. :)

biscottibody59 on 01/04/2008:
I know you want the best for your cat, but today's vets are not the vets of yore--there are some very unscrupulous people out there and sadly many of them are vets. These unscrupulous people not only don't want to put your animal to sleep until "everything's been done for it," they want to squeeze every dime out of you, the animal's owner.

Do all you can for your cat, but beware. I've had one firsthand experience with putting a pet to sleep, and will have at least another eventually. It wasn't easy and I'm sure it's even more difficult with children around--I certainly feel for you. I also saw a friend go into major CC debt to postpone the inevitable for a few months. She was beside herself for the entire time of treating a cat for diabetes--personally I don't know how she did it, work and live--all at the same time.

Not saying this is your situation, just wanted to sort of commiserate in some way. It's hard no matter what.

greengirl on 01/04/2008:
Donkey, I am so sorry to hear about your problems. I hope you can get them sorted out. I agree, somewhat, with biscottibody that some vets try and squeeze every last penny they can out of your misfortune. Let's hope the vet is not raising your hopes up to the detriment of the animal. It is understanable that you're upset and wanting to turn to food for some consolation. I know its what I do ! I will be thinking of you, keep your chin up

shadetree on 01/04/2008:
Great run today! I find that exercise helps me a lot when I'm stressed/frustrated/upset. (I either eat or exercise....I TRY to exercise, but sometimes it sneaks up on me and I find myself eating...)

I hope things work out with the cat. I'm with you - I hope I never have to face diabetes as there is no way that I could inject myself. They have to give me gas at the dentist in order to get me relaxed enough to give me novacaine. I just can't do needles!

Hope you get a little bit of sunshine tomorrow - it always helps lift my spirits a little bit!

biscottibody59 on 01/06/2008:
RYC: Thanks for your comment! I can always use a vote of confidence and you know the feeling is mutual!

Your explanation made me think of a cat we had when I was in HS. At about 2 yrs she was diagnosed (and I use that term loosely after she lived another 12 or so years) with leukemia. The vet gave her a death sentence and a vitamin injection. Oh and we were told to feed her only dry cat food. She never showed signs of illness again. She became arthritic later on.

She was a rather small, typical "scaredy cat" and, after her miraculous recovery, became this loving as all-get-out to us, bully to cats twice her size. She'd get into these fights, though she never seemed to pick them--haha--and never get a scratch. So I'm hoping yours has a great recovery. With cats it seems anything is possible. (To this day--I don't know what it was with that cat, but it was kinda weird;-)

Donkey - Thursday Jan 03, 2008
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 131.5

Time to face the music...

That's what the scale said this morning.

It seems as though 2008 is not starting off very happily.

1. My beloved Stinky (cat #2) is dying. Husband took her to the vet yesterday. Her liver and her kidneys are failing. She has lost over half of her healthy body weight. To respect her quality of life, I think we will be putting her down on Friday, unless a miracle comes back from her blood tests, which I highly doubt.

2. Husband's grandfather is... well, essentially, he is dying as well. He is in the hospital with a broken back, because his bones have deteriorated so much that his spine can no longer support his head. They are running tests to confirm what kind of cancer it is. Sunday is his big family get-together (LOTS OF AWFUL FOOD). Won't that be fun?

3. This is not bad news, but just stressful to deal with: My brother is moving to Japan for 3 years in a couple of weeks. We are thinking about buying his mini-van. We are thinking about asking my folks if they would like to purchase my car. I guess I'll be undergoing a colonoscopy because I don't know where else we would pull the money out from.

4. Let us not forget that I still have job training looming in my future next week. Ta-dah!

Ever play dodgeball? That's what I feel like I"m doing right now, with Life or maybe God on the other side, throwing all these things at me. The urge to eat my sorrow was very strong last night (ice cream). But I held off. Eating isn't going to resolve any of my grief.

Progress as of today: 12.5 lbs lost so far, only 1.5 lbs to go!

jmarie60 on 01/03/2008:
You are so close to your goal. Don't let life drive you to the fridge. there are better ways to deal with all this stress. Call a friend. Go for a walk and be alone with your thoughts. It'll help you think through some things. Go outside and scream your head off (you might want to warn your neighbors for that one.) I'm a firm believer that God doesn't throw anything at us that we can't handle. It may seem like everything is going wrong all at once, but you can get through it.

(PS... the line about the colonoscopy made coffee come out my nose!!!! I'm glad to know you have such a good sense of humor with all of this.)

workingit2 on 01/03/2008:
Isn't it normal for maintenance to fluctuate 1-5 pounds? I wouldn't know because I haven't had that problem yet lol.

Sorry to read about all the rough things going on..it sure does make the sweet times that much more enjoyable. Have a better day =)

dearerdiarist on 01/03/2008:
That colonoscopy comment was great medicine for me! :) Thanks for that! One thing, one thing, one thing at a time, dear Diarist. You are just one woman. I wish you peace while you are going through such stress.

shadetree on 01/03/2008:

One day at a time, one thing at a time. That's all you can do. Let me know if the colonoscopy idea works!

timeforachange on 01/03/2008:
Aww Donkey it's sad to see you down like this! Things sound like they are rocky on your end, and I hope they get better! Let us know how everything works out, and I hope your get-together with your family goes ok! Just try to focus on making good decisions even when you are surrounded by bad food. Wow I wish there was something else to say to make things turh around for you, but just know that everything will work out and be ok. Keep your head up! Ooohhh and quick sidenote to add:: love how you can keep your sense of humor during hard times, I laughed to tears over your sarcastic remark about finding money for the minivan!=P Be strong!

legcramps on 01/04/2008:
It's amazing the number of obstacles we have to get through, and it's only just January!! Hope the rest of the month goes well for you - keep that chin up and never stop trying.

Donkey - Tuesday Jan 01, 2008
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 0.0

My weigh-in on New Year's Day was SOOO BAAAD, that I decided to wait (no pun intended) until my regular weigh-in day of Friday (tomorrow) to enter in any weight on my progress chart.

On the positive side, I went running today! (sort of) Unlike yesterday, I remembered to bring my running shoes to the gym today, and I ran 2 miles on the treadmill (after doing an hour on the elliptical, of course). It's not much but it's a start, and everyone has to start somewhere. Another plus was that I ran faster than I ever have on a treadmill and felt just fine. So I think I will continue to try to run at faster speeds.

(Mind you, when I say "faster" I am probably talking about "average", as I am a slow runner.)

I think it would be fun to see how many miles I run this year. Henceforth, I will keep a running tally of running miles. This will not include elliptical miles nor cool-down miles on the treadmill. I use www.mapmyrun.com to calculate my outdoor running miles, unless I get myself a gadget that will do the counting for me (e.g. Garmin Forerunner).

RUNNING MILES TOTAL: 0 + 2.0 = 2.0

borntocry on 01/02/2008:
Dude, where's your entry?!

So I see now that you are to blame for my recent struggles. Thank goodness for that - I thought it was my own gluttony! I couldn't help but laugh when I read about your Christmas cookies - those are the culprits which brought me down as well! So how many did you have? I think I had, like, twenty a day for three days.

Anyway, I think it's Horn's turn to suffer now, so can you please start doing well again?

borntocry on 01/02/2008:
Well, mayyybe your theory will still prove to be right, as I have had a pretty good day so far, and hubby wants to order pizza for dinner tonight (which tends to be a pretty "safe" food for me, bizarrely enough).

I also keep track of my running miles, both "fast" and "slow". In my case also "fast" is not all that fast - basically I consider anything timed to be "fast" no matter what my actual speed is, because at least I'm *trying* to run fast. But for the last few months I've chalked up hardly any "fast" miles. I wish I had access to a treadmill. Instead I'm going to have to start trekking out to the sports center so I can do my timed runs on the track and try to improve my speed before my half-marathon. Otherwise if it's just going to be another 13 mile jog then there's no point even doing it...

workingit2 on 01/02/2008:
Jogging/running..whatever feels right for you is right for you! Congrats on the great exercise! And I am happy to read that your car is in working order *whew*

Have a great rest of the day!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 01/02/2008:
haha, I LOVE BTC's first comment to you! I will NOT suffer right now, thank you! haha.

I have read about many runners who are slow runners. They say it means little and that endurance is most important for running. So, great job today! :) One day I will be a runner...I hate saying that. I wish I could say, today I'm a runner. Maybe i don't want to be a runner? i need to think about this!

timeforachange on 01/02/2008:
Aww congrats on your treadmill progress! Haha I think that running at all on a treadmill is great no matter how fast or slow. Keep it up and have a good day tomorrow!

P.S No one should suffer!!!!hahaha that whole thing made me laugh!

shadetree on 01/03/2008:
Oh - is that better than google earth? That's how my son (and someday maybe me if I can ever make the committment to run) keep track of miles. He wants one of those GPS things so bad!

Donkey - Monday Dec 31, 2007
(Calorie Counting & Exercise)
Weight: 128.0

The last day of 2007. I am happy to say that my car is working again, albeit somewhat reluctantly, so I was able to make it to the gym this morning. Life goes so much better when I can take care of myself FIRST, even if it means waking up at the ungodly hour of 4:30a to do so.

Which means that I will be asleep by 9:30p for sure. No midnight toasting for me!

I know that my weigh in tomorrow will not be a true reflection of my efforts in 2007, sadly. I did so much better than the past 3 days have put back on. But that just gives me more reason and motivation to get back on track.

I see now that I must find a happy medium in my eating patterns, because it seems to me that when I do very well, Horn of Plenty suffers. And when I do very poorly, Born to Cry does not fare as well. My wish for all is to find a happy medium of optimum health.

And to the person who thinks I do not enjoy my cats at all: This is not true, but I sure do get damn tired of cleaning up sh*t, diarrhea, hemorrhoids, vomit, and hairballs every GGG DDDD day. Ya know? It gets a bit old after the 68th time. You tell me I should find homes for my cats. Oh yes, like there's such a high demand for old cats with these "character" traits. Not to mention the $ that I shell out in food and litter very month. Thanks Nerak, I really needed your comments yesterday like a kick in the head.

Progress as of today: 16 lbs lost so far, only -2 lbs to go!

shadetree on 12/31/2007:
Glad your car is working and that you were able to get to the gym. I'm sure I'll be in bed before midnight as well - can't remember the last time I made it to see the ball drop!

I think you hit it on the head - that we all need to find that happy medium.

Hope you have a happy, healthy, peaceful new year!

timeforachange on 12/31/2007:
Morning workouts are the best. I agree that it's nice to take care of yourself first before anything else in the day. In answer to your question I do own an elliptical. Well my parents own it, and I utilize it since I'm staying with them until next September. My parents also have a Bowflew, buttt I haven't gotten into the habit of using that yet. My husband and I own a treadmill that's in storage right now. Haha it was my birthday present last year. I had a membership to Lady Of America gym last year, but it's hard to keep a membership when you are military and move a lot....it's a pain to sign contracts and break them. Anyway, have a good New Year!!!!!! And I agree with you about the cat thing. Yes you may get frustrated with them from time to time, but that doens't mean that you love them any less!

timeforachange on 12/31/2007:
*Bowflex...no there isn't a cheaper 'generic' version of it called Bowflew....I just can't spell =P

nerak on 12/31/2007:
I am sorry about the comment. I did not mean to upset you. It was just an opservation based on what you said.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 12/31/2007:
yeah, balance in life, balance in eating. when there's balance, there's a sense that you can accomplish all of your goals. Although my own future is up in the air, I have learned that many people face this in life and that for right now, I should not worry so much because there's NO way I can get certain answers anytime sooner than by waiting. why wreck my dreams and goals of staying in shape and having a ncie physique because I want all the answers to my life now!? it makes no sense.

Look at your overall progress from April through December of this year! That's success! Good Job! :) Maintenance is difficult, but can be done. Weight does fluctuate between a few pounds, its expected. I also HATE knowing the number just for that reason. there are so many factors that contribute to what our weight is from one week to the next.

applemarket on 01/01/2008:
Good for you, have a great new year and send kisses to your cats for me! Don't feel too bad about your weight not reflecting your hard work. I went through a crazy yo-yo dieting phase where I lost 12 lbs in 3wks then gained back 16 lbs in a week an a half! I felt so crappy after having working really hard to lose that much to begin with...

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