Despite Monday's weigh-in, I've had an awesome week at the gym so far. Just this morning, I was looking at my arms and realizing that the muscles in the upper part seem larger to me. I love the sculpted look of lean, strong arms. That will be me, soon enough!
Yesterday, I actually went for a bike ride outside in my new neighborhood. This neighborhood is wonderful because they have a LOT of bike trails. My old neighborhood seemed almost hostile to anything not in a car. The sidewalks were falling apart, the roads were not bike-friendly, nothing. But here, everything is built to entice people to get outside. I often see people walking, jogging, and bike riding when the weather is nice. Today it is not so nice outside.
So I am enjoying a more active lifestyle. My Husband STILL has YET to set foot in the gym that we joined. (((It's a good thing we didn't sign up for the Fancy Gym membership or I would be so ****ed.))) I'm not putting him down, though, because I know how hard it can be to take that first step. Every day, I tell him what the crowd looked like (I've NEVER had to wait for a machine), the men/women ratio, any new machines I've tried, etc. I also make it a point to tell him if I see newbies getting their orientation tours. All I can do is hope that it rubs off on him, and that he'll want to get into shape like Justine6Robert3's husband has recently.
Progress as of today: -1.5 lbs lost so far, only 15 lbs to go!
Second week in a row where I'm reporting a weight GAIN rather than a loss. This is so frustrating. I know what did me in too, thank you PMS for those sweet cravings on Saturday night.
I only have myself to blame.
Progress as of today: -1.5 lbs lost so far, only 15 lbs to go!
Today I went to the gym and I *finally* worked up the nerve to try the weight machines that work the upper body. AWESOME! Yay! Now I feel that I am ready to start a basic weight training program.
The ironic thing is that I went to the weight machines (that I was afraid to use) because I was too afraid to use the stair stepper machine because some younger guy was using it (there are only two). I get really sweaty, which I already was from using the elliptical, and I really didn't want to be near any man, much less a young, good looking man, drenched in sweat.
I was encouraged to see a woman at the gym that reminded me very much of a friend of mine who has moved to New York, except that this lady was totally into working out and weight training (unlike my friend).
I'm looking forward to my weigh-in tomorrow (Monday morning), even though I had a PMS moment last night and indulged in some chocolate. Way overdid it (unfortunately), but I'm still looking forward to my moment of truth.
Progress as of today: -0.5 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!
I'm sorry that your son is struggling, I'm sure that's very stressful for you. My sister's middle child has always had many behavoural problems that were apparent as soon as she started kindergarten. She will be 12 yrs old in April. She no longer "acts out", but instead she is extremely shy, she hardly talks to anybody at school, including her teachers. She is very chatty when she is amoungst her family though. They have labelled her as having "selective mutism" which basicly means she is severly shy to the point of it being crippling for her. I hope you are able to get him the help he needs.
I'm glad that your enjoying your gym and getting comfortable there. Good luck on your weigh in tomorrow!!!
Have a great day!!
Yesterday was so hard. I can only hope that today is better.
Husband and I had to go to my son's school and take him home early because he was having behavior issues, and the school social worker thought it best that he not return to the classroom. My son is having such a hard time. And my Husband isn't helping matters much, as I think he's been living in a semi-state of denial about our son's struggles.
So of course, what do we have for dinner but pizza. I was doing very well calorie-wise until dinner. Then I had 4 slices of pepperoni pizza and that was 1000 calories right there. So I had to try *very hard* not to have dessert. Which was probably a good idea anyway, because feeling as bad and stressed and sad as I was feeling, getting started on any kind of sweet probably wouldn't have been a good idea.
Hopefully my son will have a better day today. We talked over some things, gave him some coping mechanisms and he seemed to understand the importance of normal behavior, of what is expected of him. I hope that he does not become SO overwhelmed or anxious that he resorts back to his old behaviors today.
Progress as of today: -0.5 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!
I've been going to the gym every day this week. Now my Husband has a week and a half off, so my whole routine will be thrown off. I can only hope that he will come to the gym with me.
Yesterday was warmer outside, so I tried to put on a pair of capri pants after my shower after exercising. I could hardly snap them and my butt felt so tight in the fabric. I took a look and oh my, how saggy and droopy and flabby I looked from behind. So I am not quite ready for summer clothing yet, unless I want to go out and buy new clothes (which I don't want to do).
But all in all, I've been doing much better. See what I mean about everything falling into place with exercise? I had a conference with my son's teacher, and my son is having a lot of problems and issues that need to be addressed. He's been neglected because the school district we used to live in was AWFUL and most of the teachers were in denial. (And we could not afford to provide services for him privately. We knew we were moving, and we wanted to see how many of my son's problems were environmental (due to the school) and how many were actually his issues.) So when we moved, my son starts a new school and it's like he's waving all these "red flags" that he needs help. Poor kid! And I feel just horrible.
BUT I DID NOT RESORT TO FOOD! I did not fall back on eating to make me feel better about the situation. It was then that I realized that Life is going to throw obstacles at me all the time. And I need to learn how to cope with them other than stuffing my face at the first sign of trouble. I need to learn to live with and deal with the discomfort of anxiety and sadness. It's a part of life.
Progress as of today: -0.5 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!
It's a big step that you have taken toward real change. Keep up the good work, you inspired ME today!
That must be very frustrating for you to see your son struggling and not being able to get him the help he needs. It does seem to vary from school to school and also with their teacher. I hope his new school is more willing to give him the extra help he needs!!
I have an interview with Taylor's teacher tomorrow. She has been struggling with her reading and writing. Her teacher is really amazing with her though. She has been very hands on with Taylor. She has called me in for extra interviews so that we could get her extra help both at home and in the school. They have been having Taylor and a few other students pulled out of their regular class a couple of times a week to give them extra help in a small group setting and they have now arranged for her to meet with a "Speech-Language Pathologist to try to further figure out why she's having difficulty so they can find a way to get her the help she needs right away. Taylor has only met with the speech-language pathologist once so far (I think from now on she will see her once a week, one on one) and she loved her and can't wait to get together with her again. They make it a very non threatening environment and try to teach them through games and things that won't intimidate them.
Taylor does really well in Math, gym, drama, music etc (many of the arts!!) but she just seems to be struggling with her writing and reading. She is also almost a year younger than many of the kids in her grade because she was born in December so I think that puts her at a bit of a disadvantage also.
Good for you not resorting to food for comfort!! Keep up the great job with your exercising!!! I find it more challenging to stick with my routine on week-ends or when Kirt is off work also, good luck next week!!
Anyway, I hope that the new school provides a better environment and services for your son.
I hope you can get your son's "issues" sorted out soon! Hopefully he will get more attention in the new school.
If I could have more days like today I would have no problem getting to goal and STAYING at goal.
Today I did an hour of interval training on the crosstrainer. Then I walked on the treadmill for 30 minutes during the 11a news broadcast. (I'm so glad that missing Boy Scout was rescued!) Then I tried the stair stepping machine for 10 minutes. I had the level or resistance entered in wrong, though, so I only felt like I worked for 3 minutes of the 10. The rest of it was like a really good stretch. At any rate, I now have a goal of conquering the stair stepper.
I also had enough courage today to try the lower body weight training machines. If you could see the cellulite on my thighs from this weight gain, you would understand what drove me to conquer my fear or shyness and get on those machines and work it. UGH! How could 15lb look so UGLY???
Progress as of today: -0.5 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!
So I'm glad you have tackled the machines at the gym. The stair stepper has always been the toughest for me. I wish I could have a go at the weight training machines - I love those!
Thanks for your advice on my recent lack of enthusiasm for exercise. I think I'll take it and go buy some new sports bras (can't really justify the shoes after two recent purchases turned out to be uncomfortable and are pretty much wasted)!
I don't know what to do. I realized over the weekend that we should have joined the Fancy Gym. I think. I think I would be so much more motivated to go to that gym more often than I am at the Basic Gym (although I have yet to step in the Basic Gym). On weekends that my Husband works - like this past weekend - I could have taken the kids swimming. Otherwise we're just sloths all day long. Also, with the Fancy Gym, the child care there is better, so Husband and I could workout together, after he gets home from work (on days that the kids don't have anything scheduled). I think we're both having trouble getting motivated to get into the gym.
Ergh. I know I'm right: we should have joined the Fancy Gym. It's just that I cannot possibly justify the high enrollment fee ($380, if you will recall) while I am not bringing in any income into the family. Especially if eventually we will have home gym equipment and won't need a gym period.
Maybe I'm just trying to talk myself out of going to the Basic Gym this morning. It might just be my fear of new situations talking, and not actually my Logical Self (if that makes any sense).
If you notice, I weighed in higher than ever this morning. I am not a happy camper.
HELP!!
UPDATE: I finally peeled my butt away from the computer and went to the gym. I tried to act like I knew exactly what I was doing, which of course, I did not. So because I did not know what I was doing 2 very interesting things happened:
1. I ended up doing 60 minutes on the elliptical crosstrainer. I couldn't figure out how to set the timer, it just did it for me, so I figured, OK, what the heck, I'll do an hour.
2. I tried to program the treadmill, but it asked me how many miles per hour I wanted to move at. Now how can I figure that out without my calculator and some scratch paper and a pencil? So I typed in "10 mph" until I realized that that is a VERY fast run. Oh my! So very quickly, I started walking, jogging, sprinting. All I can say is thank goodness the "STOP" button is very red and very large.
I was somewhat disappointed in myself that I did not have the courage to try any of the weight training machines. But that will come in time. Tomorrow I want to try the stair stepper machine, as it has been ages since I've used one of those.
One very annoying aspect of the gym is that there are only 4 ellipticals that I like (the ones withOUT the moving handlebars) and they face TV's with sports channels. BAH! Oh well, at least it wasn't a soap opera but I would have preferred a game show or news. Can't go wrong with news. Also the music piped in at the gym was not what I would have chosen, but my mp3 player seems not to be functioning any more.
I repeatedly told myself not to think negatively, that this would be just like working out at home (eventually) with just the basics and to be happy with what I have. I think it worked, to some degree.
Husband called me when I came home. He will be working overtime. So dinner will be very late tonight because I will have to take the kids to martial arts and THEN come home and start dinner. That's kind of a hassle, but all in all, I'm feeling very optimistic right now about the day. Thank you all for your encouragement to just go and do it. You were right!
Progress as of today: -0.5 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!
Sorry I made you blush with my Fantasia party and then the strip club, hee, hee!! I'm really not typically interested in going to those places but with a large group of girls it is good for a laugh every now and then!!
Have a great day, I hope you can motivate yourself to get to that gym today!!!!
And I just noticed the beginning of your last entry - I feel the same way, I have to wonder how bad I really want this weight loss too. Quite frankly I'm pretty much comfortable with myself, but societal pressures make me feel like I have to be thinner. Some days I'm really motivated and other days I just want my food!
Good luck with the stairstepper tomorrow. That's a really good workout, but that machine is my nemesis. I do it often, but it is so tough.
I'm glad you did finally make it to the gym. And even if you think you would have been better off with the fancy gym, any exercise, on any kind of exercise machine is better than none. Yay! You get to go to a gym now! :-)
You may have inspired me to go to the gym I call the "do it yourself" gym--nearby--it's in what looks like a shed and you have to key in a passcode to get in. It has a phone. I went there once a long time ago (stuck my head in and wasn't impressed so never went back). It has to at least have a decent spot to do some bench pressing and flyes:-)
Just curious, did you have to sign a release/waiver for your gym? I actually had to sign a waiver before they gave me the passcode a while ago.
Also I'd encourage you to take some kind of tour of the place next time you go in. I think the management usually expects you to do that. Don't want to see you hurting yourself and being out of commission.
All that said, you kicked a** girlie!
Have a good one!
Ugh. I think that's the best word to describe yesterday. I ate so much Irish soda bread yesterday that I truly felt sick to my stomach. But did that stop me from eating more? Nooo. I have to wonder how badly I really want this weight loss. Maybe I WANT to be a fat person, I don't know.
I did eat a few of the kids' chocolates, but there are still plenty left. And they are for the kids.
I hope to start making the gym part of my routine starting tomorrow (Monday). That's the plan, anyway. I anticipate tomorrow's weigh-in being higher than EVER.
Progress as of today: 0 lbs lost so far, only 13.5 lbs to go!
New starts are a great place to begin....I wish you the best!
I also had a bad day yesturday. I went to a b-day party where there was NO option of healthy food, urgh!! The party was from 12:00-3:00 and I was starving. I find it very frustrating when people have nothing healthy for me to eat. They had sandwiches that were all on white bread & white pasta salades!! I have eaten white bread or white pasta since I started this and I was really annoyed that I had no choice, I either had to eat some or starve!! I didn't eat alot, 3 quarters of a sandwich, a scoop or so of salade and some cucumbers. (oh they had a tiny veggie tray and water, at least that was healthy!!) Anyway, once I got home I was just out of control hungry and I ate to much and very badly the rest of the day. I decided I wasn't even going to try to total my calories and I would just move on today and start fresh.
I hope you have a better day today and enjoy your first trip to the gym!! I really think getting back to a gym is going to get you back to a positive place!! Hang in there Donkey, I know you can get back on track!
I have been a Busy Donkey these past couple of days -- today included! When my Husband has his days off, it throws my routine into a scramble. Yesterday, we spent all morning and most of the afternoon trying to make purchasing decisions for materials to repair our old house (that we need to sell). Then we came home and as soon as both kids were home, I rushed off to martial arts with them. They are enjoying it so far. I'm glad that they are getting exercise in. My son (who is so thin) hates to exercise, but my daughter (6) has all of a sudden started EATING a LOT. Not that it's bad, because she's in for a growth spurt I believe. But I was a chubby child and suffered horribly for it. And I just want to make sure that intake/output are balanced for my daughter. I'm also hoping that martial arts will give her the self-confidence that I never had (and still lack). As long as they enjoy it... Once it's not fun any more, then we'll move on, if we get to that point.
Today I am helping out in my daughter's classroom for 1.5 hours. Then I have to go grocery shopping for fresh fruit, milk and some kind of St Patrick's Day treat(s) for the kids. My son made some kind of Leprechaun trap so I think it would be fun to surprise him tomorrow morning with some goodies in his contraption. I'm hoping to find chocolate coins, but I think they will have to settle for a box of Lucky Charms cereal. Wah wah...
But at least I know I won't be tempted by the Lucky Charms. Those chocolates might not last too long around me (unfortunately). It was hard enough not to have a big ol' slice of the berry pie my Husband made last night. I managed to keep the calories to around 1100 (too low, but did not exercise). I'm ashamed to admit that in the past, I have often binged on the kids' treats. How bad is that? :(
Please be patient with me working into a routine to working out at the gym. I know by Monday I will be there exercising. I"m looking forward to my weigh-in on Monday morning. Gosh I hope I can stay on track over the weekend. Weekends are SO hard for me....
AFTERNOON UPDATE: I have come back from my errands. My daughter was crying when I left the school. That was hard. She misses me. She wanted me to take the bus with her this morning, but I told her I'd be there at 10a.
I bought treats for the Leprechaun Trap. A bag full of golden chocolate eggs, a box of Lucky Charms, and a box of chocolate glazed doughnut holes with green sprinkles on them. I will tell you now, I could easily eat all of those treats up. Yes, even the box of Lucky Charms. Maybe not the whole box, but I can eat cereal like people eat popcorn.
You know what though? It's time for me to be the adult here. The treats are for the KIDS, and not for me. I would be horrified if they ate everything all at once, so why should it be ok for me to do that very same thing? It's not.
Progress as of today: 0 lbs lost so far, only 13.5 lbs to go!
With the growth spurt and just getting more active, she should do fine!
I just think that the new price structure is outrageous.
I to want my daughter to have great self esteem. I don't really know why I grew up feeling so insecure and still now as an adult I have terribly low self confidence. Mine wasn't due to weight, maybe it was because I was so painfully shy and timid, who knows!! All I know is I want my kids to have loads of confidence. For some reason it seems like girls often suffer more with the low self esteem. So far my daughter seems to have more than enough confidence, I just hope that doesn't change once she hits her teens!!
Good luck staying away from all of those treats! My hubby bought my daughter chocolate icecream as a treat. I don't usually have trouble resisting icecream but he bought Haagen-dazs and it smells sooo good! I hope they eat it before I loose my will power!! It has 280 calories in 1 half of a cup, brutal!!
that's a really cute idea to suprise your son with treats in the thing he made. I used to love it when my mom did stuff like that. Like she would put a note in my lunch that just said 'have a great day, i love you'. Moms are so creative. :-)
Oh, and I could easily eat a whole box of cereal. I've done it before, and it's easier than you might think. So watch out for that!
I think it's a great idea to encourage your daughter to take martial arts and other sports. I agree, it's a good way to help make sure she stays in shape as she gets older, without putting the focus on her weight (heaven knows girls don't need any encouragement to do THAT!). And you're right, it will also be good for her self-esteem, which is just as important, if not more. I was always thin as a child, but I might as well have been overweight because I was always so self-conscious and embarrassed about my physical appearance. Honestly, since I started running, the biggest change in me has been mental, not physical. Although I did lose a few pounds, I never really achieved the really slim profile which I wanted (I guess I have those J-Lo genes!). But I appreciate my body for what I know it can do, if that makes any sense. I guess I know I'm fit and in good shape, and that's more important to me now than just looking really skinny.
Well, last night, after I added my Update, I had another slip-up. Bad Donkey! Afterwards, I tried to express to my Husband how disgusted I was with myself but he did not understand. Men just have a different way of seeing things, I guess. I know he tried to help me feel better.
So --- today, we went and joined a gym. I confess that I just could NOT pick up the phone and call to ask questions, so I had my Husband do it. He's better on the phone with people anyway, and he loves to be my hero. After getting rates from both the Fancy Gym and the Basic Gym, I decided that we should sign up with the Basic Gym. Price-wise, I just could not justify the high enrollment fee for us at the Fancy Gym ($380! with monthly dues at $120). Basic Gym was $60 enrollment fee and $32 a month for both of us to join. We both agree that this will be satisfactory for now (until we get our home gym set up). And for me, it's not that much $$ lost if Husband decides he doesn't want to exercise after all.
The Fancy Gym would have been nice because there's stuff to do for the kids and because they are open 24/7 and there's a swimming pool (exercise classes cost extra). But honestly, I like the gym to be just for me. It's my "Me Time", even if I have to get up at the butt-crack of dawn to go without kids in tow.
We will be going shopping for supplies for repairs on the old house. I am anxious to get it up for sale ASAP. Not that it will sell in the depressed real estate market, but just to have it done and "open for business", so to speak. It will be a great deal of stress off my mind, that's for sure.
Progress as of today: 0 lbs lost so far, only 13.5 lbs to go!
I think you made the right choice of gym. This way you won't be nagging the kids and husband to use the gym. And I know what you mean about enjoying your time to yourself. People are always trying to hook me up with other runners, but I kind of like this time alone. And I'm not quite fit enough to carry on a conversation while running. And of course there's also that shyness...
That's nice that your hubby likes to be your "hero". My husband is also that way, he loves to fix all of my little problems when he can. He is actually rather nurturing for a man especially since he is a real "mans man". He only shows his big teddy bear side to the kids and myself though (and his and my Mom to some extent also). He has a very protective nature to him when it comes to females, I like that about him, reminds me of my own Dad. He also likes to take care of my Mom since my Dad passed away, my Mom adores him. They often butt heads because they are both so outspoken but they have alot of respect and love for one another. My Mom takes alot of comfort in him because he reminds her so much of my Dad, even in his less enduring traits, ha,ha!!
Thank-you for the nice comments you left me on my diary, I really appreciate all of your positive feedback and encouragment!!
I also know how you feel with the "me time" at the gym. I love to go to the gym and have that couple of hours to myself. Even though I am physically exerting myself, its so relaxing in a way to just listen to tunes and work out and not have to worry about taking care of my childrens needs. Don't get me wrong I love being with my kids but we all need a break for our own sanity, alone time is so important!!
Enjoy your new gym!
Believe me, I thought of quite a few retorts I could have made ("and your breath stinks of those cigarillos you smoke!") but I just wasn't expecting this sudden insult and was too shocked to respond with anything right away!
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The exercise must be doing you so much good. You sound a lot brighter. Good for you!! This gym membership is probably just what you need to make the difference. YAY!!!
Horn_Of_Plenty on 03/28/2007:
i'm so glad you're enjoying the gym!
Justine6Robert3 on 03/28/2007:
Good for you getting to the gym Donkey!! It sounds like your spirits are good. That's nice that you have alot of bike trails around your house, I hope that my next house has the same. We usually drive to a nearby conservation area to go walking with the kids. Kirt and I were saying we would like to go bike riding, its been years since I rode my bike outside!!!
Good luck with your husband getting on board, he may come around in his own time once he see's how good your feeling! I have been packing Kirt's lunches this week with lots of healthy food and snacks. He event went to the grocery store on his own and bought all kinds of fruits and veggies for himself to snack on!!! I'm loving this, I do hope he sticks with it.