The wonderful thing about books & libraries is that whatever crisis you're going through, someone has probably already been through it and written a book about it.
My library never has any of the books that I want at the moment that I want it - I usually have to do an inter-library loan request - but I think this was meant to be, because I found a book yesterday written by a woman who has gone through this whole debate about coloring her hair! I hope you realize, it's not really about coloring the hair, but rather, one's approach and acceptance of the aging process.
I would have started the book last night, but I also checked out another book about aging, but more so towards the end of life -- and I still have the book I held onto, to finish up.
I admit that I'm fascinated by the whole process of aging. I think what really started it was my memberships to a couple of FB groups for "weight training over 50". It's mostly men, but there are quite a few women. However, some of the women are trying to look older than they really are. And that's fine if that's how they want to carry themselves, but I see some of these pictures and think that they're trying *too* hard - it looks so unnatural that it's almost embarrassing for them (although they obviously don't see it for themselves).
Back to my friend who got an old-lady haircut, I believe, from what my daughter told me, that she got this hair style for convenience. As her hair was getting greyer, it was also changing the texture, and this new haircut will be easier for her to manage/control. I get that. And her hair won't change any of the admiration that I still have for her.
So just as I made peace with this whole hair thing, my 19 year old daughter comes bouncing in with a box of hair-dye, wanting to change her hair and her life -- "happiness in a box". So I asked her how come she didn't get me a box - after all, I want to be happy too - but then I was OK that she did not get me one too.
(More to say in my responses to your comments in yesterday's entry...)
Goals:
I'll recap some thoughts, and then I want to talk to you all about something I'm having an awful time processing, and I don't know where to go with these feelings and thoughts.
RECAP:
I moved my evening exercise bike yesterday afternoon and it has made all of the difference in the world! Wow, I should have done that months ago. I can see the TV better, and I have more room for my weight bench and my morning exercise bike. I have not yet really done weights on the weight bench, but it's on my list of possibilities today.
I was most productive until about 10:30a today. Now I've had a breather for about an hour. I still have stuff to do on my list, but I've gotten done what I wanted/needed to do. The rest is optional, if I am looking for something to do. This includes weights and yoga (easy yoga, DVD at home).
Beautiful sunny day, cooler temperatures. Need to enjoy these days before winter...
OK, now on to what has been bothering me.
My daughter's best friend's mom is about my age, give or take a few years. Seriously, I'm 49, and I don't think she's much older, if she IS older. She might actually be 46, 47...
Anyway, she has had this beautiful full head of naturally curly hair, very dark brown or black, but like the rest of us, the grey hairs have been coming in, but I'd say at least half of her hair is still dark.
So my daughter tells me yesterday -- yes, this is how long I've been chewing on this, I was so shocked! - that Mrs. B got an old lady haircut! Rather than this beautiful mane of shoulder-length hair, now she has a shorter, bowl-cut, cap-like hairstyle! Because her hair is so full and curly, though, it looks like a short afro, almost. My daughter says that the shorter hair makes Mrs. B look like a little old-lady, with her hair looking much greyer with the short style.
Let me first say, there is nothing wrong with short hair styles for women. They can be cute, stylish, cutting-edge, etc. But to have a hairstyle that makes you look older, that brings out the grey.... I cannot handle this. And this is from someone who I've always admired as being modern, gutsy, forward-thinking.
I've been struggling with whether to color my hair or let it go grey. I have only grey in the front, framing my face. The rest of it is still brown. I stopped dying it because my hair is thinning out and I was afraid that the harsh chemicals were causing more harm than good. But now, seeing one of my PEERS turning into a "little old lady" --- ACK! I'm freaking out!
Please understand, I have no problem with grey hair. If my whole head were grey or even 50-50, I'd be OK with it. I don't like where I have these whisps and patches of grey. Once I have more grey, I do not think I'll have a problem keeping it grey.
I know some of you here are older than I, and therefore, have had the experience and wisdom of having gone through this already. I guess emotionally, I didn't think this would happen for another few years??? Why would anyone willing want to look older than they are?
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
That is to say, I'm sure her feelings do get hurt and stuff, but at the end of the day, she's very comfortable in her own skin. At least that's how she comes across to me.
I also like your comment about how it takes away the natural look away. Yep 100%
maybe she was just sick of all her hair so she cut it in the summer for ease? for instance, the only real reason i keep my hair short is that it's not really wavy or totally straight and i have trouble maintaining it, so i cut it because it's easy for me to get ready in the mornings. that's the reason.
maybe she did the same.
i am almost 37 and do not have many grays. i started getting them a couple years ago, but, they have stayed for now at minimum. i was dying my hair with highlights to cover them up, but now i don't care again because for now it's just a few.
I suppose I should embrace my grey highlights. I think that's what I should do.
However, I do OK with a cute bob, just under the chin, as long as it's all one length. I've been toying about going back to that, but for now, I'm going to keep it long.
And if I don't, just do a shampoo, and I'm back to Donkey brown (with grey).
I might pick up a few kits of this stuff and give it a try...
Well... I was writing, and then the page decided to update itself and I lost everything I wrote....
I slept in this morning - a gift to myself - so I did not weigh in, but I know I will definitely weigh in next Saturday, to mark the end of Summer (in my mind at least), the beginning of the last trimester of 2019, and set some goals for myself.
I often realize that it's been about a month since my birthday, and I feel as though I have not made the most of any of the days that have since passed. Most of my time, it would seem, is consumed by the mundane.
I do not have much planned for today, other than to go to the library. I need a new book to read at night. I'm not enthralled with what I'm reading right now, and my husband says he'd like to go too, so that's something we can do together. Other projects:
My laundry is done washing, which means it's time to start my day!
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
i never have really thought of the year in trimesters till you wrote it here. what an interesting view - and of course reality.
i can totally relate to your feelings of mundane and not making progress. i have spent the summer just trying not to overdo and as you know i laid of cardio a lot in order to not hurt myself but now i'm feeling a struggle again to push forward.
i see you don't love the book you are reading! what a coincidence...mine is starting to get repetitive on the subject matter and i'm not even 50% through so i will prob start skipping around a few pages here and there and then return it. same with the next book...i don't think i'll read the whole thing (the nazi story you read).
Had a terrible time sleeping last night. I kept dreaming that my alarm was going off! The first time, at 1:27a, I realized I hadn't put on my FitBit - left it in the charger, so I got up and put it on, but I woke up at least 3 more times thinking my alarm was going off, and it wasn't.
Yoga was fun last night, but I wore the wrong shirt, so I was a bit uncomfortable. Also, because I had my daughter with me, I chose a different area, so on the other side of me, I had a man, and that was a little distracting (not that he was handsome or anything, but rather, that I was more self-conscious, which kind of defeats the whole purpose).
There was a lot of hissing and growling with the cats, too. Last month, it was also noticeable, but I thought it was because the weather was so hot and humid. I don't know if there's bully cats or if having all these strange people in the room is stressing out the cats. My daughter said it was all too "Lord of the Flies", which was sad to think about.
I will try to remember to weigh in tomorrow morning, but TOM is about to start, and so... my mindful eating results might not be quite so evident (if there are any actual results) due to hormone issues. I'm not expecting to see anything, because...
I put on a pair of fall/winter pants today, because the weather is cool enough, and they still fit. Not baggy or saggy or any signs that I've lost weight or tighted up... Well, that's OK, because I'm supposed to be on maintenance, anyway, right? Right???
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
But I kid you not, there is a women's retreat not too far from me that offers Horse Yoga. Yep.
I'm not really a horse person.
good to hear your pants are fitting...that's a good thing, Jdonk!
it was cooler here today too. If the weather stays this way for awhile, it will be nice (upper 70's,low 80's)
Signed my husband and I up for the Library Chair Yoga on September 11th. I registered him first, so as to be sure he had his seat reserved, but there's still enough room for me too, so I did it, too.
Had reservations about taking more time off, just for Chair Yoga, but being that it will be 9/11, I already know that I'm probably going to welcome anything that is positive, calming, and uplifting. It's a difficult day.
Cat Yoga tonight with the daughter! I hope she likes it! I want to introduce her to George, if he's still there. I'm quite smitten with him. He's orange.
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
In Library Chair Yoga, he's in the minority. In Veterans' Chair Yoga, I'm usually the only gal.
and that's nice you are doing something positive on 9/11.
Unfortunately, I did not have the opportunity to log in last night. I had planned to ride my bike, workout 100% with my weight bench, and then log in. I was so tired that I could hardly finish the bike ride! Went to bed early, but woke up at 2:30a ready to start the day. That is too early, so I tossed and turned for a long time... I must have gone back to sleep because when the alarm went off at 5am, I was so tired. But I got up anyway, because I still wanted to start the day. The best way to shake that sleepy feeling is to get up and get started.
So now I have the extra time to log in here.
It would have done no good to log in and write about yesterday anyway, because it was pretty much the same as Monday. I'm so frustrated with my boss. He's usually out at closings, that seem to be taking longer than usual, so I'm thinking he stops and shops or goes home before coming back to the office. When he is in the office, he doesn't want to work. But he doesn't want to go home. He wants to sit around and chat, joke, gossip, etc. He almost had Male Co-Worker write his attorney letters for him yesterday! (I realized I could have done it, but then I would have been way far behind in my work.) And I feel bad for our clients! They shouldn't be getting bad news from one of us - that's for the attorney to do! That's what they're paying him for!
Monday night I did a brief run with the weight bench, just trying out different settings, without using any weights. I was very clumsy, so I put off doing a real workout, but as I wrote above, that didn't happen last night. I need to move around some furniture so that I have more room. Tried to do that this morning, but it's going to require more effort than I was ready to put out this morning. Besides, then I would have had the time to write here this morning, and I really did want to check in.
Please know that if I do not write or comment, I'm still reading your entries and thinking of you all.
Anyway, speaking of clumsy, the yoga studio from last Sunday's epic is having a FREE session where all 5 (or 6) trainees are teaching one session -- I think where they are switching off during the session. Sunday's drill sargeant yoga instructor is included (of course, as she is one of the trainees). I decided to pass on this, because if I do decide to attend the other sessions, I would like it to be with one instructor at a time. So I will wait for the next free instructor session in September, and decide if there will be a Chapter 2 to my Yoga Adventures.
The yoga studio owner is offering a 5-session ticket for $100 on meditation. The sessions are 1 to 1.5 hours long... Unfortunately, they are in the late afternoon on Sundays, and that's family dinner, and calm down time for me, before I start the workweek. (Yes, I need that down time on Sunday, starting around dinner, to mentally prepare for Monday. Otherwise I'm a wreck of anxiety.)
Chair Yoga for Veterans is canceled for September, so I'm going to sign the husband and myself up for the other chair yoga offered at the library. I'll have to miss half a day, but if nobody else wants to work at work, then I think I can take some time off too.
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
I like your plans regarding yoga both regular and chair. I do hope you will enjoy that afternoon of it with your hubby.
I also like to have down time at home and it really helps me relax as well.
Yoga Disaster Afterthoughts:
The yoga studio is 2 doors down from this really good Mexican restaurant. I hadn't had lunch before class, because yoga on a full stomach is not a wise choice. Oh my word, after leaving the studio, as the cool air hit my brain --- so did the wonderful aroma of tortillas, salsa, Mexican spices. Oh my....
(I mentioned this in my comments) One of the first things the yoga instructor said was, "Yoga is not a workOUT, it is a work-IN". Trust me when I say: THIS WAS A WORKOUT.
Today was a bit stressful at work. Again, people not showing up to work, phones start ringing, etc.
You know, it's OK if my boss wants to start pulling back a little bit and not being at the office as much, but then he needs to set boundaries, because otherwise I get stuck doing twice as much work, sending out extension requests on deadlines, because he isn't in the office.
He's not admitting to anyone -- in fact, I've heard him deny that he's pulling back. But truth be told, he's just not here as much as I need him to be. Well, I guess I'll just keep on extending out deadlines, asking for more time.
Got marvellous sleep last night. Wasn't too sore from yoga, although I did feel some aches in my neck and my left hamstring and my right hip flexor. I'm going to try to use my new weight bench tonight, but if I don't get to it, then tomorrow night might be a better option. We'll see.
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
Probiotics, greek yogurt, and kale/broccoli will also add to the general atmosphere of the class.
I had to find the Mad TV Sunrise Yoga class clip for you... https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=y_1NajgvvaY
i'm glad you aren't too sore from yoga and mexican does smell nice!
i'll be using my weight bench tonight also :)
(I thought that my free yoga class deserved its own entry, even if it's still Sunday...)
Donkey Yoga Adventures, Chapter 1
Have you ever gotten yourself into something and then realized, I do not belong here -- whether it's the deep end of the pool or a really bad movie or the wrong gender restroom -- have you had that happen?
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
Which reminds me, first thing the instructor said: "Yoga is not a work-OUT, it's a work-IN." Um..., no sweetie, this was a workout. Trust me...
I still think it's wonderful that you tried the class and stayed. i KNOW that your legs look a lot better than you are describing them!
also, the class does sound hard. it's ok to check things out and see if it's for you. even if it was hard for your daughter, she'd have it as a learning experience i'd say.
i miss the days of HOT YOGA when i used to do it. now i do not have time for that, really. it was challenging and many of the poses were also for 1 minute.
i'm glad you did it. you'll have to let us know if you do end up getting sore from the class or not.
after this class, maybe take a couple days to see if it's worth going back. it's sorta nice that they are free. nicer if they benefit you. i do think that there's so many types of yoga/teachers/studios.
also, you can figure you the style of yoga you like and see if any nearby studios have that type....
i'm glad you went!
But please go and do your free classes, you might like it better especially if you know more of what to expect.
Oh how much I appreciate my weekend mornings! I didn't realize it until I compared this morning with yesterday's morning (with legal clinic). I love doing the legal clinic, but I confess that it does make my weekends feel shorter.
So today is a typical Sunday morning - with the exception of doing laundry today instead of yesterday - EXCEPT that .... a local yoga studio is offering a free yoga class today at noon, and I want to go, but it's really scary for me to do this. My daughter had to work today or I would drag her with me. As this is regular yoga, this is not something that my husband can do with me. I have no one else to call on to go with me..... and actually, that's OK because **IF** I do this---- like with the Cat Yoga --- it's something I want to do by myself, for myself.
It's funny that I write this, because this is the yoga studio I intend to join eventually. They are offering 6-7 free classes, taught by yogi trainees (so folks training to be certified yoga instructors) about once or twice a month. Today is the first one.
So you KNOW I will be agonizing over this, all morning.
MORNING EDIT: So I just learned that the Catholic yoga at my church is now going to be a regular thing -- Tuesay and Thursday MORNINGS. So that is no longer an option for me, whether or not I was going to try to attend it again.
I did a little more poking around and learned that the form of yoga for today's free class might be too advanced for me. I also should arrive early to fill out paperwork, since I'm not already a member. Neither of those bits of information are encouraging, lol. IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS STRESSFUL!
This week's goals:
it's nice to have your own passions and hobbies and now that you hubby cannot do certain things with you, it's important you challenge yourself still!
Crazy day... Friday was crazy at work. It would help if co-workers would actually show up for work. Way too many people taking time off lately, and nobody seems to care.
Today was legal clinic, so no time to post in the morning. Left my cell phone at home and while I missed having it - may have been able to post here from the clinic in between clients -- it was actually kind of nice to be free of it.
Came home and found my weight bench put together! Oh my is it so much nicer than the very old, basic bench I have. I am looking forward to using it!
I did not weigh in this morning. I had already gotten dressed for my morning workout when I remembered. I said to myself, "I don't have time to play scale games today" and went downstairs to start my bike ride.
Recap on this past week's goals:
Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only -0.5 lbs to go!
I'm going to keep trying.
good for you on going to the legal clinic and doing something extremely constructive on the weekend. i applaud you because i know it's a personal commitment and your choice and i think it's great to be able to do something more with yourself and lend your talents/skills to this group!
congrats on the weight bench! you will be happy! i should have bought the weight bench that holds the ankles/feet for situps...i totally wish i had bought that one! for now though, i get my feet under my couch and it holds them just fine...
100 ounces of water may not be necessary for you. remember it's just a cool sounding number. if you eat fruit / veggies with water, that adds in too. when i visited my naturally thin (thinner than me) friend in Paris this year, she drank/ate very little throughout the day until a main meal for dinner!!!! she didn't like to be inconvienced by needing the bathroom all day (her schedule is very much on the go for work and travels a bit - plus she has use of only one hand so it can be understand why she would want to simplify certain things). what i mean is, i'm not saying to be like her (i personally don't like her style of really just one main meal a day), but i'm saying humans have lived a long time without exactly 100 ounces and that you will be ok....also, she would drinks LOTS of tea at home in evening since she wouldn't be going anywhere and could use the bathroom easily at home LOL.
I also am working more on sleep lately ...my plans are bigger and have to wake up early for them lately...so today i was grateful to sleep in a bit / go to bed early last night.
i feel i def have better workouts when i recover more with the extra sleep.. for my body, i think 8 hours per night is best. like you, i do like more than 7 hours.
It wasn't really OMAD, but 2 very light snacks, and then just one meal. So snack 1 might be a small apple and a hard boiled egg. Snack 2 might be a small garden salad and an ounce of cheese. Then the Meal would be a real meal, with say, a piece of dark chocolate for dessert.
I am going to keep working on sleep as a specific goal this week.
her bigger meal would be full and balanced.
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I totally understand the joy of finding just the right book when it's needed.....so uplifting....and probably why the internet is also so addicting...type it in...and there it is....but a book, when you find it...is extra special.
happy-1 on 08/26/2019:
If you really have to buy a box, I’m really happy with the new loreal anti brass shades
Horn_Of_Plenty on 08/26/2019:
yeah, your hair is very fine and easy to manage. i don't share the same type of hair as you...i like your hair in all your photos it looks really nice long or the chin length.
totally agree about the books...lots of advice / authors in same situations or same emotions. books help me a lot to mentally "toughen up" or to expose myself to tough people/tough situations.
you've gotta share what you read about the woman & her "hair color crisis" as i'd like to know anything of interest..
i totally understand your friend and the chopping of her hair. after all, i did it myself. if my hair was thicker/smoother/more naturally fine with more keratin to keep it smoother, i'd have probably not cut it. but it tends to get damaged as i used to put it up a lot for exercise and i had a lot of split ends. i don't see myself struggling with long hair any time soon, either.
i've been getting more sleep like you also and i also am restarting weights tonight (took Sunday off / weekend off) as to relax a little more and give myself some extra down time to "feel good" in my attempt to not run myself into the ground (it worked).
grannyannie on 08/26/2019:
I quit colouring my hair when I was in my early 60s'. As for ageing, I think I was my most fit at age 60.