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Donkey - Wednesday Apr 11, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 144.0

APRIL CHALLENGE MINUTES TOTAL: 125 (see below) + 15 min more of shoveling = 140 minutes. ((Didn't do more than just the shoveling.))

OK, I took a sneak peek cheat at my weigh-in, and I'm down to about 139-140. So at least my efforts are paying off. Now I just have to get back to my "starting point" so I can start losing the weight I wanted to lose in the first place.

I cannot believe it is snowing here. In April. Snow. Me shovel. Me shovel twice (or at least I foresee having to shovel again). Bleah. Funny thing is that a couple of neighbors were outside cutting their grass yesterday. At least I had enough smarts not to do THAT.

I was supposed to go shopping today for my daughter's birthday cake and presents for tomorrow (she will be 7!). Unfortunately, this weather is not cooperating, and I don't know if I dare risk driving to the store to shop for her. She needs goodies to take to school tomorrow to, for her birthday snack. Ugh....

Since I have logged on here, I am going to sub-total my exercise minutes, so that when I have to go out and shovel again, I can just add the time on to the sum. Let's see: 85 minutes on the crosstrainer + 25 minutes weight training + 15 minutes shoveling = 125 minutes so far.

Progress as of today: -5.5 lbs lost so far, only 19 lbs to go!

amanda8419 on 04/11/2007:
I am a driver. Im on call for the medical center 88 hours, 7 days a week. It just doesnt have any benefits and the pay depends on how much I get called in. I get a base pay of like 620 every two weeks before taxes, then when i punch in i get another 20.00. if im there for more then 2 hours i get 10 an hour. so the pay ranges from 485 every two weeks to 700 every two weeks. i just want something more stable, with a real schedule, benefits, bonuses, and regular pay lol

hollybelle on 04/11/2007:
Great exercise. GOOD Donkey! GOOD Donkey!

borntocry on 04/11/2007:
Oh, well done! So what's your starting point - 136?

Thanks for your comment. Yes, I think reminding myself of my calorie philosophy really helped prevent the huge binge which normally ensues when some unexpected hurdle comes my way. It's crazy, really, how the realisation that I've gone 10 or 20 or 100 calories over my "limit" can spark an out-of-control eating spiral. This morning it didn't even really matter that I was at 1600 or so calories for yesterday, whereas if I'd eaten myself into oblivion I would have woken up feeling so sick and disgusted with myself.

WorkingIt2 on 04/11/2007:
How nice to see the scale drop!

Justine6Robert3 on 04/11/2007:
Yay, all that effort is moving the scales, good for you! Great job on the exercise again! Shovelling, your weather sounds blah also. I'm soooo tired of snow. At least there isn't enough for me to have to shovel, at least not yet who knows what kind of "Spring" weather we will have tomorrow!! At least you got alot of exercise in, shovelling is definetly exercise!!

Keep up the great working, I'm so proud of how excellent your doing with your exercises! Happy Birthday to your daughter, how quickly they grow!!

greengirl on 04/12/2007:
Well done Donkey. You are really getting back on track :0)

Donkey - Tuesday Apr 10, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 144.0

TUESDAY APRIL CHALLENGE MINUTES: (let's see if I can remember all that I did today...) 65 minutes on the crosstrainer + 30 minutes on the treadmill + 25 minutes weight training = 120 minutes.

I would have gone for a bike ride, but I had to go to the library today to return a book. My leg muscles were sore this morning and they were very sore this afternoon after my workout. I could tell, when I was at the library, when I bent down to read titles on the lower shelves. Yowza! That's a GREAT feeling!

Unfortunately, we are due for either some nasty rain or some awful (dare I say it?) SNOW tomorrow here. Despite the cold weather, this is all part of global warming. You heard it here first from Donkey -- remember that! I am so sick of this weather.

Progress as of today: -5.5 lbs lost so far, only 19 lbs to go!

sharklover on 04/10/2007:
wow, that's some great exercise you did today! Kudos to you!

Seriously, what happened to summer? I think we are all over this weather!

wantabfit on 04/10/2007:
Donkey...thanks for the encouragement...your doing great as well...i run outside and in during the week. I just finished training for my first marathon i completed it in feb and i'm just running for fun till i start training for another one in june :)...i'm excited to put some miles on my bike too and i agree this weather is YUCK!

borntocry on 04/11/2007:
Hi Donkey! Thanks for the comment you left me. I must disagree with you - your library outfit was really pretty funny! Man, you've been working out a lot, though. You're right, it's great to feel it in your muscles afterwards. I can't remember when I last had that happen. I need to get a good workout today or I will feel like such a slob!

I agree with you on the global warming thing! I can't believe how many people are going around joking about how they can't wait for global warming to kick in so we can finally have some nice weather. At least I hope they're joking...

Donkey - Monday Apr 09, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 144.0

MONDAY APRIL CHALLENGE MINUTES: 70 minutes playing with kids + 65 minutes crosstrainer + 25 minutes stair-stepper + 25 minutes weight training = 185 minutes. ((Yes, my thighs are hurting a little bit right now. It is good.)

I am back from my mothers'. It went reasonably well, although I did eat too much candy. I did not get in any activity save the 35 minutes it took me to go outside and hide Easter eggs, only to have my daughter discover that I am the Easter bunny. So the bright side is that we won't have to have an egg hunt next year because the "secret's out".

As you can see, my weigh is up (AGAIN) and significantly, as well. I'm not happy about this.

Progress as of today: -5.5 lbs lost so far, only 19 lbs to go!

hollybelle on 04/09/2007:
Aw - today's a new day. How old is disillustioned daughter? I remember those days - fun!

Hang in there. Would it help to mix things up somehow - like changing up exercise routines or lowering carbs or something? You are very dedicated to exercise. Sometimes a change of routine makes a difference.

geevee on 04/09/2007:
Just because your daughter knows that you're the Easter Bunny doesn't mean the end to hiding eggs by any means! 13yr. old Jerryka and 12yr. old Wyatt nagged me and Billy about getting up early to hide the eggs. They simply love to look for them.

Then they asked which of us was the Easter Bunny who left them all that nice dark chocolate and truffles! We go through the same thing at Christmas time with Santa. TYhey constantly wheedle us about which presents they can open on Christmas Eve and then which ones will be from "Santa".

Childhood is SO short!

Justine6Robert3 on 04/09/2007:
That's to bad you got caught hiding the eggs. I almost got caught hiding them in the house after the kids had gone to bed also. Taylor (my 6 yr old daughter) woke up to use the bathroom and couldn't resist peeking downstairs to see if the bunny had come yet!! Fortunetly she didn't see me hiding them though! She told me she "accidently" seen some eggs and presents from the bunny. After she got done in the bathroom she sat cross legged in the middle of my bedroom floor with bed head and her eyes half open and said "Mommy, I'm not tired, is it time to look for Easter eggs now"? This was at around 1:00 am!! It really was cute, she just gets soooo excited about these things (X-mas, Easter etc) that she has a really hard time getting to sleep and staying asleep.

Its to bad your daughter caught you, she's still so young to not believe in the Easter bunny!! I agree with geevee though, you can still have easter egg hunts for her. We still hide eggs for my nieces when they come over who don't believe in the Easter bunny. They are 15 yrs old and nearly 12 yrs old and they still like to look for chocolate eggs with my little ones and their youngest sister!!

Don't be so hard on yourself, its hard to be completely behaved on the holidays. You have to allow yourself a little wiggle room. You'll get back on track with the food and exercise. I know I found myself indulging in some chocolate eggs myself! I had them all dumped out on my kitchen table while I was hiding them around the house and I was thinking look at all that yummy chocolate sitting right in front of me. I couldn't resist having some, but I'm not going to beat myself up about it, what good would that do!

You've been doing so well with your exercises lately and getting to the gym, you have to give yourself some credit for all of your effort!!! I know you can get back on track!

I hope your day gets better!

greengirl on 04/09/2007:
We dont really 'do' the Easter Bunny over here in the UK but I remember how upset my eldest son was when he found out I was the tooth fairy!! It's such a shame when they lose that bit of innocence. I think we all fell for the chocolate this year!!

Justine6Robert3 on 04/09/2007:
Way to go Donkey, you kicked butt with your exercises today!!! I bet your thighs are soar but you likely relieved a good deal of stress and negative thoughts also!! 70 quality min playing with the kids also, I bet they really enjoyed the "Mommy fun time"!

girliegirl6486 on 04/09/2007:
Awwww your daughter found out the secret! Random story time - My dad was telling me this funny story over the weekend - he said one year after he was working an overnight shift really late, he got home and got to sleep for about three hours before I wake him up on Easter morning and say THE EASTER BUNNY CAME!!! My dad said at that moment he was thinking "Oh...f*ck the Easter Bunny." LOL I just thought it was hilarious. He said he got up anyway with me and was like falling over because he was so tired. My poor dad! That's why I love him though :)

borntocry on 04/10/2007:
Hey there, Easter Bunny! Good job with the exercise. Very impressive!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/10/2007:
sorry to hear about your weight...but you do know what it takes to get it down again!

Donkey - Saturday Apr 07, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 140.0

FRIDAY CHALLENGE MINUTES: 65 min crosstrainer + 25 min stair-stepper = 90 minutes.

Sad Donkey. Bad Donkey. We're going to my mom's for Easter, so I will update when I return.

Progress as of today: -1.5 lbs lost so far, only 15 lbs to go!

hollybelle on 04/07/2007:
Why Donkey sad? Why Donkey bad? Happy Easter.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/07/2007:
why sad donkey, bad donkey! go have a good time celebrating easter! it's great you made an entry at all today...plus....good minutes on Friday! everyone deserves to celebrate the holidays. enjoy the evening!

borntocry on 04/08/2007:
Hey Donkey! What happened? You're too hard on yourself, girl! Does anyone stop after just one slice of pizza?! I know I never have!

Donkey - Friday Apr 06, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 140.0

THURSDAY CHALLENGE MINUTES: 112 minutes (probably more but what the heck)

Went off the deep end yesterday with eating. It was just a hungry day! I was hungrier at breakfast, so I added an apple. I was hungry at lunch so I had pizza AND chili AND Easter candy. Dinner was normal, but then I had a total feast afterwards. Tried popcorn with butter first. Then went and had another huge piece of pan pizza (part of what I had for lunch). I was just hungry! DANG!

I still have the crick on the right side of my neck. I believe it is caused by stress, but i am doing stretches and taking Motrin for it. last night I tried the heating pad.

Husband is home for 4 days. We are going to my mom's Saturday and Sunday. Talk about STRESS....

I will update later tonight with Challenge minutes for today.

Progress as of today: -1.5 lbs lost so far, only 15 lbs to go!

Justine6Robert3 on 04/06/2007:
I'm with you on the hungry thing!!! I have been very hungry the last few days also. I think my period is coming or at least I hope it is because it would certainly explain the hunger!!!

Why is it stressful for you to go to your Mom's house? Do the two of you not get along so well or is it because she doesn't respect your decision to eat well?? My Mother-in-law has been really great since I've started this. She told me she went out and bought fruit and veggies with "light" veggie dip as an alternative to her regular chips and dip, nachos and cheese etc that she typically brings out for snacking after dinner!! I think that is so thoughtful and awesome of her to be so supportive of me. I'm interested to see how my husband does because he loves the nacho dip she makes and its sooooo loaded with fat!!! Ofcourse its also really tasty but I've managed to resist eating it. My Mom on the other hand doesn't put any thought into the fact that I'm trying so hard to eat well!! I find her very frustrating. It's not surprising that I grew up with such horrible eating habits, yikes!!! I was never taught to eat healthy. I remember my Mom telling me bagels and cream cheese was healthy and good for me, NOT!!!!

I hope you aren't to stressed out for Easter week-end!! You still have that crick in your neck to!! Could you have pulled something while exercising or stretching or is this something you usually get as a result of stress?

Great job on exercise, you are doing so well since joining the gym, I knew you would!!!

Have a great Easter!

hollybelle on 04/06/2007:
Ouch! I get cricks in neck, too. Very painful. Such a relief when gone. I have been able to get professional to massage it out. A real good masseuse can do it, but with the cost it is not always an option.

I was really hungry yesterday. The weather is cold again here, I wonder if there is something about it being cold that increases appetites?

Wishing you and family a wonderful Easter.

girliegirl6486 on 04/06/2007:
Thanks for the comment, I have been thinking about taking on a smaller role but I can't stand the people who work there anymore. There may be other opportunities available to me still in journalism; one with a video/advertising group who is interested in working with me. They're only 15 minutes from me. I might take a job with them instead. We'll see...right now I'm still too angry to think straight.

Donkey - Wednesday Apr 04, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 140.0

APRIL CHALLENGE MINUTES: 65 elliptical + 35 weight training = 95 minutes. (I had to cut my gym workout short because I was so busy. Also, I do not count the 2 5 minute walks I take with my daughter every day to the bus stop. Just an FYI.)

Even with the cancellation of one of my appointments today (helping out with my Daughter's 1st grade class), I was still in a time crunch today. Last year, I distinctly remember becoming very busy in May. Well, this year it has started in April. I think this is because the teachers here in our new school district start pumping up the homework to prepare for the expectations and demand of the next grade, next year.

I seem to have developed a crick in my neck which I believe is due to stress. However, this did not stop me from doing 60 minutes on the elliptical crosstrainer at resistance level 12 this morning. Oh my but how I wanted to quit so many times. Or turn down the resistance so it wouldn't be so hard. But I didn't.

And we managed to finish my Son's science project on time. YAY!

Progress as of today: -1.5 lbs lost so far, only 15 lbs to go!

Justine6Robert3 on 04/04/2007:
Wow, level 12 for 60 minutes, that's great!! Good for you for not giving in to the urge to stop!! Great work-out!

Glad to here you finished your son's science project on time, at least you have one less thing to be stressed out about!

They really do expect an awful lot out of kids in school these days. I don't remember feeling stressed out about school until at least grade 7 or 8. My daughter would be very stressed out by school in grade 1 if she didn't have such a wonderful teacher (thank goodness!!) I hope she gets as lucky next year!!

I hope your neck is feeling better and your day is less hectic tomorrow!

Justine6Robert3 on 04/04/2007:
By the way, thank-you for your nice comments on my diaries. Unfortunetly, I'm not always able to walk away and put on a happy face either. I try really hard but sometimes its hard not to give into the anger in the heat of the moment. We are only human and all we can do is try our best with the best of intentions, right?! I sometimes loose my cool infront of my children also (I think most of us do from time to time) and I also end up feeling horrible and guilty and then I just tell myself to try harder the next time it happens for the sake of my children! Take care Donkey, I hope your stress levels improve soon!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/04/2007:
you're doing great...nice amounts of exercise...makes me feel like i'm a bit lazy!

WorkingIt2 on 04/05/2007:
Great job on the exercise, as always. Congrats on finishing the project!

greengirl on 04/05/2007:
WOW you are really going for it with the exercise. Well done :0)

amanda8419 on 04/05/2007:
your only 'supposed' to take adipex for 90 days per calander year, or so they say, im sure other ppl manage to get it when ever they want. i just need something to kick start my weight loss i think cause nothing else works. maybe my body needs some encouragment to let go of the weight lol who knows. i have a coworker who takes it every couple years or so if she needs it, loses about 30 lbs a month and thats that so i guess we'll just see what happens. i took my first pill and i was able to eat a regular amount, instead of overeating like usual. its kinda nice not to feel like im starving when i know im really not. im going to keep a mood diary though so i can monitor what it does to my mood cause i know this is an addictive drug and can change some peoples attitudes. im gonna try to keep posting though on how i do and cross my fingers that it works for me. (did any of that make sense lol im kinda out of my mind today its been a long day )

Donkey - Tuesday Apr 03, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 140.0

APRIL CHALLENGE TOTAL: 65 min crosstrainer, 25 minutes treadmill, 20 weight training = 100 minutes

EVENING UPDATE: Will someone please tell me how I can have 2 slices of Chicago style deep dish pan pizza and ONLY be "satisfied" and not "stuffed"???? This is what I am talking about. WHY didn't I stop after one piece????? Gosh, I drive myself nuts. I am impossible.

Exercise sure did work wonders for me today. I felt so much better after the gym today. I really pushed it on the resistance level on the elliptical crosstrainer. I did intervals of resistance 8 and 12. That 12 really kicked my butt, that's for sure. I'm going to look into doing at least 1 workout a week at a higher resistance straight through.

I received good news for my son today too. The social worker at school emailed me to say that she thought it sounded like Spring Break went well for him. THEN, I made a lot of progress with getting some assessment testing done for my son, to determine what some of his problem areas would be. Fortunately, we will not have to wait very long for this to happen. It is not uncommon to wait 3 months for this kind of testing, but they should be able to see him in early May. I just want to know how to help him get along in the world, you know?

Tonight is another busy night. The kids have martial arts and then after a quick dinner, my son has to finish up on his model for his science project. I guess I will help with the posters tomorrow. In addition to this project, though, he has his normal homework to do too. Oh my goodness, so much for a 9yr old boy to handle! (((Much less his mother....)))

Progress as of today: -1.5 lbs lost so far, only 15 lbs to go!

girliegirl6486 on 04/03/2007:
LOL, I don't drink SF shakes normally - there was one left in my fridge from like October so I had it. I wanted just a little bit of food so I had a piece of whole grain toast with a little bit of peanut butter. So the bread mixed with shake equals GROSS.

greengirl on 04/03/2007:
I think that too much is expected of children these days and schools just put more pressure on them. Thats what it is like in the UK. All schools are interested in is getting good results so they are high in the education 'league tables' and heaven help any kids who make it difficult for the school!!!

I dont even notice being on my feet all day anymore, I have done it for so long!! I was always doing a lot of walking as I dont drive, but the treadmill has upped my totals!!! You cant be so far behind with all the exercise you have been doing :)

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/03/2007:
its so interesting how kids on the east coast don't have school but your's do! ha!

WorkingIt2 on 04/03/2007:
busy busy busy! Congrats on getting your exercise in!

hollybelle on 04/04/2007:
Good news on the 110 min of exercise and the testing for your son. YEA!! I can't believe you did level 12 resistence on the ET! I do 7 and it works me good. I like to kind of have not much challenge - it makes me feel powerful LOL! How long did you do it on 12? You have made me want to go home and try a higher level today! For a few minutes, at least.

Donkey - Monday Apr 02, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 140.0

FINAL APRIL CHALLENGE TALLY FOR TODAY: 170 minutes. Softball rocks!

I did weigh in this morning and there was no change on the scale. So this tells me that my "extra eating" is allowing me to maintain. If I cut out the extra eating, I should be losing weight. There it is, right there in front of me.

I am a ball of stress this morning. Husband is back at work (thank God!) and the kids are back in school. My son brings me a pile of papers that I should have seen 2 Fridays ago. It says his big science project is due on Thursday, April 5th. He had written on his worksheet April 15th, so we though he had all the time in the world to complete it. Now it has to be a rush job and done by Thursday. All of this after Husband had a week off on vacation.

And this wouldn't be so bad, except that Husband needs to finish painting the kids' rooms this week before we leave for Grandma's over Easter weekend. So now, instead of painting, he will be working on the science project instead.

My Husband is the world's biggest procrastinator (a symptom of his bigger problem of being chronically passive-aggressive) and instead of getting right into his projects, he waits until Friday to get started.

Then, because he's so out of shape, all I have to hear about is "Oh my back, oh I'm so tired, oh I ache." Well, DEAR, maybe your back hurts so much because you're carrying 40 extra pounds on your gut. I mean, I know what it felt like when I was 9 months pregnant with a 10lb+ baby, so I know what it feels like to have a gut. But he denies it, says I don't know what I"m talking about, blah blah blah.

How I deal with stress is a huge obstacle for me in this weight loss journey. You wonder why I eat that "extra food". Well, this is why. These people just drive me nuts!

And now I have to mentally prepare for Easter weekend at my mother's. How I *dread* going, especially coming off of all this crap with my husband and son. All that food, all this stress. Great, just great.

AFTERNOON EDIT: I felt so much better after I went to the gym. I'm going to track my exercise time now, and then I will update it after I am done with my Daughter's softball practice (assuming it won't rain on us). So far I've had 65 minutes on the elliptical, 25 min on the stair stepper, 20 minutes weight training and 30 minute bike ride outside.

APRIL CHALLENGE SUBTOTAL: 110 minutes. (Will hopefully add 60-90 minutes tonight with softball)

Progress as of today: -1.5 lbs lost so far, only 15 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/02/2007:
well, that's great that your extra eating didn't cause a gain!!! how awesome is that! now, there's no backsliding and just moving ahead! thank you for all your advice...i will not say a word to her about how i did apply, she doesn't need to know. I'll reconcile with myself!

borntocry on 04/02/2007:
Gosh, your husband sounds a lot like mine. He's always offering to do stuff for me but then never actually gets around to it, unless I resort to nagging and then I feel like the evil nagging shrew!

Anyway, you know how not to deal with the stress, don't you? That's a good Donkey!

Thanks for your comment, by the way! You always give me such an ego boost!

jon'smom on 04/02/2007:
Great job on the exercise. I can relate about your family situation. Have a great day!

Soon2BThin on 04/02/2007:
I've never heard anyone say they went to the gym and now they feel worse, lol! Exercise is great for picking us up. And you're doing so much!! Keep up the good work!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/02/2007:
wow, what an awesome number of minutes! i sure didn't exercise that much!

WorkingIt2 on 04/03/2007:
congrats on the exercise! Have a great day!

greengirl on 04/03/2007:
The problem with men is, they are not like women!!!! My husband can be just like that at times. Why do they always put things off??? My husband once ended up painting my staircase on Christmas Eve!!!!! Try not to let him stress you out. Your exercise will cheer you up :0)

Justine6Robert3 on 04/03/2007:
Sorry your having a bad time of it!!! It can be so stressful with the frustrating hubby and the constant worries about our children. I also allowed myself to do some "comfort eating" last night. I was so upset after getting into a bit of a fight with my hubby that I also ate late last night. I wasn't even hungry but I still ate!! At least it wasn't chips though for some reason I wanted cereal, strange!! I guess it could have been worse.

I'm so glad that your getting to the gym and using the exercise to vent some of that frustration and stress!! Great job!

hollybelle on 04/03/2007:
Men are babies for the most part. I know what you mean about the stress obstacle, however. Sometimes I hae been successful in overcoming it by telling myself that stress is going to be there - no one can escape it and at times there is going to be a lot and over-eating during those times will just add to it. I tell myself that there is a lot of stressful things I cannot control, but as far as what I eat adding to my stress or NOT adding to my stress is my choice and I get so few choices I need to make the right one. This type of self- dialog helps most of the time. See what you can reason out with yourself. It may not be the same line as I use on myself, but you may come up with something that is meaningful to you. Good luck.

Donkey - Sunday Apr 01, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 140.0

Oh my goodness, has it really be 4 days since I've added an entry? Egads!

APRIL CHALLENGE: 90 minutes of painting. (Explanation below)

Well, I wish I had better news to report. While I stayed within calorie range over the weekend, I still feel that I could have done better. I don't understand it. I detest that feeling of being full, but I also can't tolerate the empty feeling that comes with hunger. And it seems for me that there is no in-between. I just can't seem to get to that happy place in between, where I am content but not too much either way.

I had fully intended to go to the gym today. I even checked the TV schedule on the TVs that are by the crosstrainers, so that I would have a decent show to watch while working out. However, my plans went out the window when I realized that Palm Sunday services went WAY too long. Damn! Then I had lunch and I must have eaten too much because my stomach felt soooo heavy.

So rather than go workout, I decided to help my husband with painting of my children's rooms (not a fun job painting over those stupid pictures the previous owner painted all over her kids' walls -- using bold colors, thick paint). But it wasn't quite the workout I had been hoping for.

I do know that Monday will be a better day, with Husband back at work and the kids at school. I plan on making tomorrow My Day at the Gym! And I'm sure after the weigh-in tomorrow morning, I will be very motivated to burn off some calories...

Progress as of today: -1.5 lbs lost so far, only 15 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/01/2007:
you know, I have that same issue as you! I am never good at getting inbetween the feeling of satisfaction, between hunger and starving! Of course, up until I turned 17, it was never a problem!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 04/01/2007:
oh, thank you for the advice to just tell her that i applied for that job to get it off my own chest...but, i feel like i've waited too long...that she wouldn't believe that i'd kept it to myself since the summer...i don't talk to her all the time, but i could have told her in the summer or a couple days ago...but, if i continue feeling this way, i might.

Donkey - Thursday Mar 29, 2007
(Portion control & Exercise)
Weight: 140.0

Ok, I know this is today's entry, but this will be mostly about last night.

I was doing really well until I came home from the parents' meeting with my daughter's softball team. First thing my Husband starts yelling at me because the computer I use (a laptop) is "all messed up". Well, HE"S the Computer Guy. I don't do anything on the computer that I don't either understand or can manage myself. So he's accusing me of deleting programs and blah blah blah. Why, I would NEVER do ANYTHING like that.

3 hours later, he finally gets the laptop started up again (thank goodness! because I would be lost without you all!), and everything's updated. And here's where it gets ugly --- I made myself TWO big bowls of popcorn. And I ate it ALL!

Now in defense of myself, yes, I was hungry, even though according to my calorie tracker, I had sufficient calories previous to the popcorn attack (around 1700). And at least it was air-popped, plain, so no oil or fat. But TWO huge bowls of popcorn???

Well, I guess if I gotta have a binge, that's probably the healthiest way to do it (if there is such a thing). But geez! Where's my self-control???

I don't know, what do you all think? Am I being too hard on myself?

Progress as of today: -1.5 lbs lost so far, only 15 lbs to go!

greengirl on 03/29/2007:
I dont know if you are being too hard on yourself or not but I can totally relate to what you did. Out of all the people in the world it is my husband who has the ability to wind me up to that extent. It's not usually the computer that is the bone of contention with us, but the cable tv. He sits with the remote flicking through channels and teletext for hours and when stuff goes wrong (ie he accidentally moves channels up or down the viewing order or something) it is always my fault, or anyone elses fault except his. I always end up being stressed, and wanting to eat. Self control sometimes flies out the window!!! Look at it this way, popcorn iss a lot better than some other stuff!!!!

girliegirl6486 on 03/29/2007:
As far as binges go, I think you're being a little too hard on yourself because like you said, it was a healthy binge.

biscottibody59 on 03/29/2007:
I'd call 2 huge bowls of popcorn a good source of fiber for the day;-) As far as being too hard on yourself, only you know that!

borntocry on 03/29/2007:
Too hard on yourself. Two bowls of popcorn is nothing! And you say you were truly hungry, too. You made a pretty healthy choice, in my opinion.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 03/30/2007:
at least the popcorn has fiber. however, popcorn doesn't fill me. i need more of a dense food...like bran and milk or yogurts.

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