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Donkey - Thursday Apr 15, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

I told my boss that when he leaves the office for appointments or marketing events, my files start to explode the moment he shuts the front door.  Yesterday was no exception.  He and New Guy went to a marketing event, and sure enough, I had 4 angry files waiting for him on his chair when he came back.  And I *KNOW* he didn't want to do any more work.  He looked tired.  He had just had a very positive marketing experience and just wanted to relax and bask in that, but the files just don't wait.  

Then, Associate Attorney got mad at Mistakes Girl for making a BIG mistake.  Mistakes Girl reviewed the mistake with the Boss, and while the Boss felt she was right, he surrendered and said, Well, let's see what the title company has to say.  WHAT?????  YOU'RE the attorney - the lady at the title company didn't even graduate from college!  And YOU can't make this call? 

So it will be interesting to see how that plays out.  Associate Attorney told me twice that he's 100% sure he's right, but then, he tends to be egotistical like that.  I'm pretty sure he's right too, but none of this is my problem.  I'm just an interested bystander, LOL!

Sorry to focus so much on my Work Life.  Queen Bee is working from home in the morning, but said she'd come in for 3 hours in the afternoon to work in the office.  OK.


 

I did OK with food, but I've been chipping away at the leftover birthday cake every night this week, so far.  I'm going to try hard to refrain tonight.

Last night, I could have gone to the gym to do cardio.  I *should* have gone to the gym to do cardio.  But instead, I stuck to my old habit of riding my bike at home.  I didn't ride as long as usual, and came upstairs to work on my latest puzzle ("Cat in the Library").  This is a much more difficult puzzle, but this time, I'm OK with doing it by myself.  It gets done, when it gets done.  The process (of doing the puzzle) is the part that helps me relax and let go from the worries of the day.


 

As I mentioned yesterday, I tried waking up early today.  I had time to do some lower body weights.  My plan is to do more leg exercises tonight, after a short bike ride, so it will be a bonus leg day for me today.

I'm thinking about taking the last week of April "off" from weights and then start a new weight training routine in May, that would be more of a daily thing.  We'll see.

You know, you can take a fitness class or hire a personal trainer, but I think what I really need (want?) is a nutritional coach. 

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 04/15/2021:
Cake is so enticing.......it's always saying psssst....come here!


Jacky82020 on 04/15/2021:
Why do they tolerate Mistake Girl? You don’t have a union, do you? When I taught at a public school they kept the worse ppl & only fired those who committed criminals acts such as molesting students and stealing computers & fake overtime to their faves, etc.

Donkey on 04/16/2021:
No union - we are a small company of 7 employees? My boss is a capitalist.



Donkey - Wednesday Apr 14, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

Yesterday was actually not too bad of a day, and that's pretty good.  Queen Bee did not work yesterday.  She said she would be working from home, on her own stuff.  I think we could have used her help yesterday, but it all fell on Mistakes Girl, and she's so mellow and easy-going that it worked out fine for me.  The only extra work I did was to help out Mistakes Girl by opening up some contracts. I had time to do it anyway, so that's fine by me.

Also, I'm learning that Queen Bee - if she comes in to work - has to leave at 4pm, because her 14 yr old son has baseball.  Again, fine by me.

The Boss left at 1:40pm for a 2pm doctor's appointment and never came back.  New Guy left around 4pm - I didn't even see him leave.  Mistakes Girl left at 4:44p.  I would have left at 4:30pm, but I was waiting for Associate Attorney to write a letter, which he gave to me at 4:49p.  After I sent it out, the door to his office (with Nice Lady) was shut, so I went home; it was 4:59pm.

Dinner had a lot of carbs, penne with red sauce and meatballs.  Then I had a small slice of birthday cake.  Husband poured me a glass of wine, which I wouldn't have had otherwise.  I ended up finishing it up as I was getting ready for bed.  Lights out at 9:30pm.

Oh, and I had an awesome upper body weight training episode at home last night, with dumbbells and my barbell.  I realized that on the days that I have at-home weight training, I can do these in the morning if I shorten my bike ride (in the morning).  Then I can do a longer bike ride in the evenings.  Not sure why this hadn't occurred to me before.  This only works if I wake up early enough on those weight-training days.  I might try this on Thursday, for leg day. 

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 04/15/2021:
wrote you back on yesterday's entry too :)

so glad yesterday went well for you, thankful.

oh yeah, the story of being a parent with all those obligations, def gets a person leniency almost always to go home on time! ha! not us, lol....

yum dinner and wine. i have learned to not love pasta because it's so "manufactured," prob once in awhile i like it, but, because i've refrained from it so long, i do not have it often anymore or even really crave it mostly never ever..

glad you did great on your upper body, that's me tonight. yes, there's always room for modification of your workout routine to see what's best for you, always nice to continue making changes. I am sure this is in my future too, always changing it up a bit.



Donkey - Tuesday Apr 13, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

I was glad that I left work early yesterday, but I'm sure I'll regret it this morning, when I sit down to see how many emails are waiting for me...  Oh well, just going to take it one at a time.  I will use this as a mental exercise in moderation.   No need to panic, it will all get done by Friday.

I think Daughter had a nice birthday.  The dinner with the Boyfriend was odd.  He's a nice guy.  He runs the shopper department at Walmart, so if I were to change jobs, he'd be my boss.  Yeah.... WEIRD. 

Afterwards, my daughter had other friends come over, and they were up VERY LATE.  I kept waking up to strange noises, even with a loud fan AND a sleep sound machine going.  I woke up at 1:18am - full of energy, ready to go - and then never really fell back into quality sleep.  I did a lot of dreaming, thinking I was awake, but not really.  So I'm exhausted.  I bet my Fitbit tells me I got a *really* good sleep score.  My Fitbit doesn't know me.  I'm so tired.

So, I'm tired and anxious with the workload, and going to work with Queen Bee.  She wasn't too bad yesterday.  She's at the way other end of the office, doing Male Co-Worker's job, so she's not affecting me that much.... or rather, as much as she might if she was doing Mistakes Girl's job.

I ate way too much cake last night, which is one reason why I didn't sleep well.  My metabolism was on fire trying to burn off the extra calories.  Also, my tummy was upset, and I just don't feel my best all the way around.  I would love a salad for lunch today. 

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 04/13/2021:
What is the Walmart shopper dept? The guys who do the pickup? We still use that service because the Walmart Capital One card only kicks back 5% on pickup, not in the store. We use a 3% rewards card from Huntington Bank for inside the store.

I get weird dreams like that too! Occasionally disturbing.

Hope work goes ok for you today, HUGS

Donkey on 04/14/2021:
You may recall that I've written about writing my law firm job and working at Walmart as a shopper, fulfilling the online grocery orders to be picked up at the store. That's what I'm talking about here. The boyfriend is the manager of the online grocery fulfillment department.


Jacky82020 on 04/14/2021:
Yep, I do remember now. Would it represent a huge pay cut? Think the Walmarts around here start at $15 hour. No idea about raises etc.

Donkey on 04/15/2021:
It would be a pay cut initially, but I'd have full benefits if I worked full-time.


horn_of_plenty on 04/15/2021:
i agree with your first few sentences here. enjoy the time out of work, when you leave early. you do you. you can refocus tomorrow at work on these things. and yes, like you said in an earlier entry, take the time to breathe. i have been at work since 7:30am and i'm still refocusing after a later evening at work yesterday. my brain still needs to refocus on all that happened in the last 1.5hours of work yesterday...you know how it goes.

Donkey on 04/15/2021:
Oh I've had so many days of working long overtime hours. A few summers ago, I actually went home at 6pm, ate dinner, took a shower, and went back into the office and worked until 10pm. THAT is crazy.

I'm never doing that again. Seriously, it's 5:30pm at the latest if possible.


horn_of_plenty on 04/15/2021:
sorry it was a crazy night, try to get a couple decent nights of sleep following it...that's my plan too, until the weekend when i can really sleep a bit more too..

Donkey on 04/15/2021:
Hopefully you'll be able to catch up. I wish I didn't need much sleep.



Donkey - Monday Apr 12, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

A new work week - and we'll see how it goes with Queen Bee!  I have to keep reminding myself that I'm coming home early today.  And I have to be sure that I do leave work when I say I'm going to leave.  I tend to try to get more things done, and before you know it, an hour has gone by.

Had a good workout at the gym yesterday.  Did upper body weights.  Someone was messing with the TV's though, so that we could all watch the Masters golf tournament -- which I was intentionally boycotting watching - and so I ended up watching some kind of documentary from the Brigham Young University TV channel about how God led the people featured on the show to reunite with long-lost family members.  Nope.  Not going there.  No thank you.

Food continues to be a struggle.  I know I do too much cardio. I would be better served doing a little less cardio --- I mean, I really do TOO MUCH of it -- so that I can eat less, and then more weight training.  Or rather, weight training more often. 

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 04/12/2021:
Yeah, totally stick with the goal to leave on time, it will put your mind at peace! so many times i had a goal to leave and didn't...i felt awful that i didn't leave bc it's one of the special times when you are entitled! take it!

lol sorry you didn't have anything you prefer on tv at the gym! i totally understand, when i used to go to one gym, before i forced myself to get into the habit of wearing headphones, i'd ask them to change the radio station! i was in my late 20's at this point. haha. even early 30's i did it...then i switched to headphones LOL.

i get you with the food. when i really overdo cardio, it becomes hard to control the ccalories as well, but also, eating / habits are a mental thing and it's hard to break habits. remember how far you came. you don't need to follow those habits of now going up in weight, you've lost 4lbs at least....

i will say tho, that part of my weight loss may be to changes in doseage of the anxiety meds. the higher the dose, the easier it becomes for me to control my weight, or, it could ALSO be that i've learned more about how to control my eating. but, i'd give the meds a little thanks either way.

Donkey on 04/13/2021:
I don't think I realized you were still taking meds for anxiety. With some people, they do help with weight-loss. I've never had that side-effect with the few anti-anxiety meds I've been on. I love to eat - and I love to eat a LOT.



Donkey - Sunday Apr 11, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

Yesterday kind of dissolved into a diet-disaster, although, mentally, it was a good day for me.

I was disappointed in the Zoom tour.  It was not a tour of the museum, it was a powerpoint webinar about African Americans in aviation.  So my expectations were not met -- which is OK.  I learned another lesson about how to set my expectations.  AND it was an interesting presentation, once I realized what it was going to be.  I felt that the presenter was not fully prepared in her presentation, and that it was a more "free style" discussion of her chosen topic.  Also, I just felt an overwhelming sadness, thinking about the Chauvin trial, Black Lives Matter --- IDK.  Let's just say that this hour was not what I thought it was going to be.  This bothered me for most of the remainder of the day.  In fact, I'm still kind of bothered by this.

I'm looking forward to next week's tour of the Garfield Park Conservatory.  I do much better with plants.


 

After the Zoom tour was done, Husband said that our Son would be calling soon.  So that meant I would not be able to go to the gym.  His family calls usually take at least an hour - and I'm so glad that he does call.  It's so good to hear from him.  I have to say this to you, friends -- my son is kind of stressing me out with his plans for his vacation leave this summer.  He wants us to take a week to go back out to Montana.  I don't know if I can do that.  He's talking about August, and that's right before Mistakes Girl has her baby.  And it's also our busiest time in the office.  Finally all that I can think about is getting through this next week with Queen Bee -- I can't be thinking about August.

So the call kind of stressed me out.


 

I decided then, after the call, that I would go to the gym after dinner, which would have worked well, because we all wanted an early dinner.  Fine, except that after dinner, I did not want to go to the gym. Nobody wanted to go with me.  It was getting dark.  My car was all cozy in the garage.  And I had laundry to fold and a new episode of my British mystery TV show ("Death in Paradise").

  • So I rode my bike downstairs until the show started (GOOD). 
  • I got my laundry folded and put away (GOOD). 
  • I watched the TV show and I'm so disappointed where the storyline and casting are going that I will not be watching this show any more (NOT GOOD - but GOOD in a way, because now I will have freedom from this commitment to the show). 
  • Somewhere in all of this, I decided that it would be a good idea to go get the back of tortilla chips to eat while I watch TV (NOT GOOD). 
  • I ate way too many, and my tummy let me know how upset it was with me (NOT GOOD).

 

I have decided now to start this week anew.  No more of this indulgent eating, except for tomorrow, when we'll have cake to celebrate Daughter's birthday.

Also, the next time I feel the urgent, uncontrollable need to break the 11th Commandment at work, I must do these things:

  • Brush my teeth - at work, yes, I can do that.
  • Go out to my car and sit for 1 minute and come back.
  • Log in to DD here and let you all know that I'm going to eat.

Let's see if this can help.


To Do Today:

  • Mop floor on main level
  • Cat laundry
  • Gym - upper body weights
  • Finish up puzzle, perhaps start new puzzle
  • Pay bills & deposit checks
  • Wrap gifts for daughter's b-day tomorrow

 

SO HAPPY I AM LEAVING WORK EARLY TOMORROW

 

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 04/11/2021:
All I know about Blacks in aviation comes from movies and doc films on the Red Tails. Saw an actual plane at the local airport, there for a show. Sorry the presentation was a disappointment.

Hope you can schedule the family vacation when it’s good for everyone.

Unfamiliar with that British series. Watching the crime documentary miniseries on the murder of Michael Jordan’s father. Didn’t know anything about it. Ok, but going way off topic & slowing down.

Donkey on 04/12/2021:
I didn't even know that much about Blacks in aviation. :-(

IDK - doing some real soul searching as to why this disappointment bothered me so much, other than taking up my time.


Horn_of_plenty on 04/11/2021:
I am, as usual, late to comment...i haven't forgotten and will catch up lastest tomorrow on your entries. i want to thank you for your support during the past week where it turned into a struggle for me - but i do feel a bit better today. so thank you.


Horn_of_plenty on 04/11/2021:
lol, i re-read friday's entry below which i did sorta read on Friday and it's funny that since he's new, the new attorney doesn't realize what's allowed / not allowed and perhaps in future you can help him out? although i see why you would just wait for him to ask boss or since you are the "paralegal" and not the attorney, you are careful to not overstep...go you!...that's someting i'd prob screw up if i were in your place...nice job not overstepping, in my mind...

Donkey on 04/12/2021:
I found that I was getting into heated discussions with clients when I tried to give advice that the attorney would give -- even if it ended up being the very same thing that he said. So now, I defer a LOT more often to the attorney.


Horn_of_plenty on 04/11/2021:
see my below comment to your Saturday entry :)

I wanted to mention, if you didn't look yet, at your bar graph weight chart. you are doing so well, lowest weight in months. you've almost lost 5 lbs. so, the work you are doing has actually gotten you success! so now is not the time to give up!

LOL. well, that IS unfortunate that the webinar was nothing you had planned it to be. I can TOTALLY understand your disappointment and it lasting as you had set aside your time for something you planned for and they semi-fell through. at least you learned something, but i totally understand! i'd def be feeling the same way.

Donkey on 04/12/2021:
Thank you for pointing out my graph -- I hadn't really looked at it to realize what it was saying.

Regarding the webinar - it just feels as though every hour of my time on the weekends is precious, and so this seemed like "wasted time". Thank you for understanding.


Horn_of_plenty on 04/11/2021:
maybe let your son know a little that because of work and someone having a baby, you will have to wait to think more clearly about the summer and plans. maybe next time, take a few tortilla chips and with a cup of tea, other type of drink, seltzer....so that you CAN sit down, enjoy a serving or so of chips, watch your show, and not overeat.

i'm glad you will enjoy cake tomorrow for your daughter's bday. remember there's no concrete bad/good and it's the serving size that really counts.

rooting for you!

Donkey on 04/12/2021:
Choices and portion control --- that's really what it comes down to, and that is what I'm really struggling with right now.



Donkey - Saturday Apr 10, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

Forgive me, DD-ers, for I have sinned.  Yesterday, I broke the 11th Commandment ("Thou shall not eat the Boss' food at work").  I caved and had a very heavy chocolate chip scone.  I just couldn't cope with the work stress AND food stress yesterday.  I did pretty good the rest of the week, but yesterday, I just broke down.  

Not a commandment, but then I also indulged in some cookie desserts after dinner last night.  I completely knew that I was eating because I was tired/exhausted - both physically and mentally - but that didn't stop me from having a few extra cookies.

I was ready for a very high weigh-in today, but much to my surprise, the scale had not moved.  OK, I'll take that. Is that a sign that I've been forgiven?  Well, one thing for sure, I had a very good morning bike ride on my recumbent bike this morning.  Lots of energy!

 


It's cool, cloudy, and rainy today and I LOVE IT.  This is why I know, in my heart, that I could never be completely happy if I moved to Vegas to be closer (physically) to my mother.  I need the cooler weather, the wet weather.  I don't think I could be happy in a desert.  Anyway...

So while the weather means that the gym will be busier, because all those "outdoor" people will come inside to workout, that's OK.  In fact, I'm thinking about going tonight, when it's emptier, even if this pushes me out of my routine and comfort zone.  I'll see if Daughter and/or Husband wants to go with me.  But they don't have to - I'll be happy just going alone too.

I have a virtual, Zoom tour of the DuSable museum this afternoon 1pm-2pm.  I'm really looking forward to that.  Afterwards, if I want to go to the gym then, that's OK, I'll do that.  However, I have a bit of deep cleaning to do today (and tomorrow?) in order to prepare for guests on Monday night, that will come over to celebrate my Daughter's birthday.  And I'm OK with doing the cleaning - the physical work is welcomed until I get tired, and then I can take a break.

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

KathyBlue on 04/10/2021:
Don't worry about one single occasion of indulgence, the scale didn't move because that was only a minor mishap, something that helped you relax a bit from a tough storm of negative feelings. It's very important you forgive yourself, and accept that emotional eating happens from time to time, just keep telling yourself that it's an EXCEPTION and not a HABIT. I wonder if there would be a better stress relief than food, immediately available. Like, give some attention to your dog, take him for a walk, if you have one. Or go for a walk with some motivational music blasting in your ears. Walk or drive... whatever makes you relaxed. Or the shower itself! Buy some nicely smelling bath products and pamper yourself with that. That museum tour sounds intriguing, let us know about it later! :)

Donkey on 04/11/2021:
I will write more about this today, but yeah, the need for some kind of dessert is definitely sabotaging my efforts.

I work at the office, so I don't have stress-decompressing tools available to me other than walking away from my computer, which then means I'll be farther behind in work.

I'll write more about all of this today - thank you for inspiring my diary entry for today! :-)


Horn_of_plenty on 04/11/2021:
if i had to deal with the boss bringing in food, i would def be eating it. as you can see, my breakfasts lately are VERY sweet. I would just totally start eating the food, but not large amounts and maybe in combo with my own...i see no reason you can't eat the bosses food - because you DO LIKE SWEETS. it's just the size that you'll have to work on. and eat with your coffee so it fills you up...personally, to me i'd take it as food / money savings...just as i drink the office coffees...

i totally relate to the feeling of eating bc i am tired / exhausted. as of recently, when i really feel totally wiped, i will consider eating, but then skipping exercise so that i can just go to bed after eating, and not need to eat more during/after my workout. i'm just writing this saying i can relate. you've known me long enough to know i've dealt with some crazy overeating due to stress. I think the anxiety medicine i'm on has helped...actually, i should just say i KNOW that its helped. how couldn't it!?

you have such nice things in store....the online tour sounds great and so does going to the gym either just yourself or with family.



Donkey - Friday Apr 09, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

Very short on time this morning.  The Boss left at 4:20pm yesterday and minutes later, 2 of my files closing today blew up.  The one I rescued, the other it will depend on whether or not the buyer wants to close today.  She's so picky and yet very ignorant, so we'll see.  Once again, I needed an attorney, New Guy was the only one around, and this was way over his head. "I'll have to ask the Boss."  Well, DUH!!!  I need help NOW.  **I** can ask the Boss tomorrow.  Of course I didn't say that.  I'm just frustrated with his inexperience and lack of knowledge that comes from that inexperience.  I'm also noticing a lack of self-confidence in him.

The thing is, we're promoting his services when he doesn't know what to do when it gets complicated.  Does he know what he's doing?


My lower body leg workout last night was pathetic.  Just did 2 exercises, 4 sets of 15 reps.  Could say that I didn't have it in me, but this was a motivational issue 100% and not a physical limitation.  Not exhaustion, just laziness.

I did find myself doing some deep breathing and arm stretching yesterday.  Not exactly a timeout though.  It was a little better, but the thing is to STEP AWAY from the desk, the computer, and the phone.   I think I will keep working on this.

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 04/09/2021:
Think New Guy will last? Or stick around and learn? Sounds like more work for you. Bet you’re looking forward to the weekend!

Donkey on 04/10/2021:
Frankly and honestly, I think the New Guy is the future of our firm.

Initially, the idea was that Associate Attorney would be the future and "buy out" the firm from the Boss, when the Boss was ready to retire. However, over the past 5-6 years, Associate Attorney has clearly demonstrated his LACK of ability to lead. He's a follower, not a leader - and that's fine, but not someone that you want to sell the firm to.


KathyBlue on 04/10/2021:
Oh bad day I see. Good it's weekend now, try to not think about it. Rise and shine, enjoy it the most. I also have daily struggles with incompetent people, work-wise. Lack of self-confidence leads to mistrust from others (including me) and it's one of the worst things to deal with! The question is, is he humble and self-conscious enough to accept positive criticism and guidance? Because if you anyway have to deal with him, then maybe try to guide him to reach some goals of professional improvement.

Donkey on 04/10/2021:
I think that the New Guy has the makings to be a very good attorney, and yes, I think he does appreciate constructive criticism - I'm always very clear to point out when I'm not criticizing but just commenting objectively versus criticizing.

I'm not sure I can picture myself working for only him though. That's a completely different question.


KathyBlue on 04/10/2021:
Oh so not a lost cause, that's interesting! I have some I declared "lost causes", and honestly they mark my mood more than any huge workload or work-related stress. I can handle computers and coding (I'm a programmer) but human stupidity and carelessness are beyond my comprehension and tolerance!



Donkey - Thursday Apr 08, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

Oh. My. Word.  Let me tell you, if yesterday was any indication of it's like to be short-staffed, next week is going to be VERY difficult.  Mistakes Girl left at 11am, so that she and her husband could take care of something in downtown Chicago.  This was unexpected, as she forgot to schedule her time off on the calendar, but I didn't think it'd be a big deal.  But that phone would just not stop ringing yesterday, and Mistakes Girl is the first line of defense against phone calls (i.e. receptionist).  

And I'm so frustrated with my Boss.  He keeps trying to put work off that he needs to do - as an attorney - on to others. When I corrected him on this, he told me that I needed to give him a break.  Well, you're the attorney!!!  Do your job!!!  Or don't take on these types of clients, if you can't or won't do the work!!!

Some of these aggravations are because of his personality, but recently, I've noticed a LOT of behaviors that I'm afraid are because of his age and/or his health.  This worries me, saddens me, frustrates me....  So add all this extra stress to an already stressful workplace and there you go.

Thank you for letting me vent this all out here.

 


I mentioned to Maria, in her comment to me yesterday, that I need to start taking timeouts at work and just focus on breathing and calming down.  I think this would help me greatly.

I think I need to start doing mini yoga sessions on a regular basis.  There are lots of 15 minute yoga videos on YouTube.  Something like that.

I just need to grasp at anything that will bring down my stress levels without costing me a million calories!!!


 

Yesterday, I realized I was out of high-fiber wraps, so I couldn't have my peanut butter wrap for breakfast.  Had oatmeal instead, and believe it or not, it actually held me quite well.  I'm wondering if I should go back to that (175 calories) rather than my wraps (260 calories).  But then I realized that Husband bought me more wraps and these are smaller in size, so now the peanut butter wraps will be 235 calories.  Hmm....  Something to think about changing up, I think.

I'm sorry, I'm kind of all over the place with today's entry, with my thoughts and such, and now I'm out of time so I have to end it here, now....  Except to say that tonight is lower body weight training and I'm REALLY looking forward to THAT!!!

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

Maria7 on 04/08/2021:
Wow, you do persevere with the work stress. I hope you do take some time out for yourself. Walk around and look at the beauty of nature that God created. Enjoy the springtime. Listen to the birds sing.


innerpeace on 04/08/2021:
YES, GIRL...take your breaks!!


legcramps on 04/08/2021:
Even a short walk would help; I did that yesterday afternoon as normally I do not take breaks except for a half hour lunch break. Yesterday I needed a break, so went for a 15 minute walk. It was nice, and I came back to my desk feeling a lot better.


Jacky82020 on 04/08/2021:
What kinda high fiber wraps do you prefer?

Sounds like your job can be highly stressful. HUGS

Donkey on 04/09/2021:
A prefer a BIGGER wrap, not the small ones. LOL, the ones I eat are from Mission. 3 net carbs on the larger ones. Not sure what these little guys have.


Horn_of_plenty on 04/08/2021:
i used to not always be able to relate to your type of work stress...but with a new job and having to work with a group of people sort of like you do, i get it. i finally SEE your stress a little more and having work with a variety of personalities. i used to just have to work with 1-2 people..

your boss is EXACTLY like my boss. my boss as well puts off priorities and they become very late! ha! then again, i do not know exactly what type of work my boss does, as i do what could have been his work...believe it or not, i do not exactly know what work my boss does! i couldn't explain it in depth! i know he is involved in writing contracts, but, let me tell you - there's a LOT i do not know!


Horn_of_plenty on 04/08/2021:
change it up donk...some days wraps, some oatmeal....you do you....but there's NO RULES! :) it's your rules, you be you! <3



Donkey - Wednesday Apr 07, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

Yesterday was a mixed bag, but ended on a good note, and that's what counts, right?

Work is still stressful, and I think that a lot of this stress is just from it being the "busy season".  It just seems as though each file has a sour client, a title problem, an impossible deadline, etc.  At least I know it's not just me feeling this stress.

Came home and had somewhat of a contenuous dinner - let's just say a loud dinner conversation over something really stupid.  This upset my daughter and she left to go back to work in a foul mood.  I texted her later asking her not to be mad at her dad (Mr. Donkey), because it's just negative energy that goes to no good.  I was over it, and determined to have a good evening, so she didn't need to be upset for me.  IDK if it worked.

I had a GREAT upper body weight training session last night at home.  A perfect ending to a not-so-great day.  


Working on stress levels today, trying to keep it positive.  My mantra:  STAY COOL.

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

Maria7 on 04/07/2021:
We are living during extra stressful times. I helps to be more considerate than usual to others. A lot of people walking around these days with a 'short fuse'. Why not enjoy the day and thank the Lord for it, including all His blessings? I know. Trying times. But we can do our best to be kinder, and more sympathetic. Everybody, including yours truly. HUGS!!!

Donkey on 04/08/2021:
Taking those walks is my way of reconnecting with my blessings. That's why I think taking "breathing breaks" (see below), where I just breathe, chill, pray, meditate, would really help.

This is a habit I want to establish. I just keep forgetting! It's too easy to get caught up in all the distractions at work. Constant interruptions.


bearcountrygg on 04/07/2021:
Yes...lots of frustrated uptight people out there......Take time to breathe......

Donkey on 04/08/2021:
I've definitely got to take some timeouts to breathe. I get so caught up in the pace of work that I forget.

Breathing might be my key to get through this tough patch.



Donkey - Tuesday Apr 06, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

I almost logged in here yesterday, from work, at 10:41am, to let you know that I had already been screamed at, hung up on, barraged with phone calls...  Seriously, I felt literally, physically shocked - like someone had put my finger in an electrical outlet.  However, I made myself some camomile tea instead and just sat back for a few minutes.  This didn't quite "restore" me, but it did help put me back on an even track to proceed forward with my day.  All I could think of is that I'm so glad that my husband is no longer a 911 dispatcher, because I know that every day he worked felt like that and worse.

My anxiety was not relieved though when I:

  • Remembered that Queen Bee will be back in the office next week while Male Co-Worker is out on vacation.
  • The Boss is planning a realtor party in August (?) to welcome the New Guy.  He's Latino, so it was supposed to be a Latino themed party - tacos, margaritas, etc. - but Queen Bee is a racist, so now it's going to be country farm ho-down themed.  I HATE THESE REALTOR EVENTS.  And if I'm not vaccinated by then, ain't no way I'm going.  Why does he have these parties when we're at our busiest?

 


I felt myself dreading the time obligation of yoga class, but as soon as I hit the mat, I felt instant relaxation. 

However, I must admit that I had too much dessert last night.  This happened for 2 reasons:

  • My dinner was too light - could have used more vegetables, which I didn't realize were actually available, because Husband left them in the microwave.
  • Exhausted from all the stress of the day and using sugar to boost my energy level AND my mood.

So I will do better tonight.  Please allow me to clarify that I did not feel that this was a binge or a food fit.  Just had an extra piece of cinnamon cake (1 inch x 1 inch pieces), for about 370 calories.  

 


Weatherwise, it will be another beautiful day.  I will enjoy my lunchtime walk and all that it has to offer.

 

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 04/06/2021:
When your office has those kinds of parties...do they call the local newspaper? Possibly a free article for advertising? I don't blame you for not liking them...I wouldn't either.

Donkey on 04/07/2021:
No advertising in the paper - it's a party to recruit more real estate agents to send us contracts. Lots of small talk (which I hate) and socializing (which I'm not really good at, with people I don't know and trust).


innerpeace on 04/06/2021:
I would much rather have margaritas and tacos...

Donkey on 04/07/2021:
Right????? I think it's just Queen Bee's way of saying, "If I'm in charge of planning this party, it's going to be MY WAY."

Ok, whatever QB... (lol)


horn_of_plenty on 04/06/2021:
glad you will have some personal time next week. try not to overdo it this week, so you have energy for your personal time next week...

Donkey on 04/07/2021:
Good point!!!!! Really good point!!!!


horn_of_plenty on 04/06/2021:
wow...your husband was a 911 dispatcher! i would never have guessed! crazy stress job hearing everyone's problems but interesting job as well.

at least if you leave early a bit next week, your time with Queen B will be limited. just keep your distance, right?

and even if you are vaccinated by the party, keep your mask on.

glad you enjoyed the yoga afterall!

Donkey on 04/07/2021:
Whoa I hadn't thought about that -- less time with Queen Bee. Whoa.... Now that's a bonus I hadn't considered.


Maria7 on 04/06/2021:
Hope you are having a better day today.

Donkey on 04/07/2021:
Tuesday was still stressful but at least not as negative. And I wasn't the only one getting really stressed out -- sort of the "misery loves company" deal.

The stress is one thing, but the negativity just kills a little bit of me each time.


legcramps on 04/06/2021:
omg, I leave the vegetables in the microwave ALL THE TIME! It's so frustrating LOL.

Donkey on 04/07/2021:
LOL!!!!! I took those to lunch on Tuesday. I wasn't about to let those go to waste another day!



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