This day already seems difficult... Feeling bloated... Work has been a battlefield every day, usually with lenders or other attorneys... Holiday stress is already getting to me with all this Black Friday talk... I received a larger medical bill from when I hurt my back in summer 2017! Insurance had appealed this, I guess, and so the $600 balance that I end up owing is DUE NOW. I'm going to have to dip into savings to pay for that, because right now, my checking account has a little over $500 in it. My back is tight -- probably from the stress -- and it's supposed to snow again today. I had hoped that my son would mow the backyard today to mulch up all the fallen leaves.
It just seems to all be piling up on me at once, and it feels overwhelming.
Well, a grumpy disposition will do nothing to solve that, so I might as well be cheerful and take one task at a time. And all I can do is try to make the best food decisions for myself today. The weekend, next week's class, the holidays, all of that will wait... Right now, my focus is getting through today, as kindly and as cheerful as possible.
I'm getting a little ahead of myself, but I wanted to talk about this now, so that I can plan. Having a plan is essential to weight-loss and/or maintenance ("After-Land").
Next week, with American Thanksgiving, starts about a month (a little bit more) of holiday eating:
The year I got married, there were at least additional 2 engagement shower-parties thrown into the mix, and by the end of the year, I was so sick of eating out.
My husband has already declared that holidays should not be Whole 30 or restrictive, but I don't agree with that, especially, since this has essentially become a lifestyle change for me. My plan is to make the best choices possible, and whenever possible, have healthy or low-carb or keto side dishes. My concern is that I may just decide to "pitch it" and throw abandon to the wind. That happened a few years ago, and I gained back all the weight I had lost. Oh my no, I cannot let that happen again.
Progress as of today: 62 lbs lost so far, only -12 lbs to go!
Christmas will be the major challenge for me. We're always on the road visiting family. Road trips at Christmas always make me want to constantly snack / eat just to stave off the boredom / monotony of driving 20+ hours each way. Then when we visit various family members, they all have the best holiday food / snacks set out. Then we always have a few select restaurants that we miss the rest of the year, so try to hit each and every one during our stay.
but back to you, i do not think it's a good idea to throw abandon to the wind! no!!!!
if you eat in ways that you have practiced and that help you to feel good, why would you want to TOTALLY forget it for a long period of time.
even the holiday meals, you can try without taking seconds.
there are things we can do to make our choices less detrimental to the maintenance process.
I, for one, do not plan to gain weight back on a larger level at all this season...the struggle to getting it off is not fun...
however, even with a few indulgences and then eating our normal ways, we wouldn't gain much...so that's food for thought.
however, if you can enjoy those holiday meals and eat as you usually do all the other days, there will be no major catastrophe.
your husband's mindset, being so new to the "whole 30", is so different than yours which is a lifestyle change.
EVENING UPDATE: Today, I had just had it with the back-stabbing in my office, so I took out the mail and just kept on walking, walked around the block to clear my head. It really helped bring my mind to a joyful place, to be outside in the morning, walking.
I still feel like I am eating too much during the day. I know that part of this is because I am struggling to drink water like I did in the leaner, summer months. I can do this with more focus; but, this week, it's been easier to reach for another snack than it is to drink. PLUS, I am having some bathroom issues that need to resolve themselves soon. That could be part of what is causing discomfort.
Queen Bee will be out of the office for most of the day tomorrow, doing marketing at real estate offices. PRO: the office will be so much quieter without her around. CON: she's taking The Girl who Makes a Million Mistakes with her, so I'll be the one answering phones, which makes it harder to get my own work done. However, if I don't have much work to do, then it's OK because it will keep me busy.
Last thing tonight, I am happy Donkey tonight because The Great British Baking Show has uploaded a new season on Netflix, and I watched episode 1 with my daughter. I look forward to watching the show with her.... and fantasizing over the food, LOL.
I ended up eating a lot more than I had planned yesterday. Queen Bee made an announcement that the little fridge in our upstairs office would be cleaned out at 5pm, so I had to move my food to the large refrigerator downstairs, and making re-arrangements with what I ate. I ended up eating 2 cheese sticks and no cottage cheese. And, unrelated, I ended up eating the entire can of garbanzo beans - it was so yummy! But way too many carbs. I also ate the banana - which upon peeling, decided it was a LARGE banana, not a MEDIUM one - AND ALL of the grapes - again, way too many carbs and sugars.
So with all this extra eating, I hoped I would have more energy for my morning bike-ride, but alas, I still found myself having to push myself a little bit. The performance was there, but the motivation was a little weak. Still, got the job done.
Adjusted my evening de-stressing bike ride so that I accomplish my goals. I think a 25 minute ride does the trick, and it's just long enough to get in most any episode of Golden Girls or any other sitcom or game show.
I am hoping to schedule the closing for a couple of really troublesome files today. Also, next Tuesday, I will be home all day because I am taking an online state-required continuing education class for one of the licenses I hold. Thanks to WiFi, I plan to view this seminar and still walk on the treadmill or ride my bike or chill out in my bedroom. It's from 9am to 6pm. Can you imagine sitting the whole time??? YIKES.
Progress as of today: 62 lbs lost so far, only -12 lbs to go!
End up having continuing-ed every couple years for my job and it's always mind-numbingly boring. Used to have to sit through the real in-person class with 20-30 others. Couldn't believe some of the questions asked by some of the people. These were very basic concepts that should've been learned prior to even obtaining a license. Some of the questions they asked made me wonder how exactly they were supposedly doing their jobs at all. Thankfully now everything's transitioned to on-line and I can sit there in my jammies.....
Now it's either live webinar or self-study. If you do the webinar, like I've signed up for,there's no final exam. I did the self-study last year because it was cheaper (and because I ran out of time to attend a webinar) and I was ready to pull my hair out. An 8 hour class took me over 16 hours to complete. And then I had to take the final exam! NOT THIS YEAR!
Like you, i'm having many experiences at my office lately where i can hardly believe the words / ideas / opinions / crap coming out of coworkers' mouths...
FOR INSTANCE, there's a nice woman a work with. She's opinionated but her opinions, after you remove her tone of voice she says them in because she DOES speak with confidence so she could easily fool you to thinking what she says is a "majority" opinion...she's in the minority comparatively in politics of NYC. i'll write more later, but, let me leave it with this: She is first generation Italian born here. She's 45 - so similar to you. and grew up here her whole life. Her parents both from from Italy countryside...
Well, I made a comment about Columbus Day perhaps being a "white man's initiated holiday" saying that those were the people in the Colonies at the time...just saying WHO was here...
and she said, bc she does like to say the complete opposite, without even realizing what she's saying, but this time she had thought about this statement...
She said, in response to COlumbus Day and Thanksgiving (which is not a white holiday, i corrected myself - at that point slaves were being freed and african americans were able to celebrate it too - initiated by President Lincoln who African Americans credit for helping greatly with freeing them)
OK, HER COMMENT (she's ITALIAN!) - "I AM NOT WHITE."
I googled it, and considered it...
Her comment is so old, so NOT a current statement it really turns my stomach to hear her say that....BECAUSE...
JEWS, like myself, were once also thought not to be White.
but now, European Descent is considered WHITE!
Is Italy not in EUROPE!
so....there you go.
there's my coworker.
she literally feels she's not part of any group...tho she does identify with Christianity and feels her pastor would never guide people to support any candidate?
when i went to temple, they did mention politics.
is she sleeping during her Church services? i find it hard to believe that the church would not help unify and guide it's participants toward certain causes / politicians. in fact, i can't even consider it not to be the case! __________________________________________
About all your carbs with the beans and fruit, at least they are natural and healthy. this is an important thing to realize. maybe the servings too much, but way better than other options of indulgent eating...
i hope you plan something nice to eat / relax to some tv or something small anything small...on the day you are home :) maybe an extra decaf coffee ;)
i hope you have a great day. keep your head up. some people are just "crazy and deranged" haha. jk.
While I feel better today, if not a bit sleepy, I have no motivation to go to work this morning. None whatsoever. So I thought I'd log in while I wait for my raw broccoli to dry off a bit after cleaning.
I went to bed early last night -- 8:15pm? But husband was watching TV, so that kept interrupting my sleep.
On Saturday, I bought some nice treats for the work week: Fage Greek yogurt (plain) 5% milkfat, cottage cheese 4% milkfat, more cheese sticks, and a small flavored creamer for those afternoons that are difficult. Yesterday, I had the yogurt for lunch. Today, I am taking some of the cottage cheese. I still have 2 cheese sticks at work, so I'll keep my pack at work until I'm out. And the creamer is coming with me today.
Here's a look at my food menu today:
Progress as of today: 62 lbs lost so far, only -12 lbs to go!
How is the collagen working out for you?
Lunch sounds great, great idea with the squash and beans!
great eats!!!!!!!!
Also, for the same reason above, I am not going to buy any more hair/skin/nails gummy vitamins any more either. After about a year of buying these, again, no improvement in hair or nails. I think my nail problems are seasonal: in the winter they peel and chip so easily. My hair... well, I think I need something stronger. Going to discuss options when I meet with my new PCP in January.
The back of my heel was hurting yesterday, and I think it's from walking around too much in the wrong shoe. Wearing gym shoes for the remainder of the day yesterday and for most of today has helped. I will do anything to avoid getting injured like that.
Yesterday was difficult all the way around. This morning I woke up congested, so that explains why I was feeling out of sorts. I got some zinc supplements to help stave off getting any sicker. Last winter, my boss introduced me to zinc nasal swabs, which I think made a huge difference.
I rode my bike earlier this afternoon, so I'm looking forward to going to bed EARLY tonight. For some very odd reason, I woke up last night at 12:46a sweating. Sometimes that happens if I have a large dinner (or a binge), but none of that happened. Maybe that's all part of getting sick?
Progress as of today: 62 lbs lost so far, only -12 lbs to go!
"Day One or One Day - You decide."
I am not happy with my current plan. I realized this last night, and I think a lot of it has to do with the menus being posted on this site. I want to thank you all who do take the time to lay out what you eat, because it made me notice that my current plan is perhaps too restrictive. Don't get me wrong - low carb/keto works for the numbers. But I feel like maybe I'm missing out, or find myself wishing I had more flexibility in choices. Unlike Grains, I don't feel bored; I feel resentment. Anger. Hate. <<< Who needs THAT in their life?
As I am looking at 2019 as the Year of Remodeling, I need some changes. I've already made one. As you know, I often ride the fancy bike in the evenings to releave stress. It's a programmable bike, I can track my workouts on my phone, fancy schmancy blah blah blah -- Anyway, rather than going for "calories burned" (which probably isn't all that accurate), starting on Sunday, for the new week, my goals will be time-based. I really only need 20 minutes to crank it out and releave the day's stress and stiffness in my body, and not the previous 200-300 calorie goals I've been doing. This will free up more time in my evenings for other activites or going to bed early. This is a healthier approach for me, mentally & physically, but I'll re-evaluate and re-adjust as needed.
I decided on this after spending nearly 2 hours (!) trying to reach a 300 calories-burned goal. Ridiculous!
Yesterday was Mom's birthday (70 years), so I called her up to wish her a happy birthday. As you may recall, she's lost a lot of weight and kept it off, for many years. IDK how long, but the kids were in grade school still, and now they're adults, so it's been a while. In the course of our conversation, she told me that she's gained 20 pounds and is starting to work on that, before it gets out of hand. WHAT??? She didn't seem heavier when we visited in October... But she says it's either make changes now or buy new clothes, and she isn't going to buy new clothes!
So we talked about fresh produce and eating healthy, etc., and moved on. But I have to confess to you, fellow DD'ers, that this really hit me like a brick. It really is a never-ending battle, is it? There is no "before" and "after", because once you get to "after", it can still be a struggle to stay in After-land.
Progress as of today: 62 lbs lost so far, only -12 lbs to go!
This time will be different for me (although I've said that before). I've finally accepted the fact that if I want to remain at a certain weight, it will require continued effort. Daily at first, but hopefully weekly / monthly monitoring as I get used to maintaining.
And my emotions concerning this process are wide and varied. Sometimes bored, sometimes bitter, sometimes worn-out, sometimes ticked off. Weight, scales, fat percentage, carbs, calories, protein, etc - all of these things occupy way too much of my mental time.
And it might just be a seasonal blahs thing too.
Logging in from work on my phone, which I hate doing, but today is such a struggle against food. Maybe it's the snow and or colder weather... maybe it's genuine hunger.
The struggle is real.
Progress as of today: 62.5 lbs lost so far, only -12.5 lbs to go!
So I woke up today with that "excited that it's Friday" feeling... only to realize soon afterwards that today is Thursday. Usually this means it's going to be a very long day...
My husband is at the VA hospital today, for more evaluations, for most of the day, so he should have some good stories at dinner. Last night, he made shepherd's pie with sweet potatoes instead of mashed potatoes. I'm glad he made it because this was probably going to be one of our holiday meals. While I'm so thankful that he made dinner, I was not a fan of the sweet potato substitution. I think that the dish would have done much better with the cauliflower "pseudo mashed potato" thing... The bright side is because it wasn't a favorite, I didn't eat as much nor did I feel tempted at all to eat a lot of it.
I think I may be on to something there...
I mentioned something about trying to do some keto bakinig -- how this is my intention every weekend for the past 3 weeks -- and that got a very positive reaction. I would really like to make the gingerbread, but I might do the keto brownies first, since it's easier. My thinking is that easy baking will lead to enthusiasm for a more challenging recipe. (And honestly, the gingerbread recipe isn't all THAT more complicated. It just has more ingredients, which is what makes for a little more work.)
I'm actually starting to look forward to the collegan supplement in my morning coffee. It makes it a little more foamy than just straight creamer. However, I have not seen ANY improvement in my hair or nails. Winter reaks havoc on my nails - they split, peel, and don't grow very quickly. The collegan has not done anything to change that. Neither have the "hair/skin/nails" gummy vitamins I've been taking for quite some time. I recently ran out of those, and I'm not sure it's worth buying more of that either! As Happy (I think) suggested, I'd probably be better served by bone broth, which will be nice during the winter, at least.
Progress as of today: 62.5 lbs lost so far, only -12.5 lbs to go!
the meal he made sounds good...healthier of course with cauli mash! ....which reminds me, i want to make my own cauli mash!
if you want a good keto brownie recipe, the 4 ingredient ones that i made with coconut oil were the best ones and everyone at work liked them!
Bone broth is the BEST way to get collagen and great for slow cookers / crockpots. i ALSO want to make this a couple times in Winter. maybe freezing the broth in ice cube form...! to have it throughout winter as i like to!
also, your nails, will prob take some time to improve...not overnight!
Not impressed with the PA (physician's assistant) evaluating my husband's heart test results. Very quick to prescribe a new pill, didn't mention diet, exercise, the desperate need to lose weight, sodium reduction.
I pointed this out to her and she replied, "Oh, I just assumed he was doing that already because he talked about working out." Yeah, going to the gym once a week and thinking you can eat whatever you want (candy, emergency frozen pizzas, Burger King) isn't really a plan.
My husband was only too happy to take another pill if that will solve the problem without facing to put forth much effort.
Still, we had a Whole 30 dinner. I was hungry.
Progress as of today: 62.5 lbs lost so far, only -12.5 lbs to go!
yes, someone talk sense into someone that it's not only a magic pill that is necessary!
So I didn't mention this, but on Friday, my husband got his test results back showing that he has an enlarged heart. This really had him worried, but then he spoke with a friend, who happens to be a radiologist, who talked him down, assuring him that this is not too uncommon and can be cared for, with medication (high blood pressure medication), reduced salt intake, and probably losing weight. Ever since we returned from Vegas, I've been urging him to get back to losing weight, and this seems to have pushed him to do that. So he's getting back on Whole 30, and I will participate when we're eating together.
Ironically, I was talking with my mom, who herself has lost and kept off quite a bit of weight, saying how I've mostly given up carbs and sugar, but I won't give up my salt (yet) or caffeine. And now Mr. Donkey will most likely need to reduce his salt. Needless to say, Mrs. Donkey (me) is not too thrilled, but realizes that she needs to be supportive.
While my husband's health issues are not caused by excess weight, it seems as though every doctor's recommendation to him has included "... and lose weight."
Tomorrow, I'm taking time off of work in the afternoon to take Mr. Donkey to the doctor to discuss the results of the test, what he needs to do now, and probably a referral to a cardiologist.
Progress as of today: 62.5 lbs lost so far, only -12.5 lbs to go!
remember one thing...you CAN enjoy your food still. you can always add your salt on after it's made? since i'm sure you will not use too much anyways...
most of Mr. Donkey's diet is really YOUR DIET as it is now...if he were smart he could eat like you.
i urge you not to change your diet too much to support him because you DO eat healthy now.
really, i want to say it's Mr. Donkey that NEEDS TO CHANGE.
there's a lot of studies that say weightloss doesn't change overall health, but, i'd even more support your husband changing is diet a little bit and adding in some exercise - even home exercise.
and YOU keep being you. You are doing great, Jdonk!
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You got this, don't they say that if you do a kindness, it will make you feel just as good as the person you helped?
I do hear you about difficult days though, and wanting to wallow in the misery of it, even for a little while!
horn_of_plenty on 11/16/2018:
yes, it seems some things are piling up on you.
but trust me, Jdonk, please try to be thankful for the positive things. look for them. smile.
your end sentences here are good...that you will get thru and try your best. that is all we can do.... <3