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Donkey - Wednesday Feb 10, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 147.0

 I did well with eating,  yesterday,  but as I was getting ready for bed,  I realized I hadn't done any weights.  Not that I had planned weights or really wanted to do them.  It just never occurred to me. I've been experiencing some physical fatigue due to the impending TOM, plus busy at work... so maybe no weights until the weekend. 

Insanely busy at work again. I just couldn't keep up with balancing emails,  phone calls,  sending out letters to audiences,  sending out emails to clients.  Every time I stepped away from my desk, is come back to 5-9 more emails in my inbox. I finally caught up at around 4p (sort of) , leaving emails that could wait until today ---- except that today is supposed to be even busier!  

And so many conversations around me.  Associate Attorney making constant phone calls.  Boss on the phone or going around talking to coworkers.  Nice Lady finding any excuse to walk by my desk to talk to everyone.  With all this taking,  there was just no way I could listen to the impeachment hearings. 

To add salt to the wound,  Mistakes Girl told me yesterday that Queen Bee is coming back to cover her desk while she's on maternity leave. So that's like 6-8 weeks of having Queen at the office.  And she does not know how to open files correctly.  This will make more work for me, because she will not take directing from me,  nor am I inclined to even approach that hornets' nest.

I need to talk to the Boss about this,  but I have no time!

Progress as of today: 39.5 lbs lost so far, only 12 lbs to go!

grannyannie on 02/10/2021:
Sorry for the work disasters and stress and the return of Queen Bee! Reading about your work stress reminds me of my last job in the US - always busy.

horn_of_plenty on 02/10/2021:
TOM had me outta sorts...now just getting thru it these couple days over here...

...i hate that i am all semi-constipated with TOM...but at least the bloat has died down. it's always worst for me, with bloat, right before. it's better now...

compared to your workplace, mine is silent. not much talking and sometimes the time goes on for over a half hour with nobody saying a word! very peaceful. it's nice - you are left to your own work, less distractions, you can think about anything you need to do even for you, outside of work!

maybe just stay far away from the Bee unless she approached you or asks you for help...maybe stick to your own work while Bee is buzzing around.

Donkey on 02/11/2021:
I've interviewed at law firms that were so quiet you could hear an echo of every sound made. That's a bit extreme in the other direction.

In all reality, I don't begrudge anyone talking. Just don't talk around me. And again, it's the location of my desk that is the problem.

horn_of_plenty on 02/10/2021:
maybe you will have to show Bee what to do, per the boss' instructions. you'll have to figure it out...what to do.

Donkey on 02/11/2021:
I'm going to have to weigh the risk of giving her direction versus just doing it myself.

I think we need to think about looking into hiring someone, because if Mistakes Girl does come back, she wants to work part time, and this is a full time job.

Jacky82020 on 02/10/2021:
By all means, talk to Boss!

Maybe you can catch up on the weights on the weekend?

Donkey on 02/11/2021:
Definitely! I'm already gearing up for the weekend! I think for 1 week a month, I can put weights aside - I have given myself permission for this.

Maria7 on 02/10/2021:
Sounds like you are very busy! Still, I hope you have a good day and maybe get a chance to go outside and get some fresh air today. Take care.

Donkey on 02/11/2021:
YOU understand why I need my lunchtime walks! :-)

Most of my coworkers know I am busy and are letting me work, for the most part. That's good.

innerpeace on 02/10/2021:
I get anxious just readying your post. Not my most productive work environment, but I suppose you do what you have to do! Have a great evening.

Donkey on 02/11/2021:
Oh dear! I hadn't considered that! I sometimes come here and "dump" my work dramas here, as a release, but I had thought about how that spread negativity.

I've got to work on that!

Donkey - Tuesday Feb 09, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 147.0

 Insanely busy at work. I'm worried that if it's like this now,  in February,  what will it be like when the "rush" starts in the warmer weather?  Very foreboding...

Last night was yoga at 7p (at home), so I told Associate Attorney that I needed his letter before 5p. He has this habit of writing letters late in the day,  which then I have to stay later to send them out and update the file notes. For every letter,  there is about 10-15 minutes of follow-up work for me to do.  He was able to comply this time.  However,  I'm not always this lucky. 

I mention this because it's time to purchase another set of yoga classes with Jeanne (my yogi). If you recall,  last Fall, I took a break from yoga because I was just too darn busy at work. 

And for the first time since November,  before Thanksgiving,  I felt the pain of how short the remaining time I have at home after I come home from work and have dinner.  I felt very disconnected from my husband. I suppose it didn't help that rather than relax or enjoy my evening,  I had to shovel.  

I see that I need to start being very possessive of my free time now. IDK, it felt like yoga swallowed up a bunch of time,  shoveling took up a bunch of time... No time to just relax. 

Progress as of today: 39.5 lbs lost so far, only 12 lbs to go!

grannyannie on 02/09/2021:
How stressful! You need time to relax and enjoy hubby time after dinner (and yoga).

I'd be very annoyed when someone consistently waited too late in the day which meant I had to stay later at work.

Are you still thinking of looking for a different job?

Donkey on 02/09/2021:
Considering the Walmart job less, now that Mistakes Girl will be out on maternity leave. I know I don't owe my boss anything, but I feel that having 2 of us leaving (albeit hers is only temporary) would be an awful strain on my boss and in the firm.

However, I heard Associate Attorney say he knows someone personally, who got a job with Amazon and walks 8 miles a day. And I think I could get that at Walmart.

But would that be too much of a good thing? At my age?

Jacky82020 on 02/09/2021:
Could you do yoga at home without the classes?

I remember the olden days of yore when I had yoga books. Must be a lot of YouTube instruction and DVDs now. I buy used DVDs cheap on eBay. Movies. Cheaper than pay per view & they can keep the movie or give it away.

Donkey on 02/09/2021:
Ya know... when it's not a live class, I just don't do it. And paying for it is an additional kick in the butt to do it.

If I sign up for more classes, and I start to flake out, I can ask her to allow me a delayed access to that day's class. At least I would get my money's worth, if that makes sense.

legcramps on 02/09/2021:
Something needs to change if you are feeling more stressed about having to do yoga then using it as an opportunity to unwind. Would it work better in the morning?

Donkey on 02/09/2021:
I agree! And yet I do always feel better after her classes. So the activity in itself is beneficial. Hmmm... maybe this is something that will require an attitude adjustment on my part. I hadn't considered that, actually. This is good!

horn_of_plenty on 02/09/2021:
try not to worry about later at work because you are busy now...i think you are overcoming the work left for you also since you were out at least a week!!!

when he works on his letters too late, is there a chance you can have him date them for the next day to send out the next day? that is quite annoying to you...

like you felt, i never feel great about taking classes after work when i'm commuting from the city...if i was driving from a closer workplace home, possibly i'd consider taking weekday classes...so don't feel bad you had to cancel them as i'd never even consider them! LOL...but that's besides the point...

you just had some time off...yes...it does feel like time flies after work. you do what you want to do...even if not a class, you can do your own shorter yoga session that you make up of maybe less poses compared to the class?

honestly, that's why i do not do my lower body 3x per week...i only do it twice, on Thursdays and the weekends. But i do upper 3x, tonight is the extra day. HOwever, i do not do lower tonight also because it makes me ill to even think about having a workout that long on TUESDAYS AND thursdays...so i just grin and bare if for Thursdays, a full body...

what i'm saying is, it is YOUR LIFE and YOUR HAPPINESS...so you try to make a schedule that makes you content after work...perhaps it's just not that yoga class..or it's a yoga class on ONE day but the other is YOUR own yoga practice which is shorter.

Donkey on 02/09/2021:
About Associate Attorney and his letters: sometimes, if it's getting late or if I make the request, he will date his letters for the next day. But this letter in Monday was time-sensitive and had to go out.

You know, I hadn't considered a shorter yoga class! Wow! I will ask the teacher if we can work out a class package for shorter classes. I'm the only one that attends her evening Zoom class, so maybe she'd be willing to work with me.

Thank you!!!!

Donkey - Monday Feb 08, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 147.0

Ran out of time this morning to post my own entry, although I did respond to most of your entries and comments :-) 

Just wanted to boast though that I took the remaining chili and divided it up into single servings and froze the containers, so that I can grab one for my lunches at work.  Of course, we can always defrost 2-3 containers to have a full family meal, too, but I'm pretty sure that I'll end up eating these myself.  That's OK!  It was too good to waste! 

Progress as of today: 39.5 lbs lost so far, only 12 lbs to go!

grannyannie on 02/08/2021:
I do that every week - works great. Just froze some black bean chili. So now I have Tom Yum Gai and chili in the freezer. Wish I had a bigger one!

horn_of_plenty on 02/08/2021:
YEAH! great idea! and last night, i froze so much food, all the rice i had leftover in my fridge...i have SO MANY full meals to bring to work of protein, veggies, and rice. so nice! free food as i see it...money saved :) i am not sure i'll eat them all in a row, but, it's good that i have all of it to use often enough that i'm not spending as much as i did my first few weeks while working this new job. oh, it's great to have portioned meals ready in the freezer to grab for work! :) nice job. we are both so prepared.

Donkey - Sunday Feb 07, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 147.0

Good morning!  Bright and sunny and VERY cold outside.  I am keeping some of the curtains down, covering the windows, to help keep the house warmer. I will venture outside later on, to our backyard, which has a lot of snow, to refill one of the birdfeeders that rests on a pole. The pole has become frozen to the base, so I need a stepladder in order to reach the feeder part.  This should be an interesting adventure.

I did not walk on the treadmill yesterday, because it snowed again.  So shoveling instead of treadmill.  It was so cold out that my Fitbit stopped working for 8 minutes until I could get it warmed up again, once inside.  Also, I did not read yesterday either, and in this, I am disappointed in myself.  Oh well, moving on...

I feel that I did not do so well with eating less meat yesterday, although I did eat more vegetables.  No meat at lunch - had eggs as my protein source.  Snack was yogurt; I won't be buying more of that.  Dinner was shepherd's pie, which has ground beef and cheese.  My husband makes these HUGE portions, when it's really just the 2 of us.  Then we're stuck with all this food, and I'm stuck feeling obligated to eat it.  For example, last Sunday, he made a HUGE pot of chili.  There is STILL quite a bit of it left.  I know I could freeze the rest of it, but I still have frozen chili from the LAST batch that he made.  UGH!

I know that I am blessed to have food, and good food.  My complaint is with my worry of wasting food, especially meat. 

I did weights yesterday.  I have plans to walk on my treadmill when I am done posting here.  Chili for lunch.  Every year for the Superbowl, we've made "finger foods" for dinner and watched the game.  Not a single vegetable, but I'm planning on cutting up both a red and green pepper, to eat with hummus.  There's breaded mushrooms, and a cheese pizza for myself and a meat pizza (ugh) for the husband.  Daughter will probably want the cheese pizza when she comes home from work on break.

Progress as of today: 39.5 lbs lost so far, only 12 lbs to go!

grannyannie on 02/07/2021:
My husband makes a huge pot of dinner and that's good. It is so much work he wouldn't want to do that every night. And tastes just as good the next 5 or so nights.

Don't dismiss snow shoveling - it's exercise. I wish I had room for a treadmill. Having issues with my spin bike - can't get as hard a resistance as I had before. Hubby tried to fix and made some improvement.

Husband has been watching rugby. Not really a fan of American football.

Donkey on 02/08/2021:
I'm not a big sports fan, period. OK, maybe figure skating, but not so much any more. Tennis is OK. When I was working out at the gym, I even got into watching golf on TV - now that to me is is complete desperation. I'm not sure how that happened, but I started getting emotionally involved in the golf games I was watching, LOL...

Please read my comment to Bear above, regarding leftovers. I do agree that your husband has the right idea 100%.

grannyannie on 02/07/2021:
As for wasting food - we rarely throw out food. Husband thinks it's a mortal sin!

Donkey on 02/08/2021:
100% agree with that as well! And especially coffee, although that's not really for moral or environmental reasons as it is more about my caffeine addiction and the price of coffee.

horn_of_plenty on 02/07/2021:
I have been drinking “remarkable” amounts of water while at work too, seems to be good on my digestive system and keeping things going - and always has a nice effect on my skin :-)

About your Higher Power looking over you for you getting to go back to work early with little time to process = a good deal for sure. Def better to just push right back into work than to have it looming in your mind all weekend ...now going read another entry you wrote, from yesterday...

horn_of_plenty on 02/07/2021:
2.5 pounds is a big loss and some could be real and not just temp. Keep doing what you are doing ! :-)

Yup, a loss is a loss. No doubt about it! Life changes & work changes working in your favor on Friday regarding eating less.

Yes, you are beyond ready for the work you ate going back to. You are a seasoned pro. I have ALWAYS felt the looming and anxiety filled days after a holiday or vacation before returning to work and not knowing i would be ok and get thru it, but, eventually I most always did aside from the time I had a stomach virus during a district music festival and literally did not go - what a mess - when I was subbing as a band teacher I actually didn’t participate as I was feeling very very sick....other than that , even after whole summers off (which I am grateful for not having those types of extended vacations anymore as it was very hard to go back to work after them) it still always worked out. It always worked out, and it will for you ...

horn_of_plenty on 02/07/2021:
Regarding masking at work, I eat at my desk as we do not mask up in the office of 4 regulars and some that come 1x a week and they seem to wear masks when they come.... I wear a mask when. Heading to the busier office next door. You may decide to take some mask breaks at work or to just eat at your desk....

Donkey on 02/08/2021:
My desk is in the middle of the walkway, yep right out in the middle of everything and everyone walking by. It sucks.

I eat lunch at my desk when most folks are out, away, for lunch. I think I'm going to start eating in the small conference room, by myself. It is well lit and has a nice window.

horn_of_plenty on 02/07/2021:
I want to agree that having such a high cal cream in your coffee will hold you back and that’s why I now take my almond milk unsweetened to work. I feel I may have been able to lose a pound just by making this change and in my weight range, every pound lost is a huge step if you know what I mean!

Was talking to my boss and he knows bc I told him that I know a lot about food / nutrition/ calories from my own research.

If you ate say two Reece’s - the snack size portion - 220 cals a day for a year more than the calories you burn - so if you ate around 200 cals more than you burn everyday for a year, you gain 20 or so pounds at the end of the year.

Break it down - 50 cals extra per say per year is around 1/4 of 20 pounds - lost 5 pounds by removing 50 cals per day per year....if you get me.

horn_of_plenty on 02/07/2021:
So of the food your hubby makes, can’t you freeze it ?!

Also, I do not eat vegetarian either bc I never feel satisfied...same reasons as you. Doesn’t work for me with all my life eating meat and I also like meat but also that is the reason I feel meat Portions can be small bc they contain such high quality protein compared to what vegetarians eat ! :-)

Enjoy the rest of your day - it’s snowing here, too!

Horn_of_plenty on 02/07/2021:
i've never made breaded mushrooms...sounds so tasty...

Donkey on 02/08/2021:
Very tasty! But these mushrooms were rather tough. You had to put the whole thing in your mouth to chew up. I prefer fried mushrooms that take 2-3 bites to finish off. :-)

Donkey - Saturday Feb 06, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 147.0

 Good morning!  I love Saturday mornings!  It is nice and bright and sunny here - but oh so awfully COLD! 

I had a "good" weigh-in this morning, shedding 2.5 pounds of bloat.  I still feel the extra weight I'm carrying around, so there is still much work to be done.  I'm wondering if the "loss" this week is just a result of eating less yesterday - and not anything else, and thus, only temporarary.  I was so busy at work that I did not have time to eat too much.  This was a double-edged sword though, because I found it incredibly difficult to drink more water too.

Still, a loss is a loss, right?  And I should take it gratefully.  Definitely better than a gain.  And perhaps the loss is legitimate, as I have been waking up feeling hungry a few mornings this week.  

Returning to work:

I kept telling myself that if Horn could learn a new job in 3 weeks, I could surely survive a day at a job that I am already familiar with.

I ended up having breakfast at home, starting around 7:30am and ending around 8:15am   Earlier than I wanted to, but because I wear a mask at work, I can't really eat at my desk any more.  I avoided a morning snack, knowing that the family would be dropping off Chinese.  I started getting REALLY hungry around 11am - about the time I have a morning snack, when working - but lunch didn't arrive until after 12p.  I didn't eat a lot of lunch becasue I was so busy.  However, I did have yogurt at around 3:30p.  Tried to keep dinner on the lighter side (small ham & cheese sandwich) with a lot of vegetables (salad & spinach).

I did not walk at lunch at work. It's too cold, and with all the snow that we got recently, I could not be sure that the sidewalks would be safe.  I have 2 routes in mind to walk next week that I can walk at lunch, because it's side streets, and the traffic isn't too bad.  

I'm so glad that I went into work yesterday.  I reaquainted myself with the files, for the most part, nice to catch up with folks.  I'm ready for a busy Monday.  I'm really glad that Male Co-Worker pushed me to come back, because it wasn't going to get any easier.  Really struggled with the stress management - at one point, I felt like I was connected to an electrical shockwave up through my hair folicals on my head - seriously!  Didn't take much of a lunch break, or any break.  Yeah, not the ideal, but I'm hoping that I'll be on an even keal now, and can fit in better stress managing techniques in my day.

(I did bring home my yoga mat from work.  Doing yoga at work just isn't going to work, and I would rather have it here at home for stretching or floor work.  The odds of this happening are higher than doing the work yoga thing, unfortunately.)

I saw a blurb on some kind of news source last night about the benefits of having a more plant-based diet.  I've tried to go vegetarian so many times, with disasterous results.  So, like Bear, I'm just going to make an effort to add more vegetables and other non-meat/dairy products to a meal or snack.  I don't need a lot of meat, but I've found that I do need some.  My plan is to decrease my consumption - gradually, if necessary - of meat and dairy.  Meat will be easier to do than dairy.  I'll try this for a week and see where it takes me.

Also, I've been suspicious of this:  I think that having heavy whipping cream in my coffee is holding me back in my weigh-loss goals.  I switched to HWC when I was doing keto, and I can't go back to half-and-half or other creamers (e.g. Coffeemate).  The HWC is thicker - everything else now tastes watered down - and it seems to hold me better.  There are 50 calories per tablespoon; I finally measured out how much I've been putting in my coffee and it's just a little over a TBSP.  So I'm going to cut my portions on that per coffee cup.

And even though I drink a lot of water, I also drink 3-4 cups of coffee a day. I cannot drink it black.  I've tried adding coconut oil, other fats, to no avail.  IDK, this may just be something I may not be able to let go, but decreasing my portions is a start.

Goals for today:

  • My laundry (in progress)
  • Read
  • Upper body weights
  • 1 mile on the treadmill.
  • Trim cats' nails.


Progress as of today: 39.5 lbs lost so far, only 12 lbs to go!

grannyannie on 02/06/2021:
A loss is a loss. When I've been 'misbehaving' and then I'm very good with calories for a couple of days the scale tells me. But I don't question it.

I was vegan (6 months), then vegetarian (2 years?), the pescatarian (added fish) for about 9 years. When I was vegan (also quit sugar) I felt better than I ever have - energetic & healthy. But....I started missing eggs and cheese and milk chocolate, etc. 2006 I decided I was tired of having so few choices when I ate out and decided I'd add poulty. Uh huh. That lasted maybe 6 or 8 months. By the end of the year I was eating pork, beef, and British bacon.

grannyannie on 02/06/2021:
I don't drink milk any more - just soy, oat and coconut milks. But sometimes eat ice cream, milk chocolate etc.

Donkey on 02/07/2021:
No milk here either - just the heavy whipping cream for my coffee. I've been successful in cutting down my portions, from 3 spoons (a little over 1 TBSP) to 2 spoons (under 1 TBSP), so far, so I will maintain this.

There is a vegan alternative (Silk brand) to heavy cream. I want to try it to see if it works for my palate.

I love soy milk and oat milk. I haven't tried coconut milk.

Jacky82020 on 02/06/2021:
Glad work went ok.

So many diets! Whatever works is good.

Donkey on 02/07/2021:
Hoping that by focusing more on vegetables, it will help me consume less calories overall. This is going to be harder than I thought. Did not do so well last night, and kind of like what Legcramps mentioned - I'd totally start missing bacon.

Jacky82020 on 02/07/2021:
My focus has been vegetables for a while, but considering more protein drinks. Never much liked bacon. Don’t they make some healthier Turkey or vegan ones? Or do those taste crappy?

Donkey - Friday Feb 05, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 149.5

 Well,  here I am,  up early to get back into the old routine. 

The snow plow came by last night at 7:40p, so I went out to shovel last night,  rather than wait until this morning. This was a good call. 

We had plans to order Chinese takeout for lunch today,  so my family is going to bring me over something to eat, while I'm at work. That's so sweet of them to do that. 

I must be mindful and careful not to let my fear,  anxiety,  and dread, which I am feeling now, translate outwardly into crabbing & tension to others at work.  I do want to incorporate some of the things I gathered while soul-searching during my time off. Everything in its own time. 

Progress as of today: 37 lbs lost so far, only 14.5 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 02/05/2021:
Friday would be the perfect type of day to head back to work...because the weekend comes right after it!!! amiright!?

i'm glad you will have just this friday, as like a pre-view to set up for your Monday...it's a good day, today, to get organized and see what needs to be done and have yourself perfectly organized for next week, i'm sure.

also nice is Chinese. you can be healthy with it.... ;) ....you can!

also a diet coke is nice after chinese! the sweet to counteract the salty...

you make me want chinese...but i will save my cash for now...i have so much food at home....i'm busy this month paying off extra credit card expenses (not usually something i need to do...) because i bought some used shoes/cardigans and now these socks for work amongst buying more food and also new things for my new guinea pig, etc...i'll catch up with my credit by March, no biggie ;)

but you enjoy the Chinese...i'm sure i'll have either Chinese or Thai in the next couple weeks or so too! <3

I'll comment about your previous entry when i read it, later today!...I'll make my comment here so you do not miss it.

Jacky82020 on 02/05/2021:
Hope your first day back ar work goes well, donkey, Have a positive feeling it will indeed! Nice about the Chinese food, sweet gesture.

grannyannie on 02/05/2021:
Enjoy your lunch!

Donkey - Thursday Feb 04, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 149.5

As Horn pointed out, today is already Thursday.  If I were at work, today would be greeted with much more anticipation than it is, knowing that my time off is soon coming to an end. I'm very grateful for this experience. I definitely learned a lot about myself, maybe what other folks are going through with self-isolation (because of this awful COVID), what I want in life, how I would use free time if given to me... 

We are anticipating another weather system - OK, let's just say it:  SNOW - starting around noon.  They are forecasting 5 more inches of snow, and then frigid, frigid temperatures coming in from Canada.  (Legcramps - I thought of you while watching the weather forecast last night!)  I went to fill up my car with gas, so that when I do return to work, and my car has to sit out all day, it will be OK, and it will have plenty of fuel to warm it up before I hit the road.

I thought about goals.  I have determined that I think what really works best for me, right now, is to have goals for the day, so that I don't just sit around doing nothing or watching TV, but not anything too long-term.  Yesterday, I got out my ankle weights and did some inner and outer thigh exercises.  Then, I did a 10-minute ab video on YouTube. I also did shoulder exercises, using 3 & 5 pound weights - have to be careful because of pain.   I'm not sure I did those ab exercises correctly because I am feeling no pain today. 

Today, I did quads and hamstrings weights.  I may do some more upper body, or perhaps a yoga flow, or maybe just some push-ups.  I guess I've reconciled myself that if I'm going to be larger than I would like to be, that it might as well be muscle instead of flab.

Dinner last night went reasonably well.  Measured out portions, BUT then there were a few leftover fries, and THOSE I *didn't* measure.  But it was less than 1/4 cup.  I have been drinking remarkable amounts of water.  With this I am pleased, and I can only hope that I can maintain this when I return to work.

Things to Do Today:

  • Mop main level 
  • Mop basement floor
  • Daughter's  Husband's laundry
  • Puzzle
  • Read 
  • Treadmill

EVENING EDIT:  I did OK at dinner, watching portions.  However, right now, I'm feeling very anxious - I'll explain - and I feel like diving into the sweets. However, once I am done posting here, I will shut down the kitchen and move away from the food. I have the sugar-free gummies and sugarless gum if I need a crutch.  Right now, I'm working on a cup of decaf coffee.

The reason for my anxiety is because I am going back to work tomorrow, rather than Monday - much sooner than I had anticipated.  I got a call around 3:30pm from Mistakes Girl, explaining that she will be out of the office tomorrow afternoon from 1pm to possibly the end of the day, translating for Associate Attorney (and he tends to draw out closings for the longest time possible).  So there will be nobody to work on my emails.  

Male Co-Worker said, it's either you come in or we have Nice Lady work on your files.  Well, that did it.  I don't want her working on my files.  She has her own way of doing things, which messes things up, and she doesn't link everything (emails, attachments, etc.) to the database.  So you have NO idea what she has done because there's no record of it, without going back and searching through eons of old emails.

It's probably better this way.  (Horn:  this is one of those moments where I feel like I've got an angel or higher power looking out for me.)  It would be much harder to come back on a Monday, which are very busy.  Fridays are usually quieter because everyone is at closings. 

And coming back wasn't going to get any easier.  This way, rather than having a whole weekend to think about it and binge eat, now I have only a couple of hours to process this, and I can manage the stress of it much better.

It has been snowing heavy, wet snow.  Husband went out to shovel around 3p.  I went and shoveled around 5pm.  Then it stopped, but it looks like it's going to snow until about 10p.  I think I will start preparing to go to bed, maybe do a facial or something, have herbal tea or water, read my meditation books (10 minutes minimum), and then watch the weather before I go to sleep.  

I would much rather wake up a little earlier tomorrow, and do any shoveling then. I'm sure that I'll have to shovel the mouth of the driveway from the load that the ####### snowplow will leave when it comes by again.  

Progress as of today: 37 lbs lost so far, only 14.5 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 02/04/2021:
Such a busy girl! Good for you, getting all that accomplished.

grannyannie on 02/04/2021:
Good workout! Ankle weights are very effective.

A goal a day is a great idea.

Jacky82020 on 02/04/2021:
I’m glad you’re going back tomorrow since that’s better for you. Hugs.

Donkey on 02/04/2021:
Psychologically, I think it will be better and less painful to do it this way.

Jacky82020 on 02/04/2021:
Makes perfect sense! Nice it played out this way. You have good karma.

Donkey - Wednesday Feb 03, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 149.5

The last Wednesday of freedom - oh, I mean quarantine.  I've got to stop thinking about this time off in these terms.  It's not uplifting nor positive.

Last night's dinner was not a practice in moderation or portion control.  Way too many carbs.  Way too many calories.   Today is a new day to do better.  It seems that drinking more water didn't do much to curb my appetite nor reduce my deisre to eat. 

  • Hamburger 150 calories
  • Swiss cheese slice 200
  • Hamburger bun 120
  • Salad w salad dressing 100
  • Cheez Its (Buffalo Wing flavored - oh my!) 180
  • Hershey's Kiss 25
  • Coffee w Creamer 50

And this is on the conservative side.

I caught myself this morning, preparing and eating breakfast out of habit, even though I wasn't really "hungry" per se, but rather just keeping to a routine.  It didn't even occur to me to delay breakfast until around 10am - staving it off with coffee until then.  

I think yoga 2x a week is fine.

Getting through the meditation books as I can.  Sometimes, at the end of the day, I just don't have it in me to read. 

I think I will find certain activities to be more enjoyable if I do them as I want to, rather than setting up structured goals like "a chapter a day" or "30 days of push-ups".  I would appreciate any feedback on this statement.

Portion control, portion control, portion control. 

Progress as of today: 37 lbs lost so far, only 14.5 lbs to go!

Maria7 on 02/03/2021:
I'm with you on the breakfast thing but Hubby, who is retired, is used to my cooking breakfast for us and so I do it for him and I eat what I want in moderation and it keeps me going for hours.

Jacky82020 on 02/03/2021:
Depends upon the person, your comment re activities. Some like rigid structure and others not so much. A day or days off would be ok with me. Even longer, depending. And there are alternatives. Like instead of one exercise you could do another. I am an avid reader and never read anything that doesn’t engage me. So many books I began & quit. Movies too.

legcramps on 02/03/2021:
Yes I agree that you should take the week in a more positive light. No use in thinking about WHEN you go back to work; it will be what it will be. What can you do right now to help yourself be in a better frame of mind?

Your statement regarding structured goals... depends what the goal is for me. If it's to read more books, well, I can only do that if the book i'm reading is actually engaging - so maybe the goal should be "enjoy time spent reading" rather than "read three chapters of book titled How Not To Enjoy Your Life".

If the goal is something like finishing my nutrition course, well that's a little different. That's something I know I will not always enjoy, but must work through anyways. In that case, i'll make it more structured so that I have time already set aside for it.

I have tried to set strength training goals in the past, and will usually get about three weeks into it and then it will die off. I don't have a good answer for this type of goal, except to share what I do, which is to fit it in when the opportunity presents itself. Maybe Monday it's pushups and squats at home, maybe Friday it's structured time at the gym with free weights. Maybe Sunday it's bike-hiking a 40 pound bike up and down hills for an hour.

grannyannie on 02/03/2021:
It's a struggle to feel motivated during this time when things are definitely not 'normal'. I crave carbs as well.

Have you read any books by Thich Nhat Hanh?

horn_of_plenty on 02/03/2021:
I agree about the thing you are asking for feedback about - as soon as we push ourselves to do something more than a reasonable amount it begins to feel like a chore and becomes something we loathe instead of a buoy. Totally yes.

It’s another one of those “less is more,” or simply “moderation.” Which can be so hard for overachievers ;) ;) ;)

Thank you for your comments- so helpful that I’m copying and pasting what you said and emailing to myself bc it’s good knowledge to have on types of courts like probate, then the local bc the state courts, etc....it’s good knowledge for me to actually retain in an email which is my favorite way to remember things !

horn_of_plenty on 02/03/2021:
Your dinner doesn’t sound very out of control, nice job mostly staying moderate ! Really only The chips were an indulgence but still just about a serving. Not bad !!

Oh lastly, I can if nothing hungry I eat breakfast straightaway at work - sometimes I say for myself it’s ok to stick to a routine - or just have breakfast first thing . I totally get your thinking though.

grannyannie on 02/04/2021:
Donkey, you should do jump rope on a softer surface - I do it on carpet. Working out on a concrete floor (Uganda) is I'm sure what cause me to get plantar fasciitis.

Donkey - Tuesday Feb 02, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 149.5

I'm having problems getting out of bed, still, knowing that at this time next week, I'll be getting up to go to work.  Mistakes Girl texted me yesterday, to see how I was doing, and I told her I was afraid to come back to work, because I won't know any of the files and I won't remember how to do the job.  Oh well...

In spite of feeling this way yesterday morning, I did manage to have a productive day!  Washed sheets, did upper & lower body weights, had a great yoga session, cleaned the stovetop, read a chapter in both meditation books I checked out, shoveled, took out the trash & recycling.  So I have high hopes that today will be a fulfilling day as well. I think I will wash our comforter today, and perhaps the daughter's comforter tomorrow.

I drank a lot more water yesterday, in an effort to eat less.  I want a new water bottle that has the capacity to hold more water than my current bottle - I'm thinking a half a gallon.  It seemed to me as though drinking more water more often throughout the day helped with eating less.  IDK, I can feel that I'm holding on to excess weight.  It's very uncomfortable.

AFTERNOON EDIT:  I went on the treadmill this afternoon and now my left hip is irritated again.  A 4.0 mph speed is jogging for me.  I jogged 0.75 miles and walked 0.5 miles.  I will try some stretches tonight.  I just took some Aleve.

I would also like to do some upper body *something* today.  I think that I will try to do some push-ups.

I forgot to mention that I tried jumping rope like Annie does.  I was able to do the 2 sets of 25 jumps.  However, jumping rope in the garage is a no-go, because of the concrete floors.  It may be easier to do on the wooden floor in the family room, but the jolt of the impact was quite startling.  

Now I just have to hold it together through dinner...  It's been kind of a carb-y day.

Progress as of today: 37 lbs lost so far, only 14.5 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 02/02/2021:
Listen to Bear. You’ll be just fine when you come back to work....I’ll write more later. Rest is nice, sleep in while you can ;)

horn_of_plenty on 02/02/2021:
Oh your idea of a bigger water bottle is great as long as you clean it often!

I would prefer to use a large water bottle as I get up often to refill my cup that I throw out daily, for now, during the pandemic I have decided not to be washing both coffee cups or water cups at work. It’s provided free so I just take a new one daily which is horrible for the environment but that’s the protocol amongst my coworkers and I’m not yet up to breaking it. There’s also nowhere to hang cups/plates to dry so I never wash anything at work like I used to (used to wash my tubberware before going home). Now I just wipe it as work with a towel, and clean it back at home....

Jacky82020 on 02/02/2021:
Dang, half a gallon! That would be heavy if you have to lug it around.

Jacky82020 on 02/02/2021:
I used to jump rope, but not for a while. Excellent exercise.

Think you can freeze cream cheese

Donkey - Monday Feb 01, 2021
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 149.5

This is my last week of quarantine, and I'm rather disappointed in myself for sleeping in late.  I want to grab as much time as possible, but I just could NOT muster up the motivation to get up out of bed. 

My problem is clearing in the eating.  I had a sugar binge Saturday night, right before my Zoom meeting - I'm sure that's what triggered it, but also, I was just really upset at my weigh-in.  Yesterday, Husband made a delicious pot of chili and I had 2 helpings, plus a bunch of tortilla chips (which I did not bother to weigh nor moderate).  But this is a new month and I'm putting all of that behind me, and focusing on moving forward.

I just realized that I set no goals for myself this month!  But you know, I think that's OK.  I set up goals and then either fall short and feel bad about it, or push myself hard to meet the goals and feel bad about it.  So this month, I'm focusing more inward (nutrition) and not so much on the outward physical aspect (exercise).  This doesn't mean that I'll stop exercising, but I'm not setting any exercise goals for myself.  I'm working  more on food, stress management, water intake, self-comforting.

One thing that I want to do is to start the 21-day meditation book that I checked out from the library.  This will help me in 2 ways:  I can read it before bedtime, and then do the meditation exercise as preparation for sleeping (that's a suggestion that the author makes).  This will keep me from watching the news and/or checking my phone right before sleeping - doing both of those things is NOT recommended for a peaceful sleep.  The chapters are short; there are 21 chapters.  

For today:

  • In the middle of a load of cat laundry, which is in the dryer.
  • Maybe wash sheets once daughter wakes up, so that I can do 1 load.
  • We had a light snow overnight and the city plow just came by leaving a pile at the mouth of the driveway again.  Once I finish here, I'm going to go outside to shovel.
  • Work on the puzzle
  • Read Chapter 1 in the meditation book
  • Yoga class tonight!

(This is NOT a to-do list, but just a look at my day.)


Progress as of today: 37 lbs lost so far, only 14.5 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 02/01/2021:
Sometimes the best goal is to do as best you can & that’s enough.

Re sugar binges, I am finding frozen fruit delicious, topped with sugar free syrup, the kind you see in coffee shops. The caramel, chocolate and almond worked well. Walmart has a big 4 pd bag of mixed frozen fruit. Also have mixed berries. Bananas are good too. I eat them frozen.

Lots of snow here! And cold! Expecting big gas bill.

horn_of_plenty on 02/01/2021:
Good plans for a beer month. And I have been super lazy since I got home. I think it’s turning into a rest day here, especially since I doubt I’m going to work tomorrow bc my boss basically told me he’s not which means I am not...except he’ll be working at home...but not I.

The chili sounds amazing. Another thing I should learn to cook and often !

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