Having second thoughts about leaving work early to go to Chair Yoga. My boss is not leaving for his road trip until tomorrow, and I kind of feel like I should be there for his last day.
Husband said he'd go to Chair Yoga without me, which is good.
It's a good thing I went to Chair Yoga ... for my own sanity. For some reason, I am having an especially difficult time, recently, accepting the dysfunctional work environment. To be fair, it's always been there, but it is bothering me more than usual. Chair Yoga was a nice break, but when I returned to the office, the stress was soon upon me.
I actually think that I'll be less stressed with my boss gone than with him around, even if it means that there won't be an attorney around to make decisions. I mean, Associate Attorney is there, but to ask him is more work than it's worth.
Next month, my husband and I will go to Chair Yoga separately so that it's more like a long lunch hour for me, rather than time off. That is a workable solution.
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
So you'll have to forgive me, but today was just one of those days where "WTF" seemed to be an appropriate response to just about everything.
Breakfast went fine. They changed their coffee so now it tastes good and normal. I had a Santa Fe omlette that I seriously fell in love with. I cut it in half and cheese just OOZED out of it. Yum. I also felt that I was able to carry on a significant part of the conversation, although afterwards, I realized just how much of that was untrue - mostly my professional opinion of Associate Attorney.
So I get back to the office and Nice Lady is there. She is wearing athletic compression stockings - think like baseball players wear - and gym shoes. She is completely upright, walking back and forth, quickly -- I was flabbergasted. Literally, like WTF. In fact, that's exactly the first thing I said to Mistakes Girl when I got back. I'm like, What the h*** happened to all that crippling back pain, where she needed crutches and a walker? Where she was taken to the ER in a stretcher on Friday? Where she couldn't come into the office on Monday because of the pain?
I feel like I've been lied to, actually. I don't know if this was her Drama Queen thing again in a major way, or if she's doing this for the pain meds, or what.
She says she's still going to the orthopedic doctor on Thursday, to let the doctor know she's having an MRI scheduled on Friday. Secretly, I'm thinking to myself, PLEASE keep your appointment, PLEASE go to the doctor - because at least that way, she'll be out of the office.
Oh and at the end of the day? Associate Attorney called her 5 times, to talk about his day, what's going on tonight, what's going on tomorrow... WTF.
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
However, I do see what you are saying, and know that there is some truth to that. After all, the important thing is that she's feeling better.
But next time, I won't let myself get so emotionally invested in her problems.
I was not going to log in thinking it was so late. Looked at the clock, 8:09pm -- that's hardly too late. So I decided to take a few minutes and comment and write.
I did very well today. My eating was definitely on the lighter side.
Tomorrow morning, I am meeting up with Associate Attorney and 2 real estate agents (a tag-team) that we've worked with to connect and chat. I do not want to do this on many levels:
I'm busy at work. A delay in the morning can throw off a whole day.
I'm not really into the big breakfast thing.
Last time I was at this restaurant, the coffee was kind of funky tasting. They use chickory (?) so it has a very strange, strong taste to it.
But there is no getting out of this. The agents want to meet me, and this is a good marketing thing for Associate. I do want to see him succeed, but I just wish he would step up and take more initiative.
Nice Lady has hurt her back. The CAT scan shows that she has a fracture in her spine. She was supposed to get MRI's done today, but long story short, that didn't happen as scheduled, so she will have to try again, probably next week.
Rememer she is a little bit of a drama queen, so yes, she might make a miraculous recovery, but seeing as she is 72 or 73, I am wondering if this is a result of osteoporosis.
The good in all of this is that the next time I go to the doctor, in February, I am going to request a bone density scan for myself.
(The bad in all of this is that we're all kind of speculating about when she'll come back, if she'll come back, and if she doesn't come back, what will happen to Associate Attorney, because he relies on her far too much.)
Logging off for now. Getting enough sleep is a priorty for me -- especially since I MUST get up promptly tomorrow, so that I have enough time to do my daily routine before leaving for this breakfast thing. I think I'm going to get a Mediterranian omlet, and bring half of it back to the office.
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
Good plan for breakfast, you can even ask the waiter to wrap up half the omelette while the others are eating if it's tempting you. also, decaf coffee / water is a good help...if you need to keep your hands/mouth busy.
wow, never had a coffee like you describe, i don't think?
i get what you are saying about nice lady. update us on what happens...and yes, keep taking care of yourself. i feel that you must have some strength in that donkey body of yours, as you are a bit active and not sedentary.
glad to hear you are focused on the sleep thing too. it's something i've been doing much better too - and getting thru the past couple weeks has been a lot easier for me, too. :)
I hope your breakfast goes alright...
Kind of a wet, grey day here, and it kind of matches my mopey mood, but I'm not going to let the weather stop me today... I just have to get started, LOL...
I am going to a specialty grocery store with my daughter and then drop off cans at the animal shelter (part of their fund raising). They are at opposite ends of town, so it will be some nice mother-daughter time, which is so limited these days. I'm trying to avoid a Walmart trip today, if I can.
I have finished 2 of the 3 books I checked out from the library on aging. The first one, Going Gray, was about someone my age. The second one, Being Mortal, was about maintaining the dignity of one's life at the end: assisted living, nursing homes, difficult conversations, palliative care, hospice, quality of life versus quantity of life (with respect to medical care).
I'm about to start the 3rd book, which is written by a woman in her 70's. I'm looking forward to it.
My husband surprised me today by saying that he's willing and wanting to check out the Chair Yoga classes at the new yoga studio in town. It would be $10 for an hour class, no long term commitment. Wow! The classes are Tuesday and Thursday mornings, each taught by a different instructor. So I encouraged him to try both, when he's up to it, and if he likes it, to consider keeping up with it.
I wish I could go with him...
This week is Library Chair Yoga, on Wednesday, and I'm already looking forward to my half-day off. My boss is going on a road trip Wednesday, returning next Tuesday. That will be a nice break for all of us as well, although... this will mean we will have to rely on Associate Attorney. Oh well....
Again, I am struggling with trying to find something in my life that brings me joy. Maybe this is because the Great British Baking Show has started a new season on Netflix. I feel like I"m just trying to push through the weekdays to get to the end of the day, to the end of the week, to have time for myself. I end up resenting things that come up on weekends because it takes away from the precious Me Time that I have.
When I found out that Legal Clinic was canceled this month, I was so happy. That is not a good sign. I was just dreading it this month, because it takes up half of my Saturday. And also because this month, I'd be doing more work that I usually do, because we would be down a volunteer. Turns out, we're down too many volunteers, so they just canceled the clinic. Normally, I do love going to clinic. So I'm not sure what's going on there...
I know that whatever it is that I'm looking for, to bring me joy in my days, it won't be work. Since we're not going to be moving any time soon - made that decision a couple of weeks ago - I've decided to stay put at my job for now, even though this may be a mistake in the long run - as I have a decent salary and insurance assistance. So now that things will remain status quo for a while, I have the time to think about what I want to do with the remainder of my time.
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
i'm so glad your hubby wants to go to chair yoga instead of sitting at home. i hope he sticks with it. how will he get there?
maybe think of the weekend activities you don't enjoy that much as being things you appreciate being able to do and glad you don't have to be stuck at home? (i am in the process of changing up my own practices/mindset for the week/weekend...)
a decision is a decision and if you want to stay at your job, i can DEFINITELY understand why. i would almost always opt to stay in a job that looked like i could have it for longer and no chance of being let go (my current job there's unknowns about where i'll go when this project ends...the unknowns are too stressful for me)... anyways, with a career like yours, i would think you could find a job again if you moved doing the same thing?
how is your son doing now? are you still in touch with him?
My husband can still drive, so that is how he will get to yoga, but quite honestly, since he can't turn his head, it's not as safe for him to drive any more. Short, familiar runs he can do alone. Anything longer, like driving towards Chicago, he usually wants someone to go with him, to check the blind spots for lane changes.
Real estate in the Chicago area is about to change dramatically in the next 3-5 years. We are one of the last areas that uses attorneys for real estate transactions. Most everyone else uses real estate agents.
If we moved to Las Vegas, I would have to find a completely new line of work. That could be real estate related, but it might just be a transfer of office skills. I could work for an attorney, but there aren't too many other areas of law I would want to work in.
One of the areas I would be interested in would be bankruptcy, but Nice Lady -- who isn't really even an employee of my boss, she came with Associate Attorney when we hired him -- kind of took that over as hers, and hers alone.
We hear from our son every week when he calls, and sometimes more often through text. He says that if he can get through September, he is confident he'll be able to finish his job training. It's been kind of a roller coaster for him.
yeah 5k's are good to get moving, and i am recovering faster after them.
you are right that this is a short term plan, i can try much harder here...or rather plan smarter.
Off to the Legal Clinic Volunteer Appreciation Breakfast.... Truth be told, just between us, I'd rather not go, for many reasons. Hopefully, those reasons won't matter once we get there.
AFTERNOON EDIT: The breakfast was fine and I'm glad I went. In past years, it's been much more, with more turnout. This event was a little anemic, but it was nice to meet up with the other ladies I work with, especially since there won't be a legal clinic this month.
Came home and went for a nice walk, after sitting for almost 2 hours, and then sitting again on the drive home. Not feeling particularly inspired today.
Yesterday, work was one crisis after another. It was very draining. I met the husband and daughter at the diner for dinner, which was nice, but I was so empty that I wasn't really all that excited about it.
So that I want to just relax, read, nap, today is OK.
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
good choice to be active once getting home after sitting. it's what i would also have tried to do...
are you doing what you want to do today (sunday)?
i'm making lots of changes like you, working on a new schedule to reach my goals. weights are out for the time being. i may even move them to my garage for storage.
Still here... Not a lot of time to write today. I'm very tired. I think the "mindful eating" has resulted in a calorie deficit, which is great for losing weight, but not so good on energy. I feel like I could sleep for a million years.
Some of it might be work stress. Trying to keep a light-hearted tone at work, keeping everything positive, but it wears me down. (Being negative or venting though, isn't the answer. That would not help build me up, if that makes sense.)
I have a volunteer appreciation breakfast tomorrow morning, for legal clinic, so while it's "fun" and "free food", right now, it seems exhausting.
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
Reflecting back, I do think it was the stress from work that was causing the fatigue.
sometimes i guess after a week of slacking on sleep, it feels good to catch up (my opinion).
yes, anyone can be negative / whine about work. and trust me, everyone does, everywhere. yes, it will not help much. you can always write it here there, just to get it.
i also get weary on social things like your volunteer clinic, it is sometimes and not all the time which is good..perhaps schedule it so afterwards in your schedule is "you time"
Quick check-in:
One thing that I want to work on - REALLY work on - is getting rid of the careless eating. For example, when I prepare my food for work, I sneak in a handful of nuts, or a bite of cheese, or a bite of something else. NO. This is not mindful, intentional eating. It is a bad habit, and a good way for extra calories to sneak in without really being accountable to them.
MUST get back to weights. I do not want to lose the upper body gains that I achieved over the summer months doing push-ups. I WANT to do this.
A new yoga studio opened up near me. I could theoretically walk to it, but it would be much better if I rode my bike or drove. Unfortunately, they opened in August, and I just now learned of this, so I missed all of the deals. They do not offer free classes, and about half of the classes are during the workday, unfortunately, but they do offer some evening classes that looked good to me.
Most of the classes they offer are slower paced, stretching and relaxing, which is more of what I want/need from yoga, at least at this time. They do offer Chair Yoga, but I don't know if my husband would go by himself and if he had to pay for it.
They do offer "name your own price" meditation sessions, which that I might consider trying. I was thinking $5.
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
just like you want to get weights, i have come to a realization that i now need at least a bike in my apt. i don't think i want to try and get reimbursed for it though. i think it could cause problems if i try, so i will not try. (reimbursements are usually for copays or office visits...or if you can get a dr's note....i am not sure i want to be reimbrused for a bike right now.)
$5 seems fair if it's name your price. i think they would be just providing a room for you to do your own meditation in????
this yoga studio sounds amazing and i hope you can try it.
the reason i have to get a bike in my apt is that it works diff muscles from the stepper/walking/jogging and it's already getting darker faster and cooler soon....and i know my biking outside days after work are ending soon.
Logging in a little later than I might normally do on a day off, because I wanted to get my exercise and errands out of the way first. The weather could not be more perfect for a day off - it is warm, but not too hot, and sunny but with some clouds, so it's not burning hot.
I am almost done with the book about going grey, ironically titled "Going Gray". Early on in the book, she mentions that she is 49 (when she starts this "research" project, which ended up being this book), which is right where I'm at, so this is really one of those "right books at the right moment" situations. While I haven't finished it, I did want to mention that what really speaks to me in this book is that accepting one's greyness is really about self-acceptance. and embracing where one is at, at that moment.
Staying mentally young isn't about the color of my hair, but being open to new things, whether it's ideas, or technologies, or experiences. This is definitely something that I need to keep in mind for myself, because I tend to get stuck in my ways, which can be offsetting to those around me. Plus, being stuck in my ways means I might miss out on things that I would otherwise enjoy or benefit from. I am hoping that the next book I have waiting for me (Women Rowing North) will speak to this "un-stuck-ness". My goal is to work on my mindset or focus, so as not to be so stuck, but rather, to be more open. In turn, I hope that it will also develope some peace of mind or contentment.
Speaking of being more adventurous, keeping an open mind: Yesterday, while I was taking a walk, I started to think about how I think my running days are really over. With my back and hip issues, I'm thinking that it's time to start being more guarded and protective of my mobility, rather than trying to push my limits. (Granted, this is not being open-minded at all, but this was before I read those chapters in the Going Gray book...)
So of course, after dinner, my daughter mentions that she'd like to do a 5k race with me. Where were you 3 years ago when I could run??? UGH!!!! She doesn't really want to run or win any race, but rather wants the t-shirt and hot cider or hot chocolate at the end of the race, LOL.... There is an animal shelter that does a 5k event that I might consider. I would need more information, but I suppose it's something to try with her. It might be fun...
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
i am not ready to face the face that i may be at the turning point to in terms of actually getting better in my fitness....grrrr...
but, it is true that it's better to take care of your body than to beat it down.
there are still ways to strengthen...
I need someone orange in my life.
Happy September! A new month, a new season, new goals...
I am quite pleased to report that I got some good sleep last week! With the exception of Friday night into Saturday, because I stayed up too late, I got over 7 hours of sleep each night! Even my short night, I got 6.5 hours of sleep, which isn't too bad for a lack of sleep. This is something that I'd definitely like to to maintain or focus on.
I confess that I haven't thought of any concrete goals for this month, yet, but looking at my calendar, I see that there are many new potential adventures. Not this week but the following week, I will be attending "Yin Yoga" (free at the library). Also, the yoga studio is offering 3 free classes on Sundays this month, with their "trainee" instructors. I hope that I will have the courage to go back and try. I am also taking a half-day off on 9/11, so that I can do Chair Yoga (at the library) with my husband, seeing as Veterans' Yoga was canceled this month. Theoretically, with the exception of this first week of September, there is a free yoga opportunity available every week. Yay?
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
nice job getting into yoga and FREE!? how awesome is that!
My calendar seems pretty packed actually for the fall season! in October for instance, i am signed up for THREE 5k's! i am excited and will do some walking and some jogging for them. but by taking part in the 5k, it takes a lot of power out of my legs (yes, really), and i have to be more focussed on my planning on how i will still plan for my own cardio goals. however, a 5k is much shorter than 5 miles and i do think they will all go pretty well...being that it's still a lovely time of year, let's all keep up our goals and stay fit..
I remembered to weigh in this moring - LOL. Glad to see that the number is still within maintenance range. I know my weight was a lot lower at the beginning of the year, but this 131-136 range is just about right for me, at my heigh of 5 ft, 3 inches (sorry I do not know the metric conversion off the top of my head) with a large bone structure.
My pain subsided and reconciled eventually. I'm rather embarrassed to say that it was TOM cramping that woke me up early Thursday morning. TOM affects my joints too, with swelling, soreness and sciatica down my right leg. My back and hip problems are more vulnerable during TOM as well. I've been to my doctor, who says that other than the anemia (which I am managing with OTC vitamins), everything else is OK. My boss' daughter, who is a physical therapist, says that as long as I am pain free and able to move, then no other adjustment or action is required or recommended even - the old "if it ain't broke, don't fix it." Once the hormone surge passes, I go back to normal, and thank goodness for that. I truly am grateful for that.
I had goals and errands for this morning, but then I realized that we have a parade going through town, and won't be able to get out of my subdivision until after the parade is over at noon.
I have a lot of thinking to do today... Goals, both inside and out. Really, seriously, it's time for some serious work. This burro needs to get back on track.
EVENING EDIT: Did well -- but no weight training! -- but found myself being NOT so mindful & intention when it came to eating. That is to say, I felt that I was munchie today, and reaching for food.
Some of this was from thinking about work stuff, some of which I wrote about but deleted, because I realize that I do what I do to survive at work and get my work done. My work environment is toxic, and unfortunately, sometimes that rubs off on me, too. I own up to my mistakes when I make them, and that's all I can do.
My work-life balance is out of whack again, so I'm going to use the remainder of the weekend to reset my focus.
Progress as of today: 52.5 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
I cannot even really believe it's September! omg. on a similar note to you, i do feel i've TOTALLY gotten off track! one of the good things - i have managed my pain better than maybe several of the summers preceeding this one.
but like you, i know i have to do more (cardio for me) training.
keep taking care of yourself.
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Sounds like a good plan. Hope you have a good day.
Aside from nearly having a stroke at work, it was a good dau indeed. I'd give it a solid B.
Horn_Of_Plenty on 09/11/2019:
if husband will still go without you, prob ok to stay at work yourself. it's good for hubby to be able to do it on his own, if he can. my opinion ;)
Very true but also, there isn't a lot that we do together. We don't have a lot of shared interests or hobbies. Chair Yoga is one of the few things we can do together.
BearCountryGG on 09/11/2019:
It's probably be a good thing for him to do some things on his own....independence is a step in the right direction for his confidence and your trusting that he can do it.
I suppose. See my response to Horn. Both of you are right, but the chair yoga is for the other reason.
If we go separately, then it satisfies both together and independence.
grannyannie on 09/11/2019:
The yoga sounds good. Nice is hubby goes with you.
It is. I love it. I wish he could go on walks, hike, do other kinds of yoga, bike ride, etc., with me. I'm so sad that these are no longer options for us to do together.