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Donkey - Friday Feb 28, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 135.5

 I know there is still today,  but I cannot believe I got through yet another incredibly difficult week.  I have a lot of deadlines today,  so it's not over yet. 

Much chaos going on outside of work too,  with mother in law deciding she needs to move out of assisted living into something more independent (even though she is both deaf and blind), daughter completely overwhelmed,  overworked,  and freaking out,  husband freaking out over all of this....  

Fast yoga last night was fun,  although I wasn't particularly very good at balancing.  Plus,  I felt it was too short,  even though it wasn't. 

Guilt will prompt me to try hard to attend Yin yoga tonight.  I had suggested a Friday evening class to the owner,  so she set one up,  but I  have had a hard time attending it.  The class starts at 6 pm and it's hard to make this time    because often on Friday,  I stay late at work to finish up things before the weekend.  I don't know that anyone else goes to this class either. The one time I made it,  I was the only one. 

Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 02/28/2020:
You are doing good, keep your head up Jdonk!

your 6pm yoga class reminds me of the library event at 6:30pm i went to last night. It was mostly all seniors in attendance, not many younger people since 6:30pm can be a challenge to go to after work. But the event was still good and i'm glad i went. i think it will be the same for you, if you go to yoga.

you motivate me with your stick-with-it attitude towards yoga!!!

legcramps on 02/28/2020:
Sounds like you're being pulled a lot of different ways lately. I hope you can attend the yoga class tonight; it will likely bring you some relief from your everyday stress.

Deep breaths.

Donkey - Tuesday Feb 25, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 135.5

So yesterday was awful,  still feeling the effects of that client who screamed at me last week.  My boss is aware but remains neutral.  I think that's how he remains calm and happy.   Maybe he's on to something there. :-)

I was so done after work that I stayed home and rode my bike.  I had  intended to do weights too but that didn't happen.  Husband and daughter went to the gym and said it was REALLY busy, so I'm kind of glad I didn't go. Maybe tonight,  if the weather cooperates. 

We were supposed to get this big snow over 3 days, starting today,  but now it looks like it will just be a  dusting overnight, so the gym might be a possibility. 

My next personal challenge is to attend yoga classes at the gym.  Although I'm not exactly a beginner, I think that's where I will start. 

Still trying to eat less and have been doing ok with that.  I've essentially cut out my afternoon snack. 

Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

innerpeace on 02/25/2020:
I can relate. I think about incidents that happen way after the fact too. It seems to affect me more than most. I That reminds me of the Officer and Gentleman scene where Sid tells Zach that he can't just sh!t on people and sleep like a baby at night. hope you have a better day.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 02/25/2020:
He may choose also to remain calm on the outside ;) bosses sometimes just know how to manage that emotional aspect better, maybe, not that i'm saying YOU can't be a boss! not at all! just saying. also he may be used to this even more than you ;)

remember that you can eat less, but "MORE" you can always substitute a different snack for a piece of fruit and tea or something, very low cal. or, one single chocolate and a drink can go far too, i find.

Donkey - Saturday Feb 22, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 135.5

 Remembered to weigh in this morning.  The weight is slowly coming back down.  I might have had a lower number but ate mindlessly at dinner and had a whole chicken breast!

I had an epiphany last week that the reason my weight is up is because I've been eating too much!  So if I want results,  I have to do the hard work,  and most of the struggle is on my plate. 

With the exception of last night's dinner,  I've been working hard to be very mindful of what I'm eating .

I plan to go to the Fancy Gym this weekend.  Had yoga Thursday and last night,  so I couldn't go. 

Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 02/22/2020:
Great progress !

The struggle is real :)

Remember when you only worked out at home ?! What an awesome change ....

It’s 3:30pm and I’m home on couch eating a snack thinking to work out at home ?! Lol gym may have to wait till next week ..

Donkey on 02/22/2020:
It's almost dinner time, and all I've done is workout at home. I'm still aiming to go to the Fancy Gym tonight, when it's less busy. Trying to work my way up to it...

Horn_Of_Plenty on 02/24/2020:
I totally agree with you, she did wrong in yelling at you :( maybe she needs anger management! :)

it's hard not to take it personally i know. i'm SURE you weren't the first to be yelled at!

Horn_Of_Plenty on 02/24/2020:
i def see that going to the gym this past weekend used more of my energy / time.

one good thing about GOING out to the gym, is you aren't distracted by everything at home!!!! my workout was a lot stronger and dedicated. and i hopped on elliptical for 20 min. as well, i made sure to use the back exercise machine and do some stretching. i was reminded to do some moves i don't do at home.

it's nice to go to gym, but, i see my arms have benefited from my home workout. the gym did help me stretch and do some cardio...

all in all, i have figured that i need to devote a little more time to strenthen / stretch my back at home and keep doing more walking as i'm able to...

once at the gym, it's a wonderful, easy environment to get things done.

Donkey - Friday Feb 21, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 136.0

 So yesterday,  a client SCREAMED at me on the phone because I wouldn't apologize for the other party's attorney's mistake.  We're the Buyer and the Seller's attorney made the mistake. 

I was so taken aback that I was physically shaking.  I developed a headache and could not see nor think clearly.  So I went home early.

I've been trying to shake this off but was completely off balance at Fast-Slow yoga last night.  I also did not sleep very well last night,  with waking up at 12:13am and unable to go back to sleep until over an hour later. 

So I'm sure you can imagine how much I do NOT want to go to work today.  But all I can hope is to reset myself mentally over the weekend. 

To help in this reset,  I am attending a yoga restorative workshop tonight,  taught by last night's instructor.   It will be a larger group of 9 or possibly 10.  I signed up for this in January,  but who knew how much I would need this now. 

Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 02/21/2020:
Sorry you were screamed at. One important thing to remember is you cannot control other people’s actions and you never know the full history behind this person who acted that way towards you!

I’m glad you have yoga to help you thru this :)

Donkey on 02/22/2020:
I appreciate your comment, but whatever that client is going through, that is no excuse for her verbally assaulting me like that.

After the call, my legs were shaking uncontrollably. I had problems with my eyes focusing, and I had a shooting headache. I felt sore all over and was very out of balance at yoga.

The next morning I woke up feeling sore all over as if I had been physically hit.

Donkey - Sunday Feb 16, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 136.0

 I wanted to clarify that I don't write here for comments,  per se, unless of course,  I specifically ask for feedback,  reality check, opinions,  etc.  Please don't think that my comment yesterday about weekend posting was attention seeking.  I love reading feedback on my diary,  and I love to read about what you're doing too.  It's just harder for me to comment in other diaries during the week, which makes me feel somewhat disconnected from the group here. 

I wanted to mention that what helped me get through this week,  emotionally,  was to think of at least one thing I could look forward to after work, whether it was a warm dinner,  a small piece of chocolate,  a tv show,  a yoga session...   Now I can add treats to be had at the Fancy Gym, such as hot tub, sauna, etc.  This really helped me get through days that would otherwise seem grim and depressing. 

I made it to the Fancy Gym last night!  That is a great time to go!  Not crowded at all.  The only thing was that I couldn't partake in some of the water things (hot tub, e.g.) because husband didn't pack a bag.  He's not sure he has swim trunks that fit him.  So he will try on the 2 pairs we have today.  And today,  my daughter is coming along,  and she will want to do the hot tub and sauna.

I stuck to familiar cardio machines last night.   30 minutes on the elliptical and 10 minutes rowing.  I do free weights at home,  right now,  but I will eventually gravitate to the eight machines at the FG (Fancy Gym).  And of course they are supposed to have *amazing* yoga classes there!

Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 02/16/2020:
I do admit to felt less connected this week because hardly anyone was posting lol ;)

Anyways, I’m proud of you for making it to the FG. I do miss my gym days - perhaps I’ll go back at a different point in the future when it works out better with my commute :-)

bearcountrygg on 02/16/2020:
It's necessary for all of us to have some fun...whatever that may be for each of us......I picked up some spa type face masks a while back and had been forgetting about them......during a quiet time the other day...i put one on...laid down...and read for the 30 minutes that it said to leave it on...and it was wonderful...i don't know if it actually did anything for my skin....but it was a nice pampering 30 minutes.

bearcountrygg on 02/16/2020:
That would be a fun thing for you and your daughter to do together!

legcramps on 02/18/2020:
It really sounds like Fancy Gym is a pretty great place. It's nice to find a new challenge from time to time as well; maybe FG will help you in your yoga practice, or maybe it will open up another different and exciting challenge for you! A gym with a hot tub and sauna would be so amazing! Enjoy it!

Donkey - Saturday Feb 15, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 136.0

I'm not writing as much.  During the week,  I have no time.   During the weekend,  no one comments. 

It's been a very difficult week, both at work and personally, so I didn't eat as much.  I've also made small changes to my exercising to make it a little more challenging.   Working out is now a priority in my life, every day. 

I'm hoping to have the time  and courage to go to the Fancy Gym for a first- time workout.   It would be just me and Mr. Donkey, since the daughter has to work. 

Progress as of today: 50.5 lbs lost so far, only 9 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 02/15/2020:
I've found the slow weekend presence here in the past too.......people get busy and I just tried to keep moving along anyway....sometimes posters catch up...and sometimes not.....but It all helped me clarify things for myself...even if I was the only one posting....writing things out just causes so many aha moments for me. I also have shifted gears.....and your boost in exercise time sounds like a sound plan. I hope next week gets better for you. Don't forget to do things that make you happy!!!

horn_of_plenty on 02/15/2020:
I’m happy to hear you are prioritizing exercise. That is one thing I am continuously trying to make more of a priority again. I’m taking a class now and even though I’m not the one teaching it, it left me mentally drained enough to not be productive the rest of the day.

Anyways, I’m sorry also that I don’t comment as much during the week as at work I do go online and find it simpler to catch up with everyone during the week ;)

horn_of_plenty on 02/15/2020:
Thank you for your comments today :) let us know if you make it to the fancy gym!

Donkey - Sunday Feb 09, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 138.0

I am not afraid of change....  Today I will be open to whatever opportunities the day offers...  I am  not afraid of change... 

Progress as of today: 48.5 lbs lost so far, only 11 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 02/09/2020:
We are always here to listen :) and offer some opinions ;) haha

Horn_Of_Plenty on 02/12/2020:
How are you, Mrs. Donk?!

innerpeace on 02/13/2020:
Hope you are OK.

Donkey - Saturday Feb 08, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 138.0

Remembered to weigh in this morning,  no change in weight.   Discouraged.  

The family joined a Fancy Gym, because, long story short,  it was cheaper for all of us to join than just my daughter.  The problem is that I seldom go that direction any more because the traffic is so bad.

In fact, Husband and I were supposed to go there last night,  but I wouldn't drive through the construction that was between where we were and where the Gym is.  (These rigid rules I have are a symptom of unresolved PTSD.)

So maybe I'll get my membership activated over the weekend.  I would be totally against this gym, except that the word around town is that they have great yoga classes.  But what good is that if I never go?  DUH

The boss comes back from vacation this week.  I hope he comes back ready to work.  That's doubtful, but maybe I'm wrong.  My husband suggested I give him some time to adjust, and I will.  I've changed my approach to my workload too,  so I hope the boss can adjust to me,  as I will with him. 

Depending on how the boss picks up (or not) upon his return may help me make decisions about how much longer I work at this job. 

I'm considering making a total career change,  if I make a move. 

Progress as of today: 48.5 lbs lost so far, only 11 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 02/09/2020:
What is the career change you are considering?

Also, that's wonderful the whole family joined the gym! awesome!!! I hope you make it there, soon. that would be awesome to take (free)? yoga classes once you are a gym member?

Donkey - Monday Feb 03, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 138.0

I went to the doctor's this morning for a physical.  Last year,  I weighed 132. This year I weighed 142... I guess.  

So she turned to me and says, "You've gained 10 pounds over the year.  Why do you think this happened?"

Nothing like a kick in the head when you're down...

Progress as of today: 48.5 lbs lost so far, only 11 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 02/04/2020:
That sure was rude.......in the whole scheme of things 10 pounds is nothing....in fact back in the day..WW wouldn't even let someone join if they only needed to lose 10.....i remember when my 83 year old Dad went to the dr and the dr told him to lose 7 pounds.......Sounds to me like that was the only thing she could pick on you for.....sad.

innerpeace on 02/04/2020:
That in itself is why I don't go.

legcramps on 02/04/2020:
Don't let it bother you...health professionals do not always have the best bedside manner - they are very matter-of-fact due to the nature of their work. Let them tick their boxes and you go on living your best life - which doesn't have to be one that is weighed and measured.

Horn_Of_Plenty on 02/04/2020:
i was reading a book about it just being a scheme that gaining weight leads to physical problems / health issues if you are within normal weight category. i was reading that book - written by a "fat" girl. i forget the name of it right now.

i do think the drs statement was sorta dumb in that it's an obvious answer!

you may have more muscle now. it could be due to many things. but don't let the office visit throw you for a total loop. remember to be creative with your meals and eating.

Maria7 on 02/05/2020:
Sometimes being a little heavier than we would like to be can be beneficial...as in a healthier immune system is what I think.

happy-1 on 02/06/2020:
Tell her it's because she's slacking off and needs to do every test and scan your insurance will pay for and give you a list and a referral for the ones that they won't.

Donkey - Sunday Feb 02, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 138.0

 So after I posted yesterday morning, I had a breakdown and cried for about an hour.  Then, I sank into a depression for the rest of the day.  I still managed to drop off recycling and take husband to the library.

I did yoga at home last night.  It helped a little.

Progress as of today: 48.5 lbs lost so far, only 11 lbs to go!

Duaa123. on 02/03/2020:
Yoga is nice for reliving ourselves , nice activity try to do it at nature

bearcountrygg on 02/03/2020:
Hoping that you are feeling better now....

Horn_Of_Plenty on 02/03/2020:
I'm glad the yoga helped. what's wrong? is something in particular bothering you?

legcramps on 02/03/2020:
I hope you are doing better today. Hugs.

Maria7 on 02/03/2020:
Hoping you are feeling better today. Just realize you are surely not alone in your struggles and know that we all care about you a lot.

happy-1 on 02/07/2020:

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