Something just isn't right, on an emotional level, I think.... might be physical and I'm just not picking up on it.
I have been carrying around the work thing with me, even though I've managed to put it in a place where it's not dominating every waking moment. I'm not thinking about it, but rather dreading having to deal with this on Monday. I really wish I could afford to retire.
I did not post again yesterday, but it turned out to be a pretty good day. I stayed busy, anyway. Got a nice long walk in with my daughter. Tried a new upper body dumbbell routine. I'm going to try this for a week or two, to mix things up. I did indulge with a little too much ice cream after dinner, but now it's gone so I won't have to think about it any more. All 3 of us worked on the gutter problem we've been having. Hopefully that fixed the problem. It was gross.
I had a hard time getting out of bed this morning. Let's just say I did not wake up to joy, that's for sure. Part of the problem is that I stayed up too late reading. Finally DID get up, though, to find that this morning is a beautiful day. I guess the forecasted 80% chance of rain is coming this afternoon.... The sky has turned from sunny to bright but cloudy, so I'm going to log off here now and get ready for an outdoor walk.
Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!
So something happened at work on Friday afternoon that is weighing heavily on my mind... I'm writing about it here, in hopes that I can "leave" it here and move on with my weekend. I do NOT want this to affect my ability to relax and recharge. Things like this tend to weigh heavily on my mind and ruin the present moment.
I actually did sorta a keto recipe but not really with the cool whip mixed with peanut butter it's almost too easy to be called a keto dessert or recipe. i want a donut or cake keto recipe. just gotta find the time i want to spend on it. lately, i'm more about cooking food :) like veggies and meat!
don't worry about the glitch, just LEARN from it. that's all you can do. stay positive. and if boss brings it up, show him how you're working on prevention for the next time :)
Thank you, Friday!!! Could not get here soon enough!!!
Cat yoga was good! I would go again. My daughter's work schedule changed unexpectedly and I invited her to come along if there were openings, but the event had already sold out. In a way, I was glad because I felt that this was something I wanted to do alone. That is to say, this was HUGE in stepping out of my comfort zone, and that was the challenge to myself: to do something new on my own. I need to be able to do this, because my husband cannot do a lot of the things I want to do, and my daughter has her own life to live. Does that make sense? Now that I've done it, I'd be happy to have her come with me next time.
The yoga itself was more exercise and less relaxation than the Chair Yoga my husband and I do once a month. The instructor was not as soothing, but more invigorating. So it was different. I can see how some forms of yoga can be quite a workout!
Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!
Yes, i see that you wanted to do it independently, all alone, without help (your daughter accompanying you)...i get you completely, yes.
yes, yoga can def be a big workout depending on the type / instructor / other variables.
Let's say that this yoga was more of an "awakening" feeling, where as the chair yoga I go to is more of a "resting" feeling. Both are great, but just different.
i'm in a touchy place right now. Last night, after my workout (light weights, high reps, upper body), I did not have anything to eat. In fact, I skipped out on the nuts and piece of dark chocolate after dinner as well. This morning I woke up feeling fatigued. I almost considered sleeping in or going into work an hour late so that I could get more sleep and then exercise later. I don't know if it was the food or if I'm overtraining. I'm also not sleeping well. My husband has been coming to bed late and waking me up. (I'm sensitive like that.) Last night, I couldn't get back to sleep because my back ached.
So I'm tired!
I'm also stressed out about this cat yoga tomorrow night. I talked to Male Co-Worker about this yesterday, because he has an event tomorrow night, too, that he is equally looking forward to yet dreading. He knows exactly what I'm talking about. It's not laziness, but rather stepping out of one's comfort zone. It would be so much easier not to go, just to go home and do the familiar, even though this is something I'm really looking forward too. It was nice to know that I'm not the only one with these kinds of feelngs. I know I'll go, because I paid for this.
I *AM* having second thoughts about the free "Catholic yoga" next week though. I don't want to miss the Presidential debate, and I would probably miss the first 15 minutes of it. As a voting citizen, I feel it my civic duty to be as informed as possible about any and all candidates for the next election. And as I've written before, I have mixed feelings about the whole "Catholic yoga" thing --- can't call it "yoga" because yoga in itself is related to another religion - oh give me a break. So you can't be yoga but you can plagarize all of the movements and stretches. Got it. (NOT)
I'm way out of my comfort zone this week and it's making me very anxious. On the bright side, I'm not eating my emotions. That's a really good thing!
Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!
You can do this CAT yoga! You LOVE CATS! I think that you are emotionally putting too much emphasis on it being something new. This is good for you!
Also, you can YOU TUBE the presidential debate! you won't miss any...right?
Then again, you can say no to anything you don't want to do. Just prepare for these new things.make sure you have your workout clothes ready...and everything ready. maybe a snack ready if you need it...
I am rooting for you.
I'm up early today, because there is a 9am closing at the office this morning, and I want to be there early so as to help folks get set up. Perhaps I can leave early or take a longer lunch.
I was not busy at work yesterday but still stayed until 5:40p because at 4:45p, the emails started coming in! Really unfair. The lack of work was causing me quite a bit of anxiety, to the point of being physically uncomfortable.
Because Thursday is cat yoga, tonight should be upper body light weights and tomorrow would be legs.
I find myself grabbing a handful of nuts after dinner. Nuts seem to calm me down, but this is probably an additional 200 calories that maybe I could skip.
This is not a good post. I'm feeling very anxious right now, so my thoughts are all over the place...
Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!
I like to see your schedule of your workouts and plans involving the cat yoga. it's def the only way to get things done is by having this schedule.
i have actually noticed my own weekends are not scheduled enough - like last weekend. i hope to never schedule a workout again (or at least for a very long time) the same night as a family function! :)
the good thing is it's a handful of nuts and healthy. let it be.
and today you keep being true to yourself and everyone else - because you ALWAYS are.
oh, maybe take some more time to think about your thoughts here. come back later and regroup?
wishing you a fast, productive day <3
i took a picture of a page of a book i'm reading that made me think of YOU! actually many parts of the book have me thinking of you. especially with the cat yoga - a new activity to spice things up and put a stop to things being monotonous. workouts also - changing them every so often so you keep momentum. these are good things.
I have so many mixed emotions about the yoga events this week and next. I'm looking forward to it BUT at the same time, dreading it.
Dumbbells Lady on Facebook never got back to me with an address to pick up the 20lbs weights, so I'm done with that.
Felt some ache in my lower body from yesterday's workout. So I'm pleased with that.
Dealing with some serious sugar cravings, trying to resist and work past them. Had some ice cream Friday night, which I believe has set these cravings afire.
Trying to start the week on a positive note, but already feeling the workweek dread. Cat Yoga on Thursday, though...
Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!
always nice to have a little ache telling you that you did some work!
totally hear you on cravings. this happens to me too after an indulgence, i just want to have more, always.
CAT YOGA. you gotta let us know how this goes!
i also am trying for positive :) i am going to cook tonight and try to get it all done not too late :) would be nice to eat my home cooked food tomorrow for lunch! i have SO MANY VEGGIES to make! and a GREAT recipe!
you sound more positive...how's your son!
Happy Father's Day.... Mr. Donkey was going to grill outside today with his brand new grill but since the weather's been kind of wet and rainy, now he's not so enthusiastic. I hope he changes his mind. This reminds me that he did not buy any corn on the cob to cook on the grill for our daughter, so maybe he was never intending to cookout today. Hmmm....
I am waiting for the lady selling her dumbbells on Facebook to contact me for a time and place for pick-up. Let's see if this one ever comes to fruition. I'm starting to think that rather than buying heavier weights, to invest my money in some resistance bands. They are a lot cheaper and take up way less space. I think if Dumbbells Lady doesn't come through today, I'm not going to pursue them any further. Today or that's it.
I realized this morning that when I worked out with weights yesterday, I did a full upper body routine. So today, I will do legs and more ab work - if my back will permit it. I woke up to a really sore hip/back (as usual). My morning bike ride seems to have helped immensely with that. I will also do some floor stretches here in a little bit to realign my hips to my back. *sigh* gettin' old...
I've also noticed that I'm getting tired of meat. This past week, I was to the point where I cannot eat any more bacon for a while. I wasn't eating a lot of it, but while eating it, realized, I've had enough, I don't want any more. I have some summer sausage in the refrigerator that I've also "had enough" of. I'm not sure if it's the high fat or the flavor or what.
Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!
Did you guys bbq? I took home steak for R but he told me he cannot chew it so i now will freeze it in the corned beef extra liquid i have...
Those dumbbells are a GREAT price! what a great idea. i should have looked into more options when i was purchasing mine! did you end up picking them up?
also exercise bands, using them slow and with resistance, i know can be just as effective as weights. so that would be a great option too of course!
I am reading something interesting, my book on success that i forgot at my parents' house boohooo...and well your routine on your bike is really nice bc you are moving and doing something very positive at the start of your day.
Did not weigh in today and that's fine. I did think about weighing in and then decided that now was not a good time.
Friday was a better day for me at work. Nice Lady is starting to talk to me again. I decided that I cannot live my life trying to manage the feelings of other people. If she is mad at me, then that's on her, and how she chooses to act or react is her decision. By the way -- I caught her AGAIN, yesterday, trying to work on one of my files. Do I do that to her files? No. I didn't call her out on it, but just kind of finished the task she started. I complained to my husband that said I need to find another job, because this is driving me nuts.
Overall though, it was a good day though - and this is bad - because we're not so busy. That's not good because I should still be busy until the end of June. Then real estate slows down a little for the 4th of July week, picks up again until the beginning of August when people start thinking about going back to school. So that there is a lull NOW is not a good sign. But I don't care, because I realize that I have to look out for my OWN well-being, and being less stressed out is what is important to me, personally. In fact, I started thinking yesterday afternoon about taking shorter hours when the work is less, rather than trying to find things to do, to work a full 8 hours. On the other hand, I did put in 3.75 hours of overtime this week overall....
I would like to get flowers for all of my flower pots today. I do not know if I will do that. I also have to get to the bank today as well. Heavy weights for shoulders/chest/triceps today. Already not looking forward to it, but I have a TV show at noon to watch, so that's some incentive there.
My husband sprang a couple of surprises on me today: wants to go grocery shopping (no thanks) and the hardware store (no thanks). Plus we're having a "money talk" sometime today, while my daughter is at work because these talks can get kind of loud.
I hope to update this post later on today...
EVENING UPDATE: If you read my comments to Horn below, you will see that I ended up running errands with Mr. Donkey. It was a good time. It had started to rain, and I think he (and me) got afraid that he might slip and fall again. That changed his mind from "I'll do it myself" to "OK, let's go when you're ready."
I bought some impatience flowers for my flower pots. I'm hoping that it will stop raining long enough for me to be able to pot them tomorrow.
Did heavy weights but different exercises.Afterwards, I really felt it - in a good way. I don't feel any pain now. Also, to my daily push-ups, I'm adding sit-ups in some form. We were all talking about this at work, and I think working on my front (abs) will help with my back. I realize that I don't do nearly enough to improve my posture. I'm starting to think about spinal disc compression or degration as we get older. Trying to avoid that.
Oh and some good news -- an inquiry I put in on FB Marketplace for 20lb dumbbells finally answered me this evening. I hope to pick them up tomorrow. 40lbs total for only $10!
Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!
Add to this mix that a lot of my boss' top producing realtors have either retired or are retiring out of state, seriously sick (cancer), or have died. My boss will be 69 this year in October, and he has not done too much to gather young realtors into using our office.
Maybe go with the flow the rest of June at work until it seems busier? Is this a good thing if work is steady but not necessarily busy?
I hope you get some of your to-do list activities if not all of them accomplished today! Let us know what you did!
I think your hubby tends to surprise you a LOT with things he wants to do. Perhaps you can tell him you'd like to plan it in advance with him - bc there's some things you also want to do? I think it's alright for you not to accept everything he's asking to do bc he's got to give you some notice or discuss as a team? no? that's my opinion anyways!
Also, with my husband, I tried to turn it around, so that rather than thinking he's being so rude by not taking my time into consideration, that perhaps he wants something to do together. I told him after my TV show (and weight training!!!) ends at 1:30p, I would be happy to go with him wherever. At first he resisted but when it started to rain, he changed his mind. We had a fun time.
Amen, it's Friday!!!
Stuck to my plan and did light weights yesterday. Want feeling particularly motivated, so I had to dig deep.
Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!
AMEN IT'S FRIDAY!
do you have a nice plan on the weekend?
Yesterday ended up being a better day, I think, because I was able to leave work at 5p and because my daughter was home for dinner.
My husband fell yesterday, going to the doctor's office to get his blood tested. It was raining, his cane slipped on a wet surface, and down he went. Thank goodness Daughter was with him, but she needed help from a man passing by to lift my heavy husband up on his feet. He landed on his elbow. I'm waiting to see how he feels today.
So it was a quiet evening last night. Daughter had a staff meeting at work at 7p, so I did my bike and legs workout. Happy with that. Tonight is light weights. Got some good shows to watch while I do this. I love working out with the lighter weights, high reps .
I'm finding myself more and more resentful of work taking up my time. Rather than feeling like I'm helping make people's real estate dreams come true, I feel like I'm walking into a boxing ring or firing range, and each day has become a battle to survive. That's not the right mind-set!
Progress as of today: 51 lbs lost so far, only -1 lbs to go!
I'm sorry you're feeling resentful of work right now; I hope this is just a passing phase for you and that things will get better soon. If not, it's never too late for change...
My husband is doing much better today. He/We dodged a bullet on this one!
Trust me, at my job there's politics and all kinds of nutty things going on, especially as of late.
Try to change your mindset - write a list at the end of the day for yourself of 3 positive things that happened at work - try something to see the other side of the coin.
I'm really sorry to hear about your husband and i do hope he will be OK. i'm glad there was help nearby when he fell. now he will have to be much more careful going forward.
it's good that you know what kind of weights workouts you like to do. when you enjoy your workout, that's a wonderful thing that helps you keep your momentum.
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Are you getting enough B vitamins???? They are the happy vits.......also if you are still doing keto.....it's hard on the moods......If you really need to just retire.....downsizing may be what needs to be done......is that a possibility? Maybe you would be happier in a different line of work? Pretty much all jobs have times of stress...I've never had one that didn't.....but some jobs are just easier to leave and forget for the day.
You might have something there about the vitamins. I take a multivitamin but that might not be enough.
You're 100% spot on about stress at any job. My job is hard for me to leave at work. In fact, I texted the Associate attorney that he has a 9a closing tomorrow that will require travel time, just as a friendly reminder. Ugh...
happy-1 on 06/23/2019:
Hugs. Disrupted sleep is also hard on the moods. As is overtraining.
Yep -- overtraining. Hasn't thought of that, but I think you're right. Pulling back this week.
Thank you for pointing that out. Extremely helpful!
Horn_Of_Plenty on 06/24/2019:
with the work thing, you cannot change the past. but you can just be positive (as you were about solutions about the work thing) going forward. try to think of it as "LINDA my coworker" would do .... she'd want to move past it, fit it, and move on! (i do understand you though, completely!)
Your Saturday sounds eventful and productive, nicely done!
My morning was like yours, but i did sleep enough. just on the weekend, i got used to MORE sleep! lol, seems i should DEF keep on getting extra sleep as it does feel good when i can!
Sometimes you need more sleep than you think you do (my opinion!)
We've been having a lot of rain in the past 2 weeks also - but weekend was nice.
maybe the rain will stop so you can walk at lunch.
wishing you continued success and positivity. you are needed at your job, you do good work, i can tell. push forward with it, don't let a mistake bog your future work!
Tried to go in wth a lighter heart. Not sure that worked the whole day, but I left in a better place mentally.
legcramps on 06/24/2019:
I hope your workday goes well today; i've been carrying around unnecessary work stress lately as well. I think we both need to figure out how to deal with this 'abusive relationship' we call work.
I almost quit yesterday, but held my tongue. Your insightful comment is keen. I think you're right, this is abusive, so now I have to figure out how much of that I allow to happen, and how much abuse is actually there.