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Donkey - Friday Sep 18, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 141.5

 Yesterday was a much better day.  Thank goodness.  I seriously need a good weekend. 

The New Attorney starts today, and I must remember to stay focused at my job,  on my tasks,  and not get caught up in any drama that may pop up. 

Will I get to the point where I can return to my yoga practice?  That seems so long ago. 

Progress as of today: 45 lbs lost so far, only 6.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 09/18/2020:
Glad to hear that it got better.....Hopefully you can get back to yoga.....

grannyannie on 09/18/2020:
Glad day was better. Hope you can get back to yoga.

Maria7 on 09/18/2020:
Hope you have a happy day.

legcramps on 09/18/2020:
I hope your weekend consists of everything you need to rejuvenate!

Donkey - Thursday Sep 17, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 141.5

Very quick, as I seem to have run out of time, even though I got up early.  There is always something that has to get done, and it gets done before I log on here, apparently. 

Yesterday was a very bad day at work.  It seems as though yesterday was the day for unhappy clients and agents. I'm trying to shake off the negative feeling, and just want to look forward to doing the best I can to be positive.  This can be really, really hard for me to do.  

Also, still no relief from the workload, and today and tomorrow promise to be VERY busy.  

This job just sucks all the life out of living.

Progress as of today: 45 lbs lost so far, only 6.5 lbs to go!

grannyannie on 09/17/2020:
Sorry you day was so bad. Are you thinking about looking for a different one? Or not a option. I've had jobs where I hated to get up every morning.

bearcountrygg on 09/17/2020:
Hope today turns out better.

Maria7 on 09/17/2020:
Time to change to something different, maybe? To where you can keep your joy while doing it. Hope your day gets better. Take care.

Horn_of_plenty on 09/17/2020:
Take a breath, Donkey!

I was reading today about applying and being a paralegal. and one thing i read was that you have to be able to "advocate" for yourself and not be "weak!" something like that..i reworded it a little using the word "weak."

anyways, my point is that this just goes to show that you are very talented and a hard working person! Like we didn't know that already!?

seems that you chose the right profession...because you do handle it quite well. hold your head high.

Donkey - Tuesday Sep 15, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 141.5

So, it's Tuesday evening, and I'm on the laptop (not my phone) as I wait to see if Daughter wants to go to the gym tonight or not.  Either way is fine by me.  If she does, great - I'll do the elliptical.  If she doesn't, great - I'll do a short bike ride and then legs & biceps at home. 

I'm trying to figure out why I was able to leave at a decent hour today, even though I was still really busy.  I realize that it's because today was not a day with a bunch of deadlines.  On Deadline Days, that's when I become really crunched for time, and when a lot of files have their deadlines all on the same day, then it's insane.  Also, when I'm not feeling good, the job becomes so much harder for me.  It's hard for me to disguise my discomfort.  

I've been having a few sips (OK, gulps) of protein shakes after I workout, and I think that's been helping a lot with food fits, recovery, and muscle fatigue.  A shake is 160 calories, and I usually have about 1/3 of a shake, after each workout.  That's not too bad with calories.  I'm going to keep trying that.

OK... let's see what the Daughter has decided to do tonight.

Progress as of today: 45 lbs lost so far, only 6.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 09/15/2020:
I think protein drinks cover so many bases as far as nutrition goes...yet disguise themselves as a dessert.....and a liquid that cures thirst......amazing things...and they double as a coffee creamer too......They probably don't get enough credit!

grannyannie on 09/16/2020:
Glad work was less stressful.

Horn_of_plenty on 09/16/2020:
I agree with BCGG...i think there's a lot of good to the shakes. :)

My dad likes the shakes and has a little also before his workouts ;)

Donkey - Monday Sep 14, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 141.5

 It took a lot of convincing to get out of bed this morning.  I finally told myself that my bike ride will be fun.  It did get me up. 

I did make it to the gym yesterday,  but it was not a comfortable experience,  and I could not wait to leave.  

I did well with eating.  Did weights last night - chest and triceps. So if I'm up to it,  I can do back and biceps,  or legs and shoulders tonight.  I do want to be more consistent with weight training.  THAT would have been a good September goal to have. 

Lately,  there's not enough energy left for me,  at the end of the workday,  for ME.  I feel slightly robbed of my weekend, being handicapped by TOM on Saturday.  I think that's the real issue. 

Progress as of today: 45 lbs lost so far, only 6.5 lbs to go!

Maria7 on 09/14/2020:
I hope you have a better weekend coming up and that you enjoyed your bike ride this morning. It helps to have something to do to tell ourselves that things will be better if we do them. For me this morning, it was cleaning out a small closet. Have a good day.

Donkey on 09/15/2020:
This is true! I think that's why my walks are so important to me. Also, that extra pampering in the shower I did a couple of nights ago was so nice. I'm going to keep exploring other nice, little things I can do for myself.

bearcountrygg on 09/14/2020:
Sounds like you need a day to just sit down and do nothing Donkey....you are under a lot of pressure at work....Take a ME DAY......just relax ...you deserve it...you have been working so hard.

Donkey on 09/15/2020:
I think you're right! Last year I did just this. Husband and I went away for a weekend, and on that Saturday, we did nothing but put together a puzzle and watch a movie. That was nice :-)

grannyannie on 09/14/2020:
Good job on exercise and eating! I'm anxious to get back to muscle work!

Donkey on 09/15/2020:
Thank you! I'm getting the itching to do weights again. I think every other day works nicely, with a daily bike ride, mostly to stretch out my back muscles.

Horn_of_plenty on 09/14/2020:
i'm glad TOM will be a distant memory for you by the end of this week!

i know what you mean totally, once again!

also, i hope the week improves as you go forward.

i like how you went about getting yourself out of bed! Tomorrow, i also have a goal to be active in the morning, before starting my reading which will prob take all day!

Donkey on 09/15/2020:
Today (Tuesday) was SO much better than Monday. Wow, Monday was just not a good day. I was telling Mistakes Girl, that if I continue to have more TOM's like this month, that I'm going to have to consult with my doctor on options.

Donkey - Sunday Sep 13, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 141.5

    I remembered to weigh-in this morning, and I am quite pleased to see the numbers going in the right direction.  Look at how close I am to getting back into the 130's.  I MUST remember this struggle, so that once I am IN the 130's, that I do everything in my power to STAY in the 130's.  I MUST REMEMBER THIS.

    One thing that I've been improving on is drinking water.  I confess that about 2-3 weeks ago, I was at the point that I could not drink any water unless it was artificially flavored with those flavor packets with sweeteners.  It was to the point that it was excessive.  I do not like the way our tap water here tastes.  They've increased the chlorine levels and it's yucky.  So I pulled out an old water bottle that has a Brita filter attached to it.  I'm also brewing herbal teas, and then diluting and chilling them into 32 oz cups.  I also use frozen fruit to chill the tap water.  The juice from the fruit makes the water drinkable, without adding anything artificial.

This has worked well for me, and I have done well.  I am drinking just short of a gallon of water a day.

     Finally after a week of grey and rain, the sun is out!  Oh what a difference this is making on my mood.  I feel much more positive and productive today.  Even if I don't have that much to do - which I don't, really.  I may not even get the curtains resolved, but that's OK.  TOM is still being a nuisance; I'll make do.

I did not make it to the gym yesterday.  Son called in the afternoon, so my window of time to go to the gym and make it back in time for daughter's dinner evaporated.  That's quite OK, because it was really nice to speak with my son.  He will not be able to come out for a visit over (American) Thanksgiving nor Christmas.  This will be the first time that we haven't had him around for the holiday.  Last year, he was able to come home for Christmas.

After dinner, I thought about going to the gym at night, but I was stil not feeling well from TOM, so I decided to go for a walk instead.  Oh my goodness!  It was a good thing I did not go to the gym, because this walk - a route that I take quite often with no difficulty - nearly kicked my butt.  I gave thought, TWICE, to calling my husband to have him come pick me up in the car.  The level of fatigue was encumbering.  I felt like my thighs were full of cement.

I made it home, and decided to get ready for bed, even though it was only 7:30p.  Just because I say that, though, doesn't mean that I'm going to sleep right then and there.  I have my evening routine of showering, charing my Fitbit (which means I can't go to sleep until it's fully charged), charging my phone, clearning cat boxes to avoid any overnight protests, etc.  Then I decided, since I was feeling poorly, that I would give myself a little more TLC, with a good exfoliating scrub in the shower, and then moisturizing afterwards.  It was closer to 9:30p by the time I turned off the light and fell asleep.

I slept in until 6:30a, and now I feel much better, although TOM is still being a nuisance. 

     I hope to go to the gym today.  I would like to do weights today, as I did not do them yesterday.  I don't have much else planned for the day, other than to fold and put away laundry.  I'm completely OK with that.

Progress as of today: 45 lbs lost so far, only 6.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 09/13/2020:
Your walk sounds scary...I remember phone call from D ( when I was 4 hours away)....he had gone for a long walk up here and hadn't realized that it was a slight decline...when he turned around to come home...he noticed that he was walking up hill...he didn't think he would make it either...he did...and I wasn't any help being so far away.....scary. Hope to got to the gym today!

bearcountrygg on 09/13/2020:
ALSO...Congrats for breaking that barrier....so close....YAY....a whole new breakthrough coming up quick!!!

Horn_of_plenty on 09/13/2020:
great ways to drink more water...and if you produce that you eat has lots of water, that's a plus too. my water consumption is sometimes really low when i am home (but not too low!). i drink a lot of seltzer, flavored lightly no cal stuff, and sweeten with stevia. your ideas are very good and i like them TONS! the frozen fruit is great :)

i have felt that kinda way on walks too. lately, i have even turned around once! but it was after a bike ride so the walk was...optional!?

yeah, sometimes you just gotta rest. One thing i have done lots on this "big break" from work is sleep much more....somehow i got a stye in my eye though! arg! i always manage these...speaking of your teas, i should make one and use the tea bag on my eye!

anyways you sound good...rest as you need to. then do the workouts!

Donkey - Saturday Sep 12, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

For being a day off, it has already been a difficult morning.  TOM is especially painful this month, but today should be the worst day. The wordt part is that this hampers my ability to accomplish what I want to get done today.  Also, there was a problem with one of the litter boxes, and now my husband wants to get rid of all of the cats.  I know he's just upset,and some of that is from his OWN pain that he has for his disease.  He is out of the house now, running an errand, and as soon as I am done here, I will get to cleaning the floors.

Also, long story short, I bought new curtains for 2 rooms - dining room and daughter's bedroom - and I am looking forward to getting those up today! 

Because of the morning pain, and because I thought I was in a time crunch to go with husband this morning on his errand, I forgot to weigh in.  i was fully dressed by the time I remembered that today was weigh-in day.  So I will try to weigh in tomorrow, but if it doesn't happen, then so be it.

It is another rainy day, with moderate temperatures.  I know that the rain makes husband's pain all that much worse.  He's had a very bad week with physical pain.  He's actually been handling it quite well.  You might not realize it, if he didn't mention it.

I was able to catch up at work on Friday - completely!  I can tell by the calendar that I will still be extremely busy next week, as the number of tasks I have to do for pretty much each day does not even fit on the calendar.  As long as the number of tasks remains high, I will be busy. If we get less contracts over the weekend, that will help.  A LOT.

(Text removed)

LATE MORNING EDIT:  It seems as though I purchased only 1 panel of curtains for the dining room, so that project will have to wait, and that's really bothering me.  So I may go bac to the store this evening to purchase another panel.  This should not be bothering me like it is, so I either need to let it go, or go back to the store to get a 2nd panel.

I still have yet to do Daughter's curtains.

In the meantime, I compressed the remaining boxes for recycling (yay!) and I will complete putting away the window fans for the year, since I think cooler temperatures are here to stay.

These 2 projects are major, so I should not be so upset that I am unable to complete the dining room curtain project. 


I hope to make it to the gym today.

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 09/12/2020:
When you don't feel good it seems like nothing goes right...((HUGS))Hope you can get to the gym!

Donkey on 09/12/2020:
The TOM cramps are vicious. I'm waiting for my next dose of pain killers to kick in.

happy-1 on 09/12/2020:
HUGS!!! Why doesn't anyone ever turn to mom in any of your posts and say, "Honey/Mom... you do everything around here. Let me make you a cup of coffee and you go sit down?"

Donkey on 09/12/2020:
LOL! Well... maybe once in a while that does happen, I think. My husband did tell me not to go on his errand this morning, but I think that was so he didn't have to deal with me. And he did make eggs for himself and ask if I wanted any. That was quite thoughtful of him, actually.

grannyannie on 09/12/2020:
Hard to do anything when you don't feel well.

Donkey on 09/13/2020:
Yes, this was me yesterday. I didn't realize how bad this was, until I woke up this morning (Sunday) feeling a little better.

bearcountrygg on 09/12/2020:

bearcountrygg on 09/12/2020:
Happy....wives and Moms are just thrilled when everyone gets their laundry in the hamper, their kleenex's in the wastebasket and puts the jar of mayo back in the fridge when they are done with it. Having someone tell us to go sit down while they make us a cup of coffee is usually reserved for our first day home from the hospital after major surgery...LOL

Donkey on 09/13/2020:
This is VERY true!

Horn_of_plenty on 09/12/2020:
i am soo soo soo happy to hear that yesterday on Friday you were able to leave at a reasonable time and that you both caught up with your work (you and boss!) cheers to that!

maybe show us the new curtains? I am always interested in seeing how people choose to decorate their homes!

it must be so frustrating for hubby to have pain. and i can TOTALLY relate to your pain bc i get the type that wakes me up at night during that time of the month (not every month, but sometimes!)

well...the good thing about being busy at work is it does make the day go by fast but it can be a struggle to always be "on" and not have a slow day, i know!

sometimes i like a "distraction" project or those projects that are more fun or just rarely ever happen...like when i sold the bike this week for my cousin - i liked doing it because it's something i don't usually do!...but i should have just been doing my other work! LOL

Donkey on 09/13/2020:
I found that if I go on to Walmart.com, I can find the "blackout" drapes in a pink color, for Daughter's room. So it just depends on if she wants the darkening curtains I bought her Friday, or if she feels that she truly wants her room to be dark in the mornings. The side of the house that her room is on gets the morning sun quite brightly.

I *knew* that if I could just get past the mental discomfort of having this unresolved, that it would work itself out for a reason. And it did. It was just very hard to put this aside in my own brain.

Donkey - Friday Sep 11, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

 The boss is back at work today,  and he has a TON of work to do.  If he thought he was going to get away and come back to all of his work being taken care of,  then he is sorely mistaken.  There is just too much.  Associate Attorney just couldn't keep up.   (Of  course,  some of that has to do with poor time management skills. )

Doing well with water.  Did well with food yesterday.  Just not enough time. 

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

innerpeace on 09/11/2020:
When I was in the military...a big project, inspection was coming up and once I heard my supervisor tell the sergeant major that we just didn't have time to accomplish a task yet. The sergeant major asked my supervisor if she slept that night? She replied yes...he said...then you had time.

And then...a trainer or weight watcher leader, I can't remember which, was always saying you make time for what you want to do.

Time is like money...the more you have the more you spend.

I don't know what I'm talking about...have a nice weekend.

Donkey on 09/12/2020:
LOL, I can't say that I disagree with the sergeant major. He's right. That's why my entry yesterday was so short. Work just takes up more of the pie.

I often wish that I did not need so much sleep (7 hours is great, can function with 6). I could get so much done, if I didn't waste it sleeping.

I am definitely appreciating the value of time. It *IS* a LOT like money. I am exchanging my time for money (i.e. paycheck).

Jacky82020 on 09/11/2020:
Oh, I always thought time was like money because you don’t want to waste it

Donkey on 09/12/2020:
True - plus, it isn't exactly the same, because the potential for more money is always there. Our time has limits, one way or the other.

People can have a lot of money, but if they are on their deathbed, they can't buy more time here on this earth.

bearcountrygg on 09/11/2020:
I guess that is the lot in life of being the boss......business owner etc. The work is never done, it's just like dirty dishes or dirty laundry....you finally get it done and within minutes something is dirty again. Funny IP...she does know what she is talking about...LOL Congrats with yesterdays food and water.....!!!

Donkey on 09/12/2020:
My boss is an old pro. It took him all day, but he caught up on everything that needed to be done for me, PLUS things that needed to be done for everyone else.

He was also in a very good mood, so he didn't mind having stuff to do, I think. He completely understood that we were THAT busy while he was away.

Horn_of_plenty on 09/11/2020:
let us know how it goes with boss' first day back!

Donkey on 09/12/2020:
You're not going to believe this but not only did HE catch up on everything I left for him, but also, **I** caught up and was able to leave work BEFORE 5:30p!!!!

That was the best part - that I got to leave on time on a Friday !!!!

Donkey - Thursday Sep 10, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

 Before anything else,  I want to thank Happy for her suggestion on what to do with Baby Kitty.  I'm looking into options.


Once again,  I was extraordinarily busy at work,  but for the moments that I wasn't lost in the busyness, I was feeling pretty positive and up.  Not sure how or why or where this came from.  

I'm going to have to let go of the abs challenge,  and while I'm still trying to hang on to the 22 push-ups, that too is a struggle. 

I guess I've just gotten to the point that I'm giving all that I can to anyone or anything,  and I don't care about falling short at this time. There's just no more in me to give more. 

So until work stops consuming so much of my life, this is how it will be. And I've accepted that. 

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 09/10/2020:
How old is the kitty? Is this the one not using the litter box? How’s it going?

Donkey on 09/11/2020:
Kitty is 2 years old. She almost died from a fungal infection that has affected her nerves. But she does use the box to poop.

So to be clear, yes this is the cat who has issues using the box.

grannyannie on 09/10/2020:
Work, unfortunately, wins for now.

Back in the 90's when I worked at a university in the US the gym was in the building next door. As staff I had my own permanent locker there. So I never had an excuse not to go to the gym before going home (which was less than 1 mile away).

Donkey on 09/11/2020:
Good observation that I had missed. Location was one of the things about the gym I belong to now. It's not very convenient to get to. It's not near anywhere I travel to on a regular basis.

I feel that if I didn't need so much sleep, I could go at night, but then I wouldn't get into bed until nearly 11p, which makes getting up at 5:30a impossible.

Donkey on 09/11/2020:
So I'm probably being too hard in myself in expectations (aspirations).

bearcountrygg on 09/10/2020:
I reached a point in my life at one time when there was just nothing left in me too.....there was no way around it....I had to call a halt to adding anything else.....it eventually passed and it got easier again....that will happen for you...you can only give what you have to give...don't stress about it...the time will come.

Donkey on 09/11/2020:
Yes, this too shall pass. I just need to be patient. Not one of my strong points, lol.

Maria7 on 09/10/2020:
We all have to accept our limitations. And we all DO have them but we do the best we can and be content for what we are able to accomplish each day, albeit we all feel sometimes that we fall so short of what we had hoped to achieve. Something is better than nothing. Have a happy day.

Donkey on 09/11/2020:
True, and I usually do leave work feeling like I've accomplished much.

I probably don't appreciate that feeling enough.

Horn_of_plenty on 09/10/2020:
that's a fine way to see things - everything cannot get your all, all at the same time. life. you have to pick and choose.

also, i tend to feel my best in September also: after the summer, still prettty warm...like a continuation of the summer :) but more comfortable.

Donkey on 09/11/2020:
If real estate would slow down, it might feel more like September. This is like July busy.

Jacky82020 on 09/11/2020:
Donkey, you sound like a patient good kitty mommy

Donkey - Wednesday Sep 09, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

Not a great day.  Still waaaaay too busy at work.  Loads of new contracts came in. Which means I'll be totally busy for the next 6 weeks....  

So I'd better figure myself out,  because ain't nothing changing soon as far as work-life balance...

It does mean no Zoom yoga for another week. Not helping. 

I had a slight food fit last night.  It first started with just eating a bit more,  with nuts for evening snack.  Not bad. Then I had a Kind bar. Okay.  Then I dove into a bag of marshmallows.  UH-OH!

My food fit was interrupted by a family fight on the phone between husband and son.  So it was good that I stopped but not for a good reason.

Today will be a trying day.  TOM started this morning, and mine are really hard on my body. Plus, really busy at work.  Plus, very worried about our son.  Plus, concerned about my husband. Don't see enough of my daughter because of work.

And the garage door is still broken.




Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

grannyannie on 09/09/2020:
Sigh. Hope the rest of your week is better!!

Donkey on 09/10/2020:
Thank you! Wednesday was actually ok, internally. I felt pretty positive about myself, so that's a start.

Jacky82020 on 09/09/2020:

Donkey on 09/10/2020:
LOL! Thank you!

bearcountrygg on 09/09/2020:
Tough week there....thankfully it's a short week.

Donkey on 09/10/2020:
Amen to that although, add I write this, I'm a little discouraged that it's not Friday yet.

Horn_of_plenty on 09/09/2020:
Does anyone at work work as hard as you!?

cheering you on!

Donkey on 09/10/2020:
Thank you! This week, I would say everyone is working a lot, although I was the last to leave.

And I'm pretty sure no one else is dealing with cramps right now. Always an added challenge.

legcramps on 09/09/2020:
This is a tough time for you, I hope you are able to carve some time out of the week for yourself to do whatever you please with.

Donkey on 09/10/2020:
Good point! I realized on my lunchtime walk (at 3p) how much being outdoors helps my overall well-being. It's so important that I get that midday walk.

Maria7 on 09/09/2020:
Try to take it easy and do something relaxing just for you. We can only 'manage' but we cannot 'control', my Aunt taught me, regarding situations we worry about.

Donkey on 09/10/2020:
That's a great reminder! I've not heard it said that way, about managing rather than controlling.

I've been grabbing small bits of "me moments" because that's all I can manage to do at this time. Hopefully, Saturday and or Sunday will bring more time for me to decompress.

Maria7 on 09/10/2020:
When she told me that, it helped me a lot. I've always been a kind of person to try to 'fix' things and get terribly stressed when that doesn't work out. So, now I am so much more 'relaxed', just telling myself we can only 'manage' but we cannot 'control' a lot of things/situations that we worry about. It was a big relief when my Aunt told me that. Smile.

Donkey - Tuesday Sep 08, 2020
(Low carb eating w recumbent bike, yoga, weights)
Weight: 143.5

 So after I posted on Sunday,  things went south,  just in case you thought it was a perfect weekend in Donkey's life.   For the remainder of Sunday and into Monday,  I was dealing with someone who, obviously upset,  was confusing laundry baskets with litter boxes. 

Adding  to this,  someone broke the garage door.  This resulted in yelling,  which doesn't fix anything and caused more friction.   

Went to the hardware store, not to fix the garage door but other broken things, and that was a success. 

I did make it to the gym,  (with Daughter ,  a rare treat!) and the "easier" workout kicked my butt.  I was so hungry after that. So I probably ate too much in the evening. 

What awaits me at work will tell me if my "extremely busy" status will continue or start to subside.

Progress as of today: 43 lbs lost so far, only 8.5 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 09/08/2020:
UGH...No words...((HUGS))

grannyannie on 09/08/2020:
Oh no! How stressful! Hope the rest of the week is good.

Jacky82020 on 09/08/2020:
How old is the kitty who goes in the wrong places? Sorry you had stressful weekend.

happy-1 on 09/08/2020:
I'm thinking kitty needs a smaller space to be in unsupervised. Like a dog crate?

thinkpositive on 09/08/2020:
Sounds like you are doing a good job of recovering from all of that!

Horn_of_plenty on 09/08/2020:
sorry that you face a bit of challenges that challenged your ability to have a relaxing weekend!!! i'm cheering you on for this week!

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