Gained 2.5 pounds. Not happy.
Taking a road trip today to see my daughter perform with the high school band at the state competition later this morning. It is sure to delight!
Progress as of today: 56 lbs lost so far, only -6 lbs to go!
Went back to work, although I was still feeling like a Zombie... My heart wasn't really in it, which REALLY helped me keep a PROPER and HEALTHY distance from my involvement in the files. Also, not having my heart into my work helped me appreciate what my co-worker did while I was away, as she covered my emails.
It was so dead last week, but the 2 days I was out, it was like crazy-busy, and everyone wanted everything NOW. Seriously, people -- it's real estate. It's not a trial, where your personal freedom is at stake. It's not surgery where your health/life is at stake. I felt so bad for my co-worker, even though she was one of the backstabbers in December. So a couple of things I said to her, that I think helped:
This is awful to say, but it seems that in order to keep my sanity, I have to be less invested in producing a better work product. Otherwise, I get so uptight, upset, and stressed, so that while it's done correctly, I'm a mess and nobody likes me. That sucks.
Anyway, trying to be more intuitive at dinner. Must work on eating slower, I think. I think that will help me eat less. Trying to stay away from the leftover chocolate cake. I didn't do so well yesterday. Had 3 small slivers after dinner, even though I wrote about the cake here in DD right before dinner. Tonight, made myself a cup of decaf. That will hold me.
Goals Progress: I bought my next color for my hair. January was "dark brown", and the next box is "soft black". Still sticking to a dress pallet of navy, black, and gray -- makes getting dressed in the morning SO much quicker and easier. Keeping up with my daily Gratitude diary.
But I need to add a temporary goal for the end of this month and February, to stay at 128-ish and not let the stress and sadness overcome me and creep back into the 130s.
Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!
I know exactly how you feel... but a company rarely has more than one badly done deal/project in them. The second one kills it.
Do you ever read fail blogs?
Today was the Big Good-Bye... to my son. I know he'll have a tough 6 weeks ahead of him. The house seems so empty without him...
So YES, I did take care of myself today, and did not go into work, even though I could have gone in for half a day. Instead, I let myself just relax and settle into the quietness of the day. My husband took a long nap; my daughter had to work. So I watched TV, did some crosswords, rode my stationary bike...
Last night, I did resist the leftover chocolate cake and Oreo ice cream we had from Sunday's dinner, but I did not do so well with dinner itself, eating too much spaghetti with meat sauce. I curbed my desire for dessert with a cup of decaf coffee with flavored creamer.
A couple of folks here have talked about looking forward to gummy vitamin supplements as a "treat" -- oh my goodness, I thought I was the only one!!! In the morning, after I exercise, I have 2 gummies for hair/skin/nails. At night, I take 2 fruit-flavored Tums (for calcium) and 2 melatonin gummies. Sometimes I REALLY look forward to these "treats". I also take glucosamine tablets, one in the morning and one at night, but those are swallowed whole, so that's not a treat. I thought the glucosamine would help with my knee/back/hips, but I can't say that I've noticed much improvement or change.
Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!
anyways, i'm sure his training will be very tough, he must keep his head up especially at beginning where it's more a mental game.
Very hard...
Overindulged with a good-bye dinner on Saturday at the restaurant. Had a mint fudge sundae for dessert, too. Then last night, made a cake and had ice cream, too.
Now I find out that we're going out to breakfast before we take our son to the recruiter's office... which I agree with, so that we're not worrying about lunch during all of this.
I've got some things going on hormonally -- cycle is way off, skin is breaking out. Probably stress... Just have to get through this day, this week...
Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!
i'm sure you are very stressed about your son leaving for training. remember you need to take care of YOU....i think what might have been doing on is your wanting to take good care of your son and you stopped thinking about you...also, if you are indulging in cakes, maybe next time do not make cake? unless your family really wants it...lol...
I seem to be stuck at this number...
This is the last weekend with our son before he leaves for boot camp. Monday is the day we take him. Tuesday he departs.
Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!
maybe once your son is gone you can go lower. how tall are you?
Had a lot planned to do this weekend, as far as working around the house, and it seems as though mopping up the floor is just now too much for my back to handle. So I spent about 30 minutes icing my back and now will rest for the remainder of the day.
I had the planned the following:
This is what actually happened:
Oh I just realized there is ONE MORE can of paint in the basement that didn't get brought up. THIRTY-ONE CANS OF FREAKING PAINT!!!!
This is making me feel very anxious...
Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!
My dad was complaining his back hurt this weekend - but was still exercising - his pain mustn't have been very minimal.
Weight did not budge this week. 
I wanted to post from work yesterday that "B*tchy co-workers make me want to eat less" but I couldn't remember my password to this site, since I'd have to log in from my phone. Doesn't matter -- I ended up eating most of my snacks anyway. Got into it with my 2 co-workers again. The Impossible One (lady) started on me, and the guy sitting next to her was like, "Well, since you don't want to help..." to me. I said, It's not that I don't want to help, I just don't want to get yelled at. So now, no more helping, since it will only get me yelled at.
My dear husband, though: I texted him on my phone about what happened and he was so supportive. Now that he is no longer working, he doesn't have his own work-drama to stew about and can be there for me. 
I didn't dwell on it though; I told him that I'm just going to focus on my own well-being and happiness with my family. Instantly made me feel so much better. This was a "must add" to my Gratitude Diary (New Year's Resolution #3).
Speaking of New Year's resolutions, I would like to add that for Resolution #1, that includes, not only wearing more black, but navy and gray will qualify under this category as well. This is working very well for me. 
There's been some discussion about "sneaky eating" and I realized that it is THIS that has me so bothered about last weekend's indulgence while watching the movie: Hiding the wrappers! It was hiding the empty Chex Mix bag and the empty marshmallow bag that freaked me out. So even though it was planned eating, controlled, etc., the thoughts and behaviors around the eating is what has me so bothered. My husband was in the room, on the computer with his headset on. I guess I was hiding my eating from him. Painful memories of past behaviors/problems.
Anyway, I have another chance, because my daughter told me that she wants to watch the movie with me - which is fine by me. I love Fred Astaire's dancing! I can re-do the memory and establish positive thoughts and feelings, rather than the ones I've been carrying around with me since last Friday. And so for today, I am grateful for second chances.
EVENING UPDATE: Daughter bailed on me for a sleepover, LOL -- which is perfectly understandable and OK with me. Not that I won't miss spending time with her, but I completely get it.
Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!
With the hiding of food - remember how far you've come and everything you've learned in this process of years of weight loss ! You are better now and learned so much ! Me too!
You have a lot more knowledge now - the negative memories may linger but be happy you are no longer in that place !!!! I sure am so happy I am not in the lowest of places either when I was at my highest- almost 25 lbs larger and that's a lot of weight to gain in only 2 years which is what i did both times I gained weight itbwas fast without any thought - sorry if too much info please tell me ?
We are beyond these points now - we know what to do to be more moderate and make it work out ..... your memories are there but will lesson as time goes by - I had forgotten lots till thinking about lunch own self just now
Had a lovely lunchtime walk today - and tomorrow will be even warmer! (Then the cold and snow comes back...) I walked the whole lunch hour and then ate at my desk.
Tried coffee flavored Kombucha today... I think I could get acquired to other flavors, but not the coffee flavor. Too bitter, but I'm so glad I got the chance to try it for free!
I really enjoy wearing more black at the office. Cuts way down on my decision-making process in the morning.
Spent most of my day listing to sitar music at my desk. I never realized how relaxing listening to the sitar is for me.
My husband had a lot of medical tests today. His workplace knows now that he's not coming back to work. I often feel that I'm a by-stander in my own life, just watching the changes rolling by and I'm quite helpless to interfere.
Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!
I know that some of you have been having sleepy days lately, but I don't know what happend to me today: woke up sooner than expected and had tons of energy (once I got out of bed). I was able to finish my workout early, so I ran for a mile on the treadmill. Adding a mile is something that I wanted to do as a 2018 goal, but then reconsidered, as it might not be something that's required EVERY day.
I am working on graduating from a protein shake breakfast to eating real food. So I have substituted the 12 ounces of almond milk and scoop of protein, with 1/2 cup of oatmeal (not instant), 1/4 cup of walnuts, and 8 ounces of same almond milk. Seems to be working for a weekday breakfast. Weekends are different.
My lunchtime walk was wonderful! Not only is Chicagoland getting a little warmer (feels like early Spring!), but I found a new street to walk down with lovely houses to look at and admire - like an entire new neighborhood to check out!
Later in the afternoon, one of our notoriously toxic clients came in, and I was so happy that all I had to do was greet her and ask her to have a seat. After that, my other 2 co-workers got stuck dealing with her, and I got to leave -- on time! I think I was smiling on my way out the door! That is when I realized what effect toxic people have on my well-being.
I get that we all have our quirks, every one of us is carrying his/her own burdens, etc. And I'm not sure that my workplace is any worse than other workplaces -- in fact, I'm pretty thankful for what it is, because it could be much worse. And I thought about our toxic client: she's not mean or nasty, but she just saps all of the happiness and energy out of me with all of her personal drama that really has nothing to do with her real estate transaction. Thank goodness she came in at the end of the day so that her visit didn't infect my mood for the rest of the day. Thank goodness I'm not related to her -- see, again, could be worse!
And on my way home, I visualized a wall switch, and turned my workday "OFF".
No WONDER I gained weight working at this place. I used to eat chips and chocolate to self-medicate through this cr*p. I have to learn not to take such matters to heart, I think.
Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!
"Hold onto Kindness" --- a story shared on Facebook. Going to add this as a daily mantra.
I am going to write about last night. Saturdays are usually my "relax" day to keep me sane, food-wise. So if I'm going to indulge, it's usually on a Saturday. Last night though... I was watching a movie downstairs (Holiday Inn with Bing Crosby and Fred Astaire), and I don't know what came over me. Almost felt like binge-eating, but I did think this out beforehand. I wanted to finish the bag of Chex Mix - probably 1 cup, possibly 1.5 cups, but then I graduated onto finishing up the bag of giant marshmallows in the pantry (had 3 -- I almost thought there were 4 but was happy that there were only 3 as that is what I had anticipated eating). I had been longing for those marshmallows for QUITE time...
Then I was full.
No kidding - that was like an additional 600 calories!
Woke up late this morning, still full -- Sundays are becoming my day to sleep in, since the Today Show is usually a re-cap of the week, and the other news shows don't start until 9am here. So I got some added (and needed) rest, got up, exercised while watching the TV, and then had a lsmall, light breakfast. But now I feel lunch gnawing at me....
But back to last night's eating... I'm not sure why this is bothering me so much. My eating was intentional; I saved these delights for Saturday, so this was planned. And overall I do like to have a higher calorie day in there, to keep my metabolism guessing. And I do allow myself to indulge on Saturdays -- although I don't always.
Maybe that's what's bothering me? Maybe it feels counter-intuitive to eat more on a bad weigh-in day? Or maybe I'm just being too hard on myself. "Hold onto Kindness" has to begin with myself.
Progress as of today: 58.5 lbs lost so far, only -8.5 lbs to go!
What would've happened to me: I would've started with the Chex Mix, with the intention of following up with the marshmallows and quitting afterwards. Then I would've thought, hey why not also eat 1 graham cracker and a small piece of chocolate with one of the marshmallows (smore). After the first one, I would've decided to do the same thing on the 2nd marshmallow and then the 3rd. By that time I would've decided that I might as well just turn this one day into a full-on cheat day. Would've hopped in the car and headed for the grocery store or nearest convenience store. Last year, Chex Mix and 3 marshmallows easily could've turned into a 1000+ calorie leap off the wagon for me.
Yes good job on only 600 cal ! That's far from a disaster. I have also learned a lot these couple years now and try also to prevent the worst and just moderately indulge instead! We are way better off this way!
Also commented below ;)
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Have fun today!
It was wonderful! It took more of the day than I had expected, but the music was wonderful. My daughter's group did really well! And it was nice to spend time with my husband and my daughter, before she leaves us soon too...
Maria7 on 01/28/2018:
Try not to stress about the gain during this winter season. You've come a long way.