Wednesday was a HUGE DRAMA day and did not have time to log in, unfortunately. Hey, it was either log in or do upper body weight training, and I'm proud to say that I did my weight training! I'm kind of sacrificing my lower body weight training by logging in now, but I'll still get it in tonight.
Work drama: Queen Bee called Associate Attorney an ass in front of everyone, and that pissed off Nice Lady in a BIG way. THAT won't be forgotten for a long time, I tell you.... Nice Lady is too nice to say anything about it, but when she's mad at you, you KNOW you did something wrong. And I agree -- Queen Bee was way out of line on her comment -- on so many levels.
In addition to this drama, I had actual drama relating to my work -- scheduling real estate closings and trying to get everyone ready for that is not as easy as one might think -- and on top of that, I had an unexpected 2-hour software training session PLUS had to leave early for my doctor's appointment! Yesterday was NOT a quiet day for me.
So the doctor tells me that I'm pretty anemic, so I have an appointment to get an ultrasound and then an appointment with a GI doctor, to see if I need to get scoped. I'm either losing too much blood during TOM (time of month) or I'm losing blood through my GI tract and just haven't noticed. This could probably explain why I feel drained a lot of the time, even with lots of food and good sleep. I wonder if this has to do with that "heavy leg" feeling too. I'm not sure if it relates to having thinning hair, but I guess that's why my nails continue to split even after taking biotin, collagen, etc. I'm pretty sure the problem is uterine and not GI related but I guess that's what the tests will determine. In the meantime, I'll be taking even more iron to try get my levels up to where they belong.
Last night I did upper body weight training, and I've decided to move up to my next higher dumbbells which are 15 lbs. I probably won't be able to do many reps, but that's how lifting heavier works. I just have to tell myself that this is OK, that significant work is still being done, even if it's not a certain "set" number I have in my brain. Once the 15 lbs becomes "too easy", then I can re-evaluate. I am not sure I want to buy anything heavier than that, but I definitely have time to think about that, because using 15 lbs dumbbells will definitely be a challenge for these noodle arms of mine.
Progress as of today: 53.5 lbs lost so far, only -3.5 lbs to go!
A little more snow today, and then rain or freezing rain later on. I am leaving work early today to go to the doctor's for a follow-up appointment, to go over my blood test results. The vitamin supplements I'm taking have already made a huge difference - at least in how I feel - but if she thinks I need prescription strength stuff, then OK... at least for a while. I didn't see anything else in the blood test results that raised red flags to me -- like thyroid issues, blood sugar, etc. But we'll see what she says.
Tonight is upper body workout. I've been wanting to work my abs every night, but on nights that I don't do weights, I forget to work the abs. I did some quick reading on what it takes - eating wise - to get that really lean appearance. It's not really practical for where I'm at in life right now. Would like to see more "pop" in my arm muscles though. I guess that would mean serious higher weights.
Work continues to be drama, especially since we're slow right now, so there's time for whispers and stuff. However, I am getting a better sense of the dynamics of certain co-workers.... Although I do not think I am wrong in certain assessments, I now understand why certain things are the way they are, so if that's what it takes to make people run efficiently, then so be it. That is to say, we all have our vices. I can only change me --- and I'm not even sure I can do that much to change myself, LOL. I am a crusty ol' Donkey, after all, stubborn and ornery.
Progress as of today: 53.5 lbs lost so far, only -3.5 lbs to go!
my abs are better than they were any other year, and i do less for them.
abs were never my strong suit. but, as i keep pushing my ability with the situps and as i keep progressing in lunges and other leg work and keep walking with cardio, my abs are progressing ANYWAYS! so, i learned that less is more.
and the less fat you have, the more you see the abs. yeah, it's true they are made in the kitchen.
at work i don't usually sit with great posture. i feel if i did, my abs would be even better, except, i would rather sit comfortably. i do realize also i do not stand well on public transportation or sit well as the bus and train seats are sorta uncomfortable for short people...so right now i just leave it alone and work on my abs at home, and try to walk with good posture overall.
I thought about what your wrote, about abs being made in the kitchen.... and I think I like food too much to be THAT disciplined for chiseled abs. Wah wah!
But my core is STRONG. It's amazing how strong it is. A while back I took part in a plank challenge, it was a 30 day challenge, and you had to work your way up to a plank-off on the last day - basically holding the position for as long as possible. I lasted 5 minutes! It was amazing, and I learned something that day... I AM Strong. I might not always look or feel strong, but there it is. The proof.
So I will keep on working the abs, but I do not think that I want to be that disciplined with eating to get that kind of definition.
Getting back on track to what worked for me before. Stepping back from being so focused on "keto" and doing what works for me -- which is still essentially keto (more keto than low carb/high fat, which apparently is something different).
Had a good lower body weight workout last night. Debated on whether to have a piece of chocolate after dinner or after workout, but then realized that I didn't really need it, so I just got ready for bed. I feel like I slept well - FitBit says I did, too - but I did wake up with a little "heavy leg" feeling, probably from the weights. So I kept my morning bike ride long but lighter.
My son was saying that when he went for his latest physical for his military re-entry that there were guys there that looked like they could snap bodies in half, but he still looks quite skinny (to himself). Boy do I feel his pain! And he HAS bulked up a quite a bit with the upper body on top, but to look at him you wouldn't think that he could do serious bodily harm -- know what I'm saying? He's still long and lanky, even with the added upper body muscle he's managed to train into. So this afternoon, if it's slow at work, I think I'll read up on how to eat for a leaner body.
Progress as of today: 53.5 lbs lost so far, only -3.5 lbs to go!
I'm very glad you are sticking with the weights. I do wake up with tired legs sometimes after doing lower body exercises the night before.
Well, as your son gets older, it will be increasingly easier to keep bulking :) he has to start somewhere, and, at least he's not a fatty ;) i know what you mean. he's up against guys that lift weights since they were in HS or were extremely athetic then which makes it easier for them now to gain in the msucle...i get you. they have prob been doing it much longer (even if his age, they have trained a little longer or had some extra weight / muscle to start with!)
I'd remind him of the progress he's made. and that anything is possible, but to not overtrain or try things that are too heavy too fast or it will just injure him.
i'd remind him that he can get to where he wants to be, by being consistent like you are! you're a great role model in this area for your son!
consistency is key :)
i'm not relating this experience to your son, as he HAS been training and he's a lot younger with more potential to grow stronger. two very different parts of life, your son and I.
I'm just saying that compared to my workplace, i look great and fit. but put with with a different population and all of a sudden i look weak or out of shape comparatively.!!!!!
most important is to not compare too much. to remember how far you have come. and try to go on your own journey at least somewhat!
I understand what you are saying about the comparisons though, and I completely agree.
Had to shovel this morning, even though I heard someone go out last night to shovel around 10:30p. Even though it is not above freezing here, the sun is out and is managing to start melting snow off the sidewalks and driveways, at least. On my lunchtime walk, I started feeling more hopeful and optimistic. (Almost) Looking forward to bowling with co-workers this Friday. Looking forward to my/our getaway next weekend. I must remember this, though, when it starts to snow again on Wednesday, especially since I have to drive to my doctor's appointment follow-up on the slick roads.
Wedding ring was tight this morning. Definitely feeling bloated - and I do not think this is water retention. I planned out my meals with LOTS of vegetables, and a grapefruit and stewed cranberries (sugar free - not too many of these). Tonight is lower weights workout.
My son said the nicest thing to me last night: "I'm so sick of all this keto food! Mom, you look fine!"
Progress as of today: 53.5 lbs lost so far, only -3.5 lbs to go!
Is the bowling during after work Friday or in the afternoon? that sounds fun!
i'm glad you got out to walk and that you continue thru winter. it's the only way and it's what we all do at work, too. It's very important to keep walking and take a moment out from your desk during the day!!!!
It is snowing yet again. We are expecting 3-4 inches today. It will snow on and off throughout most of the day. It looks like it's lightening up a bit, so I am working up to getting out there.
Just so you know that it ain't easy for me either, I did struggle again last night. Sugar free chocolate I made with baker's chocolate, coconut oil, and Swerve.
I made peach flavored gummies last night, and today I plan to make another full batch of stewed cranberries. The cranberries often take the edge off of the sweets craving at the end of the day. I am toying with makimg a keto chocolate cake, but I think with the way I've been struggling, I'd better hold off another week.
I've also been struggling at work, so I decided that I need a mini-vacation from work. My husband is looking into a bed-and-breakfast, and frankly, this whole process is stressing me out - LOL!
I volunteered at the legal clinic on Saturday, and again - struggling. Hard to find joy, short on patience.
Plans for today: Shovel, read, make cranberries, fold laundry, make fathead dough batch, upper body weight training.
EVENING EDIT: Struggled at lunch, after shoveling. Finished off the sugar free chocolate - due to a stressful conversation with my husband. Yes, completely stress eating. I DO NOT RECOMMEND DOING THIS. However, afterward I had had the chocolate, and then a proper lunch (in that order), I actually felt full. I don't often feel full after I eat. Hmm...
I went out and shoveled again at around 2:30p, when it had finally stopped snowing. It started up again this evening, though, and I could go back out there again to shovel if I was so inclined. I am not, because I want to get in my upper body weights and then get ready for bed.
It's a little later right now, because I decided to make the cranberries after all. That is the only thing I did not get done, and then I decided that I would like to have this as an available dessert after all.
My conversation with my husband was stressful and discouraging, but aftewards, I realized that everything will be OK, whether I stress about it or not. So that helped me not stress about it any more.
Tomorrow is a bank and mail holiday, so it should be fairly quiet. Queen Bee is taking the day off (because it's a school holiday too). Wednesday is my follow-up doctor's appointment at 3:15p. I think I will try to leave work at 1pm if I can. I want to see if it's being at work that's causing me to feel burned out, or if it's just this never-ending winter weather.
Progress as of today: 53.5 lbs lost so far, only -3.5 lbs to go!
I am so sorry you got the snow again! holy cow!...i'll write more later, but i gotta tell you, I'm feeling like i want to just be home today too.
PS - i also made cranberries!!!! i have one more bag left in my freezer! If i see any at the store today or tomorrow, i might buy some more! they were so tasty all season. lately i enjoy them with full fat greek yogurt. so good.
the fathead dough - which recipe? can you send it or give me a link to that one?
oh and your sugar free chocolate recipe is similar to the one i saw for the reese's cups and interestingly, the chocolate chips i have that are made with stevia have an even simpler recipe, melting them, adding pb, and adding more melted choc on top. too simple i think to be great, so i'll use the recipe that includes coconut oil and some sweetener too.
today i'm light on plans, so yeah, it's been a nice day home - but i'm glad i have several low cal options here at home. ..like have a few chocolate chips (stevia) and other options rather than eat a whole thing of cookies. i have options = easier to follow thru. I understand how you feel. also the labor of the shoveling may induce some hunger!
https://www.wholesomeyum.com/recipes/fathead-pizza-crust-low-carb-keto-gluten-free-nut-free/
I usually add onion powder, garlic powder, Italian seasoning or oregano to the mixture, if I am making this savory. Maybe top with chia seeds, sesame seeds? I recently bought "Everything But The Bagel" seasoning - the toppings on those "everything bagels" - and that's delicious!
If I were making this sweet, I suppose you could add something like cinnamon.
I use this as flatbread -- only made pizza once. My daughter dips this in her hummus. I could see spreading cream cheese on this. Perhaps peanut butter if you made a sweet version.
Try to keep on with the job and to keep your life interesting to a degree outside work!
With the burnout feeling, try to keep your passions. like your cooking and preparing new and typical things you like :)
i think that everyone is a little fed up with the Winter season and i do feel that people are not as positive this time of year....
This is not working. Whatever I'm doing - it is not working. I've gained beyond the parameter (limit) I set for myself for "winter weight". My pants are starting to feel too tight and don't fit me properly. Hormones and cravings were crazy this week. Funny how I woke up on Friday and felt like I was starting to feel back to myself -- like a wearwolf turning back into a human, almost. Hard to explain, I guess more like a tornado starting to dissolve back into a whiff of air, maybe.
So here's looking ahead to a more normal week. I can only hope that the scale follows suit.
I told myself that I would stick with the heavier weights through the end of February. I'm committed to doing that, so that will not change for now.
I'm re-evaluating the keto thing. I did better on a low carb/healthy fat/lean protein diet than I'm doing on keto -- at least as far as numbers on the scale went. I'm not ready to switch off of keto, but definitely doing some soul searching to see if this is the right thing for me. Kind of along the lines of the self-discovery I made about intermittent fasting - if a cup of coffee with cream in it will keep me from eating longer, then USE IT as a tool -- who cares if it's not "technically" fasting.
This whole week might just be a blip in the journey - hormones, miserable weather, bloating, work drama, my kids' futures -- in which case, it would be hasty to make changes right now.
Progress as of today: 53.5 lbs lost so far, only -3.5 lbs to go!
i am supportive of the intermittent fasting / prolonging breakfast ideas. yes.
use everything you learned to make things best for YOU!
Happy Valentine's Day!! Trying hard to stay positive today. My FitBit says that I got enough sleep but I am really feeling TIRED this morning. I really must try much harder tonight to get to bed earlier.
My rings are tight this morning - so retaining water or gaining weight. My dress pants for work are starting to feel too tight for my comfort level, but I have sensory issues... so it may be that either the pants are actually fitting the way they are supposed to (quite often the case with me) or it could be an underwear issue. Or I'm gaining weight - LOL.
Just gotta keep where I'm at until Spring arrives. Today is supposed to be a warmer day at 46F, so I hope to get in a nice walk at lunchtime.
AFTERNOON EDIT: Breaking my rule again about logging in at work... because the boss has gone home early, and I have pretty much nothing to do. I will be leaving soon myself.
I've been craving sugar big-time today. And I have upper body workout tonight - UGH. We'll see how the evening plays out - whatever happens, I truly do want to keep my food in check and get to bed early. Both of those would be great Valentine's Day gifts to myself.
Progress as of today: 56.5 lbs lost so far, only -6.5 lbs to go!
Finally it's warmer by you! We also reached just around your temp today, but colder than that for most of the day (around 40F here).
I'm also working on maintaining till Spring. Like you, my goal is more to "lean up" thru developing more muscle / retaining my muscle / working on gaining strength!
Some of my coworkers weren't in great moods today. Either due to memories of divorce or that the guy one is seeing hasn't been as loving as he has used to be...for once, i'm in a good position myself (actually semi dating someone). so, it's a nice change :)
also, with the chocolate / sugar craving you are mentioning, remember, a little taste can go a long way. meaning, a little taste (i tend to even buy single servings of truffles at a deli for like 50 cents, and have it with coffee). or the cooked cranberries do work with a keto chocolate and coffee, etc. try to listen to your body a little, it will probably help you out. just my advice based on past experiences going too long carb for my body...
like you, the goal for me is for decent sleep :)
Thought I'd log in this morning from home, rather than try to get to work early - what for? Feeling kind of down this morning, but that could be due to a number of things:
I know I'll be OK, though, and can ride this out.
I came to the realization Monday night that I need to work a plan that works for me. I've been trying to get into this intermittent fasting thing, where I fast for 16 hours and then have a window of eating for 8 hours - in any given 24 hour period - but running into problems with needing a cup of coffee in the morning (with creamer) and artificial sweetener. I've also been trying to follow keto rules, which have been conflicting with flavor packets that I put in my water. I've been trying to follow the suggestions for weight training, but not so happy with the number on the scale.
What brought me to the realization that I need to do what works for me is a video that someone posted on a keto Facebook page talking about how this doctor (Dr. Berg) sometimes has his morning coffee with cream in it to help him prolong his morning fast. So that's not really fasting, but the point is that he has a little "something with substance" (i.e. the cream in his coffee) to help him not eat until later in the day. THIS is what I was doing until I was lectured that this is not fasting. True, this is not fasting, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't have benefits. Not only for myself but also for society as a whole, because if you know me, I MUST have my coffee in the morning or I cannot function in society as a productive member. (Perhaps as a destructive or non-productive member of society --- and I kid you not: BAD THINGS happen when I do not or cannot have coffee in the morning!!!)
Last night I did my lower body workout, but left out a couple of exercises. I just got to the point where I was tired, it was getting late, I wanted to get ready for bed -- I'm like, that's it, no more, I've done enough for today. I *DO* like the alternate days of weights though. It shortens the time for each session - LOL! Can you tell that I just do not like weight training? Oh dear... another miserable failure.
This morning, in the natural daylight, I looked in the full-length mirror that we have -- I do this regularly to check on the status of my fat knees and upper inner-thigh fat that I HATE. Knees and thighs show no improvement, but I noticed that my calves are getting little lines that define the muscles. That's kind of cool! Wish I could see that in my shoulder/bicep/tricep area. Not seeing any ab action either. Sometimes I see the lines on the side - the obliques? But I'd like to see some of the six-pack muscles start to show themselves. Not sure if that's possible with all the extra skin from 2 huge babies and protruding uterine fibroids in the lower abdomen. *sigh*
Progress as of today: 56.5 lbs lost so far, only -6.5 lbs to go!
Also - you are NOT FAILING. You are SUCCEEDING at determining what's important to your health and your routine. This is how it's done!
I don't see how it's a failure to do part of the weights routine. it's just recently that you started adding weights in...you are still getting used to it - not even half the month has passed yet! KEEP ON!
I do exercises for my calves at each weights workout. Toe stands / raises. I do it at least 20 reps in a row, 3 sets...or i do what i can and what i feel like (# of reps varies) at my 3 sets.
I don't love my legs either. They aren't very muscular. However, they have improved overall especially over these past 2 years with increased walks home (this year) and increased lunge/squat routines (past 2 years). the difference is VERY noticable. same for my calves. BIG improvement from the time they shriveled up to nothing after a year of doing not too much due to the shin splints. it takes work to have these changes, but if you KEEP DOING the activity, changes will come there's no getting around it!!! :)
I also like a defined calf muscle look over that skinny calf look.
you have uterine fibroids? can it be taken care of?
next, anything is possible if you keep on you keep seeing more changes. your body will change as you continue your exercises.
Breaking my own rule by logging in at work. I think I'm getting a new computer relatively soon, so I'm not as bothered by the whole issue.
Last night, I was still struggling with eating. Overdid it with "dessert" and now I have no more fat bombs left. However, in thinking this through, I know what I did wrong and I know what I did right.
WRONG: didn't have any fat/protein for my afternoon snack. Came home starving for dinner. This approach sets me up to be vulnerable.
RIGHT: used fat to reach my point of satiety, which is exactly what to do on keto, in spite of the extra calories. Seems weird, but it's how the science behind the diet works.
Found out that my son is leaving on Monday for boot camp. This came about unexpectedly sooner than we all thought would happen. Wow. I think that's what just pushed me over the edge - once again - with desserts.
Woke up today, though, not feeling wonderful -- I blame mostly hormones, but it might have been the fat too. Did my cardio, and then went outside to shovel an inch of ice (with a dusting of snow) on the driveway. I had to have my son's help, it was so heavy. Now my back is killing me. I do not know what we will do about snow removal next winter, if we are still here in Illinois, which I think we will be here for one more winter after we finish this one. It is becoming much clearer to me now that we cannot manage this property for much longer. I had a wonderful, honest talk with my daughter, and she has encouraged us to move as well. She will not be as helpful to us in maintaining the property, which is because she has her own life to live, and I agree with that. That is to say, I can ask her for help, and if she can, I'm sure she will, but this cannot be her main focus. This only worked for my son because he had nothing else going on -- and that's not good for him either!
Time was short last night, so I only did an upper body weight training session. I will do lower body tonight. Wednesday will be the night off, and then I will start up again with Thursday and Friday. It was SO HARD to motivate myself to weight training, but I did it. I'm sticking to this part of the experiment.... for now.
Progress as of today: 56.5 lbs lost so far, only -6.5 lbs to go!
sorry about the snow...that's nuts!
Yesterday was just a bad day, and I did not cope well.
I follow 3 keto groups on Facebook. They are all run by the same moderators. One was keto focused, one was exercise, and one was fasting. Yesterday afternoon, I got kicked out of all 3 because I liked a comment from someone who complained that posts about cheating are defeating and triggering. I agree with that statement 100%. But that got me kicked out (banned), because that's not being supportive?
Right after this happened, we left to take my son to Chicago. It was an icy mix with blowing snow. I'm nervous enough driving towards the city even in good weather.
Got him settled, came home, and I guess the chaos of the day - mealtimes messed up due to "brunch", hormones, getting kicked out of 3 groups, saying good-bye to my son, and a conversation on the way back with husband about moving....
Anyway, it was too much, and I could not cope any more, and ate a lot to comfort myself. I knew what I was doing and why, and I didnt care. At least it was all keto friendly food, and afterwards, I was only full, not stuffed.
But definitely not my finest moment.
Progress as of today: 56.5 lbs lost so far, only -6.5 lbs to go!
don't take the internet personally. people on there tend to act mean when the computer is blocking you from actually seeing them in person.
at least today is a new day. not everyday is perfect :) i wish your son well!
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i just deleted my entire comment....will write it, AGAIN, at work.!
Horn_of_plenty on 02/22/2019:
i'm glad you went to the dr appt for a physical. I'm sure some of the dragging feeling is due to the anemia. I have a coworker with genetic issues affecting her being very anemic for life she's only 37. she doens't like to take iron because it impedes her digestion / elmination. one thing i notice is she does have hair loss and she's only 37 :( . there are prob things she can do to help it, but she's a very busy single mom and it's not her first priority i guess...
Horn_of_plenty on 02/22/2019:
but my fingers are crossed for you and i'm thinking warm thoughts. I def think you should look into the situation as you are further so that you can feel better.
i also am loving your switch to the higher dumbells. you can still do a 3rd set of your routine with the lower weights and do it slower to work on form and the slower pace will also make it more difficult and challenging, so it's another way to work things, if you still have that lighter set you can still make use of them right now...
i agree, the only wait to get better and improve is to remember you to push yourself at the next level. i also am moving up in weights for one of my lighter weights exercises. i'll write more of it later.
Horn_of_plenty on 02/22/2019:
i'm glad you got the weights in the other night instead of wasting time here and not getting a workout in.
and nice to hear Q bee's attitude bit her in the a$$$$$.
legcramps on 02/22/2019:
How unprofessional of Queen B! Really showing her true colors, isn't she?! Around here, you wouldn't get away with calling people names like that, that's bordering on harassment.
Very cool that you are moving up to the 15lb dumbbells! Progress! Also very impressed with your determination to keep going even though you weren't feeling like you were getting what you needed out of lifting heavier. Keep at it! Those results are coming!