A 2nd entry for Saturday, now that I have all of the cr&p from the work week out of my system....
It's getting kind of warm and quite humid here. I don't think we'll get much rain, though, unfortunately, but I'm still looking forward to this weekend.
I've got laundry started. I plan to go to the gym today... not sure about wearing a mask. I've been preparing myself to return to mask-wearing mentally. Maybe once school starts back up and everyone is sharing more germs indoors... Our schools start August 18th. Today is upper body weights. I'm not sure if Husband will come with me - I hope so. If not, I'm thinking about sitting in the hot tub.
I have progressed well in my reading for the webinar on Tuesday. There are 7 sections, and I have finished 4 of them. I am also starting to think ahead as to formulas and rules that I will need to know for the quiz. I'll defintely need to follow along and take notes during webinar - this isn't a "day off" by any means. But all I need is a 70% on the exam to renew my license. I have NO aspirations to do well other than to just pass. I want to sit down and jot some notes and calculations on some of the "discussion questions". I don't think we're graded on those, but would still like to have something down.
Eating has been going well. I've started to add fruit to my morning snack, either instead of or with the cup of chicken broth. IDK, I kind of feel like my breakfasts need to be more substantial, maybe? I seem to be following a pattern that I heard about on a PBS show I watched a couple of years ago -- sure do wish I could remember the name of the show. It was to show that "fasting" and the one-meal-a-day approach is best for optimal weight. But it's not technically "fasting". It's 2 lighter meals, and then a substantial meal.... yes, except that I do have snacks, fruit in the morning, and some kind of protein in the afternoon.
On a positive note, I did quite well with my goals yesterday. I had the jog outside, and I managed to take 2 breaks to recenter myself at work. I did forget to write down what I was grateful for, but I thought about it, and did say to myself what I was grateful for that day. So I will write it down today, for yesterday. I think it still counts. :-)
Progress as of today: 57.5 lbs lost so far, only -6 lbs to go!
Good morning!!! So glad to be home and not rushed this morning... I realized that because I ran out of time yesterday, I didn't write about some things that happened... IDK maybe they're not important or whatever, but the point is that I missed it. I was so tempted to log in and write a 2nd entry for Thursday but knew if I did that, I'd stay up too late, writing... and I still needed to read more for Tuesday's webinar and try to get to sleep at a decent hour.
On Thursday, the Boss pulled me into his office to ask me why I seemed so unhappy lately. He said, "I've noticed this, others here have noticed this." Um... who the hell is talking smack about Donkey??? His response: "that's not really where I was going with this..." (LOL) It felt relieving to discuss my Husband's recent health issues with the fatty liver disease. I didn't realize how hard that really hit me. I also mentioned that I'd been trying to follow the new diet, and it's been kind of difficult. I did NOT mention any of the personnel problems. That would do no good. And while my encounter with New Girl hit me very hard, that's not what really has been bothering me -- I won't give her that much power in my life.
A little thing, but quite a surprise to me: Husband said he's looking for maybe a workout partner or group at the gym. I'm not sure what that means. They don't have groups, but he says he's seen older men with issues that he'd like to pal up with, maybe. I get a little nervous at the idea of hiring a personal trainer, because of his spine/neck/hip issues. I'm not sure the trainers available have that level of knowledge to take on a client like Husband.
I had a slight tiff with Male Co-Worker yesterday. He missed something that I passed on to him, because it was his file, and he ended up making a $1000 mistake. Well, it's not my fault that you take vacation and come back and are so overwhelmed with files that you miss emails. And you didn't miss THIS email because you printed out the letter -- you just didn't read it. Again, not my fault. So what does he do? He starts asking New Girl to work on his files for him. And this is only because Mistakes Girl is now waaayyy too busy to help him. Um....
And then I go look on the calendar and see all of the upcoming time off he's taking in the upcoming months...
As I explained to Horn in a comment on my diary, the problem isn't taking time off. It's coming back to a mess with the files and not knowing where things left off, or having to correct others' mistakes or, worse, omissions -- things that got missed. Believe me, I'm going to have this problem on Wednesday, when I come back from taking a day "off" from the Continuing Ed webinar.... I guess I should anticipate working overtime., but I sure as heck won't coming in over the weekend to catch up -- like Male Co-Worker said he was doing this weekend (wife's out of town).
Bah - enough about work. It's Saturday -- why am I talking about WORK on a SATURDAY????
Progress as of today: 54 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
Lol, you and Happy are into these double entries ;)
YES. do not complain to boss about work...and do not give New Girl the satisfaction, please, don't....i KNOW this is hard. i have been in that plcae so many times with people abusing me verbally and acting like bullies in the workplace.
do you have a nearby indoor pool...(maybe with covid not a good idea)...but, there's a lot of aqua aerobics that older peolple do...it could be good for your hubby..., maybe he could still wear the mask and they move in the water but don't generally put heads under, i don't think, for aerobics.
you def pull your weight at work, compared to the others. is sure does seem you are the one that really gets things done. there's always one that is a great worker, seems you are the one in your office <3
The only gym with aqua therapy exercise classes is the one that we didn't join. It is affiliated with the hospital on the same campus. A couple of years ago, we signed up Husband for one of the classes, in their heated therapy pool. So it's warm like a hot tub (maybe not as hot) and feels wonderful, but it's an actual pool, not a hot tub.
Anyway, because we weren't members, he had to pay extra for the class. OUCH, but OK, fine if it helps. He went to 1 of 5 classes, I could NOT get him to go back. It was "old people", mostly women, he felt funny about being in the pool in his swimming suit, afraid he would slip and fall, etc. Never went back.
The gym we actually belong to (now, several years into the future), has 2 pools - indoor and outdoor - but does not offer aqua therapy classes. The gym is NOT affiliated with a hospital.
Now that I think about it, Husband used to be a competitive swimmer when he was in high school. Now, he never goes in the pool, like hardly ever. Even the hot tub is hard to get him into. I don't know if it's a body image thing or fear of slipping & falling. I can understand both of his concerns, totally.
This is short, because I'm short on time!
I just realized that my August goal of walking outside 1x a week won't work for the weekday mornings (my main intention, but not a requirement for the goal) won't work for me once school has started. I don't want anything to do with kids' bus stops, ****y moms, etc. So evenings or weekends or nothing.
This morning, though, I was out there, jogging around my neighborhood loop. That's about a mile. We'll see how my legs feel tomorrow! Mostly though, as I get older, I find that jogging/running aggravates my lower back & hips, which is why I don't jog much any more.
I pushed myself to do 2 leg weight exercises last night - one that I hate, and one that I really love.
Mistakes Girl is leaving today at 2:30pm so that she & her husband can take their camper up to Michigan for the weekend. I haven't had real time off since when?? And she's going off to Michigan??? WTF...
Progress as of today: 54 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
As far as jogging, I think I'm limited to 1x a week maybe, so I'm glad that I'm not in love with it. I don't really run. It's more of a trot at best, as most donkeys do...
I can understand you changing the goal as not to have issues or aggravation at bus stops. got you completely.
nice job on the jog! if you can mix it with walk and not push too much too soon, it may be just want your body is wanting.
nice job on the legs last night. if i would just do legs 3x a week, which i don't, i could develop really nice improvements. i am not up to that tho. It's too many requirements that i find stressful so i'm at usually 2x a week, for now...i will have to go about it different for that 3rd time. not important to think further about now..
I feel you can take your days off when you want just let the boss know in advance. honestly, 1x off here and there shouldn't make your boss or you blow a fuse! if you want a day, you should consider it and just let boss know 1-2 weeks in advance if you really feel you need it....that's my opinion. not sure how it'll actually play out for you or if it could, but that's my thoughts.
and i agree with Bear completely about mistakes girl heading to her state!
I'd love to change up my weight routine -- not so much the exercises, but rather the schedule -- but just not sure how or where to start. A big part of the problem is that I have work as a huge consumption of my energy, so that this never gets to be something that I have the energy to explore.
The problem with taking days off isn't taking the time off -- at least for me, because I don't abuse that -- but rather coming back to twice as much work, things done wrong, not knowing where things left off, not knowing how to answer clients, agents, attorneys...
MARIA -- I hope you and your husband are OK!!!
Happy - thinking of you this morning... You sounded so defeated in your last post. (((hugs)))
My alarm woke me out of a sound sleep this morning. Oh I miss those mornings of waking up before 5am naturally. I had to drag myself out of bed, too. Well, at least it's Thursday, although I have to contend with New Girl this afternoon. I think I'm going to go with an avoidance strategy today. I'm just too busy at work to deal with her issues.
I felt like almost every email was attacking me yesterday. I took a morning break (vesper) and went outside to breathe deeply, zone out, and do a couple of neck stretches. I missed my afternoon break -- that seems to be a lot harder for me to remember to take. I snooze the alarm 3 times, with the intention of "just finishing up" and then I forget. The morning break helped though.
I was able to come home not too late, and had a lovely dinner with my husband. I felt energized, and ALMOST went for a jog (or at least a walk) around my neighborhood loop, but then chores got in the way. I did ride my bike, though, so that's good. I realized that I forgot to write down 1 thing I was grateful for last night. Oh my... I got caughter up in reading for the Continuing Ed class, until I almost started nodding off.
I have put away the box of chocolates last night. I had 1 (not 2!) and then moved the box to an inconvenient place. I will still have a little something after dinner, but not those chocolates.
I want to work on focusing more on my life, rather than be consumed with the drama at work. Just need to keep my mouth shut as much as possible, and work. Hard to do with a Boss who doesn't want to do anything but chat and go out to lunch.
Progress as of today: 54 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
great job on your weight, it's much earned and deserved...you've been working on it for a long time and you decided now is the time to really take that action.
Also great job in your weight training yesterday. I have been trying to stick with my sessions also, esp during the week, because it stinks when you lose the strength and you have to constantly backtrack to build yourself up again....I may go and buy a 1-45# dumbell just for bicep curls as sometimes i can curl a lot with the 1-40# i have.
Whoa, 40# -- Now that's impressive!!!! I'm going to try a 20# the next time I'm at the gym, and see if maybe I could do 25#...
On BTN days, I try to at least work with lighter weights, to maintain progress already made. Like you said, it sucks to lose one's progress.
...you've got to distract yourself more i think from that mentality.
regarding two chocs after dinner, that is nothing compared to a slice of cake. i sometimes have more than one choc also...i would like to later limit it to one, but if you had a great day, 1 more choc will not ruin it.
I take it you work for attorneys who specialize in real estate contacts? Is that all?
I mentioned to him yesterday that if he's not going to get to these, that he stop taking on these types of clients. We've got 2 clients that want their documents NOW, and we just lost a 3rd one, because they weren't satisfied with the time it was taking and the quality of the product :-(
Yesterday went better, although the morning didn’t feel all that great. When I have higher sleep scores on the FitBit, I wake up feeling worse. I slept 7 hours and had a score of 91. Didn’t wake up early naturally, though, and it was tough getting out of bed. I had a headache for most of the morning, even though I took Tylenol and a decongestant. However, I was not the only one at work complaining about allergies… So IDK.
And you’re keeping up with the exercises! I am so impressed.
Feeling very annoyed this morning. I'm running very short on time. I keep getting interrupted while trying to post here. I didn't check my sleep score but I don't feel like I got good sleep. Lights out at 9:31p which is good. Woke up to Daughter making noise at 1:15am, and struggled to fall back to sleep. I sure do miss those recent days when I was waking up naturally at 4:42am.
Well, New Girl did it to me again yesterday -- arguing with me for me to take phone calls that aren't for me. In fact, I think I won this one, because the phone call was actually something SHE should have addressed, but she's just so eager to pass phone calls off... I wanted to make it very clear to her, nicely, that most of the phone calls that are "for me", aren't really for me. I'm thinking maybe just voice mails, and then I go back and write messages and give them to the people the calls were really for. A little more work, but it might be a better process overall.
Yoga last night was a good stretch. It was hard to rest for the remainder of the day. I felt like doing more cardio, but I've learned, recently, that it's very important to honor my rest day. So I ended up doing a little more cardio this morning, minimal upper body weights --- I'm hoping to have the motivation to do more this evening.
Male Co-Worker comes back today, and New Girl won't be back until Thursday, so today should be OK.
Progress as of today: 54 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
Nice yoga workout!
Happy Monday!!! Well, not really, LOL.... I don't want to go to work today. Male Co-Worker is supposed to be out today - it will be interesting to see if he really does take the day off, or if he decides he's done with the break and comes back. He did that the last time he took days off that weren't vacation-trip involved. Either way won't affect me. Not today. I just hope there aren't too many new contracts.
I started reading the packet for my Continuing Ed webinar. I'm so glad that I did. I don't need to KNOW the material right now, but just having an idea of what will be covered will be helpful, and some of it is interesting to me, in fact. If I finish the packet, I may go back and try to jot down some answers to the final discussion questions. I might do some highlighting too, but right now, I'm just going over the material, so that I know what will be covered. There are 7 sections, and I finished the 1st one yeserday. I can do this.
I went to the gym with Husband yesterday. We each did our own thing, and this time, pretty much finished up at the same time. No waiting on my part, but that would have been OK, too, since I had my phone with me. I did lower body weights, and I wouldn't call it spectacular, but did what I set out to do. Also, 20 minutes on the elliptical. I used the 20lb dumbbells for squats. Could not feel any difference this morning.
My car is in the shop, so Husband will be taking me to work, so that he can have his car during the day if he needs it. I'm hoping that my daughter will pick me up from work, but if not, then Husband will come get me, unless the car is ready ahead of schedule. Yoga tonight, so no evening bike ride. Looking forward to a good stretch. :-)
Progress as of today: 54 lbs lost so far, only -2.5 lbs to go!
Admire your consistency in weight training. I am such a flake!
Hope the car is ok.
I'll be completely honest with you: it's hard to keep motivated with the weights. But I am determined.
except i was teased royally but someone i do not work for, but with. he's the general foreman of all the electricians. like the highest up. he's been with the company 40 years! yes! since he was around 21. now, he's 61. crazy! he is smart and good at what he does. he's teasing me (i hope!) telling me not to take so much time off. well,i am going to do what i want to do. i will speak to MY main boss tomorrow to make sure i'm OK. i do not owe people explanations of why i should be able to take the days i have accrued and are mine to take....he might literally make 4-5x my salary. some things aren't fair. and i'm not about to come to work on vacation days that should have been. i can actually see what he makes, should have done the math last time...i will look into it when i can, obviously i have to be careful. it's actually easy to see on the computer. should be interesting to see. he's on the time sheets that are checked. as his salary isn't really special, but he is paid a little extra OT religiously as part of his salary.
you'll be set even by just reading thru the package as most people will not beforehand. it's good you do, you'll feel better about it when the course is going on and taking of those review tests.
nice job doing squats with extra weight. that's a lot of weight. did you hold both, so that you were squatting an extra total of 40#? that's good! you can also maybe hold a kettlebell with both hands when squatting.
have a nice stretch. i have a feeling that later on in life, like a decade?, i'll be doing more yoga or stretching also. i already stretch a bit during the day...just a little, but i always do a little something. it feels good.
For the dumbbell squats, I had 20# in each hand (both hands?). I didn't realize I was squatting with 40 pounds - right!
You will find towards your late 40s that things like flexibility and balance suddenly become more important. I never gave a 2nd thought to either of these when I was in my 30's. I kind of wish I had, or at least gotten started earlier on with the yoga.
Going to the gym with hubby sounds nice. It's actually rare to see couples in the gym... I always wished for something like that but if I wanted to be 100% honest, I'd go with my partner just fine but I'd prefer working out separately. I really need my own music at my own pace and own terms. It's my alone time and I don't like interruptions. Sometimes people come to me to talk and I really hate that... I'm VERY social but EXTREMELY antisocial when I'm focusing on myself (aka working out).
Still, I do consider it a "together" thing. I think it'd be much harder on us as a couple, if we were REALLY into working out together-together, and then one of us couldn't because of illness or injury.
I feel much better today. Thank you all for your helpful comments and positive thoughts. If nothing else, I realize that I need to focus on my mental health as much as my physical health, so I will add this to my monthly goals for August.
Yesterday at the gym was OK. I did what I had to do and came straight home. No steam room, no shower, just came home, which for yesterday was fine.
Oh my gosh, Husband is in such a chatty mood this morning... I'm finding it hard to write here or even concentrate on anything, because he's just chatting on and on and on.... Am I at work? Is my Boss here?
I have the gym planned for today; I'm not sure if Chatty Hubby will come with me or not. I would prefer a quick session again, but if he wants to come along, I'd much rather see him get out and have exercise than not. If he comes along, I will accommodate.
I'm thinking that we're heading towards wearing masks again... Hey, if it keeps stores, gyms, businesses, schools open - let's all wear masks. I'm completely OK with a mask if it keeps people working and living. Some stores are asking people to wear masks again. The gym hasn't done that yet, but I think it's just a matter of time. Again, if it keeps us open, let's do it.
Finishing up some extra laundry and I hope to read over some of the Continuing Ed packet today. Relaxing for the week ahead...
AFTERNOON EDIT: Updated August goals, in bold.
August Goals:
Ordered some bright turquoise N95s from Amazon. Tight fit & that’s what. you want.
I feel like I'm holding my breath, waiting to see... Huge debates about the school district's policy on masks. Unfortunately I live around a lot of ignorant people.
2. I have not been tested for ADHD. It was not an issue when I was in school.
3. True. And I wonder if my 95 sleep score last night is why I'm feeling much, much better today.
5. Thank you. It helps to know I'm not alone in feeling that way.
6. I'm OK with the paper masks and cloth masks that I own. I'm even OK with double-masking, if we get to that point. I had not heard about the covering-hair part. There is a box of face shields at work, too, if we get to that point.
Normally, I'm OK with his chattiness, because it takes me off the hook, but if I'm trying to do something - like write here on DD - or if he's meandering in the topic, then it gets annoying.
already, where i work, it is attached to a government job, so as contractors for a government job, men on the job (the electricians), but all wear masks (they actually haven't even taken that enforcement down for all of covid...)...but now if you aren't vaccinated, you will need at least a weekly test and to wear a mask...in my trailer there's a guy not vaccinated, i see him doing the mandatory weekly test but i do not see him wearing a mask all day...we'll see what happens. he is def not getting the shot, he said.
compared to in the past, i feel your goals are more attainable..i think you will be able to reach them easier this month. not easy per se, just more attainable.
glad you get to the gym. i sure miss the gym; but it doesn't work for me anymore time-wise. perhaps another time; but i do like my home workouts once i get into them! :)
On the other hand, I kind of do like to be around other people, even if we're not "together". It's fun to watch other people lift weights and such, watching everyone work towards their goals.
Yes, I am grateful that I can go to the gym.
GOOD MORNING!!!! It sure does feel good to not be at work. I'm so glad to be at home.
I want to be completely honest with you. I'm currently struggling to keep myself out of sliding further into a depression. Thursday's work drama really threw me down a well of despair, and I'm working to crawl my way out. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm trying to shake off the residual feelings of sadness and regret. Part of it is that I'm still trying to figure out where I go from here, and this is happening (a good step in the right direction). I also know that I won't feel 100% until after TOM is over (so there is an end in sight, not hopeless; another good step). Finally, until I can get some decent sleep, things may be a little rough,.
I've had 2 epiphanies that I think are game-changers in trying to feel better:
So I will be spending today focusing on formulating my August goals. I'm looking forward to my son coming home in August for an extended visit. I'll see my mom at the end of the month, too. I'll be working on transitioning from weight loss to maintenance. I don't have any athletic goals, but I want to continue to grow in my weight training.
July Goals - RECAP:
I'm glad to be home today, too.
I'm glad you noticed that about New Girl. she seems to have a strong personality and she may have noticed that you are a type which she can speak to with some force and not worry about backlash. i don't know.
but please, do not start to overthink your actions at work to the point of extra stress. part of being new is learning to work with the existing staff. i just cannot believe that she is so perfect and you are so lacking. think about it.
we can always improve; perhaps it's true you can sound stressed or a certain way on the phone that she says; or in person to her; but honestly, you are also a good worker. just don't go doubting yourself and your abilities after this huge negative statement she made to your face. this woman has some guts. for instance, like i was saying sorta before; i doubt you'd just come out and say to her something of that nature. the way you did react was pretty darn nice and open-minded based on what you wrote in your entry previous.
i suggest you focus on always being your best self, but not second guessing yourself either. this woman is new and has to prove herself yet.
just stay professional with her...and do your work. it'll be good if your work doesn't overlap and she's doing things she does; and your work is things you do..
but really, most beaches we went to do not have many options. this one did. we may not go back, it has awesome popcorn shrimp i could have gotten and eaten with my cherry tomatoes. i am not sad i didn't have it, though.
no biggie :)
this is the one that loves thai food and the one restaurant only. i did suggest we may eat at the beach for dinner; but, she wasn't going with my suggestion lol. she wanted to order her usual spring rolls and chicken fried rice.
also, once we were almost at jones beach, i had asked if her free pass included another beach a little farther away (but happens to be exactly the way we were driving, just 17 miles away once she looked without any traffic bc we'd passed all of the traffic)...she was ready to fight me that i couldn't drive more and i'd "promised her" we were going to the one beach and that she should have lied to me and want to the beach alone if i were going to change the plans at the last minute...
i ended up of course driving to where we had plans and not further. there are some things she did that annoyed the heck out of me yesterday. this woman def has even less patience than ever (something that comes iwth lifestyle and age....).
i was driving about 5 minutes from my apt home with our food after the beach and she's in the car...there's a city bus that has it's blinker on to get back into the lane after picking passengers up and i slow down saying i'll let the bus in....she answers "why do you have to stop for this bus....i'm hungry and want to eat...." i was like, this isn't even slowing us down by a whole minute...
she wasn't down for much walking; could hardly deal with any push to do anything.
she also told me she'd like to go to the far beach, fire island, that includes a ferry...i def do not see that happening as she hardly lasted yesterday and that was leaving late for the beach and just staying 3 hours; less than we usually do (which worked great, actually!) :)
i'm just saying, she doesn't know this about herself; but she isn't getting any easier to hang out with.
she doesn't realize how much i like change and new experiences. i had been to this beach many times; she had never. she loved the part of the beach i took her to - she had only been to a part of this beach with no restaurants or ammenities. the only reason we even went to the new part is because i knew where the parking was.
it's hard to be with someone who isn't open to much new in life...
i know i'm negative.
i also know i'm allowed to have my limits, which is why i KNOW i'm not driving out to go to ferries and to an old spot that for me has nothing new or interesting to offer this year. she has to realize that it cannot be all the same for me; just as for her it cannot be all new...
missing having friends nearby that are up to more exciting things; so will just do also what makes me happy as I have been this summer. :)
all is good, just ranting on your page. and knowing i will have to make choices for me; and not be roped into her negativity of thinking i'm trying to change pllans on her when it's more i'm into new experiences. she won't be able to rope me into doing whatever she wants; when it's a long ass trip and she cannot even survive a short one. she forgets so easy what it's like to work all summer...and why i'm not into waking up so early on a saturday after a long week of work. and while she wont' experience it; i won't have to do anything i really do not want to do. i don't owe her that type of favor if it gives me stress.
What you wrote: It's hard to be with someone who isn't open to much new in life... <<<that really has me thinking, because I completely agree with you, and I also feel like I could go down that path. I'm that sort of person who gets stuck in her habits, and I'm also a person who tends to see the negative before the positive.
I think she's a good lesson to us all, on how not to get stuck in a negative life to live.
lol.
i'm sorry i ranted up your page; but, it's funny how i can only take her in smaller doses and year after year...that's how it will be.
she will retire as soon as she is able, i do not doubt, as she said it to me. her lifestyle is so far from mine, at times she doesn't realize it...she will not force me to jump through her hoops and restrictions.
like you've said, this is why i have other friends.
It will be interesting to see how she does with retirement. One thing I didn't mention above, but that I do recognize (and so do you) is that she has her limits, and they are very... limited. And like you wrote, you have your limits too (boundaries) and won't allow yourself to go through hoops to accommodate hers. That's a very helpful perspective, for yourself. You could really twist yourself up trying to fit your life into hers, to maintain a friendship.
i was thinking you may be able to relate to me also because your hubby is compromised with what he can do; which can be a challenge when you want to do more. i guess at times he will need to be patient or sit and relax while you continue on walks anywhere you may go on vacation, etc.
I was *very* aware that what you wrote could apply more to him - not so much that he doesn't *want* to try new things, but that he *can't*. I realize that we are running out of time to do things together. He thinks maybe 3 or 4 more years of useful mobility until he becomes significantly LESS mobile. Not a happy thought.
However, I know that he is 100% supportive of things that I want to try or goals that I might have for myself. That is to say, as long as the goal or thing is within reason and in my best interest (e.g. not illegal, overly dangerous, etc.).
In this respect, I think we are very well suited for each other.
Yesterday was an awful day... It shouldn't have been. I left a little early, after the office area got too hot to work in, and I left my workload in a good place, pretty much caught up. But I had a confrontation with a co-worker (more detail below) and that started cascading on my emotions. Add TOM hormones and coming home knowing that we'd have a surprise guest at dinner -- I HATE SURPRISES -- just put me into a tailspin.
However, being an emotional mess is good for weight-loss. I didn't eat much dinner - burger and some slices of grilled eggplant -- and not much cake and ice cream >>> not NEARLY the amount I have been fantasizing about. The cake was not really cake! It was mostly "chocolate truffle" filling -- kind of looked like cheesecake, but it was not cheesecake. Bleah... and I think because it was so chocolatey, the mint ice cream didn't taste right with it. I also didn't feel comfortable topping off the ice cream with chocolate chips, because we had company. So not nearly the damage done that I had initially anticipated.
Also being an emotional mess, though, I did not do any more lower body weights at home in the evening. I excused myself early from the company, went downstairs to the basement, and hopped on my bike and kind of disappeared into my mind, while "watching" something on TV.
UGH, then a deluge of happy birthday phone calls.... And you'll understand why I felt this way about hearing from family, but why on earth does everyone have to talk so much? Talk talk talk talk talk.... All the time. At work, at home... About nothing, just blah blah blah...
So New Girl came up to me yesterday and said that she doesn't like my tone of voice and that we're going to have problems working together. I have struggled with modulating my tone of voice many, MANY times in my adult life, in many jobs, many relationships. I just have that salty, sarcastic way of speaking, I guess. That is one main reason why I started pulling back from talking to people on the phone. I don't do well talking on the phone, I don't hear well on the phone, I don't like talking on the phone... And at work, most of the time, it's not me that the people calling need to talk to. Most of the time, they need to talk to either one of the attorneys or Male Co-Worker. NOT ME.
I invited New Girl to sit down and talk about this (ha ha). I explained that most of the calls aren't really for me, people just don't know who else to ask for. I also explained that my tone of voice has been an issue for a very long time, and I try to work on it, but it gets really exasperating when people call and ask for me, even when I specifically say, "Email me or call to speak to the attorney". I told her that I really liked her (not any more!) and I thought she was doing a good job. I said I would try to work on the tone of voice, but that it really has nothing to do with her individually or specifically. It's just how I am. I think things were OK after that, but wow, what a kick in the head.
So here I am 51 years old, still working on the same issues over and over and over....
Progress as of today: 53.5 lbs lost so far, only -2 lbs to go!
I think a LOT of it is a focus problem. I get so bombarded with calls and emails and office chatter that I develop like a "tunnel vision" to just get through everything as fast as I can, and I get very stressed, very impatient.
Then I don't focus on customer service, tone of voice, etc. This is also how mistakes happen, and I told New Girl this. I cannot continue to be interrupted by calls because then I get nothing done and that which gets done has mistakes. I will say that she did appear to be understanding and sympathetic about that.
awww, Happy Bday to you :) why didn't you write it was your bday full out! haha. that's really nice they called you; i see that the long calls can be difficult on a work night; after a long day. i can relate.
ONCE AGAIN, HAPPY BDAY TO YOU!!
at the company i am at, new people have to seriously WATCH THEMSELVES. look at what happened to me - with the most evil payroll lady. her tone of voice is a disgrace. she is so rude. and she gets away with it.
new girl has pushed you and punched you in the face with her comment. i feel it was extremely harsh to say to you.
i would take her comment with a huge grain of salt. i'm surprised she would outwardly say she's going to have a difficult time working with you.
you aren't the new girl, she is.
work to maintain your confidence.
if she ever says something like that again, tell her if it's not work related; you'd prefer not to discuss bc your idea of work is to work to get along; not tell people you don't think you can work with them!?
idk, but ignore that.
she's new and that's the right way to talk to someone. i don't agree with how she dealt with it. and if she was being totally honest and not sarcastic or joking; how can you tell someone you dont think you can work with them bc of their tone of voice? i feel she didn't use the right approach with you.
don't take it to heart. keep being you. you've lasted a long time...do not apologize to HER. she needs to find her place at work and work with people. her comment isn't kind to you. think how she'd react if someone said that to her.
I *DO* hear what you're saying, and you can bet that I'll be doing a lot of thinking this weekend.
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Good to get going on the studying...will give you plenty of time to go over it again before that day. It will be nice when you can put that behind you.
So nice when it's done. And this year, I won't have to scramble at the end of the year to get it done.
Frankly, though, I just wanted time away from the office, even if it's doing this crap.
Jacky82020 on 08/07/2021:
Dang! You’re surpassed your goal! Congratulations.
Keep an eye on me, though, because that number will fluctuate. It's just too darn easy to regain.
Horn_of_plenty on 08/07/2021:
I did comment below, too.
because of the news and the high numbers of cases back to the amounts in our country overall last winter, i'm back to wearing my mask indoors in my apt building, while doing laundry, and in the elevator (indoor public spaces). i think it's more down south, but the cases of covid are increasing everywhere :(
you are preparing well for your continued ed and i'm rooting for you!
i cannot do no snacking days either. my blood sugars get too low, i get too hungry, and it doesn't work out.
really nice job on your weight goal. it's due to your hard work. remember this, that you truly are capable and i'm very proud of you that you can enjoy the rewards.
I appreciate that you've mentioned that my success is because of my hard work. It helps to be reminded of this. This morning, I was feeling sorry for myself, because I'm not naturally this way -- I have to work at it, ever mindful, always, it seems.
BUT I'm guessing that I'm not alone by any means. Most folks with fitness physiques probably have to work at it -- hard.