This just ain't good. My weight is going up and up and up. The harder I work at it, the more it goes up.
Don't tell me that I'm gaining muscle. I don't CARE if I'm gaining muscle. I still wear a size 12 (I'm 5'3"). I can't wear a ladies' Medium without feeling it's too small. I HATE BEING SHORT YET BIG!!! What the hell good is muscle if it makes you big?
Progress as of today: 9.5 lbs lost so far, only 4.5 lbs to go!
I had a job interview today. So one would hope that my morning would be as stress-free as possible so that I would be calm and collected for the interview. NOT. My mp3 player didn't work, so I was late to the gym because I spent 30 minutes trying to figure out what was wrong with it. I get to the gym, and the TV is set to an informercial about a steam cleaner vacuum cleaner. So I had to get the guy at the front desk and ask him to change the channel. Then, because I had no music of my own, I had to spend 65 minutes listening to big hair metal bands on the overhead music that the gym pipes in.
Get home from the gym to shower. Hubby is in the shower. Great. Kids are bickering, etc. Oh yes, nothing like a nice calm morning before a job interview.
Now I am going to "relax" by going over to the grade school and volunteer for an hour with the second grade class. (I totally forgot that I was signed up to help today, so my daughter doesn't know I'm coming today!!! I love to surprise her like this!!!) :-)
Progress as of today: 12 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!
I like that you went to the gym and worked through the craziness...especially on your interview day! :)
your tips on the past few comments have been helpful! :)
i've been applying at getting my butt in gear to plan for September 2008.
I'm ready to face the music. 132.0 this morning. Moving on...
My whole day today was so whacky. It was a near miracle I made it to the gym at all.
First, I'm at the gym at 5:30a, 20 minutes into my 65 min elliptical workout when I remembered that I forgot to leave Husband money for milk for his breakfast at work (whoever gets money out of the ATM splits the cash between the 2 of us). I knew he would be so pissed if I forgot, so I left after 25 minutes.
Then I had to remain at home because we had a guy coming over to give us an estimate on how much it would be to fix our leaky basement wall. Turns out, I could have fixed it for free, because HUSBAND left the hose running outside for something like 2 weeks. Maybe 3. So the ground was soaked and it finally had nowhere to go but into the cement of the foundation. Great. So now it DOES have to be fixed because once water starts leaking into a basement, the water "remembers" the path it took to the walls. We will have leakage / seepage every time it rains now. Great.
Then I remembered that I wanted to surprise my daughter (7yrs old) at school today. She was Star Student this week, and one of the perks is that you get to have lunch with your parent if they can. When I learned of this on last Friday, I kind of gave an expression of exasperation. As in "Don't count on it" knowing full well that I would try to manage it if I could. And so I met her at lunch and she was so surprised :-)
After lunch I went to the gym and did more cardio (my full hour in addition to the 25 minutes I did this morning) and then an abbreviated but total weight training routine. I need to change my weight training routine this month. It's getting old.
Oh, and I have a job interview on Tuesday morning. THAT I found out about at 8a this morning as I was brushing my teeth.
Progress as of today: 12 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!
Where have ya been!!! I miss reeding your entries! I hope all is well! :)
BYE for now! :) :) :)
OCTOBER RECAP:
Well, I did not reach my goal weight of 130lb by October 31st. For one thing, my eating took a tanker over the weekend.
Let me interrupt myself by telling you all very urgently: DO NOT BINGE ON PUMPKIN SEEDS. If you do, plan to be in the bathroom for long periods of time the following day.
So despite 3 days of really bad eating, I managed to weigh in at 131.5 today. I am thankful for that.
I do not consider this month to be a failure for myself even though I did not reach my goal weight. I continued to run regularly. I did over 200 miles of cardio (only 9 of them were on a bike). I did over 2000 minutes of cardio this month. I wish I had been able to do more weight training, and I can see that I need to have more of a balance between the cardio and weight training if I want to get my body into the shape that I want (without liposuction). I also managed not to binge for most of the month (until this past weekend, in fact).
So now all I have to do is survive all this candy crap that will be coming into the house tonight for Trick or Treating. I have decided to take pro-active steps to prevent myself from bingeing on candy. It is THEIR candy after all. Nothing is more disgusting to me than eating all of your kids' Halloween candy. Even cat's hemorrhoids is not as disgusting to me as doing that.
Progress as of today: 12.5 lbs lost so far, only 1.5 lbs to go!
WTG!!! What amazing stats youhave for the month!!! Your going to need a new name, you certainly are NOT a donkey, or a ponkey-butt for that matter!! You go girl!
Exercise: 65 min elliptical (intervals) + 35 stationary bicycling (6.43 miles); Weight training: Upper & Lower Body (machines); Calories: 1746
I did all my weight training today because tomorrow Husband has a follow-up doctor's appointment, and I think I'd like to go with him for that. Just to hear if it really is Crohn's disease or what. I plan to go to the gym early (like I did today) and then run outside after the doctor's appointment, probably the 4-mile route.
I also applied for a job today. It was painful, but it is for the best for my family. I cannot have my life centering around the gym. (Plus, maybe I can eventually get to the point where I'm saving up $ for some liposuction on my thighs, knees and hips. I am now convinced that surgery is the only way I will attain the body that I want.)
It looks like it will be a higher calorie day today, because I had chili for lunch (man, that has a lot of calories in it!). However, that is ok, and I will try my hardest not to go over my limit.
EVENING EDIT: Went 6 calories over my limit, but I was very active today, so I am totally ok with it. What put me over? Having a cup of coffee after dinner. I had a lot of salty things to eat today, so tomorrow I must focus on drinking plenty of water.
Progress as of today: 13 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!
I think your nerves being jangled about getting a job is perfectly understandable...after all, you've been a SAHM and it isn't easy to jump back into the work (outside of the home) thing. Good luck with it! And given your motivation, you'll still find time for the gym LOL
Anyway, it was just a thought! Good luck on your job search! :)
Sunday:
You would not believe how much crap I have eaten in the past 2 days. I'm totally stressing out about this job situation, and I'm sabotaging my diet. I think in the back of my mind, I'm thinking that if I still have weight to lose that I won't have to find a job or change my routine/life. How illogical is that?
Today I know will be better because I am going to the gym (I always do better on gym days). I just hope I didn't do too much damage. I can kiss my hopes of reaching goal by Halloween (Oct. 31) good-bye though. This I"m pretty sure of. :-(
EVENING EDIT: As I predicted, today was much better. For one thing, I erased all doubt about the job situation as I have made up my mind that this is what needs to come to pass. Tomorrow I am turning in my job application.
Also, I went to the gym and did the elliptical and ran on the treadmill. Cardio always makes me feel better, but I have to wonder if I"m not getting addicted. So another good thing about getting a job will be that it will put my gym time into better perspective.
I don't know if the job thing will work out but it sure will be exciting to see where it takes me. What doesn't kill Donkey only makes her stronger.
Progress as of today: 13 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!
Exercise: 65 min elliptical (double hill); Weight training: 15 min lower body (machines); Calories: TBD -- but they will be high today
Well...........
What else can I say or do? Once again, my goal weight eludes me. This is what happened. I weighed myself this morning and the scale said 132.0. No loss. Then I weighed myself again and it went down to 131.0. WTF. So then I brushed out my hair and put it in a ponytail and weighed myself again: 131.0. So that's what I'm reporting.
BUT -- I was so hoping for 130.0. Ya know, for ONCE, I would just like to see that number (well, not just for once, because I want to keep it there, but...) and say "look at me, I reached my goal". Today that did not happen. Stupid ovulation....
I have also been stressing out about another issue. Now that I am coming to the end of my weight loss and focusing more on maintenance. And now that my family is moved and settled, I need to find a job. I have a couple of options, but I find that I do not really want to go back to work.
So you might think, "stay home if it makes you happy" but we could use the extra money right now (especially with the holidays coming up and my stupid cat needing a dental cleaning w/possible extractions). And there are things that I want to save up for too, items or services that I would like to save up for and purchase.
PLUS, I think some of my reluctance to return to work is linked to my fear or anxiety about the unknown. Change always scares me. So it's hard for me to know if I don't want to work, or if it's just the fear getting in the way.
And where do I get off not wanting to work and not doing it? I mean, this life ain't no free ride, right? Wouldn't most people rather have free time than to go to a job? Of course they would, so I know that my staying at home days need to come to an end soon. I just need a push out the door, ya know? Life isn't about going to the gym all day. It can't be. It shouldn't be.
Progress as of today: 13 lbs lost so far, only 1 lbs to go!
Exercise: 65 min elliptical (gluteal w/reduced ramp) + 69 min running (6.0 mi); Weight Training: None; Calories: 1520
Tomorrow is weigh-in!!! I don't hold high hopes. I gain weight about 2 weeks from AF/TOM. Damn uterus.
Progress as of today: 12 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!
Well, actually I'm always glad I'm not a man. They say that we're strange, but I think it's the other way around. Maybe I just wish Eve hadn't eaten that damned apple. ;)
Exercise: 65 min elliptical (single hill); Weight training: 20 min upper body (machines); Calories: 1827 (I think)
Just setting this up for now. Had a snack of a go-gurt and a big honey crisp apple -- I have so much sugar going through me right now, it's almost intoxicating, and it probably would be if I didn't feel sick to my stomach! Oof! PMS has arrived! Stupid hormonal cravings. I hold no high hopes for weigh-in this week. So much for reaching my goal by Halloween. :-(
EVENING EDIT: I go over my calories if I have a Fiber One chocolate and oats bar. I don't go over if I have nothing. This is so hard. I've been looking forward to that bar all day, but I will go over by nearly 90 calories if I do. Oh what a dilemma....
Progress as of today: 12 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!
Thanks for the question. I use a vita-mix blender which is able to break up the green leafy vegetables to a nice smooth pulp. I make sure to not throw anything out, that way I get plenty of fiber....trust me there is no lack of fiber, lol.
I am personally uncomfortable at this weight. It's killing me. Also, I refuse to buy bigger clothes so right now everything I wear is skin tight.
Exercise: 35 min elliptical (resis. 14) + 40 min running on treadmill; Weight training: push-ups and crunches (hopefully); Calories: 1420
My Husband's colonoscopy was successful and we have some answers, but not the ones we thought we would hear. No polyps, no obstructions. So it was pretty good news. I think the doctor is leaning towards Crohn's. He took some samples and ordered some tests. Will know more in a week when Husband has follow-up appointment.
I did not realize how stressed out I was about the whole procedure until we got home from the hospital. I told the kids we would carve pumpkins tonight if we didn't go to Tae Kwon Do, but I am *tired*. Feel just wiped out.
Progress as of today: 12 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!
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If you are gaining muscle, you should still lose in inches. Muscle weighs more than fat s0 - say 5# of muscle is going to take up less space than 5# of fat so your clothes would fit looser. Are you logging everything that you eat? Every bite and swallow? You may be getting more calories than you think if you aren't. How did the interview go??
jon'smom on 11/09/2007:
I know muscle is important, but I agree with you. It doesn't look good on all of us. For some people muscle tones them up, but for the rest of us it makes us look like we have tree stumps for legs. Hang in there, we will figure something out:)
Maria7 on 11/09/2007:
Usually exercise is slimming unless 'bulking' exercises are done.
Horn_Of_Plenty on 11/10/2007:
hmmm. this is strange. how are your calories? do you watch them carefully and calculate EVERYTHING you eat and DRINK? also, in order to stretch your muscles and joints or maybe just to take a break from what you've been doing, you may want to try something like pilates or yoga. This might help you refocus into weight loss. If not that, try weight training. Women who weight train usually have a easier time maintaining and loosing weight.
greengirl on 11/10/2007:
Donkey, I cant explain what is happening to you but I know sometimes life just aint fair. Its a bummer.Try to keep your spirits up, girl. You have been so good :)
hollybelle on 11/11/2007:
Keep on doing the right things and you will get the desired results. Unless ou are really doing some weight trainig you probably aren't building that much muscle. It may be temporary water weight????Which can come from so many sources. How was the interview?
workingit2 on 11/14/2007:
Maybe go to the doctor for a checkup? God knows I sure found out more than I bargined for but it did answer a lot of questions. Not saying there is anything wrong with you, it may very well be just a normal period of water retention as a result of the increased fitness and maybe decreased hydration. Whatever it is,I hope you find peace soon because I know how maddning it can be to the mind. :(
borntocry on 11/14/2007:
Hmm. How do you know it's muscle? Could you be pregnant?! Have you been keeping track of your calories and if so, what's your average calorie intake per day? You shouldn't be getting too bulky, even if you're weight training intensively. Are you? I don't remember exactly what your workout routine is but I seem to remember more cardio than weight-lifting, and that really shouldn't cause you to bulk up.