I think I am getting sick. I am hoping this right now is as bad as I get. I could live with that. This started with a dry cough and then evolved into some sneezing, and now I have a headache and fatigue. The cough has not left. Fortunately, it's only occassional, but I can feel it in my chest and throat, which is how I know it's something, rather than nothing.
Didn't notice until now that I have some muscle soreness in my arms from last night's weights. It was a short workout, did what I wanted to do. I don't know about doing push-ups tonight... I'll try.
Speaking of push-ups, today was a re-test day for my son and he still did not pass. He has to have perfect form or they do not count, and some of them get a little sloppy at the end of a minute. *sigh* He told my husband that he is working out with a few friends now that are in his same exact position and he has access to weights. So he has another week to train. Having him pass will be such a relief...
In spite of this stress, I have not chewed on my fingernails (yet). I wore rings today too, but I took them off before typing this up. I might give it another try, but you know... I think I'm just not a ring person. Also, I don't think I'm a fancy fingernail person either. This conflict -- between who I want to be versus what I really am -- mirrors how I am about my weight. Oh how I wish I had thin legs. Instead I have these thick legs.... Took a look last night... I don't know if surgery (lipo) would work, even. They are shaped a certain way that I don't like. What I really wish is that this didn't bother me and dominate my thoughts & life so much.
Progress as of today: 53.5 lbs lost so far, only -3.5 lbs to go!
Weighed in this First Day of Spring at 133.0...
OMG work was so busy today. It was like I left for 4 days and the real estate market exploded. My co-worker did a really nice job of maintaining my files while I was gone. I'd like to get her a gift. I was thinking a gas card, maybe? Money is very tight for her, so I want to get her something that would help her out too. Any ideas?
My plan for spring is to start strength training again. Starting slow, with 2 sets of 3 exercises: shoulders, triceps, biceps. Ugh, but I like to train my chest and back too.... But then my sessions will take too long. And push-ups, if I can remember to do them.
Progress as of today: 53.5 lbs lost so far, only -3.5 lbs to go!
If she drinks coffee and buys it outside, Dunkin Donuts card? Remember something - she was just doing her job...it's not mandatory to compensate her further...you can bring in a coffee for her, also. You can buy her lunch :)
Good plans for Spring - weight training really shapes up a body nicely! starting with a few exercises is enough - you dont have to bog yourself down with too many exercises... My plans are cardio :)
Today i a snow day...even my gym closed...but going into work to prob come home early!
Donkey is home! We had originally planned to come home very early Monday morning (today), but since graduation plans had changed, we left on Sunday. Originally, we were going to have Saturday to hang around town & hotel with our son, and then hang around base on Sunday. Well, Saturday was changed to hanging around base, and nobody seemed to want to sightsee in Texas without our son on Sunday, so we just came home early. As it turned out, it was a full day traveling, and we were all very glad to be home.
Having arrived home on Sunday, I really debated about going into work today. My husband said, Don't tell anyone at work, if you decide to go in, so that you keep your options open as long as possible. Although I know I will probably regret the workload I'll be returning to on Tuesday, I decided to take today off: to get errands done, to get back into the swing of things in my routine, to spend time with my daughter and husband, and to regroup my emotions.... I really miss my son. And yet, this is an AMAZING opportunity for him - I am so proud of him for the way this experience has caused him to mature and come into his own. That's why I really hope he passes this push-up test, so that he can continue to grow and learn. I feel he can really thrive in the military, rather than float and flounder here without any direction.
I did not weigh in this morning - because why would I weigh in on a Monday?, but I tried on my wedding ring last night, which was very comfortable feeling, so I'm happy with that. I think I did very well on activity, very good with water intake, and good to so-so with food intake. Managed to stay "regular" during the trip - this is a HUGE issue with me when traveling. It was a good idea to take Fiber One bars and buy a bag of raw carrot sticks for munching. I probably could have made better use of eating raw vegetables, but my husband seemed OBSESSED with food during this vacation. Every thought was, when is our next meal? And he cannot walk much, so that definitely limited the amount of activity any of us could do. Still, I tried to move around as much as I could.
So today is laundry, activity, grocery shopping. Tomorrow will be work.
Speaking of work, I'm having a serious identity crisis here with work. More and more, this year especially, I'm feeling like, Why do I spend so much time with people that aren't nice to me, that I don't particularly like, doing stressful work for people who don't appreciate it? Work used to be my driving force, something I really looked forward to every day. Now I'm feeling like I'd much rather have time to spend with my family. My son has left... Soon my daughter will leave... My mom, brother et al., are in Vegas.... Why am I spending important time doing something else instead of being with the people who matter to me the most? (I mean, I know why -- because I need the money!)
Anyway, now I'm back. When my son does manage to graduate, I won't be attending the ceremony, since I already took time from work (there it is again - WORK), but my brother will probably go if he can, my mom will go if she's available, probably my daughter, if he graduates during spring break, and maybe my husband, but only if daughter goes because he cannot travel alone any more.
So now entering into a new season, my focus will be to find my Zen, to become stronger, both spiritually and physically. Spring will be a renewal of my life.
EVENING EDIT: I'm so glad I did not go to work today. I really needed the extra day to center myself emotionally. I think if I had tried to go to work, I would not have done a very good job. I was able to get all my tasks done and enjoyed a beautiful, but chilly, walk outside this afternoon.
The more I think about Spring coming tomorrow, the more eager I get to make significant changes in myself. When I was in Texas, I didn't see much big hair, but every lady there seemed to have her nails done and a *bling* *bling* on her finger. That's what I want for myself: lovely fingernails and a wedding ring (not much bling) that fits. Instead of the nailbiting, thick-fingered mess that I am, in reality...
Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!
I'm 5'10 with size 13-14 feet and hands that can palm a basketball. Aka man hands. I feel you.
One thing you said that's rather eye-opening was the word "fidget". Maybe that's what I need is a new "fidget" to replace nailbiting.
i wish your son luck as he continues...if he hasn't failed out now, he should continue and get stronger and he'll eventually pass the pushups...that's great! i'm glad he's persevering. remind him of this. not everyone may go straight thru but he will get stronger and will get easier and better at it. everything in life takes work!
have a good day and keep on going :) the nicer weather, aside from a potential snow day tomorrow, will be helping us both. i look forward to longer days now and continuing my cardio training outdoors. I'm beginning to think i should just run around the community during the week...which is what i'll do....and reserve parks for days off & weekends. i need to simplify my training and make it as easy as possible so it gets done more often.
I'm too chicken to get nail tips or acrylics: they have a lot of bad chemicals and can really damage one's nail bed. I don't need that.
So... my son did not pass the push-up portion of his test, which means he will not be graduating this weekend.
The good news is that we will be able to see him and visit him on base. And that is the important thing.
The bad news is that we won't get to see any of the graduating ceremonies and presentations, with him, and we can't take him off base to hang out with him or do tourist things with him.
And he still has to try to pass the test!
All of this we found out just as our plane was landing. Needless to say, this news brought us all way down in spirit and mood.
Caught myself making some not so good food choices, so tried to do better immediately. Water intake ok so far. Activity level ok - got up early to use the hotel gym.
So I'm waiting to hear from our son when we can meet up with him at the base, which will probably be this afternoon. In the meantime, my mom will be flying in...
Such big plans for the weekend and now they are for naught.
Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!
i always find that doing lots of little sets of pushups with very little rest periods in betweeen helps me do more pushups.
what is the pushup requirement, by the way??? just curious...although i know you will not want to talk about it.
i can't believe you paid for a flight and did all that only to hear that kind of news. that is just wrong.
I responded to comments on last night's entry. Thank you for your helpful input!
Now I remember what my snarky co-worker said to me yesterday: he said I was walking so fast that I need to start running during my lunch hour. What? He obviously has issues.
So I weighed in this morning... I can really feel the few extra pounds: I feel bloated. So I will do my best to get through this trip as healthy as I can, and then buckle down when I get back. Like Horn, I've noticed that workouts seem to be more laborious, more of a struggle to get through. Not going as fast, not pushing as hard as I have in the past. So maybe this change of routine will be just what I need to get back on track when I return.
Progress as of today: 53 lbs lost so far, only -3 lbs to go!
yes, if he's commenting like crazy...he has issues (too!)
I'm getting rather nervous... I'm starting to think that I should probably weigh-in before we leave for Texas, so that I know exactly how much I gain while I'm gone. Maybe I will do that, but on the other hand, I'm afraid it will be self-defeating. If I've gained, there's nothing I can do about it now. We'll see how I feel in the morning. I do plan to stick to my routine of waking up, riding the bike, get dressed. The only difference is that I will have breakfast at home and then we leave for the airport instead of leaving for work alone.
So my co-worker was making snide remarks to me again about my lunch. Again I was eating leftovers, so I had a lot of leftover vegetables and a hot dog from a couple of nights ago. I forget what the comment was, but I was like, "Who said I would be taking questions and comments from the audience today?" Sheesh. I think Horn is correct in that there is some jealousy there... or maybe it's just office politics, since he hasn't been returning my "good morning" to me lately. Whatever - I do not have time for this pettiness any more.
My plan for vacation: make use of the fitness room, make use of the pool, walk as much as I can, take stairs, take my 24 ounce Blender Bottle for water and drink keep drinking. Order as many vegetables as I can at meals. If there is a Walmart nearby, stop in for baby carrots and apples. I'm also taking healthy snacks, sugar free gum, and sugar free candy, for the airport, to help.
Progress as of today: 56 lbs lost so far, only -6 lbs to go!
how long will you be in Texas?
you can even make a plan to be healthy overall there....
i've noticed that when coworkers / bosses don't say good morning, it's a "power thing" that they are choosing to think they have over you. i've been in the situation. right - it's politics as you say. it's petty. it's rude. it is not necessary for a boss to act that way to keep his power. it's wrong in my opinion...but many feel it is their right to do..don't worry about it.
people such as me and you that think about weight and food etc., we will always feel weird or feel something when people comment...if they comment they are just thinking about it too...so it should make you almost feel better to see you aren't the only one concerned about these issues....and to NOT take it personally....keep on your plan this time. just as i am...somehow, we have both decided it's not worth another struggle and battle of actually gaining the weight along with a loss of self confidence any more times. (i have lost weight 2x in my life and don't wish to ever have to do it all over again!). same for you...keep on....you've learned from the past people make comments and life is not everything you choose...just keep on.
For some reason, my weight seems to have become a talking point at work today... No reason, just out of the blue. Is it a full moon? It can't be, because the clients haven't gone crazy yet. Maybe it was something in the water, because the plumber WAS at the office today fixing the pipes...
So at lunchtime, I broke my rule and decided to eat with my officemates. This was the first mistake. I'm trying to eat leftovers for lunch so that we don't have much food left at home while we are in Texas. I brought a plate full of raw vegetables and half of a leftover reuben sandwhich from when my husband and I went out to dinner for his birthday. My co-worker goes, "Wow, I used to feel sorry for you for your lunches, but you're doing alright!" (meaning that the sandwich looked delicious, I guess -- which it was.) But he used to feel sorry for me - and you're watching what I eat? What?
Then later in the afternoon, I hear the two attorneys talking about our website. We need to take a new group photo because 3 of the people in the picture aren't with us any more. The one attorney says, "(Donkey) is twice the size she is now." What?
I know I'm being a little sensitive about all of this. I *AM* tougher than this. Friends, you know the struggle is REAL, and you know that I am struggling right now with the numbers. I'm sure that if I were in a stronger place mentally, I'd just brush these comments off like cat hair on a sweater.
Progress as of today: 56 lbs lost so far, only -6 lbs to go!
they probably all look they same as they had when the pic was first taken and you changed...this is why they complimented you in such a backhanded way....
you are doing great, don't change.
Getting up early was very difficult, but didn't want to spend time in bed, even if exercise wasn't the first thing on my agenda today. Mr. Donkey is crabby so I'd rather just stay out of his way. The reality that I will be traveling soon has hit me, and the dread of change in routine is starting to sink in. I see I will have to do some shopping today for warm weather clothes that fit me. So double whammy to deal with.
EARLY AFTERNOON EDIT: I meant to mention in my original post that I saw a Facebook post (friend of a friend) that he was fighting a case of the "late winter blues." So it's not just me. And I suspect that a few of us here might be dealing with that, too. Maybe with daylight savings, with more daylight, things will start to improve for me. Also, I'm curious to see if the warm weather in Texas will help perk things up for me. Illinois winters are not very motivating once the snow melts.
Progress as of today: 56 lbs lost so far, only -6 lbs to go!
Never been to Thailand, lol...
Surprise - I did not weigh in today! First time I missed a weigh-in Saturday in a long time. I weighed in on Thursday at 132.5, and the rest of the week wasn't so great food-wise. Life-wise, it was great, because Mr. Donkey and I went out for dinner on Friday to celebrate his 56th birthday. Ordered a salty dinner and ate more than I normally would. Had to have cake, right? ;-)
Then, today, my mom & her friend, my aunt & uncle, my daughter & I all met downtown in Chicago at the old Marshall Field's -- now Macy's -- and had lunch at the famous Walnut Room. There was not much to choose from that was "under 650" calories, so I went with what I liked instead. Daughter and I split a piece of the Frango Mint ice cream pie dessert. Did a lot of walking, too.
One thing that I've noticed this week and last is that my water consumption has gone down significantly. I was talking with the lady in our building who lost a bunch of weight through gastric by-pass surgery, and she was saying the same thing about her! I know that one of the keys to lower numbers on the scale is to drink more water -- which for me is 90 ounces and over. At one point I was drinking just under a gallon a day. Then I pulled way back and it's been a struggle to get in the "required" (by FitBit) 64 ounces. So not saying it's a cause-effect relationship, but there DEFINITELY is a correlation.
And there is more eating coming up this week too! We were very doubtful that our son would be able to pass the push-ups portion of his physical test, but it looks like he will be able to reach that goal by Wednesday, so we are indeed going to Texas, leaving Wednesday morning through Monday morning. The day we get back will be spent just trying to get back on track because we have to wake up very early to catch the 6:30a plane to Chicago. I hope that we can do a lot of walking because there is much to see in San Antonio, but Mr. Donkey doesn't walk very far with his issues. So we shall see.
Speaking of push-ups, I want to start doing those again. Long story short, I saw an acquaintance's picture she took with her family, and her arm... oh my... I'm sure it was the position, where it's flat instead of bent -- the stupid photographer should have caught that, but he's a guy and doesn't see things like that. Ugh, this is one of those "don't let this happen to you" and so I'm going to start working on my arms again. Maybe that will help jumpstart the numbers on the scale going in the right direction, too...
Progress as of today: 56 lbs lost so far, only -6 lbs to go!
i do think pushups is a great idea...do you do the ones on your knees? or the full pushup? once you can do many, like 15?, on your knees, i think it's time to try to do some regular ones...
sounds like a nice night out with hubby...Once again you sound happier!
thank you for all thee great advice lately!
congrats to your son so far....keep us updated and keep cheering him on.
Finally MAKING time to write. My back seems to have improved enough to be called "normal" again. Wednesday morning was my last back spasm. When these spasms start, I have to be very careful and go into preventative mode so that nothing worse happens. I must remain healthy in order to take care of my husband. Thankfully, this time was very minor.
Decreased my exercise, but remained sufficiently active. Short frequent walks are the best thing for my back, really. So I thought I did very well this week and yesterday, so I thought I would weigh in ahead of schedule: GAINED 2 POUNDS.
I would really like to be back down to 128, and ideally 125. I don't think I can get there until the weather turns warmer and it gets easier to be active outside and eat lighter.
Went and bought new underwear because my old underwear was so stretched out and needed mending along the waistband (all pairs). So I went from a size L to a size M, and they are "tight". What I mean by "tight" (in quotes) is that they actually fit properly but because they aren't baggy, but are properly form fitting, they feel "tight".
I have this issue with my pants, too. Actually all of my clothes. I love wearing leggings and XXL (mens') t-shirts, so that my legs look skinny, and the rest of me looks undefined. That is my look, but it's not a very flattering look. I might look more slender if I had properly fitting clothes. But then they feel restrictive, and that makes me feel fat.
Progress as of today: 56 lbs lost so far, only -6 lbs to go!
I have the opposite problem in that the pants i just bought are suddenly too tight...so weird.
they fit well last Saturday and now i can hardly pull them on right!? Anyways, yeah, some people just like the loose clothes....
i think just wear what you are comfortable in!? unless you want to make a change.?
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The wife wore her original wedding ring for around 10 years before it needed some repair. The repair wasn't done exactly right and something was a little crooked on it. She wore it for another couple years until I decided to replace my everyday gold ring with one of those rubber / silicone rings. Since I was changing rings, we got her a nice upgrade that she loves to wear now. After 17 years of marriage and trying out many different rubber / silicone rings I finally had enough of wearing them. I'm always doing something and they kept getting in the way. Finally got a "ring" tattoo-ed on my finger. I'm not a tattoo type of guy, but that was the best thing I've done in quite awhile. Of course I'm a dude, so I don't care that it doesn't look anywhere as good as actually wearing a nice shiny ring.
happy-1 on 03/21/2018:
Fresh pineapple and pineapple juice will actually clear that sore throat/fevery/sweaty/achey feeling. It's that b chemical... it oxidizes fast so cut it fresh and then chew/suck like a lozenge every couple of hours.
happy-1 on 03/21/2018:
I'm not a fancy fingernail person either. I am really happy with nail buffing because they look shiny like jewels and pretty but no plastic coating that feels claustrophobic or flakes off into food when I cook.
happy-1 on 03/21/2018:
Thick legs are great. Just do squats to make your butt bigger. You can be an instagram star for "cougar booty babe"
horn_of_plenty on 03/22/2018:
I think the shiny ring really decorates a hand, whether the nails are done or not. You can develop a habit of placing it in a convenient place so that you can put it on before you leave the house and take it off when you get home? That's what i would do.
As for your legs, i wish i also had the "skinny legs." I think i probably would have them if i was in shape in my lower body.
The reason you think about your legs and weight etc is it's a habit that you comfortably go back to thinking about to take your mind off something else. OR, at least this is MY case.
Everyone has things they want to change, but you will have to accept yourself for what you are as long as you are proactive and try your best to make yourself your best...
horn_of_plenty on 03/22/2018:
oh feel better - i am sure the cold is from your trip. it will pass you know :)