Home: tea and sips of kombucha 10 Coffee and chocolate 170 200...
Wrap pb and cooked cranberries 350
Almonds 50 and candies 50
forgot to have breakfast
Lunch: baked chicken 150 with ketchup and soy sauce and lots of veggies some roasted 250, pretzels 150: 550.
i guess i can work on a low cal day today...nice
snacking: will be dates, high in potassium 100 cal, and a chocolate 60
1010...
1800 tops
1970 5 day excellent aside from the fact that I'm not feeling good
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I just don't have a desire to go back and teach, don't have a desire to do much more except try to do the work i'm given,i don't have many desires right now. i realize i may not be able to travel much more or do much of anything in life due to all of the poor choices i have made...so if i want to be a court officer, i should just keep on training with the exercise and train to the exact requirements of the physical test or i may not even get that position...so, starting this weekend, i'm starting to train exactly to the test to figure out the beep test and how to train and set up for it - so i can practice in my gym. vacations prob not again...i'm so freaked out on life you have no idea.
We'll suffice it to say it was like being in another country where the gym was located that I went to yesterday. Not really the best place for me to be....manager was gone so trying To Get my money back today bc I signed up stupidly for a year contract and should have just paid the $20 to workout for one day - yesterday -
Lately I am feeling a bit confused and scared of the present and what's to come in my future as my current job is a bit confusing now and the materiAl for my current assignment makes no Sense at all I'll have to ask someone bow to donit. I am just hating the unknown right now - I like the gym and even that seems a challenge To go to right now bc of schedule change - And soon to be taking a class For The next 10 weeks tonstart on 1/23. Just a lot of change. That class is 1x a week from 5-7 so Another day of getting home late. Life is just a bit confusing.
so i want to be a a court officer but my physical ability is low and it's hard to even work on that...seems like is not as easy as i thought it could be and that money doesn't grow on trees at all. Seems everything is just SO CONFUSING...typos are bc i type here while on the bus...
i am going to learn to live very modestly bc it seems that's the only thing my brain can work it's way around for now....my apt is expensive it seems in my mind to pay for just by myself...i am sorta scared out of my bones right now...i'm feeling really REALLY desperate to just know how to keep on....i guess i just need to figure out my work for now...here, at this job. freaking scaring the sh*t outta myself right now.
like i should almost live with my parents is how desperate i feel in my heart. things just don't look good. i just realize that being married could have been better at least paying rent-wise...i'm a mess in my thoughts right now. just need to slow down and think of today and not tomorrow. i guess that's all i can do at this very moment.
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
Home: kombucha 60
Breakfast: coffee 20, dark chocolate 180, banana 120, almonds 50 approx
Mid Morning snack: wrap 100, pb 200, honey 30: 320
750 before lunch..
Lunch around 600... 1350....and clemtine 50 1400...
Before workout / during workout: rice krispie treats 160
total so far :1550....excellent....
Dinner after workout: tbd...
Huge Beef taco on street 5002050 total excellent
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Today I have plans after work to Not to go straight home - gonna join planet fitness for $10 a month ....it'll actually costly more bc I'll Be spending money on taking the train there after work but it's worth it as I really am Not getting used to coming home to get dressed and driving out to gym....so this is pretty much on my way home with a little extra cardio built in to get there - I need a change ! When my current $50 a month gym membership ends I think around summer, I don't plan to rejoin.
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
3 day is great 2000 per day!
Good Morn!
6am Tea and half banana 50
8am: dark chocolates150, coffee with someone's creamer bad girl i am! 50
250....another chocolate 80
Breakfast: honey 50, pb 200, wrap 100: 350...
Snack:almonds and couple dates 50
800....
Healthy lunch brown rice and quinoa mix big serving 300?, tasty garlic shrimp (ricky cooked for me And gave to me at work) 200 and some veggies in sauce 100, later a clementine 50...
1450 and healthy ...tonight I'll have more chicken cutlets and leftovers - I need to cook
Trying to remember dinner: tator tots and chicken fingers 400, soup and cauliflower 100, jello and fruit 100...I think this is it.
2050 monday total
And also need to clean hamster cage tonight - nope Wednesday night !
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(1975 2-day weekend average = AWESOME!)
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I am hardly staying awake at work today, i'm not sure why....prob bc no work really...waiting sorta on next assignment...tired....realizing i love to work out and that i need that to be my goal this year. ... NOT traveling other than summer. that's it....well, and maybe a Miami trip if i can stay free with my friend.
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
Happy day at home :-)
Late morning Huge navel orange 150, chips 450....600.
1pm bacon jerky 300 and celery 50
2pm snack the last of Renee's stroopwaffle cookies she gave me - they were the minis 5 left 200 cal
1150.....been sleepy and resting all day - did a little laundry and shoveled the light powder type snow away from my garage - it had been there since Thursday and yesterday I forgot my shovel so I just drove over it lol .... no biggie but it was good to shovel it away so it can melt and be safer to get my car in and out .... it was about 6 inches deep and a width of like 2 feet that needed to be quickly pushed to the side :-)
After 20-30 min walk where I actually did not freeze bc I dressed well: Small alcohol beverage 100 and one fiber one cookie 120
1370, excellent
2000 cal, tops :-)
Making my chicken fingers for dinner and hopefully they will come out nice and krispy rather than soggy like last time - I think the problem is they are not supposed to be sprayed with cooking spray. They are Purdue white meat frozen breaded chicken fingers
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
Happy sleeping in day!
Breakfast: blackberries 50, banana 120, pretzels 30, warmed cranberries 50, wrap 100, peanut butter 240, cinnamon, black tea: 600.
At gym: will def have the caffeine drink
600....
Pretzels and bites of oatmeal 200 more oatmeal and chocolate 200
1000...
Sushi 450, veg 100.
1550....excellent !
Half orange 50, chips 250, blackberries 100
1950, very good
Back to having a cough after a very long gym session and then walking around outside ..very tired.. hoping winter gets easier
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In an attempt not to skip gym because i've definitely skipped it often lately due to a cold and the cold, i'm heading for it this morning & by bus. i'd rather not find parking on the snow filled streets or use my car in these frigid temps with older tires and an older car now - so not worth it.
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
Have a wonderful workout! Nothing like a gym session to kick off a weekend!
Home: banana and herbal goji tea 120
Work snacking / early meal: 2 dark chocolate Lindt truffles 140 and coffee 50. approx 200.
Late morning meal: wrap 100, cooked cranberries 30, peanut butter 200. 330.
650, nice. and another chocolate 100. 750
Healthy lunch: bagel 350, egg 100, cooked veggies 300? tofu and veg soup ordered with coworkers 650, tops. nice to enjoy a bagel.
1400 after lunch
snack: clementine
1450 before leaving work, excellent....
Very healthy dinner of egg 100, kiwi 50, tons of roasted and cooked veggies 200 and popcorn 200 550 oh and berries 50 and kombucha
Weekly avg approx 2050 and today was 2100 very content with that perfecto week. No exercise till tomorrow .... with the freezing temps it's been difficult as well as having a minor cold
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My body is very sore from a great workout Wednesday night but then no movement at all on Thursday - spent almost the whole day on the couch and the lactic acid didn't get a chance to move around so i'm very sore still from Wednesday night's workout..so my next one is planned for tomorrow, early afternoon - workout schedule has been irregular due to having a cold and the horrible weather - hard to drive / park car right now - so i'll wait till tomorrow to figure it all out since it's my only plan for tomorrow!
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Someone brought in bagels but i'm holding off on eating it till lunch because all bagels do is make you crave more bagels...and i don't need to inhale carbs first thing today....the bagels look EXCELLENT. I can eat the bagel with lunch bc i brought a low calorie lunch (one egg and lots of cooked veggies)
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It’s always nice to have an unexpected day off…except if it means personally having to shovel and snow blow all day?! I was just home and it was peaceful. My dad stopped by lol I am not even going into that …it’s hilarious he drove my mom to work yesterday so he went to work also because they work near each other and I live by them…idk, I’d think at 65 that they’d just STAY home considering my dad has to shovel and snow blow…I’d think he’d just NOT drive my mom to work (45 minutes away in good weather!) …but I guess she got the last word yesterday! I just think they’re dumb and dumber…both want to show the other one up….LOL that’s seriously what I think of it. I felt so bad for my dad to have to snowblow last night, after getting home around 4pm finally with my mom (he told her he had enough and he was picking her up from work by 3pm after he napped on my couch awwww daddy…).
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
Beyond thankful we have a snow day so work is closed !!!! Yay!!!! Even nyc schools closed. My parents went to work and really Not sure why as conditions are really unsafe on the roads and they drive.
Thankful for good food at home also ! Doing 1 load of laundry.
Breakfast: clemtine 50, fiber one cereal 150, nut milk 50, blackberries 100, banana 120. Total here: 470-500 excellent and tasty
10am roasted veggies up to 300 cal and small amount laundry done and a nap.... :-)
770, perfect and a nap :)
1pm lunch pretzels 120, egg on wrap 180. 300
1100....
Some fresh mini peppers calories minimal, and corn chips 150 I think I'll end this day on a light note with very early to bed around 7pm..it will also help balance my high cal week ....
1250....
1500 total perfect.
2050 6 day excellent avg
So far not including Thursday my weekly total is 2160.... trying to decrease it.
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
thank you!!!!!!!!
Still sick a hair still skipping gym it sucks but I just can't get sicker I can't afford to feel worse so I am off gym until this cold / cough goes away.
5:30am Home: goji tea with stevia 0 cal Work: coffee hopefully bc I have an early class that starts at 7am
8:30am Coffee 50 Banana 120, honey and wrap 100 with cranberries 50 and almond butter 200, more coffee 80.
10:30am candies 50 and salt and vinegar almonds 100
11am - one more serious chocolate before lunch. 100 (still giving in - another coworker brought in more chocolate!)
600 1450 after lunch and prob yes to gym
150 before gym!!!
1600.....better.....
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No more eating loads of chocolate but whenever I say no more it mean a more ! We shall see someone is selling them and I can see myself easily buying them as they are conveniently right inside my trailer
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Going to gym tonight bc tomorrow is probably a snow day and then i can be home all day tomorrow resting again. there are chances that work is closed tomorrow, so i'll make the effort to work out tonight in hopes that tomorrow is a snow day at home and i can rest more then..
Forgot what I ate after gym ?
Egg and pretzels ?? And wrap?? 350??
2000 at most Wednesday
Progress as of today: 5 lbs lost so far, only 0 lbs to go!
2200 4-day average = getting better and hoping to start exercise tomorrow night or thursday night...itll prob be thursday night bc still coughing.
I'll get back to commenting soon!....once again, Happy New Year to all DDers and our OUTSTANDING WEBMASTER! Talk more soon! Happy 2018!!
Tuesday:
Home Snack 1: Kombucha did the trick thankfully 70
Work Snack 2: coffee with tasty milk 50, chocolate 200.
Mid Morning Breakfast: wrap 100 with pb 150, banana 130
12:30pm Healthy Lunch: but easy bc fell asleep last night at 4:30pm after taking cold medicine: healthy shepherd’s pie by Amy’s, lettuce, little bit leftover seaweed salad and some pretzels 400??
Snack: clementine 50
1300….more sushi tonight and miso soup. 550 more but had a more unhealthy type of roll...shrimp tempura (fried shrimp) with avocado sushi 550-650. is still quite all right. better off eating a little bit more while having a cold anyways.
grand total today is 2050.
Happy New Year DD friends !!!! Thank you Webmaster ! Isn't it wonderful how many people are using this site after it's been down like a couple weeks!? We love it!
3day average: (def high for not exercising): 2250, but still within decent limits. really i should go to gym tomorrow, but, i realize i can't if i am still with this cold - which i will be. i guess i'll just have to wait until i'm better - rule of thumb is you have to be well below the neck to gym to gym....and my cough is below the neck in my lungs obviously. ah, we'll see. just too lazy to cook today like i had planned.
2018 New Years Day:
total today is 2100...been eating more, especially due to the fact i was taking an online course throughout the 3day weekend and not exercising. i've run outta steam and do not plan to even cook today like i had planned. instead, taking nighttime cold medicine and bed early. i prob won't go to gym tomorrow, taking extended time off gym to feel better. maybe i'll cook tomorrow night, i think...
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I'm doing this online 10 hour safety course. its taking much longer than 10 hours - taking me most of the holiday weekend. It's ok - i'm sick and nothing more i can do than relax on the couch! So, let me get back to it, I'm almost done! I have about 4 hours left and already completed 6 hours. I hope to be done actually by EARLY afternoon - def before 2pm! I'd even prefer to be done by noon - but depends how fast i can read, click, not get disracted, and how long i can sit on the couch without getting up! lol...
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I finished the course at 1:10pm and even did laundry also ... just need to put it away. I got so sick of the course, i decided to see if the laundry room was empty and to my surprise it stayed empty besides for myself of course and nobody came down at all while i was doing laundry! Was wonderful to be the only one in there, getting in & getting out without having to talk to anyone!
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I'm going out to the store to buy a few more things to fight this cold. Then, i'm picking up some Miso soup and I'm coming home to have it as well as to cook. No gym yet, i'll wait till tomrrow because i'm just NOT 100%. I may even have to wait till after tomorrow if i want to get rid of the cold....yes.
I may actually skip working out until the cold is fully gone. but i do know also another thing - i am going to be getting even busier as the winter goes by - because i'm taking a course that starts January 23 and is only 1x per week lasting till early APRIL! ...that's a sorta impactful commitment, especially if that means to balance now 4x a week of being out of my apartment after work/weekends. It's just a lot for the Winter.
And a lot with all the job location changes and commuting. I am working just to feel better - another reason to wait to go to gym when i'm feeling much better - although it also means AGAIN my strength is DECREASING. I hate missing workouts, it truly screws up any hopes to actually get stronger because i'm constantly sliding backwards and having to recoop. ah well.
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2 day Sat/Sun avg is ok - 2325
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Over the past couple weeks that DD was down, I logged about 2100 per week for those two weeks (sorta high, i have been indulging) on calories while being sick with a cold. I might have to visit the dr today to get something stronger than the cold meds I'm taking...since it's been around 2 weeks now. I'm just gonna buy more cold medicine at the pharmacy.
PS Hope you feel better soon! I had a nasty cold for about 2 weeks. Now the husband has it.
also, it also took me well over the 10hrs to complete - more like 15...
but it's pretty much still better than going outside your place to a class all day.
Before starting up with soon an added class every Tuesday night until April...I am hoping this cold ends by weekend. Starting to even feel fat but that could also be PMS lol I do feel moody....
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Life is scary, all you can do is live one day at a time. Don't get discouraged. You have a goal with plans, so just keep working towards that goal and look at work changes as obstacles and keep moving forward. One thing is work is a must to maintain monies for essentials, so I get that. But as I've told my BFF in Oklahoma and my DH, you are trainable! You can learn new things and sometimes you will have to be out of your comfort zone, but you got this!
Try and have a good day. IP
i just know that i'll never be rich and just scared i'll never have enough money to live normally in life ... but maybe i should go on like most people do - those who aren't rich - the ones in the direct middle - and just live life as it comes as i have been doing. everything scared me but i guess i can just try to keep on...it seems i'm one of the only white women / men even that takes the subway and bus now in the morning...i wonder - how is it that nobody else is riding but me who is white!? have i done so wrong? made so many wrong choices?
all in all, i just feel a bit out of my element as of late based on day to day strange experiences.
ty for kind words, i'll make the most of what you said.
happy-1 on 01/10/2018:
Omg, i could have written this post. I feel for you.
Hugs, thank you xx
Donkey on 01/10/2018:
I completely understand where you're coming from. Remember when I was freaking out a few months ago, knowing that my husband was going to stop working, and that we'd have to sell the house, etc.? Sadly, I too know that we/I will never be wealthy. I don't really wish for things like that because I'm afraid that I'll come into riches in a way I don't want to! (i.e. being the beneficiary of someone's life insurance policy!)
Please don't judge your financial status according to your fellow commuters. While your observation/conclusion made me smile, I don't think you can make that deduction about others' money situations.
I would encourage you to try not to let your anxiety run amok and keep things in a healthy perspective. Yes, save money if you at all can. Yes, live modestly, as much as you can. But you can't think too far ahead or you'll miss the moments in front of you!
It's definitely not worth it to marry someone you don't love, or to work a brutal job.
I DO AGREE that if you want to be a court officer, you should train SPECIFICALLY for the test. Your goals and parameters are set; now work on meeting the challenge. I'm surprised to read that you feel that your physical ability is so low. Don't let the discouragement from your previous physical test dampen your ambition.
I bet that a lot of this ambivalence about yourself and your future is stemming from not feeling very comfortable at your current assignment...
Yes you are reading me through - just once again having a difficult time adjusting to the change poorly