calories are about 2265 today.
ok...come time for my friend's wedding, i WILL be ----en 15 lbs less. I WILL weigh in the 110-120 range. NO more Freekin excuses darn it! I am too young to look like this. OR, I'm worth much more than I'm putting out. SICK of it. I have to go the low carb way for now. It'll speed up weight loss and I plan on sticking with it. Carbs will be moreso from fruits/veggies than grains. Healthy oils. less calorie counting, more focus on health. and NO bars this week. NO matter what.
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for the 1000th time, i'm ready to grow up. no more stupid food games. my favorite quote of the year:
"If it were easy, everyone could do it."
This quote is really good for any of life's complications and hardships. It may be difficult, but a challenge is a challenge and that's why it's hard to succeed. It should be. So is my case - with my occupation and with my diet. Of course, moreso with diet right now.
snack cal: 100
dinner calories: 205.
total so far: 2145. I can go up to 2250 for today. Then, i plan on a low carb - produce only diet for the week to look my best for the start of my program.
remember, if it were easy, everyone would do it.
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1820 cal and its only 10am. no yoga today. reading right now for my program which starts in one week.
feeling self conscious.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
i binged. expected - usually happens when i end something (like a last day of work, etc). so, calories are 2600 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++=
ok, i'm exhausted and NEED a nap. no yoga. but i will stop by the gym later.
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pretty good day so far.
one mile walk during work since we didn't have lunch so i couldn't walk then. we got out early instead! :) and, it was my LAST DAY! wahoo! because this week i'm on VACATION instead of working up until the last minute before i go back to school! wahoo for relaxation and doctor's appointments and whatever else i need to do to get ready. unfortunately, this will involve a LITTLE shopping. i don't want to, but we can't wear our uniforms until the 3rd week...so i need to dress nicely. It's the rest of my life that this xray program is preparing me for.
will bike ride to yoga today.
then, yoga tomorrow morning and sunday morning. then, next week i will TRY for yoga 2x per day when i can.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
after a binge day, it is almost impossible for me to get right back on track. (hehe, another reason not to binge in the first place!) however, i have now pretty much recovered and i'm looking foward to my week off.
total calories for today will be: 1670 to 1700 cal!! well done, jackie! :)
dinner will be eggplant rollettes by cedarlane (microwavable) and a humungous cucumber...and a small amount of lettuce. followed by some mints.
calories are not bad at all. i had a lot of fruit when i got home from work...and now i'm going out for a bike ride! i snacked on a large plum and two large apricots.
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doing ok. woke up STARVING and bloated all at the same time! and exhausted.
calories ok. lots of coffee at work with no sugar added almond milk.
more to come.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
evening edit:I didn't binge. yes, i had a big dinner but not a binge. dinner: whole bag of broccoli slaw, microwaved with garlic, one tomato, one large plum, microwavable meal. 450.
total cal today: 1750 approx. so much better! :)
2mi exercise during work...and i plan on the gym tonight. with some weights/elliptical.
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afternoon edit: so instead of working all the way till next friday and then possibly heading into my new xray program unrefreshesed, i'm finishing work this Friday. taking a whole week off to prepare myself. i do plan on going to yoga every day that week since i do have an unlimited course.
i hope to at least balance out my crappy eating this week by the time i enter the program, Sept. 8th. haha, my birthday is the 9th. i thought i'd definitely have lost the weight by then. instead, i maintained this summer. If I could go back in time, I think I could have made much better choices and could have DEFINITELY lost at least 10 lbs. I'm a little upset about that. and writing this makes me want to be successful for the future. starting now.
i really do know i can do it. when i turn 26, i want it to be a year of successes. So I didn't reach my goals for the end of the summer, but life still has it's opportunities. damn it...i'm sooo young and have so much life ahead of me. i NEED to quit it with thinking so negatiely all the time. i worked all summer. that's great. didn't really earn me that great a profit though.
i need to remember life should be ENJOYED. read a little, relax a little, an spend time doing things for the betterment (not a word!) of myself.
the weight loss journey has not ended. and it will be successful.
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original entry:
having some difficulty staying totally on track. will try for a 2,000-2,200 cal day today.
having Dunkin Donuts for lunch. May give into temptations.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
Forward & Downward (number wise)!
not good day. i thought it would be but apparently not! 4500 cal. i'm in one of those phases or negative cycles right now. i'm trying to end it, sort of...
when speaking of a negative cycle i mean i binge one day and then can't break out of it for a few days.
tuesday: 4500
monday: 3600. ew.
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binge last night followed by 1400 calorie breakfast today.
but, i am actually back on track to a degree!
more later.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
It must be that we reach a place (maybe a scale number or a confidence that we are slim enough) where we feel 'safe' to eat what we want for a while...
But...we eventually 'wake-up', don't we and realize...IT IS TIME TO DISCIPLINE OURSELVES AND GET BACK ON TRACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ~Love, Maria (smile!)
binge followed by more bingeing: bread with pb and cream cheese and caramel topping. 600!!
total cal: 3600.
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wanted to binge a bit after dinner and gave in. following my 450 cal dessert, i had 1/2 cup raisinettes (360) and two granola bars (280)
total cal: 2960. i'll round that to 3,000.
sheesh. everything tastes so good.
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lots of eating today. in a good way buy i do actually feel a little bloated. all good.
2 mi during work...and i would like to go on another short walk. like a half hour. i have to call this guy back from online dating who left me a message last night...i'm really not in the mood to talk to any guy right now but i have to. :( i'll tell him i have to go but didn't want to not call back.
so far, calories are 1870 but my mind is wandering and wants dessert. lol. dinner was a satisfying 570 calories. so we'll see.
gave in to dessert. rich ice cream with some jelly on top.
total cal might be as high as 2320. ok.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
1850 calories today. right now, i cannot be so concerned with calorie restriction and diet as much as just eating within my calories. I will be starting a whole new education program in two weeks which is not much time. It is NOT time for a crazy diet plan. Exercise, that's fine. But, it's NOT the time to try to lose as much as I can or something before the program starts. It's only important for me to be myself and work to achieve my goals as much as I can without going overboard.
This was actually a good weekend because I didn't binge eat. More or less, I had a decent amount of calories both days as well as Friday. I am proud of myself for making good decisions on these days.
Still, I get too hungry in the mornings/afternoon and I'm going to have to think about the foods I will be eating and when during this program. I need to have ENERGY. I need to do my best. This is a big chance for me and for the rest of my life! I am excited and anxious for it to begin! :)
Exercise: 40 min bike, hot yoga :), 30 min stroll, 20 min elliptical, some weights and abs. yes, a complete physical day. wouldn't change a thing.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
Suggestions for keeping hunger away: Protein! And fiber! And did I mention Protein? :-)
sun entry: breakfast 300 cal mostly carbs.
snack: one black apricot (saw them for the 1st time in a fruit/veg store, they look like slightly fuzzy dark purple plums and taste good!) and one plum. and 2 tbsp pb on a cracker: 295
snack: veggie/fruit powder in water: 35
BIG, tasty lunch: jeno's microwave pizza which i used like a flatbread inside of which i put lettuce and some deli turkey. 570 and some mints. 590
snack: lots of pineapple cc and bran crackers: 300...total 1520. I'm thinking around 1900-2000 calories today.
did a bike ride and yoga so far. i'd like to do some elliptical/weights later. but first, i must buy white pants!!! yuck! and lots of them, like at least 5 pairs for school...
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sat entry:
ate a little unhealthy today. was at grandma's and had 7 cookies (four big three small.) so, that added about 530 extra cal. they are good though...and free. so, maybe if i just have a little less it'll be ok.
ordered food with my sister for dinner. then, had two plums and some mints after.
i'm hoping calories are around 2200 for today...and not more. right now, i'm making the most of exercise because i realize i shouldn't be eating 1200 cal (not that i ever do) or anything very low since i usually do get in some exercise each day. all in all, 2200 cal would be ok with me for today.
that's about it for now! tomorrow, i have plans to do yoga/bike ride in the morning. then, unfortunately, i need to go shopping to find white pants for the program i'm entering. i want to buy them tomorrow.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
RE: Dating (again) - You are so smart to have standards (that may sound corny and old-fashioned, square but I mean it). There are always men who are self-made "clods", but I think women have "sold out" to lower standards and that's why men are of a lesser quality. Women need to give men the chance to rise to bar and prove themselves. Everyone benefits - the men have higher self-esteem because they know they have someone of quality and vice-versa - Gee I sound really un-cool, but I really believe this - even if I didn't say it very well.
thanks everyone for the thoughtful dating advice on my last entry!
things are much better than yesterday. was a bit tired during the morning but it wore off. now, time for a late session at the gym. looking foward to it, actually.
calories so far: 1470. but i may have another meal or so. or at least another snack. we'll see. not many veggies...but tons of tomatoes. 5 plum tomatoes to be exact.
alright, going out to the gym.
total calories approx. 1800. good day for me.
2 mi during work walk, elliptical 20 min, 10 min walk, weights/little bit of abs.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
Have a good evening!
around 1850 today.
i went on a crappy date. i met him in the city at 10:30pm. basically, the gist of the date, is that he wanted to know if i would sleep with him early on in the relationship. well, i would never. that's me. can't change that so much. so, the date ended pretty soon after. i was home by 1am...left the city at 12. what crap.
i should not have gotten my nails done...that was a waste of money...although they do look good.
what have i learned??? weeknight dates suck. those guys are players. lol, a generalization but it makes sense.
exercise: 2 mi during work and some walking in city...but not much.
Progress as of today: 2.5 lbs lost so far, only 7.5 lbs to go!
Have a good Friday!
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Go out and take a break-walk.....
Maria7 on 08/30/2008:
Yes...a walk is a good idea! Don't feel self-conscious! You are a wonderful person. Go outside with a smile on your face and walk a while...
Donkey on 08/30/2008:
Relax. Eating food isn't going to solve anything. You can't resolve other issues through bingeing.
grumpy on 08/30/2008:
Good for you. You can do it, girl! As for your comment, i hope you're right. I don't mind if tomorrow I am still at 167.6, but i will be pretty upset if I am up. I don't think i could possibly be up though, unless the ice cream really kicks in, cause i've been ok otherwise. Fingers crossed.
CutyPie on 08/30/2008:
good that you're really devoting yourself :) Sometimes, thou, it helps to take your mind off things... like a walk is good. I'm just starting to realize for myself that I need to fill my days with OTHER stuff, so I have less time to focus on the food and the negative. Good luck.
lafemme_loca on 08/30/2008:
I like your quote and that you are going to 'stop the food games'. I know you can do it. I hope you can rest and get some exercise even if it is quick. :-) Don't worry about your program, you will be awesome!
selina on 08/31/2008:
And, I endorse all the above comments.... But, seriously, it's not easy! But, it's not impossible, either. It's a fight and you have to be ready to win it!