if i keep this up, i BETTER see a loss! soon, i'm going to not believe the calories on these cellnique drinks...as well as a few other packaged foods. because i really should have lost weight by now...but i also am not doing cardio, only hot yoga. so, well see...and we'll see if i have to change up my routine. however, i'm not giving up or changing anything yet. because i know i burn a lot in yoga and the weight is just "weighting" to come off!
wow! i was CRAVING central today. whew. glad most of the day is done. and such BORING stuff today in class so it was hard to remain focussed and ignore the signals of my body all day. i felt like i was going through a detox from all the mounds of food i was eating all weekend. not a lot of calories, but lots of actual food consumed despite. so today was a break for my body but not my mind!
breakfast later at school 8am: apple, protein/green drink: 170
10am snack: drink 90
noon lunch light: soy chips, coffee w. lot of milk 290 i think the coffee left me shakey. so, i guess i need to watch caffeine when i eat so light. didn't realize the chips wouldn't just soak it up.
4pm SNACK: SO HUNGRY. marathon bar w. lots of protein/fiber 290
dinner 7:30pm: microwavable meal, 100 cal worth of veggies. total: 450 which is good. blah...and 2 mini apricots 50
total: 1350 yay! except for the part about still not really losing anything! i think i have gained muscle from my yoga practice. i can feel it! :)
so much love right now.
yoga today for sure.
Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!
MONDAY MORNING QUICK EDIT: well, well. i weigh myself fully intending to see 135...but NO! it's still high up there around 137-138! what's up with that!?? i ate dinner EARLY and weighed on an empty stomach (although i do have some waste in my system still.) darn. i know the lower numbers will come, so i'm not worried...just antsy for them to come already!
____________________________________________
SUNDAY:
what i learned about sunday mornings: get my ass to the gym or yoga no matter how bad i feel. don't eat a big breakfast which prevents me from going to the gym.
i weiged myself in clothing and thought it would be below 135. but not so much - scale said 137. eesh. i'm not upset and i hope to have a big loss by Friday.
feeling sooo snacky today. probably because of all the yoga yesterday.
breakfast: bran crackers eaten like cereal, milk: 230, tea
Snack: huge grapefruit, cellnique 220
lunch: canned salmon w. bbq sauce, a redpepper. yogurt after 240
binge right after lunch: 5 slices cinnamon rasin bread 440
snack at grandma's: 2 red peppers: 80
dinner: large more than a pint serving of sauteed collard greens (i think around 230?)that i bought the other day from a health food store with fried tofu (i know this was 200, package said so)...and, naughty me, a low carb energy drink 20 bc i gave into temptation on the way home. total: around 450 but i could be off on the sauteed greens. i hope not!
total cal today: amazingly 1660 approx. calories. i didn't give in at the end and this is a pretty good amount if i say so myself. of course, i'm really unsure on the sauteed greens i had at dinner (HUGE portion) but at least it was healthy.
i am just happy i didn't ruin the day. boy would that be unfortunate. i cannot ruin it this time around. this is my last shot before the spring, before my friend's wedding, and for me. i MUST lose weight this time. meaning, by the end of this month, I BETTER be below 130. i must do it for myself. i will not live in this fat body ANY LONGER. i will NOT!
Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!
Hope you have a wonderful visit with your GM...please give her a hug for me.
good morning.
i almost gave into a peanut butter or other high calorie temptation but instead chose a low cal drink to satisfy myself after breakfast.
breakfast: 2 cellniques, large grapefuit: 280
yoga10:30-12:00
12pm: snack before my SECOND hot yoga class: cellnique...and...
yoga 12:30-2:00 ...coconut water during yoga: 140.
snack while picking up a few things: large iced coffee 100 (520 so far)
3pm lunch: lots of yogurt, bran, banana about 500 cal.
snack at 5pm: a whole pint, packed!, of grilled veggies with olive oil. estimate: 250?
snack: kombucha...60
late dinner: 9:00pm...too late obviously...some terrible soup so i threw most away 100, and tofu/cucumbers in balsamic vinegar 220
total: 1650 or so...ehh, i will aim for lower cal tomorrow but i know not to be too strict or it'll backfire which is NOT in my plans.
i did two yoga classes in a row today! just a half hour break in between. i hadn't planned on two...just decided it while doing the warmup during my first class. i was a bit nervous because it is hot yoga, lots of sweating and you really have to make sure you are hydrated and have enough energy to repeat the class again when it's over! i was glad i decided to stay. and yes, i had to start the second class pretty much very wet and with a wet towel on my mat since i wasn't prepared with more than that. in the future, i may do doubles one day on some weekends when i have the time. 3 hours of yoga total. and it was a VERY good experience. I can only thank myself for sticking with yoga and having a positive attitude with myself to be able to accomplish this. and i did pretty well in both classes. :)
Progress as of today: -8 lbs lost so far, only 18 lbs to go!
But just the oddest sensation to catch yourself like that.
Thanks for what you wrote to me. It helped a lot.
Hope you have a wonderful evening!!!
dinner was too sugary. a large grapefruit, large orange, seaweed salad again which deffinitely is marked too low in calories!, piece tofu, cellnique. too much food but i'm not going back for more. i should have had one less fruit, no seaweed salad. total: around 500
total cal today: 1620 still ok. hopefully i'm not really too off with calories...
i went to yoga, it was worth it. will go in the AM.
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i promise to comment tonight on all your entries!
happy friday, happy weekend. i need it! i want to just throw in the towel and not do yoga tonight, but why!? why should i mess with good health because i'm tired. yoga will make me feel better. it's what my body needs and it's like a medicine. i have to remember this...always.
breakfast: apple, cellnique (you can look it up to see what it is online) 170
snack: drink 80 cellnique
lunch: a healthy (jk) hot pretzel w. ketchup/mustard and a coffee w. extra milk 420
snack: a little large so i am going to the later yoga class for sure. whole bag popcorn, 250, and a package of a store bought seaweed salad. i bought two of them, not sure if i believe the calories are really this low and there's a bit much garlic. not sure if i'll buy again. 200 (450 total) i've been VERY munchy these past few days...due to being TIRED! this is what lack of sleep does to a person.
total so far: 1120
i can keep it in the 1500s. this would be really good.
Progress as of today: -10 lbs lost so far, only 20 lbs to go!
Breakfast: stopped at DD for a bagel w. egg but didn't eat it all! wow. 300
snack: NONE. CRAZY MORNING.
lunch: Large Hot Pretzel with ketchup/mustard, coffee. 500
snack: green/protein drink, shot wheatgrass
400...plus 130 (lots of broccoli rab with pine nuts/raisins seasoned/oil from health food store!, 2 whole cucumbers, tofu...small orange, small apple)
total: 1430.
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this is short because i have used all my anger crying...but luckily i have gotten that out of my system. perhaps i'll talk about it tomorrow.
but after posting today's calories, i had to come on here again to say that in the past week, calories were not over 1550 i believe. now that IS progress. I went from binging every other day for months straight to keeping calories in check starting with the New Year. I am very happy.
Progress as of today: -10 lbs lost so far, only 20 lbs to go!
Hang in there!
Sorry you had a bad day.... Crying can do wonders though.... Check back on ya tomorrow... Get some sleep!
Oh the last paragraph in my entry isn't speaking to anyone here..just in general about how sometimes some things make you want to lose weight the right way and not by starvation and pills. I don't think anyone here is doing that, just thinking about it out loud I guess lol. Glad you had a good cry...I had one the other night myself =)
Have a great evening and keep up the fantastic work!
breakfast: 170 drink, apple
snack: 80 drink
lunch: big wrap w. turkey and mustard 450
snack: 240 bar
total so far: 940. really tiring day. i NEED to get MORE sleep. i've been going to bed way too late.
dinner: at first i was just planning on a smoothie made with a banana, a pear, some protein/fiber mix, and some light soy milk. all that for just 330 cal. but, i also ate some tofu with a really healthy quart of kale made with seasoning from a health food store. probably around 200 more cal. totaling 530 approx. but it was worth it...plus 2 red peppers (bingy mood!) 80
total cal: 1550which is still good.
i did hot yoga, glad i went! i almost shot it down because i was exhausted! you see, i have to get up early, around 6am....so even going to bed at 11 is too late!
Progress as of today: -10 lbs lost so far, only 20 lbs to go!
I took your advice and I'm so excited to tell you that I ate a veggie stir fry!!! The best part is I LOVED it! It occured to me that I do like some veggies although I always figured the one's I like aren't all that great for you, that they're more empty veggies.....I don't know....maybe you can shed some light on it for me. I actually love onions, mushrooms, peppers, cucumbers and potatoes. I like raddishes and carrots but only raw, and I'll eat corn but only corn-on-the-cob (which usually involves butter which I'm completely avoiding)
Anyways, I thought since I don't mind some chinese food I picked up bean sprouts at the store and I steamed them with mushrooms, onions & red peppers. Then I added about 4 oz of boneless skinless chicken breast (cooked with no butter, just spiced) then I added it together, put a little bit of soy sauce on it and it was delicious! I know it likely seems like an odd combo but I just put in things that I liked and it was really tasty.....to me at least :0) Now I'm wondering how to put it all into fitday to work out my calories.....hmmmm....
So I don't know how great those kind of veggies are as far as nutrition and vitamins but HOP I ate veggies and liked it, woo-hoo!!! So enough about me but I just had to share this with the "Veggie Queen" herself....you :0)
tuesday...off to an ok start but could have used more sleep!
B: 170 drink, apple
S: 80 green drink
L: 250 1/2 turkey wrap
snack: coffee 50
huge ass dinner: 32 brussel sprouts with some oil stir fry along with scallion 450, tofu90, 2 peppers 60, green beans w. almonds 115 (total around 700)
total: 1250 nice. :) i may have something small though later.
snack: cellnique.
final total: awesome at 1330. wahoo! I can make this work!
no yoga because i stayed at school late and i want to relax and also wanted to enjoy a large dinner without needing to go to bed right after. tomorrow i'll be back to my normal schedule with yoga.
Progress as of today: -10 lbs lost so far, only 20 lbs to go!
Oatmeal with nuts & fruit ~ Isn't that something.... You can't eat it, cause you would want more...But for me, it is a great day starter... Truthfully, I don't like breakfast.... Never have, but know I must make myself eat it to benefit my body the best....
Great Wednesday thoughts to you!
(this is for me: in the past 30 days, i've binged on 14 of them. some binges were not huge but others were. however, in the past 7 days, i've binged once and it was BEFORE the new year. i am doing well for myself)
i just ate dinner WAY too late, at 8pm ending at 8:45 and i was going to try to go to bed early. i made the mistake of eating in the kitchen (i usually don't haha) and i went back for 350 more calories after my dinner. it was a mini binge. the good thing is i stopped myself (due to fullness!) and didn't ruin the calorie count for good today, thank god! i put some hard work into my yoga practice.
as for my professor that just passed away, turns out the funeral was a more relaxed graveside funeral. also, the wife will NOT being having people over to sit shiva as they call it. so, i am left to send a card. i would have went to her house, and was planning on running over today after work, but now i'll be writing out a card to her and enclosing a picture of her husband with me at a music recital i played in college. i'll never forget him. :) good man! :) thanks for your comments about this.
calories throughout day till yoga: 660 mostly really healthy.
calories for dinner: WAY too much but mostly healthy besides the 350 extra. total: 820 dinner calories which is not so good right before bed!
total calories today are ok: 1480. but i do need to eat a little less next time and not in the kitchen - i always go back for more. it's weird, but i usually eat at a table i have in my room. don't ask!
lots of interesting things went on today and i'm happy to be back on school because life will not progress if you're only on vacation!
Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!
AS for your day ~ YAYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Congrats for "stopping"... :o)
it's gonna be a busy night. school tomorrow after 10 lovely days off. sorry i'm not gonna comment on your diaries.
snack: dunkin donuts med iced coffee 70
lunch: popcorn, cellnique 340
snack: cellnique (yeah, i drink it too much!) 90
dinner: humongous! veggies seasoned/salted 220, more veggie stir fry w. tofu 180, more peppers 90, kombucha 60. total here: 550 good stuff, man!
total for today: 1240! yeah man, nice way to start off the week! i will do this! i will lose this weight! i will do it, yeah!
update: i will definitely go to pay shiva at my professor's wife's house sometime this week. i must observe his passing and he had a profound impact on my life so i will definitely go and pay my respects.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
i got an email saying my french horn professor from 2000-2004 while in college died recently. He was teaching at the university while either in his late 70s or possibly it was his 80s. I'm not sure. He was REMARKABLE. one of the most honorable and respected people i've known in my life. he was a horn player for the Chicago Symphony as well as the Radio City Music Hall in NYC. It actually made me unable to sleep and I'm up around 5am today. I'm unable to go to the funeral which is during the day monday and even though i feel sorta bad, i will only be sending a card. I will definitely write a lot, not just my sincere condolences, but i cannot bring myself to go the his wife's house, especially because of my decisions to step out of the world of music. she doesn't know me very well if she does remember me at all from the few times i was in his house for lessons when we didn't have them at school. i regard him highly and it's a lot to think about. i'm sure the funeral will be filled. I'm not sure how he died, but he was very active i know up till a few years ago - then i lost tough with him after graduating. i actually feel a pang of guilt not stopping by the house which is about 30 minutes away. i hope i don't go to hell for this.
breakfast: tea, cellnique, grapefruit.... it's not even 7am yet... 190
Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!
so i woke up without a huge appetite today. my abdomen is still doing some somersaults. not sure why. it was killing last night. i think TOM actually has a lot to do with it. i'm sure thinn is dealing with this too!
last night yoga was killing my abdomen even more, i almost walked out. so i'm taking a break from it today. :) I need the cardio. Been sitting on my butt on break!
breakfast 9:30am: grapefruit, cellnique. 200
lunch: salmon canned w. bbq sauce, apple 220
snack: green drink 80
dinner: large, out to eat, very good. sesame cucumber salad, vegetarian lettucewraps. couldn't be more than 1,000. dunkin donuts iced coffee later.
total around 1500 today. nicely done to me! :)
exercise: no yoga thankfully! i needed a break. instead, 45 minutes elliptical, some situps, some pushups! nice day, very nice day.
what a movie: the mysterious case of benjamin button - be ready to cry, cry, and cry some more. SO SAD. SO GOOD. this is really a great movie as all the tv advertisements say!
Progress as of today: -12 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!
"Bottle of 96" ~ No No No... Not a bottle.... It was a box of Sudafed.... If I drank anything that came in a bottle other than Sobe, Pom or Soda Pop, I would be flat on my behind......
"Carbs" ~ My pantry has been super low on the better choices and I got to go to WalMart last night to replenish... I hadn't gone shopping for a bit, cause I can't stand the HUGE crowds... Now holidays are over, it's much better.
Have a great day!
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Great Job.... Positive thinking too!!!!!!
panda22 on 01/12/2009:
Awesome job! Do you eat the Snicker's marathon bars?? I eat those, and I was just wondering since that's the only kind I've heard of lol
Have a great evening!
thinnside40 on 01/12/2009:
I hope some of that love is for yourself too...... Have a good night's sleep, so you can have a good day tomorrow!
Maria* on 01/12/2009:
SPECTACULAR!!! You did extra good on the cals! (but I didn't...)
Sometimes caffeine can surely make a person jittery!!!
Hope you have a wonderful evening! Love, Maria
Justine6Robert3 on 01/12/2009:
Amazing job keeping your calories in check.....and avoiding those cravings! I have no idea what a "cellnique" drink is, I'll have to look that one up. Keep it up HOP, your doing fantastic! I'm sure your body will respond soon with some weight loss :0)
WI3 on 01/12/2009:
STAY AWAY FROM THE FRIDGE! hehe
glad to see you going strong. I can't drink a lot of caffeine if I eat light, does the same thing! Keep up the great work!
loveray on 01/13/2009:
gaining muscle can be frustrating, but think about what wonders you are doing for your body...this is true self love! if you can see how much health you are adding and how much sickness you are taking away the pounds and sizes start to not matter as much. i love you and wish you all the best, always. oh yes- silence is my only tool in working through the need to binge...meditation every day i have found, is not a choice for me- it's a necessity. xo
mcwoo40 on 01/13/2009:
Hiya,I'm glad you enjoy reading my entries.Where i come from we say 'tea'and around London they normally say 'Dinner'.I would say dinner/lunch for my meal @ 12ish.Anyway you have a healthy day,Julie
skinnyjeans on 01/13/2009:
Just stick to your plan and the weight WILL come off! :) You did fantastic yesterday.
Maria* on 01/13/2009:
Hope you're having a nice day!
petaldew on 01/13/2009:
Keep up the good work!