yesterday was a TERRIBLE binge.
today was a 990 binge on breakfast.
doing work. i know its the 4th of July. NO plans. DO NOT want plans...too much work to do. even if i do chill here in between doing work, that's fine. i just cannot be out, when i have work on my mind.
exercise is none so far, i'll update that tomorrow if i do. i decided not to go to yoga, because i didn't want to be a in VERY crowded room. I know how people get and many classes were cancelled due to the holiday! so, i wasn't going to go, after binging last night, looking and feeling crappy with many extra people around.
calories are 1530. pretty amazing. if i don't stay somewhat low the rest of these next couple weeks, i'll regret it standing in front of everyone conducting them. i didn't really loose any weight like i wanted to. stress got to me. i let it...even though it didn't have to be this way at all.
when this class is over, i'll have a term paper to write for another class. if i have any interviews in the next two weeks, i'm not taking them. i have work for this class to do...and i seriously cannot have ANY other distractions besides the yoga...which keeps me sane, as well as any other working out, practicing horn, and performing/rehearsing i do. enough is enough.
anyway, what i meant to say in the last paragraph, is that when this class is over, i am making and keeping a committment with myself. This commitment is about fitness. I am sick of being a flabby, out of shape woman, who is only going to be 25. This is seriously PATHETIC. I don't want to live this way the rest of my life. I want to be "LEAN and MEAN." Just kidding, but i do want to be strong. I'm not just saying this cause i'm stressed. I really mean it. I MUST step it up a notch, and when the times comes, I WILL!
Progress as of today: 0.2 lbs lost so far, only 8.2 lbs to go!
Wednesday morning edit:
edit: I'm FREAKING out about this class i'm studying for. so, in an attempt to procrastinate, i decided to have a snack yesterday...and, instead, ate over 2,000 calories in the early afternoon.
today: I thought i would "restrict" calories a lot, but instead found myself eating 990 calories for breakfast. at least i'm full now!.
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:(
Binge. 3150 calories today. I just cannot learn!
exercise: 70 (yoga 60, bike 10) no other cardio.
Progress as of today: 0.2 lbs lost so far, only 8.2 lbs to go!
edit: my goal for Tuesday is yoga and 40 minutes of cardio.
total July exercise: 3hrs, 35 min
today's exercise: 145 min (yoga 60, weights 30, bike 10, treadmill 45)
calories: 1390 :)
yoga has been soooo difficult lately! LOL, i still love it, though. It seems my muscles have a hard time doing it EVERYDAY! but, as long as I pay for a monthly unlimited, i plan on dragging myself there, no matter what, everyday!
yesterday, at the fair, there were huge giraffs, llamas (which i thought are only found in the middle east but aparently i'm wrong!) they originated in the plains of North America, monkeys, sheep, one elephant, and a camel!!! how odd! I couldn't believe there was a camel, giraffs, and llamas there! but, the humps were strange on the camel, they were moving around a lot! haha.
have a good evening.
Progress as of today: 0.2 lbs lost so far, only 8.2 lbs to go!
hi, good evening!
total calories: 1150
total exercise: 70. not good because really no cardio. 60 yoga and 10 for biking there and back.
i did meet up with a friend tonight and we stopped by a fair...went on the ferris wheel! it was a good change of pace, i'll tell you that!
everyone have a good day tomorrow! :)
Progress as of today: 1 lbs lost so far, only 7.4 lbs to go!
total exercise for June: 36 hrs, 45 min.
I guess this is my final total for June! Definitely WAY better than any other month this year. I may have even tripled my exercise minutes this month from what my usualper month minutes are...which i don't know, i never calculated!! Last month I calculated that I had 18 hrs and 10 min! So, this doubles last month's total! yay!
Total exercise today: 130 min (60 yoga, 10 bike, 60 treadmill.)
Total Calories: 1660. pretty good. healthy salmon dinner. whole fillet, corn on the cob, salad, one slice of grilled squash.
edit: I'm going to try to eat low cal the next few days...focussing once again on what i did yesterday. I want my overall intake over the past 100 days to only be a little over 1800. I would rather the intake be under 1800, but it's not really possible. It'll take a few more days. but, i think if i eat only 1,000 calories for the next week straight I will end up binging at the end. I don't know. That's what I figure from past experience.
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arg! My plans for the 3 day diet I had have been interrupted. Tonight I will be eating dinner with my family as my grandmother is coming over and I cannot decline. So, foods were good today...but i did splurge a little on lunch and a snack later. So, it's 3:23 and calories are up to 1,010 or so. We're eating salmon I think...which is very healthy, but has a lot of calories. oh well. at least calories for the whole day are not out of this world high!
I'll update tonight.
Progress as of today: 1 lbs lost so far, only 7.4 lbs to go!
total June hours: 34 hours and 35 min
total workout time today: 145 minutes (60 yoga, 45 cardio, 10 bike, 30 weights)
total calories: 1,035 (consisting of different kinds of tofu, juice, kombucha tea sweetened with juice, diet snapple, yogurts, latte)
I am going to eat this diet for 3-7 days, depending. I will most probably switch it up a bit, especially in the drinks department.
I am trying to clean out my digestive system from bulky foods...i've abused it recently.
I really hope to keep this up...obviously not a long term diet. I wouldn't want to live on only this stuff forever, now!
goodnight all!
Progress as of today: 1 lbs lost so far, only 7.4 lbs to go!
YOU CAN DO IT!!!
i'm going on a diet of my own concoction the next few days. It'll be liquid based. I'll let you know how it goes. I need something different to get me unbloated and out of this sorta slump. also, i don't have too many obligation right now, so it's a good time to do it.
total cal: 2700
total june exercise: 32 hrs, 10 min.
total exercise: ......60 yoga. not so good. on my butt all day. but, i did accomplish some work.
...well, i guess it had to come sooner or later.
i splurged on lunch. this time, feeling more in control, bit still opting to overindulge. better luck tomorrow, i suppose.
breakfast calories: 325. Lunch calories: an overwhelming 2241...accomplished through lots of cookies, chips, and peanut butter.
total calories: 2566.
Progress as of today: 1 lbs lost so far, only 2.4 lbs to go!
Now having sympathized with your plight, please... do NOT use your lunch as an excuse to continue bingeing the rest of the day. So you had a big lunch. OK fine. It's done. Move forward. Drink water, green tea. Stay active, busy. Have a light supper. It can still be a good day, HoP!!!
...thanks for the caring comments yesterday. :)
exercise was fabuloso today! (June total = 31 hrs, 10 min) too awesome! I will never be able to fit this kind of exercise in during the year. oh, but that would be nice, wouldn't it!?
total exercise: 160 minutes! yes! (yoga 60, elliptical 60, bike 10, weights 30)
total calories: a cool 1500 on the dot! yay! very happy. i even had a 600 calorie dinner...since i didn't have a snack this afternoon. dinner was complete with a lovely banana filled dessert.
time to practice studying my score and practice my instrument.
it seems i leave these things till the end...which is really a poor plan. well, not really. if i don't get out of the house first thing in the morning, i find myself being unproductive for the rest of the day! so, i guess i'm better off waiting to study till later. at least i got a good deal of exercise in!
Progress as of today: 1 lbs lost so far, only 2.4 lbs to go!
total calories: 1800 i ate all afternoon long. at least it was healthy.
total exercise: 70 min (60 yoga, 10 bike) (June total = 28 hrs, 30 min)
Today's journal entry is to vent.
I lost out on a job I thought i had for sure. I am sad because when i asked the director for feedback on my interviews and demo lesson, she said that my lesson was awesome and i was awesome with the kids. she said that others on the last interview committee (the third round of interviewing) thought i would work better with students who are wealthy and can afford private lessons! wow. that is not at all what i would expect ANYONE to say about me. first of all, i worked with similiar students this year to the job i was applying for, and it was wonderful. they weren't rich and still many took private lessons. also, private lessons do not have to be expensive. you can get the from a high school musician who wants to do it for credits or for school. i'm really upset. i thought i wouldn't have to interview for the rest of the summer! wrong.
oh, and don't get me wrong, i didn't talk about private lessons for a long time or any large portion of the interview. it is a teacher's job to mention an opportunity to take private lessons to their students. so i said that. i'm angry.
Progress as of today: 1 lbs lost so far, only 2.4 lbs to go!
So it's ok to be angry, and I think you have every right to be angry. And disappointed and frustrated. But keep in mind that even though this is the feedback that you got, it may or may not be entirely true and doesn't really reflect on your abilities or your performance at the interview.
total June exercise time: 27 hours, 20 minutes...CRAZY COOL.
Happy Monday!
Exercise: wowsers...150 minutes!!!! yeah, that's right! (60 yoga, 60 cardio, 30 weights)
Calories: 1500 on the dot!
The start of my day has been going well! I had a good breakfast, rode my bike to yoga, and it was a great class! I had a large lunch after yoga, but its already getting late in the day. so, its ok. It was 590 calories. also, i'll be out of the house during a prime time to binge...the early afternoon. so, that won't happen!
now for a different issue: I always like for my weekly average calories to equal 1800 or lower. well, I was really off track for awhile. and, i'm still trying to get the average down for the past 88 days!!! haha, i keep adding each day into the average until it will eventually reach right below 1800 as the average. so, right now, for 88 days, my average is 1873. I wonder how long it will take to reach just under 1800. By the end of the summer, it should definitely be there. Hopefully before that. I keep wanting to just start counting my weekly calories over, but then I'm defeating the purpose of keeping running totals that eventually end when I'm slightly below 1800- like 1798 would be fine. also, once the total average goes down...weight is also lost! there is a reason for my madness.
Progress as of today: 1 lbs lost so far, only 2.4 lbs to go!
I would hope that you could get back to that point. It seemed to me as though your eating (bingeing) was much better (and in control) back then. Perhaps you disagree, which is fine. But if you could have more days like today, that would be great! Or even half a day, either the exercise OR the calories. That would be a good day in my book as well. Keep up the good work!
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It never fails for me - it seems the days I say I am going to really eat low amount of calories I really don't. I think I do better if I just say - I am going to be reasonable. Then, again, sometimes nothing works......it's "just one of those days". Seriously now - if you are 5'2" and 113 pounds - you couldn't be flabby and out of shape - ESPECIALLY with the amount of exercise you do! Sometimes I am too hard on myself because I fear if I am not I won't do what I need to do (I will suddenly get lazy or something), but I have found that a better motivation for me is trying to take care of myself. It is alot less stressful, anyway. You always pull it out of any fire you get in. Just try to make sure you aren't setting the fire!
greengirl on 07/05/2007:
I agree with Hollybelle. Sometimes you seem really hard on yourself. You need to give yourself more credit for all the hard work you put in to your life. Chin up, HoP :o)