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Runner - Sunday Mar 26, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 122.5

Warning---this entry will probably contain a lot of random thoughts!

Okay, friends...first of all, I want you to know what I weighed on Saturday and Sunday. I was thrilled to see 119.5 on Saturday and then 118.5 on Sunday, even after the wedding banquet! I could hardly believe my eyes...and I felt so "thin," for once! Keep in mind that I hadn't seen 118.5 since early January, so I was feeling soooo good that I was finally seeing a loss! I felt like I deserved it, too, because I had eaten well on Friday and worked out for several hours on Saturday...when I wasn't eating, I was MOVING. I was literarally on my feet all day, and that included some serious exercise!

But then Sunday night hit...and I was taken to an incredible (very expensive) buffet---and I enjoyed two plates of food and one plate of dessert. Yes, I ate well, but I only tried to eat those foods that I don't normally get (like brie, dim sum, excellent ice cream, wonderful marinated salads, etc.) I really thought I made smart choices, but I know the cheese and desserts alone would have been enough calories for my entire meal! And then after the meal, my husband and I went for another walk, bringing my total "active" time to about 4 1/2 hours for the day. You would have thought that would be enough to at least keep me from gaining more than 1-2 pounds, but I was a whopping 4 pounds higher this morning.

Yes, I know the food hasn't digested yet...yes, I know that this bloating feeling will go away...yes, I know I'm probably just retaining water. I KNOW all that, and yet I feel incredibly let-down that it will probably take me several days, if not a week or two, to get back to 119.5. And who knows when I'll see 118.5 again?

And don't think that I didn't notice all the other restaurant diners who were pigging out as if there was no tomorrow! They were the ones drinking hundreds of calories in juice or alcohol (I drank water), eating all sorts of fried foods that I chose to ignore, and going back for thirds and fourths. I know for a fact that none of them worked out for 4 hours beforehand, and yet I just wonder---did they wake up 4 pounds heavier? Do they even care? Am I the strange one? (By the way....none of the people I was observing would be considered overweight. How do they do it?)

Okay, enough complaining! I'm back on track today and am sticking to lots of fruits and veggies and water...and hope that I can feel better soon! Because I hate the feeling of a "food hangover."

geevee on 03/26/2006:
Oh, Runner,

It has to be the salt! If so, you'll have at least 3 miserable days until you lose the water weight. Remember my panic after a 3-4lb. gain from the anchovy potatoes? That was a killer!

After tonight's dinner with an Austrian guest I am re-thinking my intake of food. This woman is not slight by any means, and she's definitely unacquainted with volumetrics. It was terrible watching her fill up so soon whereas I was just packing my "normal" salad away. She only ate 1//3 of hers! She left 1/3 of her pork and didn't have any broccoli. I felt like a pig but I was HUNGRY!

By the end of dinner as I was wrapping up leftovers, something that never happens when I eat alone or when I have hearty 6ft.+ giants as guests,it mde me wonder how I've been able to stabilize at 132-3. I guess I shouldn't be complaining after all. I'm questioning how much I eat. Maybe my weight is due to eating too much. But I'm SO hungry!

The interesting thing is that before DD's in my FAT days, I never thought about quantity, appetite, when to eat, all the issues I've been confronted with lately.

I wish I knew the answer.

Hang in there, Runner. You needed to have that good ice cream. Those opportunities are few and far between.

borntocry on 03/27/2006:
Hi there Runner!

Now I can't help but remind you of the comment you made to me just a few days ago when I was stressing out about my trip to the vegetarian restaurant: "But I don't see how it could possibly take you 10 days to work off the excess weight from one meal...are you assuming that you'll consume upwards of 3500 calories?" And now just listen to you - "...it will probably take me several days, if not a week or two, to get back to 119.5". A WEEK OR TWO?! Come on, Runner! Did YOU consume upwards of 3500 calories?!

I know how it is - logic and reason just fly out the window in the face of that ghastly 4 lb gain overnight. You were right to point out how ridiculous it was for me to assume that it would take me ten days to offset the damage caused by just one meal, and now I'm doing the same for you. You HAVEN'T gained 4 lb overnight! If you weighed 118.5 lb on Sunday, then that's probably around what you still weigh now! You maybe gained half a pound of actual weight at that dinner - and that's assuming you really pigged out - but that's it!

And you made the most of it by choosing things you can't enjoy all the time - in my opinion you did a great job! You'll realise that yourself in a couple of your days when your weight is back down - you'll see.

Umpqua on 03/27/2006:
I agree with BTC and Geevee, you'll see that weight come off in a couple of days, it's not a true gain. I saw 124 on Sunday morning after eating 3 small slices of pizza. I know that feeling of horror -- I was so pleased to see 122 on Friday and then it just seems like you've blownit . But my weight's already coming back down and yours will too. The foods sound wonderful, you deserve to enjoy those treats every now and again!

Runner - Thursday Mar 23, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 121.5

Still 121.5! DRAT!

Of course, I deserve it, as I blew it last night while trying to make a mocha brownie dessert for a co-worker's birthday. Much to my dismay, it didn't turn out the way I planned it to, which led to me eating several servings before I got ahold of myself and turned it into a trifle. Thankfully, the trifle was excellent and a big hit today, and I'm just glad it's all gone!!!

I still think my calories were under 1800 for the day, but that's not going to cut it if I want to lose any weight. Sugar is the enemy with my body!!!

I have more hurdles to jump this weekend...a wedding banquet tomorrow night and another big meal at a very fancy hotel on Sunday night.

Although I'm looking forward to these meals, I'm so afraid I'm going to be back at 113 in a matter of a day or two. This is depressing!

borntocry on 03/24/2006:
Hi Runner,

That's so funny - I was just thinking about trifle last night and I almost decided to get up in the middle of the night and make it! And I've never made trifle before, so that's a pretty odd thing for me to think of!

Thanks for the comment you left me. I've done a lot of research on heart rate monitors ever since I got mine, and it seems that they are actually much more accurate than manual pulse readings. Apparently your pulse is just an indication of your true heart rate, and can often be misleading, whereas a real heart rate monitor counts the actual beats of your heart via the electrodes strapped to your chest! Of course, the monitors on exercise equipment like treadmills aren't nearly as accurate, and I have had pretty bizarre readings on those as well.

I do envy you your husband's support when it comes to monitoring your eating habits. My husband is so critical of people who need any help in that department! I remember one time my cousin was over and we were all snacking on some Pringles and then at some point she handed him the can and jokingly asked him to keep it out of her reach. An innocent, typically "girly" thing to do, don't you think? Well, he brought it up again later, when we were alone, and couldn't stop criticising her lack of self-control! And then he's always accusing me of being "addicted" to chocolate. Hello! This is coming from someone who drinks 3 litres of pop a day! And I've actually seen him go out at midnight to get more pop because there's "only" half a 2-litre bottle left! Just because he doesn't <i>need</i> self-control, doesn't mean he has more of it than I do!

Well, good luck this weekend - it sounds like you might need it! I certainly don't envy you that kind of temptation - that's for sure!

Umpqua on 03/24/2006:
Oh, great idea making the trifle. I'll have a similar challenge as today is "ice cream day" for my coworker. I'm going to be strong and absolutely refuse any offers for free ice cream though! Good luck this weekend and I hope you can enjoy your fancy meals out in moderation.

Runner - Wednesday Mar 22, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 121.5

Two pounds in one night, and I feel both of them! UGH! I feel bloated and yucky.

I knew this would happen, though. I enjoyed a great meal out with my husband at a Vegetarian Buffet (I thought of you, BTC!!!), and I paid for it this morning. It's so discouraging when I feel like I take one step forward and three steps back!

This was the kind of buffet where you choose your food and then pay by weight, so I only had only plate of food, but I still chose whatever looked delicious to me and probably went well over my 1500 calorie limit for the day. Of course, most of the food is considered "healthy," but I know I ate more than I should have in one meal.

I'm glad I didn't eat the taro bread as well...I don't deserve that yet! I want to stay at 119.5 for a few days before I give in to that craving!

I made four cakes yesterday for a huge birthday party today...I put them all together to make a big layer cake, and I'll be serving that to about 80 people in a few minutes. The reason I'm telling you this is that I need some accountability! I don't plan on eating more than a small piece (if that) of the cake...instead, I'm eating an apple and a guava right now to keep myself from getting hungry. And I hope there are no leftovers!!!

borntocry on 03/23/2006:
Hi Runner,

I must say, what's truly ironic is that you went to a vegetarian restaurant and pigged out while I stayed at home and made very wise decisions, and yet both of us are 2 lb up!!

Anyway, to answer your question, yes, my husband has been commenting constantly on how my body is "kicking" these days, only he has no idea that I've been watching what I eat - he thinks it's all just from running. You see, he has maintained the same weight his entire adult life without ever watching what he eats, so he assumes that everyone else should be able to do the same. For instance he often remarks on how fat people are just lazy and all they need to do is start playing a sport, and then they could eat whatever they want without a care in the world. He seems quite unable to understand that it's his height and size which enable him to consume in excess of 3000 calories a day without gaining weight. You probably work out three or four times as much as him but what would happen if you started eating large pepperoni pizzas, 2-litre bottles of pop, and entire pints of ice-cream every night?

sweetpea1977 on 03/23/2006:
Like the 119.5, this could be another crazy fluctuation, so dont beat yourself up too much about it. One plate of food is rarely heard of at a buffet, so good for you to sticking to it!

The cake sounds awesome! And of course, its always good to fill yourself up with fruit first. Good work!


Runner - Tuesday Mar 21, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 119.5

This is a big day for me! I finally saw 119.5! I haven't seen that number since January, and I almost didn't believe the scale this morning when I saw that beautiful number. Now, back in September, that was NOT a beautiful number, but it's amazing how my perspective changed when I started seeing 122 and 123! All of a sudden, 119.5 looked VERY nice.

Originally, I was planning to reward myself with a nice piece of taro bread when I hit 119.5, but I'm going to hold off for awhile. I have a meal out tonight with my husband, so I need to save that fattening taro bread for another day...and I want to make sure that this weight isn't just a mere fluctuation. I want to make some actual progress here!

The good thing is that I think I've been eating around 1500 calories a day. Why is the weight coming off now? Well, I really think it's due to not taking any hormone pills the last two weeks. When I went off birth control two years ago, I dropped five pounds rather quickly. So I think my body just doesn't respond well to that stuff. Of course, just because I'm taking a break now doesn't mean I can avoid that stuff forever...but I'd rather be back to about 117 before I start taking them again!!!

borntocry on 03/22/2006:

Way to go, Runner! Well done!

You know, people often say that it's a bad idea to use food as a reward, but I haven't found that to be a problem because once I reach my goal, I usually find that I no longer care quite so much about whatever treat it is I had planned for myself as a reward. The feeling of pride and accomplishment at having reached my goal is often enough of a reward!

Thanks for the comment you left me. Yes, I often remind myself of how "even Runner" finds speedwork hard. But of course, you don't really need to improve your speed, whereas I do! I have read, though, that most runners do speedwork together, as it's so difficult to do it alone. My husband has offered to do it with me this summer, once his basketball season is over. Hopefully that will work out pretty well for us because he is much faster than I am (although I'd like to think that by this point I have more endurance for the longer distances at least!).

I also did some research on running hills, and you're right, the fact that my heart rate drops when I run uphill is probably an indication that I am slowing down. And apparently that totally negates any benefit of running uphill, so I'm going to have to make sure I don't do that from now on.

And yes, I recently discovered that buttermilk is in fact available here - apparently it is used in Arabic cooking and there is a huge Arab community here. It turns out that I had seen it all the time but never knew what it was because the label is all in Arabic! There is a French translation which says, "lait ferment�", but I never made the connection between "fermented milk" and buttermilk. In recipes calling for buttermilk I just used a mixture of two parts milk to one part yogurt, which is a pretty good substitute. But once I discovered that I could buy buttermilk here, of course I had to get it and now I'm trying to use it up! There's only a little bit left now, and I have a feeling buttermilk cornbread might just be on the agenda!

Sweetpea1977 on 03/22/2006:
Congrats on the 119.5! Even if it is a fluctuation, at least you know that getting there can be done. Yay!

It sounds like 1500 calories might be the magic number in keeping your metabolism up while allowing to lose. I always feel that anything below that number would not be sufficient for someone as athletic as you. An active person must take in more calories than the average person to keep their metabolism up.

Yes, coming off of those fertility drugs has helped you as well. Those hormone treatments are known to cause weight gain and other extreme side effects, so keep this experience in mind when you decide to go back on the fertility treatments. :o)

I admire you for holding off on that taro bread. Thats great!

Anyway, keep up the good work. You are doing great!


PS. Regarding your "fat dog" quote. So cute! There is no surprise on why she was gaining weight because I quit taking her on my 2 mile runs. She makes a lot of potty stops and owns a wonderfully curious nose! But, from now on, she goes with me. Oh well, her health is more important to me than improving my speed.

PPS. I almost forgot! Yes, I used LF buttermilk in my Irish Soda Bread. Im glad yours turned out well.

geevee on 03/22/2006:
Way to go, Runner! I'd feel the same way if I saw 129.5 which is not about to happen, darn it!

Umpqua on 03/22/2006:
Congratulations, you're kicking butt! It must feel so good to break into the teens. Even if it is a flux, your weight has definitely been going down steadily and you deserve it. I've always weighed more when I've been on hormonal birth control, so I'm guessing that has something to do with it too. BTW, I only got my hair cut to shoulder length, so it's not a huge change. I'd wanted it a bit shorter and a slightly different style, so now I'm in the process of searching for a new hairdresser!

Runner - Tuesday Mar 21, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 120.5

Thanks for all your comments, friends! Unfortunately, I don't have much time to write or comment myself, so I'm typing like a maniac right now.

I have good news and bad news.

The good news---I stayed far away from the marshmallow fluff yesterday. Didn't even touch it.

The bad news---temptation came in the form of amazingly delicious Chinese pastries that were delivered to my office. I could not believe how good they were, and I can only imagine how highly caloric. They were high-quality moon cakes, filled with sweet fillings, like green bean and red bean and pineapple. Yes, I know green bean doesn't sound sweet, but this isn't the kind of green bean Americans are familiar with. Anyway, to make a long story short, I had far too many "bites and tastes," and I sacrificed eating a healthy dinner for those little samples I couldn't resist!

I'm so suprised I didn't see an immediate gain on the scale, except that I know I'll see it eventually if I'm not super-careful.

So far so good today.

But I have a get-together with a bunch of women tonight, and one of them is bringing snacks! (She works for a local bakery, so I can only imagine what we'll have...let's hope I can say "NO" to second helpings!)

I can do this! I want to see 119.5! I want to get back into the teens!!!

borntocry on 03/21/2006:
Hi Runner,

I got scared when I read about your "bad news", so I was relieved to see that it wasn't that bad after all! You traded your healthy dinner for some delicious pastries which you don't get all the time, and you maintained your weight. Nothing wrong with that! I was just thinking this morning about how glad I am that I declined the croissants my co-workers brought in last week, because I can have those any time, whereas if it had been something more special I might have regretted passing it up.

Of course, the next time something like that happens, you could always save your share of pastries for me! ;)

Thanks for the comment you left me. Yes, I've noticed that it generally takes me around 9-10 days to work off even the slightest lapse in my diet. For instance I've only just now managed to get my weight back to where it was before I went to that vegetarian restaurant the last time - and that was on my birthday, 11 days ago. You know it's not really about consuming an excess of 3500 calories or however much they say equals a pound of weight - after all, you haven't been eating that much more since last year, have you?

And as for the half-marathon in Berlin, you know as well as I do that it will probably lead to another 2 lb gain all on its own, just like the last one did! Sigh...

Maria7 on 03/21/2006:
I know it's hard to resist goodies brought into an office! Good for you on the marshmellow fluff!

Runner - Sunday Mar 19, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 120.5

Was still at 120 yesterday, but back to 120.5 today. I did fine with the food yesterday, except when I opened up a jar of Marshmallow Fluff that I bought in the Philippines. Call me crazy, but I can eat that stuff by the spoonful! And it's even better mixed with peanut butter or chocolate...

At 45 calories/ spoonful, I did a little damage right there. I should never have bought the stuff, but it was a total impulse buy! At least I waited 5 weeks to open it. But I think I'm going to either duct tape the lid shut so I can't eat it all or I'll hide it or something. I don't need any more temptations in my way!

I'm so eager to see 119.5 that I don't want to allow myself to binge on sweet things my body doesn't need! I already feel pretty good at 120.5, but some of my pants are still snug enough to remind me that a couple more pounds gone would be even better!

borntocry on 03/20/2006:
Hi Runner,

I'm always doing that - buying things which I know are too dangerous to have lying around and then hoarding them for months and months because I know what will happen once I open them! You should duct tape the lid shut - I do that all the time, with everything! It doesn't keep me out of something indefinitely, but it's good at limiting second helpings, you know? Also, if you eat it by the spoon, have just one spoonful and then throw the spoon in the sink (preferably full of dirty dishes). Eventually you run out of clean spoons!

Another thing - do try to keep the jar out of sight somewhere. I've always been skeptical of this approach because I never forget what snacks I have in the house, but somehow, it's been working for me recently. I bought a packet of sour cream and onion mini rice cakes the other day and accidentally tossed them on a ledge behind the oven. I keep meaning to have them, but when I'm at home looking for something to snack on, I never see them, so I never remember they're there!

Runner, you are doing so well! The marshmallow fluff will keep for another day!

Thanks for the comment you left me. You know, I've actually been wishing we lived in the same place, so that you could try out my heart rate monitor! I'm really curious to see what your heart rate is! I just can't imagine someone running so fast with such a low heart rate. Speaking of running up hills, I noticed the other day that my heart rate actually seems to go down when I run uphill and up when I run downhill. That doesn't make any sense to me, because even though I probably slow down a bit when I go uphill and speed up when I go downhill, it's only because it's so much harder to go uphill! So shouldn't my heart rate be constant?

And yes, that was a Dr Soy Double Fudge Brownie Low-Carb bar I had the other day - the FIRST one you sent me, not the second one! I had been saving it all this time - can you believe it? And it was SO good, I almost just went ahead and had the second one the very next day! But I'm going to save it for a special treat, when I really deserve it!

Umpqua on 03/20/2006:
It definitely seems like you're steadily losing the weight, and I know what you mean about breaking through that 120 barrier - I can't wait! I have the same problem with ice cream as you do with the peanut butter and marshmallow fluff. I actually avoided buying the light mint chocolate chip when I went shopping yesterday because I know I can't control myself with it.

geevee on 03/20/2006:
I'm not such a big fan of marshmellow, but, combine it with chocolate and PNB and I'd totally lose!That sounds SO good!

BTC's comment about spoonsful reminded me of those carefree days of childhood when I'd eat as many as I wanted of PNB and also condensed milk. I couldn't get enough of it.

I have some unopened chocolate in my stash tempting me daily. It is out of sight, but I know it's there.

sweetpea1977 on 03/20/2006:
Hey Runner,

Oh my gosh do I LOVE that jar of Marshmallow heaven! I can only imagine how good it tastes with PB and/chocolate! Sigh...

Anyway, you did very well for staying away from it for 5 weeks straight. Lets try to go another 5 weeks without it! :o)


Runner - Friday Mar 17, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 120.0

Yesterday, I was 122.

Today I was 120.

I'll take it!!!

I feel so much better at 120...but this constant two-pound flux has only helped to confirm my theory that eating a lot of food (especially carbs) at night leads to a gain in the morning. Of course, I've probably known that all along, but lately, I've been able to predict almost perfectly when my weight will be "up" and when it will be "down." I've been eating about 1500 calories (give or take a few) every day, but have fluctuated from 120 to 121 to 122 and then back to 120 in one week, and both times I have been 120, I ate the majority of my "carb" calories earlier in the day.

Well, anyway...even though I'm 120 today and feeling very good, I have to be quite careful, as my husband and I are going to a little Chinese town this afternoon that is famous for all it's free snacks and delicious food! Uh-oh! I'm really looking forward to seeing the town, but I just hope I can go very easy on all the free samples...'cause I'm a sucker for free samples!

borntocry on 03/18/2006:
Hi Runner!

Way to go! You might be too caught up in the flux to notice this, but it looks to me like your weight really is going down after all. I hope your trip to the Chinese town goes well... if not, do some damage control over the rest of the day/weekend! I don't know if you will read this before you leave, but yesterday I turned down free food at work for the first time EVER! And if I can do it, so can you!

Thank you for the comment you left me... I was actually hoping you would read what I had written to Jenny! Yes, my weight is generally 1-2 lb lower when I get home from work than in the morning! But somehow I feel like it would be cheating to go by that number, especially on days that I run home from work, because the lower reading could be just due to dehydration after running, you know? Although in the past, when I didn't own a scale, I did always weigh myself right after running, and I was probably way more dehydrated in those days because I never drank anything.

But Jenny also pointed out the fact that I eat most of my calories at night, so yesterday I was thinking about it and I realised that it's true... I've basically been starving myself at work so that I can pretty much eat all I want at night! That's not right, and I know it's just an easy way out for me, because there's less food available for me to eat at work than there is at home. But I think you guys are right and I'm going to change my eating habits somewhat. It will mean that I may actually have to exercise some self-control in the evenings from now on but I hope I can do it!

Runner - Wednesday Mar 15, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 121.0

Man, I really lost it today! I had a great day yesterday...but completely went off the deep end today! Last night I made some blueberry muffins for my co-workers and melted some chocolate on the tops of them. Thankfully, I didn't eat any of them (last night) and thought I would be fine this morning, until I cut one in half to see if it looked dry, and was appalled to find that it did! Well, before I could give it away, I had to taste it, so what happened next is that a little binge-fest incurred, which included me eating the tops of almost all 11 muffins and throwing the rest of the muffins away. Is that pathetic or what? I'm so ashamed to admit this, but I feel like I need to. I am just a terrible dieter, compared to all of you! Sometimes I just completely lose it...I can't even make it two days on a 1200-calorie diet!

But wait---it gets worse. I had a lunch out with a co-worker and tried to find something healthy...so I settled on 6 pieces of salmon sashimi, which is probably more highly-caloric than it sounds, and a bunch of marinated kombu seaweed. I should have stopped there, but I allowed myself to walk by the sweet taro bread, and in a moment of weakness, I bought a big piece. Now, I had made a pact with myself not to have this taro bread until I hit 119.5, and I still have 1 1/2 pounds to go, but I ate it anyway. It was soooo good, but soooo highly caloric! I have no idea how many calories are in it, but I'm sure I don't really want to know!

So. It's all of 1:30pm and I've already done enough damage today that I don't think I'll be seeing 119.5 for awhile. But instead of counting the whole day as a loss and eating like a pig tonight, I'm simply going to have some fruits and veggies before bed and call it a day. I hope. If any more temptation comes my way, I'm afraid I won't be able to resist it!

I know that some of you may feel like you'll never be a "fast runner" like I am, but at the moment, I'd trade in my athleticism for a big dose of your self-control around food!

sweetpea1977 on 03/16/2006:
Hey Runner,

Everyone has bad days, so you aren't the only "terrible dieter"! I tend to do very well on the weekdays thanks to a lack of time to stuff my face. The weekends are what kill me. I have two days of free time to do anything I want!! I still have issues with overindulging/binging, which sometimes give me horrible stomach pains. So dont you worry, you are not alone!

Oh, to answer your question - the only LF peanut butter I can enjoy right now is creamy Jif. I know, still not very low calorie, but its the only PB I like. I try to use at most the recommended serving size, but I can usually be satified with less. It all depends on the size of bread Im putting it on! Anyway, Im still looking for a healthier choice, so if I find one, I will let you know!


borntocry on 03/16/2006:
Hi Runner,

Don't be silly - you're no worse at dieting than anyone else. I have to be so careful about baking and even cooking things like soup because of my lack of control in the kitchen. I actually scale down all my recipes so I only ever make one serving at a time, and you can imagine how ridiculous that gets, when I'm measuring out a quarter of an egg and looking for a pan small enough to bake one piece of cornbread! I felt really bad last week when it was my birthday and all of my co-workers were so nice to me, but I hadn't brought anything in to celebrate. Of course there were all kinds of treats I had wanted to make but I just couldn't trust myself to do it.

The same goes for you - you need to put a hold on your baking for a few weeks. Or at least stick to things you've made many times before and are sure will turn out right. I know you like to get inventive in the kitchen but now's not the time for it! It sucks that our husbands and co-workers should have to miss out because we have so little self-control, but it would suck even more to end up secretly blaming them for making us fat.

Thanks for the comment you left me. 3 tbsp dry beans makes about half a cup, which is around 125 calories by my reckoning - there's 250 in a whole cup! And I also generally don't count calories in things like tomatoes - I'm just getting paranoid! But you're right, there's probably no point to this vigilance, when I'm not even losing any weight like this. In fact I'm barely even maintaining my weight, and on 1200 calories a day and 20 miles a week, that's a scary thought!

And no, I've never tried using tofu in lasagne - what a great idea! Unfortunately my husband won't stand even the slightest deviation to my regular recipe, which is loaded with fatty cream sauce and mozzarella cheese! I once tried using ricotta instead and he didn't like it! So I'm really not even tempted by it any more - it just doesn't taste good enough to me to be worth all those calories. And I'd have to have such a tiny serving, whereas I had two big bowls of my white bean and pasta casserole!

I might try that tofu lasagne for myself some day, though. What's the recipe?

As for fruit, I've been choosing vegetables over fruit these days because they're more filling and lower-calorie. So I generally only have one fruit a day. Yesterday I had four different kinds, but in really small servings - half a banana, half a kiwi fruit, half a mandarin orange and two strawberries. Just another sacrifice on the altar of weight loss!

Oh and I do love guava - can't get it here, though!

geevee on 03/16/2006:
We know what we need to do to lose weight. Our gigantic problem is staying on track. I, too, can do so well but only for a limited time and then I lose. This has been a bad week for me too. Maybe envisioning our original FAT selves and seriously believing that we're on our back there, will help. Something has to!

Umpqua on 03/16/2006:
After eating anything I felt like for 2 solid week, I don't feel like I've been practicing self control around food! I'm ready to get back on track though, and it looks like I've got a few more pounds than you to lose. I'm sorry to hear your IUI didn't work out. It sounds like you have a positive attitude about it though, and are just focusing on eating right and exercising, very healthy! I'm also glad to hear your back has healed and you'll be able to run again, that's excellent news!

Runner - Wednesday Mar 15, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 121.5

Still at 121.5, but hanging on by the skin of my teeth!

My friend and I are doing a 3-day "NO SUGAR" challenge. I've tried this before, but I rarely last more than about 2 days. But I really want to do this, and it helps to have someone else do it with me.

I'm concentrating on fruits and veggies, lean proteins, and only complex whole grain carbs. Of course, there's probably some sugar in some of my whole grain carbs, but I don't overeat that kind of food. I overeat sweet things like brownies and candy, so that's the food I need to stay away from.

I'm also staying away from the peanut butter...and hoping that 3 days of healthy food and 1200 calories per day will result in at least another 1/2 pound loss! I'm itching to get back to 120! And then to make it into the teens. It's got to be possible! I won't give up!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course, the scale will probably NOT reflect my good intentions right away. I've been playing this game long enough to know that simply having a "good day" doesn't mean anything to Mr. Scale!!!

borntocry on 03/15/2006:
Hi Runner,

I think your 3-day no-sugar challenge is a great idea! I know you've attempted such challenges in the past, and I was never too enthusiastic because I didn't want you to deprive yourself too much. But since then, I have really cut down on sugar myself and I can tell you, I feel a lot healthier. I actually find myself craving salty things more than sweet things these days, and that is just totally unlike me. Plus, it's a lot easier to keep the calories low when you stick to mostly vegetables and proteins. I know I've been complaining a lot lately about how hungry I am, but I also know there's no way I could ever have done this well for this long in the past.

The peanut butter is a tough one, though... that's something I just can't have in the house. So good luck with that!

Thanks so much for the comment you left me. I was actually a little worried that you might think I was dreadfully slow the other day, but you've encouraged me so much! I know I'll never be in your league - the major league! - but then I started a lot later than you and there's always that possibility of putting everything on hold at some point in the near future to start a family. So I'm just having fun competing against myself for now!

Oh and I loved what you said about how I'll probably see a loss when I least expect it, like after a 2500-calorie day or something! That's so true, isn't it? I do also worry about slowing down my metabolism, but I'm hoping my occasional splurges will take care of that. I would actually rather just follow a more moderate diet all the time, but I have a tendency to go overboard when faced with temptation so I feel like I have to keep my calories extra low the rest of the time to balance it out. I'm just lucky I don't eat out much, so I'm not faced with temptation very often. You have to deal with it a lot more often than I do!

sweetpea1977 on 03/15/2006:
Good luck on your sugar-free challenge. The good part is that you have a friend doing it with you, which will make it easier to stay accountable for what you eat. Your food plan sounds awesome, so I have faith that you will succeed with flying colors.

monet0239 on 03/15/2006:
How was the shower hun? good I hope.. did you do good with that angel food cake? I hope so... good luck with your no sugar.. :O).. its not to hard once you get used to it.. and trust me I have a sweet tooth.. actually all my teeth love sweets..lol..

you hang in there.. you'll get down in those teens.. :O).. have a great day hun.. hugs

Runner - Monday Mar 13, 2006
(Under 1300 calories)
Weight: 121.5

One pound down. I'll take it, but once again, I'm not holding my breath. Even though I'm making wise choices with food, I know that weight loss is a SLOW process. Fluctuations aside, it takes awhile to actually lose a pound, especially at my weight.

I have a bridal shower today and I prepared all of the food for it. Now, if I can just stay away from most of it, I'll be fine! :) Actually, though, the majority of the food is healthy and low-calorie...the theme for the party was built around health and fitness. The only really tempting part is the angel-food-pudding-whipped-cream-with-strawberries trifle that I made...and I had a nice little serving for breakfast, so I'm not feeling like I'm off to a good start so far!

borntocry on 03/14/2006:
Hi Runner,

You're getting there, slowly but surely!

Thanks for the (second) comment you left me yesterday. I do know what you mean about needing a good night's sleep before work. I'm sure my performance at work has really suffered since I started my 1200-calorie plan! Luckily it's a contract I don't really care about so I don't feel too bad, but if it was something more important I don't think I could afford to feel tired and hungry all the time. And of course I've also been doing the "volumetrics" thing at night and it really does help. I'm sure it is part of the reason for some of our fluctuations but it's still worth it!

As for my next race, it's on April 2nd. I'm not sure what time - I think 10:00 a.m. It's funny how I'm so blas� about this race, whereas I was totally obsessed with the last one and freaking out about it for weeks in advance!

You've asked me before whether I'm a competitive person, and I've always avoided the question, because it's kind of a tough one to answer. You see, when I was younger, I was extremely competitive. I had to be the best at everything. If I couldn't be the best at something, I just didn't do it. Well that was fine up until a certain point. Then things changed. Boys became bigger and stronger, so I couldn't challenge them to races and arm-wrestling matches any more. The level of competition at school got fiercer and I couldn't just breeze through like I used to. I got into an Ivy League university and chose to major in a subject I knew nothing about. I met my husband and he was also used to being the best at everything - and much better than me! Eventually I realised that I had stopped doing things I liked because I couldn't handle losing. So I decided to change my way of thinking entirely. I adopted a more laidback attitude to life. I decided to be more adventurous and try new things, even things I knew I wouldn't be good at it. In fact, that's one reason I wanted to run a half-marathon. When I was younger I was a sprinter, but I had never been able to run long distances. I knew it would be really tough for me, but I wanted to do it to prove to myself that I could.

When I told my Dad about my half-marathon, the first thing he asked me was, "What was your position?" My heart sank when I read that because I knew he was expecting me to have excelled at the half-marathon just like I did at everything else when I was a child. When I told him my position he didn't comment on it at all. I know he thought it was really bad. That hurt a little, but on the other hand I also know that no matter what I do, I'm not going to be winning any Olympic medals for running. So why not just have fun with it?

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