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Runner - Saturday Apr 02, 2005

Weight: 112.0

Somehow I saw 112 this morning...even after a meal out of Indian food last night. I really didn't eat that much, as four of us shared about 5 dishes...but I know that some of the sauces were very highly caloric!! Thankfully, though, the portions were fairly small, so even though I felt somewhat ripped off, at least I wasn't able to overeat!

I need an extra dose of discipline on weekends...I always feel entitled to extra "snacks" or goodies since my weight is usually down. I already enjoyed one of my favorite snacks today and will likely have ice cream tonight with my hubby, so I plan to go lightly the rest of the day.

The weather here is getting so hot...I waited until 8am to go running today, and it was already over 80 degrees. I came back a sweaty mess. That's probably why I weighed 112! I know I lost some water weight!

borntocry on 04/02/2005:
Hi Runner,

I often find when I go to restaurants here that I have that same confusing mix of resentment at being ripped off, and relief at the reduced potential for overeating!

Unfortunately Indian food does tend to be very greasy, especially at restaurants. I think your best bet would be to avoid anything which has a sauce, since the sauces are loaded with grease. You could try sticking to the kebabs and chicken tikka (not the chicken tikka masala, which, incidentally, is not a traditional Indian dish, but was invented at a restaurant in England in the seventies, in response to English customers who demanded "gravy" with their chicken tikka!). You could also get mint sauce or raita (yoghurt) on the side. As for vegetables, those are also generally cooked in a lot of greasy sauce, although you could try the dal (lentils) which should be a little healthier. Unfortunately naan (if made properly) contains a lot of butter, egg and milk and might not be the best choice - how about tandoori roti? That's usually made from plain wholewheat flour and water, and it's pretty good.

To answer your question on the protein bars... I've tried a couple of French brands and both of them are 117 calories per bar or 234 per "meal", which consists of two bars. But these may not be the same kind of thing that you have. I was expecting something kind of like the "power bars" (I think that's what they were called) which I used to have in America. These are kind of the shape and size of Twix bars, and have a sort of fudgy texture. I think the brand I have at the moment is called Gerlinea, but I'm sure it's a French brand which you won't find anywhere else!

geevee on 04/02/2005:
Thanks so much for your prayers. I do need them. And after going to Lourdes TWICE, Guadalupe, oh, and I can't recall the three other shrines in Spain and Portugal, but I fully believe in the power of prayer. You have to be there to observe others who are deeply into it. It's in the air. There is a special electricity; a feeling that you don't get elsewhere. I remember my son, the one who's in Japan, who commented about what he felt at Lourdes at age 14. EVentually he became a Catholic, and I'm sure in the back of his mind was the experience at Lourdes.

The ironic part of the story is that the family in front of us with the blind son, was urging him to touch the stone at the crucial place. What was important was the faith that the pilgrims had in the power to heal. It's been proven.

So thank you for your prayers. Hopefully my condition is not as serious as I have imagined it to be.

Umpqua on 04/03/2005:
Hi Runner, thanks for your encouragement. I fully intend to buckle down this week so I don't sabotage my new low weight. My goal is 115, but since I know I fluctuate about 3 pounds EVERY week without fail, I'd like to get down to 112, where you are. That way, if my top weight is 115 at the beginning of the week, I won't feel bad about it. I'd like 115 to be my guideline for when I have to start "watching it"...I'm just under 5 ft 3 so I don't think this low weight is unreasonable, and it's certainly within my healthy BMI. And I look to your success in maintaining it for all this time and it drives me on!

Runner - Thursday Mar 31, 2005

Weight: 112.5

Woah! I am shocked and surprised to see that I'm still at the same weight as I was last week! I really thought those extra meals out would add up...maybe they will at some point, but all my exercise must have paid off!

I've been thinking a lot about what Borntocry said in her last entry...about how life is just too short to deprive ourselves of things that we love! I struggle with this issue, as I have a hard time exercising self-control around foods I love. But I think I've made some progress in the last 2 years and am now able to keep candy and other goodies in my cupboards for weeks at a time. I still have those "trigger foods" like brownies, peanut butter, and frosting, but I just try to avoid them as much as possible. However, I do hope I can get to the point where I can bake brownies and eat only one...and not have to give them all away so I don't consume half the pan!

It seems like people either fall into one of two categories in the way they eat: careless or overly conscientious. The careless people eat whatever they want whenever they're hungry...if a meal is served to them, they eat it. If they're not hungry for 10 hours, they don't eat. They don't obsess about calories and they don't read nutrition labels. Some of the are overweight, but many of them are normal weights.

The overly conscientious eaters (like me) THINK about food all the time, PLAN meals, COUNT calories, OBSESS about weight, and STRUGGLE with eating too much! Some overly conscientious eaters are overweight, as all they can think about is eating...and some are underweight, as all they can think about is eating, even thought they're on a permanent diet. Most people at normal weights don't seem to be too concerned about their diet. They are happy with their weight and don't want to spend time worrying about what they put in their mouths.

Anyway, maybe none of this makes sense. It's just a few observations I've made. I can usually spot whether a person is careless or conscientious right away...especially if I dine out with others. I envy those who order whatever they want and eat until they're full. I tend to order the healthiest option and eat the whole thing. At the end of the meal, we've probably consumed the same amount of calories. One of these days, I'm going to learn how to eat ANYTHING in moderation. I'll still be a healthy eater...because I love healthy foods...but I want to learn how to eat ONE piece of pizza and be satisified with that. Instead, I have avoided pizza for 7 years. (Unless I make it myself)

Okay, enough rambling. Time to catch up on your entries! The overly conscientious eater is signing off!

borntocry on 04/01/2005:
Hi Runner,

I like your definition of the different types of eaters. It's very true. I think many of us start out as careless eaters and then due to (real or imagined) weight problems we become conscientious eaters. At least, that was the case with me. Until the age of fifteen I was not interested in food at all. I could eat huge amounts of something I liked or I could eat next to nothing for days on end, without giving it a thought. Everything changed once I started to worry that I was fat. Since then I have been obsessed with food. That obsession led to my interest in cooking and that in turn led to my decision to become vegetarian. And yet I weigh a lot more now, as a conscientious eater, than I did as a careless eater. (Of course, age has something to do with that! I am a lot older now as well.)

Runner - Thursday Mar 31, 2005

Weight: 112.5

Hello, friends! I'm back home after a week of traveling! Surprisingly, the food temptations weren't as bad as I thought they would be! I think I managed to do fine...and didn't snack as much! Of course, as soon as I got home, I felt like eating everything in sight. All my favorite goodies...all my favorite snacks...peanut butter...

I made a healthy dinner and then ate a good 500 calories (minimum) in junk-type food...a chocolate-covered cherry, some peanut butter, a graham cracker, some pudding, etc. Funny how I can be disciplined while I'm "on the road," and then lose it at home! At least I'm not baking tonight. I passed up that temptation and mopped the floors instead!

Anyway, after a week away and some meals out (not to mention my snack attack tonight!!!), I'm not counting on seeing 112.5 tomorrow morning!

113.5 or 114 is probably more like it...

I'll post in 12 hours with my updated weight. Hopefully it's not too far "up!"

cynthia on 03/31/2005:
Welcome home Missy! I know you had a great time. So what, you had a little binge party. Hope you enjoyed it ... now, it's back to basics. Have a great day! Cynthia

Runner - Sunday Mar 27, 2005

Weight: 112.5

Okay, I think I made it past the big hurdles, food-wise. I still have 3 more days before I go home, but the next few meals should give me more freedom in deciding what I want to eat.

I ate at one of my favorite restaurants last night...an amazing Thai place. Everything was sooo delicious. I ate the dishes without feeling guilty, as it was a very special occasion. I know it was quite a few more calories than normal, but I've continued to exercise every day and have cut back on snacks. I'm also taking it easy today...no big meals! I need a day of salad, fruit, and veggies.

borntocry on 03/29/2005:
Hi Runner! Thanks for your comment. Actually I had no idea baking was so much harder in a toaster oven. No wonder I often find myself cursing recipes for inaccurate baking times!

My husband and I are moving to a new place this year and I am really looking forward to having a proper oven and a freezer! Every time I have a fiasco in the kitchen, it's going to go straight into that freezer, never to be seen again! Okay, maybe I'm being a bit too optimistic here, but still...!

Maria7 on 03/29/2005:
Good for you!!! Have a great day!

Runner - Sunday Mar 27, 2005

Weight: 112.5

I have no idea what my weight is. According to the cheap scale at the place I'm at right now, I'm 118. Yeah, right. I know I didn't gain 6 pounds overnight. But whenever I see high numbers like that, I doubt my own scale!!! Anyway, I've had more food that normal with all these meals out, but I'm managing to avoid dessert at least! I'm trying to concentrate on veggies and lean meats, but everything is always so oily! Ugh!

Happy Easter, everyone! I love Easter, even if it's not really celebrated here! He is Risen, just as He said!! I serve a Risen Savior!

inmorning on 03/27/2005:
Halleluja He has risen. And because of that we have hope.

Maria7 on 03/27/2005:
Yes, He is Risen, just as He said! I, too serve a risen Savior, Jesus Christ! Praise the Lord! Happy Easter!

squiggly on 03/27/2005:
It is hard to trust scales when they fluctuate badly. Pay attention to your clothes they tell the full story.

Cynthia on 03/27/2005:
Don't ya just love it that you can't stand the taste of anything too oily? Girl, I serve him too! Cynthia

Runner - Thursday Mar 24, 2005

Weight: 112.5

Somehow I managed to drop a half pound, even though I had a mini binge last night. I made some chocolate chip muffins and ate a big one right out of the oven (250 calories), which wouldn't have been so bad, except that I grabbed several handfulls of chocolate chips and ate those, too! Does anyone know how many calories are in one chocolate chip? I know that there are 70 calories in one tablespoon, but how many chips can really fit in one tablespoon? I was trying to figure it out...and tried to find some information on the Internet, but was unable to locate just what I'm looking for.

I hate it when exact numbers aren't given. Nutrional labels are sometimes hard to figure out. I mean, why can't they say how many chocolate chips I can eat to equal 70 calories? Then I would at least have an idea of how many calories I consumed!!!

Anyway...that's such a minor thing. I have a much harder time reading Chinese food labels. Servings are always 100 grams or 100 mL, so I have to do all this conversion math in my head. I mean, a package could have 250 grams total of something, so I have to figure out how much of the product is 100 grams. It gives me a real headache sometimes!

Yeah, I know 99.9% of people don't care about things like that...but I didn't lose 40 pounds to gain it all back! I HAVE to care about things like that! I can't be ignorant! Especially in a foreign country, where the most popular ingredient in snack foods is partially hydrogenated vegetable oil.

Okay, on to another subject...I'm leaving for a week on another business trip. Challenges, challenges...always more challenges! I have a meal out tonight, two meals out tomorrow, and a meal out on Sunday! Okay, I can't panic. No panicking allowed. I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. Discipline, exercise, and planning ahead will help me. I've done it a zillion times already, so I can do it again.

Umpqua on 03/24/2005:
Runner, you are so diligent, I can't see you slipping even with your travel challenges! Those chocolate chips aren't all that bad for you, they are considerably lower in fat and calories than other snacks. I do understand wanting to know the caloric breakdown in everything you eat - foods are so bad here that I often just prefer to come up with my own snacks...

borntocry on 03/25/2005:
Hi Runner,

I can totally relate to your problem with nutrition labels! French nutrition labels are the same way. Not only do they always list the nutritional information for 100 grams of the product, and not for a tablespoon or a cup or a serving, but then they sometimes list the actual amount of the product by volume instead of by weight! What good does it do me to know how many calories are in 100 grams of soup when the soup comes in a 600 ml package? I have to just assume that 100 ml = 100 grams, which may often be the case but why can't they just use the same system of measurement?

Anyway, thanks for your comment. Yes, I am planning to weigh myself again - on the 13th of April, before my next trip to London. Unfortunately I can't weigh myself without clothes on because I don't have a scale! I have to go to the pharmacy to weigh myself. My husband and I are going to be moving into a new apartment this year and we'll have a much bigger bathroom, so maybe then I'll buy a scale. My husband is against it, though. He doesn't want me becoming obsessed with the number on the scale!

geevee on 03/25/2005:
Hi Runner,

Oh, those nasty delicious chocolate chips! My bag of double chocolate Ghirardelli chips says there are 70 calories in 16 chips, or about 5 per chip. Sounds so innocent, but how deceiving! I have a half a bag staring me in the face and somehow I'm just not into chocolate this week. The evening smoothie has done the trick for me.

I find it amazing how you are able to eat out so frequently and yet maintain your weight. All your tricks pay off. Eternal vigilance!

geevee on 03/26/2005:
Oh, Runner. Why are others so reluctant to accept the fact that one wants to be slim? Why must they try to sabotage one's plans? This latest excerpt from my son's email is so clear about how he wants my diet to fail. I just don't understand his thinking. You've had to contend with this problem. Perhaps you can enlighten me.

Tonight we are working on cheesecake and what Miho likes to call "adult pie". She named it "adult pie" because it has coffee in it and I didn't have a name for it. That was the first thing she came up with. Anyway listen to these ingredients: creamcheese pie crust, chocolate chips, crushed coffee beans, walnuts, maple syrup/egg mixture and coconut. It essentially becomes a very dense and highly-fattening candy bar that no human being can resist. I will make this for you just to see you lose all your discipline and to destroy your too-carefuly designed diet. (I'd like to KILL him!) The cheesecake is a new experience for me. And my greatest concern is that it will be too easy to make and be too tasty. What if it is easy enough to make every week? What if I can eat some every day? How will I ever be able to resist it? And if not, then how will I avoid becoming a glutten. (Is there any irony between this statement and the last paragraph?) Anyway, the cookbook has been fairly reliable with some outstanding recipes. So, in all likelihood, it is going to be a disasterously successful and fattening experience. Will let you know.

Tonight we are working on cheesecake and what Miho likes to call "adult pie". She named it "adult pie" because it has coffee in it and I didn't have a name for it. That was the first thing she came up with. Anyway listen to these ingredients: creamcheese pie crust, chocolate chips, crushed coffee beans, walnuts, maple syrup/egg mixture and coconut. It essentially becomes a very dense and highly-fattening candy bar that no human being can resist. I will make this for you just to see you lose all your discipline and to destroy your too-carefuly designed diet.

The cheesecake is a new experience for me. And my greatest concern is that it will be too easy to make and be too tasty. What if it is easy enough to make every week? What if I can eat some every day? How will I ever be able to resist it? And if not, then how will I avoid becoming a glutten. (Is there any irony between this statement and the last paragraph?) Anyway, the cookbook has been fairly reliable with some outstanding recipes. So, in all likelyhood, it is going to be a disasterously successful and fattening experience.

I think he ought to stay in Japan and get fat there and not bring his bad habits back here!

Runner - Wednesday Mar 23, 2005

Weight: 113.0

Still at 113. Two days in a row means it's probably not a fluctuation.

I had a good day food-wise yesterday. I planned my meals and pretty much stuck to my goals.

Sometimes I get so tired of planning, discipline, and all the stuff that goes along with maintaining my weight. I feel like I eat egg-white omelets at least every other night for dinner, as I've usually eaten too many calories during the day to allow myself any more. My typical dinner is a 100-calorie omelet (2 egg whites and some low-fat cheese) and a big plate of steamed veggies with soy sauce on them. At least I like omelets and veggies! It's a good thing I don't mind eating the same thing over and over again. In fact, I could probably live on cereal and egg-white omelets for weeks.

Ah, well. I still feel bloated, but I'm hoping my period is on its way. I took progesterone pills for a week in order to jump start my period. Maybe that's why my weight is up.

Jennifer68 on 03/24/2005:
I'm still waiting for my period too! Ugh! Water weight is a huge factor for me. You are doing great, just give it some time. :)

Runner - Tuesday Mar 22, 2005

Weight: 113.0

Up a pound and a half. Is it water weight? A mere fluctuation? Or have the extra calories I've consumed all added up?

I had about 600 calories too many yesterday. I won't go into all the details, but baking without my husband around is just NOT a good idea. Instead of making something I wouldn't be tempted to eat, I made something I enjoy eating very much!!!

So let's just say that today is a NEW day...even though I feel more bloated than normal, I'm going to stay positive and make SMART choices today!!

Maria7 on 03/22/2005:
Hey, I've eaten four cinnamon rolls today!

Runner - Monday Mar 21, 2005

Weight: 111.5

Except for an unplanned chocolate covered cherry and piece of candy, dinner went very smoothly last night! I made the tacos but stuck to refried beans and lowfat cheese myself. Good thing, as my husband and our company ate almost all the ground beef themselves! If I would have had some, we would definitely have run out of it!

The low-carb, sugar-free key lime pie was amazing! I am so impressed with those Sans Sucre mixes. I spread a little whipped topping on it and it was very light and fluffy...and I didn't feel at all guilty while enjoying a big piece!

I have to do some baking tonight and my hubby will be playing b-ball, so I'll need an extra dose of discipline in the kitchen.

As for exercise, the weather here is getting hotter and hotter and running oustide is already quite uncomfortable! What am I going to do during the summer months? Wake up at 4am???? Yeah, right! But it's already over 80 degrees when I walk to work in the mornings...and pretty soon, I'll probably have to give up and ride on the scooter with my husband.

biscottibody59 on 03/22/2005:
It's about to go from winter to summer here (in TX) anytime soon--but I don't think we're as humid as you are there!

I thought I'd try to get your thoughts on shoes (running) once again--I was very happy with my Brooks Glycerin 2s--went through 3 pairs. Changed to Asics Nimbus 6--they're about 3 mos old and I only jog an average of 10-15 miles per week. Well, they're shot and I don't know if I'll be able to find the Brooks I like--I have a neutral gait, so cushioned is my shoe of choice--any thoughts or opinions you have with your experience would be welcome. By email or comments--thanks a bunch!

Have a good one!

borntocry on 03/22/2005:
Hi Runner,

I know what you mean about the weather. I never thought I'd say this, because up until now I have always detested the cold, but I am actually dreading the onset of summer. It's hard to believe just how much I have changed since I started running. I would never have thought that anything could make me prefer wintry weather, but it's happened. I am still much more sensitive to cold than to heat, but running in the cold is such a nice way to warm up! I am not looking forward to getting all hot and sweaty in the summer. I guess now I can appreciate the fact that I live in a place where it is cold and rainy well into July.

Thanks for your comment, by the way! It's good to know that you understand how I feel about my cousin's eating habits. I hate it when girls pretend that they want to eat, knowing full well that they're not going to. Why don't they just make it easier on everyone and say that they aren't hungry? I always remember how one time back home one of my neighbours came over to visit. My mother brought in some tea and snacks. We happened to have some cream puffs in the house which my brother and I loved. So I offered her one of those. She said, "Oh I'd love to, thanks!" She put one on her plate, and never touched it! If she had taken just one bite, I would have assumed that she just didn't like it. But she didn't even taste it!

Runner - Sunday Mar 20, 2005

Weight: 111.5

Somehow I'm hanging on to 111.5, although I briefly saw 112.5 today, so I know that I need to be careful!

I did okay calorie-wise this weekend, but I ate some unhealthy foods and felt more guilty after consuming them, even though I pretty much "substituted" them for other calories. I still don't believe that all calories are created equally. If I eat 1800 calories of junk compared to 1800 calories of healthy food, I almost always see the number go up on the scale. I don't know why that it, except that it seems like most of the junk food is full of carbs, which go straight to my hips!

Anyway, I realized that after 6 years of eating healthy and maintaining my weight, I've almost completely lost my taste for certain foods...like pizza, bread, pasta, potato chips, and other starchy things. I still eat carbs in moderation, but I prefer whole-grain cereals, veggies, sweet potatoes and fruits.

But I still love those brownies and cookies...so if I can ever lose my taste for sweets, then I'll really consider that an accomplishment!

I'm having company over for dinner tonight...making tacos. But I've learned how to cut corners so that I don't consume a large amount of calories. For example, I'll skip the tortillas and taco shells, as I don't like them anyway, and I'll stick to the refried beans, lettuce, tomatoes, etc. I don't like Doritos, so those won't tempt me. I also made a 2-layer sugar-free jello, so that's low-cal. (no one will know!)

And dessert is a low-carb, sugar-free Key Lime pie. (Again, no one will know!! I'll spread some whipped cream on top and it will look like the real thing!)

tabbylove74 on 03/21/2005:
Hi ...thanks for taking the time to message me i appreciate it. Your diary is inspiring and i can identify with a lot of what you wrote. I'm not feeling deprived of anything as of yet but i'm expecting to feel like that shortly and i'm wondering how to handle it without "licking the icing off doughnuts" ha ha :o) Keep up the good work..i hope i reach the weight you're at one day...and more importantly, be able to maintain that weight! Respect,...Paula x

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