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Runner - Friday Oct 15, 2004

Weight: 114.0

The candy corns are not at my desk anymore, but they're still in the office to be enjoyed by anyone. I am resisting. It's so hard...Becca, I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who can shovel those things in my mouth.

I was hoping for a loss today, but I have a 1/2 pound "gain."

Even though life isn't fair, I really don't deserve it. I had company for dinner last night and was sooo good. I made 4 pizzas, salad, jello, Oreo pudding, and served Doritos. Everyone else pigged out. I stuck to salad (with fat free dressing), 2 small pieces of pizza, and my own sugar-free chocolate pudding with no Oreos. I skipped the jello, Doritos, and the chance to eat a bunch of fattening cheese.

But my weight was up. Man! I just can't win sometimes.

I get so frustrated when I watch skinny people shoveling Doritos into their mouths. The Chinese family of 5 that I had for dinner ate an entire bag of them. An entire bag! And they're all thin.

I may be thin, but I work my tail off to stay thin! I've been working out twice a day every day for weeks...yes, I do eat about 1700-1800 calories every day, but I think I deserve that, and frankly, I'm not going to walk around hungry.

Anyway, my race is this weekend, so the next 48 hours are important...I need to feed my body the right kinds of foods. I'm off to a good start today.

borntocry on 10/15/2004:

You can't look at what other people eat and compare yourself to them. It's possible that your metabolism could be worse than theirs (I think dieting does have that effect sometimes) but the truth is that everyone has different eating patterns and different indulgences. For instance, when my mother and I go to a restaurant, she orders a plate of steamed fish with some steamed vegetables on the side and eats about half of it. I order a large dish of creamy pasta with deep-fried spinach and parmesan balls and finish it all. But what you don't see is that I had no breakfast that morning while she had a large mug of warm milk with sugar and a dollop of double cream on top, as well as maybe an omelette and toast. Your Chinese friends may be gobbling down the Doritos but they probably don't have candy corn or cheesecake very often! On the other hand, maybe dinner at your house is just a really special occasion for them to pig out on your American treats and delectable cooking!

Becca27 on 10/15/2004:
Thanks so much for your encouraging words. I did fess up to my hubby. We have an amazing relationship - we've been together for almost 20years. He knows me well. I was so hard on myself about it that he ended up consoling me. He would do anything to help and always has. I've said, over and over, that he, and all husbands, are in a tough spot. We want their support to be uncondiitional but we want them to hold us accountable, too. That's a hard line to walk - kind of, damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Regarding prayer, it is something I do every day. It's hard to imagine, though, that God cares about my personal psychoses when there are so many real problems in the world. I think about how blessed my life is and how selfish it is for me to be consumed about "physical perfection". When my daughter looks in the mirror and cries about her teeth being crooked, I want her to stop, appreciate her beauty, and be thankful that she's healthy and complete. We know a child who is dying from Leukemia and others who are mentally retarded. Why can't we see our own beauty and perfection and get on our hands and knees and thank God? Instead, we always look at what we don't have. I'm just like my kids. I will begin to pray, though, for peace. I will pray that I can be happy with who I am and how God made me. I want to be unburdened by discontentment and the obsesssions that consume me. Isn't that what we all want?

I'm glad that you're eating healthy. I do appreciate how hard you work to stay thin - people think that if your thin, it must come easy. I know that it doesn't. I hope that your race goes well and you meet your goals. You seem to have a healthy attitude. Have a wonderful day!

geevee on 10/15/2004:
I find myself packing away 1400-1600cal. a day, but I figured if I'm really burning 350cal. an hour swimming 7 days, and 350cal. in a yoga class 5 days, I can afford it. Occasionally I might go up to 1700. There's always a trade off for what I eat or drink. You just can't have everything.

Hey, did you read the Chinese obesity article I posted on Wed?

subway girl on 10/15/2004:
Thanks for your comment. I am glad that I became food/nutrition conscious when I did so that I can prevent myself from gaining the freshman 15! That would be horrible.

I am aiming for right around 1000 calories a day. The reason why I am aiming low is because I don't get much, if any, exercise in during the day. Except walking to and from class and up and down the stairs. Every once in a while I manage to slip in a 30 minute aerobic/toning video. 1000 calories is really no big deal for me, I don't think I have a very big stomach, so smaller amounts of food fill me up, it is just eating the higher calorie foods (dessert) that cause me to gain the weight. Honestly, I think if I didn't have such a huge sweet tooth I wouldn't have a problem losing 3 more pounds and then maintainng that weight. But who knows, maybe not?

All I know is that I can't give up my sweets after dinner so I have to keep eating the lower calorie/fat/sugar desserts and allow myself a treat every once in a while. I never realized how much self control eating required until I started trying to lose weight. Who knew that something as simple as giving your body energy to function could become so mentally and physically difficult?

geevee on 10/15/2004:
Hi Runner - I asked my son who loves donuts what he thought about Mr. Donut and this was his reply:

Mr. Dounut is a Japanese company and all of it`s product is like every other Japanese cake-- all decoration and no substance. It looks exactly like the American thing it immitates, but they don`t bother with butter, eggs or sugar.

Maybe it'll be popular with the Chinese who "don't like sweets either."

Runner - Thursday Oct 14, 2004

Weight: 113.5

The Chinese went crazy over the "dirt pudding." They kept staring at it...wondering if it was ice cream. They couldn't believe that the worms were edible. They ate it up so quickly that I was lucky to lick the spoon at the end. I also made a cake in the shape of a pumpkin (two bundt cakes stuck together with frosting), and I tried saving the "ends" of the cake (you know, the parts stuck on the plate after the whole thing has been cut) and when I wasn't looking, a skinny Chinese lady wandered over to the plate and started eating my ends! I said, "Hey, those are mine!" in a friendly, yet convincing tone. She left the rest of my ends alone and I got to try about 3 bites of the cake. That was enough for me. It was good and sweet!

So I made it through the party fine...until a co-worker gave me a tub of candy corns shipped to her from the U.S. (thanks to her grandma). For some strange reason, I crave those things around Halloween time...and I usually overeat them at least once, meaning that I feel phyiscally sick from all the sugar. I didn't eat enough to feel sick yesterday, but I still consumed a good 200 calories of pure sugar.

And I did the same this afternoon after lunch. Ugh. I mean, the first two ingredients of candy corns are "sugar" and "corn syrup." I'd never just eat a spoonful of sugar, but that's essentially what I'm doing with those things. Why do I like them? That is the great mystery.

I need to give the rest of them away before my weight goes up again.

Becca27 on 10/14/2004:
Candy corn marked the beginning of a horrible day for me yesterday. Get rid of them!!!

geevee on 10/14/2004:
How clever of you to make a pumpkin shaped cake! Great idea! You had me laughing out loud when you told about the skinny Chinese woman eating your ends. You're doing these people a great public service.

Runner - Tuesday Oct 12, 2004

Weight: 114.0

Well, my joy over maintaining 113 disappeared this morning...Geevee, I was also up a pound and a half. I indulged in some fattening chocolate and other odds and ends yesterday, so probably my "small" indulgences have started to add up. They always do catch up with me...but I feel bloated, too, so maybe I'm retaining water for some reason.

I made a very large Oreo pudding dessert for a party today. I'm hoping it all disappears by the time I get around to "tasting" some. It will be interesting to see how the Chinese react to the dessert. It's actually that "dirt pudding" thing...and it really does look like dirt with the chocolate pudding, crushed Oreos and gummy worms in a large flower pot! The gummy worms are from the U.S., so they'll probably be very curious as to what they are.

Anyway, I want to stick to healthy eating and less snacking today. That's my goal. No more 1 1/2 pound "fluctuations" if I can help it!

Becca27 on 10/13/2004:
When my 9 yr old was in K, I made a big "flower pot" of dirt and worms for her birthday treat that she got to bring to school and share with the kids. Ever since then, I have to make it every year for her. It is, actually, extremely delicious and a nice change from cupcakes. Have a great party!

geevee on 10/13/2004:
What a presentation! That's on the order of something a master chef would do. Gummy worms! Eeek! How clever, and in a flower pot yet!

Here is a brief description of "your brother Jim's" latest concoction. The ingredients are definitely to my liking.

I innovated a new pound cake recipe. It`s called Jim`s Famous Espresso, almond, Bailey`s Cream Pound cake. The name pretty well explains it. All the Chinese teachers loved it. One of them expressed quite a bit of exasperation when the cake ran out and she observed that she had only received a very small piece.

Sounds familiar, doesn't it? And the Japanese keep reminding him that they don't like sweets!

Runner - Monday Oct 11, 2004

Weight: 113.0

Well, I'm back at 113, but the good news is that my weight has only fluctuated a 1/2 pound in 4 days. That's unusual...usually it's at least up and down a pound or a pound and a half. I like consistency. I like maintaining. I am fine with 113, as long as I'm not 114 one day and 112 the next day. That drives me nuts!

Anyway...I've been able to eat well lately and still indulge in a small piece of cheesecake the last two nights. There is a bakery here that makes real cheesecake (as good as you can find in Asia), and one of my Chinese friends brought me an entire cheesecake when I invited him over for dinner. I have managed to eat small pieces the last two nights, but I was afraid of losing control with the rest of it last night, so I put the last two pieces in the freezer. Hopefully, it will be out of sight, out of mind.

I keep saying to myself, "Eat to live, don't live to eat." I've made progress, but I still feel like I have a long ways to go sometimes...

On another note, my 21 km race is this Sunday. So I'm praying that my body stays strong and that I can get enough rest this week. I'm quite competitive, and I love passing these Chinese men who think that they're good runners. Ha! They always look amazed when a blond female is running faster than they are :) (okay, I'll stop now...pride goes before a fall, right?)

borntocry on 10/12/2004:
Wow! It's so cool that you can run faster than all those guys! I'm so excited about your race. I'll be thinking about you this weekend and hoping you do really well!

I'm really impressed at your self-control over the cheesecake. You allowed yourself a small piece and didn't make yourself feel guilty about it. And you didn't go overboard. That's the kind of normal approach to food which I am hoping to develop in myself as well.

Well, good luck with the race! I'm so jealous of you! I wish I could run that much! I wouldn't mind even if I was coming in last!

geevee on 10/12/2004:
As you know you're not alone. Here I had 125 going for a couple of days and then WHAM! up a pound and a half for no apparent reason. I was surprised I didn't retain as much water as I thought I would and I would have been back to almost 125 if not for that deadly but delicious lunch at the Biltmore I've been thinking about that I finally had. To indicate just how much I love Key Lime pie and cheesecake, even though I was full, I ate every bit of the pit! I really have to behave myself and only have a little fruit tonight.

Good luck on your marathon this week end. Too bad BTC can't be there with you. Running together would be fun.

Runner - Saturday Oct 09, 2004

Weight: 112.5

It's the weekend again, so my weight is temporarily down a pound. I'm so predictable! It will be up again tomorrow, I'm sure.

Last night I enjoyed a real cinnamon roll for the first time in over a year. They don't make cinnamon rolls very well here in Asia! They taste more like cardboard and lard!

But this one was made by a foreigner, and it was so, so good that I didn't care about the calories. I hadn't had time to eat dinner yet, anyway, so I basically made that my dinner. Bad, bad, bad. I never usually eat like that, but I couldn't resist.

And I enjoyed every bite!

Today may be a bit of a challenge, food-wise. I have a church potluck, which I can usually do okay at, but you never know. Thankfully, I am in charge of making the big dessert, so I made something that I won't want to eat. (carrot cake again)

And tonight I'm having company, so I'll have to cook some more.

Everything always seems to revolve around food...church, work, parties, family. Food, food, food. It's amazing.

Well, I hope to catch up and comment on some more entries later today!

subway girl on 10/10/2004:
Thank you so much for all the advice and support! It really does mean a lot to me to know that I have people I can count on. I weigh myself naked, in the morning, and before I eat or drink anything for the day. The only beverage I drink is water, but it couldn't hurt to drink more! I am really going to try to work on adding more protein and less carbs, but carbs are so good! It will be tough but I think I can do it! Also, I'm working on eating less desserts! I read something in a magazine about cravings and found it helpful and informative. Once again, thanks for everything! And good luck to you on reaching your goal of 110. I know you can do it, you seem to be on a roll. Keep up the hard work.

geevee on 10/10/2004:
Runner, I think I should informally adopt you. I love reading your entries because it's just like reading a letter from my son in Japan. It's incredible how similar the both of you are, as if you had grown up together! OH, and how he LOVES carrot cake!

It's a darn good thing you're not in Japan, not only for the availability of excellent chocolate, but a wicked delight called "Chou Creams". These are cream puffs that come straight off the assembly line in the thousands and thousands of franchises all over Japan. My son is completely addicted to them and insists on having two a day. I couldn't even imagine how many hundreds of calories are in just one! And now several of these places are opening in NYC which means that not "if" but "when" they start opening others, we will have one more fattening goodie to eat.

borntocry on 10/11/2004:
Hi Runner,

Loved your story about challenging guys to pizza eating contests. I used to do the same thing. In fact there was a burger joint at my university where people tried to set records for how many burgers they could eat at one sitting. I think the record was 25 or 26. Every time I walked past it I thought, "Man, I bet I could break that record!" Thank goodness I never actually tried!!

I think you did the right thing by having that cinnamon roll for dinner! I know it sounds really unhealthy, but I've learnt the hard way that sometimes one has to choose between one's diet and one's health. You could have forced yourself to eat dinner but why have all those extra calories? You could have passed up the cinnamon roll but then you might have over-eaten at dinner in an attempt to compensate... and if that didn't work you might have ended up having something sweet for dessert anyway! At least, that is what often happens with me. Now, if I find myself craving something sweet I just let myself have it and try to balance it out by cutting down on something else. As long as it only happens once in a while, I don't see the harm in it.

Runner - Thursday Oct 07, 2004

Weight: 113.5

Today was a really busy day at work, so I barely had time to think about food. Of course, I still ate all my meals, but snacking wasn't really an option. So I ate more for dinner than normal, but I was hungry. Oh, well. Life goes on!

Tomorrow I am flying down to the new city where I will be living in a month or so. My husband and I will be taken out to both lunch and dinner by Chinese people, so who knows what we'll get? Usually they over-do it with a 12-course meal or something ridiculous like that. I'll just pack a protein bar and some soy nuts just in case! I've learned how to slide food over to my husband's plate rather subtly when I just can't stand to eat any more oily veggies.

Oh---and I'm proud to say that I skipped the Diet Coke today! :) I may need one tomorrow, as we're leaving fairly early, and for some reason, I enjoy a bit of sweet caffeine in the morning. But we'll see.

Becca27 on 10/07/2004:
I have a stupid question; Are you living in China? I know you teach, but it's just dawning on me now that you might be living over there. Good job on the diet coke. That stuff is nasty.

geevee on 10/07/2004:
The nice part of those many course meals is that you can eat as much or little of each dish that you want, far better than being given a loaded down plate like in the US, the kind I was presented when I went to the restaurant I wrote about where I had overeaten.

The cheapo super market I went to today didn't have the tortillas you described but I was suckered into buying the small, 6" ones made from whole corn - 60cal. apiece which will be good w/half an ounce of cheese, red peppers and mushrooms. I'll look for the others tomorrow when I go to my favorite store.

Your mention of "sweet caffeine" in the morning reminds me that a large percentage of the American public starts the day with a Coke and NOT coffee. I know I did in junior high along with a jelly donut. Arghhh! It sounds awful!

borntocry on 10/08/2004:
Hi Runner,

It's interesting that you can get cr�pes from street vendors in Taiwan, even if they aren't very good. Are they French-style cr�pes or a more Taiwanese variant?

Thanks for your advice on weights. As soon as I can get myself organised a bit, I will buy some dumb-bells and make a list of exercises I can do at home. Ages ago, when I was first thinking about it, I bookmarked several websites which should help me come up with a good list of exercises.

Also, thanks for constantly encouraging me to weigh myself. I'm tempted to weigh myself this weekend instead of waiting for the 23rd... but I will surely see a bigger loss if I wait until then, and that will be more inspiring for me. So I think I'll try to wait!

Runner - Tuesday Oct 05, 2004

Weight: 113.5

Yesterday was a pretty good day. My company (all Chinese) loved my "American-style" food, and they just couldn't believe that my chicken-tortilla casserole had NO vegetable oil in it. I proudly showed them my PAM cooking spray and explained that I just use a little bit of it to coat the pan so I can fry the chicken breast.

They learned two things:

1. large amounts of oil are NOT necessary to enhance the taste of food; that can be done with the proper seasonings and marinades

2. not all American food is "unhealthy." IN fact, chicken breast is far healthier than chicken thighs or legs, which is what they like to eat!

I also made them a strawberry-banana sugar-free jello and stirred in a carton of banana yogurt, and they loved that, too. It's so low-calorie, but no one could tell.

And, of course, there was the carrot cake, which they gobbled up. (And which I avoided). Unfortunately, I did use a large amount of vegetable oil for that one!

Anyway...I wasn't perfect in my eating, but my weight has only continued to fluctuate about a half pound, so I'm not stressing out about it.

I have another habit that I need to kick, though. Growing up, my mom rarely bought soda (pop) for us kids to drink, so I rarely drank it until my 20's. Then, when I realized that diet pop had no calories and still tasted sweet, I started drinking one can about every other day. Unfortunately, I have continued that habit. The only diet soda available here is Diet Coke, which wouldn't normally be my first choice, but I like the sweetness. (And the zero calories!)

However, I'm sure that drinking 4 or 5 cans of Diet Coke each week does nothing good for my body in the long run...I've read some things about soda and none of it is positive. It's not like I'm drinking several cans a day...maybe one, if that. And it often takes away my sugar cravings. (temporarily) But I still feel "addicted," and I don't want to be addicted to any kind of food! (or drink)

Do any of you dieters drink a lot of diet pop? Does it help you avoid eating sweets? Do you recommend giving it up totally, or do you think it's okay to enjoy on a regular basis?

borntocry on 10/06/2004:
Hi Runner,

I also grew up in a household where soda was strictly for special occasions. I hardly ever drank it until I went to university. Then I met my husband - a soda fiend. He drinks two litres a day. I began to have soda every day at lunch and sometimes at dinner. I could no longer bear the taste (or rather, tastelessness) of water. But one day I just decided to stop drinking soda. It was hard at first but I got used to drinking water again. Now I never crave soda.

I don't drink diet soda because I don't like the taste, and because I try to avoid artificial additives (which is hard to do when you buy diet foods). But as far as I know, there is no hard evidence that artifical sweeteners are actually bad for you. I'm sure the Diet Coke is doing nothing good for your body but I doubt it is doing you any harm, especially in the extremely limited amounts you seem to be consuming.

subway girl on 10/06/2004:
I think it is very interesting that you live in Asia, and I love to hear all your stories about the Chinese, their food, and their views on Americans! It's quite entertaining!

Now, to answer your question on if I get hungry during the day. My answer? Not usually. Normally I am too busy w/ my classes and homework to think about if I am hungry or not. I am on such a schedule that the only time I really think about eating is breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And of course my sweets after dinner. That's the only time I really have trouble controlling what/how much I eat, because I have a sweet tooth the size of the US!

I was interested in your questions on diet soda. I myself quit drinking soda about 2 years ago because of how bad it is for you, and then just recently (this summer) discovered diet soda! At first I drank it every day, but eventually I just kept drinking less and less until now, and now I rarely have diet soda. I guess it sort of lost its appeal. I find water satisfies my thurst best, and milk satisfies my need for beverages w/ flavor best. The sweetness of soda was never enough to curb my cravings! But hey, I say that if drinking a 0 calorie, 0 sugar, 0 carb beverage helps you from over-indulging on a high calorie, high sugar, high carb dessert, stick w/ the soda!

geevee on 10/06/2004:
To me, nothing is sweeter than fresh fruit. I savor every mouthful while satisfying my desire for something sweet. I consider soda pop a modern plague, the artificially sweetened variety just as bad as the real sugar kind. I used to drink several cans a day and somehow stopped that habit. A friend of mine who is a doctor said that she retains water when she drinks the artificially sweetened kind. Whenever I taste it, I swear all I taste is chemicals. Long ago I started buy 100% fruit juice, not the Hawaiin Punch variety that has say, 10-15% juice with the rest sugar water. I find a 4oz. glass of natural juice a real treat that I enjoy. It satisfies my craving for something sweet. Natural juice is far better than any soda.

Runner - Monday Oct 04, 2004

Weight: 113.0

I managed to not freak out at the scale this morning. It was only a half pound fluctuation, so I didn't go crazy. Everyone who left comments made good points...things I will consider more seriously. I really should only weigh myself once a week. I'm just afraid that I will happen to weigh myself on a day when my weight is UP two pounds and then freak out...at least if I weigh myself every day, I can see the normal fluctuation, which usually helps me stay "on track" each day.

I'm having company over for lunch, but I made some food that I can enjoy, too. Dessert is a fattening carrot cake, but I won't have any. I made myself a small carrot cake using applesauce and fat-free cream cheese that I brought all the way back from the States! So if I'm really feeling deprived, I can have some of that.

I have more baking to do tonight, though. Some of my co-workers have "ordered" desserts from me, and since they don't have ovens, I offered to bake them what they want. I really should open my own bakery. Of course, that would also mean disaster for my figure, I'm sure.

borntocry on 10/05/2004:
Yeah! Open your own bakery! That would be so cool! And I bet eventually you'd be so fed up of baked goods that the mere thought of them would sicken and disgust you!

I know what you mean about being afraid that you might weigh yourself on a day when your weight is up two pounds. I guess however often you weigh yourself, you just have to accept that some degree of imprecision is inevitable. I wonder if you could chart your weight fluctuations and maybe figure out if there's some method to the madness?

Thanks for your comments, by the way. I'm planning to be in America for a little over two weeks. I am going to try to get a lot of exercise, as you suggested. The last few times I went to America I played a lot of tennis, but it might be too cold for that in November. So I'm going to try to do a lot of running. Is there anything else I could do or do you think that's enough?

geevee on 10/05/2004:
If I don't weigh myself, I automatically slack off and end up eating more than I should. It's like a "free pass" for the day, and you know there are those days when you just know your weight will be up and you don't want to weigh but you have to or it gets worse. There is no way I could only weigh once a week. In my former "fat days" I avoided the scale for months on end and look what happened! 165lbs!

My son is building up a "clientele" at his office too for baked goods. So many don't have ovens in Japan too. They beg him to bake for them. He's going to have to regale us at Christmas with his concoctions, and I will have to try them after all the work he's gone to.

Runner - Monday Oct 04, 2004

Weight: 113.5

I have had 3 full days of doing almost everything right. In fact, yesterday was about as perfect of a "food/ exercise" day I could have asked for! I started my morning with a 75-minute run, ate a healthy breakfast, skipped the church potluck food for my own healthy lunch, took a 75-minute hike with a friend in the afternoon, had a healthy dinner, and enjoyed a snack before bed.

After 3 hours of exercise and the right kind of food, I was hoping I would see that I at least maintained my "Saturday" weight. Nope. I was up a pound. For some reason, this really ticked me off this morning. Unfortunately, I got upset at my innocent husband, who has only been supportive through everything.

As he was eating his breakfast, which is double the calories of mine, I just got so upset...I was demanding that he agree with me that the number on the scale is complete craziness! In my mind, eating the right amount of calories, not bingeing and working out for 3 hours should do SOMETHING to the number on the scale! What would happen if I DIDN'T work out and I DIDN'T care about what I ate? I'd gain more than one pound, that's for sure!

Anyway, my husband just pointed out that my weight always fluctuates one or two pounds...and he's right...but I was mad, anyway. I just wanted someone to agree with me. But he thinks I'm too skinny, anyway. He would like me to gain a few pounds.

I apologized to him later and things are okay now. I really shouldn't have taken my frustration out on him. But this process of maintaining my weight is so hard. When I get down to 112.5, I want to KEEP the scale there. But it always just bounces back up to 113.5 or 114, even if I do everything right!

To end on a positive note, at least my weekend eating was controlled and healthy. I didn't "lose it" like I did a few times last week.

borntocry on 10/04/2004:
Hi Runner,

I don't think you will ever be able to keep your weight constant. There will always be small daily fluctuations. My guess would be that your body takes a couple of days to process what you eat. So maybe you weigh 112 lb. when your digestive tract is completely empty but 114 lb. when it isn't. If you want to make sure that the scale never goes higher than 112 lb, you will probably have to lose one or two pounds. But then your weight would probably fluctuate between 110 lb. and 112 lb. and you'd get upset thinking that you'd "gained" two pounds... you have to decide what range you want your weight to be in and then accept that there will always be small fluctuations within that range.

Becca27 on 10/04/2004:
Doesnt' it always go back down, too. It is impossible to maintain exactly the same weight everyday. Especially as an athlete - you develop muscles running and hiking. Would it really be too hard for you to weigh yourself 1 x a week? Look how great you've done over the past few days - you felt great and healthy and strong - you made smart choices, and then let the scale destroy all of it. If you made a commitment to only weigh yourself on Sat. - I think you would see a greater consistency and it would allow you to feel good about the day to day efforts you make, regardless of the #'s. Your clothes are a truer measure of weight than the scale. I understand your frustration - it's a battle I wage myself. But I can't let it destroy my progress or hurt my self image - I can have a fabulous week and feel better - knowing I'm healthy - and I'll carry myself higher - smile more - take more risks - if I step on that scale and it doesn't reflect how I feel, it destroys everything and takes up too much time in my mind. Hang in there. I'm sorry that you struggle with this. It isn't fun.

skinnyjill on 10/04/2004:
If you're working out so much, it may be that you're gaining muscle mass. Muscle weighs more than fat.

When I was playing rugby I lost a bunch of weight then gained a bunch back. This wasn't because I was eating more or exercising less. I was doing the opposite. I had reacheda certain point where I had lost a bunch of fat and then started to build muscle. I hadn't outgrown my fat.

When I stopped playing I lost weight, which I tought was weird. I thought I would gain weight. I was losing muscle mass and it was turning to fat.

The body is amazing.

Don't be discouraged. NOw that you're gaining muscle you're burn more fat. GREAT JOB. Just keep measuring your waist and hips. That's a good way to tell if you're gaining muscle. If you are, you'll become lean.

Best of luck in your weightloss goals

subway girl on 10/04/2004:
Thanks for your comment! The slimfast bars are only 130 calories. I figure since they are a controlled portion size and less calories than many other yummy desserts, they are a good thing to keep around.

Even if the scale doesn't show a loss, or even a maintaining weight, at least you will feel good about yourself for eating right and exercising. Your body thanks you! Good luck with the numbers tomorrow, and don't let it discourage you!

geevee on 10/04/2004:
I'm lugging around an extra pound myself. I have no idea where it came from either. If you didn't eat right and/or exercise, you might have TWO extra pounds!

Runner - Saturday Oct 02, 2004

Weight: 112.5

I'm happy to report that yesterday was a good day! Whew! Even though my weight was 114 yesterday morning, it was down to 112.5 today. Gotta love those Saturdays! They're always good to me! But more important than the number on the scale is the fact that I ate good, healthy foods, allowing myself a small treat but not overdoing it.

Today has been fine, too, but I have a BBQ to attend tonight. I am in charge of the desserts, so I made a fattening dessert that I knew I wouldn't want to eat and a low-fat dessert that I hope turns out okay! If not, then oh, well. I don't need any leftovers!

Anyway, I usually do okay at BBQ's...as long as they have some lean protein! I'm not a fan of potato chips or salty snacky foods, so I can always pass those things up.

Thank you all for your encouraging comments. I honestly feel like you all are in the food battle with me...and that's comforting! It's nice to have some people on my side! :)

Becca27 on 10/02/2004:
I think you should eat before you go to the BBQ - so you're not too hungry when you're there. Bring something healthy, too, so if there aren't any good choices there, at least you've brought one. Be careful! Parties are the worst! I hate watching everyone else pile up their plates without a care in the world (kind of like I did lastnight)- If all else fails - exercise portion control and chew slowly. LOL good luck! Great job with the weight. Weekends are good to you! - Even with all the eating out you did last week.

geevee on 10/02/2004:
We sure are in this battle with you! You're just a bit ahead of us by having reached your goal. The good part of that for us, is, that we see how the battle doesn't end when we reach our goal, but continues! Your experience has made it so clear how important it is to not let up, not backtrack; be ETERNALLY VIGILANT!

Becca27 on 10/02/2004:
Hey Runner,

I found this article about dining out and I thought of you. (I wonder why?) http://www.fitlinxx.com/Article.htm?ID=376

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