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Runner - Tuesday May 25, 2004

Weight: 116.0

Woah. Last night was one of those nights that everything went wrong, food-wise.

I was asked to make some treats (caramel bars) for a baby shower tonight. I had made them last week, and the lady liked them so much, she requested that I make them again. Well, I love getting compliments on my baking, so I readily agreed! I decided to make two batches.

Unfortunately, my convection oven (I don't have a real oven here...bummer!) wasn't working right, so the first batch of the caramel bars turned out too hard. I cooked my second batch in someone else's oven, and they didn't turn out right, either! Meanwhile, I'm trying small samples to see what I can do to make them edible...I mean, they weren't bad, they just weren't GREAT. And they definitely didn't taste like they did last week when my friend tried them!!

So I attempted another dessert---and these were even more unhealthy. Of course, I had to "lick the bowl" when I was finished! I don't know if those turned out or not---I haven't tried one yet. And I don't plan to. THey're full of chocolate, peanut butter, and butter. BUT, I did my share of sampling all the other goodies, and I went to bed feeling wired and edgy.

In fact, I couldn't sleep for at least an hour and a half. My whole night was wasted making food that didn't turn out right, and I consumed who knows how many calories in frustration. What a waste of my time!!!

For some reason, I woke up ready to go at 5:30am, even though I didn't sleep much, and decided to go running and then swimming. So I got an hour workout in this morning. That's my only consolation.

You know, I love to bake, but I hate it when I goof up. It causes me to overeat, get frustrated, and waste my time.

borntocry on 05/26/2004:
You poor thing! I know exactly how you feel. I get a lot of compliments on my cooking too, and I'm so anxious to protect my reputation that if ever something doesn't turn out right, I often eat it all myself so that no-one has to know! It's dreadful! Now I've started making things in really small batches to limit the damage.

It doesn't sound like you ate that much, actually, and I'm sure the hour you spent running and swimming at the crack of dawn probably burnt it all off. I always think that if over-eating inspires you to get a good workout then it's worth it. And I've read that exercising first thing in the morning is really effective, not that I have much first-hand experience to confirm that!

That second dessert you made sounds great, by the way - I think I'd prefer it to the caramel bars! So maybe it all turned out for the best?

Runner - Monday May 24, 2004

Weight: 116.0

The Food Fair was so easy! Except for a tiny sample of cheese, I didn't see anything that I wanted, so I ate my protein bar, fruit, and some soy nuts for lunch instead! Actually, it was a really good weekend, food-wise. And I gave away all the sweets in my freezer today. So whether or not the scale goes up or down, I've made smart choices the last couple of days. And that's a good feeling!

borntocry on 05/24/2004:
Good for you! We're proud of you, girl!

Runner - Saturday May 22, 2004

Weight: 116.5

My weight is still up, which isn't good, especially since I'm going to a Food Fair tomorrow! Ugh! My only hope is that all the food will be pricey and that there won't be many samples out. I dislike paying for fattening food, so I doubt I'll waste my money, but I am a sucker for free samples. I'll report in on Monday--- here's to a disciplined day!

Runner - Wednesday May 19, 2004

Weight: 116.5

Rats. I've officially gained a couple of pounds since last Thursday. So weird, since I had lost two pounds on my two-week vacation and put them back on when I got home. And I know that I haven't been eating any more than I did while on vacation! Even if I allowed myself some ice cream yesterday, I still tracked my calories and I thought I was in the "safe" zone.

Hmmmm....I also got plenty of exercise. I know that I must burn at least 500-600 cals a day doing exercise. (I run 5-6 miles every morning and also do some sort of workout after work every day) So why can't I enjoy a little extra foods once in awhile? Every time I seem to enjoy extra snacks, my weight goes up. Ugh!

It's not like I'm obsessed with weighing 115 pounds or something. It's that I can't seem to figure out how many calories I actually need. Maybe it's more like 1500. I just want to maintain my weight, that's all! I get tired of the ups and downs.

But I goofed up today already. I had three small pieces of a candybar-like dessert that I made at lunchtime. Yeah, I was going to give it away, but I ended up eating some of it! I always have good intentions, you know? But then my selfish inner self thinks that I deserve to sample a good portion of whatever I bake.

Okay...there is still a lot of "day" left today. I WILL do better. And tomorrow is a new day!

Runner - Wednesday May 19, 2004

Weight: 115.0

I made it through the day with no candy! Wahoo! The only sweets I had was a tiny bowl of peanut butter ice cream before bed. I think I earned it, considering I got almost 2 hours of exercise. Of course, my weight didn't change today, but oh, well.

Does anyone out there do tae-bo? I've been doing tae-bo videos with the Chinese staff here for a few months, and I'm getting a little bored with it. But they really enjoy doing it...so I'm just glad they want to exercise!

We have a birthday party today. Lots of ice cream...I'll go easy. My husband will be there to help me.

borntocry on 05/19/2004:
Good for you! I am so jealous of your infinite capacity for exercise!

I was thinking that I could start running in the evening, before leaving work. There are less people around then and these days it gets dark so late here. How long do you think I should try to run for, given that I'm totally out of shape? And how many days a week should I aim to do it? I probably won't be able to manage every day. Just thought I'd ask you for advice as you're the Runner around here!

Hope the birthday party goes well. You're so lucky that your husband actually helps you, unlike my boyfriend who would probably be stuffing ice-cream down my throat!

geevee on 05/19/2004:
I know nothing at all about Tai Bo or if music is played while you do it, but when I was in Shanghai one of the gals in our group was really into Tai Chi and had a private teacher to learn it. She and a couple others then did the Tai Chi to American music and it was fascinating to watch how beautiful it was. Even better, every time we would have a social meeting and the Tai Chiers would perform, it seemed like every Chinese in the building came to watch. I don't know if doing such a thing would appropriate with Tai Bo, but it might be fun with the right kind of music and entertaining to the Chinese.

Runner - Tuesday May 18, 2004

Weight: 115.0

My weight was up a pound today, but I don't feel like recording it. Hopefully it's just those dumb fluctuations...like salt retention or something.

So far so good today. I've had abuot 600 calories so far...I'm trying to stay around 1600-1800 calories every day, and I want those calories to count. To be the kind of calories that my body needs---so I'm trying to stay away from sugar and just concentrate on the good stuff.

I have a race on Saturday, anyway, so it doesn't help me out any to just eat junk.

My goal is to make it through today without any empty sugar calories. Fruit, yes. Candy, no.

borntocry on 05/18/2004:
Don't let that pound get you down; it's probably nothing, like you said. Are you happy with your current weight, though? It looks pretty good to me!

Thanks for the comment you left me. I totally agree with you about the food in foreign countries. I lived in India for a while and I actually prefer the food in Indian restaurants in America to "the real thing". Everything there is cooked in gallons of oil until it turns into a greasy, spicy mush.

Good luck avoiding the sugar today! What kind of race are you running on Saturday? I so envy your level of fitness, and the way you keep it up no matter what part of the world you're in!

Runner - Monday May 17, 2004

Weight: 115.0

I ended up freezing the rest of the brownies last night, but that didn't stop me from de-thawing them today. After eating about three of them at lunchtime, I threw the rest away. Rats. I haven't had to do that in a long time. But I know myself---as long as they're in the house, I won't be able to eat them in moderation.

On a better note, we finally joined a really nice health club here, and I can start lifting weights on a regular basis again! I've missed doing that.

borntocry on 05/17/2004:
I hate throwing food away too, but I think that it has to be done sometimes. After all, one can only have so much self-control! Don't feel bad about it!

You asked me how long I've been in France. Well, I moved here after graduating from college about five years ago. I didn't know anyone here but I had taken a year of French at college and I wanted to work in Europe, so here I am!

superstarr on 05/17/2004:
Hi Runner!! I'm glad you threw the brownies away! I hate to waste food but sometimes it is all you can do. Well, besides just not buy it, but that is hard too!

I don't think I have seen you at 115 before. You always are talking about wanting to lose that one pound and that is when you are around 117. So are you feeling good about the 115? It seems to be sticking, the scale isn't going up!!

Runner - Sunday May 16, 2004

Weight: 115.0

I think that I eat better when I'm on vacation! It's just too tempting to snack when I'm home! Unfortunately, today wasn't a good day. I've been good for so long...and I just wanted to eat brownies today! I made some low-fat brownies "for my co-workers" and ended up eating at least 5 of them. ugh! Now I feel rotten. To make matters worse, I had some rich chocolate earlier in the day.

I know what CurlsnCuffs would say--- "Runner, quit eating sugar! You know that it gets you every time!"

She's right. It does get me every time. I start eating it and I can't quit.

I usually crave my veggies, fruits, and protein, but as soon as I allow myself some sweets in the privacy of my own kitchen, I'm a goner.

A year ago, I would have beaten myself up over this, but I've come a long way since then. I screw up less now than I ever have before, and I know that it doesn't help to get all upset and do something drastic like stop eating or go on a fast. I don't ever just stop eating. But I will move on and make better choices for the rest of today and hopefully in the days to follow.

geevee on 05/16/2004:
Yes! Swimming at the Biltmore is a FANTASTIC experience. You've been in 4 star hotels recently so you know what it's like. But this one is really special. It has such a classy, low key atmosphere. The way the cabanas are set up behind heavy foliage, it's the type of luxury hotel that would attract say, Madonna, or Mick Jaegger. I wrote all about it in today's entry.

I, too, crave fruits, esp. fresh pineapple, papaya, strawberries, mangoes and love them w/NFyogurt. I seldom crave chocolate, but if it's out there, I'll eat it! Ahh, but staying away from nightly wine can be a problem. There's always something, right?

breakaway on 05/16/2004:
Hey girl! I have missed your entries while I was gone. So glad to see you here today. Well, I have to say at least those brownies were low-fat ones! Your not doind so bad, seems like you have been maintaining your weight pretty well. Just never give up and keep striving for more! How is the running going? Have a great day today!

Runner - Saturday May 15, 2004

Weight: 115.0

The weather here is hot, hot, hot. I don't know how I'm going to keep running through the summer months. I think I'm going to start swimming more, although I tend to get bored while swimming laps. I prefer the noisy, chaotic streets that I run through...it's rarely boring here, even at 6:00am! Chinese people sure do get up early!

I was grocery shopping today at Costco, which is a huge wholesaler here. Anyway, they do sell a bunch of American-type food at a pricey cost, and the Chinese people just go nuts over it! They sure do consume more fatty and processed foods than ever before, and it's going to catch up with them. It already has with many of them...they're getting chunkier and chunkier. It's too bad, you know...it used to be really rare to see a fat Chinese person. Even now, I have yet to see an obese Chinese woman or man. BUT, many of them are now carrying around a few extra pounds.

Anyway...I'm just rambling.

So far so good on the eating plan today. I have to do some baking in the next couple of days, so I have to be careful.

And I still have ice cream in the freezer...temptations, temptations!

Umpqua on 05/15/2004:
Our weather is hot too (CT in the US) and I'm supposed to go hiking today. Guess I'll sweat through it! Interesting, I was just reading about how people in Asia and the Mediterrean are eating more and more processed foods and becoming overweight with other health problems. The convenience is just so tempting...Sounds like you're doing great with your diet. You're lucky you can keep stuff like ice cream in the freezer, no way I'd have any self control if I had that stuff in the house!

maryanng on 05/15/2004:
Your article was very inspiring..Thanks

geevee on 05/15/2004:
Of the millions of Chinese I saw in Beijing, Shanghai, mainly, in 1983, I only saw ONE obese person in two months. There were NO plump people at all. Everyone was slim. What a shame that it won't be long before they, too, have our weight problem. I don't remember seeing any fat people in Taipei either despite the American fast food restaurants there.

You handled those buffets admirably!

Runner - Thursday May 13, 2004

Weight: 115.0

I'm back from my trip, and I actually lost a pound! I think it was because I was able to be pretty active while at the hotel. There was an amazing pool and a decent weight room, so each morning I was able to go for a run, then swim, then lift weights. Total about 1 hour, 15 minutes of exercise. And the hotel served excellent food, but I stuck with the sushi, fish, eggs, and veggies. (Although I indulged in some ice cream each day!) Sometimes those all-you-can-eat buffets get old, anyway. I actually skipped out on a couple of them and had some snacks I'd packed just for a change of pace.

But I saw how my co-workers ate---they held nothing back! Every meal was a feast. You know, I used to eat like that more, and it was temporarily satisfying, but I always felt yucky afterward. Even though I still have my days when I overeat, I'm managing to keep them few and far in-between.

But now that I'm home, the temptation is there to start baking again. That's usually where I mess up. So even though I'm home, I need to exercise discipline.

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