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graindart - Sunday Sep 23, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 197.0

Day 19 completed successfully.

Yesterday was relatively straight forward.  No real hiccups or temptations. 

Don't know exactly what I'm going to do tonight as far as my eating.

Up until last night, the plan for tonight was to eat snow crab, baked cod, and some shrimp.  Tonight is having family over to our house to celebrate my birthday.  I invited the family about a week ago.  My one sister said her and her 3 kids would be coming.  I knew my mom and dad were coming.  My other sister said on Thursday that they would'nt be coming due to having 2 or 3 sick kids.  After I received that text message on Thursday, I let everyone else know that they wouldn't be coming.  Yesterday afternoon I went to the store and bought seafood and sides for 5 adults and 5 kids.  

Then last night around 7pm I get a message from the sister that was coming saying that her husband was now coming.  Then received another message from my other sister saying that they were feeling better.  She didn't come right out and ask if they could now attend, but I knew that that's why she sent the text saying that they were feeling better now.  Begrudgingly I sent a group text message saying that dinner was at 5pm and asking exactly who was going to show up.  Received return messages within a couple minutes and now have a total of 9 adults and 11 kids.  

The reason it doubled in numbers is because my sick sister has 6 regular kids (age 1-15), one adult kid (20), and I just found out her husband was back visiting and is coming (they're married, but he works out of state for months at a time).

So lots of emotions over the past 16 hours.  Mostly irritated at my sick sister and life in general.  But also irritated with myself that I'm irritated by the flip-flopping.  I know that I can feel justified in being unhappy about the change in plans.  I know I could've handled it differently and not re-opened the invitation process if that's what I really wanted.  I also know that I shouldn't be hung-up on last minute changes to plans.  People and family are more important to me than my own sense of fairness.  It's not like this is a common reoccurring pattern.  (If it were, I wouldn't have essentially reopened the invites.)

When it was going to be a total of 5 adults and 5 kids, I let them know that we were going to be having seafood.  As soon as it doubled to 20 people, I let everyone know that it changed and was now going to be spaghetti, pizza, and some sides.  (Privately I invited my mom & dad to come back again tomorrow night for the seafood.)

Writing it down has made me feel a bit better about it.  I had the final say and I chose to be gracious.  

While I chose the gracious route this time, I am not going to be a complete "saint" in regards to one thing.  My oldest daughter is 15 and got her real driver's license last month so she can now drive wherever without having an adult in the car.  We have only allowed it a few times for running quick errands and also to drive over to her grandparents house to show them the license (5 minutes away).  We haven't let anyone else in the family know due in part to my sick sister's oldest son (20 yrs old) still not having his full driver's license.  He doesn't have much ambition and is more than happy to have his mom drive him to / from his deadend job.  Other than that I think he just sits in the parent's basement either watching Netflix or playing Xbox.  While his laziness is an irritation to me, I haven't really wanted to rub salt in the wound by bringing up comparisons to my daughter's progress. 

Anyways....... When my sick sister's family wasn't coming, I had told my daughter that she would be going to pick up a pizza for the kids who didn't enjoy seafood from a place a few minutes away.  It's nothing major, but it does make her feel a sense of pride / freedom in being able to drive to the restaurant, order, pay, and bring it back. 

So now that my sick sister's family (including adult child) is coming...... if I was going to be a complete "saint", I'd have my wife pickup pizzas instead.  But I'm not.  My daughter will still be doing it without any other adults in the car.  I'll consider myself 95% gracious today, but with 5% passive-agressiveness thrown in.


Progress as of today: 86 lbs lost so far, only 22 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 09/23/2018:
I don't blame you a bit for being miffed at all of the flip flops......when you are providing the foo...you need to know those things...…..and I was glad to see that you are letting your daughter go get the pizzas...she deserves to be commended for her accomplishments......it's not her fault her cousin is a dud...I wouldn't rub his failures in...but I sure wouldn't make her suffer for his deficiencies. Maybe he will wake up and grow up!!! Anyway....I hope you have a nice day visiting and celebrating..….you have a lot to be thankful for......Happy Birthday!

graindart on 09/23/2018:
Have kept waiting for him to wake up and grow up. I think it's going to take an outside major change to shock him into changing. Pretty sure it won't happen until his parents give him a deadline date for moving out of their house.

I do feel somewhat sorry for him and the way his parents have raised him. He was always home schooled and has never really been forced to socialize with others. His closest cousin and sister are both 5 years younger than him, so the vast majority of his interaction has been with a tv / computer screen. But he has to realize that this doesn't need to affect the rest of his life. He can decide to change. And "yes", I and his other uncle have mentioned some of this to him over the past couple years in as nice a way as possible.

BearCountryGG on 09/23/2018:

Donkey on 09/23/2018:
Whoa, I completely get where you're coming from. I mean, a part for 9/11 is a completely different thing than a party for 5/5. I'm actually quite impressed that you're handling it as nicely as you are. I think I'd be more like 45% gracious and 45% passive aggressive and 10% straight-out pissed.

I would like to think that your family will remember you as being very gracious. I hope some good memories are made from this get-together.

The oldest son sounds a lot like my son... and quite a few other sons I know. Is it laziness? Is it Asperger's? Is it being an introvert? Why does this seem to be happening more and more with our young men?

Horn_of_plenty on 09/24/2018:
Good idea to save the seafood for a select few. Yes, i'd be annoyed to have to replan the dinner too and with the food and everything...i would also get annoyed as making plans isn't fun for me either. i understand you...

I do agree to with your judgement to let your daughter do the driving...enough is enough and they changed their mind...your sister changed her mind but you do not have to now go and change yours...good job!

and try not to let your sister continue flip flopping for the next time... :) good job overall to you! order some veggies with the pizza if you want to....

happy-1 on 10/01/2018:
You’re a class act all the way and did a great job on all of this. Happy Birthday! (belatedly)

graindart - Saturday Sep 22, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 196.8

 Day 18 completed successfully.

Little sleep yesterday made me cranky all day.  Got a decent night's sleep last night, so today should be better for the whole family.

Youngest has volleyball this morning and oldest has a church thing.  So wife and myself are splitting up and running different directions today.  Followed by schoolmates coming over in the afternoon to work on a science project.  Don't know what my plans are for later today.

Yesterday I started eating earlier in the day and didn't want to stop.  I've usually only been eating 200-400 calories before dinner and then eating a large dinner.  Since I had around 800 calories during the day yesterday, I didn't have as large of a dinner as usual and was still able to stay within my calorie limit.

I actually thought about jumping off this wagon yesterday.  My birthday is Monday and we're having family over to celebrate on Sunday.  If I would've gone off-plan yesterday, I would've probably remained off-plan until at least Tuesday.  So it's a good thing I decided not to do it yesterday.

On to conquer day 19.

Progress as of today: 86.2 lbs lost so far, only 21.8 lbs to go!

Donkey on 09/22/2018:
An observation: Seems to me that regardless of how often you contemplate going "off the wagon" (and I hear you on that), you never regret staying on plan, in retrospect. This is a GOOD thing, and perhaps something to consider in your contemplation (or should I say, temptation)...

BearCountryGG on 09/22/2018:
You are resisting a lot more...apparently it is getting easier and easier.…..the more you do something the easier it gets...….good going!!!

Horn_of_plenty on 09/23/2018:
Yes, it's much better indeed in your case to stay on the wagon!

when i was really really into not skipping exercise, i wouldn't let anything stop me. whether it was meetings or get togethers, i'd always just fit it in...especialyl with sleep, i wouldn't sleep as much if i was working out late at night and needing to get up in the morning....

now i do not sacrifice sleep as much, no!....but....staying on the wagon like you are doing with diet and myself when it came to exercise....it's the only way to reach your goal!

happy-1 on 10/01/2018:
Slow and steady (and on plan) wins the race. You are building good habits and keeping it off this time.

graindart - Friday Sep 21, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 195.8

 Day 17 completed successfully.

Woke up at 3:30am.  Couldn't get back to sleep, so got up for the day.  It's now inching towards my normal wakeup time of 6am and I'm starting to feel quite tired.  Probably going to feel tired all day and I'm not looking forward to it at all.
On to conquer day 18....

Progress as of today: 87.2 lbs lost so far, only 20.8 lbs to go!

Donkey on 09/21/2018:
I had a similar night of bad/no sleep. Must remember NOT to fight fatigue with food!

BTW, nice weigh-in!

legcramps on 09/21/2018:
We need magic sleep juice :) that has no effect on us except to make us super sleepy.

graindart on 09/21/2018:
....and thinner as we sleep.

BearCountryGG on 09/21/2018:
Nice new weight...and that super in control weekend helped make that possible.….

graindart on 09/21/2018:
Happy about not screwing up last weekend. Sunday we're having family over for dinner to celebrate my birthday. Hoping to make it through balancing food intake with remaining relatively happy.

Horn_of_plenty on 09/21/2018:
for me, when i'm waking up at night, it's because of caffeine too late in the day...i hope you start to sleep better!

graindart - Thursday Sep 20, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 198.2

Day 16 completed successfully.

Don't have any normal work sitting on my desk today, but have to take my oldest daughter to her monthly teeth braces adjustment.  At 3pm we're heading out of town to a volleyball game about an hour and a half away.  It's a small town in the middle of nowhere, so won't be tempted by any restaurants.  Just have to avoid the concession stand and my day should be straight-forward.  Going to use the spare time today to clean my office and a couple other errands.

On to conquer day 17.

Progress as of today: 84.8 lbs lost so far, only 23.2 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 09/20/2018:
You are doing great!

innerpeace on 09/20/2018:
OMG I am just dreading all the braces stuff coming up in my life. I was just anticipating about $3500 grand with my insurance, I hope I don't have to pay as much as you did. Holy Cow!

graindart - Wednesday Sep 19, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 198.0

Day 15 completed successfully.

Bought parsnip, rutabaga, and turnip at the grocery store yesterday and roasted them in the oven.  Parsnips tasted like carrots.......and I don't like carrots.  Won't be buying parsnips again.  Rutabaga tasted like a milder brussel sprout.  Would prefer brussel spouts.  Won't be buying rutabaga again.  Turnip was very mild and reminded me more of a potato with a slightly different flavor.  Could see buying turnips again, but not in the near future.

Dirt biking went good and saw some wild turkeys.  It's the end of the riding season and several of my riding buddies have transitioned over to bow hunting.  I don't hunt, but have effectively transitioned over to my youngest daughter's volleyball season.  So mostly done with riding until spring time, except for a couple of outings at lower elevations over the winter if it's mild.

On to conquer day 16...

Progress as of today: 85 lbs lost so far, only 23 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 09/19/2018:
that's cool you tried the other veggies...did you season them with some salt and pepper? if the turnip, you can always mix 'em with potato for another change.

also good roasted are cauliflower :) eggplant, peppers even...of course with a little olive oil. good for you on your attempt of trying new things!

awww, that's cool to see wild turkeys...i think i saw them once in a carribbean island or maybe it was Hawaii!? i went somewhere, they were all around :) but not here!

i hope you find another good escape if dirt biking is done...that burns some calories and gets you outside...maybe some hikes still with family? stay active, don't let all activity on your part cease because you will feel better when you are active, trust me!

once, when my injuries were at their height, i didn't exercise at all or walk much AT ALL for 3 months. i gained weight. i was very sedentary. i was in pain. and i became very depressed. luckily, i braved thru it, things improved, and i pushed onwards to once again seeking out fitness and ways to fit it into my schedule. i'm glad i chose that approach rather than giving up.!!!

graindart on 09/20/2018:
I didn't season the veggies with anything and just basically dry roasted them in the oven. I know they would've tasted better with seasoning, but wanted to see what they actually tasted like and not cover up their natural tastes. Since the turnip wasn't bad, I'll probably try it again with seasoning.

Horn_of_plenty on 09/19/2018:
and actually, i didn't regain all my weight, it was just a little blip in time and i was already very into veggies and transitioned away from binging, it was just like 4 years ago or so. so my weight went up, but i was able to bring it down after starting up with weights, and later some cardio...then when my sister got married 2 years ago, and i also got sick once more but not an injury, just exhaustion a couple years ago i think because i was just overworked too much overtime and horrible sleep, i took 5 weeks off work. came back lighter, then pushed on and basically lost the last 10 lbs in 6months overall and have kept it off with only minor gains and losses for two years. :)

BearCountryGG on 09/19/2018:
Definitely different flavors...and all pretty white and potato looking...….probably why they just don't draw peoples eye......I suspect that the brighter colored veggies have more nutrients anyway.

happy-1 on 09/19/2018:
I went to look for a potato but it didn’t turnip :-D

Donkey on 09/20/2018:
You are brave to try new vegetables. I've been so tempted to try leeks. Although your vegetable adventure was not entirely delicious, I am going to try to work up the courage to give these vegetables a try.

graindart - Tuesday Sep 18, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 198.4

Day 14 completed successfully.

Pretty bored with recent food choices.  Roamed the local grocery store last night.  Should've taken a different route, because the donut's looked delicious.  Briefly contemplated buying one since I had calories to spare, but decided that doing so might trigger a fall from the wagon, so I didn't.  Came home with a turnip, rutabagas, and a parsnip.  I'm sure I've eaten them before at some time in my life, but don't think I've ever cooked them myself.  Will mess with them over the next couple days.

Going dirt biking in the mountains today with a friend.  Probably going to be one of the last days this year we go into the higher elevations.  Should be getting snow in the upper elevations pretty soon.

Off to conquer day 15...

Progress as of today: 84.6 lbs lost so far, only 23.4 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 09/18/2018:
Good food choices.....and a good day of burning calories...

BearCountryGG on 09/18/2018:
The power of suggestion is so difficult....the commercials, I turn on cooking shows out of habit......magazines ( at least womens magazines...) put diets right next to recipes...and it seems cruel....definitely seeing and hearing things...or finding them in MY house..…in fact shopping...in the store and online...just all seems like triggers......walking away and sticking to your plan is empowering.....I have to say that I did buy a few things yesterday that really are not doing me any good having them around...….I'm counting calories...and I have been mad at myself ever since...but I need to get the strength that you had in the store....like you...I have a birthday in a couple of days...and I will celebrate...but it scares me.

graindart on 09/18/2018:
I haven't decided what I'm going to do for the family get together on my birthday as far as food is concerned.

Part of me obviously thinks I should do whatever I want and overeat all that I want.......it's just one day......

The other part of me is happy to be back on track and in the groove. Right now I'm feeling good and things are moving in the right direction. I really don't want an instant 5+ lb uptick in the scale.

So right now, I'm leaning towards not going off-plan for my birthday, but that could all quickly change when I see the desserts.

BearCountryGG on 09/18/2018:
If you can do that then that is the right thing.

BearCountryGG on 09/18/2018:
I'm definitely thinking that virgos are especially plagued with this.....we like things in order...and when they get out of order...we are especially frustrated until things change...……...I know that I get into my own way so much....kind of like tripping over my own feet......

happy-1 on 09/18/2018:
I woke up in the middle of the night and heard my dad’s tv blaring about pizza and calzones. I just put in my earplugs.

I like the tactic of trying something new that’s healthy instead.

I like to dice turnips, carrots and potatoes toss with oil and salt and make roasted root veggies. Turnips don’t last overnight once they are cooked though so eat them all and don’t store. It gets bitter.

BearCountryGG on 09/18/2018:
Very good idea Happy has there.

graindart - Monday Sep 17, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 199.5

Day 13 completed successfully.

Yesterday was spent winterizing things (hoses, AC, RV, lit gas fireplace pilot).

Today I have to get some regular work done.  Yesterday was pretty easy to stay under calorie allotment.  In theory today should be fairly easy too, although I'm thinking about food while sitting here typing this.

On to conquer day 14....

Progress as of today: 83.5 lbs lost so far, only 24.5 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 09/17/2018:
You r doing great!!! Keeping busy helps a lot!

horn_of_plenty on 09/17/2018:
I'm winterizing my apartment this year: i bought weights for home workouts, a workout bench, weighted bar, i also just purchased a daylight alarm clock.

i am making a big effort to keep with my routine this Winter!

my thoughts always go to food as a distraction...you might be bored!

happy-1 on 09/17/2018:
Good job of distracting yourself from food!

Donkey on 09/18/2018:
I hope it was a good day for you. I tend to fantasize about food at night. I just wrote that, and thinking that's pretty messed up...

graindart - Sunday Sep 16, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 199.6

Day 12 completed successfully.

Yesterday I just had some sunflower seeds and zero calorie drinks while on the drive.  Technically I did try one of each of the family's snacks that they got.  I had 1 Pringles chip, 1 salt & vinegar Lays chip, 1 sour patch kid, and 2 or 3 small sips of my wife's orange cream soda.

Went and watched the go-kart racing.  One of my friends is involved with them and the rest were all friendly and willing to offer up information on getting involved.  One even offered to let me take his kart out for a couple laps.  I thanked him for the offer, but declined and just watched the racing with my oldest daughter.  It was interesting and I may or may not be picking up a kart now.  Did quite a bit of research into them on the internet when I got home.  

Pulled back into town around dinner time and we went out to Applebees for dinner since neither my wife nor I really had any desire to make dinner.  I've got my go-to dish there that easily keeps me under my daily calorie count, so it worked out well.

On to conquer day 13.....

Progress as of today: 83.4 lbs lost so far, only 24.6 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 09/16/2018:
Congratulations for succeeding when it could have been difficult...….it's nice to have a success to draw on in the future too.

graindart on 09/16/2018:
Very happy now at my decision to stay on-plan. Otherwise with 2-3 days off-plan, the scale would've registered approximately 212-ish and I would've felt semi-depressed over it.

Donkey on 09/16/2018:
I admit that go-karting sounds like it could be a lot of fun. I didn't even realize this was a thing to do. I should see if there's stuff like that in my area to do.

Well done on moderating the treats. I really like that you got a taste of everyone's snacks and then stopped at that. GOOD JOB. That is how behavior modification is accumulated. It really is a process.

I hadn't considered ever having a "go to" meal at the restaurants that I frequent - which ain't all that frequent - but that is a GREAT idea. I'm going to start keeping a list.

graindart on 09/16/2018:
It's a little boring having a go-to meal, but since I already know what I'm ordering I'm not tempted to order the super-terrific-limited-time-new-taste-explosion-super-duper-special-new-meal offering that probably packs 2000 calories into it.

Horn_of_plenty on 09/17/2018:
i love having tastes of people's food....it's not many calories for just a few tastes....excellent job!!!!!!!!!!!

happy-1 on 09/17/2018:
What’s your go to at Applebee’s? I thought that place was wall to wall sodium, sugar, and fat?

graindart - Saturday Sep 15, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 202.0

Day 11 completed successfully.

Just had some sunflower seeds and zero calorie drinks on the drive. After the volleyball games, we went out to eat at a sushi restaurant. I don't know the exact calorie counts, but ate a reasonable amount.

After dinner, I did think I should reward myself with an ice cream cone from McDonald's. Decided against it. Then there was a McDonald's directly adjacent to the hotel we were staying, so thought I'd reward myself with 3 chocolate chip cookies for $1. Probably would've, but had the family with me, so just pulled into the hotel instead.

Sitting here in the hotel lobby watching my youngest daughter eat breakfast. Not really tempted to eat anything. We didn't get to the restaurant until around 8:30p last night, so my tummy still feels rather full.

On to conquer day 12.

Progress as of today: 81 lbs lost so far, only 27 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 09/15/2018:
Oh the perils of the free hotel breakfast. All those simple carbs

graindart on 09/16/2018:
Exactly. In times past, I've fallen off the wagon and probably eaten 2000+ calories worth of worthless crap at hotel breakfasts to start off my day. Worked out ok this time, so kept my streak alive.

Donkey on 09/15/2018:
I find that getting back on track is the hardest part -- which is why, I think, for the most part, my "relax" day (Saturdays, after weigh-in) haven't been so relaxing. Just easier to stay on track.

graindart on 09/16/2018:
Getting back on the wagon is definitely the hardest part for me. Especially when I see a 5-10 lb jump in the scale when I go off plan for a day or two in a row.

BearCountryGG on 09/16/2018:
Sounds like it is all going well with you...….

Horn_of_plenty on 09/17/2018:
Nice job....yes, listen to your body.

Proud of you for not having Mcdonalds...it could have triggered a binge so i'm glad you stayed away from it for now.

graindart - Friday Sep 14, 2018
(30 days - weigh & post daily)
Weight: 202.0

Day 10 completed successfully.

Have some work to get caught up on this morning and leaving for the out-of-town volleyball trip around 1pm.  Looking forward to getting out of town.  Swinging by a different city on our back Saturday afternoon and going to watch some gokart racing.  Have been thinking about getting back into some type of car / gokart racing that I could get my 15 year old daughter into.

On to conquer day 11....  (unless the out-of-town trip causes me to fall off the wagon....)

Progress as of today: 81 lbs lost so far, only 27 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 09/14/2018:
Have fun with your family!

Donkey on 09/14/2018:
Stay strong!

horn_of_plenty on 09/14/2018:
GoKart racing sounds so funnnnnn!

have fun and like Jdonk says, STAY STRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! conquer it and drive forward!

happy-1 on 09/14/2018:
Aw, good dad looking for stuff you can do with your girls!!!! Sniff.

Stay strong! They learn from you! You can do it! https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qztuEucrNBc

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