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graindart - Wednesday Aug 01, 2018
(just getting back in control)
Weight: 211.7

August 1st......time to get back in control of my eating.  Most of this post is for my own records.  I'll sum it up so you don't have to read it all.  I've overeaten the past 2 months.  Today I get back on track.

For me, there always seems to be a reason or event to feel like celebrating by overeating.  The food rarely tastes good, but I still consume mass quantities of it.  June and July saw me take in boatloads of processed food that had little actual good flavor.  Over the past couple months I've eaten a ton of chocolate chip cookies and donuts.  The first usually tastes decent, but by the time I get to the 10th cookie in a row it really doesn't taste good at all.  Yet, I continue shoving them in my mouth until the package is empty.

Yesterday we took the girls to the state fair.  I knew it was my last day off-diet, so planned on eating every possible thing I could think of.  I succeeded in stuffing my face all day and am sitting at the computer with a very uncomfortable bloated belly this morning.  First thing I ate at the fair was a pulled pork bbq sandwich with mac-n-cheese.  It tasted good and would've been fine if I stopped afterward.  I walked up and down the food section and nothing else seemed overly enticing.  Went and watched the girls ride various fair rides.  Out of boredom I went back to the food area and settled on a corn dog.  Didn't taste impressive, but I finished it.  Ate some mediocre ice cream a little later before heading home.  I knew dinner was going to be my last pigout for awhile, so took the family to a buffet.  Ate a lot.  The steak was actually good, but most everything else was pretty bland.  After dinner, before bedtime, ended up eating cookies, chocolate covered pretzels, cupcakes, bananas, and some other stuff I don't even remember.  None of it sticks out as tasting good, just kept filling my face with sugar.

Like I said, I always find an event or reason to justify my desire to overeat.  And any time I overeat, it usually turns into a full day or two thing.  If it were confined to only an hour or two every once in awhile, it really wouldn't matter.  The past couple months have been filled with events that I've decided justified my overeating.  But now they've left me in a place where I'm physically feeling like crap......jiggly crap.  

Looking forward through August, there are a few events that are going to be tough to get through without overeating.  Probably taking the family camping a couple times (usually eat a ton of marshmallows, smores, hot dogs, chips, candy, etc).  My dad's birthday party for the whole family will have a lot of carbs available.  Church picnic coming up will have every imaginable type of dessert.  Near the end of the month, one of my daughters will have their first volleyball tournament which will have lots of concession food available. 

I've got a few days to figure out a plan to beat those temptations.  Right now I just need to concentrate on getting a string of successful days under my belt.  I just need to get back in the everyday routine of eating right.

On to day 1......

Progress as of today: 71.3 lbs lost so far, only 36.7 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 08/01/2018:
One thing that can be said about that first bite...is that if it is tasty....you will know it.....after that...the second bite will be good....and then...it quickly moves onto just shoveling food in............without tasting anything at all.....it becomes a conquest....of "can I consume all of it?".....bites 1 and 2 are Great...after that...not so much....if we can internalize that concept...we can enjoy the things we love to eat......and eat only those first two bites.....I have always considered myself a human garbage can...because I ate things that needed to be used up...or I felt that I needed to eat things that I didn't like because they were there and waste not want not.....over times...I came to realize that eating things that were not enjoyable meant that I would lug them around with me for life...plastered on my body.....every step I took (take)...I'm carrying them with me...and suddenly...it finally clicked...I could have eaten less...and not cooked so much...or not put so much on my plate...or I could have actually put it in the garbage ( that is the difficult one for me). Somewhere in our lives.....food became way to important...maybe because we didn't have enough...or maybe because it was used as a reward....or maybe because we were taught not to waste anything ( me).One thing we should remember is that there will always be food....we don't have to eat it all right this minute. I hope you have a good day.

legcramps on 08/01/2018:
I hear you about how hard it is to stop or gain control, I just recently went through this myself when I went to the ribfest and gorged on meat. I find it a lot harder in the summer too, when it's bbq season and ice cream is just so nice on a hot hot day!

You can do this. A lot of it is mind over matter.

graindart on 08/02/2018:
In years past, I found my appetite diminish during the Summer months due to the heat. But not this year. And it seems this year that I've got one or two events every week that want to derail my eating goals.

Donkey on 08/02/2018:
I think one of the hardest mindsets I've had to overcome and change is the idea that I have to finish what I started eating.

A few things that helped: Had someone recommend that I should throw out what I don't finish, with the thinking that if I eat the rest, I'm essentially eating garbage. True.

Referencing my latest comment to Maria, I often take one portion and divide it up so that I feel like I'm getting more than just one.

Eventually learning to relish having the control over my portions. Being proud of myself for saying "STOP. ENOUGH" -- stopping the self-abuse of binge eating and standing up for myself. Crazy?

innerpeace on 08/02/2018:
I know all about binging. Just stay active and maybe this will help. It is an ongoing struggle.

happy-1 on 08/02/2018:
Did you grow up with a lot of siblings? Competition for food?

graindart on 08/02/2018:
No, just two younger sisters. Just years and years of bad habits on my part.

horn_of_plenty on 08/02/2018:
I have also ran into these periods were i want to splurge. Only way i'm able to stay in control is my own volume eating. I eat things that literally expand my stomach and make me full. And i plan to eat these things. I plan to buy these things. My lifestyle has totally altered to help me maintain my weight as you see from my entries.

The longer i have maintained (basically with small ups and downs) my weight, the more i want to keep maintaining. The longer you keep a plan and lifestyle of eating, the easier it gets because you learn to eat in a way you enjoy and can keep for life.

Try to make a good plan of something you can StICK with. perhaps it's light eating for you all day...like grapefruit, etc. egg whites scrambled at breakfast...etc...and then bigger meal for dinner. ? find somethign you are HAPPY to stick with. If it's a hassle, it is not worth keeping a lifestyle that is a struggle. Mine is NOT a struggle. I honestly enjoy it. that's why i keep it up.

in the end, if you are happy with the lifestyle / diet choices, you'll keep it up. it does involve planning / buying / purchasing and doing things that make it EASIER and less of a struggle to keep up.

lots of takeout places make veggies. it has become easier for me to stick to my eating lifestyle and go out to eat. the veggies i order are mostly in sauces, not steamed anymore. it's very possible to enjoy flavor and not let it be a weight buster.

graindart - Wednesday Jul 18, 2018
(OMAD, LCHF, counting calories)
Weight: 191.4

Yesterday went decent, not great.  Started off great, but ended with some extra bran muffins with butter and a banana late at night that I really didn't need. 

Last regular season softball game was last night.  Tournament in 10 days and then it  will be done for the season.

Dirt biking was decent yesterday for the first few hours.  Then it started raining and got cold fast.  Totally drenched and almost shivering by the time we made it back to the trucks for the ride home.  Still much better than a day spent in the office.....

On to conquer today.....


Progress as of today: 91.6 lbs lost so far, only 16.4 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 07/18/2018:
even if yesterday wasn't perfect, you did better than usual and didn't go totally off the deep end...bran at least is very filling...and a banana is healthy for potassium. better than usual thank a total binge-fest.

i'd also agree you're having a good day...keep on! rememember, success doesn't have to be all or nothing...it can be in the middle. that's my success these days...could be better and could be worst but never the best and never the worst right now.

legcramps on 07/18/2018:
Dirt biking! Fun!

happy-1 on 07/19/2018:
Go you!

Donkey on 07/19/2018:
I hope your Wednesday was a good day. Regarding biking, yes, no matter how "miserable" the conditions, still better than the best day at the office, right?

Donkey on 07/22/2018:
Just checking in to see how you're doing.

happy-1 on 07/27/2018:
How are u doing? Don't forget about us!

graindart - Tuesday Jul 17, 2018
(OMAD, LCHF, counting calories)
Weight: 189.5

Back in control yesterday, for a new successful day 1.

Went to our school's sponsored night at the local minor league baseball team last night.  The girls had some fun, but I was bored out of my mind.  I have some friends that have season tickets and show up 2 or 3 times per week to watch.  I don't know how they do it.  I'd rather just go to bed and sleep....

Going dirt biking today and have packed several zero calorie drinks.  Have a softball game tonight after getting back from the mountains.

On to conquer day 2.....

Progress as of today: 93.5 lbs lost so far, only 14.5 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 07/17/2018:
2-3 times per week is toooooo big a commitment. sorry you were bored with even one night...i guess you didn't have close friends there, i'm sure your daughters were occupied with their own friends too...

Your plans for today sound great! enjoy your time outdoors. it's so healthy and wonderful..!

conquer your plans.

bearcountrygg on 07/17/2018:
Maybe not so much in to baseball????

Donkey on 07/18/2018:
I just can't sit so long to watch baseball any more. If I were playing and getting actual exercise and benefit, then I'd be OK with it. If I'm sitting with the husband while he watches, I'm usually reading and knitting as well. Just sitting and watching--- no can do. Maybe this is a sign that I've said good-bye to a sedentary lifestyle.

graindart - Monday Jul 16, 2018
(OMAD, LCHF, counting calories)
Weight: 195.0

Foodwise, Saturday went well, Sunday didn't. Family is home safe and sound.

I have to drive a few hours for work again today, so will need to pack some zero calorie drinks.  I dropped the caffeinated drinks a week ago to see if that had any affect.  It didn't appear to.  So I'm now back to drinking zero calorie drinks that also contain caffeine if I want.

Daughter's school has a get-together at the local minor league baseball game tonight.  It'll be fun for them to see their friends again.  

Off to work for me....


Progress as of today: 88 lbs lost so far, only 20 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 07/16/2018:
Glad all the ladies made it home safe and sound...I'm sure you are happy for that. You had lots of good days on your program...so you took a day off for you.....life goes on...

horn_of_plenty on 07/16/2018:
you have a good schedule...it's ok to have a day where you slip, get back on the saddle when you can, hopefully quicker as you get use to getting back on the saddle. it's not about being perfect, but how to pick yourself up after a fall!

graindart - Saturday Jul 14, 2018
(OMAD, LCHF, counting calories)
Weight: 189.5

Day 6 completed successfully.

Just running errands and doing a little cleaning before picking the family up from the airport later tonight.  Making beef ribs with veggies for our dinner tonight. 

On to conquer day 7.....

Progress as of today: 93.5 lbs lost so far, only 14.5 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 07/14/2018:
Excellent meal plan and enjoy seeing your family tonight's !!! Keep on!

happy-1 on 07/14/2018:
Aaaaaw... someone's excited to see the fam if they made a fancy dinner!

graindart on 07/14/2018:
Always miss them when we're apart. Have fresh flower arrangements in each of their bedrooms also to welcome them back.

bearcountrygg on 07/14/2018:
Don't forget to clean the house!!!

graindart on 07/14/2018:
Waiting on the dishwasher and wiping a few counters down.

Horn_of_plenty on 07/14/2018:
sorry about typos...was at the beach on my phone!

Donkey on 07/15/2018:
Good man, there -- very impressed with the flowers idea.

Dinner sounds yummy. I hope it was a happy reunion with your family :-)

graindart - Friday Jul 13, 2018
(OMAD, LCHF, counting calories)
Weight: 190.4

Day 5 completed successfully.

Yesterday was supposed to be a fairly easy day working, but turned into a huge headache and several more hours than anticipated.

My take on low carb high fat is pretty boring and repetetive.  I know that I could spice things up by researching recipes, but have little desire to put in any effort when my portion sizes are smaller than I'd prefer.  The good thing about boring and repetitive is that it's pretty easy to stay on track. 

Today's my last full day of being a bachelor.  The wife and daughters return tomorrow evening.  Have some work to accomplish in the morning, then hope to get some cleaning / organizing accomplished.  Will start with my office and see what I can get accomplished.  There's a chance that additional work may come in, but usually Fridays are slower.

On to conquer day 6.

Progress as of today: 92.6 lbs lost so far, only 15.4 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2018:
HELLO GAINS!! : -))))

Firstly, congrats to you on a Day 5 Success!! Good Good Job. I have gone thru stages in my own lifestyle changes where I did countdowns / counts. Those times helped me get to where I am at today. I don’t see myself stopping the calorie counting for a long time coming…for me, my days of countdowns involved once again calorie counting but I’d do averages for longer periods of time (even like a full month) and also I’d see how long I could “hold out” with a series of good days before I’d binge…now, my pace has changed a little from that approach…and I try to have in general good weeks, weekly averages. I know some days will be higher than others but that I can work it out throughout the week, trying to make everyday a moderate day.

I’ve gotten farther and farther away from binges. I did that by having less caffeine, getting more sleep, learning more about myself, and trying to get a good balance of fats/carbs/proteins to where I am not craving things to such a high degree. I’ve also gotten used to eating in a way that works for attaining the goals I want.

You’ve read what I eat…I’ve totally shaped my lifestyle and food choices for what works for me. Sometimes I yearn to be more natural in my food selection and less artificial, but for the time being I’ll say I’m pretty content with where I’m at now.

There are some groups I’m a member of that is specifically low carb high fat on facebook. LCHF is the acronym. You may want to google that. Maybe pinterest has photos/recipes. There are a lot of easy ones, you know, especially pertaining to desserts / heavy whipped cream / etc. I understand you not interested at the moment in recipes…I think the diet / lifestyle of low carb is still new to you – another reason you may not be interested yet in other recipes. And of course, you can cook veggies in similar ways you’d flavor all your favorite dishes, just without the grains, give them flavor.

One easy way for most veggies is roasting…just a little salt/pepper/oil and once in awhile even balsamic vinegar, roast in the oven. Tastes SO GOOD. Way better than steamed. If you want less oil, you can even roast partially without the oil, but remember your body needs the fat…I’ve done low fat at one point and my hair got sooooo dry and damaged, skin horrible, nails horrible. I wish I hadn’t done that – but I learned from it! I was so young. I think a senior in college. So bad…a learning experience. I have done a lot of tests on my own body throughout my lifestyle adventures..i still do.

With it being your last day alone, I suggest a good food shopping. Go get the things that’ll help you while they are back home. GET PREPARED. Being unprepared without the better options is going to make your life more of an annoying challenge and will make it too easy to get off track. I challenge you to find ways to make it easier to maintain your lower weight…for the long run. If you do it for the long run, you’ll have to find ways to eat and drink and a lifestyle that makes keeping the lower weight easy. For instance, without being able to indulge in cooked veggies often, I’d be having a MUCH harder time never being able to feel so full or I’d just get fat getting full on calorie dense options instead of veggies.

In order to maintain your weight / lose a little weight, you’ve got to have a system in place that you LIKE or even LOVE…that you know you can do for the long run…that actually becomes your lifestyle. I still struggle here and there because I’m always eating at the highest calorie range and have trouble eating on the lower end of what’s necessary to maintain, but I seem to be able to fix that when I really have to..

I did have to develop a system that works for me…and the system came into place slowly with many trials and errors. I have lots of memories from my past similar to what you are doing now. You are doing great, keep on, keep learning, keep challenging yourself, and keep your mind open to little changes that can help you.

My biggest change as of late is to remember not to push myself over my limits. That injuries aren’t worth it. To NOT work thru pain. To rest sometimes instead of work out….to listen to my body more. Past scenarios have practically forced me to use this sort of approach. But I also try to remember not to get to lax on my cardio…which is my hardest challenge always. As I’m looking to improve, so I still work to make it part of my schedule, but try to balance it still with rest and the rest of my life. It’s all a learning process, I think always, to find some balance with everything!

i had fun here, a break at work! just now :)

graindart on 07/13/2018:
Would like to develop a system of my own that I could live with on a daily basis, like you're able to. After I get back down into the 170's again, I'm planning on switching to maintenance mode for awhile. I'm good at gaining weight and pretty good at losing it, but just maintaining in one spot has never been my strength.

It would really be beneficial if I could get out of the habit of "all or nothing" and embrace moderate eating habits. An initial thought is trying to just maintain a weekly average weight in the 170's through the end of the year, instead of dealing with things on a daily basis. Of course, I need to get back into the 170's again before that can happen......

horn_of_plenty on 07/13/2018:

bearcountrygg on 07/13/2018:
YES....Get that house cleaned up!!!

Donkey on 07/14/2018:
Maintenance is an interesting journey. Like you, I too struggled with maintaining for years. (Hence, the reason I gained and lost the same 50-60 pounds over and over...) I look forward to "walking with you" when you get to that point. I know you'll get there :-)

graindart - Thursday Jul 12, 2018
(OMAD, LCHF, counting calories)
Weight: 190.2

Day 4 completed successfully.

Didn't get much accomplished yesterday, but it was partially relaxing.  Ended up doing a few hours of regular work and a few hours of other stuff I was wanting to work on.

Working most of today, although if I'd get a bit more drive I could probably be done mid-afternoon.  Feeling lazy and generally burnt out as far as work.  I tend to get this way most summers.  I think it has to do with seeing my wife and kids getting to take the summer off (wife works at school).  In my mind, I should be able to take the summer off too......

Off to conquer day 5.

Progress as of today: 92.8 lbs lost so far, only 15.2 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 07/12/2018:
I tend to get that feeling in the summer, too. I used to teach for a few years and was a student even 2 years after i stopped teaching, until i was 28. So, from 28-35 years old is the only time i've had to work EVERY week of summer. while a teacher, i did teach summer school, but usually only 1 month or 6 weeks. still some time off. and never a long day like i do now. Everyone, in my opinion, should have more of a "teacher schedule." !!!

bearcountrygg on 07/12/2018:
That must be difficult when everyone else is having fun.

graindart - Wednesday Jul 11, 2018
(OMAD, LCHF, counting calories)
Weight: 192.0

Day 3 completed successfully.

Yesterday was spent mostly just working / sitting in front of the computer screen. 

Ended the day with a softball game.  When I signed up to play this season, I thought it was going to be fun and something that I looked forward to.  Quite the opposite.  So far I really don't enjoy playing and it feels like just another committment on my calendar that I have to do.  I committed to it, so will continue through this season, but highly doubt I'll sign up again next year.

After a softball game a few weeks ago, the family was walking back to the parking lot.  I commented that I didn't really think that softball was "my game".  One of my daughters quickly piped up and said: "Yeah dad.  And by the way we beat you playing 'HORSE' the other day, I'd say basketball isn't 'your game' either."  (HORSE is a basketball shooting game.)  (She said it as a joke, not to be demeaning or disrespectful.)

Worked quite a bit yesterday so that I could kind of take a day off today.  Nothing fun planned, but am just getting some non-work tasks completed today.

On to conquer day 4.....

Progress as of today: 91 lbs lost so far, only 17 lbs to go!

innerpeace on 07/11/2018:
Have you liked playing in the past? I have troubles finding things I like to do as well. I just hope it doesn't turn tedious to you.

graindart on 07/11/2018:
Haven't really played softball / baseball since I was 10 years old (30+ years ago). Thought it would be fun to try again. Found out that I'd prefer not having the additional scheduled commitments, especially during the summer.

bearcountrygg on 07/11/2018:
Sounds like when kids join a team and then don't enjoy it….but we make them continue on anyway......at least you are setting a good example for the kids!! Hope the season goes by quickly!

happy-1 on 07/11/2018:
Ha ha ha ha ha... This is how I feel about almost everything. I don't enjoy it until I've adapted to it and then can think about things going on in it that are interesting.

Maybe tennis? The back and forth ponging of the ball is super satisfying/zen meditative and I can totally focus on it and enjoy it. Plus lessons with your girls would help them learn something new too.

I guess tennis is to me as laser pointers are to cats.

Donkey on 07/11/2018:
I loved baseball/softball as a kid. Now I just don't have the patience for it, even when my team is winning. Watching, participating - nope, the love is gone.

I've been thinking about your needing to find a goal (before you decided to do another OMAD), but I see you've already come to the conclusion that I had: sometimes, a goal can be a series of successful days. Heck, sometimes, getting through ONE day is goal enough!

I was also going to suggest maybe adding a mile a day on the treadmill -- what would that take you, maybe 15 minutes depending on if you ran or walked. But then I realized that exercise-oriented goals aren't really your thing. And that's fine. Bodies are built at the table, not at the gym.

horn_of_plenty on 07/12/2018:
Well, in order to get better at anything, you need practice. Perhaps that's what's going on with your game? also, maybe it's just a personality thing and those are players' personalities are not meshing with yours? then i could understand not wanting to play on the team again...

good job on Day 3.

graindart on 07/12/2018:
Not a personality thing, everyone's very friendly and supportive. Not really about the game itself or my skill level. I think I'd just rather not have the additional weekly commitment.

horn_of_plenty on 07/12/2018:
i understand exactly what you mean about a commitment that at first it seems fun until the actual commitment of it leaves you stressed...that is starting to be my problem this summer...fun commitments but not enough alone time and it's not meshing well for me or my stress levels.

graindart - Tuesday Jul 10, 2018
(OMAD, LCHF, counting calories)
Weight: 194.0

Day 2 successfully completed.

Yesterday had a 4 hour monotonous round trip drive for work.  Packed some drinks / snack and was able to stay on track.

Summer really kicked in and the highs have been 92-99 pretty much every day for the past week or so.  Saturday the high is supposed to be in the 70's, which will be a nice change.  Not looking forward to playing softball tonight in the mid-90's.

On to conquer day 3.....

Progress as of today: 89 lbs lost so far, only 19 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 07/10/2018:
Good day staying with your program!

happy-1 on 07/10/2018:
You're clearly built Ford tough!

Horn_of_plenty on 07/10/2018:
so proud of you! really loving your post today too!

good plans for the drive...good to be prepared. i had a lighter lunch, thank gosh!, today...because i planned it!

graindart - Monday Jul 09, 2018
(OMAD, LCHF, counting calories)
Weight: 194.0

Just a quick entry before jumping into work stuff.

Did a 4 week round of OMAD with LCHF a few months ago.  With my recent difficulty in getting back on track, I decided to give it another try.  So yesterday went successfully, although it's a good thing that I had limited quantity of food on hand at home.  While I had no desire to overeat the food I had on hand, I probably would've continued munching if there would've been a bag of pork rinds in the house.  On to conquer day 2.

Progress as of today: 89 lbs lost so far, only 19 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 07/09/2018:
Glad you have decided to work on that again.

horn_of_plenty on 07/09/2018:
Yes ! Loving your winning attitude ! Love this entry !

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