Sun 9-25-22 7:15am:
Had a hard time getting to sleep last night. I lost my sleep headphones somewhere in the house a couple of days ago and sm waiting for a second pair to arrive today. Yesterday was tiring, I ate extra, and I got too run down by bedtime. More emotional. Everytime I closed my eyes I'd flash on hugging my mom or the nurse starting the morphine drip for my dad and sleep just wasn't happening without my Get Sleepy to distract me. I got up and had a turkey sandwich which was a mistake. Drove overnight sugars sky high and didn't charge my body battery. Supposed to go to park yoga again today (different park today). I have no energy.
I should get up and walk 10-20 min after each meal on top of the yoga starting today... but I don't feel so great about that... I turned Citizen app notifications back on on my phone after the shots fired outside my house a couple of weeks ago. I know my neighborhood isn't posh but it's not that bad... but I had no idea how many assaults there are daily. I carry pepper spray but I'm not feeling super hot. It's not as good but I think I will just ride my bike in my room after meals this week instead.
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
Sat 9-24-22 6:30am
Had a dream where I got to hug my mom, with a strong sense of not enough time. Then my alarm went off. Have been crying a little.
9h of sleep, enough REM, and a 72 body battery to go do park yoga today.
Grrrr... Get after it.
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
8pm - melatonin. Watching some lord of the rings thing.
A friend drove 2h to big bear to go to a yoga festival… and didn’t do any yoga!
https://www.bigbearyogafestival.com/schedule#saturday
Yes, I could see you as a yoga teacher and finding it quite fulfilling.
Fri 9-23-22 8am:
Sugar still too high. Not going down at all. 239. I don't know what to do. An adult fitness camp for diabetes might be the next step.
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
10 drank half gallon of alkaline water.
11:30 sugar dropped to 213. Holding out till 1pm to eat. Trying not to add any snacks or extras to meals today to see what happens with sugar.
There are tons of books for diabetics. It all comes down to count carbs, exercise, drink water…. And take meds.
Not moving much July, August and 1 week in September really did me in… Now getting up and moving is harder. I’ve been trying to get to the chiro since tuesday.
My weight is the biggest issue. If I can drop weight I can control it better.
There are tons of online resources that will help me get to next level once I get basic habits back in place. My brain just isn’t absorbing anything new right now. By taking grocery shopping and cooking out of it I have more energy to do yoga, and I won’t accidentally mess up carb counts because I feel like poop.
I hope.
Tea has l-theanine which seems to have a neutralizing effect… for me anyway.
You’re smart! You can make progress on your own or with the right group.
Thurs 9-22-22:
y I did the last couple of days is working. My body battery is up to 75 and I got more REM sleep... still not enough but better. Not sure if I should still go to the chiro today, but doing it anyway. It will knock out yoga today, I think.
I think I will set paperwork back up in dad's room so I can sort itd by
Trying to cut out the snacking today. Breakfast was 1/8 cup coffee in almond milk, tofu scramble, soyrizo, cheese, avocado, zuchini.
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
I could take a Lyft but I have errands to do on the way back.
11:30 down to 217, stopping and drinking water.
It could also have been the IR meds in addition to the coffee.
5pm. Ate f75 meal. Followed it with 1 serving of chocolate clusters. Never buying these again.
I swear I can feel my arteries harden and fat cells expand as I lie here. Ugh.
I’m so fat.
Wed 9-21-22 10:40am
Slept 10.5 hours. REM and Body Battery came up a little. With the shorter day, I switched to IR adhd meds and they aren't enough... but I've eaten and now I am waiting for yoga at 12pm. It feels weird to skip paperwork to save energy for yoga, but I need to get my sugar down to be able to do anything. I don't know what else to do to break the cycle and get myself back up.
Maybe it's just the menu this week but Factor meals have changed. They are basically a hunk of meat, cauli rice, an uncomfortably large amount of cream cheese, more cheese on top and some flavoring.
Also the cheesecake isn't good anymore.
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
I seriously need some decent spotify playlists for the classes. Without mirror neurons firing from other people around me, I don’t have the inner strength to do it all the way through. I need a playlist to help me keep going.
Taking a break. I have a chiro appt but I can’t get it together to go.
Tackling dry erase calendar… I am as far as wiping it off
they are constantly showing adds on my facebook.
I didn’t wear myself out getting groceries and trying to cook… I’m able to use what little energy I have for yoga and the chiro today.
I agree that it's too bad that the meals aren't what they used to be, but like you said, maybe it's just this week.
What does it feel like when your sugar levels are high? Physically, I mean.
Getting on top of it.
With the meals… I think I am so exhausted that I don’t have the bandwidth to cook and do yoga… possibly also I am eating too many vegetables. I’m at the end of groceries and yesterday even if I’d had them delivered I would have ended up eating a pint of keto ice cream and a whole quest pizza because after putting them away I’d have been in comfort food mode.
Tues 9-20-22
Ate too many snacks yesterday because I was tired. Sugar is too high. I'm sure I gained weight. REM is also still too low... but better than yesterday. To my skipped 5pm yoga class last night I can add no showing for a 6:30am class this morning. Regrouping with a 30 min session at 9am. Even though I cleared the floor before bed last night, woke up at 5, and took meds on time, I couldn't get my head around vacuuming and setting up the mat first thing without tea and food first. So lesson here is go through the whole setup at night before bed for early AM yoga.
Reading on Reddit that soy everyday can mess with your hormones. Maybe my tofu scrables and veggie burgers are messing with my sleep quality?
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
7:30 tofu, soyrizo, spinach, cheese, avocado, salsa, tea, almondmilk.
Moved chiro appointment to tomorrow because I’m just too PMS to move. Cat agreed that was a good idea.
I loved reading that your caregroup ladies want to join you for yoga. Very hopeful!
And now, I will continue to show up for meetings to keep supporting others.
Mon 9-19-22 3:40am:
No log from yesterday. Everything was sore after yoga. Mostly across my shoulders and neck. I am really short on REM so I gave myself a day of bedrest and zoning out. I got a conversation with a wife of one of my dad's friends out of the way. It was more emotional than I was expecting. I'm a mess.
I then ate my emotions in the form of a cheeseownie. A block of cream cheese done up as cheesecake batter and dumped into a tray of brownie mix. No regrets.
Slept early but tons of nightmares in fragments. Mostly guilt at cremating my parents. Woke up at 2:30am unable to get back to sleep.
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
Caught that Emergen-c has 8 carbs per packet in it’s 35 calories. My 2 packet a night habit could be driving up my sugar,
i'm so tired too...not enough REM.
I think a cheeseownie is a great way to eat emotions. I mean, if we're going to go that route, at least make it yummy, right? It's been forever since I've had cheesecake.
I'm glad to hear that you gave yourself a day of rest & zoning out.
Sat 9-17-22 7am:
Tweaked my neck last night with headphones in bed. I know better. Tossed and turned all night but I got sleep. I think a chiro package is in my future, multiple visits per week. Maybe it will fix my blood pressure, blood sugar, and REM.
Today I heard my alarms. How did I not yesterday?
Yoga in the park today with the ladies from the support group. 2-3 years ago I made myself a yoga in the park kit with enough gear for 2 people and now I get to use it. Bringing the life boards may be overkill.
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
Have fun at yoga in the park!!!
I came home and ate my meal prep from yesterday, cauliflower and turkey sausage.
Was feeling pretty good until I had a talk with my aunt. No matter how much I am doing, she can come up with 20 more things I should be doing. Still, I am glad she still calls me even though dad has passed.
Tonight I will splurge and have a hamburger salad. Basically a salad with a burger in it.
nice you got your hair done yesterday. I plan to dye mine today!
stay fierce!
Fri 9-16-22 8:15 am
I'm trying so hard I swear... but I slept through all my alarms for a marathon 10 hours, had several good dreams, then woke up to not only not enough REM, but I slept through my fasting lab appointment. Ugh! Just UGH!!!! Vicious cycle I can't break.
At least I got a haircut yesterday. I finally cut out all the old bad dye. I just need to do a coconut oil mask and it will lif the colored conditioner... and I'll be blondish again. After a lot of sunlight.
Skipped blood pressure meds today. I need REM.
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
1:40 Heard gunshots next door. Called it in. Nothing on Nextdoor.
Took a shower.
3pm - Finally feeling awake enough to do something and the day is almost over.
Thurs 9-15-22 7am
After yesterday's bed rest and nsp, plus sleep, I am in much better shape to take on the challenges in front of me. My body battery went from empty to almost full and it's a lot higher than it has been in a while.
With double portions at all meals I was able to avoid snacking last night and sugar was lower.
Not enough REM though... and what I did get was all nightmares. This one was of me taking my dad out with a caregiver, trying to drive with him in the car, he decided to drive instead, and we ended up getting carjacked. The last nightmare was that people had decided to move into the house and we couldn't get them to leave.
Still, I can do today.
Progress as of today: 73.6 lbs lost so far, only 83.4 lbs to go!
Ate a snack 2 sting cheeses which will not help but I was hungry.
11 am coworking started.
1. Ate a double lunch to avoid snacking. Rearranged my freezer and discovered the majority of it is stuff I can’t have because it will spike my sugar. Mostly ziploc bags of peas, carrots, rice, beans, etc. I do have 1 bag of spinach, salmon burgers, and a million bags of turkey pepperoni with 2 slices left, lol. If I had realized that, my grocery run would have been massive. I think I can get by till next week on what I did buy.
That's so funny about the turkey pepperoni bags -- sounds a LOT like my family.
I suspect if you look at your sleep window it moves around by more than half an hour a day which will also screw with your sleep quality. A consistent 2 hour wind down and bedtime is the most stabilizing thing you can do for sleep quality.
Too much turkey pepperoni is a good problem to have!!!
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Inch by inch…
Inch by inch…
7:30 ate an f75 meal. Then set up my bike to ride 20 min. Need to find my padded cycling shorts. I lasted 2.
12pm Home from park yoga. This time it was by the beach. I have showered and eaten. I should get up and do fitboard or bicycle for 10 minutes, but I need a little time, water, and pants. This park was full sun and I feel whooped. It needs to be an hour earlier… but I can live with this. I was a little stronger today than yesterday.
Thought more about yoga instruction… the problem is that if I wanted to do it for people at my fitness level I’d need to know all the modifications and adjustments… which would be super advanced. Which to get super advanced, you would need to do a lot of training.
Between 12 and 5pm I ate 4 servings of chocolate clusters 2(?) more cheese sticks, turkey, water with 2 true lemon flavor packets, 5 raw almonds, another Factor75 meal and an entire bag of Dang coconut chips. All low carb but I’m going to pay for it all anyway with high sugar. Also forgot to take glipizide before dinner.
6pm… ok, trend analysis is my crazy OCD habit (and also what I did for a living) but I think I cracked my blood sugar problem. On one 20mg Enalapril, no caffeine, full hydration in the 90% range, daily yoga, stable bedtime and consistent timing on meals…
Looking at my blood sugar rise after the Dang coconut chips and the factor 75 meals… all meals where there are no processed carbs (like keto bread, tortillas, crackers, spaghetti or tomato sauce) I will rise 5 points for every non-fiber carb eaten. By comparison I rise 10-15 points for every processed carb eaten, regardless of fiber content (shiritaki noodles, lupini bean pasta, monkfruit). Overlying it is a natural arc that is highest overnight and lowest at lunch…i think.
Oops both examples are processed carbs. Unprocessed carbs would be zucchini, almonds, cauliflower.
10:15pm. In bed for an hour and change. Can’t sleep. Same problem as yesterday… too big a day. Worn out. Too tired to sleep. Trying not to snack but it is hard.
Jacky82020 on 09/25/2022:
A Turkey sandwich shouldn’t be so bad, guess it would all depend on the bread & whatever else. I’m going back out to Aldi’s soon to buy that keto bread Donkey mentioned.
What home A1C test do you use?
CVS
Donkey on 09/25/2022:
I guess I'm lucky that my butt fits my bike seat alright. I have to have a throw-pillow behind me, though, to support my back. I catch myself slouching, where my hips start moving forward. Left unchecked, I suppose I would end up horizontal on the bike.
I just haven’t done a bike ride in so long, I need to get used to it again. “Seasoning”
SomeFineDay on 09/25/2022:
Park yoga! That sounds like so much fun!
It was! Especially because a friend came with.
SomeFineDayToo on 09/25/2022:
Do you have a treadmill? We bought one from some people who had to move. It was a good buy at a hundred. We have it by the livingroom big TV.
I was thinking about one today. It might be worth a shot to get a used one when I move.
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