Up on time at 6 after going to bed at midnight thanks to help from my dad. I am showered, haired and makeuped and at school to do homework in the hall before class. I have a packed cooler and caught myself veering away from getting here early to get take out breakfast as a form of procrastination.
Bracing for myself for the nightmare that is this school and the people running it.
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
Trying to get homework done and I need to get this off my chest so I can focus... and stop eating corn tortillas with cheese. I've had 6 tortillas and 3/4 cups of cheese. My dog had 2 tortillas and 1/4 cup of cheese.
So at the lunch with my parents and my dad's old friends... after he hobbled his enormous bulk to the bathroom they asked... isn't there anything that can be done for him? My dad looks terrible. Both my parents do. And my heart just aches to think about it... Because you really never could do anything for my dad. He was determined to sleep in the chair and never go to bed on time. He hated vegetables and salads and refused to eat anything remotely healthy. He stayed away from therapists and lifestyle coaches like the plague. He hated to sweat or be uncomfortable in any way. Growing up his mom ruled all his habits with an iron fist and he hated to be controlled in any way. He just wanted to sit in front of the tv and the computer and not be bothered and eat whatever he wanted... and not have any consequences... except that it doesn't work that way.
And I think ADHD is a component. Hereditary. I couldn't get my personal habits under control until I started medication. All the millions of habits that go into getting to bed on time and stocking healthy food and structuring my day.
My mom talked about how they had gone on a medical weight loss program and he lost 60lbs and she lost 30 and then they gained it back. I said fudamentally you have to want to be healthy and feel better to sacrifice the treats and go for a walk. He doesn't want to.
Isn't it horrible to think that your father or your brother or your kid doesn't want to be healthy? It's like watching a car accident slowly happening everyday and you can't turn it around. Suicide by fork.
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
And I can also imagine that this must have been (and might continue to be) a very frustrating time for you. It's so hard to watch "death by fork"... I agree with Bear that it REALLY has to come from the person himself, though. And I don't know how one achieves that. For my husband, he needed/wanted hip replacement surgery, and the doctor said he wouldn't do it unless he lost 70 pounds.
Since surgery, though, my husband has not been able to lose any more and has actually gained back maybe 10 of those pounds. If he could just lose 25 more pounds... And sometimes he hops back on the diet-wagon, but it's not consistent.
I find though that if it doesn't come from within the person, then success is either limited, temporary, or elusive. Even from my own experience!
Crunched my calories and discovered that cronometer has been padding my calories burned from Fitbit by about 300 calories... so I have been looking at Cronometer thinking I am at a deficit and should burn a pound this week and break my plateau... and UGH! I'm not. Because I have been eating almost exactly or a little more than what Fitbit says and weigh about what I should weigh based on the calories I ate. If anything it's a miracle I don't weigh MORE than I do right now. UGH. All this struggle and nutritionist assistance and I'm sabotaged by the tool I paid money for. Sent an email to their tech support but BUMMER.
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
How do you know that Fitbit isn't wrong? Mine is not the most accurate when it comes to a lot of measures, but I still love it because it does tell me, relative to others and to other days, how I'm doing.
Hugs to all.
Up early, day 4. Alarm was set for 5 but I was up at 6, Fitbit says I took a long time to fall asleep last night and was up for a bit... But I got 7 hours and was up on time so Yay me. Plan is to do chores and dog walk till Costco opens at 10 then be first through the doors to get my prescription. I'm planning on checking out a Boba place by there to do homework... ALL DAY.
Except what I really want is a nap. Everything hurts. All I did was drive 3 hours yesterday. Neck is killing me. Maybe I'll use a hotwater bottle for a bit before I get started. I thought about it last night but was too tired to get out of bed.
It was nice to eat the costco rotisserie chickens at the table last night as a meal instead of picking at it until everyone had eaten and putting it away at midnight. Much more human and my portion control was better.
---
Chores ran over to 11AM. At least I made progress on sorting things out. Oi. Time management.
---
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
Totally not a fan of long drives either!
The costco chickens are great!!!!!!!! My sister buys organic chickens (not even cooked!) for $20!!!!!!!!!!
Survived the meeting with the EDD and the school. I lucked out and the other student showed and backed me up. The case manager was very helpful and supportive. The owner of the school was a loud mouthed jerk who kept talking over me and trying to get me to lose my cool. I just kept hammering away and eventually we came to an agreement that the instructor would provide a minimum list of competencies and portfolio content for myself and the other student to demonstrate by the end of class, since he taught almost nothing on the syllabus. It's all I wanted... a list of what work I actually needed to complete, a plan for when classes would be held, and what topics I actually needed to learn.
Argh.
Went to bed at 7 last night... Well... Stayed up looking at shoes online till 9. Fitbt says I slept 10 hours. Feels like it. I must have been super, super stressed.
Found a really cute pair of rubber shoes shaped to look like vans in pink from Native shoes... which are nicer than crocs because they protect your toes and your heels. A little heavy for backpacking, but good for camping and day hikes.
Another day where I got up early and walked my dog to the park. 3 in a row!!!! Build on success.
I have a lot of homework but the big priority for the day is to take my dad to see friends i town and have some lunch.
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
Ooo, your shoes sound so cool! I do love my Crocs but I understand wanting/needing more protection. Crocs definitely do not offer much in that, especially the classic style, which leaves the heel unprotected.
I hope lunch was a success! Keep on doin' yer homework - get 'er done! ;-)
Miracle of miracles I was up at 5:30am, took meds and a shower, then washed dishes till my meds kicked in and I made coffee, ate oatmeal, then walked my dog to the park. Fitbit says it only took 30 min for me to get to sleep last night. Also my sleep cycle is more effective... Slept for 7h and was only awake for 30min. Normally I sleep for 9h to get 7.
8am time to do homework
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
Went to a nutrition class today on counting carbs and balancing with protein. Interesting tidbit... vingegar in your water before you eat can reduce your carb absorption by 20%.
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
for me it would be overboard! good tip.
Not sure where yesterday went, but I went to bed on time for once and got up on time at 6 today . I just wanted to put that here so that I can mark the momentous occasion of incrementally getting my **** together... because we must celebrate our successes.
Grrr get after it!
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
Not sure where today went. I slept in. Woke up at 12... made up for the nights of 4h sleep this week. I made some chili which was complicated the first time through the recipe. I need to find more 1 pot meals.
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
chilli is a fantastic 1 pot meal! do you had any meat? turkey? why was the recipe difficult???
sleeping in helps the body so much....i did that yesterday. love waking up without an alarm!
Chili was white bean, chicken thighs, poblano peppers and onions.
Recipe was difficult because it wasn't written in order of operations to be a one pot meal. It should have said roast the poblanos first, then transfer to stovetop to toast the cumin in salt, then brown the chicken, then acc onion, then add peeled seeded chopped poblanos. Instead it had you brown the chicken, then roast the poblanos, then toast the cumin. Ah the wonders of recipe blogs.
OMG. no idea how I got all my homework done by start of class, but I did. Minor miracle. Ate offtrack today but that can't be helped. Stress and exhaustion. After class I treated myself to a walk around the mall to get some extra steps in... I tried on some stuff at Hand M and felt a little "mutton dressed as lamb". Or maybe I need more makeup. Still shocked to be a size L.
Progress as of today: 92.7 lbs lost so far, only 18.3 lbs to go!
[ Previous Page 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 Next Page ]
Good luck at class!!!!!
bearcountrygg on 06/23/2018:
Have a good one.
graindart on 06/23/2018:
I don't envy anyone taking classes anymore. My only class time stuff is yearly continuing education stuff and I have a hard time just sitting still for those couple days per year. My attention span is fairly small nowadays. I rarely even like watching movies because I lose interest around the 45 minute mark.
I actually love classes. I like feeling my brain actually working. If I had a million dollars I'd go take math classes around the world and tutor for free.
Donkey on 06/24/2018:
I was about your age when I went back to school to reinvent myself (after hitting rock bottom). I loved being in class, but I have to admit that the summer sessions were really rough -- cramming a 16 week course into an online 8 week timeframe. Had to stay on top - or a little ahead, even - of the syllabus. Have 2 school-aged kids to tend to made it a little more challenging, too.
Like Gains, I too find myself lacking attention, which is why movies don't do much for me any more. I have a hard enough time getting through a Reader's Digest. I am seldom able to finish books (non-fiction; although I admit that could be due to the subject matter I've chosen). Still, I think it would be wonderful to take a algebra class or something and start building up my math skills again - just for the heck of it!