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view happy-1 bio page
happy-1 - Tuesday Mar 12, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar.)
Weight: 216.3

4:30am... zero sleep and I have to drive my mom to the doctor today. Thank goodness for Lyft. Just can't sleep because I have so many things to do and so little time... and the workload of two ill parents and a senior dog is a firehose. 

But got a lot of stuff done today. I worked hard. Just miles to go and no sleep.

I love that Archer and Pam hook up and she rocks his world. 

Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 03/12/2019:
what happened with your parents, happy?

senior dog!!!

happy-1 on 03/12/2019:
They are a little under the weather and it is going to be a rough ride.

happy-1 on 03/12/2019:
Cancer and congestive heart failure

legcramps on 03/12/2019:
Hope you get some rest soon!

happy-1 on 03/12/2019:
Hugs! Gotta sleep sometime!

A man who gets the reputation of rising at dawn can sleep to noon. - Winston Churchill

happy-1 - Monday Mar 11, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar.)
Weight: 216.3

Self-care night. Parents are stable and both at home resting. They have each other for the buddy system. I took a day off and started tonight with a round of self-care... A shower, brow shaping, hand wash of critical clothes, hot bowl of wor wonton soup, and some old episodes of Archer. I might hold it together. Hot kickboxing instructor says he misses me and looks forward to Disneyland on Friday. With luck we will get to go. Such an awesome guy and he's a total oasis in all of this.

Hugs all. I've missed you. As Cheryl says in Archer S3:12 "The words for crisis and opportunity in Chinese are the same." But mine is not detachable.

Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 03/12/2019:
i'm so glad to hear that things are settling down on your end!

Hot Wonton Soup sounds AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!! So does Archer!

Let us know if you end up going to Disney! That's always fun! I think i shall go to Disney in Paris!?

Take Care, Happy!

happy-1 - Wednesday Mar 06, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar.)
Weight: 216.3

225.0 this morning. Up 9lbs. How do you get control of your weight during a family crisis?

Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 03/07/2019:
HELLO HAPPY! welcome back :)

What is happening ? I am sorry to here things are stressful for you :(

I'd have to say the only way is to set your boundaries. You cannot always be in crisis mode even though it's a crisis.

my mom just had a terrible injury and i am only visiting once a week and on the weekends...not every night. that's my only advice.

My dad has been seeing her constantly, so i am sure he's very streessed out by now since it's already been almost 2 weeks of her in hospital / rehab.

happy-1 on 03/11/2019:
Hugs. Ty for the perspective. You are a good daughter!

Donkey on 03/07/2019:
Glad to hear from you!!! But I'm so sorry it's not under better circumstances. I wish I had an answer for you. I can tell you that eating during a crisis solves NOTHING except to make you feel like CRAP. How do I know this? Done this many, many times...

I hope you are OK. I hope your mom is doing OK; she was having some health issues at last update. Hope your dad is OK, as well...

happy-1 on 03/11/2019:
They are both doing alternate er/hospital stays. It's all pretty intense.

happy-1 - Thursday Feb 07, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar/cholesterol.)
Weight: 216.3


Drinking from the firehose, but maintaining.  

Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 02/07/2019:
keep on, happy! at least you don't have this cold weather to deal with! i cannot wait for this cold to be over! seems i had to skip my workouts all this work week! :(

Maria7 on 02/09/2019:
Happy for you on maintaining.

happy-1 - Friday Feb 01, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar/cholesterol.)
Weight: 216.3

So incredibly tired. I was supposed to get a down day / no adhd meds today but my dad ran out of meds... which meant that I had to take the smaller XR stuff just to get it together to get out and get them. I'm actually hoping everything will get easier now that a social worker through the hospital is involved. I've unknowingly been a caretaker for an undiagosed cancer patient for 4 years... gee no wonder I'm always 2 minutes from a freak out and total exhaustion.

Wins today were getting the kitchen back to "cookable", getting the smoothie stuff together to get 300 or so calories into mom (she got almost 1000 in today), getting a decent meal into my dad... chicken and sweet potato for dinner.

My big plan is to try to get up at 5:30 tomorrow so I can be up an out and thru my day before they start asking for things. It will make a difference I am sure.

Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 02/01/2019:
Who has the cancer? your father? i'm sorry...i missed you writing about this earlier.

5:30am is a nice, early wakeup anywhere in the world! :) i'm sure it'll help you to get ready and start out with productivity first thing in the morning.

horn_of_plenty on 02/01/2019:
you can make your own 4 agreements keychain...or something similar....and keep it with you!!!!!! maybe just take a photo or use the lines as your phone background? or on the monitor of your computer. :) i might actually do this, at work. yeah, 4 agreements i think is my new monitor background at work :)

legcramps on 02/01/2019:
Your Mom has cancer? I'm so sorry to hear this, hugs.

Donkey on 02/02/2019:
I hope the social worker helps. They can be an invaluable resource. (((hugs)))

happy-1 - Thursday Jan 31, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar/cholesterol.)
Weight: 216.3

222.3... In the right direction.

Last several days have been about survival mode. I have literally done everything I physically could and have not stopped moving from when my eyes open in the morning till I lay down at night.

I couldn't tell you what I ate... Except that this morning I threw out half a bag of cheap $1 cookies because I couldn't stop eating them. I thought that they'd be good enough to just have a couple with coffee, but they were terrible AND I couldn't stop eating them. But they would make me fat, sick, and nearly dead... so out they went. 

I also ate a single slice peanut butter and jelly sandwich, a lean cuisine, and an orange... some chicken and some hummus. Mom kept down some mashed potatoes and gingerale pretty well. That's hopeful... My dog also ate a lot. My dad isn't feeling well at all. He barely ate.

So tired. I lost my car keys yesterday and couldn't find them to save my life all day long. I left them on the windshield yesterday. I must have looked at them 20x and not seen them.

On a brighter note. I think I found my boots... For under $80 and size 16" calf which means just enough space to go over jeans. It's an online order from Nordstrom Rack, but the Born brand ones I tried on seemed good quality and with any luck, they won't have cheaped out on the heel cups... And I actually get them. I went through checkout and then they weren't listed anymore on the site! Like an apparition that might have disappeared as quickly as they came.

And not a moment too soon, because my current boots have broken shanks on both soles and aren't worth repairing. Fingers crossed.

Order Item Product Image

I need to find a Valentine's Day treat for my guy... Not sure what to get him... He's got a great signature fragrance, already has jewelry, likes fine tobacco (yuck)... But somehow does not have a swimsuit or anything for fun and adventures... I got him a windbreaker for Christmas... Maybe board shorts in a tall size?


Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 01/31/2019:
I will write more, but, isn't it too warm by you to want to invest in any more boots!?!?

happy-1 on 02/01/2019:
Everyone needs 1 pair of boots and I am super self conscious about my calves because I have a bunch of big red scars on them from spider bites a few years ago that haven't faded yet. It was bad... So I basically wear them with dresses all year long and over jeans in the winter.

horn_of_plenty on 01/31/2019:
it's sad that people actually make "bad" cookies..i have had some myself, too!

i hope your dad feels better soon.

lastly, i'm glad you found your keys...eventually you did :)

happy-1 on 02/01/2019:
Thanks. I'm buying new batteries for my key fob tracker tonight for sure.

horn_of_plenty on 02/01/2019:
GREAT idea! a tracker is always so helpful!

happy-1 - Saturday Jan 26, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar/cholesterol.)
Weight: 216.3

223.9 today. I totally expected it to be higher considering how much I have been eating. This is manageable. I can get on top of this.

As in the 4 Agreements, I did my best today. All I humanly could. I just need to get up and do the same tomorrow.

My splurges today were some $1 bullet journal stencils, a new frying pan, plunger, dog deodorant, and some cookies for my dad.

The day planner worked out well.  I need to print out some stuff to make it work but it’s exactly the right shape and weight. 

Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 01/27/2019:
I enjoyed the 4 agreements too...although i always forget what they are even though you reminded me once before :)

I'd never heard of dog deodorant!

Nice job getting back into the swing of things, weight on bar, managing things in your life! WELL DONE!

happy-1 on 01/31/2019:
I forget too. I thought about getting a keychain, but they don't make them!

Donkey on 01/27/2019:
Dog deodorant - LOL!

I'm glad you weighed in, even if maybe it wasn't quite the number you had hoped for - although it sounds like you're not displeased, as it could have been worse. IDK I think accountability to oneself is important in life - not just weight-loss, but especially in weight loss.

I browse these keto support groups on Facebook, and the ones that really get me are the people who start talking about "Is it OK to cheat?" WT*???

happy-1 on 01/27/2019:
Lol. She’s getting a little stinky in her old age and mom’s nose is super sensitive. I wanted to give her something safe to spray my dog with so she doesn’t spray her with febreeze

happy-1 - Friday Jan 25, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar/cholesterol.)
Weight: 216.3

Having an "I need to fix my life" shopping control moment. Like buying tools/things will give me new superpowers so that I can be more effective and get closer to my goals... LOL.

Here is what I should buy to support my fitness/self care push:

  • Supplements
  • Yoga classes
  • Before/after pic app

Here are the items burning a hole in my brain:

  • Backpack for running around with
  • Black boots
  • Black belt bag
  • Bee necklace
  • Summer sandals
  • Shorts

Shake it off! At least I ate oatmeal and 2 cups of broccoli today.


Took mom for a haircut, dinner, and craft store run. Everyone needed the morale boost.


Update: I bought my supplements and a day planner today. I am putting out my clothes, oatmeal and coffee for tomorrow... One foot in front of the other. I can pull myself together. I know I can.

Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

Donkey on 01/25/2019:
Fiber is your friend :)

If weight loss was something you could study for, I'd be so thin, the numbers on the scale would be negative.

happy-1 on 01/26/2019:
Ha... Right????

happy-1 on 01/26/2019:
At least I only spent $ on supplements and things I legitimately needed today... Although I bought a zipper repair kit that was $16.73!!! For some zipper parts? OMG.

Donkey on 01/26/2019:
Reading this again, I kind of wish I could have afforded to "buy" my weight loss with some kind of surgery. I'll talk about this more in my own diary, but just sayin'...

happy-1 on 01/26/2019:
noooooooo... it’s a miserable experience and you never really feel good ever again

Horn_of_plenty on 01/26/2019:
yum to oatmeal and coffee...!

i am also "fixing my life today!" ...getting a much needed new cell phone bc my current one constantly freezes on me and cannot even update anymore! so, i'll be getting a purchase plan for financing a new phone today!!! woohoo!

happy-1 on 01/31/2019:
Hugs. Look for refurbished ones. Cheaper overall.

happy-1 - Tuesday Jan 22, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar/cholesterol.)
Weight: 216.3

Stayed mostly on plan yesterday but also was out with my guy. Easy to be on track with him so far. He will eat pretty much anything put in front of him, including kale. A giant walking appetite.

At lunch I took him to my favorite burger joint. He was kind of so so about the burger... he didn’t like the bun. I was astounded that he thought the burger was only ok... it is awesome. But then again, I get the lettuce wrap. Well not lately... I’m working on my cholesterol. I had a chicken spinach salad. And a bunch of his sweet potato fries. The rest of the day we had stuff out of my cooler. I had packed hummus, a feta/olive deli salad (small splurge), carrots, oranges, peaches, almonds, and pita chips. I just filled my lunch bag at Aldi’s and stuck it in the fridge the night before. I haven’t been rigorous about meal prepping... Too exhausted. I was still pretty surprised that he polished off the deli salad, hummus, and chips in one sitting. Walking appetite. I also had thrown in my jetboil and camping mess for making fresh coffee at the archery range. He was underwhelmed. I kind of expected more praise for my picnic prowess to be honest.

B: (4am, up too early) 2 eggs, jack cheese, olive oil, uncured sausage, leftover blueberry protein pancake, coffee, half n half
S: Another leftover protein pancake
L: Chicken spinach salad
S: Hummus, pita chips, carrots, peach, some feta/ olive salad
Tons of water

Today was a little harder to stay on plan. Too many processed foods and simple carbs.

It was a doctor day and I was driving. I woke up at the same time my parents did which meant no time for me to get myself in order before the Circus started. I just grabbed a PBJ and coffee... which was super processed with a lot of added sugar. I had packed a cooler with seltzer, oranges, hummus and carrots, plus I had some granola bars in my bag for my parents... So I had one of the trail mix bars. Somewhat unprocessed but it had rice syrup for added sugar. Lunch was more on plan because I refused to stop at the hospital snack bar or for fast food on the way back. Not exactly a hostage situation, but close. I had already set up dinner and made that up... Chicken breasts, smaller sweet potatoes, and spinach. They ate that without complaint, mostly to make me happy. Then I got a small break before it was time to take them grocery shopping. I realized I could make dinner easier for myself by boiling water, then turning off the heat to let the noodles absorb water while we were out. When I got home, I just had to dump extra water, mix with casserole stuff and bake. The egg noodles definitely are not on plan... but this is a family favorite comfort food... and I think we definitely needed the comfort. Mom bought ice cream bars at the store and I had ONE. All the added, processed sugar was definitely not on plan. Then when I made up the rest of the casserole, I ended up with a late night serving. I think the Lunesta lowers my resistance to snacking even if it helps me sleep.

B: PBJ on Dave's White Bread
S: Trail mix bar
L: Chicken, sweet potato, ton of spinach, butter, bbq sauce
S: Orange
D: Noodle/cottage cheese casserole, ton of broccoli, salt, pepper, seltzer
S: Klondike ice cream bar
S: Extra serving of casserole, then a 1/2 PBJ. bad bad.
Not enough water.

Grocery store we went to was weird on pricing and on inventory. Food4Less? Should be called Packaged Poison for Less. They had super high prices on broccoli and spinach, but market prices on meat/fruit, then lower prices on anything packaged. But not great for a diet high in fruits and veggies... If I ate all the veggies that are on my plan I would need about 140 cups of spinach, kale, and broccoli a week to make enough for me and my mom. I can't even process how many bags I would need to buy... Or how to store them without the fridge ruining them... If you fill it it freezes the eggs and produce. I was freezing water bottles and then tossing the broccoli and spinach in a cooler and cycling out the water bottles every day but it got to be too much work and waste if I forgot to do it for a day. UGH. I wish I bought a second fridge when I moved in.

Anyway, super frustrated with myself for not buying greens when we were at the store. I did at least buy popcorn kernels... not more processed microwave popcorn... a bunch of fruit... some lara bars...

UGH. I guess it is another round of groceries at Costco tomorrow when I pick up my prescriptions. Bless my guy for getting a Costco cash card for me so I can get stuff there while I wait for another membership deal. Broccoli, spinach, vanilla orgain protein powder. Why does it feel so weird to buy green veggies in bulk, even though I know I will eat them, and buying them in bulk makes mee feel more like eating them? It goes against how my parents buy and eat... 50 Lean Cuisines and maybe a tomato. My cart is very different since I started working with the nutritionist.

Did my best today for mom at the doctor’s. She says she'd like to try smoothies... This is my pick to try for tomorrow: https://www.halfbakedharvest.com/2-minute-green-smoothie/

Guess I will stock up on frozen fruit too... that's a smoothie staple. I haven't done that because I don't want to waste a whole serving of fruit in a blender... no chance to chew anything.

Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

graindart on 01/23/2019:
Love my cancer-causing processed microwave popcorn with the fake yellow dye, fake butter flavor, and tons of sodium!

I hear you on the fresh produce storage in the fridge. To get a decent price, I need to buy bulk sizes. But it's too easy for something to get ruined (freezing, too much water, too dried out, etc).

Good to see you posting again.

happy-1 on 01/23/2019:
Hugs! Good to be posting again. Clears the cobwebs from my brain to make me effective.

horn_of_plenty on 01/23/2019:
even though you weren't rigorous about the food planning, you found some easy to pack snacks so that's great!

good idea to make a noodle casserole using cottage cheese! yum!!!!!!!!!

yum to smoothies! it's good to make them with the ice so that it takes up some of the volume but no calories :)

happy-1 on 01/23/2019:
yeah I won’t call it kugel... it would be an insult... but my dad didn’t notice the difference

Donkey on 01/23/2019:
I'm quite impressed with your picnic skills :) So glad you're posting again!

happy-1 on 01/26/2019:
Hugs! I am glad I am posting again too. It kept me on track financially and dietary... although I caved tonight and had granola bars from my stash for my parents.

happy-1 - Wednesday Jan 16, 2019
(Slow Carb + Yoga. Track fasting sugar/cholesterol.)
Weight: 216.3

 I've been absent and not commenting... I apologize. 

Getting back on track for January after some hard news about my mom's health. It makes getting myself into the best shape possible important than ever. I'll get into it later... Right now it is oxygen mask on myself first. Logging here to clarify my habits and goals for 2019... It helps to "think out loud" (and thank you for being here for me to come back to).

In 2018, I crossed the 100lb loss mark... But it was the outcome of health and lifestyle changes that are much more beneficial. I opened myself up to meditation and spirituality, gave up my fear of doctors and made strides on my health, gave up anxiety and sadness and learned to focus on the "now", relieved terrible neck pain, made some new friends, and started a new relationship that fills a giant void I've been carrying with me. I started down the path to mastering ADHD. I became consistent with exercise and dog walks. I achieved a regular, consistent sleep pattern. I learned to plan and prepare healthier foods so that I can be healthier overall. I "gave up" a lot of comfort foods and emotional eating. I "unlearned" that I deserve a treat for _____. I actually deserve better than a treat. I deserve something that really makes me feel good.

Last week, I started making realistic to do lists for the day / next day and completing them. I am saving the post-its so I can frame them. I even have the frame.

I've come a million miles from where I started.

Health goals for 2019:

  1. Lower cholesterol by 11 points.
  2. Always know my fasting blood sugar for the day.
  3. Get to my goal weight of 165.
  4. Limit my intake of processed/packaged foods to less than 20% of my overall intake.
  5. Improve my gum health.
  6. Improve the rash on my hands and ankles for better skin health.
  7. Improve my adult onset acne and rosacea for better skin health.

 Let's all kick some ass this year.

Progress as of today: 100.7 lbs lost so far, only 56.3 lbs to go!

graindart on 01/16/2019:
Glad someone has a list and determination to work towards completing it.

Seems like my list lately is:

1. Don't screw up all the hard work you've completed by regressing back to your old ways.

happy-1 on 01/20/2019:
Ha! Right? I'll prep myself for the week and then start my next "graindart streak", lol.

Donkey on 01/16/2019:
Welcome back - good to hear from you again :) Great list of goals!

happy-1 on 01/20/2019:
Thank you! I've missed you guys.

horn_of_plenty on 01/17/2019:
Wow your goals are very specific and concrete ! I don't know my fasting blood sugar - you motivate me to maybe start delving into it!!

happy-1 on 01/20/2019:
Yeah, worth watching. I'm trying to make things specific and measurable so I don't feel like I am "losing ground"

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