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happy-1 - Saturday Dec 11, 2021
Weight: 243.0

 Friday 12-10-21 11pm

Long day. very tired. Took 2 rest days but I guess I needed a third. Went to the East West doc, who changed my blood pressure med to enalapril. I pick it up tomorrow.

Cpap did something. I got 2:45 REM last night... double quantity. Hope is a shiny penny. I was going to run on the way home but the high school track wasn't open to locals tonight. I came home and packed supplements. If I do it every night I will be caught up for a month.

Also I made dad dinner. Cod, spinach, sweet potato. I ate with him. He spent the whole meal complaining about my cooking. But I did it. If I just keep making the effort, maybe something will get better.

Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

Donkey on 12/11/2021:
Well, that is awesome to hear about the CPAP machine and getting more REM. That is amazing! And I'm very happy for you and this major victory!

The new blood pressure medicine sounds interesting. I hope it works better for you.

Dinner sounds delicious. Some folks are so deep in their own negativity that nothing else can emerge or emit. However, you do bring up an interesting point, that has made me really think about my own situation. (So this is not a reflection on you or your writings at all.) What if our efforts are for naught? That is to say, we put in an effort, but nothing gets better. Do we continue the effort? Do I separate the effort from the reward? Could the effort become the reward in itself?

Hope is a shiny penny -- that's for sure.

happy-1 on 12/11/2021:
I actually found a shiny penny heads up at the track yesterday and made a wish. I won’t jinx the wish and say what it was but it was towards my smart goals.

I think if we constantly make effort and nothing gets better, then we might need to stop making that effort… but with my dad I figure making the effort reduces guilt and will keep me from derailing when REM drops (although hopefully that will stop with the cpap).

Jacky82020 on 12/11/2021:
Glad the CPAP is working for you!

Sounds like a very nice meal. Too bad Dad wasn’t more appreciative.

happy-1 on 12/11/2021:
Dad would appreciate a Hometown Buffet trip, then refuse to go to the ER for worsening congestive heart failure, lol.

Jacky82020 on 12/11/2021:
That’s so sad, must be frustrating for you.

happy-1 on 12/11/2021:
I found all these letters from his mom and sisters begging him to take care of his health and including news clippings. Apparently his willful destruction of his health caused such a rift he refused to attend funerals, anniversaries, etc.

happy-1 on 12/11/2021:
I’m the last in the line of the battle.

happy-1 - Thursday Dec 09, 2021
Weight: 243.0

 Thursday 12-9-21 12pm: 

Home. Yesterday was hectic... I love seeing the Exish but it's so much work to be able to leave the house and prep for the health aide to be here... when he's cranky, it makes it feel like it's not worth the effort. It's not that he's so much effort (except that I shower, shave, do hair, wear makeup and real clothes)... it's that the house has to be clean and all the errands done so the aide doesn't run into any difficulties while they are here. I also had a dermatology appointment and two sets of errands to run for my dad this morning. What makes him cranky? Anything that isn't perfect, on point and sharp... I was tired and scatterbrained yesterday. So everything. It makes me want to say maybe we should see other people. Like someone who will give me a hug or a cup of coffee instead of snarling at me.

With sleep improving, I'm pretty sure this bone-deadening fatigue is the losartan. I stopped taking it for a week and I felt a lot better. My blood pressure rose so I started it again and now I'm tired enough to cry when anything is too hard again. On it till the 10th when I can ask the East West doc for a different prescription.

I need to pull it together and focus. I'm super hungry even though I have had enough calories. I just want to sleep and watch TV and hide from the world. I should probably do restorative yoga tonight but I am so tired I can't move. I should probably run tomorrow though. Taking yesterday and today as rest days that weren't restful... I dunno if that will move the green zone up a level.


Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

Donkey on 12/09/2021:
"I just want to sleep and hide from the world" - ME, for about 2 weeks straight.

happy-1 on 12/11/2021:
Me today for sure! You need it though...

Donkey on 12/09/2021:
Some relationships take a lot of work. At the end of the day, one has to decide if one has the time and energy to put into it OR if it's just too much work and time to say good-bye.

My 2 cents anyway...

happy-1 on 12/11/2021:
Or I'm just stressed and pulling away from people in general. He's the last person I see and talk to regularly. My link to the world.

happy-1 - Tuesday Dec 07, 2021
Weight: 243.0

Tuesday 12-7-21 6:25 am:

Step by step. Inch by inch. Pebble by pebble, I will move a mountain. Drop by drop I will carve a path.

The cpap setting adjustments and headband the respiratory therapist recommended yesterday helped.  This morning the screen showed green happy faces.


I don't understand why events per hour would only be 1. The cpap helped me get more REM.


I'm down 2lbs but up 30lbs overall since last year.

Some days I wonder if I will ever turn things around again.

Focus for today... Run. Pick up probiotics. Get paperwork and labs to Naturopath. Try the blood sugar support supplements I bought. Pack more supplements while I am functional. Get the heat repaired. Actually count my carbs today. Get through more of my paperwork.

So incredibly tempted to go to the keto bakery and bury myself in a giant chocolate cale.


Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 12/07/2021:
Nice the CPAC has improved your sleep. Yay! Sounds like you haven’t experienced much difficulty getting used to it? I have a few friends who never could & others who made easy adjustments.

happy-1 on 12/07/2021:
I think it's a case where all the tracking I do and looking forward to seeing numbers improve makes me willing to do whatever it takes. Like keeping the mask on even though it hurts my nose and skipping the keto bakery.

Jacky82020 on 12/07/2021:
Do you use it only when you sleep? I remember them telling this one friend to get used to it while she watched TV in the daytime. But she never could. She said it hurt her nose too. She may have also said it made obnoxious sounds & kept her awake. Not positive on that. It was a few years back. Does yours make noise?

Good 4 you 4 your perseverance!

Keto bakery! Yum! I have a keto cookbook with desserts to die for. All that butter & heavy cream!

I’d buy a keto cake if Walmart had them discounted in the bakery. I’m so cheep, cheep, cheep.

happy-1 on 12/09/2021:
I got uses to it so fast, I skipped the wearing it when I watch tv phase… I can sleep a full night with it and the chinstrap makes it easier. It just takes longer to fall asleep with it on so I’m going to bed an hour early with the TV on, watching while I fall asleep. It’s more like it reminds me I need to fall asleep now which of course creates anxiety that I won’t fall asleep, so it’s harder to fall asleep.

Keto cake is a diy thing unless there is a bakery near you.

Maria7 on 12/07/2021:
Don't give up. No matter what. Don't give up. Even if the numbers go up, don't give up. Eventually you'll get to where you want to be if you keep trying. I'm going through the same thing over here. I seem to think that because it is Christmas season, that I can have extra treats and not gain. Ha! Joke that behaviour is.

happy-1 on 12/11/2021:
Thank you for pointing out that I am mentally giving up. Slapping myself in the face and getting back out there.


Horn_of_plenty on 12/07/2021:
sounds like both you and innerP have corrected the issues you were having with cpap! wishing you success this week!

happy-1 on 12/11/2021:
Cpap is everything!!!

Donkey on 12/08/2021:
Regarding your graph, you've had a really tough year, and that's an understatement. My graph went up in 2020; this I know. I find it helpful though to look back and see where I've been so that I can plan on where I'm going. I had a good chuckle over my 2021 goals, posted in January.

Oh well, we gotta keep on trying. I'm hoping the CPAP is a game-changer for you. Maybe you're setting up for a fabulous 2022.

happy-1 on 12/11/2021:
THAT would be great!

happy-1 - Monday Dec 06, 2021
Weight: 243.0

Monday 12-6-21 7 pm: 

One step at a time. Inch by inch. Pebble by pebble.

  • Messed up my sugar more yesterday. Had a late night snack. Took glipizide last night. Fell asleep by 10:15 last night. 
  • 5:45am - Woke up. Had a glipizide and ate too early because I thought I could pull it together to do yoga if I did... but I didn't. I ended up working on the challenge to get it live so people can start signing up for it. 
  • 7:30 - Put it live, sent it to a couple of people to test signing up for it.
  • 9am - Therapy appointment. I was still pretty chipper.
  • 11am - Coworking and posting more challenge content. A bunch of calls from the CPAP company... If you send them a note saying that your mask doesn't fit and by the way would they like their missing $1,000 CPAP that mysteriously showed up at my house back, you get white glove VIP service. I have a feeling my response to the guy that called me is going to be used for employee training.
  • 2:30pm - Started plugging away at figuring out how to deal with the check engine light. Kind of proud of myself. I went to an auto parts store, borrowed their code reader, saw their report... called Pep Boys to see if they had the part... and saved myself $40 for a code reader and $100 and an entire day of sitting at Pep Boys only to find out they can't repair the valve and I need to go to the dealer... or a trusted referral. I deserve a cookie. Except it would be bad for my sugar.
  • 5pm - Made dad a burger. Hopefully it wasn't raw.
  • 6pm - Had another glipizide and ate a can of chili. 
  • 7pm - All my supplements (it looks like a vitamin store had an earthquake) are all over my bed because I need to pack them. I was going to watch tv and pack them, but I'm so tired I want to fall over. Bedtime is supposed to be 8:30.

Does the above look like it matches an 8 hour workday of a functional adult yet? Therapist says I sound massively better. I think it's because I started skipping my blood pressure meds last week. Just got desperate to not feel so awful.

I am having elaborate fantasies about giant slices of chocolate birthday cake and all-you-can-eat prime rib buffets.

Off to prep my keto hot breakfasts into mason jars and pack my endless bags of supplements. Tonight I incorporate more pills... blood sugar support from the naturopath. I can only imagine what would happen if a cop searched my purse. What are these? 

Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 12/07/2021:
You deserve at least 3 cookies for ingenuity.

Yes! To your last question, (2 thumbs up emojis here)

Jacky82020 on 12/07/2021:
Posted link for you.

horn_of_plenty on 12/07/2021:
lol i actually don't like eating too early either...messes up my eats / calories!

Donkey on 12/07/2021:
I think that sounds like a very productive day! YAY!!!!

bearcountrygg on 12/07/2021:
On Big Bang Theory, Penny just put a sticker over her check engine light...LOL

happy-1 on 12/07/2021:
HAH! That makes my anxiety just twist to even think about.

happy-1 - Sunday Dec 05, 2021
Weight: 243.0

Sunday 12/5/21 6:10am:

Yesterday was another win in the bucket. Just need to keep racking those up, 1 at a time. Pebble by pebble, inch by inch, I will move a mountain. 

  • I wrote more challenge content
  • I followed up on getting the heat fixed
  • I saw my friend
  • I limited myself to 3 meals, all on plan
  • I went to bed on time, took a while to fall asleep but I kept the CPAP on without it popping off all night somehow. Can't wait to see my sleep scores
  • I was up on time at 4 this morning. Picking up speed on waleup. 6am yoga is within my reach this week, I think
  • I did a couple of personal business tasks
  • I didn't do yoga, but I also didn't have a plan in place for it

Yesterday was not without setbacks.

My check engine light is on. Appointment on Tuesday. This is not in my wherlhouse and I don't have anyone to ask about it... Anxious. Supposed to see Exish this week. Inconvenient and he knows less about cars than I do. Why do I keep dating guys who don't know guy stuff?

My friend is in bad shape. She had a brain injury in college and hasn't ever recovered. She's living with a nephew who is moving and she doesn't know where to. She called me the other day to try and get me to move in with her. I have a feeling this will end badly and I will need to help for the sake of our moms who were really close. If I do, I probably need to call APS first... I dunno how I would pull off getting myself back up, getting my dad squared away, and also helping her without additional support. Even with additional support, it's probably dicey.


Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

Donkey on 12/05/2021:
Yes, that's a great day! YAY!!!!

That's a tough situation with your friend. I'm so sorry. I think you're being realistic that handling your dad and your friend would be too much. Boundaries. And you won't be able to help anyone if you yourself are falling apart, e.g. exhaustion (physical, mental, emotional).

And on top of all of that, car troubles. Like who needs THAT in their lives at any time? That actually sounds like the easiest problem to tackle, and that ain't no fun.

happy-1 on 12/05/2021:
Yeah but if I don’t help… no way I can look my mom in the eye when we meet up on the other side.

Donkey on 12/06/2021:
^Right, I agree, but that doesn't mean you have to undertake her care 100% alone.

horn_of_plenty on 12/06/2021:
maybe she can move in with you? unless that's a little too close for comfort.

legcramps on 12/06/2021:
I'm sorry about your friend, and I agree that there is likely something you can do to help her out and still be able to look Mom in the eye on the other side. Moving in though? You sure you wouldn't be moving from being caregiver for one to caregiver for two? Sounds like more than a full time job to me, and if that ain't your passion in life, then you are going to start to resent SOMEONE eventually.

If that's the way it needs to go, then at least set some boundaries for yourself, so that you're not giving all of yourself to someone else and not being able to keep up with your own stuff - and by that I mean taking care of yourself - which includes all the appointments, paying the bills, keeping things maintained, etc. and doing things that will lift your spirits too!

happy-1 - Saturday Dec 04, 2021
Weight: 243.0

Saturday, 12-4-21 8:30 am:

Yesterday was a success. I did a run on the fancy park track by Trader Joes. I ran an 18 minute pace. I only banked 25 hours recovery time and raised my VO2 max 1 point to 26. I'm starting to carve a notch into the mysterious 12 point drop from the Moderna nightmare.

Garmin also shows this mysterious coaching message I don't understand. I will have to research what peaking means.

And nothing hurts. I could totally run today, but I will do a restorative yoga class this afternoon instead. I feel more confident with the cpap to aid recovery. There isn't anxiety that if I do exertion today I will have a REM dropout tonight. Speaking of... the cpap helped raise my REM again last night. Even though it took me a LONG time to fall asleep last night with it on... my sleep was way more efficient.

And for the non-metric victories... Yesterday I got a lot of writing done on the challenge. I dug into the overview section which I have been resisting because it requires actual thought. It's not just a recitation of facts. Also, I did some grocery shopping and did two meals correctly. I changed my sheets and got bolster covers I made forever ago onto my yoga bolsters to keep the cat fur off and they look great. I did laundry and dishes. I made dad dinner and actually ate with him. I committed to taking him to a furniture store and lunch on sunday without fear of a REM dropout not allowing me to drive. This was a commitment I made in the online caregiver group on Tuesday and I feel good that I will be able to go back and say I followed through.

Yesterday was not without setbacks, however.  I am eating too much(still). Even though I am not working on calories, I don't feel like I eat THAT much... BUT... Weighed in at 246 this morning. Ugh. I feel huge, floppy, and disgusting. 

Realized this morning that I forgot to calibrate the last 2 sensors. Calibrated this morning and got a very different (less rosey) view of my sugar yesterday.

Before calibration:

After calibration:

***Face palm*** How did I forget to do something so simple? Still all the screenshots are still valid showing improvements in sugar control on the amino acid balancers. Just at what scale is the question.

I know what I did yesterday to mess up my sugar. Thursday I had 3 dinners and raised my overnight sugar. Yesterday I ran while fasting and dropped my sugar... but didn't get enough total calories at breakfast. I got too hungry and I didn't wait the full 4h to eat again. I basically had 2 lunches... which included a protein bar that was low carb but I don't think my body likes. I followed it with an on plan chicken salad but I added beans. My body says no! I did fast till dinner, but I was tired and run down at that point and the meal prep I had made was vile and inedible. I should have had a salad at that point but I wasn't thinking clearly and I had macadamia nuts and another protein bar. This wasn't enough volume and fiber... so at 9:30 or so when I couldn't sleep, I had another protein bar and macadamia nuts. I jacked up my sugar, wore my 91 body battery down to 7 and then prevented it from charging all the way up today.

Also I didn't drink enough water yesterday and got dehydrated. I just spaced.

Focus for today is to run book club, do some more writing, get the electrician to fix the heat, see a friend for coffee, and get back on track with fasting. Figure out a way to keep the CPAP from slipping off my hair while I sleep and popping out of my nose.

Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

horn_of_plenty on 12/04/2021:
It’s sooo good to hear that you are experiencing good sleep gains from the cpap go you, Happy :)

Sometimes fasting will def get a person too hungry to want to follow thru on their plan - that’s why I generally don’t do it much

Donkey on 12/05/2021:
I'm a little bit behind on commenting, so I'm glad to read that you've had a string of better days :-)

happy-1 - Friday Dec 03, 2021
Weight: 243.0

 Friday 12/3/21 6:30 am:

Yesterday I did pretty good... I got to Ralphs, did some writing, accomplished one business task with dad, made dinner, did laundry, washed dishes (3 sinks worth), took out trash barrels, changed the cat box. I couldn't keep going after 5:30pm, so I strapped on the CPAP and watched TV, trying to get used to it. I did fall asleep with it on, but then I took it off in my sleep again. It did work... while I had it on I got one fat bar of REM then almost nothing the rest of the night.

I struggled with meal portion and timing at dinner. I had salmon and suash with 2 keto bars for dessert. It should have been enough but I was just too hungry. I had a PAF meal, then later a sugar free flax muffin with cream cheese. If I'd had it all at once it wouldn't have spiked my sugar as much. Also, I was probably over calories but I am not ready to work on that yet.


At least the low sugar and 9+ hours of sleep charged me all the way up to 93!!!!!! Ready to rock and roll on my run today... and face changing my sheets and washing blankets. Why do I hate that chore?

Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

Jacky82020 on 12/03/2021:
Because everyone hates that chore!

Your Battery’s looking like an energizer!

happy-1 on 12/04/2021:
Feels sooo good to have clean sheets though!

Donkey on 12/04/2021:
Changing sheets - HATE IT. Bleah...

BUT I want to commend you for recognizing, for yourself, that this is not the time to be worrying about calories, other than to make good food choices for yourself for your blood sugar management. Also, timing is everything. I thought it was interesting that you had mentioned that if you had eaten everything at once, you probably would have had a spike. But since you spaced out when you ate what you ate, you were more successful with managing the blood sugar.

I myself think that "snacking" is what works better for me, as well. I'm not a person who can fast unless it involves overnight hours. The #1 thing that ruins a fast for me in the morning: gotta have that cup of coffee 1st thing in the morning (and can't drink it black).

Anyway, that is GREAT to see your battery being recharged into the low 90's - that is awesome. I hope you feel it too :-)

happy-1 on 12/04/2021:
Other way around… if I hadn’t spaced it out, I wouldn’t have had a spike…

I’m with you on the coffee. I have it with almond milk. I mix it with instant and it’s a flat white. 45 calories, so not so many it breaks a fast for sugar.

I felt so great yesterday! I seriously want you to get a Garmin!

happy-1 - Thursday Dec 02, 2021
Weight: 243.0

Thursday Dec 2, 2021 6:45 am

Yesterday was a beautiful foggy morning for a run... 

I ran very slowly but consistently. Garmin said I was in good condition (8), but had poor performance. My pace was 5 min slower than it was the day before Thanksgiving, but I didn't keep stopping and gasping for breath... so I don't understand. At least I only racked up 21 hours recovery time. 

I treated myself to Starbucks after... a shocking $14.25 to get 800 calories / right macros in after a 16h fast and a run to prevent a crash. Salad, egg bites, avocado spread. It was good, but I will make an effort to pack food for after my run. I didn't think that one all the way through... Still, a run is a run is a run. Rack another one up on the motivation wall. My kitty agreed and helped me recover by keeping my knee warm. She never tries to sleep on my knee. I wasn't favoring it. How did she know?

I was picking up my curbside Sam's club order when my Deliveries app told me my cpap was on the truck a day early for delivery. I raced home to camp out in my driveway. 30 min later it was in my hot little hands. I set it up immediately. I had the semi-disappointing discovery that they sent me a model without a cellular upload :(. No data to look at in the morning. Doesn't matter right now.... I wore it last night and got better sleep stats... enough REM to be semi-human today.

The most important part about that stat is the balanced deep and REM and percentage of overall sleep for efficiency. I pulled it off in my sleep at some point... without data I don't know when.... but REM started 60 min after I fell asleep... not a couple of hours. It did something. The awake time is because it took me longer to fall asleep with the new cpap and I had a hard time getting up on time this morning. Momma Cat kept at it though... She knows what's best for her kittens. She finally got me up at 6am to take my ADHD meds... A little late but I'll cut myself some slack this week to get used to the new CPAP. Good kitty. You earned the Meow Mix single servings of fish dinners that I special ordered so that you would have a fresh breakfast to look forward to in the morning. You are a great teammate! 

To better manage my sugar without meds, I need to move to 3 800 calorie meals a day, 9/1/5. I did ok with managing calories at breakfast and lunch... breakfast was Starbucks, lunch was chicken salad... but at 4pm I had a snack to try and pull together energy to make dad dinner (2 corn dogs) but it wasn't getting me there so I had some pumpkin seeds... which turned into a bag of pumpkin seeds... and then I topped it off with 3 keto chocolate macadamia nut bars. Instead of a tidy 800 calorie low carb dinner that would spike my sugar a tiny bit then go down overnight, it was a 2 hour grazing session from 4-6pm. Augh. I don't want to think about how many calories that was or what it did to my sugar. Luckily, I don't have to because the new sensor was still calibrating so it looks all wonky for yesterday.


I don't think I did too much damage though... I think my body really likes 16 hour fasts. My body battery charged to 76, sugar this morning was in range, and it doesn't show a lot of orange overnight.


I didn't get any writing done yesterday. I probably shouldn't have joined the ADHD discussion after a busy morning where I was already worn out. My crash happened after that. It was only an hour Zoom call but it took everyrhing out of me.

Refocusing and breathing through the mental clutter. Need to get dad groceries first and foremost... This will cause a major meltdown... so... put paperwork in car to work on, go to grocery store, return with groceries, turn around immediately to leave, find a spot to work today. Return for bedtime.

If I bought a cheap Chromebook and a wifi booster, could I use it to write challenge content from the driveway?


Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

Maria7 on 12/02/2021:
Being able to run and not stop to get your breath is a WINNER!!!

happy-1 on 12/02/2021:
Right???? Hugs

Jacky82020 on 12/02/2021:
Probably you can use the Chromebook in the driveway. I use my iPad in the backyard.

Cool fog pic! Nice kitty pic.

sounds like you have a very busy & productive day planned.

Haven’t been in a Starbucks for years. Brew all coffee here with freshly ground beans. So they sell food now other than the pastries? I remember when Starbucks debated that. They were worried food scents would overwhelm their trademark coffee aroma.

happy-1 on 12/02/2021:
Yeah... My blood pressure can't handle their coffee. It's super caffeinated. Plus it's a lot f $$$.... but it's the only fast food place I can get a dark green chicken salad with beans, quinoa and a non-inflammatory dressing.

happy-1 on 12/02/2021:
9:30am... Back from Ralphs, dad hasn't come out to see that I went without him again. The rage fit is coming. Scarfing down 2 PAF meals that taste like barf to get calories in.

Jacky82020 on 12/02/2021:
Ralph’s! The supermarket names Ralph’s & Von’s cracked me up when we moved from Northern California to Southern. None up north, at least then.

Yes! Starbucks coffee super caffeinated & overpriced. I used to buy their decaf beans before finding a Pennsylvania roaster with much better prices. That salad sounds wonderful!

happy-1 on 12/03/2021:
I prefer Trader Joe’s coffee to be honest. I’m just glad to have one on plan meal option on the road.

bearcountrygg on 12/02/2021:
Good first night with the cpap!!!

happy-1 on 12/03/2021:
Inch by inch, pebble by pebble, I will move a mountain.

Donkey on 12/03/2021:
You're right to give yourself some time to adjust to the CPAP. Don't ever be too hard on yourself about that. It really does take time.

happy-1 on 12/03/2021:
Yeah, I wish I had a view of the data in the morning. It would be motivating

happy-1 - Wednesday Dec 01, 2021
Weight: 243.0

Wed 12/1/21 6:30 am:

Yesterday was almost successful... had some ginseng tea, tracked down the next cpap shipment (comes tomorrow, please pray), got all my fasting labs done (even figured out that 2 were mysteriously missing from the system), ate a healthy starbucks salad, went to one grocery store (scored some half price chicken and fish), made up chicken for the week when I got home, ate, had some more ginseng tea, and then attended my first online caregiver support group meeting (training in april). 

After the support group meeting I had the weirdest energy crash. I don't know if it was the exhaustion of trying to talk with ladies on the group, content, or the tea... but I just got hungry, cold, achey, stiff and tired. Writing was just not happening. I ate 4 corn dogs and a bag of pumpkin seeds. I listened to headspace meditations. I pet the cat. At 5 I pulled it together to go pay a bill, come back, make my dad a burger, and finish putting groceries away. Then I went to bed. I was asleep by 8:15.

Slept 8:59 last night but only 1:08 REM. With the deficit there should have been a 2:00 REM rebound. But no. Oh please CPAP that is coming tomorrow, break this cycle.

Sugar is continuing to improve... only one spike yesterday. The second spike is from the 4 corn dogs... but interestingly it is about the same as what I was getting off a salad with some crunchies before I started the amino balancers. It cuts off after dinner because I fell asleep too fast and didn't scan and then the sensor expired...

BUT my body battery charged to 81 without enough REM so I am guessing sugar was in range overnight. The stress is orange when sugar is too high overnight.

It looks like REM started an hour after the last orange bar. I wonder if there is a correlation between when sugar drops into range and when REM starts?






Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

bearcountrygg on 12/01/2021:
I think if I was you I would be sitting out at the end of the driveway tomorrow.......

happy-1 on 12/01/2021:
LOL!!! I was at Sams club when my Deliveries app told me it was on the truck for delivery a day early.... I went straight home and camped out waiting for it... IT'S HERE!!!!!

Maria7 on 12/01/2021:
Glad you are feeling better. Hope you have a good day.

happy-1 on 12/01/2021:

Jacky82020 on 12/01/2021:
So glad the CPAP is almost there!

happy-1 on 12/02/2021:
Inch by inch…

Jacky82020 on 12/01/2021:
So glad the CPAP is almost there!

happy-1 on 12/01/2021:
It’s here!

bearcountrygg on 12/01/2021:

happy-1 on 12/03/2021:

Donkey on 12/01/2021:
So glad to read that your CPAP machine has arrived!!!!

happy-1 on 12/02/2021:
I will conquer!

horn_of_plenty on 12/02/2021:
i know you say yesterday was ALMOST successful, but there are def some successes in there! not all a fail!

nice job on your deals at the supermarket. food is so expensive, prob highest in cali compared to any other state (based on oil prices also being highest in your state out of the whole country!). it feels good to get sales at the supermarket.

and i hate when i find a mistake on my recipt once i'm home...so i always try to check it now at the store, even if i look dumb standing there, doing so!...bc it's better to spot it before leaving the store, than once at home!

whenever i have a flavored drink without sugar, i tend to add a treat with sugar to equal it out...so my body tastes a flavor in the drink, and does get some sugar as well...it prevents sugar issues for my body...plus your stomach still stays full from the liquid...so instead of just a sugar treat, you get liquid with it too..i do this a lot when i'm going to work out for a boost of energy before exercising..

happy-1 on 12/03/2021:
Good idea! Hugs!

happy-1 on 12/03/2021:
Also, ty for reminding me to celebrate my successes.

Maria7 on 12/02/2021:
Hugs to you, too. Have a blessed day!

happy-1 on 12/03/2021:
Aaaaaaaaw ty.

happy-1 - Tuesday Nov 30, 2021
Weight: 243.0

Tuesday Nov 30, 2021, 6:30am/

Momma cat is back on the job. Last night she made sure I went to sleep on time by insisting I put down my phone and not use it at bedtime. It was hilarious... everytime I picked it up (was researching CFS and REM) she marched over and demanded petting. Who can resist a solid, sturdy, fluffy, purring kitty kat? This morning I was oversleeping and she did the full wakeup drill... clawing at my head, marching up and down my body. Purring for rubs... Good kitty. Keep me on schedule.

Insomnia last night was because I forgot to take the gaba, melatonin, and glycine.

Sugar was almost well-managed yesterday. My hot keto breakfast caused a 22 point spike. Probably the protein powder. The second spike was triggered by dad stress. He didn't like his breakfast in bed that I tried to be extra nice with... absolutely beat your dog for bringing you your slippers. Then I had a snack and lunch to spike it more, a walk to bring it down, and a low carb dinner. The astonishing thing is that I ate the same meals and had the same walk on Friday before I started taking the amino acid balancers and the spikes were 50-100 points higher and I needed to take 2 glipizide to get them down. Just astonishing. With these lower spikes, all I need to do is work on timing and I can get my baseline down and sugar 90% in range or better.

I took it easy again yesterday and was rewarded with enough REM to be functional.

Onwards and upwards. Today I have fasting labs... at 9:30am. This will probably screw me up pretty bad.

Priorities are the labs and a stop at trader joes and ralphs. Then home to do more writing.

Tomorrow I run


Progress as of today: 74 lbs lost so far, only 83 lbs to go!

Maria7 on 11/30/2021:
Wow, you have a very SPECIAL cat! Have a good day.

happy-1 on 12/02/2021:
Lol… or I’m just nuts… also a possibility.

bearcountrygg on 11/30/2021:
Your cat was made to belong to you....she is thanking you for giving her a home!!!

happy-1 on 12/02/2021:
At least someone appreciates me, right?

Horn_of_plenty on 11/30/2021:
i love a pet that insists on being cuddled!!! :)

happy-1 on 12/03/2021:
Purr purr purr, cuddle cuddle cuddle, love love love

Donkey on 12/01/2021:
Let us know the results of your lab work!!! GOOD!!!

happy-1 on 12/03/2021:
I get it 12/3 end of day

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