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happy-1 - Monday Oct 15, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

GP called and let me know that I have arthritis and moderate disc degeneration C4-C7. I can do normal activities, but need to be careful of anything that causes pain... or causes pain afterwards... Which isn't going to work because that's pretty much EVERYTHING.

I think my max on days without yoga is 5. Started to feel the headaches come back again today after moving boxes around. I'm craving yoga like I used to crave a jacuzzi.

My claims to fame today are:

1) Starting my graindart streak over. Day 1. All on-plan eating today of whole foods that support bones and nerves... most of which are meal-prepped trays.

2) Feeling better exactly 10 days after I caught my cold. Still coughing, and coughing too much to go out... but I can tell it is clearing. I am pretty excited about this because it means my immune system is stronger and my supplement stack and work with the nutritionist has made a big difference. It used to be that if I got a cold, it lasted forever, turned into a bacterial infection and then I was on steroids and antibiotics. All I took for this one was my regular inhaler and cough syrup.

3) I did 3 tasks I planned to do today without a lot of messing around.

4) I have not cursed at all today.

5) I am about to fall on my sword and offer to take my dad to Ralphs, which I hate doing. But it will be my act of kindness for today.

6) I sorted through my ADHD-hurricane I created while I was sick in the bedroom I need to clean out. When I don't feel well, it looks like the space around me exploded. I put it back in order and felt less chaotic.

7) I did all the dishes and did not say anything about it.

8) I put up with my dog and her door shennanigans like a saint.

9) I listened to my neck and took a break as soon as it started acting up instead of trying to push through it.


Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 10/16/2018:
Your good eats and meal prepping will def keep you on your Graindart Streak! That's really the best way to stay on plan. I also meal prep for work almost always and it helps. I packed some of my low sugar (healthy) pumpkin brownies for breakfast today and tomorrow along with some chicken burgers to add to my Indian prepared veggies! :) i like to mix my own food with what i buy out to generate a full meal since i do NOT cook everything i eat!

It's so great your cold didn't lead to anything worse...i know what you mean - i used to really have a similar issue especially if i didn't take care of my colds or if i didn't get enough rest when i needed it!

nice job cleaning up and getting everything back into order!!

Horn_of_plenty on 10/16/2018:
i agree with your comments a few entries back - you have certainly put in LOTS of effort to heal and progress ! and even your weight loss is amazing!

happy-1 on 10/16/2018:
Thanks! I feel kind of awkward about some of it because I feel like I should be strong enough to do stuff on my own without help... or paying for things... but the nutritionist unlocked my ability to get to sleep at a set bedtime and helped me break my plateau, and generally eat less and healthier on a daily basis so I guess some of it worked out. Other things didn’t... like I bought a couple of fancy binders trying to get organized...

BearCountryGG on 10/16/2018:
I have almost the exact same issues but with bone spurs, narrowing and slipped discs too...….lifting can really set things off...and so can sitting at the computer too long.......and pushing a shopping cart....but the clincher for me was when the dr asked if I was having incontenance problems yet.....NO!!!!

happy-1 - Monday Oct 15, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

Ha. Figured it out. A weird dvd is no match for me.

I think what the xray is showing me is that I don't actually have a reversed curve in my neck anymore. It's just straight up and down...  I'll ask the doc and see what she says.

Found this online. Pretty much matches my xray. 

Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

Horn_of_plenty on 10/15/2018:
that looks very different, i hope you are still not in pain and that you can continue to manage it!

happy-1 on 10/15/2018:
Yeah that's not my neck... But the left side looks like it. The right side is my goal. Funny... I was pinning fitness before and after weight loss transformations and now I am pinning neck before/after transformations.

Horn_of_plenty on 10/16/2018:
and the transformations are totally without medical procedures!?!?!? really!? ?????

happy-1 - Sunday Oct 14, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

Short post tonight. Lost whole day to being sick. Mostly due to asthma and coughing. I had a bunch of personal things to get accomplished today that did not get done. Should have just left the house this morning and done my best. But I got some rest and hopefully that means productivity tomorrow.

I think I am hitting the limit on days I can go without doing yoga. Neck is starting to hurt again.

Dog is making me crazy today. Wants to be near me but as soon as I cough she gets annoyed and leaves then bangs the screen door. As soon as I give her tramadol, she wants to go for a walk. Except I can't breathe so I can barely get to the end of the driveway.

Still can’t get dad’s dvd drive unstuck and he won’t let me do the paper clip thing. I’ll have to wait till they go to the grocery store and then... that DVD is mine.

Update: Got the DVD while dad was in kitchen... but it needs special software. There's a free version but it is a really big download. The battle continues.

I can't wait to start my streak over. Cheats today were a box of mac n cheese, dark chocolate, linguine. Too much agave.  Tempted to throw away the pasta... except I can't bring myself to throw away food. I cleaned out the pantry to look for stuff to get rid of for the food bank as my claim to fame today.

Not sure why OOMLG is STILL TEXTING ME. I like him, I wanted to date him, he turned me down flat... but wants to be friends because I am awesome but not wife material. Fine. This is my good deed. Politely text a clueless engineer who would totally be into me if I were 2 years younger. Which makes me want to punch him in the nose. Except I enjoy our conversations. 


Listening to the Interworld series by Neil Gaiman on Audible. Some podcasts from KFI 640. I think I really am happier and more productive without Hulu or Netflix.

Except I miss watching it when I am sick. On the other hand... Super organized pantry. Bag for the food bank next weekend. Packed all my supplements and meds for the month... Took a nap. Cuddled my fat yellow dog. Washed dishes. Made really good turkey meatballs...

Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

happy-1 - Saturday Oct 13, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

Got my x ray on a cd. In a cruel twist of fate, my dad tried to help me open it and see what came back and it got stuck in his laptop and the thing won’t open. Doc isn’t in office till tuesday. ai literally just felt my whole soul just explode. It has been in his dvd drive for a day and a half now.


I still have a cold and didn’t go out tonight to try to find my old laptop since my current one is about to go belly up. When I found it I just kept cleaning and threw out about half the containers in the fridge. Basically took out all my frustrations on the bathroom and the kitchen. Constructive at least. By the end I am tired enough to sleep and either I feel better or the house is clean. Both are a win.

CERT class tomorrow. I packed all on-plan foods so i can start my graindart streak over tomorrow. I was half on plan today because I needed to clean out the fridge to eat on plan. Feels bad to throw away food but so much of the condiments in there have hidden sugars and were bad for us. Fully expect parents to freak tomorrow. I will not be there. Maybe Molly will let me hide at her house, LoL.

Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

Donkey on 10/13/2018:
That's so frustrating about the CD/laptop. I hope maybe you can get it opened today?

happy-1 on 10/14/2018:
Got it. I'll work on the download tomorrow :-)

happy-1 on 10/14/2018:
Got it. I'll work on the download tomorrow :-)

happy-1 on 10/14/2018:
Got it. I'll work on the download tomorrow :-)

happy-1 on 10/14/2018:
Got it. I'll work on the download tomorrow :-)

BearCountryGG on 10/13/2018:
Apparently it jammed? I have been known to give electronis a SMACK....LOL...not suggesting that though...………...

happy-1 on 10/13/2018:
That would either kill him or he’d kill me. Either way I wouldn’t be allowed back in the house. I think I could do something worthy of extended incarceration and he wouldn’t blink an eye... but lo the person who mistreats a computer...

Maria7 on 10/13/2018:
Hope you feel better.

happy-1 on 10/14/2018:
TY! I accept that God sent me a cold so I would be certain to show up for my X-ray this week, but did I need the lingering cough ;)?

Horn_of_plenty on 10/14/2018:
Nice job cleaning out your fridge and continuing to work to be on plan for this coming week! I was cooking today too...i am fully prepped for the week with my tofu, eggs and chicken burgers!

happy-1 on 10/14/2018:
Good job! Yum! Proud of you!

happy-1 - Thursday Oct 11, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

Fell off my graindart streak. I have had pasta, bread, apple butter and too much dark chocolate because I am super sick, my throat hurts, and I am coughing like crazy on not enough sleep. Plus I am having an existential crisis about what to do with my life.

Focusing on the dr visit and doing my best.

Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 10/11/2018:
Feel better.....chicken soup greases the sore throat.

happy-1 on 10/14/2018:
Mmmmm. Just need to make some I guess.

graindart on 10/11/2018:
Make it a one day fall. Beginning of new streak starts tomorrow.

happy-1 on 10/15/2018:
It was a few days, but back at it today!

BearCountryGG on 10/11/2018:
Yeah....you can get back on the wagon hap

happy-1 on 10/15/2018:
Yeah, I only truly fell off for one day, but it took me three days to clean things up so I could get back on the wagon today. All on-plan eating today.

happy-1 - Wednesday Oct 10, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

220.3. At least I’m not gaining a ton of weight even though I have a cold. I swear God sent the cold just to make sure I show up for that GP appointment on Thursday because I was freaking out and thinking about not going. Now I need to go to get asthma meds and antibiotics. A cosmic gorilla joke.

However, my streak continues. 11 days pain-free. 17 days of graindart productivity and progression towards IHMST (I Have My Stuff Together... I need to stop cursing). Had some aches and pains last night, the room was too hot, felt kind of swimmy, and I was starving but it could have been my cold, not my neck.

Continuing to pull my total picture together. I am a little freaked out and started to panic, but I am smart and capable and I can do this. Better to be feeling better and cleaing up a mess than not feeling better and still blundering around.

Last night in yoga I was able to grab my toes in a seated position and stretch my legs all the way to the floor. It was definitely on the edge of pain, but feeling fine today. I can’t remember if I could do that in high school. I think not.

Every day makes me better and better. Doing DDP yoga in the park tonight instead of class so I don’t get people sick.

Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

BearCountryGG on 10/10/2018:
Every day you are getting better and better......that's great!

happy-1 on 10/10/2018:

horn_of_plenty on 10/10/2018:
you're certainly feeling so good!!! pretty amazing, despite having a minor cold. luckily it's nothing worse!

are you sure you do not need to go to class??

you've gotta also feel good on your yoga progress.

17-day streak is just outstanding!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

happy-1 on 10/10/2018:
I got too sweaty and sick yesterday in yoga class. Pretty much went home and passed out. Better to stay home and avoid this teacher since she's pregnant.

happy-1 - Tuesday Oct 09, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

Saw OT yesterday and it wasn’t as productive as I would have liked. She wasn’t prepared for me to be “back”... more like next steps for someone in chronic pain... but I’m 10 days pain-free. Still, tiny steps forward. Caught a cold Saturday and I wasn’t feeling too hot and I didn’t want to miss yoga so I had some dark chocolate buttons. This morning I woke up at 3:30am with more of a cold and had peppermint tea with agave. So added sugar but normal portions... it’s not like I fell off the wagon. More medicinal, so I’m not counting that as breaking my graindart streak. Day 16.

Had another time standstill moment yesterday. I got to the OT appointment, ate some of the lunch I packed and put on makeup while waiting. Even has time to brush and floss before going in. It was nice to feel “put together “ there for once.

My dog is being extra lovey to me today to let me know that she is very sorry for ****ting my bed last night and is super embarrassed about that. Of course I forgive my ancient fur baby.

Yoga teacher yesterday said that I did great in my level 2 class and she’s shocked at how fast my body is changing and how my balance is improving. It must be all the non-processed foods the nutritionist on Rise is pushing me towards. My dog would like you all to know that she has changed her opinion on yoga classes. She’s not a big fan of being stuck at home but she really enjoyed being butt to butt this morning and getting her ears scratched at the same time. Definitely woof it.

Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

Donkey on 10/09/2018:
There is some kind of sinus/cold thing going around my office, too. I don't have it, but my daughter seems to have caught something -- maybe from her work. I too don't count medicinal treatments (e.g. whiskey) as going off plan.

happy-1 on 10/09/2018:
Lol. Another whiskey girl. What’s your poison, and straight or on the rocks?

happy-1 on 10/09/2018:
And I was shocked how much the peppermint tea helped even with agave instead of honey.

graindart on 10/09/2018:
Woke up at just after 3am myself this morning. Was wide awake. Knew I should try to go back to sleep, but decided to get a few things done on the computer instead. Just made breakfast for the family and they'll be leaving for school soon. It's only 7am now, but I'm already starting to lag. Will definitely be ready for bed early tonight.

happy-1 on 10/09/2018:
Good job! I just wandered around in a fog and cleaned things (microwave, dishes, etc.). My brain isn’t on till I’ve walked my dog.

BearCountryGG on 10/09/2018:
Pain free is awesome.....it just does not get any better than that!!! Eating better and stretching in yoga classes is working well for you my friend......keep those up!!!

happy-1 on 10/09/2018:
Hugs! Thank you for all the support and encouragement. I don’t think I’d be this far along without DD and the folks on it.

BearCountryGG on 10/09/2018:
Your dog reminds me of our last house dog...she lived to be a very old lady....pathetic to look at...and leaking all over the place.....she was such a sweetie though....she was always jealous of the cat that always seemed to be on the furniture....she was an English setter ( black and white)...and our refusal to let her on the furniture made her unhappy and sad....but it was a decision we made.....she would sit and glare at the cat.....so once in awhile I would rock her...she was all elbows and knees....sitting with all of her legs perched in the air.on my lap...and laying her head back against mine..she was in heaven......

happy-1 on 10/09/2018:
Aaaaaaaaaaw. I do that at the campfire. I burrito her in a kiddie sleeping bag and hold her on my lap while scratching her ears. I can never believe that my big plush toy is the same crazy dog that used to try to bite me and growled at me if I came too close. You’d think she never had a bad day in her life to look at her now. Dogs are great.

BearCountryGG on 10/09/2018:
yeah...….nothing quite like a dog that wants to cuddle...they truly love with all of their hearts.

happy-1 on 10/10/2018:
She had to eat dog food tonight because I need to go food shopping. On the other side of the room with her back to me. Definitely a message

horn_of_plenty on 10/09/2018:
Seems PT / OT woman who wasn't prepared to have you "back" in on a money-making hunt! - PS - many doctors are!

I guess having an old dog can lead to old dog issues like her bed accident

happy-1 on 10/10/2018:
Yeah, but I don’t get that vibe from her. It’s more that she comes from privilege and has never had to deal with any of this... plus I literally did a 180 once my neck and shoulders were in the right position. Like a big fog lifted. My yoga teachers all say I don’t look or sound like the same person. They just don’t see radical turnarounds that much... Remember... I’m not just doing the OT program. A LOT of work went into getting healthier. I’m doing DD, a daily health education challenge, Rise, Classpass, DDP Yoga, 2 dog walks a day, church, and a giant supplement stack. I also gave up my career, independent adulthood, and crashed on my parents couch to make those changes. People rarely throw themselves 100% into making changes on that level. She was prepared for a different kind of meeting.

happy-1 - Monday Oct 08, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

Day 15 of my graindart streak. 9 days pain, headache, and fog free. I went to a CERT class on Saturday with friends. Sunday I went through personal paperwork and started picking up the pieces. It is shocking how little I got done the past 2 years. Such minor tasks. Augh. Had this weird experience where I went to the 99 cent store that nearly always takes forever on a sunday (I really, really needed binder dividers) but this time I was out and home in time to change my shirt, eat, and still make it to church on time. Like time stood still and gave me an extra 3 hours. Or I’m just feeling that much better and I did things in a normal time allowance. I haven’t had to lay down and take a break to rest my neck in a couple of weeks now.

Today I do paperwork, see the OT, and go to yoga. Car is already packed and ready for yoga. Healthy snacks are in the fridge and prepped to go. I woke up on time and had my oatmeal with an apple (super hungry today, ready to nibble on my dog). I figured out how to pair an old bluetooth hr monitor with the ddp yoga app and I am ready to start recording my workouts.

Taking advantage of every minute to turn it all around.

Can’t wait for yoga today. The teacher yesterday is super pregnant and I thought I was getting a cold so I skipped her AM double header (she is really, really incredible and does an amazing class). Spent all day yesterday thinking about every sore spot on my body and how much better it would feel if I had gone and turned myself into a pretzel for a couple of hours. I used to longingly think about jacuzzis that way.

Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

Donkey on 10/08/2018:
You accomplished a lot. I'm impressed!

Horn_of_plenty on 10/08/2018:
Wow! This entry is written like a breath of fresh air! wow, you sound fabulous like you are feeling so good like a weight was lifted off of you!

When i'm super hungry i sometimes go for oatmeal too but i'm always still needed a snack a couple hours after it when i have like a minor sugar dip! does this happen to you!?

good eats and organization you have going on!

Keep up the great work, Happy!

graindart on 10/08/2018:
Good job continuing the streak. Glad you're feeling better physically.

happy-1 - Saturday Oct 06, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

Glad DD is back! Felt so isolated while it was down

Day 13 of my Graindart streak. I got up at 5 and took my CERT class as my test of whether I can sit through a work day. I felt almost there... Like another couple of weeks of daily yoga and I have a shot at a lower back that will do that. I think my lower back is weakened. I was more distractable than I would normally want to be. Partially because I was starving the whole time. I’m burning 3500 calories a day right now and I was just so hungry. Partially because it was so freaking boring. I might need to stretch more at breaks.

It was nice to hang with friends for the day. Looking forward to next week.

Deleted all photos, texts, calls, and other trails of OOMLG. Out of sight, out of mind. No need to torture myself with a guy that’s not into me.

Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

graindart on 10/07/2018:
Keep the streak alive and you'll be enjoying the new scale numbers over the next couple weeks. You'll be dropping into the teens and hitting that 100 lbs lost mark.

happy-1 on 10/07/2018:
Can’t wait. I feel so much better, on the level of a miracle.

Donkey on 10/07/2018:
Donkey is cheering you on!

happy-1 on 10/08/2018:
what’s a donkey cheer? A bray? Why am I picturing the donkey from shrek?

happy-1 on 10/08/2018:
what’s a donkey cheer? A bray? Why am I picturing the donkey from shrek?

Horn_of_plenty on 10/08/2018:
Me too! i was missing DD like MAD!

WOW that is some serious calorie burn! wow! i'd be eating all sorts of treats if that were me! oh my! fries for days hahaha.

good job getting back on track. With certain guys, i have had to delete all traces too. and now, when i get this urge to contact a guy that would be for nothing other than a casual experience, i find myself talking myself out of it! for the first time in my life, i feel i have ENOUGH. i have a male friend, R, that i hang out with and sometimes am "romantic" with. and it's SO ENOUGH for me! although i don't want him as my boyfriend, he is a good friend. this is all i want for now.

but back to the deleting of men and all the reminders, i have had to do this quite a number of times in my life. well, maybe more like just 3 or 4 times in major cases. At least 2 of the times, i liked the guy like head over heals. it took a lot of reminders at first to realize that they weren't giving me in return what i wanted...and it took me YEARS to forget them. so hard. both men i had known for numerable years and both men it took me double the years i knew them to forget them. i liked them that much..still i am reminded of them, but i cannot go back to even trying because for a good reason the first is married and doesn't live in this state, so he's done...

and the second one went out of his way to finally show me we couldn't date. it was so hard. but he is unattainable. it seems he's single mostly or maybe gay or maybe doesn't want a "live in" woman...but either case he's late 40's and not married and i don't think it'll happen for him until he's past 50. i am not sure, he seemed like a good catch at the time, but he's not. still you see i think about him, but, i know i cannot reach out that it'd get me nowhere :) but perhaps being ignored !

happy-1 - Thursday Oct 04, 2018
(Change everything every minute. All things thru C)
Weight: 220.0

Down! .7 of a lb. Also took measurements and I lost 4% bodyfat with that 1.7lb plateau bust!!!! Holy smokes, Batman! I'm at 35.7% bodyfat and 31% is considered healthy. 

- 1/2 inch off my ribs

- 1 inch off my waist

- 2.5 inches off my butt

Somehow, my boobs and calves both got bigger by 1/2 an inch. No explanation.

Day 11 of Graindart streak. Every passing minute is a chance to turn it all around.

He might have been my nose punch from God, but I can work hard and be out of OOMLG's league, right? 

I'm trying. Managing to GSD today.


Progress as of today: 97 lbs lost so far, only 14 lbs to go!

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