Back down below 250 today... 249.3 Yay!!! Lowest in months. Maybe I was hanging onto food from stress or something with the wisdom teeth out. Or eating too much soft junk food. Anyway, that is only 2lbs up from my lowest weight.
God may be rewarding me for cancelling on my ex after I bootycalled him. I might have gotten back down to 247 if I hadn't bootycalled him at all.
I think I see a 24 hour fitness membership in my future so I have something else to do in the middle of the night.
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Breafast: 2 softboiled eggs, margerine, 2 pieces of white toast
Lunch: Pasta, fake meat, sauce, cheese, stevia soda
-- Updating for yesterday
Snack: 8 milano cookies, 1 fun size m&ms.
Dinner: Not really sure. I had some coleslaw with extra cabbage added, a quesedilla with 1 wheat tortilla and cheese,
Progress as of today: 58.7 lbs lost so far, only 69.3 lbs to go!
Ok, so here's an example of when I end up eating out... Working from home. It's 2pm. I missed my snack and lunch and am now starving. Nothing in the fridge sounds good and everything I bought in the last couple of days seems gross. If I went out, I dunno what I'd get. Probably Taco Bell, wendys or mcdonalds. Easily $10-14 because I try to buy the healthiest options.
My options are: scrambled eggs, wheat spaghetti with either marinara or fake alfredo, pbj, grilled cheese, soup from a can, chili from a can, yogurt, yogurt protein brownie, frozen pizza.
I feel like having leftover beef stew if I had any. I avoid making that stuff because 1) Kitchen needs deep cleaning weekly. Parents are messy and don't clean up after themselves. 2) If I make anything really good, my parents can't control themselves and eat multiple servings in a single sitting, 3) they are on medical weight loss programs and lost 150lbs together and I don't want to throw my parents off their diets, 4) there is no space in the fridge or freezer for ingredients or resulting meals, 5) it is a lot of planning, work, effort and expense to only get one meal out of it when I need at least 2 containers of leftovers to manage the time out of my week, 6) It starts bickering and discord... I get blamed for making them eat too much, taking up space in the fridge, and guilt over eating what I spent on... 7) there is an ongoing struggle because I carefully buy foods without trans fats or high sodium and certain things organic. Best case is they finish those off and replace them with stuff that is super cheap but awful. Most likely scenario is they finish it off and don't replace it or add it to my grocery list or let me know they ate it or ask for it when I ask if they need anything so I can buy more.
My therapist says that being with my parents is an unhealthy situation and until I move out I won't gain any ground.
Not eating anything anyway. Because... Ow. And out of time for lunch. Good thing I stocked up on protein shakes.
Progress as of today: 57.8 lbs lost so far, only 70.2 lbs to go!
I am happy to hear that you are eating the healthy options at those restaurants - I do this too. If you want to save money, you can buy some bagged salad and chicken pre-cooked from the supermarket and put the chicken in the greens! and voila. Should last 2 meals at least...and if you buy maybe a few bagged salads - even longer. :)
Didn't get the job with the agency. They said a lot of nice things, but they want someone with agency experience and client facing skills. The client facing part burns. I have no idea where I would start to reinvent myself as someone with client facing skills. I took a bunch of business and communication classes after I left the consulting company... I don't think they took. There's a polish and a gamesmanship to being client-facing I just don't have and it keeps holding me back.
Day 4 after getting wisdom teeth out. I think I am a little less swollen. Sticking to protein shakes today. Eating just isn't worth it.
Not sure what I ate the last several days. Probably pudding, grilled cheeses, soup.
Progress as of today: 57.8 lbs lost so far, only 70.2 lbs to go!
Super ow. Missing an off road expo with friends.
B - skipped S- skipped L- pudding cup, cup of noodles. Dad went out and got me pudding. Yay dad! D - felt better. 1/2 a frozen lasagna
Progress as of today: 57.8 lbs lost so far, only 70.2 lbs to go!
Glad you are starting to feel better. Those cup noodles are sinfully good.
Wisdom teeth out. Ow.
Skipped all meals till dinner.
D- 6 puddings. 2 mac n cheese
Progress as of today: 57.8 lbs lost so far, only 70.2 lbs to go!
Still stuck at 250.2. Have been eating lighter due to problems with wisdom teeth, so not sure why. I feel skinnier at least. Today I go for a presurgery consult and then tomorrow hopefully I get them out on Friday. It is going to be expensive. I have never wanted to go to a dentist and looked forward to spending a bunch of money on it so badly in my life. Haven't been writing here because I have been out sick and not feeling well at all. I'm hoping they can do a post for my missing tooth at the same time. Will find out today.
Also, I have to finish moving out of the trailer today. I am probably ok at my curent job till January, but my food bill is so high, I need to change strategies. Looking for an Airbnb for Monday or Tuesday and I need to put my profile together.
Was not in round of layoffs yeserday. There were some surprises. People I thought were really good and I am not sure why I am still there if they aren't.
Haven't heard back on interview yet. The longer it is taking them to respond to me the more I want the job. Looking for other similar companies I can try to network my way to in case it doesn't happen.
Met a guy on Tinder I like a lot. It is a little weird because I see the person he used to be and can be again and it makes me want to develop a company that caters to his unique needs for fitness. At the same time, I feel like he'd be a great house husband... If I can ever get my sh*t together. Z is 6'5, norwegian descent, played college football. He got sidetracked in school when his brother got sick, then followed a series of women around instead of working on his own life. Now he is crashing with his mom and stepdad in their tiny apartment and working at Walgreens. At 34, he's still majorly into the comic book/fandom geek stuff and quoing lines from science fiction... which in general I find obnoxious but maybe can put up with... And if he gets healthy... And finds a job where he can support himself and live independently. He wants kids, but there is something scary about having kids with someone who can't entirely support themselves... I can be a breadwinner in theory and there is always life insurance... But if something ever happened to me, I'd worry they wouldn't make the right choices and make grown adults out of our kids. Or they would end up in foster care. Still he wants a wife and kids... so that is something. We met in person last weekend for a quick lunch and text a lot. I told him I see him as a ****able guy with a good heart, and that I like him but he is a hot mess, and I am a hot mess, so we can't both of us be a hot mess. We want to do a 1 week stretch of the Pacific Crest Trail in March as a 6 month goal to no longer be hot messes. I will work on my list later tonight.
But it makes me miss my ex like crazy. M doesn't want more kids. Can't get around that part. Or the part where he treated me casually years into the relationship... But still I miss him. He fit my mental template of "hero" the way that nobody else does. His birthday is coming up in a couple of weeks. All I can think about is calling him to wish him a happy birthday. I probably shouldn't.
Thank you to all the people commenting and getting me back to logging. Gotta move forward!
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B - Skipped
S - 1 packet instant oatmeal
L - Lean cuisine, salad, ranch dressing
S - bagel and cream cheese
D - Chicken Pho, Vietnamese iced coffee
S - Chicken burrito
S - Microwave brownie mix with greek yogurt
Progress as of today: 57.8 lbs lost so far, only 70.2 lbs to go!
B - Coffee and cream, cramming homework
Progress as of today: 57.8 lbs lost so far, only 70.2 lbs to go!
Back filling
B - 3 eggs, cheese, oatmeal, coffee
L - Sharkys - Chicken, quinoa and veggies
S - cupcake
D - Burger, 1/2 a cider
S2 - Cupcake
Midnight panic attack pizza
--
Progress as of today: 57.8 lbs lost so far, only 70.2 lbs to go!
Woke up to a lovely text from my favorite recruiter that they really liked me and want to bring me back in for a second interview. Oh happy, happy, happy day. It isn't the most stable of companies but it is in an area I really like and it is a chance to get some agency experience.
B - 2 cups of motel coffee with half and half, persian oatmeal cup, 3 eggs, shredded cheese
S - Skipped
L - Thai curry bowl with chicken. Microwave meal. So nice to have decent refridgeration.
S - Potato chips, carrots, ranch
D -
Progress as of today: 57.8 lbs lost so far, only 70.2 lbs to go!
B - motel breakfast- waffle, syrup, sausage, egg, coffee
L - el pollo loco - chicken avocado burrito
S1 - Potato chips
D - souplantation, salad, 2 bowls of soup, 2 pieces of bread
S2 -
Progress as of today: 57.8 lbs lost so far, only 70.2 lbs to go!
have a good interview, wishing you the best always.
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