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happy-1 - Sunday May 08, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

Sun 5-8-22 7:40am

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms!

I miss my mom.

Shake it off.

Somehow despite lying around like a sloth yesterday, or because of it, I dozed off at 8:30 while running the AC before bed. Oops. I not only didn't turn off the electric, I ran up the bill. At leat I got up at 2 and turned it off. Augh. I slept 10 hours and got a ton of REM. The cat kept checking to make sure I am still breathing. She would definitely eat me if I wasn't. She is not happy with this switch to wet food we are doing and has stuck her mouse in the middle of her plate, like a cake topper.

Time to go for a walk and do something worthwhile with my day. One day of just giving up and lying there was a necessary sacrifice. 2 leads to depression.

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
Inch by inch

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
7:50… ok, I will walk and conquer the day after I make tea in the steamer and lay here for 15 more minutes….

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
9am. Just finished my tea. I can get my body moving and do a walk. I can overcome inertia and get moving again. Get on schedule for tomorrow.

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
9:30am. Back from my walk. Dad wants to engage. I’m torn between staying clear so I can pull myself back together and start the week off right tomorrow… or making blueberry pancakes and sausage in honor of mom for mother’s day. I miss her. I really miss her. Made my bed. My bedroom is in disarray from not feeling well yesterday. I should probably start there. I need to resist the urge to lie in bed all day and watch tv a second day in a row or I won’t build up enough sleep drive. I definitely need to do laundry.

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
10:30... Laundry started. Breakfast is heating up. Tidying of bedroom in progress. It's not a mess, it's just a little awry and visually cluttered because the space is multi-use.

Told dad I'd make pancakes for lunch. He got hopeful I went grocery shopping, I said no I planned ahead for Mother's Day.

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
12:45pm Laundry done. More tidying done. Next time to change dad sheets, wash them and start pancakes.

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
Oops. spoke too soon. Dad is asleep. Can't make any noise to wake him. I'll make them for dinner.

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
4pm. Sugar is finally back down in range. Step one of getting back up is in progress. Bedroom is tidy. I’ve been watching Masterpiece theater because I don’t want to make a lot of boise doing chores in the house while he sleeps. He’s finally in the bed.

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
7:48 Dad doesn’t want pancakes because there’s no milk. He won’t drink powdered or almond. Sigh.

9:41 still up watching tv. Do I know better? Yes.

happy-1 on 05/09/2022:
12:20 am. Finally in bed. Should have been here hours ago. If I just avoided my dad I’d be in better shape but it’s not realistic.

happy-1 on 05/09/2022:
Someday I would like to be completely indifferent to my dad and not so crushed every time I interact with him.

happy-1 on 05/09/2022:
Lord, thank you for shelter, bobcat, and my cat. Please help me get restorative sleep tonight and host a good coworking session tomorrow. Help me be more joyful and a better person.


Donkey on 05/08/2022:
(((hugs))) A walk always seems to help me clear my mind.

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
Yes!!!


bearcountrygg on 05/08/2022:
I'm surprised that she dislikes the wet food.......it's usually the other way around.....Definitely ...too much thinking leads to depression.....I started taking B12 the other day and I have to say......I feel better mentally....( of course one should ask the DR if they are on prescription meds.

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
I bet b12 helps a lot!

I'll feel good again

She's a weird cat... she won't eat chicken, beef, or other people food except deli turkey... only likes kibble and hard treats... but she's constipated so time to restrict her to wet food. I'll get her some baby food tomorrow. I don't want to spend a bunch of money on a vet removing impacted stuff from her bowels.


horn_of_plenty on 05/08/2022:
it's good to see you are up and ready for the day. i love long sleeps like you had!

i'm sure your mom is looking over you :)



happy-1 - Saturday May 07, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

 Sat 5-7-22 11:30am

Did the 6pm watch the news ritual with my dad. Was low on REM so dad got one in and I sank. He didn't like the meatloaf and told me to leave so I did. If I wasn't so tired, I'd have shrugged it off and gone to bed on time at 8 but instead I stayed up watching tv till 11 and had extra snacks. Woke up at 7:30 this morning, so not a bad slide. Totally recoverable and at least I got REM Rebound. Waiting for the rebound fog to clear so I can get started today.

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 05/07/2022:
Inch by inch

happy-1 on 05/07/2022:
1:30pm Went to the kitchen for a protein shake. Dad wants to know why I seem so down and low. I said I got stressed after yesterday, I’m not feeling so hot because my sugar is too high from being up late last night. I should feel good today and be able to do stuff, but I don’t. I said let’s give TV time a break over the weekends, pick up again on Monday. He says so I’m down because I’m mad at him for yesterday. I said I’m not mad it’s just who you are. You can’t control it any more than the sun or the moon. I’m just tired and I feel like crap. He exploded at that point. If I stay clear of him today I have a shot at sleep tonight.

happy-1 on 05/07/2022:
2:30 dad rang for me, I went in. I must look like hell because he got angry with me immediately. I just don’t feel good. Apparently his friend called to visit and he turned her down. I feel bad he skipped it but so glad to just lay here and recover.

happy-1 on 05/07/2022:
5pm - Dad wants me to go get him drive through. I’m a mess. Not happening. Not to mention there is a fridge full of food and we are both diabetic and horribly overweight. The solution is less fast food, not more!!!


bearcountrygg on 05/07/2022:
((HUGS))

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
Ty!!!



happy-1 - Friday May 06, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

 Fri 5-6-22 7:50am

I did it. I woke up at 4:45 with my alarm, took meds, spaced out a bit, hopped on coworking, got my head together, did pt, and went for a 45 min walk. I will work on tightening up the routine, but I did it. Grrr. Getting after it.

Shocker was that my body battery charged all the way to 93 last night. REM was light and did not bring my 7 day average up so I am still struggling. I am hoping that consolidating my sleep cycle will help with increasing REM sleep relative to duration.

BUT that means I am really wiped mentally and physically. And I still need to go grocery shopping and clean the entire house top to bottom. In theory my dad's friend is coming tomorrow, but I can't do it all by then.

And dad doesn't like the Jambalaya I made and it is chicken thighs, shrimp and brown rice, none of which I am supposed to eat... so F me. What do I do with it?

Augh.

Cool and thrifty low water container garden I saw on my walk this AM.

 

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 05/06/2022:
Inch by inch.

happy-1 on 05/06/2022:
I want my mom :(

happy-1 on 05/06/2022:
2:50. Tried making food, cleaning the kitchen but I am tired and dizzy. Might as well sit and watch tv, wait for tomorrow

happy-1 on 05/06/2022:
Had a chocolate protein shake even though I know it is more carbs than I can tolerate on top of the 12 cherries I had as a snack. I just had to have something sweet. I’ll pay for it in energy levels tomorrow.

6pm. So not into this new ritual of TV time with dad, but I’m here and doing it because I am physically able and he won’t be around forever. I made him a meatloaf. Maybe if I do this everyday, I will start enjoying it. Or hate it less. In any case at least I won’t have squandered an opportunity for some kind of relationship with my dad.

happy-1 on 05/06/2022:
6:18 Dad didn’t like the meatloaf. He got mad at himself then at me. Augh. Shoot me. Just shoot me.


bearcountrygg on 05/06/2022:
Cute little garden there. ((HUGS))

happy-1 on 05/08/2022:
Right? They painted all the containers the same color. Cute idea!!


Donkey on 05/07/2022:
I can see how you might acclimate to TV time with dad. I would do this with my Nana.

I'm sorry the Jambalaya and meat loaf didn't work out. That's tough when you put in all that effort and the end-product is rejected.


horn_of_plenty on 05/07/2022:
Nice work on getting into a routine. you ended the week on a high note!

i hope you freeze any extra shrimp jumbalya! i'd eat it in a quick second!

why can't you eat it? maybe just a little bit and a lot of veggies if you can get to the supermarket? it sure sounds GREAT.



happy-1 - Thursday May 05, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

Thurs 5-5-22 6:35am

How is it Thursday already?

How did I manage to fall asleep on time last night after a schedule disruption? I've never been able to do that before.

Why am I so tired and sluggish if I got a full night of sleep and my body battery charged to 85?

Chai is a treat this morning. I like the instant tea I found that is made from ground tea and not concerated flouridated water.

Saw a fairly horrifying post on Reddit sbout the upcoming downturn... lots of Internet babble, but still unnerving.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Superstonk/comments/uflzht/the_2022_real_estate_collapse_is_going_to_be/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

 

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
6:32am… here is why I am sluggish… not enough REM. Ugh!

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
Probably time to start using the cpap again although my right ear still hasn’t healed.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
Oh wait now I see it… I had 2:27 deep after a schedule disruption because deep sleep recovers first. So 0:55 rem last night is just a lump I have to take. Augh.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
7:30 am dad drama over something he had a right to be upset about, I fixed it, but the drama cycle has started. I am waiting for 8am to reschedule his appointment so I don’t have to drive today. Ugh.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
Everytime I interact with him I walk away feeling like the biggest jerk on the planet.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
Rescheduled his appointment.

8:20 just remembered I went for an afternoon walk to calm down after dad stressed me out and that probably impacted rem sleep as well.

Why can’t I just get things to work right???

Placing an Instacart order.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
8:36 am going through my habit checklist and I think my next step this week is to consolidate my sleep cycle by setting my alarm for 4:45am every day. I’ve been setting it for 6, but if I’m mostly falling asleep by 9:30, I can work on this now.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
10am… still waiting for the nurse so I can let her in then go for a walk.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
…. And SO TIRED I CAN’T THINK

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
12pm. Actually, not THAT tired. Must be the higher body battery and deep sleep? I'm doing chores and small things. Huh. Surprising.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
6:30 pm, made dad dinner and watched tv with him as promised. Actually it was supposed to be 6pm, but he was asleep.

7:15 took a shower

Was supposed to be in bed at 8, but news was depressing and I felt bad cutting it off at 7 (but have to set that boundary) so I watched extra masterpiece theater. 8:51 in bed. Tomorrow I start 5am coworking sessions and accountability to consolidate my sleep cycle and do PT while I am strongest. Wearing my workout pants to bed tonight.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
Lord, thank you for my dad, space to heal and Bobcat. Please watch over IP and DH.


Donkey on 05/05/2022:
When the next turndown comes around, we are going to use this opportunity to buy something affordable for Daughter. Rents are out of control, and right now, prices are just too high.

Lenders are the Devil.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
Yeah… that post made it sound like we are about to be Argentina


bearcountrygg on 05/05/2022:
Everything we thought we knew has now turned into something that can't even be imagined.....I heard a horror story yesterday about a guy who took his car to have an oil change.....a 19 year old employee who didn't know how to drive moved the car...which caused another employee to die...and the lawsuit is against THE CAR OWNER EVEN THOUGH HE HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT....because there are laws against suing the business or the person that couldn't drive that caused the accident......crazy town...life is changing in a very weird way.

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
How??? How is that even possible??? It’s insane and the defense will be financially crushing!


Maria7 on 05/05/2022:
Your instant tea sounds real good.


bearcountrygg on 05/05/2022:
I'm guessing that they will go after the car owners insurance and when they meet their max...then it will be up to the innocent car owner to pay the rest out of his pocket....

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
Hopefully the judge will dismiss the case


bearcountrygg on 05/05/2022:
https://www.fox2detroit.com/news/why-a-jeep-owner-is-sued-after-dealership-employee-was-killed-during-oil-change?utm_campaign=trueAnthem_manual&utm_medium=trueAnthem&utm_source=facebook&fbclid=IwAR0a-W7hrljeGFmuNaFQZTrbZYaBAUv7T2azBpvgwvO7_nK5-28SatZObCw


bearcountrygg on 05/05/2022:
The above addy is the story.......The insurance co apparently paid $100,000...The family wants 15 million.........it actually happened within miles from where we used to live.....

happy-1 on 05/05/2022:
What is the world coming to?


horn_of_plenty on 05/05/2022:
i've been falling asleep easily too...and like you sometimes getting up and wishing i could have slept even more!



happy-1 - Wednesday May 04, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

Wed 5-4-22 11:30am:

Home from a great night out with Bobcat. We had thai. I ordered a beef salad and chicken satay. Yum, but more fat than I have been eating and I was up all night. When he woke up well rested after a full night of sleep, I headed home right away to beat traffic and fell asleep in my own bed in 5 min. My body clock will be all over the place the next couple of days, but it was worth it. 

I planned today as a buffer day. Not sure where to start today. I'm more functional than usual... just lazy from being off schedule. Sugar is in range because I ate low carb for dinner last night.Body battery is 66... So really I could do anything I need to.

Like a normal person.

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 05/04/2022:
Inch by inch.

happy-1 on 05/04/2022:
1:20pm… looks like garmin didn’t record all my sleep last night… It missed I slept 4:30am-9:30 am

I feel normal but I sure am aimless. Dad wants to talk about business. I just want to sit here and watch TV. It’s like I scheduled a buffer day and because that’s what I planned, that’s all I can do.

happy-1 on 05/04/2022:
2pm… still shocked at feeling normal. I don’t know what to do with myself. I guess I’ll go grocery shopping.

Wait… it’s 2pm. Did I really just say that??? Omg… when was the last time I had that kind of energy.

Wait… now I remember. I host coworking in an hour

happy-1 on 05/04/2022:
Clearly the cat missed me. I’m supposed to let her sleep on me, but not pet her. Mixed signals, cat!

happy-1 on 05/04/2022:
Nobody showed for 3-4pm coworking.

4pm facing dad drama

happy-1 on 05/04/2022:
Walked 40 minutes Ate sort of healthy Turned off tv at 8 In bed on time. Splitting headache, wiped. My legs and hips hurt. No idea why.

Thank you Lord for my dad, space to heal, Bobcat, DD. Please help me get restorative sleep with REM tonight so that I can keep going. I’m trying so hard, I swear.


bearcountrygg on 05/04/2022:
I'm glad to hear that you had a night out........Your dinner sounds delish!!!

happy-1 on 05/04/2022:
Having someone to have fun with makes all the difference.


Jacky82020 on 05/04/2022:
I love Thai. Haven’t found any good places since we left San Diego though

happy-1 on 05/04/2022:
Tradeoffs of leaving big cities. I mastered Indian food and Mexican food to never be without.


Jacky82020 on 05/04/2022:
I’ll take my 7 wooded acres & the 4 seasons over San Diego any time! Never much cared for San Diego, greatly preferred Santa Cruz and the SF Bay Area. Husband’s job transferred to SD & he was tired of the commute to the Silicon Valley. I liked the idea of many open teaching positions in SD.

I can do some Mexican cooking, Italian & Chinese. But rarely do these days.

happy-1 on 05/04/2022:
I agree!


Donkey on 05/05/2022:
(((hugs))) I hope you get some REM too. And I'm so happy to hear that you had a good time with Bobcat :-)



happy-1 - Tuesday May 03, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

 Tues 5/3/22 9:20 am:

Pausing after waking up late, scrambling to get a walk in, therapy call. It's good to stop and breathe.

Realized this morning looking at my to do list that ithe better sleep and higher body battery doubled my functional hours to perform tasks from 1-2 hours to 3-4 hours and that they aren't all crowded at the start of the day... I was able to do stuff in the morning, take a break, and do errands in the afternoon. Big change.

Yay!

The walk I squeezed in yesterday kept my training zone up but gave me an hour of insomnia, and lower REM. During the hour of insomnia I ate 2 string cheeses, keto crackers, almonds and seltzer. Still, my sugar stayed in range, even if I didn't get it closer to the 100s. Still proud. Showing it off here.

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 05/03/2022:
Inch by inch. So much to do today.


bearcountrygg on 05/03/2022:
You are doing GREAT!!! Keep it up.....resting in between tasks is just fine.....pacing yourself!!!


Jacky82020 on 05/03/2022:
What Bear says!


horn_of_plenty on 05/03/2022:
seems many of us got walks in today! very nice!


Donkey on 05/04/2022:
Bravo!!!! I hope you had a good day Tuesday.


Maria7 on 05/04/2022:
Wishing you a nice Wednesday!



happy-1 - Monday May 02, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

Mon 5-2-22 10:20am

Inch by inch. Pebble by pebble. I will move the mountain.

Confetti should have spontaneously burst from the ceiling and started a party, I did so many things right last week. EMF thing paid off so far.

  • I consistently went to bed at 8 and fell asleep easily. Both nights I woke up with nightmares I did eventually get back to sleep
  • I meal prepped and got my sugar under control by the end of the week without adding extra medication
  • My Body Battery consistently charged a bit higher than usual
  • I did paperwork 2 days in a row
  • Last Monday and today, I did my hair and makeup, put on real clothes. I also at some point did my nails... no polish, just a tidy
  • I got a bunch of walks in and a couple of PT sessions in. I raised my training zone 2 days in a row, and figured out that in the first couple of days it goes up, if you don't keep it up it drops back down. Ugh! They could put a message about that in there!
  • I identified that I also need to pay attention to my recovery bank in the morning
  • I researched buying a Garmin, narrowed down the model I want and that I want to see if there are any sales for Memorial Day before I take the plunge.
  • I made plans for one fun thing with Bobcat

All in all, a good start to the week. 

I know the stats bore everyone, but I just want to show this off. I was 63% in range yesterday with just the one Glipizide in the morning and a second one for emergency rescue if I miscalculate... I took one after the spike in the evening for the blueberries and granola. I'm incredibly proud of this because I'm pulling off what the endocrinologist said I wouldn't be able to do without additional meds. 


 

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
Inch by inch.

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
Unfortunately I gained 2lbs, but I will doublecheck tomorrow.

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
11:30am... Having problems getting started today. Nobody showed for my coworking session I hosted at 9am. 7 people logged in at 11. Oh well.

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
Trying not to feel bad about that

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
12pm still can’t get started. Probably the REM rebound hangover combined with the early morning emergency defrost of the freezer.

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
30m bedrest

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
Oh duh, just checked Garmin Body Battery. I am wiped because I dropped 30 points in 3 hours. No wonder I feel knocked on my butt. I have no stamina (ironically measured on the Fenix 7).

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
12:50 feeling better

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
6:30pm. Did errands for dad, came home, made him dinner. Took a 30min walk which spiked my sugar but kept my training zone up for tomorrow. Next is a shower and bedtime. I would really like a salad, blueberries or keto cookies, but my sugar is right at 140 right now so I will have to be happy with seltzer and rotisserie chicken. Augh.

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
8pm. Power off. In bed. Took melatonin an hour late, oops.

Made a plan to watch the news with dad every night at 6. Why not. Maybe it will make me 1% less of an ****.

Lord, thank you for my dad, space to heal, Bobcat, my mom’s friends and Mama Cat. Please help me get restorative sleep tonight with the right mix of REM and deep. Pease help me watch tv with dad without the usual family drama and still get to sleep after.


bearcountrygg on 05/02/2022:
Good work Happy...You are knocking it out of the park and figuring out what works for you!!!! YEAH!!!

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
Inch by inch. Omg. Ty for all your suport.


horn_of_plenty on 05/02/2022:
i prefer tidying my nails to any polish. polish i get bad reactions from and weakens my nails too much.

you've come a LONG way with all these changes, like Bear says.

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
Sometimes I buff them, maybe I will do that tomorrow. I used to polish them all the time, but it’s too much work right now.

So many changes. It’s scary when you get better health advice from Reddit than your doctor.


Donkey on 05/03/2022:
I think that's a pretty darn great start to the week!

I noticed that after yoga last night, my body battery had increased by 5 points. Cool!

happy-1 on 05/03/2022:
That would make sense if it was restorative or yin. It would have reduced cortisol and lowered HRV for a higher body battery in the AM



happy-1 - Sunday May 01, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

Sun 5-1-22 7:45am:

I was pretty sure I'd have terrible insomnia last night, (ate too close to bed) but I turned off the tv on time, flipped off the electric, and went to bed. I used a great sleepcast podcast to meditate, and dropped off to slumberland on time at 9. I kept my body battery above 12. My sugar was a lot better. It SHOULD have translated into a perfect REM night... but no. 

Ugh. Just ugh. I am going to be hating life in a couple of hours. Zombie day today and if I get REM rebound tonight, a zombie day tomorrow. Aaaaaargh!

Possibly it was the sleepcast on autoplay all night. It was still going when I woke up. Pulse ox and respiration were fine so probably not sleep apnea. Maybe the headphone angle? Or the hotdogs???

Recovery bank is down to 6 hours. My body battery charged into the 80s... My AM sugar is better... So... getting there. 

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 05/01/2022:
Inch by inch.

happy-1 on 05/01/2022:
Ate same meal pattern as yesterday. Running out of meals though. Not sure what to do about that.

happy-1 on 05/01/2022:
10am. Dad wants me to go over transactions. My brain is so foggy from poor quality sleep I don’t have the emotional bandwidth for it. Asked him to print it out and circle the ones to look up. Why can’t I be on top of all of this? Why is it taking so long for me to get better? The blood sugar control, consistent sleep schedule, higher body battery charge were all huge wins this week and I should be feeling really good about them and instead I just feel like this huge ****.

happy-1 on 05/01/2022:
11am. Back from 40 min walk. Stay focused. Keep on the habits. Wiggle through. Maintain sleep hygiene.

The other big win I had this week with the electric off is that I start yawning at 8pm and can remember to go to bed. I don’t know how many years it has been since I yawned at bedtime.

happy-1 on 05/01/2022:
12:29, just finished meal prepping tofu scrambles for the week. Really feeling the lack of rem sleep. Like my head is in a fog.

happy-1 on 05/01/2022:
2:30 pm. Just finished making a giant pot of chicken bok choy soup. Food for the week that is restorative. If I last that long. It feels like 7pm already. Shouldn’t I be showering and going to bed? Nowhere near that time? Ugh.

happy-1 on 05/01/2022:
4:40… dying for a sweet treat, which would mean baking and/or driving up my sugar. Ugh. Neither are a good option.

I really thought that getting consistent sleep and lower sugar would be this magic point where I’d feel so much better but… meh. Not so much apparently. I’m not really feeling up to doing much of anything fun.

happy-1 on 05/01/2022:
7:15 supposed to shower, but dad is asleep in the bathroom

happy-1 on 05/01/2022:
I mean really… after a week like this shouldn’t there have been confetti and a party?

8. In bed. No electric. Turned off autoplay on spotify. Sugar is starting to drop into range after the blueberries (ugh). Body battery is at 22…

Lord, thank you for my dad, space to heal, Bobcat still being here. Please help me get 8h restorative sleep with enough deep and REM again like last Monday.



happy-1 - Saturday Apr 30, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

 4-30-22 7:45am:

Yesterday I managed to walk 15 min, sort papers, do 2 errands. I also wore myself out and reduced sleep quality... so light on REM... BUT I did manage to get my sugar down overnight and this AM... heading towards the hundreds for fasting. Now I just need to not exhaust myself to avoid unplanned eating and keep it down. Still an hour to go on my 14h fast and I am super hungry. 

I was up at 5 but laid in bed 2h to raise my body battery 10 points and give myself a shot at keeping sugar down and getting quality sleep tonight. Not great sleep hygeine but a nice long walk and an errand will help with that.

 

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
Inch by inch

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
Stuck out my 14h fast. Ate chili and a granola bar for breakfast.

9:30 am… How am I already tired??

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
I really miss coffee. New instant iced tea mix doesn’t have the kick. It’s ground tea leaves to avoid fluoride concentrate in Lipton iced tea, tastes fine… but no oomph.

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
Also out of snacks. Except for granola bars. Augh. I have the keto cookie cravings!!!

11:00 figured out that I took IR meds too close to a meal and they didn’t kick in. Lying down for an hour while I wait. I could have caffeine but it’s too late in the day.

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
11:30 just realized I should send a mothers day card out to mom’s friend. Need to get off my butt

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
12 - IR meds.

12:30 quest pizza… 3.50 less at Target!!! Ate the whole thing. Let’s see if it actually does lower my blood sugar.

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
2:30, back from 30m walk.

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
3pm. Just realized that I am worn out because of recovery hour bank… 22 hours. I keep forgetting to look at that because it’s on the watch not Garmin Connect.

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
3:30... I dunno if it's the walk or realizing my recovery bank is high, but I am feeling better and hopping into coworking lab. Doing morning pages and then starting paperwork

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
Inch by inch. Pebble by pebble. I did 2.5 hours of paperwork. Second day in a row. THAT is a sign I am doing better. Then I made dad porkchops and washed dishes. Mine was small and i was still hungry so I steamed hot dogs and zucchini. I ate too close to bed. I may be up a while tonight… but somehow I have done enough to raise my training zone.

Lord, thank you for my dad, space to heal, and the high body battery today. Please help me get restorative sleep tonight. I’m really trying.


Donkey on 04/30/2022:
Whoa, look at that body battery!!!!! And you did well for your blood sugar levels. Very well, done! A good start for the day!!!

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
It pays to experiment and persevere.

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
And ty for your support!


bearcountrygg on 04/30/2022:
You still got some things done........Happy to see that you were able to control the sugar.

happy-1 on 05/02/2022:
Inch by inch. Pebble by pebble. I will do this.


horn_of_plenty on 04/30/2022:
yeah, when i'm exhausted i may get into unplanned eating too! i'm so glad i have a fresh cooking chicken soup in the slow cooker again today :) will have some for dinner!

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
Yum!!!! I love how industrious you are and relentless at staying on top of things.



happy-1 - Friday Apr 29, 2022
(Walk 15 min and do PT daily. Regular meal prep.)
Weight: 248.7

Friday 4-29-22 9am

Starting today with one foot in a cement bucket... not enough sleep. It was a hard night. I fell asleep on time no problem (8:30pm) but I had a nightmare that I wasn't getting any better, I had to call APS for my dad, and nobody would hire me. I woke up at 10pm. I tried everything to get back to sleep, more melatonin, string cheese, a couple of pieces of raisin toast I definitely should not have had. Finally at 1 am I took a shower since dad was up anyway and I finally fell back asleep at 2am. I set my alarm for 7 and got 5 hours of sleep. I guess God heard me because I got enough REM that it wasn't a crisis and a body battery charge of 60 so I can do basic things today without ruining my sleep. (I'm pretty sure this higher charge is due to turning off the electric to my bedroom at night. Thinking about doing that for any time not spent with the computer on as well.) My 1:15 walk last week fell off my 7 day load so there is plenty of space for me to do my full PT routine today. I can do this. I even got a bit of a windfall in that dad didn't get any sleep, so he is rescheduling his appointment for next week. I don't have to burn myself out. I just need to stay calm because as I went out to do the AM routine with him, not fully awake because I slept in 1h, he hit me with anxieties over money and spending. I'm not quite across the line on enough quality sleep banked to do paperwork... I could pull off minor errands and driving, but not an in depth account and statement review... like Sunday, I think I can totally do that. Just need 2 or 3 more solid nights of sleep and lower sugar.

I wish I hadn't eaten the raisin toast. Next time I will shower instead. I need to stay out of the dad treats. Ugh.

Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!

happy-1 on 04/29/2022:
Inch by inch.

happy-1 on 04/29/2022:
10:20, got my 15 min walk in… I also did trash barrels and getting breakfast in order. Tofu hasn’t drained enough yet to make a scramble… oops. I will need to drain it another day I guess. Heating up chili that was supposed to be lunch while doing 30 min of bedrest.

happy-1 on 04/29/2022:
More functional than expected today. I made a meal plan, ordered a couple of missing grocery items for pickup at target, paid 2 bills, postponed my jury service... 3:15pm and still cranking.

happy-1 on 04/29/2022:
4pm. "Toast" mentally. Dad is just getting warmed up. Opposite chronotypes. Still have errands at 5, but a 30 min break to lie down is essential.

happy-1 on 04/29/2022:
7:30 Talked to a friend tonight about how to pray, i meant how does she remember the list, but was too tired to keep it going.

8pm yawning… must be time to go to bed. Turned off the tv. Reminded dad to take meds. Went to bed. No luck! 8:40 still awake. Ugh!!!!

Dear Lord, thank you for my dad, space to heal and the 5h of effective sleep I got last night. Please help me get restorative sleep tonight. I’m really trying hard.


bearcountrygg on 04/29/2022:
When you had the nightmare...It was a good thing to shower and possibly eat...it does break that nightmare feeling up so that you didn't go back and finish that bad dream......glad you were able to get past that.

happy-1 on 04/29/2022:
Hugs. Ty.


Donkey on 04/30/2022:
(((hugs))) I bet it was a quite a relief that the doctor's appointment was postponed. It will be interesting to see if sleep is an issue the night before the rescheduled appointment. Perhaps it is something you are both dreading.

A 60 body battery is not that bad. Not great, but doable for the day, I supposed depending on the day. I think you did quite well.

happy-1 on 04/30/2022:
Inch by inch. It’s a little like pushing a boulder up a hill in a cartoon… getting flattened, getting back up.



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