Tues 5-10-22 11am
Ugh. Got so hooked on Poldark on Masterpiece Theater I accidentally stayed up till 2 am and didn't fall asleep till 3:30am. That's on my bad habits, and also because I didn't have my alarm clock in view. I slept till 11am.
At least I finally feel like I've had enough REM sleep. Good day to do errands, so that's something.
Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!
Monday 5-9-22 8:40am
Back from my walk. On a morning where I woke up completely down and defeated... The new sweats made it a lot easier to just get up and go for a walk. Inch by inch, pebble by pebble, I will turn this all around.
Very tired. Was up till almost 1. Sugar was high overnight. I feel like crap.
Need to host coworking. I should go grocery shopping but I can't face it.
Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!
Sun 5-8-22 7:40am
Happy Mother's Day to all the moms!
I miss my mom.
Shake it off.
Somehow despite lying around like a sloth yesterday, or because of it, I dozed off at 8:30 while running the AC before bed. Oops. I not only didn't turn off the electric, I ran up the bill. At leat I got up at 2 and turned it off. Augh. I slept 10 hours and got a ton of REM. The cat kept checking to make sure I am still breathing. She would definitely eat me if I wasn't. She is not happy with this switch to wet food we are doing and has stuck her mouse in the middle of her plate, like a cake topper.
Time to go for a walk and do something worthwhile with my day. One day of just giving up and lying there was a necessary sacrifice. 2 leads to depression.
Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!
Told dad I'd make pancakes for lunch. He got hopeful I went grocery shopping, I said no I planned ahead for Mother's Day.
9:41 still up watching tv. Do I know better? Yes.
I'll feel good again
She's a weird cat... she won't eat chicken, beef, or other people food except deli turkey... only likes kibble and hard treats... but she's constipated so time to restrict her to wet food. I'll get her some baby food tomorrow. I don't want to spend a bunch of money on a vet removing impacted stuff from her bowels.
i'm sure your mom is looking over you :)
Sat 5-7-22 11:30am
Did the 6pm watch the news ritual with my dad. Was low on REM so dad got one in and I sank. He didn't like the meatloaf and told me to leave so I did. If I wasn't so tired, I'd have shrugged it off and gone to bed on time at 8 but instead I stayed up watching tv till 11 and had extra snacks. Woke up at 7:30 this morning, so not a bad slide. Totally recoverable and at least I got REM Rebound. Waiting for the rebound fog to clear so I can get started today.
Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!
Fri 5-6-22 7:50am
I did it. I woke up at 4:45 with my alarm, took meds, spaced out a bit, hopped on coworking, got my head together, did pt, and went for a 45 min walk. I will work on tightening up the routine, but I did it. Grrr. Getting after it.
Shocker was that my body battery charged all the way to 93 last night. REM was light and did not bring my 7 day average up so I am still struggling. I am hoping that consolidating my sleep cycle will help with increasing REM sleep relative to duration.
BUT that means I am really wiped mentally and physically. And I still need to go grocery shopping and clean the entire house top to bottom. In theory my dad's friend is coming tomorrow, but I can't do it all by then.
And dad doesn't like the Jambalaya I made and it is chicken thighs, shrimp and brown rice, none of which I am supposed to eat... so F me. What do I do with it?
Augh.
Cool and thrifty low water container garden I saw on my walk this AM.
Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!
6pm. So not into this new ritual of TV time with dad, but I’m here and doing it because I am physically able and he won’t be around forever. I made him a meatloaf. Maybe if I do this everyday, I will start enjoying it. Or hate it less. In any case at least I won’t have squandered an opportunity for some kind of relationship with my dad.
I'm sorry the Jambalaya and meat loaf didn't work out. That's tough when you put in all that effort and the end-product is rejected.
i hope you freeze any extra shrimp jumbalya! i'd eat it in a quick second!
why can't you eat it? maybe just a little bit and a lot of veggies if you can get to the supermarket? it sure sounds GREAT.
Thurs 5-5-22 6:35am
How is it Thursday already?
How did I manage to fall asleep on time last night after a schedule disruption? I've never been able to do that before.
Why am I so tired and sluggish if I got a full night of sleep and my body battery charged to 85?
Chai is a treat this morning. I like the instant tea I found that is made from ground tea and not concerated flouridated water.
Saw a fairly horrifying post on Reddit sbout the upcoming downturn... lots of Internet babble, but still unnerving.
Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!
8:20 just remembered I went for an afternoon walk to calm down after dad stressed me out and that probably impacted rem sleep as well.
Why can’t I just get things to work right???
Placing an Instacart order.
7:15 took a shower
Was supposed to be in bed at 8, but news was depressing and I felt bad cutting it off at 7 (but have to set that boundary) so I watched extra masterpiece theater. 8:51 in bed. Tomorrow I start 5am coworking sessions and accountability to consolidate my sleep cycle and do PT while I am strongest. Wearing my workout pants to bed tonight.
Lenders are the Devil.
Wed 5-4-22 11:30am:
Home from a great night out with Bobcat. We had thai. I ordered a beef salad and chicken satay. Yum, but more fat than I have been eating and I was up all night. When he woke up well rested after a full night of sleep, I headed home right away to beat traffic and fell asleep in my own bed in 5 min. My body clock will be all over the place the next couple of days, but it was worth it.
I planned today as a buffer day. Not sure where to start today. I'm more functional than usual... just lazy from being off schedule. Sugar is in range because I ate low carb for dinner last night.Body battery is 66... So really I could do anything I need to.
Like a normal person.
Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!
I feel normal but I sure am aimless. Dad wants to talk about business. I just want to sit here and watch TV. It’s like I scheduled a buffer day and because that’s what I planned, that’s all I can do.
Wait… it’s 2pm. Did I really just say that??? Omg… when was the last time I had that kind of energy.
Wait… now I remember. I host coworking in an hour
Thank you Lord for my dad, space to heal, Bobcat, DD. Please help me get restorative sleep with REM tonight so that I can keep going. I’m trying so hard, I swear.
I can do some Mexican cooking, Italian & Chinese. But rarely do these days.
Tues 5/3/22 9:20 am:
Pausing after waking up late, scrambling to get a walk in, therapy call. It's good to stop and breathe.
Realized this morning looking at my to do list that ithe better sleep and higher body battery doubled my functional hours to perform tasks from 1-2 hours to 3-4 hours and that they aren't all crowded at the start of the day... I was able to do stuff in the morning, take a break, and do errands in the afternoon. Big change.
Yay!
The walk I squeezed in yesterday kept my training zone up but gave me an hour of insomnia, and lower REM. During the hour of insomnia I ate 2 string cheeses, keto crackers, almonds and seltzer. Still, my sugar stayed in range, even if I didn't get it closer to the 100s. Still proud. Showing it off here.
Progress as of today: 68.3 lbs lost so far, only 88.7 lbs to go!
Mon 5-2-22 10:20am
Inch by inch. Pebble by pebble. I will move the mountain.
Confetti should have spontaneously burst from the ceiling and started a party, I did so many things right last week. EMF thing paid off so far.
All in all, a good start to the week.
I know the stats bore everyone, but I just want to show this off. I was 63% in range yesterday with just the one Glipizide in the morning and a second one for emergency rescue if I miscalculate... I took one after the spike in the evening for the blueberries and granola. I'm incredibly proud of this because I'm pulling off what the endocrinologist said I wouldn't be able to do without additional meds.
Made a plan to watch the news with dad every night at 6. Why not. Maybe it will make me 1% less of an ****.
Lord, thank you for my dad, space to heal, Bobcat, my mom’s friends and Mama Cat. Please help me get restorative sleep tonight with the right mix of REM and deep. Pease help me watch tv with dad without the usual family drama and still get to sleep after.
you've come a LONG way with all these changes, like Bear says.
So many changes. It’s scary when you get better health advice from Reddit than your doctor.
I noticed that after yoga last night, my body battery had increased by 5 points. Cool!
Sun 5-1-22 7:45am:
I was pretty sure I'd have terrible insomnia last night, (ate too close to bed) but I turned off the tv on time, flipped off the electric, and went to bed. I used a great sleepcast podcast to meditate, and dropped off to slumberland on time at 9. I kept my body battery above 12. My sugar was a lot better. It SHOULD have translated into a perfect REM night... but no.
Ugh. Just ugh. I am going to be hating life in a couple of hours. Zombie day today and if I get REM rebound tonight, a zombie day tomorrow. Aaaaaargh!
Possibly it was the sleepcast on autoplay all night. It was still going when I woke up. Pulse ox and respiration were fine so probably not sleep apnea. Maybe the headphone angle? Or the hotdogs???
Recovery bank is down to 6 hours. My body battery charged into the 80s... My AM sugar is better... So... getting there.
The other big win I had this week with the electric off is that I start yawning at 8pm and can remember to go to bed. I don’t know how many years it has been since I yawned at bedtime.
I really thought that getting consistent sleep and lower sugar would be this magic point where I’d feel so much better but… meh. Not so much apparently. I’m not really feeling up to doing much of anything fun.
8. In bed. No electric. Turned off autoplay on spotify. Sugar is starting to drop into range after the blueberries (ugh). Body battery is at 22…
Lord, thank you for my dad, space to heal, Bobcat still being here. Please help me get 8h restorative sleep with enough deep and REM again like last Monday.
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Inch by inch.
horn_of_plenty on 05/10/2022:
lol to masterpiece theater on channel 13 !!! :) good for you. i haven't heard of Poldark tho, but i'm guessing its historic..
I’m doing the PBS subscription on Amazon Prime… It’s bottomless Masterpiece Theater. I’ve never felt so old and white.
bearcountrygg on 05/10/2022:
I'm afraid I would have fallen asleep in the chir and woke up in the morning...LOL
That would actually have worked out great! I can’t nod off in a chair unless I am sick.
Donkey on 05/11/2022:
Ah, "Poldark" - I was wondering which Masterpiece Theater show you were hooked on. I never started this show, probably because I know I'd be hooked. The main actor, Aidan Turner, I've seen him in other shows, and he's dreamy.
I hope you have a good day today. I drained my body battery down to 15 last night and thought of you! (lol)
15 isn't too bad, but you'll feel a ton better if you can keep it at least that every night. 25 is better.