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horn_of_plenty - Friday Sep 11, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

ate a late breakfast again today. i think i want to start doing this occasionally a few times a week. makes for a better morning, less cravings, and knowing that i will just eat once and not think about eating again until lunchtime. that is a VERY good thing, to not have to think about eating again until lunch.

breakfast: 370

lunch: 600 healthy, but sodium filled. salad w. different sweet peppers (the vinegered type), bean salad, other stuff.  bag of butter flavor popcorn, HUGE mostly decaf coffee....gave me a rush for sure anyway!

snack: diet drinks galore throughout the day, as per usual. and then a light muscle milk protein bar. 170.

total so far: 1140

dinner: haha, will be late, will be starbucks! yeah, a small bday treat with a couple friends and the movies. nothing huge to celebrate this year and that is totally fine by me. 350 or so

total today: not more than 1500! :)

exercise: it's so late already, 6:30...but i'll go on the elliptical for about 45 min.

 

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!


horn_of_plenty - Thursday Sep 10, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

5:23pm edit: I gave blood today, with no advance notice, and am doing good! It was my THIRD time and finally I understand the importance of eating well before and after.  Meaning, do NOT severely restrict calories or sugar when you give blood!

breakfast: i actually didn't eat at home, picked up dunkin donuts eggwhite flatbread turkey sausage and huge tea 350 (and this worked out perfectly for when i gave blood an hour later after eating!!)

snack: after giving blood, cookies 140, juice 70 total 210

lunch: chips and veggie patty sandwich at subway 500

snack: starbucks light blended drink: around 200

dinner: I will NOT restrict today.  although, i am i the mood for something healthy, at this moment...so healthy 500 cal. :)

total cal: 1760 and i am overjoyed with my success today.

exercise: weights and 15 min cardio. some abs. :) just lovely and what i needed.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

LOL. i soooo cannot sleep. Mr. Florida did in fact contact me and all is now well on that note...

i need to sleep bc it's going to cause bad eating...however, with this new goal of Nov. 14th, i think i can seriously overcome my emotions and not stuff myself with food tomorrow. i know i can, but i realize it may NOT be easy!

breakfast: can't even think about it at 3:01am now...

snack: 

lunch: 

snack: 

dinner: 

exercise: 

 

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

mskitty on 09/10/2009:
I know I shouldn't be eating 1200cals a day which I sorta stated in my post. Its stupid and a lot of girls get sucked into that number. I am aware of the starvation mode our body has. I was just stating its what others say. (as silly as it is) The truth is I am confused because even 1800cals is too low. So I was looking for a higher number. Whats a good number between 1800cals to 2300cals. I am doing lots of exercise. Its confusing because so many hype diets and what not sorta muddle the true numbers women with high activity levels should be in taking each day. Its frustrating.


kzirkle on 09/10/2009:
Thanks, you too! I have a HUGE sweet tooth so honey is an easy way for me to get just a hint of sweetness without overindulging and going too far. Just a spoonful will do it. OK, have a good day today! :) You can do it.


lafemme_loca on 09/10/2009:
Thanks ! Yeah, the red velvet bar is a new one point bar from Weight Watchers which you can get at meetings... Soooooooo goooooood ! I am happy with just having one at a time rather than the mint crisp ones or the peanut butter bliss ones which make you want to sit and eat the whole box... :-) Yum ! :-) I hope you had a rockin' birthday !!! :-)


mskitty on 09/10/2009:
You are sounding really positive. The foods looking good and you seem to be well on your way to reaching your goals good for you.


lafemme_loca on 09/11/2009:
:) The last time I gave blood, I passed out due to not eating well... oye ! Not good. I haven't tried to give blood since. heehee...


Donkey on 09/11/2009:
A good day for you!



horn_of_plenty - Wednesday Sep 09, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

edit:

i doubt mr. florida will call me to wish me a happy bday. I will be SO BUMMED if he doesn't. but moreso if my own sister forgets. and she SO WILL, unless someone tells her. totally not cool.  when it's her bday, 9/20/09 you can bet i will not forget and i will AT LEAST text her in the morning. gosh!  lol.

if mr. florida forgets, well, i will be so upset. first of all, i'm friends with him on facebook , maybe he'll check that.  idk, if i knew it were his bday, which i can check on facebook, i would certainly wish him a very happy bday.  if he doesn't, i'm texting him tomorrrow probably.

on another note, i must stay as positive as possible as it is NOT easy to keep a diet, not binge, until November 14th...and then hopefully onward, to reach my goal this year, 115.  I'd love to reach it  by Christmas.  I have a major party to go to for my school and the entire hospital radiology department. 

ok, progress so far!

early breakfast 5:45 : 340 cal

10am bday bagel breakfast which i enjoyed: 550

late snack: nuts:

snack 2: ices

total so far 1320

late dinner: microwavable 400, dessert 500

total cal: 2220, good.

exercise: 5 miles.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

up an hour early to study at school...haha, let me get off this computer then!

breakfast: NASTY and GROSS. coffee yogurt 90, and such a completely disgusting microwave breakfast sandwich, never again! blech! 200, coffee 50 total: 340 grossness.

snack: do i have to think about it now?

lunch: bday cake probably...and a yogurt....salad beforehand? lol. who knows.

i will have to work HARD not to binge today. I have a wedding to go to Nov. 14th. I want to be 120 lbs or less. :)  (right now i probably weigh in the upper 130s)

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

loveray on 09/09/2009:
happy bday!! xoxo


grumpy on 09/09/2009:
happy bday!! men forget about bdays, i do too, but men always do. if he does, maybe just txt him tonight, so he still has time to wish you a happy bday! anyway i need to catch up on your story with him xoxo


Donkey on 09/09/2009:
****HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!**** Woo-hoo!!! Are you an even number or an odd number this year? Even, right? 28 was a good year for me :-)

I don't know if I should even say anything about Mr. Florida. Let me just say, that if he does NOT call, I do NOT want to be reading about how you BINGED because of someone ELSE's actions -- or INactions, rather.


kzirkle on 09/09/2009:
Happy Birthday! :)



horn_of_plenty - Tuesday Sep 08, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

I have a wedding to go to in November. And my goal is 120 lbs or less by that wedding, November 14 i think.  It's one of my very best friends from college and i love her dearly. we don't see each other much for she is in another state.  I am very excited and happy for her. and i would HATE to see myself with her in such a happy moment all bloated up with extra weight. No freakin way. I NEED to look put together at this wedding. It is very, very important to me. YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

a wedding, two months. 120 lbs or less. that is all....

Breakfast: cereal and soy milk and coffee 350

snack: sucking candies yeah, not the best. 100

lunch: 2 pcs bread toasted 220, with  tofu heated up on top 100, yogurt 90, large tea w. milk and equal.

snack: large bowl of cereal, yogurt, diet root beer. 400

total so far: 1310. fine by me.

dinner: microwavable meal and 2 cucumbers w. dressing, maybe also a kombucha 450

total: 1760. *very* happy with this number...progress is my goal right now. and 1760 = progress.

exercise: EVERYTHING. I walk to the gym and back, did some elliptical 15 minutes worth, and did weights, finally! 30 minutes or so of weights. was WONDERFUL!  i like weights, and i need to get a pattern going.....because....

I have a wedding to go to in November which I am VERY excited for. One of my best friends from college! :)

I can definitely do this by November. This is the ULTIMATE goal....2 Months is nothing! it's so easy...just 2 months from now.

so my plan: 

not to give up on weights, at least 2X a week minimum.

i just will not binge. no matter what. no more than 2,000 cal per day.

keep up the cardio, at least 2 or 3 miles per day.

to do this once and for all. no more stalling.

weight i'd like to achieve for the wedding 120 or less.  That's it. I need this.  120 or less.

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

mskitty on 09/08/2009:
Good for you. You'll get there.



horn_of_plenty - Sunday Sep 06, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

Labor Day Monday:

BREAKFAST:  3 CUPS OF SWEET CEREAL 630 (NOT THAT I BOUGHT) WITH ONE LOUSY CUP SOY MILK 60 AND A LARGE PEACH. I AM JUST DOOMED. 800 CAL. RIGHT THERE..

snack: pineapple 50

lunch: pepper 50, sandwich 200

snack: pineapple 50

dinner: microwave meal 400, red pepper 50, yogurt 150, tofu 200. total: 800.

total: 1950. blah. at least no real binge or screw up today.

I NEED HELP.

MONDAY EXERCISE BEFORE BEACH: 4 MI, 3 JOGGING AND 1 WALKING, evening: 2.5 miles.

but if i look at my weightloss chart, i've been losing weight since May. Of course, I've gained about 5 lbs back, I refuse to get on a scale to check that out but i know its true.

but, I have lost steam and for no good reason.  I was doing well, there's no reason I can't keep doing well. yes, it'll be challenging. but it also can be done. and as for the binging, it's even more important i work on it too, i know.  lately, what was working, is when i let myself eat not as healthy as i think i need to.  whenever i get on too much of a health kick, i almost always binge with bad things. yeah, i know that didn't make a whole lot of sense. but that's what i've been seeing.  who knows anymore.

off to the beach, thank god.  this weekend was very upsetting. i really didn't make any other plans other than today with my friend and i was bored.  of course, i went to visit my grandmother during the day yesterday and get loads of exercise in, but i was still dissatisfied and upset for a good portion of the weekend. i think i'm PMSing. .

 

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

sunday update: 

yogurt150, pretzels240, cereal 420w. soy milk60, cereal 630and yogurt140, sorbet 320 = 1960.  this was done at 1am. I couldn't sleep. terrible!

total calories today: 4100. wow.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

wow, time is flying! do you guys feel that way!? i guess as we get older, time seems to move quicker...

breakfast: large coffee 50,  1 ice cream sandwich 140, yogurt 150, jello 60: ...hmm, what did i forget!? arg...not sure..i'm gonna put down 400  (i hope i only had one ice cream sandwich - i can't seem to remember!)

snack: ice cream sandwich, yogurt: 240

total so far: 640.

snack: 100 cal pudding/yogurt

lunch: 420: fruit, yogurts galore.

dinner: with grandma, some bbq stuff. i was actually happy about it bc i had chicken and a burger lol...and i haven't had meat for quite some time...i feel i was eating all carbs this past month, especially past two weeks so dinner was a good change of pace tonight.  800 cal dinner.

late snack: soy chips and drinks: 140.

total cal: 2100. ok. i did walk 8 miles again, so alright.

avg cal: 2324 over the past 38 days.

exercise: approx. 8 miles. 4 in morning and 3.5 or 4 in the evening! :)

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

mskitty on 09/06/2009:
ha ha ice cream for breaky. Nice size walk good for you keep up the good work.


loveray on 09/07/2009:
its been very relaxing but too short. i have been good for the most part but have had some wine and a couple of tastes of "sugar"- few cookies and a bite of some key lime pie. i am really trying to detox from sugar until halloween- its gonna be a big challenge!! xoxo


Donkey on 09/07/2009:
Biscotti has some pretty good words there.

You are not "DOOMED". Please don't think that way. Just make the next meal lighter. It doesn't even have to be healthier, necessarily. Just a little less, perhaps.

I'm sorry you had a bad weekend. I know you were looking forward to just relaxing and having time for yourself. There's nothing wrong with that.

I encourage you to weigh yourself soon. Something about the whole denial aspect sits uncomfortably with me. Take care of yourself. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you.


mskitty on 09/07/2009:
I notice my body gets like that too when I start exercise a lot more, its starts craving things unhealthy and I used to start binging at night on whatever. I have now learned that my body is just craving energy from working it out. But my brain still attached to unhealthy tenancies wants to intake "energy" that's not really good for my body at all. So I have replaced all the food in the house with only healthy things... So that when I do binge at least its not empty calories. Listen to your body. If you tend to binge when you get on a health kick it might be just wanting you to replace some of that energy you have been using up.

check this site out> it gives you a list of cravings and why you have them and what your body is truely seeking

http://www.naturopathyworks.com/pages/cravings.php

I used to crave chocolate on a daily basis and then I found this site and switched over to putting more nuts and seeds in my diet which was pretty much non existent in my diet before and I no longer get chocolate cravings as much as I did before. I would say once or twice a month I get a bad chocolate craving... way better then daily.



horn_of_plenty - Saturday Sep 05, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

i am actually happy in many respects with today.  I started out in binge mode this AM, but recovered completely.  I didn't leave the house till around 3, but that was a good move - as all i wanted to do this weekend was kinda chill out with my folks away and the house to myself. I watch a movie I had rented around 1pm....then, I finally headed out to the park! and how much do you think i walked!?

exercise: EIGHT miles at the park! wahoo!  that is good. I wanted 9, i really did, but i knew that too much is not a good idea and i didn't want to pass out! lol, i haven't done 8 miles in a long time. so this was good.

breakfast: i forgot but lots of yogurt, puddings, large coffee, and ice cream things...i did calculate calories throughout the day, so i still know my overall total.

snack: packaged fried tofu thing and yogurt

late snack around 3/early dinner: fiber one and soy milk, 300 cal.

rest of the day: all sorts of diet drinks

total calories: 1950.  very fine, very happy, definitely in my range.   :)...plus a light ice cream sandwich (i was STARVING) 150 more = 2100.fine! :)

37 day avg calories: 2326...after sandwich = 2330. :) it's ok.... :-)

tomorrow i go to visit grandma. not super excited. I know i have to behave - as in not binge.

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!


horn_of_plenty - Friday Sep 04, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

thanks to me, i've been talking more often to my Florida, yeah, florida guy.  he may be far away from here but it's still great to talk and we'll see where it goes from there.  he likes the phone calls...

today's new calorie total: 3,000 on the dot.  bleh. but i kinda just eased myself into this one!  it's ok, and i have 3 days to both relax and eat right coming up: sat, sun, mon! i am excited to have few plans if any and just to chill. i needed a weekend like this and i am happy to relax. plans are to watch movies and exercise. i think i can pull that off!   :)

(calorie average:2336, 36 day average.  3.5 lb gain if i had burned only 2,000 calories per day for 36 days. that is really crappy.)

exercise: 5 miles walking.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

edit: i'm in the midst of a "planned binge." i had many more calories after school (ate 850 before leaving school) and i wanted to use many more, eating whatever i wanted at the store. weird, but i don't care.

5:00pm planned sorta eating: popcorn, puddings, jello: 500, 3 ice creams 420, 6 pretzel sticks 240: 1160...and one more ice cream 140, yogurt 100

total: 2250 total. fine by me. i know it's a little high, but so the heck what!

soon out to the park to walk, then the gym. ooooh, right, weights....i think i'm saving it for tomorrow, not in the mood anymore for weights...

______________________________________

whew, up early to study at school...

breakfast: fig 50, large peach 80, coffee 50: 180.

snacks: 1 tea w. milk over the course of the morning and a bar: 300, also a hardboiled egg 70

lunch: microwave meal?  i want that, but i want to study at lunch, so i will have a BAR w. tea/milk: 300.  i'll just have to have one of the new meals i bought for dinner tonight!

total so far: 850.

snack: probably popcorn, yogurt or something like that. probably a new type of yogurt i haven't tried (need to change it up!)

dinner: microwave meal, kombucha!

exercise: i WILL do weights, no matter what today and i am excited for it!  bike to gym, elliptical, weights, abs, pushups, back.

tonight: watching a movie i rented, calling it an early night. so excited to rest up, rejuvinate these next 3 days, i need it bad!

 

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

omahagrl on 09/04/2009:
Hope your day went well and that you have a great weekend!



horn_of_plenty - Thursday Sep 03, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

avg 35 day calories: 2317, still.

total cal a tad high, 2300. not terrible though.

exercise: 3 miles walking, jogging.

breakfast: huge peach, coffee, diet sodas: 180

snack: powerbar, diet waters 250

lunch: microwave HEALTHY meal 400, lots of fiber and well balanced, tea w. milk and equal 50, AND birthday cake (strawberry shortcake) (i think 600 should be a good estimate but i could be SO OFF!, was a medium size piece) for a classmate. cake was worth having, it tasted great. total for lunch: 1050

snack: good, 4 cups diet soda, popcorn 240, yogurt 120: 360 :)

total so far before dinner: 1840...

dinner: not sure but i know i should not limit myself too much bc i'm in one of the moods where it's better to have a limit more than a little less and go crazy later on food. 

dinner:probably a microwave meal and veggies for like 400 more cal...460 cal.

exercise: park :)

i will definitely do weights at the gym tomorrow, i miss them!

many tests tomorrow, 3 in total. but, i really don't care too much about studying too much. it really doesn't matter anymore.

 this weekend i don't so much as want to limit what i eat, but i will also focus on me, relaxing, i want to watch a movie i rented last week, and i may rent one more movie. i don't have labor day plans, and i'm glad, i need to refocus on myself this weekend, badly...

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!


horn_of_plenty - Wednesday Sep 02, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

well this day has started.  and i must finish it. therapy tonight - good thing.  and psychologist visit also.  I was the one who asked for it bc i want to see the possibility of taking light antidepressants or something.

i just picked all of my nice long nails off last night after i ate my house.  i should not be feeling this way.  i am really, really feeling sad today.  my 27th birthday is in exactly a week from today. and i am not where i want to be, again, another birthday...this isn't good at all! what am i doing? god, please help me.  i do not know what to do anymore.  my body and brain are completely against each other.

breakfast: 170 large peach, large coffee.

snack: bar, diet waters? 250

LUNCH: bar, tea w. milk  280

700...

snack: 420, 20 = 440., LOL, and ice cream 500 :) was good? 940 here

1640.

Dinner: one red pepper 70, microwave wrap 180, large peach 90: around 360 or so....

total: 2,000. that is good.

exercise: bike to the gym, gym elliptical (no weights, no in the mood, at all.)

2317, 34 day average.

i will stop the count as soon as i get to 2250. then, my goal will simply be to lose 3 lbs. well, maybe not a simple goal but not an impossible goal either!

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

loveray on 09/02/2009:
im feelin it for you. i am lost myself again. hope we both find some strength to get out of the mess. xoxo


mskitty on 09/02/2009:
yeah I hate birthdays too. Birthdays and Christmas those are the worst. But its just another day, if you even get a little happy be thankful, if it sucks balls just use it as an excuse for yourself to rise outta the ashes and get back to achieving your goals knowing you deserve to feel good no matter what.


loveray on 09/02/2009:
i agree 100%. god is awake and listening to us, watching us. we are just not letting him do his divine work within us...constantly putting food as a roadblock in the way of the beautiful work to be done. i guess its getting used to living with someone who loves me no matter what- and its so hard to accept! you are right about the plan- and i posted what i am eating:)


Donkey on 09/02/2009:
I assume you are seeing a psychiatrist for the medication consultation. Please mention the binge eating because there are medications for that. (If s/he says no, mention Topamax.)

Please take a nap when you get home instead of eating. The same post-lunch fatigue hits my husband like that too. And me, to some degree. For me it happens when I have too many carbs at lunch. Most days, my husband comes home from working (7a-3p) and takes a nap right away.



horn_of_plenty - Tuesday Sep 01, 2009
(count calories/exercise/relaxing thoughts!)
Weight: 132.0

2327, 33 day average.

Since my return from vacation, July17th, i've gained about 3 lbs. I am setting out to lose them, and to reach 130. That is the goal. I weigh about 135 now. and I will reach 130 by the end of this month.

Dear God, give me the power to overcome these terrible binges.

binge, after school: total today 4500.

4.5 miles, late at night.

cereal, 2 yogurts: 540, chinese food 400, chips/fish 600, bread and cream cheese 250, cookies 260, milk/cookies 700, ice cream 250:  3,000

today is a new day.  but, is it really? because, you know, all of our actions affect us in the future.  treat your body badly and it will not feel good in the future.  everyday is a brand new day but we are not invincible.

breakfast: filling bowl of cereal and coffee diet cream soda: 350.

snack: vit waters and strawberries: 150

lunch: hot pretzel, ketchup/mustard and tea w. milk/4 equals. : 550 or so.

total so far: 1050  (the sugar highs/lows today were terrible...) all my fault for eating so many carbs and sweets yesterday.

snack: yogurt and diet soft drinks galore: 120

1170

dinner:veggies and packaged fried tofu (has weird amount of fiber and 200 cal. mostly healthy fats) and that is it no matter what. maybe a kombucha for good measure. 400 at most.

1570 calories. good.

exercise: goal: 4 miles.

:)

getting through this.

Progress as of today: 8 lbs lost so far, only 2 lbs to go!

Donkey on 09/01/2009:
You are so right. I hope today goes well for you.



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